1Paul Mundy and Bob Huggan www.mamud.com

Writing so readers can understand you

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Good writing

Arouses the reader’s interest Stirs the reader’s imagination Makes the reader feel the text is aimed

directly at him/her Presents believable evidence Gives good reasons for action

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KIS MII

Keep It Simple

Make It Interesting

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Easy-to-read writing

Use short, simple words Anglo-Saxon,

not French or Latin Use short, varied sentences

Average = 17 words Use short paragraphs

3-5 sentences each

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“The best way to be boring is to leave nothing out”

—Voltaire 1694–1778

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Easy-to-read writing

Be conversational Write like you talk Read it out loud

Use personal words I, you, we, our (not one, policy makers, scientists)

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Easy-to-read writing

Write in a logical order State the main point in 1 sentence Say why it is important Give the details

Check your grammar

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Short words are better than long words Numerous Many Individual Person, man or

woman Remainder Rest Initial First To implement To do Attempt Try Sufficient Enough Referred to as Called

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Use Anglo-Saxon, not Latin or French Facilitate Help Utilize Use Demonstrate Show Initiate, commence Begin In close proximity to Near Despite the fact that Although Endeavour Try

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Use Anglo-Saxon, not Latin or French Exerts a lethal effect Kills For the purpose of To In view of the fact that Because Is equipped with Has Magnitude Size Prior to Before Subsequent to After Until such time as Until Remunerate Pay Negatively affects Harms

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Use words the reader can understand The region has an annual surplus of water The region has more than enough water

Women are involved in the disposal of the output of rice production

Women sell the rice

Long aeroplane trips may lead to transmeridianal dyschronism

After a long plane trip you may have jet lag

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Cut out words

I’d like the steak with, near or adjacent to french fries, including but not limited to the mixed vegetables, accompanied, concurrent with, and at the same time as a beer.

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Cut out words The rural poor face multiple problems which are

interlocking in nature The rural poor face many interlocking problems

He initiated and facilitated the conduct of meetings and workshops...

He helped conduct meetings...

In the context of Rio de Janeiro… In Rio…

Lessons learned Lessons

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This man has a long sentence

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Use short sentences

This cooperative of vegetable growers in the rural village of Paliparan located in the municipality of Dasmariñas, Cavite province in the Philippines, was initiated as an interest group of 17 vegetable growers in 1982(31 words)

The cooperative is located in Paliparan village, about 40 km south of Manila, the Philippine capital. It began in 1982 when 17 vegetable growers formed an interest group(25 words, 2 sentences)

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Don’t make a sentence do too much work Its Community Resilience Campaign has refined a set of

strategies to facilitate grassroots women’s groups to take collective action and negotiate with local and national governments to build resilience of communities experiencing the adverse impacts of climate change and disasters. (40 words, 1 sentence)

Its Community Resilience Campaign helps communities affected by climate change and disasters. It has refined a set of strategies for grassroots women’s groups, including collective action and negotiating with local and national governments. (33 words, 2 sentences)

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Say what you mean

The actual process of rapid urban expansion takes place at the level of the informal community.

Cities grow quickly as people move into slums.

The long sentence game

Start with a short sentence The next person must repeat the sentence and add an

idea to it. The first person to cannot remember or who is unable to

add an item is out! Use as much jargon as possible!

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Reconstruction begins the day after a disaster

Reconstruction begins the day after a disaster, often with women leading the way.

Reconstruction begins the day after a disaster, often with women leading the way, using strategies developed through participatory approaches.

Reconstruction begins the day after a disaster, often with women leading the way, using strategies developed through participatory approaches to involve multiple stakeholders.

Reconstruction begins the day after a disaster, often with women leading the way, using strategies developed through participatory approaches to involve multiple stakeholders to build resilience.

Reconstruction begins the day after a disaster, often with women leading the way, using strategies developed through participatory approaches to involve multiple stakeholders to build resilience and mitigate further risk.

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Use active verbs, not passives The coop was initiated by the villagers… The villagers started the coop…

It was decided by the governor that the assistance to the project was to be suspended

The governor stopped supporting the project

Who does what?

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Milk extraction is done in presence of the calf attached to the foreleg of her mother

Before starting to milk, the herder ties the calf to its mother’s foreleg

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A member of the Zantiébougou cooperative making shea nut paste. She will cook the paste to make shea butter

Extracting the emulsion from the nuts by a member of the Zantiébougou Cooperative. It is this emulsion which, after cooking in a pot on the fire, gives shea butter

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Avoid weak verbs

Am, is, are, was, were Conduct, provide Promote, implement Take place

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Avoid weak verbs

She was a student of Indian history She studied Indian history

They conducted a study of the movement They studied the movement

They promoted the sale of medicinal plants They sold medicinal plants

IIRR implemented a strategy that resulted in the formation of 22 cooperatives

IIRR helped form 22 cooperatives

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Avoid weak starts

There is… There are… It is important to note that… Interestingly… It is self-evident that… It goes without saying that… I might add… It should be pointed out that…

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Turn abstract nouns into verbsAbstract nouns often end in -tion Acquisition Acquire, get Demonstration Demonstrate, show Guidance Guide

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Turn abstract nouns into verbs Clayey soil has maximum water retention ability

Find the noun that is built from a verb Turn it into a verb

Retention ► Retain Find the Anglo-Saxon equivalent

Retention ► Retain ► Hold

Clayey soil can hold the most water

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Turn abstract nouns into verbs The group plans the acquisition of a new vehicle The group wants to buy a jeep

The aim of the project was to... The project aimed to...

His conclusion was that the funds had been misappropriated by the cooperative leader

He concluded that the coop leader had stolen the money

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Avoid inflated prepositions and conjunctions With the possible exception of… Except For the reason that… Because In the context of… In He totally lacked the ability to… He couldn’t She was unable to give any

information beyond the fact that… She said

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Break up strings of nouns

The following innovative project implementation modes were effected

The project tested several new approaches

The vastness, remoteness and endemic drought have posed severe challenges to the pastoral production system

Pastoralists range over huge, remote, dry areas. That makes life for them difficult

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Break up strings of nouns

Generic human capacity development needs assessment methodology

A way to assess capacity-development needs that can be used elsewhere

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Get rid of prepositions

Especially of and by

The implementation of this project was undertaken by the project within the framework of the following objectives…

We aimed to do the following…

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Avoid unnecessary modifiers

Adjectives and adverbs often carry no meaningDelete them, or make them specific

He ran quickly to the shop He ran to the shop

The farmers successfully harvested 3 tons of maize The farmers harvested 3 tons of maize

She earned a good income She earned Rs 500

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Avoid repeated words

The components of the gender agenda aim to create a gender-responsive environment for gendering land tools, a review of gender-related land issues, gender and land analysis, land tools inventory from a gender perspective, piloting and scaling up of land tools that are particularly responsive to gender, evaluation of land tools from a gender perspective, and improving land governance with a gendered approach.

Network partners have to date focused the work in this area on evaluating land tools from a gender perspective (gender evaluation criteria), reviewing gender-related land issues (research), and improving land governance through gender equality and grassroots participation.

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Avoid repeated words

The components of the gender agenda aim to create a gender-responsive environment for gendering land tools, a review of gender-related land issues, gender and land analysis, land tools inventory from a gender perspective, piloting and scaling up of land tools that are particularly responsive to gender, evaluation of land tools from a gender perspective, and improving land governance with a gendered approach.

Network partners have to date focused the work in this area on evaluating land tools from a gender perspective (gender evaluation criteria), reviewing gender-related land issues (research), and improving land governance through gender equality and grassroots participation.

Gender x 14Land x 10Tool x 5

Evaluate x 3Perspective x 2Issue x 2

Review x 2Governance x 2Improving x 2

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Avoid repeated words

The network has evaluated land issues and tools from a gender perspective, developed capacity on gender-and-land issues, and studied the tenure rights of women and legal reforms that affect them. In the longer term, it also aims to ensure that gender is incorporated in all the land tools, and to pilot and scale up these tools.

Gender x 3Land x 3Tool x 3

Evaluate x 1Perspective x 1Issue x 2

Review x 0Governance x 0Improving x 0

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Be precise (1)

Words without much information: Fast, slow, good, bad, unusual, interesting…

Better to say how fast or slow, why something is good, bad, unusual or interesting

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Be precise (2)

Feed your baby frequently Breast-feed your baby every 2 or 3 hours, or

whenever he or she is hungry

Vegetable consumption rose slightly People in St Kitts ate 5% more vegetables last year

January rainfall is normally heavy The mean rainfall for January is 940 mm

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Avoid false precision

Too many significant digits The mean millet yield was 4.345 tons per

hectare …4.3 tons…

The average worker earns Rs 30.56 a day …Rs 30…

The population is 34,965,865 …35,000,000

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Add details if necessary…

…to make sure the reader understands clearly what you are saying

Use words that will build pictures in the reader’s mind

Construction of health infrastructure has the capacity to catalyse significant improvements in rural nutrition

New clinics can encourage rural people to eat better

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Provide enough information

The cooperative is located in the village of Paliparan in the municipality of Dasmariñas.

The cooperative is located in Paliparan village, about 40 km south of the Philippine capital of Manila

It borrows money from Pamana-ILCF and re-lends it to individual members of the coop at low interest rates

It borrows money from Pamana-ILCF, an IIRR-supported credit cooperative. It relends this money to members at 7.5% interest a year

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KIS MII

Keep It Simple

Make It Interesting

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More information

Wikipedia: Weasel word http://tinyurl.com/5wrdw8

Ten quick tips to improve your writing http://tinyurl.com/2h5e4h

Improve your writing: Your role as a writer http://tinyurl.com/lty2rs