NEW

THINGS

G L I M M E R S O F W I S D O M F O R

F I G U R I N G O U T W H AT ’ S N E X T

All rights reserved by MOPS International. MOPS Mentors and Leaders have permission

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reproducing content, in whole or in part, for use during a MOPS meeting or discussion. All

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contribution. This content may not be used for purposes outside of a MOPS meeting or an

affiliated meeting or gathering without the express written permission of the publisher.

MOPS International

2370 South Trenton Way

Denver, CO 80231

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Copyright © 2016 by MOPS International

TABLE OFCONTENTS

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7

8

5

13

15

17

19

21

24

26

29

31

33

35

40

Blessing

Others

Dear Fellow

MOMSnext Mom

Firsts and Lasts

From the

Editor’s Desk

Everyday

Heroes

The Big Kid

Connection

Celebrating

My Gifts

Grace

An Open Letter to

the Single Mom

A Walk in

the Woods

Sharing Your Gifts:

The What & the Who

The Beginning, the

Middle & the End

Beneath the

Surface

Shoot for

the Moon

Resources

Starry-Eyed

Sneak Peek

5

Welcome, mom friend!

We’re so glad you are a part of MOMSnext. MOPS started over 40 years ago as a community

of moms with infants and toddlers in tow who needed a break and a chance to connect. Over

the years, moms like you realized that once the kids are in school, the need for friendship and

encouragement doesn’t end. MOMSnext is the answer – a community of moms with kiddos

in elementary school and beyond who gather to laugh, learn and grow as women and moms

alongside each other. After all, mothering doesn’t get easier the minute you retire the pacifiers

and bottles; the issues our kids face on the playground and in the classroom are real, and our

challenges as the moms of school-aged kids grow with them.

The devotions in this book were written by women like you – moms who love their children to

the moon and back, and sometimes feel frustrated when those same little darlings talk back

or leave a trail of shoes in the entry or “forget” to bust out the soap on bath night. It is a relief

for many moms when the kids finally become more independent. You may have more time on

your hands once your kids are in school. Time to dream, plan and remember goals or passions

you set aside when you welcomed a child into your life. If you find yourself asking, “What’s my

next?” This book is for you.

Thus says the Lord who made the earth, the Lord who formed it to establish it … Call to

me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know.

— Jeremiah 33:2-3

Join us in choosing wonder, hope and kindness in the midst of this Starry Eyed mothering journey.

FROM THEEDITOR’S DESK

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There is so much to look forward to as you watch your children grow, so many adventures yet

to be experienced and so much to talk about.

We’re saving you a seat at the table.

Sincerely,

Liz Sagaser, Editor

P.S. We’ve included a bonus just for you: the introduction and first chapter of Starry-Eyed

by Mandy Arioto, the 2016-17 MOPS theme book! We hope you are as excited about this

wonder-filled book as we are.

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7

I can hardly believe I am the mom of a graduating (second try’s the charm) kindergartener

and an almost fourth grader. When I entered MOPS my Mentors told me, “Time will fly.

Cherish it.” You can’t quite believe it in the moment – the hours and days seem too pass so. very.

slowly. But then it happens: Almost overnight, your children no longer need you to get them

dressed; they learn to read, write and pack their own lunches. Suddenly, these little people of

ours come into their own, truly becoming individuals.

MOPS carried me through those early years: through sleep deprivation, tantrums, hospital

stays for my son; through rediscovering Jesus. The early season of motherhood is over and a

new one has begun. The stage has been set, I have been well prepared and now is the time to

step into thriving!

God is calling you, he is calling me, he is calling each of us to our next adventure. It is time to

give back, to step up, to step out. It is time to thrive, and thriving carries a whole new set of

opportunities as the mom of school-aged kids.

You and me, your friends in your MOMSnext group and the woman next to you in the little

league bleachers – we are world changers! So I’m wondering, friend, with all the hard-won

wisdom you’ve gained as a woman and mother, what will you do next?

I can’t wait to watch you shine!

With love,

Kelli Smith // MOPS International Lead Generation Strategist and MOMSnext Leader

DEAR FELLOW MOMSNEXT MOM

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When my kids were born, I meticulously wrote their ‘firsts’ in their baby books:

First smile.

First tooth.

First food.

First step.

But no one warned me about the lasts of motherhood:

Last time she asked me to push her on the swing.

Last time I threw all the kids in the bathtub together.

Last night she woke up for the midnight feeding.

Last time I held him while he fell asleep.

The phases of our children’s youth end without warning, and we don’t even know they’ve

ended until we look back. We realize that book we read every. single. night. now lies lonely on

the bookshelf. We don’t have to pour a glass of milk each morning, because suddenly he can

reach the glasses and lift the gallon jug with ease. When did it end? How did we miss it?

Motherhood is a constant balance of looking back and straining forward, isn’t it? No matter

how much we recorded or how diligent we were to savor each moment of their first little years,

they slip by in the blink of an eye. The baby shampoo is replaced with Axe Body Spray, and

the tiny jars of baby food turn into giant boxes of cereal that disappear in one afternoon snack

session (and mysteriously end up back on the pantry shelf empty to fool a hungry sibling).

FIRSTSANDLASTS

B Y S A R A H D A M A S K A

M O M O F 4

S A R A H D A M A S K A . C O M

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In 1965, The Byrds recorded a song you’ve probably heard:

To everything

turn, turn, turn

There is a season

turn, turn, turn

And a time to every purpose under heaven

A time to be born, a time to die

A time to plant, a time to reap

A time to kill, a time to heal

Now that you’re humming along, did you know the origin of these words is not The Byrds, but

the Bible? Ecclesiastes 3 begins by listing seasons of life, exclaiming that every activity under

heaven has an appointed time and purpose. And try as we might to hold on to those phases,

we know quite well we have little or no control of time as we watch our little ones grow into

actual people.

Of course, we don’t need The Byrds or the author of Ecclesiastes to remind us of this truth

because moms – especially those of us standing on the edge of the chasm that takes us from

Mother of Littles to Mother of Bigs (which quickly becomes Mother of Teenagers and eventually

*gasp* Grandmother) – know the time we have to instill truth and character into our children

is fleeting.

When I’m tempted to long for the days of sweet chubby cheeks and sticky hugs, I remember

these words a few verses later:

Yet God has made everything beautiful for its own time. He has planted eternity in the human

heart, but even so, people cannot see the whole scope of God’s work from beginning to end.

—Ecclesiastes 3:11

While there’s certainly nothing wrong with looking back with nostalgia, I want to be the mom

who looks forward with anticipation. We have a front row seat as we watch our children become

who God created them to be. We have the privilege to listen and discipline and cultivate their

gifts and abilities. We get to help plant hope for eternity in their hearts. If we cling to the past

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What do you love most about the phase of motherhood you are in right now?

What are you looking forward to in the next phase?

What specific ways could you pray for each of your children today?

How is God cultivating eternity in your heart?

Q U E S T I O N S F O R

P E R S O N A L R E F L E C T I O N

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season, we miss out on what God is doing now: preparing our children to change the world

and making them beautiful in his time.

There will certainly be hard, hard seasons to come, but we must be diligent in looking forward

to the beauty God is ripening in our children (and in us) as we usher them from one phase to

the next.

11

God has given each of you a gift from his great variety of spiritual gifts. Use them well to serve

one another. — 1 Peter 4:10

I don’t really consider myself a writer. Even though I’ve been writing for almost four years. Even

though people often tell me my words have touched them, uplifted them or spoken to them.

Even though I feel unsettled if I’m not writing. Even though I’ve been asked to write things for

other people.

Nevertheless, God saw it fit to give me the gift of sharing a message through my words.

I stumbled upon my gift for writing in the fall of 2012. My children, in second grade and

kindergarten at the time, came home with writing samples from a new curriculum their school

implemented. Their writing was good. Like, it-really-blew-me-away good. I had been feeling

a nudge but I wasn’t sure whether it was God or me doing the nudging. I thought to myself, “If

my kids can write like this, surely I can write too.” It was then that I started my blog.

I write on a variety of topics: my faith, parenthood, being a single mom, my chickens and

anything else that is on my heart. I haven’t always posted on my blog consistently but I am

still writing.

Even to this day, after doing this for almost four years, I still second-guess myself. I still question

if anyone is actually reading the words I pen. I feel anxious inside when I post something for

the world to read. I get edgy and antsy when I haven’t written in a while. I get frustrated when

I can’t find the time to write, or the words to speak what’s on my heart.

I believe in the core of my being that all of these feelings are indications I’m living out my

calling; that I’m pursuing my God-given gift. The unsettled feeling I have when I can’t clear my

mind to put pen to paper (or computer screen) to share my words is all the confirmation I need

that writing is a gift given to me by the Holy Spirit.

BLESSINGOTHERS

B Y M I C H E L L E N E H R I G - S H U L T H E I S

M O M O F 3

M I C H E L L E N E H R I G . C O M

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It is truly an honor that God would think enough of me to bestow this gift upon me. Rather than

keeping it to myself, I want to use this gift to reach others for him. The verse above reminds

us we are to use our gifts well, in order to serve one another. I use my gift to serve others by

sharing my story. Blessing others with our unique gifts is one of the best ways we can honor

God.

What are your unique gifts or talents?

How can you use these gifts to serve or bless others?

If you don’t know what your gifts are, is there something that moves you to your core?

That’s probably your passion — and your gift.

Don’t shy away from pursuing your God-given gifts. Celebrate your gifts. Embrace

them. Feed them. Then watch God work mightily!

Q U E S T I O N S F O R

P E R S O N A L R E F L E C T I O N

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You are a hero. Did you know that? In the eyes of your lovelies, you hang the moon and the

stars, the sun and the clouds. You — in your ponytail and yoga pants, pondering that evening’s

dinner menu or how to solve the laundry dilemma or perhaps what to call your first novel or

how to counteract climate change – are your children’s superhero.

As a mom it doesn’t always feel that way though, does it? As the mother of a newborn we

wonder if we will ever get caught up on sleep. As the mother of toddlers we despair over the

terrible twos. The school years may be fraught with schoolyard drama, classroom challenges

and the bigger attitude that sometimes accompanies bigger kids. Some days we wonder if we

will survive the terrible, horrible, no-good, very bad day that started at 6:30 a.m. and doesn’t

seem to have an end in sight. We wonder if we will avoid the 4 o’clock witching hour. And we

wonder how we will find the strength to wake up and do it all over again the next day.

May I offer you this? Keep persevering. You are seen and you will reap good things.

So let’s not get tired of doing what is good. At just the right time we will reap a harvest of

blessing if we don’t give up. — Galatians 6:9

It’s impossible to make it through our mothering years without feeling exhausted and weary

at times, but there is a difference between physical exhaustion and spiritual exhaustion. The

Lord wants us to meet one-on-one with him, but also to be carried by him throughout our day

and to listen for his voice in the everydayness of our everyday. This is how our spiritual strength

feeds our physical strength.

I will never forget the day when I was so depleted of strength and energy I wondered if my

kids would be better off without me as their mama. I was not the hero but the inadequate-to-

the-task villain, or so I thought. In my despair I heard the Lord whisper to me, “I see you my

daughter, you are loving your kids for me, you are caring for them for me, and I am singing

over you. Listen for me in your everyday.”

EVERYDAYHEROES

B Y J E S S I C A V A N R O E K E L

M O M O F 4

W E L C O M E G R A C E . C O M

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When you hear their voices calling for you, hear the echo of the Lord calling you to himself. He

calls us by name and longs to know us.

When you are asked to sing the same lullaby or read the same story over and over again, see

it as God asking you to sing to him. He loves our praises.

When you have to repeat yourself for the third time and you begin to wonder whether your kids

need a hearing test or just an attitude adjustment…

Think of how the Lord gently reminds us of his love over and over.

Hearing God’s voice in the everydayness of life is a step in going deeper in our walk with him.

And when we go deeper with him, we find the strength to make it through our everyday. He

becomes your superhero so you can be your kids’ hero.

Do you see yourself as a hero? Why or why not?

What can you do to establish (or re-establish) a one-on-one connection with the

Lord? (devotional, bible reading plan, prayer, memorization)

When do you hear God’s voice in your everyday? What can you do to become a

better-tuned listener for his voice?

Q U E S T I O N S F O R

P E R S O N A L R E F L E C T I O N

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3

15

Start children off on the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from

it. — Proverbs 22:5

It hit me one day like a ton of bricks: It was a week after the birth of my third baby, still at the

helpless newborn stage, when I realized for the first time that parenting actually gets more

difficult as my children age — not easier.

Maybe it was the drastic contrast between having a newborn and a 7-year-old at the same

time that made this realization so blatantly obvious. My 7-year-old son was just entering the

stage where he was becoming much more independent and new parenting challenges were

arising.

For a child’s first five years, they are fairly dependent on mom. They are often more cooperative

at this stage, doing what you tell them, happily toddling along in your footsteps, none the wiser

to the big wide world awaiting them.

Then age 5 hits. Beginning in kindergarten, they become more independent each day. What

was previously an easy compromise turns into your own personal civil war battle.

As their age progresses, the things that seemed so difficult a few short years before – the temper

tantrums, the sleepless nights, even potty training – now seem like a welcome alternative.

You see, the older a child becomes, the bigger the situations become that they will encounter

and you will parent them through. Encouraging good friend choices and continuing to follow

God becomes a larger, scarier reality. It’s no longer about whether or not you can make it

through Target without a meltdown.

THE BIGKID CONNECTION

B Y A L I C I A H U N T E R

M O M O F 3

T U R Q U O I S E G R A C E . C O M

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The older your child gets, the more important and impactful are their choices.

So how do we handle this? How do we make sure our children come out on the other side still

leading a life we, as their mothers, are proud of?

There is no guarantee our children will make all the right life decisions. In fact, they probably

won’t, and you wouldn’t want them to miss out on the opportunity to learn from minor mistakes

anyway. Here are some of the things I do as a mom to point my kids in the right direction, and

to encourage them to continue on the path God intends for them.

Pray for them. Tell your children when and why you pray for them. Through your example they

will learn to turn to God for everything and to value prayer as a part of their daily lives.

Stay engaged. Just because they’re older now doesn’t mean they need us any less. In some

ways they need us more. Ask questions about their day, volunteer in their classroom and get to

know their friends. Stay interested and in the loop with their life.

Be an example. Live your life how you would expect your older children to live theirs. They may

be older and more independent, but they are still watching, desperately seeking guidance

from you.

We all want what’s ultimately best for our children. Inspiring kids to make thoughtful choices

starts with us.

How do you stay engaged with your older child?

What can you do to live your life as an example?

How did your parent(s) engage with you as a child? What worked and what didn’t,

from your perspective? What could you do differently?

Q U E S T I O N S F O R

P E R S O N A L R E F L E C T I O N

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3

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Over the years, I have become quite adept at purposefully not talking about my gift for

writing. I do not deny I can write. I just avoid bringing it up, sometimes even to my friends.

Other people mentioning it? No problem.

Me understanding my gift? Done.

Taking brave steps toward where my gift can lead? Totally there.

But telling people about my gift to celebrate it in the everyday? Not even.

Because that would be boastful. Selfish. Prideful.

A wise friend pointed out the bleeding lie of my belief.

James 1:17 says, in part, “Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the

Father.” They are God-ordained.

My kids, husband, job, car, house are all things I name good and perfect gifts from above. I

have zero reservations telling random people at the grocery store about them. I have proudly

showed them pictures, handed them my business card.

Ironically, I chose to receive these gifts. I chose my husband, chose to have kids, chose to take

this job. My own self.

I did not choose my talent. It was invested in me, woven into my very being, specifically chosen

for me.

CELEBRATING MYGIFTS

B Y S A R A B R U N S V O L D

M O M O F 2

F I N D T H E L O V E L Y . C O M

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The Father gave me this gift for the same reason I give one of my kids a gift: for their use and

enjoyment, and to know they are loved. My heart rejoices when my kids tell their friends about

their new gift. My heart breaks when they decline to ride their new bikes or never wear the

jeans it took me three stores to find in their sizes. I pour so much love into the gifts I give to my

children, why would they cast them aside? Why wouldn’t they tell all their friends about them?

How much more does the Father’s heart break when we don’t acknowledge his gifts to us?

To shove my gift to the side and convince myself mothering, wife-ing or working is, should and

will always be a more valuable use of my celebration is to continue to believe the lie.

If I celebrated my gift for writing at least as much as I did the gift of my kids, I would never stop

finding opportunities to bring it up in conversation. I would Instagram the heck out of it. And

in so doing, I would bring honor and joy to the Giver.

Every mention of my gift would be a little thank-you note to him. This gift I did not choose

would be the one I celebrate the loudest.

And there is nothing selfish about that.

How have you avoided celebrating your gifts?

What keeps you from celebrating?

What does celebrating mean to you?

How will you begin to celebrate, to acknowledge the wonder of the gifts God has

given?

Q U E S T I O N S F O R

P E R S O N A L R E F L E C T I O N

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But He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”

Therefore, I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest

on me. — 2 Corinthians 12:9

This past week a friend brought me a beautiful framed picture of the word “Grace.”

She said, “You’re always talking about how we, as women, should give each other grace and

love – so I thought this was perfect for you.” It so touched my heart that I started crying. Later

I wondered, “Do I really say that a lot? What does that mean?”

From the time we get married and have kids until the kids are gone (and sometimes beyond),

we women subconsciously try to outdo each other. Especially as mothers! If we let God use our

weakness and those times we feel not good enough, he tells us his power will rest on us if we

let his grace be sufficient.

I believe if we surround ourselves and others with grace and give it abundantly, we will see God

do works through us and our children that we never dreamed possible. When you have those

days (and we all do!) that you just can’t put on makeup, get dressed in something besides

sweats, get the kids dressed in matching clothes, AND manage to make it through the day …

Those are the times when we need abundant grace and love from other mothers and women.

Let God’s grace be sufficient and learn to be okay with weakness. This world is not a perfect

place and God doesn’t measure us by our ability to achieve perfection. It is in our weakest, less-

than, dressed-in-sweats-and-hair’s-a-mess moments that his power is made perfect.

I’m saving up grace for you, sister. I hope you’ve got some for me too.

GRACE B Y C I N D I B O S W E L L

M O M O F 2

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Describe an experience when another mom has extended grace to you and it has

made all the difference in your day.

Think of a time when your strength has not been enough for the challenges of your

day, but God’s grace has been sufficient and you experience his grace being sufficient.

Watch for opportunities to avoid trying to ‘outdo’ another mom, but rather to extend

grace and love to her. Do it!

Grace grows – but it has to start somewhere. How would you feel about extending

grace to those around you, even if you don’t receive it in return? What might that look

like? Are you willing to give grace and love with no guarantee of reciprocity?

Q U E S T I O N S F O R

P E R S O N A L R E F L E C T I O N

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Dearest Soloer,

Going solo is a roller coaster, isn’t it? You may find yourself crying behind the bathroom door,

shut away so your children won’t see your tears. Sometimes you sit through conversations with

your married friends and rejoice you haven’t lost a wink of sleep because you don’t share a bed

with a snoring, farting fellow human. Then 20 minutes later you murmur desperate prayers to

God above that he would bring a companion to hold your empty hand.

In the five years I’ve been out of my marriage, I’ve experienced seasons I feel put together and

seasons I’m just a mess. Over time I have claimed four biblical principles that ease the motion

sickness of flying solo:

Do not be anxious about anything. Instead, in every situation, through prayer and petition with

thanksgiving, tell your requests to God. — Philippians 4:6

I pray. A lot. Every day. Sometimes every hour. I pray first thing in the morning and they are

the final words I say while I’m going to sleep. I have created a quiet, secluded prayer space

where I pray and read the Bible every day. During my daily time of prayer and Bible reading,

God has truly become my most steady companion, reminding me even as I parent my boys

without a partner, I’m not going through life alone.

Let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up

meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the

more as you see the day approaching. — Hebrews 10: 24-25

AN OPENLETTERTO THESINGLE MOM

B Y L O R I E M E R Y

M O M O F 2

A S O F T P L A C E T O L A N D

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God has placed me in an incredible community of women who love God and love each other

so well. I started a small group for other single moms and have found a sense of greater

purpose in this small community of women just like me. I always have a friend to call on. I find

so much companionship in having people I can lean on, and have found healing in being a

support for others when they are in a difficult season.

In his grace, God has given us different gifts for doing certain things well. — Romans 12: 6-8

I entered singlehood having no idea what I was great at, what I was created for, or the ways

God has gifted me. Through a number of different books, tools and exploration, God has been

so faithful to reveal the beautiful and unique ways he created me. God has shown me dreams

and desires to reach for, and I have been steeped in a sense of daily purpose.

Then the Lord God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper

fit for him.” — Genesis 2:18

Reluctantly, I eventually stepped off the spinning ride of dating. Dating - like the whirling

teacups at Disneyland, both thrilling and nauseating - has kept me going in circles and off the

path to a better ride. It seems counterintuitive to stop dating if what I desire is a companion,

but I’ve been stuck going round and round trying to be someone I’m not just to get approval

and attention. I can’t begin to tell you the freedom I have experienced by trusting God will lead

me to a helper fit for me, when the time is right.

Single mothering is filled with ups and downs. But incorporating prayer, being surrounded by a

support team, knowing my purpose and trusting God with my love life makes the steep climbs

and fast dips more exhilarating and less scary. With God by our side, we never have to step

into the solo line alone.

2323

Which one of these four biblical principles is most challenging for you? Why?

In your work or free time, are you doing what you love, what you know God created

you for?

How has dating been a challenge? How has dating been a blessing?

Read 1 Corinthians 7:7-9 about being single. Do Paul’s words give you relief or

disappointment?

Q U E S T I O N S F O R

P E R S O N A L R E F L E C T I O N

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You make known to me the path of life; in your presence there is fullness of joy; at your right

hand are pleasures forevermore. — Psalm 16:11

Have you ever gone on a hike in the woods? Some trails are wide, straight and clear. Others

are narrow, twisty and less traveled. If you’re not paying attention, you may lose your way.

I have been on this motherhood “hike” for awhile, and have come to a trail that splits off and

leads many directions. Maybe you’re in a similar place: the kids are a little older and a little

more self-sufficient. This place feels like a hard-won miracle, but you find yourself asking, “Now

what?”

For the first time in a long time, I feel ready and available for greater adventure and deeper

calling. As my children get older, I find myself with more time to reflect and more space to

breathe as I explore what God and my heart might be leading me to next.

The path before motherhood was a straight one. From an early age, I knew exactly what I

wanted to do, and everything seemed to line up in that direction. Then hopes and dreams led

me to a twisty, unknown trail: Motherhood. The trek has brought me through peaks of joy and

valleys of exhaustion. I have carried three children along with me, learned about my strengths

and weaknesses and have discovered beauty through it all. Many times I thought I was lost,

only to be found by a more experienced hiker who nourished me with wisdom and warmed me

with a hug before setting me back on my course. I have bravely stepped forward, one foot in

front of the other, sometimes in small steps with big prayers. With God’s help I have preserved,

developed character and witnessed the power of hope. Hope whispers to me louder than ever

before, and my heart races with possibilities.

I am not the same person who started on this journey years ago. Through grace, mercy

A WALKIN THEWOODS

B Y S H A N N A C R O W E L L

M O M S N E X T C O O R D I N A T O R

E M B R A C E E N T H U S I A S M . N E T

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and a lot of tears and sweat, I am a better, stronger version of me. Goodness and wonder

have softened the landscape and allowed me to experience unconditional love, which has

transformed me from the inside out. Qualities of my old self remain, but under pressure they

have been polished and refined, making them more precious and stronger than ever before.

My sense of adventure is calling me to boldly step out in faith with a greater presence of love in

my community. My curiosity and desire to learn has brought me to the idea of starting a new

degree. My work ethic has taught me I can push myself through uncomfortable and unpleasant

conditions for the good of others. These qualities were woven in me before I was born. With

God and my pack filled with experience and rediscovery, I am ready to tackle unknown trails

and summit higher peaks. I know the views will be more beautiful and rewarding than I could

ever have imagined – just as the trail of motherhood has proven itself to be.

What has the “hike” through motherhood looked like for you? Has it been straight

and easy? Has it been narrow and difficult? How has this journey shaped you?

What wonderful things have you found on the trail of motherhood? How have those

encounters sparked a new interest or dream?

Identify three personal qualities that have gotten better or stronger due to motherhood.

How can you make those qualities shine brighter?

What summit do you hope to climb? What are your hopes and dreams for the future?

Can you identify an “experienced hiker” in your life? How might this seasoned woman

help you find your course and pursue your dreams?

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Maybe your life story looks similar to mine: Before kids came along, you had a pretty good

idea of what talents you have, what kind of work you enjoy doing, what kind of service

employed your gifts in a satisfying way. For me, the answer to a dozen yearnings in my heart

was teaching. This was my “thing.” What was yours?

And then … motherhood.

Suddenly, huge chunks of your attention, time and energy belonged to someone else. Your

“work” and “service” became more about survival than fulfillment. Older women would see you

with your little one in public and coo sweetly, “Oh, those days go by so fast!” and you would

think, “Are you crazy? These are the longest days of my life.”

Until, one day you realize things have shifted once again. Not only is there more space in your

home where the diapers and baskets of baby toys once sat, there’s also more room in your life

to give attention, time and energy to something else.

Like the work you used to love doing! Like the service that was so fulfilling! Like remembering

the person you used to be.

Have you traveled this road? I have. And I walked just a few more steps to find myself in a very

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frustrating place; trying to do the same things I had once done wasn’t working for me. There

wasn’t the same fulfillment. Something about having children caused a fundamental shift in

some of my perspectives. I would read a student essay and think, “Huh. It’s shocking to me how

I just don’t care about this homework.” My priorities had changed. My passions had shifted.

And I realized two important personal truths:

First, I am not the person I used to be. I am forever changed. That’s part of the gift of

motherhood. Maybe that’s obvious to you; I was a little slower to catch on.

But what did this mean about my talents and gifts? Had all of my “inner teacher” leaked out

during those MOPS years? Impossible ...

That’s when I realized a second important truth: My “what” had stayed the same. I love to

teach, it’s how I’m wired. What had changed was my “who.” Though my kids were now older,

they were still my priority, and my passion was to share my talents and gifts with them first. My

daughter and son — these are the two people I wanted to teach first.

This is not to say I don’t desire to work and serve with my gifts outside of our family. On the

contrary, the older they get, the more we branch out as a family and the more opportunities

God gives me (and us) to share of ourselves in our community.

But whether your “thing” is teaching or organizing, encouraging or being creative – don’t be

surprised if the desire of your heart is to offer them to your family first. There is great fulfillment

in this, and great joy for you all.

And if you are a woman who picks up where she left off before the kids came along, or you

find an entirely new passion to pursue now that your kids are a little more self-sufficient; that’s

ok too. God has blessed you with unique gifts. Now that the dust of early motherhood has

settled, it’s a great time to get out there and use them!

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What did you enjoy doing for work or fun before you became a mom?

How did your occupation or interests change after the kid(s) arrived?

Do you have more time to pursue career or personal interests now that the kid(s) are

older? What would it look like to invest time in your career or in a new (or old favorite)

pastime?

Who else in your family or community could benefit from the application of your

gifts?

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As a mother, you’ve probably experienced feeling inadequate at times. You may remember

when a toddler threw a fit in the store, and you wished you could hide behind a giant pack of

paper towels. As your kids have gotten bigger, you may feel stumped as you try to help them

with homework. I recall the frustrating realization that knowing how to do something was quite

different than being able to teach it to someone else! It may be that your child comes home

crying because she saw on social media that all of her friends got together and she wasn’t

invited.

As a mom, we all wish we could do this job perfectly; that we’d always have the answer; that

our fuse would be long; our patience would be bottomless and our laughter would be quick.

However, our day-to-day experiences can be quite the opposite. I find a lot of encouragement

in Philippians 1:6, which says, “And I am certain that God, who began the good work within

you, will continue his work until it is finally finished on the day when Christ Jesus returns.”

Look at the verbs in that verse: began, continue and finished.

Who began the work? God.

Who continues the work? God.

Who will finish the work? God!

He is active in the beginning, the middle and the end. We are never alone because he is right

beside us, helping us in all of our mothering moments. The good news continues in Philippians

2:13, which says, “For God is working in you, giving you the desire and the power to do what

pleases him.”

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I am amazed at God’s goodness towards us. He is excessively generous! He does the work in

us, and gives us the power and even the desire to cooperate.

Ephesians 1:19-20 tells us more about this power, “I also pray that you will understand the

incredible greatness of God’s power for us who believe him. This is the same mighty power that

raised Christ from the dead and seated him in the place of honor at God’s right hand in the

heavenly realms.”

This power is the greatest power imaginable. Can you even imagine the power God employs

to make a dead person live again? This verse tells us it is “God’s power for us who believe him.”

As soon as you become a believer in Christ, the Holy Spirit moves in. He is ever-present with

you, ready and able to help in all circumstances.

As you go about your mothering journey, remember that God isn’t finished with you yet, and

he isn’t finished with your kids yet, either. We are all works in progress. You can trust him with

everything, with all of your mothering moments, good or bad. Daily put your trust in this one

who deserves your trust, who is interested in your every moment, and who generously gives you

everything you need to be the mother he created you to be.

Which aspect(s) of parenting make you feel inadequate? Why?

As moms, we are often willing to accept our children as “works in progress.” What

would it look like to extend yourself the same grace as a mom?

There is so much potential in an unfinished work of art. What unfinished aspects of

your work as a mother offer you hope and something to look forward to?

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Behold, I will do something new, now it will spring forth; will you not be aware of it? I will even

make a roadway in the wilderness, rivers in the desert. — Isaiah 43:18–19

Just when I feel like I’ve got this mothering gig down, things change. Just months after my

babies, now 7 and 4, started sleeping through the night, they got teeth and started crawling.

Then they began walking, pulling my house apart and climbing in, on and out of anything

possible. They started throwing themselves on the floor when they didn’t get their way. Shortly

after, we started potty training, which in all honesty often made me want to throw myself on

the floor! Next came preschool and in the blink of an eye, it’s off to school.

It’s difficult going through so many changes in just a few years. Sometimes we mamas live

in survival mode and many of the days are hazy. I often didn’t realize how God was working

during those early years of my mothering. It’s in hindsight that I’m able to connect the dots.

I’ve come to realize through these years of transformation that God is growing my children,

and he’s also growing me. Just as children experience growing pains, we mothers experience

them as well. This constant wave of change challenges me. It tests me and stretches me in ways

I didn’t realize were possible. The testing and trying of my patience, energy and faith is not

comfortable. When I look at all I’ve learned along the way of my mothering journey, I see that

I’ve had a lot of maturing to do.

Every new season I encounter now begs me to ask these questions, “God, what new thing do

you want to do in me? What do you want to teach me?” To really know the answers, I have to

look below the surface.

Just as a flower seed transforms and begins to grow underground where no one can see, God

does the same thing in us. He’s working in us, beginning to do a new thing that we often aren’t

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aware of. We must slow down enough to seek him so we don’t miss it. Even on the hard days,

we must have faith that all of the changes and the growing pains we experience are necessary

parts of the process.

As we wait for what will spring forth during this new season, let’s trust that he’s working on

something beautiful. It’s exciting to see what he’ll do next.

How have you seen God bring forth something new in your journey as a mom?

How has part of your maturing as a mother been uncomfortable?

What new thing might God want to do in you during your current season?

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Being a stay at home mom was never really something I planned to do. After working full-time

for the first year after my son was born, I knew I needed to drop down to part-time. When our

daughter came along, childcare costs prevented me from working part time. Now I have been

a stay-at-home mom to three kids for 10 years!

As an “accidental” stay-at-home mom, I always assumed I would go back to work when my

youngest entered first grade. For years I have pondered the question, “What will I do with the

next chapter of my life once the 2016-17 school year rolls around?” The question was filled with

possibility, and I’ve dreamed of this next chapter of my life with joyous anticipation.

Then life happened … When the symptoms began, words like “Lupus” and “Rheumatoid

Arthritis” were thrown out, and the exhaustion became so acute I spent many hours a day

in bed. My dreams began to feel as unattainable as capturing the moon; far-fetched and

agonizingly impossible. Instead of, “What next?” I found myself asking, “What now?”

Many are the plans in a person’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails. — Proverbs

19:21

This led me to a new stage. The jobs I had dreamed of for years—children’s librarian or professor

or personal business owner—were no longer a good fit for my failing body. It was time to create

a new dream: What did I truly love doing that could be done when I physically felt able?

What activities would be fulfilling, but require more of my mind and less of my body? I had

to consider what kind of work would still allow me to be the mom I want to be. After much

thought, discussion and prayer, I felt led to write.

I’m one of those uber-practical people. A list making, all-sides-considered type. The first

discussion went a bit like this, “Seriously, God? I’m going to make money writing? Of all those

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who want to be writers, how many actually make a living at it? Shouldn’t I strive for something

a bit more … attainable?”

Many are the plans in a person’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails. — Proverbs

19:21.

So, I began to write. I joined a writer’s group. I began to dream again – a new dream

appropriate for a new set of circumstances. And you know what? I am secretly loving this

dream. Will I ever make a single dollar from this dream? Who knows? The important part for

me right now is to follow that small voice that is guiding my next step. Following that voice, and

conveying my inner most thoughts to the page, brings me peace and fulfillment in a way most

practical jobs never would have. Let the Lord’s purpose prevail!

If you really allowed yourself to dream, what would you do with the rest of your life?

What is holding you back from pursuing this dream? Which challenges are tangible

(health concerns, financial or time constraints) and which are perceived (fear of failure,

lack of knowledge about how to get started, lack of confidence)?

What does God have to say about your dream? If you haven’t shared this dream or

passion in your prayers, why not?s

What can you do today (or this week?) to take one step closer to achieving your

dream?

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