Negotiation: The Unspoken Language

Ken Baum, CFIRegional Loss Prevention Director

Contract Negotiation Similarities to Investigations

• Work with People• Work with People who are free to leave at

anytime• Work with People who want to disclose the

information they CHOOSE to disclose while protecting their own interest

• The goal is to develop factual information to make the best informed decision

• A decision is not reached until all facts are gathered

Contract Negotiation Differences to Investigations

• Criminal Investigations are typically unannounced interviews (no appointment required)

• Research on the suspect is not always available

• At the end of the day, someone will be going to jail (consequences are different)

Work With People

Characteristics of a good interviewer/negotiator?

• Patient• Non-judgmental• OPEN MINDED• Displays fairness• Shows Respect• Asserts Interest• Active Listener• Reads Behavior• Puts Self in the Place of Other Person

Room Setting

• Prepare and KNOW the room in advance

• Have enough “personal” space between each person

• One side or the other – but the decision maker needs to have a full view of the presenter if possible

Open Ended/Closed Ended Questions

• Closed Ended Question Examples– Any response that can be phrased as a “Yes” or “No”– Other closed ended questions –

“HOW WAS YOUR FLIGHT?”

“HOW ARE YOU?”

“HOW WAS LUNCH?”

• Open Ended Question Examples– Who, What, When and Why

Questions

• Within every response is a follow up question until the subject changes.

- Similar to the Human Resources STAR method (Situation, action, response), where one question may lead to another.

Establishing Rapport

• “What did you do last weekend?”

• “What did you think of yesterday’s game?”

• “It must have been some experience to be in St Louis during last year’s flood…”

Establish a Rapport

Humor

• Story about self

• Use of a recent news event – provided it isn’t too depressing

Establishing a Rapport

Signals of Rapport• Bodies naturally begin to match one

another in body position, breathing and even speech patterns.

• Nonverbal behaviors such as smiling, good eye contact, body orientation, mimicking posture and uncrossed legs and arms support the feeling of warmth and having “clicked” with the other person.

Establishing a Rapport

• They want to know what you need

• You need their help. Ask for it.– Example: “Thank you for coming to see us –

we need your help with identifying the best solution...”

Rules For Evaluating Behavior

THERE IS NO SINGLE BEHAVIOR SYMPTOM THAT IS ALWAYS INDICATIVE OF TRUTH OR DECEPTION.

• Evaluate against the population

• Evaluate against himself/herself – establish a behavioral norm

• Evaluate behavior in the context of the situation

• Be aware of YOUR behavior – Don’t express disbelief

Body Language

– Can be rehearsed, restrained and practiced– Noticeable changes occur as the room

changes (i.e.: who enters or leaves it)

Body Language

• Participative

Body Language

• Running Man

Body Language

• Interested

Body Language

• Soaking Up

Body Language

• Dominant

Body Language

• Cavalier

Body Language

• Critical

Manipulators

Manipulators include all those body movements in which one part of the body grooms, massages, rubs, holds, pinches, scratches or otherwise manipulates a body part.

In a negotiation, these types of movements have no real bearing as to whether or not the truth is being told, but may indicate a stall for an answer.

“Finger” Cues

• Hand over Mouth

• Hand on Chin

• Hand on Cheek

• Hand on Temple

• Hand to bridge of the nose

• Closed Fist

• Middle Finger

Verbal Behaviors

• Tone of Voice– High – anger/fear– Normal – Response– Low – Sadness or Shame

• Speed of Delivery– Louder/Faster – Anger, fear and excitement

Verbal Behavior

• Pauses– Pauses, along with the pitch of the voice are

verbal cues • Words Spoken

– Also known as the Freudian Slip or other speech habits, such as “ah” or “aaa” or “uhh” or repetition, “I, I, I mean really…” can indicate the need for further questioning

Verbal Manifestations

• “At this time…”

• “If I recall correctly…”

• “To the best of my knowledge…”

• Emphasize “Honestly” or “I swear to God”

Micro-expressions

• My definition: The true facial expression for the emotion being felt during the length of time that it takes for your brain to decide whether or not to conceal the truthful response. Roughly, a tenth of a second in duration.

The Truth is as Plain as Your Face

Eye Movement

Eye movement is not consistently relied upon to determine whether answers are truthful or not.

Eye Movement

Also known as “Neuro Linguistic Programming”

Eye Movement

Visually Constructed Images

Eye Movement

Auditory Constructed

Eye Movement

Feeling / Kinesthetic

Eye Movement

Visually Remembered Images

Eye Movement

Auditory Remembered

Eye Movement

Indicates Internal Dialog

Eye Movement

Seldom Used Tricks of the Trade

• Be Professionally Nice

• Ask For Help

• THANK during the presentation where appropriate

So what now?

• NEVER accuse anyone of being deceitful.

• Use the information to change the course of the negotiation.

Thank YOU!