marrakech essay redrafting

15
Marrakech Improving Your Essay With P.E.E.

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This is the first part of the slidedeck I put together to help my S5/6 class redraft and improve their Marrakech essays.

TRANSCRIPT

Page 1: Marrakech Essay Redrafting

MarrakechImproving Your Essay With P.E.E.

Page 2: Marrakech Essay Redrafting

How Not To Use Quotations

"Anyone can be sorry for the donkey with its galed back, but it is generally owing to some kind of acident if one even notices the old woman under her load of sticks"

This quote by George shows that people care more about the donkeys than the people. It also shows the old woman had to carry a load of sticks that the donkey could have carried instead and I don't think it is fair either.

Page 3: Marrakech Essay Redrafting

"Anyone can be sorry for the donkey with its galed back, but it is generally owing to some kind of acident if one even notices the old woman under her load of sticks"

This quote by George shows that people care more about the donkeys than the people. It also shows the old woman had to carry a load of sticks that the donkey could have carried instead and I don't think it is fair either.

Page 4: Marrakech Essay Redrafting

"Anyone can be sorry for the donkey with its galed back, but it is generally owing to some kind of acident if one even notices the old woman under her load of sticks"

This quote by George shows that people care more about the donkeys than the people. It also shows the old woman had to carry a load of sticks that the donkey could have carried instead and I don't think it is fair either.

Spelling Errors are

unforgivable in a

quotation!

You must always

introduce a quotation!

You don't know Orwell! Use Surnames only!

You are meant to write in something called formal

continuous prose… and that means no contractions!

Page 5: Marrakech Essay Redrafting

P.E.E.

• Point

• Evidence

• Explanation

Page 6: Marrakech Essay Redrafting

Point

• What point are you trying to make in the first place?

• How does the point relate to the main THEME(S) of

the text?

• What is the best way of introducing your point?

Page 7: Marrakech Essay Redrafting

Evidence

• Does your evidence really support or prove the

point you are trying to make?

• How much of the quotation is actually needed?

• Have you presented the evidence correctly?

Page 8: Marrakech Essay Redrafting

Explanation

• Unless you explain what your evidence

shows, you are wasting your time.

• Your explanation needs to show or explain

the relationship between the evidence and the

point you are trying to make.

• Simplicity and clarity are always the best

strategies.

Page 9: Marrakech Essay Redrafting

Look... A Donkey!

• Let's look again at the

quotation I've selected...

• 1st: What aspect of the

THEME does it illustrate?

• 2nd: It's a long quotation…

do we need to use all of it?

• 3rd: What point are you trying

to make by using it?

Page 10: Marrakech Essay Redrafting

Main Theme

The end of

colonialism is

inevitable...

Page 11: Marrakech Essay Redrafting

Main Theme

The end of

colonialism is

inevitable...

PS: Morocco was a

French colony… Orwell

is British, but he was

visiting Morocco!

Page 12: Marrakech Essay Redrafting

How To Use Quotations

"Anyone can be sorry for the donkey with its galed back, but it is generally owing to some kind of acident if one even notices the old woman under her load of sticks"

First: MAKE SURE IT IS SPELLED CORRECTLY!

Page 13: Marrakech Essay Redrafting

How To Use Quotations

"Anyone can be sorry for the donkey with its galled back, but it is generally owing to some kind of accident if one even notices the old woman under her load of sticks"

First: MAKE SURE IT IS SPELLED CORRECTLY!

Page 14: Marrakech Essay Redrafting

What Does The Quotation

Illustrate… And How?

• It has to illustrate something related to the

theme if it is to be worth using...

Quickly write down what you think the

quotation has to say about the MAIN

THEME of the essay.

(2 minutes!)

Page 15: Marrakech Essay Redrafting

What Does The Quotation

Illustrate… And How?

• Which part of the quotation is actually the

important bit?

Quickly select the word(s) that are actually

related to the main theme. The skill is

remembering that you want to use the

minimum of words from the original and are

allowed to paraphrase the rest.

(2 minutes!)