Marriage was God’s idea and parenting was His

plan for reproducing His image on the earth.

So…

If you want to have a Godly marriage and be a Godly

parent…

where do you start?

You start with yourself.

Personality Profile

•Sanguine

•Choleric

•Melancholy

•Phlegmatic

Sanguine

• Fun• Life of the party• Outgoing/Popular• Social

“Otter”

Choleric

• Control• Born Leader• In Charge• Powerful

“Lion”

Melancholy

• Perfectionist• Thinker• Organized• Likes structure

“Beaver”

Phlegmatic

• Peaceful• Agreeable• Good Listener

“Golden Retriever”

Mad About YouWays To Bury Conflict

• Stay too busy• Change the subject• Become passive• Play the peace at any price game• Rejection of feelings

Mad About YouQuick Tips to Remember During

Conflict.*Calm Down*Make understanding your aim*Listen / Eye Contact.*Do not attack - verbally or physically*Avoid making “You” statements.*Do not defend yourself.

Mad About YouQuick Tips to Remember During

Conflict.*Leave the past in the past.*Keep short accounts.*Act wisely not foolishly.*He/She is not the enemy.

ParentingEveryone has an opinion on how to develop

and maintain a healthy family/home life.

H umor

O pportunity

M eeting Needs

E quipping

ParentingHumor

One of the marks of maturity is to be able to laugh at yourself.

- Let your kids see you laugh at yourself.

ParentingOpportunity

Find one thing they do well and affirm it.

ParentingMeeting Needs

Acceptance

Affirmation

Approval

Affection

Authority

Access

ParentingEquipping“Teach them to your children, and talk about

them when you sit at home and walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Write them down and tie them to your hands as a sign. Tie them on your forehead to remind you, and write them on your doors and gates.” Deut. 6:7-9

Everything a child hears, sees and does is stored---at least sub-consciously and though the child may be unaware of it, these deposits help make him what he is as he matures. -Jerry Jenkins

Rebellion: When the Beaver Starts Acting Like Beavis

Rebellion is . . . Arise against authority.

Rebellion is . . . The deliberate avoidance, neglect, or turning away from a faith they once held as their own.

Rebellion: When the Beaver Starts Acting Like Beavis

There Are Two Kinds of Rebellion:

• Passive

• Active

Focus on the Family Parent Survey Results:

33% said their children did not rebel.

37% said their children definitely rebelled.

30% said their children went through periods of minor rebellion.

Facts About Dealing with Rebellion

• Rules without a relationship result in rebellion.

• Rules with a relationship result in respect.

• Clear expectations during the early years can lessen the chances for strong rebellion in the teen years.

Facts About Dealing with Rebellion (cont.)

• Saying “No” all the time leads to rebellion. It could be passive rebellion. Mom and Dad are a “no win” situation.

• Strong love overcomes rebellion.

• If Mom and Dad are not together regarding kids’ issues, rebellion is maximized.

How to Minimize Rebellion:

• Start early talking and listening to your children.• Realize not everything is a big deal.• Be Calm.• Give them experiential knowledge of the truth

about consequences.• Do not discipline when you are Hungry, Angry,

or Tired.• Do not let conflict consume your life.

Forgiveness•What is Forgiveness?

Forgiveness•What is Forgiveness?

1. To cancel punishment.

Forgiveness•What is Forgiveness?

1. To cancel punishment.2. To erase what is due.

Forgiveness•What is Forgiveness?

1. To cancel punishment.2. To erase what is due.3. To give up resentment.

Forgiveness• What Forgiveness Is Not

1. Forgiveness is not just saying “I’m sorry.”

2. Forgiveness is not conditional.3. Forgiveness is not a feeling.4. Forgiveness is not keeping score.5. Forgiveness is not pretending the situation

never happened.6. Forgiveness is not indifference.

Forgiveness• What Forgiveness Is Not

7. Forgiveness is not condoning the wrong.

8. Forgiveness is not saying, “Let’s just forgetabout it.”

9. Forgiveness does not strive to teach theoffender a lesson.

Forgiveness• What Forgiveness Is Not

10. Forgiveness does not mean there won’t be

consequences.11. Forgiveness does not mean the person you

forgave will change.12. Forgiveness deals effectively with past

wounds, but doesn’t insulate from futurehurts.

Forgiveness• YOU’RE THE

OFFENDER:-How do you get

forgiveness?

1. Humbly Ask1 John 1:9

• YOU’VE BEENOFFENDED:-How do you forgive?

1. Ask for Mercy, not for Justice.

Matthew 18:21-35