MEAN GIRLSFacing Your BeautY turned Beast

BY HaYleY diMarco

D i s c u s s i o n G u i D e

Mean Girls—ugh! We’ve all seen ‘em. Most of us have been tormented by them

at one time or another. And if you’re reading this, i’ll bet it’s because you’re fed up and ready

to give Mean a fight!

Hayley DiMarco’s got your back. in the newly revised and expanded edition of Mean Girls, she

offers great advice about Mean Girls—and God’s approach to dealing with them. Her answers

won’t be easy, and she may just push you toward the hardest soul-searching you’ve ever done.

But in the end, you’ll be stronger than anything the Mean Girls can dish out.

And what could be better than one girl trying to stop Mean? A whole group of them! so grab

a copy of Mean Girls, rally a group for the cause, and print off this downloadable discussion

guide to get started on your very own quest to end Mean!

www.hungryplanet.net

o v e r v i e WThis discussion guide includes activity suggestions and discussion questions for four sessions, conveniently

mirroring the four primary sections in the book. nice how that works out—don’t you think? And we’ve even

thrown in a bonus girl-bonding session, for those of you who really want to be over-achievers!

Here’s a quick look at how your study will break down. (And just in case you’re the type who misses the

obvious, your crew should read the pages in parentheses to prep for each session listed.)

session one - introducing the Mean Girl (p. 9–40)

session TWo - Mean Girls: How to Handle Them (p. 41–104)

session THree - The spiritual side of Mean (p.105–34)

session Four - Fighting Mean (p. 135–72)

session Five - ending Mean: The Mean Girl Prayer Walk (p. 173–89)

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G e T T i n G s T A r T e D if you haven’t done it already, now’s the time to print off this discussion guide. read it over and pay special attention to the opening Activities for each session—some of them require that you gather a few materials ahead of time. (Don’t worry: we’re talking easy materials like paper and markers here, nothing a capable leader such as yourself can’t handle.)

Hand out copies of Mean Girls at least one week before your first group session and give the girls their first reading assignment. it’s hard to have a meaningful discussion when no one’s read the book! encourage your girls to get their reading done. Bribe them with chocolate, if necessary. or threaten to make them clean the youth room if they come unprepared. You get the idea, right?

G e T Y o u r s e l F c o n n e c T e D

need a little support as you lead a Mean Girls discussion group? check out Ifuse.com to swap ideas and encouragement with other adults and students who are tackling Mean.

l e A D e r T i P s

Are you a little nervous about leading a discussion group with teens? not sure how you’ll keep the discussion on track without killing all the fun? Don’t worry! As you get to know your group, you’ll get a feel for what works and what doesn’t. Here are a few common problems that leaders face, along with some approaches you can try:

iF Your GrouP seeMs quieT AnD uncoMForTABle, try spending a little more time with the opening activity before diving into the questions. or start your study time with a quick meal: it’s amazing how a few slices of pizza can open the channels of communication!

iF THeY Go oFF ToPic A loT, introduce the “parking lot”—a piece of paper/posterboard where you can jot down the off-topic idea. “Park” the idea there, and then return to it if there’s time at the end of the session.

iF no one resPonDs To quesTions riGHT AWAY, allow some extra silence. count to 10 before you say anything further. it may feel like forever, but that’s the idea: someone else may just decide to break the awkward silence before you do!

iF THeY oFFer sHorT AnsWers WiTH liTTle PersonAl reFlecTion, encourage deeper responses with follow-up questions like “Why do you say that?” “What does that mean to you, personally?” or “is there anything more God might be telling us here?”

iF THeY Don’T resPonD Well To oPeninG AcTiviTies, skip them! some groups prefer to dive right into the Bible study, and that’s just fine. You won’t hurt my feelings, honest.

iF one or TWo sTuDenTs Are DoinG All THe TAlkinG, try taking turns as you answer questions. or start inviting specific students into the conversation with questions like, “sara, i’d love to hear what you have to say about that, too.”

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s T u D e n T l e A D e r sFirst of all, kudos to you for stepping up and fighting Mean. Way to be a go-getter by starting this Mean Girls discussion group! Here’s the thing about leading a group of your peers: Without any adults around, you and your friends will probably feel really comfortable talking with each other. But if you’re not careful, your meaningful conversations about Mean Girls can easily get derailed into chatter about the perfect prom dress or that hottie in homeroom. not cool, right?

so how do you stay on track? As the leader, it’ll be your job to keep the conversation focused. You don’t need to morph into a dictator or anything. But you may want to try these tips:

sTeer THe creW BAck on course: if the conversation gets off track, try saying something like “i really want to talk about this later, but for now, let’s stick to our study questions.”

lisTen. Good leaders do a lot more listening than talking. They don’t feel the need to force their opinions on people or share their every thought. instead, make it your goal to learn what others think about the problem of Mean Girls.

iT’s okAY For PeoPle To DisAGree. if you feel your discussion turning into an argument, say “it doesn’t sound like either side is ready to change their mind on this, so let’s just agree to disagree and move on.”

BrinG GoD inTo iT. Pray about your Bible study group and ask God to make you a good listener and a strong leader.

A n o T e A B o u T M e A n

Before you begin this study, appraise your crew: Are there Mean Girl problems within your own group? some girls may have difficulty opening up if their “Mean Girl” is right in the room. others may act overly defensive if they feel like they’re being accused in front of the group. so be sensitive to your group dynamics, and try these ideas for getting the mean out:

keeP THe Focus: remind girls frequently that this Bible study isn’t about accusing others of Mean Girl behavior—it’s about changing their own hearts.

no DisresPecT: if a girl throws out disrespectful comments, address the issue immediately by reminding her to keep a respectful attitude.

in exTreMe cAses, divide a large study group into smaller groups. That way, you can split up the Mean Girl and the girl she’s been picking on, thus avoiding any potential blow-ups between the two.

recoGnize An oPPorTuniTY: This Bible study may be your opportunity to lovingly confront students who’ve been stuck in the “Mean cycle” and encourage them toward reconciliation. Just remember that any discussion of this sort should happen on an individual basis, not during group time.

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Student LeaderSREAd ThIS!

s e s s i o n o n e INTRoducING ThE MEAN GIRLoPeninG AcTiviTY: Mean Girl stories

suPPlies neeDeD: Pens, paper

Before the session, cut out small slips of paper—one per person in your group. Write “True” on half of the slips, and “False” on the other half. Fold the papers and place them in a basket or hat.

Pass out a pen and paper to each girl in the group. Tell them to write about a “mean girl” experience—in which they were either the mean girl or the mean girl’s victim. But before they begin, ask each girl to pull a slip of paper from the basket. Those who grab “True” slips need to write about a real-life experience that actually happened to them. Those who grab “False” slips need to make up a mean girl experience that sounds believable, but never actually happened.

Give everyone a few minutes to write their story. collect the stories and read each one aloud, asking the group to vote on whether they think the story is “True” or “False” before the storyteller reveals which one it was.

FolloW-uP quesTions: 1. What stories do you think were worse—the real ones or the made up ones?

2. For those who wrote “True” stories, did you find it easy or difficult to come up with a Mean Girl memory? Why?

3. in general, do you think it’s easier to remember incidents where you were the Mean Girl or where you were the Mean Girl’s victim? Why?

4. is it ever justifiable to be mean to someone? Why or why not?

Discussion quesTions: 1. Did you identify with anything in Hayley’s story on p. 11-15?

• Have you or a friend ever had a Mean Girl in your life? if so, how did she affect your everyday life?

• How do Mean Girls affect your view of yourself?

2. How much does our interest in boys play into the Mean Girl problem?

• Discuss this quote: “let’s face it, we need each other. Guys are great, sure, but they are different, and you can’t really connect with a guy the same way you can connect with a girl” (p. 13).

• How much do you think guys notice the Mean Girl cycle going on among girls? How do you think it impacts their view of women?

3. Why do you think Mean Girls end up being mean? What makes them that way?

• Agree or Disagree: every girl is mean at some point in her life.

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4. After taking the quiz on pages 18-19, where did you find yourself?

• Do you think it’s possible to be a Mean Girl victim, while also being a Mean Girl?

5. According to Hayley, what is the Mean Girl’s primary goal? (check out p. 26 if you’re having a blonde moment and need some help.)

• What’s the difference between a really Mean Girl and a girl who’s Mean For a reason?

• is it possible for you to change either kind of Mean Girl? Why or why not?

6. What are your first instincts and feelings when someone is mean to you?

• Why might feelings be a bad guide when it comes to handling Mean Girls?

7. Discuss this quote: “Warning: You might find some tips and tricks in here that make perfect sense, and you might try them and find that life gets a little bit better—but without faith in a God who can change lives and change hearts, any change will only be temporary.” (p. 16)

• Why is it impossible to solve Mean Girl problems without God involved?

• Have you ever tried to deal with a Mean Girl problem without having God in the picture? How did it work out?

8. Hayley says “The work you really have to do when faced with a Mean Girl is internal. Mean Girls can only hurt you as badly as you allow them” (p. 26). Do you agree?

• What kind of “internal” work might help you deal with a Mean Girl?

• in what ways could your reaction to Mean Girls end up just recycling the mean?

• in what ways could dealing with a Mean Girl make you stronger?

9. What reasons does Hayley offer for why God might allow a Mean Girl in your life? (check out p. 30-40 if you need some help.)

• Does looking at Mean Girls from a spiritual perspective change anything for you? if so, what?

• What lessons can God teach someone through a Mean Girl situation?

10. How do you feel about following God, even when he asks you to do something really hard?

• Do you think living out your faith will always feel good? Why or why not?

• should it be hard to live God’s way? isn’t being a christian supposed to be easy?

closinG PrAYer:Praying for someone is a wonderful way to prevent or break up Mean Girl problems. so start a tradition of praying for each other at the end of each Mean Girls study session.

If the girls aren’t comfortable sharing prayer requests out loud yet, invite them to write down their requests anonymously. Shuffle their papers and give one to each girl, asking her to say a silent prayer for that request. Wrap up the silent prayer with a brief spoken prayer by yourself or a volunteer.

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s e s s i o n T W o

MEAN GIRLS: how To hANdLE ThEMoPeninG AcTiviTY: overcoming the slam

suPPlies neeDeD: copies of the “overcoming the slam” Handout for each girl.

Have the girls divide into small groups of 2-3 for this activity. Hand out copies of the “overcoming the slam” handout and tell the groups to follow the instructions on their sheet. When the groups are finished, gather back together and share some of your responses to the questions. Mix in a few of these follow-up questions as you share:

FolloW-uP quesTions: 1. What’s a more difficult situation to be in: the victim, the friend of the victim, or the friend of the

Mean Girl?

2. When a Mean Girl does something hurtful, what do you think a victim’s first instincts/feelings tell them to do? Do you think they help you overcome the slam—or do they usually give in to the Mean Girl’s power trip?

3. in general, do you tend to stand up for others when you see them getting slammed? Why or why not?

Discussion quesTions: 1. in the past, how have you usually responded to Mean Girls?

• Do you think those responses have been good or bad? Why?

2. What is Jesus’ advice for handling Mean Girls? (check out the list on p. 43.)

• Does this advice make sense to you? Why or why not?

• Discuss this quote: “it’s a weak faith that only loves the one who loves them back” (p. 44). in what ways does loving a Mean Girl take strong faith?

3. Hayley says that “When God commands us to love, he wants us to take action in spite of what we are feeling” (p. 48).

• Agree or disagree: love is not a feeling, it is an action.

• Why do you think God defines love in terms of actions rather than feelings?

4. Do girls ever do loving things for selfish reasons? can you think of specific examples?

• Agree or disagree: Popular culture tends to show a selfish version of love.

• in what way does God’s idea of love require you to be less selfish?

hANd ouT

5. How does it honor God when you love your enemies?

• What are some practical ways to love Mean Girls?

6. is it possible to really “get even” with someone who’s hurt you? Why or why not?

• How can revenge make things worse?

• What does revenge do to you as a person?

7. Why is it so easy for girls to gossip? What makes it feel good?

• Do you think there’s such a thing as harmless gossip? Why or why not?

• How can you encourage your girlfriends not to gossip without coming across as “holier-than-thou”?

• What should you do when other girls are gossiping about you?

8. Do you find it easy or difficult to ignore girls who are being mean to you? Why?

• Why is it a good idea to hide your reactions and ignore a Mean Girl?

• can you think of any techniques that would help you stay calm and keep your anger or sadness hidden until you get home?

9. What were some of the most helpful ideas you read in this section for dealing with Mean Girls?

• Would you add any ideas to the ones in the book?

10. How do girls sometimes use compliments as a way of being Mean? can you think of an example?

• Why do you think girls respond to compliments by saying something negative about themselves? is this a healthy thing?

• What’s a healthy way to give and receive compliments?

11. Why do shy girls make easy targets for Mean Girl?

• is it wrong to be shy? Why or why not?

• How does shyness affect a girl’s ability to obey God’s commands?

• Do you think shy people focus too much on their fears? What could help them be less fearful?

12. What other kinds of girls make easy targets for Mean Girls?

• What part does jealousy play in Mean Girl problems?

• can you prevent someone from being jealous of you? if so, how?

• How could a popular use her influence as a way to help other girls instead of making herself a target? What about a hot girl? or a smart girl?

8.

closinG PrAYer:introduce this week’s prayer time with this question: “What is one way that you would like to do a better job dealing with the Mean Girls in your life?” (You might want to list a few ideas to get them rolling: having a better sense of humor about myself, hiding my anger, etc.) encourage the girls to be vulnerable and share one response with the group. Then end the night by giving them time to pray silently for each other.

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session 2 | oPeninG AcTiviTY

o v e r c o M i n G T H e s l A Mit happens to all of us: some girl slams you with an insult or rude behavior. or maybe you’re just the witness standing by while another girl gets slammed by a Mean Girl. so what can you do to take away the power of her slam? Throughout the “Mean Girl” section of the book, Hayley offers lots of ideas for dealing with Mean Girls in your life:

1. “ignore her: Don’t give her any reaction.” (p. 53).

2. “ Don’t let the label others put on you ruin who you are or who you become. if it’s true, then own it. change it into something positive. And if it’s not true, start the anti-label campaign. Prove them wrong with your actions by being who you really are, not who they are trying to make you.” (p. 57-58).

3. “ remember, if you make fun of yourself, you take away the power of the slam from the other person.” (p. 67).

Here’s a chance for you to practice overcoming the slam. read through each of the situations, and then brainstorm ways that you could overcome the slam as the victim, the victim’s friend, or the friend of the Mean Girl.

siTuATion #1: Mean Girl Monica relishes picking on Ashley. Every chance she gets, she makes snide comments to her—especially about her choice of clothes. Last weekend, she wrote an article called “Why The Fashion Police Should Kill Ashley.” She posted it on her blog and included some unflattering pictures she’d taken with her camera phone when Ashley wasn’t looking. Then she sent the link to nearly everyone in their class—including Ashley. What can Ashley do?

What can Ashley’s friends do?

What can Monica’s friends do?

siTuATion #2: Jessica’s boyfriend, Ben, recently dumped her. He started dating Claire two weeks later. Now Jessica is trashing Claire every chance she gets. She’s been telling people that Claire is a slut who stole her boyfriend by inviting him over to “study” and then luring him into a major make-out session, The truth is, Claire had rarely even talked to Ben before he asked her out, and they’ve never done anything more than an innocent kiss good-night. What can Claire do?

What can Claire’s friend do?

What can Jessica’s friend do?

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s e s s i o n T H r e e

ThE SpIRITuAL SIdE of MEANoPeninG AcTiviTY: interior Decorators

suPPlies neeDeD: magazines and catalogs, posterboard, markers, scissors, glue

Before this session, gather together about 10-15 magazines and catalogs. (You may need more if your group is quite large.) include some old, out-of-date catalogs/magazines if you can find them.

When the girls arrive, divide them into two teams. Give each team a piece of posterboard, as well as some scissors, markers, and glue. Tell them that they are interior decorators today and they must use their supplies to create a presentation of the items they would use to decorate a house. suggest that they create a posterboard for each of the following categories:

• kitchen • Bedroom • living room • Bathroom

Before the teams get to work, tell them to consider one last detail: Their client. Team A is working for a young, successful, and upbeat single girl: They should look for the cutest, trendiest items they can find for her house. Team B is working for oscar the Grouch: They should decorate his house with the ugliest, trashiest items they can find. Tell them to be creative and do the best job they can at meeting their client’s expectations.

Give the teams about 10 minutes to work and then have them take turns presenting their decorating plans to each other.

Note: If your group is quite large, you may want to use four teams instead of two.

FolloW-uP quesTions: 1. How would you feel if you got to live in the young woman’s house? How about if you had to live

in oscar the Grouch’s house?

2. if a girl always focuses on ugly, negative things in life, how would that affect her moods and her actions? What kind of impact will she make on her friends and her school?

3. What about a girl who focuses more on the positive, good things? What kind of actions and impact will she make?

Discussion quesTions: 1. How would you think differently if you knew that people could read your thoughts?

• How does it make you feel to know that God can read all your thoughts? is that a good thing or a bad thing for you?

• How do you think God feels about the stuff that’s on your mind a lot of the time?

2. Agree or disagree: Teen girls spend a lot of time thinking about negative things.

• Does anyone get hurt by your negative thoughts? Why or why not?

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3. Hayley says “You are what you think” (p.108). What do you think that means?

• What do you and your friends spend a lot of time thinking and talking about? What does that say about you?

• Are there any things you’d like to spend less time thinking about?

• Are there any things you’d like to spend more time thinking about?

4. Why does Hayley say that it’s wrong for a christian to be offended by things people say or do toward them?

• How does taking offense at lots of things reveal a focus on yourself instead of God?

• What does it mean to trust God with your reputation?

5. What does it mean to protect God’s reputation?

• can you think of any specific examples when you’ve heard or seen people offend God?

• How can you stick up for God without coming across as holier-than-thou?

6. Do you think christian teens spend more time worrying about what God thinks of them—or what other teens think of them? Why do you think this is?

• is it easier to stick up for yourself or to stick up for God? Why?

7. As a group, come up with two specific Mean Girl situations you’ve witnessed. (Don’t use real names, though—that could be mean!)

• How do you think God felt about the victim of that Mean Girl problem?

• How do you think God felt about that Mean Girl?

• What kind of outcome would make God smile? What kind of outcome would make God sad?

8. What does it mean to “die to self”? What needs to die? (check out p. 121 if this idea is still confusing to you.)

• Are there parts of you that you shouldn’t let die? if so, what?

9. What are the benefits of dying to yourself?

• How does dying to yourself change your relationship with God?

• How does dying to self make you a stronger person?

• How might dying to your self actually help you find yourself?

10. Discuss this quote: “Dying to self never involves doing something that’s easy to do but always involves something that’s a challenge” (p. 125).

• Why is it difficult to die to our selves?

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• if we know it’s for the best, then why is it still so hard to die to ourselves?

11. What are some practical ways you can practice dying to yourself in everyday life?

closinG PrAYer:Ask each of the girls to take a turn sharing a personal prayer request. Then enter into a time of “popcorn” prayer, inviting girls to jump in with prayers spontaneously. Ask someone to close the prayer for your group after several minutes of the popcorn prayer.

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s e s s i o n F o u r

fIGhTING MEANoPeninG AcTiviTY: sweet revenge?

suPPlies neeDeD: paper, pens

As the girls arrive, divide them into the following groups: revengers, confronters, and overlookers. Hand each team paper and pen, and ask them to designate a scribe who will write down their group’s responses during this activity.

read through each of the scenarios listed below, asking the groups to discuss their reaction to each Mean Girl problem as you go. Give groups the following guidelines for writing their responses:

• The revenGers should come up with a response designed to “get even” with the Mean Girl involved.

• The conFronTers should describe how they would stand up to the Mean Girl, without being vengeful.

• The overlookers should describe their strategy for ignoring the Mean Girl and proving her wrong through their actions.

After you’ve read through all the scenarios and the groups have completed their responses, take turns having the groups share their strategies

scenArio #1: Lindsey has been flirting with your boyfriend for weeks. Today, she asked him to go with her to the homecoming dance.

scenArio #2: When you got the lead in the school play instead of Rachel, she started a rumor: She claimed that your parents—who happen to be big donors to the school—threatened to stop their financial support if you didn’t get the role.

scenArio #3: Kate is always making snide comments about your good grades at school. Last weekend, she and her friends trashed your car, writing words like “Loser” and “Brown-noser” on the windows in permanent marker and even slashing a hole in one of your tires.

After the groups have written down responses to each of the scenarios, have them take turns sharing their responses. Ask these follow-up questions as you go:

1. Would getting revenge make you feel better about these problems? Why or why not? Does it ever solve a Mean Girl problem? Why or why not?

2. How might the revengers actually make the Mean Girl problem worse?

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3. For each scenario, discuss which response would be better: confronting or overlooking.

4. What would be some practical ways you could love the Mean Girl in each scenario?

Discussion quesTions: 1. in general, does our culture think revenge is acceptable? can you think of examples from Tv,

movies, or real life to support your answer?

• Does revenge ever serve anyone besides yourself? Why or why not?

• How often would you say the girls in your school practice revenge? A lot? A little? in between?

2. in what way is taking revenge on a Mean Girl like stealing from God? (Just in case you didn’t catch this when you were reading, check out p. 140.)

• Why do you think God wants to be the one to handle vengeance?

• “The idea is that someone sins against God by doing something to you” (p. 148). Does this idea change your picture of Mean Girl problems? if so, how?

• Why’s it hard to leave revenge up to God?

3. What kind of justifications do christians give to make revenge sound okay?

• How does taking revenge affect you as a person? Your relationship with God?

4. How can you know if you should stand up to a Mean Girl or if you should just ignore her?

• Hayley says that “standing up is used in rare instances, because most of the time turning the other cheek is more appropriate” (p. 150). Do you agree? Why or why not?

• if you do need a confrontation, how should you handle this differently for believers and nonbelievers?

• is it okay to stand up to someone even if might make them mad? Why or why not?

5. Discuss this quote: “As a believer, you stand up in the face of attack by removing yourself from the attack. . . . if you stand up to her in order to please God, he is between you and her, and he is still your focus” (p. 143).

• How can you “remove yourself from the attack”? How can make it more about God and less about you?

• When does sticking up for yourself and sticking up for God become the same thing?

6. How would Mean Girl situations change if more girls stood up for each other instead of just for themselves?

• What are some practical ways you could show support for other girls who are dealing with Mean Girls?

7. What sort of advice would you give to a girl who realizes that some of her friends are Mean Girls?

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• is it ever ok to continue hanging out with someone, even though they may be a Mean Girl?

• How do you know when it’s time to call it quits with a friendship? How do you “break up” with a mean friend?

8. Discuss this quote: “You aren’t fighting the girl, you are fighting the enemy” (p. 158). How does this idea change your perspective of Mean Girl problems in your life?

• How does satan use Mean Girl situations to distract us from God?

• What kind of lies has satan spread about Mean Girl problems?

9. How much does your faith affect the way you look at life—including Mean Girl problems? A lot? A little? not at all?

• What percentage of the time would you say you spend thinking about life from your own perspective/feelings? What percentage of the time do you spend trying to look at life from God’s perspective?

• What are some concrete steps you could take to build a more God-centered life?

10. When it comes to Mean Girls, Hayley says, “Don’t look for an outcome; just keep your eye on the process of you becoming the woman you were made to be” (p. 167).

• What kind of woman do you want to be? What kind of woman do you think God wants you to become?

• How will focusing on those goals help you deal with Mean Girls better?

If you are not meeting for the optional Session Five Prayer Walk, end this session by reading together through “The God Girl” section of Mean Girls on p. 182-186. Then ask the girls to sign the God Girl

contract on p. 189 and conclude with this question:

What can we do to help each other live up to the God Girl Contract?

closinG PrAYer:Before this session’s prayer, explain that each girl is going to be praying for the person to her right. Then give all of the girls an opportunity to share prayer requests. (encourage them to pay close attention to the requests of the girl on their right.) if you have a group that is still shy about public prayer, remind them that simple, short prayers are fine, as long as they are heartfelt.

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s e s s i o n F i v e

ENdING MEAN: ThE MEAN GIRL pRAyER wALkend your Mean Girl study with a session that includes fun, food, and prayer. We suggest taking the girls out for a fast-food supper (or ordering some take-out to eat at your youth building/home). While you eat, ask the girls if they signed the God-Girl contract at the end of their reading for this week. Take a few minutes to discuss these three questions:

1. What is one of the most helpful lessons you learned from our Mean Girls study?

2. How would “Girl World” be different if everyone lived up to the God Girl standards? How can we try to make this happen?

3. What is one step you want to take to make yourself a stronger God Girl?

After you’re done eating and sharing, lead the girls in the “Mean Girl” prayer walk outlined below.

Please note that this special session will require a longer time period than your other study sessions. If you want to include time for dinner and the prayer walk, we suggest allowing at least 30 minutes for supper, and an hour or more for the Prayer Walk.

PrAYer WAlk inTro (5 minutes)introduce your prayer walk by reading or telling the story of the israelites marching around Jericho from Joshua 6:1-20. Draw a parallel between the walls of Jericho and the walls that get put up between girls because of Mean Girls. Tell them that tonight your goal is to take a march of your own—with the goal of asking God to tear down those Mean Girl walls in their schools and their personal lives.

scHool PrAYers (30-45 minutes)Make a list of each school represented by your group of girls. if the driving distances are reasonable, drive to each school for a prayer walk.

At each school, give the girls who attend a moment to share about the “Mean Girl” atmosphere there. Ask one of the girls from your group to say a prayer for that school (or offer the prayer yourself). Then ask the girls to quietly walk around the school, saying silent prayers as they go.

if some of the schools are too distant, you can simply pray for them while you are at one of the other schools. Do a second walk around the building, encouraging the girls to be thinking of the distant school this time around.

if you have a very large group representing several schools, you may also consider dividing the group into smaller crews that go to their own school.

PrAYers For eAcH oTHer (15-30 minutes)Meet back at your church or youth center and end the night by praying for each other. set up two rows of chairs—one on each end of the room. (side A and side B) set up enough chairs so there is one for every girl in the group. space the chairs about 8 feet apart.

After the girls are seated, ask those on side A to walk over to the person sitting opposite them on side B.

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They should kneel down in front of that girl and ask if she has any special prayer requests. once the requests have been shared, the kneeling girl will pray for the girl on the chair and then walk quietly back to the other end of the room. each girl should sit down on a different chair than the one she originally came from.

now have the side B girls repeat the same procedure, praying for someone on side A and returning to a different seat on their own side.

repeat this process as time allows. since the girls will be returning to different seats each time, they should end up with opportunities to pray for several different girls.

Note: If your girls have a hard time knowing what prayers to request, remind them to think about their answer to the question: What is one step you’d like to take to become a stronger God Girl?

WrAP-uP PrAYerend the night by saying one final, brief prayer for your girls. encourage them to keep praying for their schools and for each other.

FurTHer AcTionsvisit nomoremean.com or iFuse.com to find more girls who are taking the Mean Girl challenge.

compare notes. start a revolution!

Help make your generation the first generation of girls who aren’t Mean Girls.To hook up with more girls looking to put an end to Mean Girls, go to our online social at iFuse.com.

resources

visit www.hungryplanet.net

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