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Parents Of Murdered Children, Inc. VALLEY OF THE SUN CHAPTER
F “For the Families & Friends of those who have died by violence”
19620 North 38th Avenue, Glendale AZ 85308-2215
Chapter Phone: (602) 254-8818 Chapter E-mail: [email protected]
* National Organization of Parents Of Murdered Children, Inc. (POMC)
4960 Ridge Ave. Suite 2, Cincinnati, OH, 45209 (513) 721-5683 Fax: (513) 345-4489
Toll Free Number (888) 818-7662
http://www.pomc.com/phoenix/index.html Volume 25: No. 2 February 2016 https://www.facebook.com/pages/POMC-Valley-of-the-Sun/
MONTHLY SUPPORT MEETING
LOCATIONS 4
th Tuesday - Grief Support Meetings
All Meetings Start At 7:00 PM
◄EAST VALLEY MEETING►
Tuesday, February 23 7:00 PM
Mountain View Lutheran Church
11002 S. 48th
Street, Phoenix AZ
Room #8
(1/2 mile West of I-10 at 48th
Street & Elliot)
Facilitator: Claudia Marco
480-290-3908
◄WEST VALLEY MEETING►
Tuesday, February 23 7:00 PM
Antioch Church of God in Christ
9600 West Peoria Avenue, Peoria AZ
Family Room
(NW Corner of 96th Ave/W Peoria Ave)
Facilitator: Kathy Hernandez Schofield
623-707-6825
◄CENTRAL VALLEY MEETING►
Tuesday, February 23 7:00 PM
Mountain View Police Precinct
Community Room
2075 East Maryland, Phoenix AZ
Facilitator: Beckie Miller
623-582-2406
◄SPANISH SPEAKING MEETING►
Tuesday, February 23 7:00 PM
Queen of Peace Church
30 West 1st Street Room St. John 7
Mesa, AZ 85201
Facilitators: Sandy & Paulino Navarro
480-695-4789
◄◄SPEAKER/INFORMATION►►
MEETING (2nd Tuesday of each month)
Tuesday, February 9, 7:00 PM
*** Mountain View Police Precinct
Community Room
2075 East Maryland, Phoenix AZ
(off AZ 51 at 20th Street between Glendale
Avenue and Bethany Home Road -
Across from Granada Park)
*Our meeting this month will feature
retired Judge Ron Reinstein, who will speak
about the Supreme Court Commission on
Victims in Court. Judge Reinstein has been
a long-time supporter of our chapter.
NEWSLETTER EDITOR
Mail Memorial Page items for “The Journey” by
the 10th
of the month prior to publication month to:
POMC Newsletter
19620 North 38th Ave Glendale AZ 85308-2215
*Please use order form on Page 11
You can also email items to [email protected]
Be sure to place any article or picture in an
attachment, otherwise it can’t be accessed
properly (especially pictures) and may not be
used. Also, be sure to put POMC Newsletter in
the subject line of the email.
CRIME VICTIMS LEGAL ASSISTANCE
PROJECT
Free legal aid to help assert victims' rights
through Arizona Voice for Crime Victims @
(480) 600-2661, P.O. Box 12722, Scottsdale,
AZ 85261 or contact Mary Wallace at
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Edward Antonio Griffin
February 2008
Donald Taylor
February, 1997
Mary Martinez
February 1, 2000
Austin Martin
February 1, 2005
Merritt “Dustin” May
February 1, 2008
Jesse Rocha
February 1, 2012
Jay Rocha-Lopez
February 1, 2013
Richard W. Boeck
February 2, 1981
Robert Christopher Colter
February 2, 2000
Cody Klemp
February 2, 2004
Merritt “Dustin” May-
Hawley
February 2, 2008
Jackie V. Cruz
February 2, 2013
Tyrice Thompson
February 2, 2013
Bob Krahn
February 3, 1996
Roy Wayne Sheperd, Jr.
February 4, 1993
Djana Danelle Sosh
February 4, 1997
Antonio Francisco
Caudillo
February 4, 2001
Damon Brown
February 4, 2007
Roland Davenport
February 4, 2009
Richard Aguilar
February 4, 2012
Salvatore Muna
February 4, 2015
Brayvon Lacy
February 5, 2008
Pearl Alyza Chavez
February 6, 1998
Ted Schlicker
February 6, 2008
Louie Mikita
February 7, 2003
Edward Aguirire
February 7, 2012
Patrick Eberhardt
February 7, 2015
Angeline Plummer
February 8, 2005
Michelle Cohen-Anglan
February 9, 1996
Richard Allen Lefor, Jr
February 9, 2006
Heather Rademacher
February 10, 1995
Beto Dagoberto E. Casillas
February 10, 1996
Gary Thompson
February 10, 2005
Christopher C. Sanchez
February 11, 2007
Malachi Brewster
February 12, 2008
Sir Xavier F. Brooks
February 12, 2011
Chris Pervorse
February 13, 2001
William Leslein
February 14, 1997
Timothy Miles Glisson
February 14, 1995
Ernie Gray
February 14, 1997
Uriah Laskowsky
February 14, 2002
Marquis Robinson
February 14, 2013
Justin O’Brien
February 15, 1998
Chad Elmer Henderson
February 15, 2004
Alexandria & Daniel
February 16, 1997
Stacy Carranza
February 16, 2002
Kevin Johnson
February 16, 2003
Elisa Sue Martinez
February 17, 1990
“Death leaves a heartache no one can heal. Love leaves a memory no one can steal.”
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Continued. . . .
Jimmie Hatley
February 17, 2002
Howard F. Adams
February 18, 1978
Officer Anthony Jon Holly
February 19, 2007
Lance Taylor
February 19, 2010
Fred Wayne Wann
February 19, 1999
Jude Nicksic
February 20, 2000
Kenneth Ray Burton
February 21, 1994
Debbie Gomez &
Alfonso McCoy
February 21, 2001
Steven & Shane Duffy
Tammy, Cassie & Jacob
Lovell
February 21, 2006
Austin Martin
February 21, 2006
Tomacina Pasoz
February 23, 1996
Joe Furda
February 23, 2000
Angel Alonzo, III
February 24, 1990
Joshua Adam Walker
February 24, 2001
Lance Barker
February 24, 2006
Jon Paul Caudill
February 24, 2007
John Rideau
February 25, 1994
Bill Bennett
February 25, 1995
Jason Marsh
February 25, 1997
Jenny Mendez
February 25, 2000
Charles Winters
February 26, 1977
Michael Garcia, Jr.
February 26, 2008
Terry Lee Shipley
February 27, 1978
Joshua James Bartley
February 27, 2015
Robert Carl Hernandez
February 28, 1998
Richard Martinez
February 28, 2009
Tyrell Patterson
February 27, 2010
Janice O’Banion
February 28, 2006
Theodore Ortega
February 28, 2007
My Wish For You
On This Valentine’s Day
By Sandy Fox
May love catch you by the throat and
force your lips to break into a smile.
May the files of logic be corrupted in
your brain by a bug called LOVE.
May you unleash a storm of affection on
your loved ones. May chocolates, candies
and lovely treats bombard your family
members, friends, and dear ones.
May you always have wonderful
memories of your child (spouse, loved
one) who could not be with you
physically on this day but will always be
with you in your heart
Every effort is made to ensure accuracy
on these pages. Please notify us
immediately with any errors or changes.
4
VALLEY OF THE SUN CHAPTER NEWS
TRIAL, JUDICIAL & ARREST UPDATES
• Trial for the killer of, Scott Michael Johnson, son of Roberta Johnson, who was murdered in September of
2010 has ended with a guilty verdict. He was sentenced in January to 21-years.
“Our hearts, thoughts and prayers are with each and every family member as they endure this difficult
process.”
IN LOVING MEMORY GIFT DONATIONS (THANK YOU!) (*All donations are tax deductible: Our chapter exists on the generosity of others, grants, and fundraisers)
♥ Ying and Josephine Liu in very loving memory of their son, David Liu.
♥ Juliet Carrion in very loving memory of her brother, Jesse Carrion.
♥ Penny Metzger in very loving memory of her friend, Nancy Voelker
♥ Judy & Roy Wood in very loving memory of their son, Scott Wood.
♥ Sandy & Paulino Navarro in very loving memory of their son, Michael Garcia.
♥ Don & Beckie Miller in very loving memory of their son, Brian Ray Miller.
♥ Carolee Holbrook in very loving memory of her son, Brett Holbrook.
CORPORATE & OTHER DONATIONS THANK YOU! UNITED WAY (Please Note: the write-in number to designate funds to our chapter through your employee
contributions is 0772). You must use this number for designating any funds to go to our chapter. Our chapter
name is not listed except by number.
AMERICAN EXPRESS - Donations from Norma Yanez; anonymous; Lindison Y. Webb, in honor of
Del Edward Webb; and Tara E. Williams in memory of her brother Kirk Best, and mom, Sally Whitney.
DAVID H. LIU FOUNDATION
MESA UNITED WAY (City of Mesa)
COLD CASE REGISTRY FOR HOMICIDES (PHOENIX POLICE DEPARTMENT)
The Phoenix Police Department has a Cold Case Registry on line. The link is
http://phoenix.gov/police/investigations/coldcase/index.html.
COLD CASE REGISTRY FOR HOMICIDES MCSO (SHERIFF'S OFFICE)
The Maricopa County Sheriff's Office has a cold case registry for any victim, victim's family member, or other
lawful representative of a victim of a cold case who requests to be included in the registry. This process
provides law enforcement with an avenue to contact family when there are new developments in the case.
In order to submit a request, please contact the MCSO Homicide Unit. Telephone: 602-876-1087. E-mail:
FRY'S COMMUNITY REWARDS PROGRAM FUNDRAISER FOR OUR CHAPTER
Our chapter is now a part of the Fry's Community Rewards program. If you shop there, you can simply sign up
(one time only) to connect your VIP card and we will get a percentage of proceeds. Just go to
http://www.frysfood.com, select Register, under Sign In information, enter your email and create a password.
Select User Card # and enter your Fry's VIP number, last name and zip code. Under Select Your Preferred
Store, enter zip code of that store. Select Find Your Store then select Create Account. You will be prompted to
confirm your email. Click the hyperlink to finish creating your Online Account. If you already have an Online
Account with Fry's, you can skip this and go to https://frysfood.com/topic/community?activePage=community-
rewards-2. Select Sign In and enter your email and password. Select My Account and then Account Settings
from drop down menu. Click Edit under Community Awards. Under Find Your Organization, select box next
to POMC and enter the NPO number #29432. Save changes and you are good to go. If you have registered
correctly, you should see our organization information listed under "Community Rewards" on your account
summary page. Thanks for your support.
5
CHAPTER SIBLING COORDINATOR Amanda Harris is our Sibling Coordinator and provides support for siblings outside of meetings. You can
reach her by phone for more information at 623-866-3189 or email her at [email protected]. Amanda
lost her brother Joshua to murder and understands the sibling grief in a way only a sibling can.
AFFIRMATION OF POMC NON-DISCRIMINATION POLICY
“It shall be the policy of Parents Of Murdered Children, Inc., to provide equal membership/employment service
opportunities to all eligible persons without regard to race, religion, color, national origin, citizenship, age, sex,
sexual orientation, marital status, parental status, disabilities, membership in any labor organization, political
affiliation, and for employment only, height, weight, and record of arrest without conviction.”
*If you feel you have been discriminated against you may file a complaint with our National Office, 4960
Ridge Avenue, Suite 2, Cincinnati, Ohio 45209. www.pomc.org (513) 721-5683
To refer a complaint to an appropriate investigating entity:
Office for Civil Rights
Office of Justice Programs
U.S. Department of Justice
810 7th
Street, NW
Washington, D.C. 20531
www.ojp.gov
In order to file with the federal Office for Civil Rights (OCR) two forms must be downloaded from the internet
and submitted in writing to the ORC. The forms can be found at www.ojp.gov/about/ocr/complaint.htm.
Arizona Department of Public Safety
VOCA Administration
Civil Rights Coordinator
PO Box 6638 - MD 1320
Phoenix AZ 85005-6638
(602) 223-2491
www.azdps.gov/services/crime_victims
JANUARY 2016 BOARD OF DIRECTORS ELECTIONS
At the speaker meeting in January, we will have our annual board of directors for your chapter election meeting.
We will have at least one opening for the coming term. Requirements for the board are that it must have been at
least one year since the murder of your loved one and usually it is best if your court proceedings and trial are
over with. Responsibilities of the board are to attend bi-monthly board of directors’ meetings, usually on the
second Saturday of the corresponding month at 10:00 a.m., as well as helping with all chapter events. If
interested in being considered for the board, please contact Beckie at 602-254-8818 and or email her
MESSAGES FROM MEMBERS & OTHERS
Dear Friends at POMC:
Thank you very much for the gifts (from the Holiday Memorial Service). Suzie loves her bag of goodies
especially her new Teddy Puppy. The treats were completely enjoyed, although she has to do tricks to earn one
of the delicacies.
Also, thank you for the human gifts. We love the story on them and the reminder about helping just one.
While we are no longer with Extra Mile Ministries, our work is taking us to many places doing crisis response.
We look forward to our continued involvement with POMC and our many friendships that have developed in
your organization.
Jen, Allen and Suzie (the comfort dog)
◄◄◄◄◄ANNUAL FUNDRAISER AUCTION AND DINNER – FEBRUARY 26►►►►►
Please note our flyer in this issue of the “The Journey” regarding this important event to raise much needed
funds for your chapter to provide its programs and services. It takes a village and we need your support in
attending the event and or donating prizes for the auctions (silent and live). You can pay for tickets at the door
but you must RSVP to attend, so that we have the correct number of participants for the catering count.
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NATIONAL POMC INFORMATION ☺ CINCINNATI OHIO OFFICE☺ 4960 Ridge Avenue, Ste 2, Cincinnati OH 45209
888-818-7662 Website: www.pomc.org
•The POMC CATALOG has been added to the home page on the website. Please check out the website www.pomc.org
for our inventory of sale items. Some of the items are new and are available for purchase. Some of the older items are on
sale.
•SAVE THE DATE: The 30th National Conference will be July 21-24, 2016, at the Sheraton Lake Buena Vista Resort,
Orlando, Florida. Call 800-423-3297 to make reservations. The hotel price is $99.00 (includes resort fee of $19.95), so
make sure they do not charge you extra. For brochure and more information, see website www.pomc.org. It’s not too
early to think of silent auction items/table gifts donations. For table gifts donations, you can email Marie Belmontez,
[email protected] to let her know. For silent auction items, contact Carol Leonhardt, [email protected]. If
you would like to donate either, send them to National at:
2016 National POMC Conference
4960 Ridge Ave. Ste. 2
Cincinnati, OH 45209-1075
●SURVIVORS NEWSLETTER: The National Newsletter is going green and we are currently in the process of getting
email addresses and switching over. If you do not have a computer or access to one you will still receive a hard copy if
you notify the National Office. There is a lot of time put in to creating, editing and assembling the Newsletter for
distribution thus we will still charge $10 for the subscription. POMC's effort to be more cost effective, generate some
income, and going green make it a logical step to take.
●DONATIONS AND SUPPORT OF NATIONAL POMC: There are many ways to help with much needed funds for
POMC including any items you buy on Amazon.com, as well as if you shop the Kroger Stores. It is very simple and does
not cost you anything and yet your purchase allows a percentage from these companies to go directly to National. Please
go on-line to www.pomc.org and see how you can sign up for this or contact Bev Warnock - [email protected]
POMC Goodsearch donates money to POMC when you search the Internet, shop online or dine out at local restaurants!
Use Goodsearch.com to search the Internet and they donate a penny per search to POMC. Use Goodshop.com when you
shop online and they donate a percentage of every purchase and offer over 100,000 coupons to help you save money too!
Sign up for their Good dining program and they'll donate a percentage of your restaurant bill when you eat at any one of
thousands of participating restaurants. It's really easy, it's free and turns simple everyday actions into a way to help
POMC. Please sign up today to help support Parents Of Murdered Children - POMC. Go to www.goodsearch.com to get
started.
NEW FUNDRAISER: No need to worry about parking or getting a designated driver-we've partnered with Uber to get
everyone to and from events safely! Uber is evolving the way the world moves. By seamlessly connecting riders to drivers
through our app, Uber makes cities more accessible, opening up more possibilities for riders and more business for
drivers. New to Uber? Sign up with promo code POMCORG to get your first ride FREE, up to $20! Plus, Uber will
donate $5 back to POMC. Check out Uber pro tips here: uber.com/features. Promo Code: POMCORG Sign up Link:
Uber.com/go/pomc.org ●AUTO DONATIONS: We are encouraging all chapters and contact persons to get involved with POMC Debit Authorization. You
can now donate to NATIONAL POMC by setting up an automatic withdrawal from your bank account to National. Contact National
for a debit authorization form. This is a fast and easy way to make a donation to National to help us help others. Your donation is
withdrawn at the same time of the month, each month, and no amount is too small. We appreciate your help during these difficult
economic times.
●PAROLE BLOCK PROGRAM: To date, this program has kept more than 1509 prisoners who committed murders
from being released early. Parole Block was begun in 1990 and all members across the United States whose loved one’s
killer is up for early release/parole consideration can file a petition with National that is sent nationwide for signatures
protesting their release.
SECOND OPINION SERVICES: A program that provides second opinions on unsolved or complicated cases by a
national board comprised solely of experts in the medical, law enforcement and investigative fields. MURDER IS NOT ENTERTAINMENT (MINE) PROGRAM: Through this program, POMC raises public awareness to the
insensitivity of murder as entertainment through toys, games, murder mystery weekends, drive-by shooting fashions, serial killer
trading cards, and anything that glamorizes violence.
BIG TURN OFF: This is an annual event, each January, in which citizens are asked to turn off their televisions for one evening
during prime time hours to protest the violence on television.
MURDER WALL: A traveling tribute honoring the memories of murder victims. A photo album is also available with each plaque.
Currently, the cost is $75 to add your loved ones’ names to the Walnut Plaques that comprise the Murder Wall. You have two pages
for the photo album to add information, poetry or pictures.
SILENCED VOICES: A program begun in January 2002, which advocates for the vigorous investigation and
prosecution of those responsible for the murder of abused children. The first case was that of Brandi Conley. POMC was
instrumental in bringing charges against her parents.
Parents Of Murdered Children, Inc.
Valley of the Sun Chapter “For the Families and Friends of Those Who Have Died By Violence”
Providing Support, Advocacy, Education, Awareness & Prevention
FUNDRAISER DINNER & AUCTION PLEASE JOIN US FOR OUR 21st ANNUAL EVENT
February 26, 2016, 5:30 pm at the *El Zaribah Shriners
552 North 40th Street, Phoenix Arizona 85008
Silent Auction - Live Auction -Dancing
PRIZES FOR THE AUCTION INCLUDES:
Numerous Gift Baskets of Various Themes, Jewelry, Art Work, Electronics, Gift
Certificates, Children’s Toys, Collectibles, Hotel/Resort Weekend Getaways,
Sports Memorabilia, Sporting Event Tickets, & more
*Special thanks to Pot of Gold Auctions for providing auctioneer services for our event.
●We need your support for this worthy cause and we need donated prizes for the auction from
individuals or businesses.
●Call (602) 254-8818 for more information, to donate, and or to purchase tickets for the event
and RSVP to reserve your dinner spot. Tickets for the event’s dinner are $30 for adults and $15
for children, ages 3 through 12. Credit Cards, Cash or Checks will be accepted. (Tables of 8 are
available for $240)
●POMC is a non-profit organization with 501 © 3 status, and all donations are
tax deductible.
●Donations may be made out to POMC, Valley of the Sun Chapter and mailed
to: 19620 North 38th Avenue, Glendale AZ 85308-2215
***Sponsorships for the event and all donations will be listed in the event program.
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Grief and the Burden of Guilt (By Marty Tousley, RN, MS, FT, DCC)
“Guilt is perhaps the most painful companion of death.” Coco Chanel
Guilt is a normal response to the perception that we’ve somehow failed in our duties and obligations or that
we’ve done something wrong. It generates a jumbled mixture of feelings, including doubt, shame, inadequacy,
insecurity, failure, unworthiness, self-judgement and blame, anxiety and fear of punishment.
Tips for Coping with Guilt:
•Identify what is that you feel guilty about.
Resist the urge to keep such thoughts and feelings to yourself like so many deep, dark secrets. Bring them out
into the open where they can be examined. Share them with a trusted friend or counselor, who can view your
thoughts and feelings more objectively, and challenge what may be irrational or illogical.
•Listen to the messages you give yourself, (the should haves, could haves and if onlys), and realize the past
is something you can do absolutely nothing about.
•When guilty thoughts come to mind, disrupt them by telling yourself to stop thinking such thoughts. Say
“STOP!” firmly, and out loud if you need to.
•Live the next day or next week of your life as if you were guilt-free, knowing you can return to your guilt
feelings any time you wish. Pick a start time, and stop yourself when you make any guilt-related statements.
•Write down your guilt-related statements, set a date, and pledge from that date forward, you won’t say them
to yourself anymore. Post them and read them every day.
•If you are troubled by feeling relieved that your loved one’s suffering has ended, know that a heavy burden
has been lifted from your shoulders; you have been released from an emotionally exhausting and physically
exhausting experience, and to feel relieved is certainly understandable.
•If you believe in God or a higher power, consider what He or She has to say about forgiveness.
•Participate in a support group – it’s a powerful way to obtain forgiveness and absolution from others.
•Be your own best friend. What would you have said to your best friend if this had happened to that person?
Can you say the same to yourself?
•Remember the good things you did in your relationship with your loved one and all the loving care you
gave. Focus on the positive aspects; what you learned from each other, what you did together that brought you
joy, laughter and excitement. Write those things down, hold onto them and read them whenever you need to.
•As what you expected of yourself that you didn’t live up to. How is that you didn’t? What were the
circumstances at the time? What have you learned from this that you’ll do differently next time?
•What can you do to make amends? Find a way to genuinely apologize to your loved one’s spirit and ask for
forgiveness.
•Have a visit with your loved one. Say aloud or in your mind whatever you didn’t get to say while your
loved one was still living. Be as honest as you can be.
•Have your loved one write a letter to you. What would this person say to you about the guilt and sadness
you’ve been carrying around?
•Ask what it would take for you to forgive yourself. Can you begin doing it? Say out loud to yourself, “I
forgive you.” Say it several times a day.
•Remember that no one else can absolve your feelings of guilt – only you can do so, through the process of
intentionally forgiving yourself.
•When you’ve consciously learned all you can learn from this situation, and when you’ve made amends you
consider necessary, then it’s time to let go of your guilt, to forgive yourself, and to move on.
•Channel the energy of your guilt into a worthwhile project. Do good deeds in your loved one’s honor.
http://www.griefhealingblog.com/2012/12 grief-and-burden-of-guilt.html.
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RIPPLES (By Pat Noel)
When we carried our precious children in our wombs, we had nine months to prepare to be mothers. We felt
our babies move; we heard their heartbeats. By taking care of ourselves, we were taking care of them. After
they were born, we held them, loved them, sang to them. If they were hurt or sad, we sat them on our laps and
hugged them and kissed their boo boos better. We watched them take their first steps and sent them off to
school. Some of us had the good fortune of watching them grow, and we welcomed their friends into our
homes.
Then it all stopped. We have walked through the looking glass and are in a different world, one in which we
could not have prepared to live, one in which we do not want to live. Our hearts are broken, and we just want
our children back. We feel frightened, alone and angry. We have read about other children dying, or maybe we
have known mothers who have lost children. But that kind of thing only happens to “other people.” Now, we
are the other people.
There are no words of wisdom for us, no words can make us heal completely. But then, do we really want to
heal completely? From my son’s death, I have learned that I must be gentle with myself and accept the fact that
I have limits. I cannot be everything for everyone, and if I choose to say no, people will still like me. If they
don’t, that is their problem.
There is a hole in my heart. But that hole, while it will never be completely healed, has been filled with
understanding, insight and compassion for others that I could never have had before. I have learned to listen
with spirit ears, to see with spirit eyes. There is more to life that our human minds can comprehend, and we
must accept the fact that we can’t know it all while still on this earth.
Death simply means the spirit has left the body. It does not mean that this child has just died and is in the
ground. It does not mean that this child’s life and message have ended. It is not the end of the story.
Although I have more friends than I realized, I have had to keep a distance from some who don’t talk about
my son or who have never acknowledged his death. But I still love them and understand their difficulty with
this. I just have to take care of myself right now.
I believe that everyone has an inner spirit—the one that went to God with my son, the one that is a part of
God. In all of us, that light has been covered by many layers of humanness, and it doesn’t shine as brightly. We
need to work every day on peeling off the layers of “crust” that cover the light in us.
Since part of my son’s light shines in me now, I must carry on with what he left behind. I don’t have to do
anything grand. I do have to remember what kind of person he was, what was important to him, and continue
that. I will continue to love the people he loved. His greatest gift was that he always gave his time to people. He
didn’t rush around and simply say hello to people in passing, he stopped and talked, even it if it caused him to
get a parking ticket, (yes, that really did happen). He never once spoke a bad word about anyone and wouldn’t
tolerate other people doing it. With love, he would stop a negative conversation. He always wanted people to be
happy, and he always made others laugh. He was funny.
Although I may feel alone sometimes, really I am not. There are loving people all around me, and even if
they don’t show it or say anything, I have learned to recognize their love and the concern in their eyes. After all,
what can someone say to a grieving mother or father? I am a grieving mother and I still don’t know what to say.
One day, I was sitting by a lake in Maine. It was raining. I have always believed that our lives are like a
pebble being tossed into the water. It makes a splash, and that splash ripples outward in a circle. Now, I am the
pebble that was tossed. My actions ripple outward like the ripples caused by that pebble.
As I watched the rain in the lake, there were many ripples caused by the raindrops. Initially, there were
separate drops, but as they spread, they grew into one another and crossed paths. All of our actions, thoughts
and feelings affect everyone else, one person at a time. It also means that our feelings of loss and sorrow and
broken heartedness are shared by others.
We are not alone…
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January (the second Wednesday) we have our annual Big Turn Off. POMC asks that during the prime time hours of this Wednesday evening, you do not watch television to protest the violence on prime time that affects our vulnerable children.
February (last Friday each year) is our annual fundraiser dinner and auction held on February 26, 2016. This event is our chapter’s only major fundraiser each year to help provide funds for our programs and services free to our membership. 4 monthly support meetings in West, East & Central Valley (fourth Tuesdays each month) *Spanish Speaking in Mesa is new this year 1 monthly speaker/information meeting (2nd Tuesday each month) *at this meeting we have counselors, grief specialists, judges, prosecutors, medical examiner, detectives etc., help us to better understand the grief and or judicial process but it is also a time for us to teach the professionals how better they can serve survivors and what issues we face. April 10 – 16 is the National Crime Victims’ Rights week and there are usually several events by different organizations around the valley and the state to commemorate the passage of Crime Victims’ rights. Many of you who have lost your loved one in recent years do not understand that 30 years ago victims had no rights in the criminal justice system and could not even attend the trial but had to sit in the hallway. They were not notified of hearings, early releases, plea agreements – and were not treated with dignity and respect. Arizona passed Crime Victims’ Rights legislation in 1990 due to a lot of hard work from victims, victim advocates and more. Spring (April 29 – May 1, 2016) Courage to Grieve Retreat in Pine, Arizona again in the Fall (October 21 - 23, 2015). *There is no charge to attend this wonderful weekend of hope and healing, learning coping skills and addressing the deep emotional pain experienced by survivors. *POMC National Conference, July 21 – 24, Orlando, Florida www.pomc.org Our conferences are an
amazing source of education on traumatic grief and navigating the confusing maze of the criminal
justice system as well as networking with other professional groups and survivors and so much more.
Plan to attend.
September: National Day of Remembrance for Murder Victims picnic/commemoration (Saturday, September 24, 2016). While POMC, nationally, has commemorated this day for 17 years within our organization, it officially became our Nation’s National Day of Remembrance in 2008 when Congress passed a resolution approving it.
December 3, 2016 (first Saturday) annual Holiday Memorial Service and Appreciation Awards
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VALLEY OF THE SUN
BOARD OF DIRECTORS (2015)
Beckie Miller, Chapter-Leader .......... .(623) 582-2406 Don Miller, Treasurer ....................... .(623) 582-2406 Claudia Marco, Co-Leader/Secretary..(480) 290-3908 Amanda Harris, Co-Leader..................(623) 866-3189 Kathy Hernandez,................................(623) 707-6825 Tim Osolin ....................................... ...(602) 615-7096 Mary Wallace……………………….…...480) 695-4789 Denise Brewer..……………………......(917) 696-2928 Sandy Navarro.....................................(480) 695-4789 Paulino Navarro...................................(602) 828-1106 Arrow McCullough................................(602) 588-9834 (Volunteers) Carolee Holbrook - Office Assistance Denise Brewer - Anniversary Note Writer Kathy Hernandez - Facebook Page Coordinator
CONTACT NUMBERS
SIBLING SUPPORT: Amanda Harris is our chapter's
Sibling Coordinator providing support for siblings. Her
contact info is 623-866-3189 or email:
POMC VOICE MESSAGING)....................(602) 254-8818
Chapter E-mail.……………………. [email protected]
Chapter Fax: .................................................(623) 582-0917
CRISIS LINE/MOBILE CRISIS TEAM
Empact Crisis Line ............................ ..(480) 784-4949
OTHER HELP LINES
Teen Lifeline.......................................…...(602) 248-8336
GrandCare (Grandparents help line) .....(602) 274-5022
Crime Victims Legal Assistance Project (480) 965-5640
MCAO Victim Services.............................(602) 506-8522
Crime Victim Compensation....................(602) 506-4955
♥♥♥ THANKS FOR CARING ♥♥♥ To the Mountain View Police Precinct for donating our meeting room, as well as Antioch Church of God in Christ, Mountain View Lutheran Church, and Trinity Fellowship. To the Department of Public Safety (VOCA), for the grant for our newsletter, and everyone who has donated gifts of their time, talents and energy to our chapter activities. With your help we are able to continue the outreach that is needed by our community.
Memorial Wall Order Form
Please add my loved one’s name to the “Valley of
the Sun Memorial Wall in their Memories.” Each
Nameplate is $10. Our wall is displayed at many
special events across the valley during the year.
NAME__________________________________
Age:___________ Murder date: _____________
Picture Board
___ Check here if sending picture for the picture
board & Holiday Memorial (no cost).
Picture Buttons
___Please make #____picture buttons of my loved
one. (Enclose photo) Each button is 3”, and costs
$5 each which includes postage and handling.
** Send a Self Addressed Stamped Envelope if
you want your photo returned. You may also
e-mail photo to [email protected]
*Make all checks out to POMC
*Mail to 19620 North 38th Avenue
Glendale AZ 85308-2215
“The Journey” Memorial Order Form (newsletter)
Please reserve: □ ½ page (suggested donation of $10)
□ Full pg (suggested donation of $20)
Month you wish memorial to appear in: ________________
Loved One’s Name________________________________
Age _____
Date of Death_______________
YOUR Name_____________________________________
YOUR Phone Number______________________________
YOUR E-MAIL __________________________________
A half page will hold a picture and short poem OR message,
depending on space. If a photo is included, please provide
identification of the person on the back. If you wish the photo to
be returned include a self-addressed stamped envelope, big
enough for the picture to fit in. Unless otherwise specified,
location, size and structure of the text and picture will be at
editor’s discretion and space permitting.
**We also, if space is available, print "Survivor to Survivor"
stories if you would like to send in a one page, single spaced and
typed document. Also, if you have written poetry about your loss
or have a favorite poem to share with others. We do edit for
misspellings and or profanity. There is no charge for these
items, either poetry or shared stories.
*Return this form with your material for The Journey by the 10th
of the month preceding the issue you wish it to appear in; for
example: September 10 for October's newsletter, etc.
*A donation for the memorial page can be made by sending a
check made out to POMC and mailed in care of:
Newsletter Editor
Valley of the Sun POMC
19620 North 38th Avenue
Glendale AZ 85308-2215
Return Address PARENTS OF MURDERED CHILDREN, INC. VALLEY OF THE SUN CHAPTER
19620 North 38th Avenue Glendale AZ 85308-2215 (602) 254-8818
WHY WE ARE HERE: MISSION STATEMENT: “POMC makes the difference through ongoing emotional support, education, prevention, advocacy, and awareness.” VISION STATEMENT: “To provide support and assistance to all survivors of homicide victims while working to create a world free of murder.” This project is supported by Grant No. 2014-VA-GX-0018 from the US Department of Justice - Office for Victims of Crime. The opinions, findings, and conclusions or recommendations expressed in this publication/program/exhibition are those of the author(s) and do not necessarily reflect the views of the US DOJ or the Arizona Department of Public Safety.
Parents Of Murdered Children, Inc., is a self-help organization dedicated to the aftermath of murder. The success of its mission depends upon the participation of the families and friends of those lost to murder. POMC number (602) 254-8818