Mediation Skills

Topics to be covered

1. What is Mediation?

2. Mediation Principles

3. Mediation Process

4. Active listening

5. Effective Questioning

6. Feedback

7. Reframing

8. Managing Anger

9. Separate Sessions

10. Summarizing

11. Reaching to Solution

12. Negotiations

13. Agreements

14. Monitoring

What is Mediation? Mediation refers to a third-party conflict

resolution process whereby people trained in mediation skills work with parties in conflict.

It aims to assist the parties in resolving the conflict through help facilitate communications between the parties.

The mediator may suggest solutions, but no solution shall be imposed on a party; the parties must agree before any compromise or solution shall take effect.

Mediation Principles

Voluntary Participation in Good Faith

Confidentiality

Safe Environment

Self Determination

Mediator Impartiality

Cultural Appropriateness

Harmless process

THE MEDIATION PROCESS

INTRODUCTIONSTORYTELLING

ISSUES and NEEDSPROBLEM-SOLVING

AGREEMENT

INTRODUCTIONS

Introduce Everyone Explain your role Explain the process Rules Confidentiality

STORYTELLING

Each person has a chance to tell their side of the story

Listen without interrupting Use active listening to provide feedback to

the speaker

Active Listening

• Attentive listening without interrupting.

• Attention focused on the speaker.• Maintain eye contact, use encouraging comments

• Convey empathy• Paraphrasing reflects both facts and feelings in your own words.

Effective QuestioningUse Open Ended Questions

Make sure questions don’t sound like accusations.

Probe for additional information by reflecting what the parties have said and then asking:

Can you tell me more about that?How ? When? Where? What else?

Clarify by asking questions to find out more about what they have said.

How did you feel about that?What was the problem?

Conflict Analysis Questions What is the conflict? (What is it all about?) Who are the (primary, secondary) parties

involved?, What are the (underlying) issues involved in

the conflict? How complex is the conflict? Is there one

focal point or are there many levels? How long has it been going on?

What is causing or has caused the conflict to occur?

What do the parties want? How do they see it being resolved?

Do the parties want the conflict resolved?

Feedback

When the speaker pauses, there is an opportunity for you as the neutral to confirm that you have been listening; you understand what has been said. This is called “Feeding Back”.

Feeding back is also a good way to check that your perception of what you think you heard/observed is accurate, as well as a way to validate for the speaker what he/she is feeling.

Feedback

• Repeat or paraphrase what the speaker has said (or displayed as unspoken feelings) Examples:

“So, when that incident happened, you felt like….”“It sounds like an important issue for you is how to deal with…”“What I think I’m hearing is that you really need….”“I can see that you really have strong feelings about that…”Note: A common sign that you’ve done this correctly is the speaker will not vigorously or respond, “yes, that’s right!”

Feedback

• Do not repeat what the speaker says verbatim. That will become annoying - paraphrase instead.

However, remain conscious of particular words that seem important to the speaker and use them, if appropriate, in your paraphrasing.

REFRAMING

Reframing is a special way of feeding back, and is one of the MOST important tools a third-party neutral intervener can use. It serves 3 important functions: 1) to restate what a party has said to capture the essence;2) remove negative overtones; and3) move the process forward.Reframing is also a way to translate a positional statement into a statement of interests or needs. 

REFRAMING

Example:A member of the XYZ says angrily, “She’s so irresponsible! We can never depend on her to show up for meetings on time.” Simple FEED BACK might be:“So…it really bothers you when she is not on time for meetings.”

While a REFRAMED response might be:“So…it is really important to you that members adhere to our established meeting schedules.”The difference is subtle…but important!

REFRAMING EXERCISE

Managing Anger in Mediation

It is important that you understand and manage anger, especially if you are being asked to intervene in a dispute as a neutral. Anger that is poorly managed…or not managed at all will likely:

Cause positions to become increasingly rigid; Lead to escalation (anger begets anger);and Cause parties to withdraw from the process all

together

Acknowledge the angerValidate the feelings Invite further talkReframe the contentDirect parties to talk only to the mediatorEnforce ground rulesCall time out.Use separate sessions.

Managing Anger in Mediation

Separate Sessions Mediators meet with each party separately

Try to equalize time Can be used if one party seems to be

uncomfortable, or is emotional

Helps with impasse

Parties can also request

Confidential

SUMMARIZING

Summarizing is used in case of major transitions in a conflict resolution or mediation session, such as after one party has told his/her story and before you turn to the other party.

When summarizing:• Hit the key points• Focus on the “interests” not the “positions”• Use neutral language but do not “sugar coat”• Ask for confirmation, e.g., “Do I have that right?”

REACHING TO SOLUTION

Brainstorm solutionsLook at issues and needs

Check for agreement Ask what each party would be willing

to do Clarify and restate

EXERCISE:ROLE PLAY - I

NEGOTIATION

The process of making joint decisions when the parties involved have different preferences.

NEGOTIATION STYLES

POSITION BASED NEGOTIATION (PBN)The theory of Position Based Negotiation or PBN is where each party’s gain is in proportion to the other party’s loss. This is referred to as the “FIXED PIE” concept and disputing parties naturally engage in this style of negotiation.

NEGOTIATION STYLES

INTEREST BASED NEGOTIATION (IBN)The theory of Interest Based Negotiation or IBN is that a “win-win” solution to the dispute (allowing both parties to have their interests met by the same settlement) is POSSIBLE. This is referred to as “EXPANDING THE PIE”

AGREEMENT

Review brainstormed solutions and check for agreement from both sides on all points.

Nail down the solutions.

Ask questions USING SIX HELPERS: WHO? WHAT? WHEN? WHERE? HOW? WHAT IF?

SPECIFY EXACTLY WHAT EACH PERSON WILL DO.

WRITING THE AGREEMENT

State the problem.

Write down what each person will do.

Have the disputants sign the agreement.

Remind the disputants that this is a contract.

EXERCISE:ROLE PLAY - II

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