pamphlet 02 friends

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  • 8/14/2019 Pamphlet 02 Friends

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    Prepared by Shawana A. Aziz forFor online Islamic courses, audio lectures and informative articles

    Visit us at

    Quraan Sunnah Educational Programs

    www.qsep.com

    Distributed by Enlightenment into Islam Study Circle - Womens committeePostal Address

    Telephone: Fax: Email:

    : Revival of Islamic Heritage Society - Women's CommitteeAttention: Enlightenment into Islam - P.O.Box: 5585, Saffat 13056, KUWAIT532-9259 (Direct Line), 257 0022 - 534-2573 [email protected]

    The Prophet cited an extraordinary comparison between righteous company andevil association. He mentioned, 'Verily, the example of a good companion in comparison

    to an evil one is like that of the musk seller and the blacksmith's bellow. From the first

    you would either get a gift of his musk's scent, buy some from him, or enjoy its good smell,

    while the bellow will either burn your clothes, or give you a bad, nasty smell thereof.'

    [Agreed upon] Thus, we need to be very careful when choosing associates and along these

    lines, a Muslim should be very much concerned to understand the Islamic perspective of

    friendship and characteristics of a good companion, in order to choose the right person to

    associate with. Following are some guidelines deduced from the teachings of the Qur'aan

    and the Sunnah, which designate the characteristics of a Muslims friends.

    Man is liable to imitate and copy those whom he befriends. If ones friends

    engage in virtuous deeds, this would prompt him to imitate good qualities.

    Whereas, if ones friends indulge in bad practices, then it is very likely for

    him to get accustomed with their bad characteristics and eventually

    incorporate them in his behavior, knowingly or unknowingly! Such is also true

    concerning ones beliefs as Allahs Messenger is reported to have said,

    http://www.qsep.com/mailto:[email protected]:[email protected]://www.qsep.com/
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    Faith:

    Righteousness, God-fearing:

    Morals and Good Character:

    Faith should be the first criterion for a meaningful

    friendship. Allah says, The believers, men and

    women, are Awliya (helpers, supporters, friends,

    protectors) of one another; they enjoin (on the

    people) al-Maroof (i.e. Islamic Monotheism andall

    that Islam orders one to do), and forbid (people)

    from al-Munkar (i.e. polytheism, disbelief of allkinds, and all that Islam has forbidden); they

    perform Salaat, and give the Zakaat, and obey

    Allah and His Messenger. Allah will have His

    Mercy on them. Surely, Allah is All-Mighty, All-

    Wise. [Soorah Tawbah (9): 71] Thus, friendship

    based on the correct faith aims towards

    supporting and encouraging one another towards

    the obedience of Allah. Its goal is much more

    sublime than the friendship that is done for

    worldly gain, and amongst its benefits is that it is

    a means to safeguard ones Aqeedah from being

    tainted with incorrect beliefs and practices.

    The Messenger of Allah said: 'Men are of two

    types, a man who is righteous, fearful of Allah and

    honorable to Allah, or a man who is vicious,

    miserable and insignificant to Allah, the

    Exalted,' [al-Muntakhab by Abd bin Humayd

    (793)]

    Thus, the best of people to befriend arethose who possess Taqwaa (fear of Allah) for,

    'Verily, the most honorable of you with Allah is

    that (believer) who has Taqwa.' [Soorah al-

    Hujurat (49): 13] and 'Allah loves those who are

    al-Muttaqin (those who possess Taqwa).' [Soorah

    Maryam (19): 63]

    Islam gives precedence to Taqwa in all

    matters, for example, in cases of marriage while

    choosing a life partner, Allah's Messenger

    stressed upon choosing a pious spouse, he said,

    'A women is married for four (reasons); herwealth, her nobility, her beauty and her piety.

    Choose the pious one and you will be successful.'

    [Saheeh al-Bukharee (7/27)] He also said, 'If a

    man, whose practice of the religion satisfies you,

    asks you for your daughter in marriage, you

    should marry them; otherwise, there will be

    corruption on the Earth.' [At-Tirmidhee]

    Choosing a friend is as important as choosing a

    life partner, therefore the wise choice are the

    (those who possess Taqwa). Ali

    advised, 'Befriend righteous people, for they are a

    good resource to use in this and the last life. Have

    you not heard the statement of the people of the

    Fire, 'Now we have no intercessors. Nor a close

    friend (to help us). (2): 175' [al-Ihya]

    Benefits of accompanying righteous people

    are numerous, amongst which is improving one's

    religion. As people are always found to be

    competitive within friends, associating with

    righteous individuals inspires competing them in

    righteous deeds, thus expanding the scope of

    performing righteous deeds and perfecting thereligion.

    Consider the example of the Sahabah ,

    they were only second in righteousness to Allah's

    Messenger , because they were so close to the

    Prophet - the most pious. Also, a number of

    narrations show that the Sahabah would

    compete each other in performing righteous deeds

    and achieving high ranks with Allah. For

    instance, Umar said, 'The Messenger of Allah

    ordered us to give charity at a time when I had

    some money. I said to myself, 'This day, if ever, Iwill be ahead of Abu Bakr .' I brought half of my

    money and the Messenger of Allah asked me,

    'What have you left for your family?' I said, 'A

    similar amount.' Abu Bakr brought all he had and

    the Messenger of Allah asked him, 'What have

    you left for your family?' He said, 'I left for them

    Allah and His Messenger .' So, I said to myself, 'I

    will never compete with you again.' [Abu Dawood]

    It is necessary that the friends you choose havegood character and possess Islamic morals and

    etiquettes. Allah, the Exalted, has encouraged

    His slaves in the Qur'aan to associate with those

    who have good characteristics. Allah says, 'O you

    who believe! Fear Allah and be with those who are

    true (in words and in deeds).' [(9): 119]

    It is essential that those whom you choose

    as friends recognize and respect the limits of

    Allah. For example, they should understand the

    Islamic etiquettes of speaking and language, for

    sometimes talks among friends can go beyond

    bounds, like one may be involved in sins like

    Gheebah (backbiting), nick-naming, slandering,

    etc. which are generally considered to be very

    insignificant, but can have disastrous affect on

    one's Hereafter. The Messenger of Allah said,

    'Beware of sins which are treated as being minor;

    just like a people who encamp in the center of a

    valley, so someone brings a stick of firewood and

    someone else brings a stick until they are able to

    bake their bread. Likewise, sins which are treated

    as being minor and for which the person is taken

    to account will destroy him.' [(Saheeh) MusnadAhmad (5/331) and others] It is related that the

    Muttaqoon

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    Messenger of Allah was once passing through

    one of the graveyards of Medina or Makkah; he

    heard voices of two persons who were being

    tortured in their graves. The Prophet said,

    'These two person are being tortured, (but) not for

    a major sin.' He further added, 'Yes. Indeed, one of

    them never saved himself from being soiled with

    his urine while the other used to go about with

    calumnies (to make enmity between friends).'[Saheeh al-Bukharee (1/215)]

    The importance of good character is also

    manifest in the Hadeeth of Allah's Messenger

    who said, 'Nothing will be heavier on the Day of

    Resurrection in the scale of the believer than good

    manners. Allah hates one who utters foul or

    coarse language.' [At-Tirmidhee] The Messenger

    of Allah was asked about the deed, which will be

    foremost to lead a man to Jannah, he replied,

    'Fear of Allah and the good character.'...' [At-

    Tirmidhee]

    One's associates and

    surrounding should help him remember Allah

    because man is ordered to remember Allah at all

    times. Remembrance of Allah strengthens the

    slave's bond with His Lord and prevents his heart

    and mind from being heedless of divine guidelines

    and limits. Abu Hurayrah reported the

    Messenger of Allah saying, 'If anyone sits in a

    gathering where he does not remember Allah, he

    will bring grief upon himself (on the Day of

    Resurrection), and he who lies down in a place

    where he does not remember Allah, will bring

    grief upon himself (on the Day of Resurrection).'

    [Abu Dawood]

    The superiority of the remembrance of

    Allah was explained by Allah's Messenger , who

    said: 'The example of the one who remembers his

    Lord, in comparison to the one who does not

    remember his Lord, is that of a living creature

    compared to a dead.' [Saheeh al-Bukharee]

    I n th e pr esen t ti me of t rial s an d

    tribulations, it is very easy to be caught up in

    worldly affairs. Allah warns His slaves againstassociating with those who busy themselves in

    worldly pleasures and give no heed to the

    remembrance of Allah. Allah says, 'And keep

    yourself patiently with those who call on their

    Lord, morning and afternoon, seeking His Face

    and let not your eyes overlook them, desiring the

    pomp and glitter of the life of the world; and obey

    not him whose hearts We have made heedless of

    Our Remembrance, one who follows his own lust

    and whose affairs (deeds) have been lost.' [(18):

    28] The Qur'aan informs us that on the Day of

    Judgment there will be people who will bite their

    hands in regret that they were lead astray

    because of choosing wrong people as their friends,

    they would say, 'Woe to me! Would that I had

    never taken so-and-so as a friend! He indeed led

    me astray from the Reminder (this Qur'aan) after

    it had come to me.' [Soorah al-Furqan (25): 27]

    Whereas, those who help one another in piety,

    truth and remembrance of Allah will surely

    benefit each other in the Hereafter. Allah will

    grant them His Shade on the Day of Judgment

    and He says, 'Friends on that day will be foe's one

    t o a not her e xce pt A l -Mut t aq o on ( pio us,

    righteous).' [Soorah az-Zukhruf (43):67]

    Remembering Allah:

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    A Muslim's primary concern before choosing friends should be to seek the Pleasure of Allah in the

    friendship. The Messenger of Allah said, 'Whoever loves for Allah, and hates for Allah, gives for Allah

    and withholds for Allah, has completed his faith.' [Abu Dawood]

    Friendship that is based upon the sincere purpose of seeking Allah's Pleasure brings about the

    love of Allah for the slave. Abu Hurayrah narrated that Allah's Messenger said, 'A man went to visit

    a brother of his in another village. Allah sent an Angel to wait for him on the road. When the man came,

    the Angel asked him, 'Where do you intend to go?' He said, 'I am going to visit a brother of mine who lives

    in this village.' The Angel asked, 'Have you done him any favor (for which you are now seeking

    repayment)?' He said, 'No, I just love him for the sake of Allah.' The Angel told him, 'I am a messenger to

    you from Allah, sent to tell you that He (Allah) Loves you as you love your brother for His sake.' [Saheeh

    Muslim]

    From the benefits of such a virtuous friendship is that on the Day of Judgment, when, 'the sky

    will be like the boiling filth of oil (or molten lead, etc.) andthe mountains will be like flakes of wool. And no

    friend will ask of a friend.' [(70): 8-10] 'That day shall a man flee from his brother. And from his mother

    and his father, and from his wife and children.' [(81): 34-37] 'Allah, the Exalted, will declare on the Day of

    Resurrection, 'Where are those who loved each other for the sake of My Grace? This Day, I shall shadethem under My Shade, when there is only My Shade.' [Saheeh Muslim]

    Friendship for Allah's Sake