manbir's journey to gurprasadi naam - 2003

8/10/2019 Manbir's Journey to Gurprasadi Naam - 2003

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Manbirs Spiritual Journey (Apr 03 Sep 04)

Its really inspiring for everyone to see how another bhagats 'love story" with SAtnaam is

unfolding. Baba ji said every bhagat must be able to tell their own unique love story withGod. hat is why no two saints are the same. !ere is a glimpse on anbir #i$s story. %ehave &nown her sine she ame to our lasses at the Gurdwara. She has always shonebright as a speial saint. (ow she is at ollege and e)periening deep separation from God*+airag,.

-ust f /our 0eet

/ou an listen to her beautiful shabad &irtan and satnaam singing in sangat here.

Contact :-

[email protected]

www.satnaam.info

2005

1
https://satnaam.box.com/s/8gx4wywlmeytvb25920emailto:[email protected]://www.satnaam.info/https://satnaam.box.com/s/8gx4wywlmeytvb25920emailto:[email protected]://www.satnaam.info/


2/38

17/4/03

We all must walk on the Path of

Thorns leading to the Valley ofFlowers

Pea!e and "ight#

$an%ir &aur1'/0(/03

STRONGER YEARNING....

Nights have become longer.

And it seems so have days.

This yearning has become stronger.

As i wait in vain (vaheguroo)

It seems i have become blind.

Because i cant see you Vaheguroo.

I will soon be deaf; in time.Heavanly music is fading too.

Gradually i grow weaker.

Fighting internal battles.

Worldly affairs become deeper.

And gursikhi foundations shatter.

VAHEGUROO you hear me!

And hold me by my arms.

I dont ask to be free.

Just bless me with you Naam.

Like a lotus flower.

residing in mirky waters.

You Maharaaj live in me.

Closed away in my hearts quarters.

Now the soul grows lonely.

All love gradually drains.

Life withers away slowly.

Because i forgot to sing you name.

2


3/38

Nights have become longer.

And it seems so have days.

This yearning has become stronger.

My ardas is to sing your name.....

VAHEGUROO VAHEGUROO VAHEGUROO VAHEGUROO VAHEGUROO VAHEGUROO VAHEGUROOVAHEGUROO VAHEGUROO VAHEGUROO VAHEGUROO VAHEGUROO VAHEGUROO VAHEGUROO

VAHEGUROO VAHEGUROO JEE

thank-you for taking out the time to read a low lifes pathetic attempt to

write about vaheguroo vaheguroo vaheguroo vaheguroo

)4/10/03

Dream

I saw your face in my dream last night.

It was so beautiful that I cant get it out of my mind.

So bright, so pure simply mind awing.

In your ocean of beauty I was slowly falling.

Falling, falling, falling, into the never ending sea.

Enjoying, enjoying, enjoying this feeling within me.

I must savour the taste and never let go.

Here tae my breath away, Ive let life go.

Seep through my veins and out my hands.

I no longer have any other plans.


It was so beautiful it !uenched the thirst of my eyes.

Ive been struc by sadness and sudden separation.

I no longer have the need of material possessions.

Ive never been in love lie this before.

How can I endure the distance any more.

"ll I want is a place at your feet.

#ome visit me, I no longer sleep.

I saw your face in my dream last night.It was so beautiful I contemplate on it all the time.

I ga$e painfully outside the window of my soul.

I call out %&'( name, who else can I call)

Every slight movement gives me false hope.

%oull soon be bac, when) I dont now.

3


4/38


It was so beautiful, Im still hypnoti$ed.

vaheguroo vaheguroo vaheguroo vaheguroo vaheguroo vaheguroo vaheguroo

vaheguroo vaheguroo vaheguroo vaheguroo vaheguroo vaheguroo vaheguroo

vaheguroo vaheguroo vaheguroo vaheguroo

vaheguroo vaheguroo vaheguroo vaheguroo vaheguroo vaheguroo vaheguroovaheguroo vaheguroo vaheguroo vaheguroo vaheguroo vaheguroo vaheguroo

vaheguroo vaheguroo vaheguroo vaheguroo

10/11/03

what Im confused about is, does Bhai gurdas ji mean actual 'SATAA!' or does it mean thetrue name"'#aheguroo'$

%&arjitre(lied about SATAA!)

18/11/03

1 just wanted to *now how do +ou find a (uran brahm g+ani

2and also (aji who is teh one +ou are tal*ing about

than*s (aji

%&arjitre(lied about brahmgiani)

)*/07/04

A&-./0 I A &A4SAA&-./0 I I 5AT-& I

50! T&- 6-T-0 5 !7 &-A0T

I ha#ent emailed +ou (aji in a long time and now when I need someone to

hel( me the most, guru has onl+ shown one (erson who could hel( me and that

is +ouAnd it is onl+ in time of need I ha#e remembered ahguroo and his beautifulan otherwise I am foolish and ignorant

a(anae lobh *o *eeno meeth 885or their own ad#antage, the+ ma*e .od their friend

So +ou see it is onl+ for m+ selfish needs that I am actuall+ emailing +ouI was thin*ing earlier how am I going to email (aji for hel( after so long,

he will thin* im selfish, and I was considering man+ e9cuses but none of

them wor*ed and so now im telling +ou the truth, I feel a des(eration goneso dee( it hurts and on the slight thought of #aheguroos lo#e for me I cant

sto( cr+ing

:


5/38

Im in search for so man+ things, meaning s(iritual fruits, but where to

begin I dont *now$

!+ searching thoughts m+ as(iring feelings soar high li*e a restless bird

5orgetting e#er+thing else see*ing the anhad shabad I ha#e still not heard

;hat is the m+stic word that must be contem(lated b+ a si*hThis is the state of m+ soul, afraid life will be wasted awa+ in slee(

I ha#e sa#ed and read man+ times +our (re#ious emails, but I the fool stilldont understand an+thing

7ou said to become one with the Sat ;aaho> is the Bani of the True ;ord

Searching, the .urmu*hs ha#e found it;aaho> ;aaho> The+ chant the ;ord of the Shabad

;aaho> ;aaho> The+ enshrine it in their hearts

6hanting ;aaho> ;aaho> the .urmu*hs easil+ obtain the 4ord,After searching

ana*, #er+ fortunate are those who reflect

u(on the 4ord, &ar, &ar,within their hearts 88288

7ou also *indl+ e9(lained to me that the (ath of (rema bhagti consists of

Satguru, Sat Sangat and Sataam, +ou ha#e alread+ e9(lained in detail

Satguru, who historicall+ has alwa+s been a human being closest to .od onthis earth, but then the confusion too* (lace when +ou said that when bani

refers to Sant it can be understood as Satguru, and that e#er+ (erson

searches a sant and b+ ser#ing them in time the+ too become sant asillustrated b+ Baba and Singh and Baba &arnam Singh

?ue +our detailed and interesting e9(lanation I too feel com(elled now to

find the su((ort of a Sant Satguru if thats what it will ta*e to ma*e(rogress

!+ thoughts are in a muddle right now, so if +ou dont follow what Im

tr+ing to sa+ Im reall+ sorr+, m+ objecti#e for this email is reall+ to

@


6/38

get some basic understanding, basic as in goo goo ga ga language on how to

get on the s(iritual (ath, how to mo#e on it, and find out if theres a an%sant)

that can hold m+ hand and hel( me, cos I cant do this alone

!+ ho(es in an+ mortal ha#e been #anuished

I turn to the original source of m+ beingIn countless forms of de#otion I#e relished

But ha#e sought no s(iritual feeling

I had sought aheguroo with m+ e+es

4ate I understood he resides within

This realiation came after brea*ing ties

;ith those who understand this meaning

That all is ne, the ne is all

!+ ignorance once standing tall

I#e (laced and loc*ed in cageTo be able to watch the (la+ of stage

I see* neither freedom nor (ower

I see* no lo#e and feel no loss

I ha#e +our charans as m+ fortress towerSu((orting me on m+ journe+ across

7et I feel an in#isible ro(e around m+ nec*

Im tied bac*, such is m+ stateI wonder in this the noose of jamdooth

That one ma+ call m+ well deser#ed fruit

But isnt ones life fruitful singing +ou name$

Isnt ones life fruitful not desiring wealth or fame$

Then how is it I sit in such a (redicament$!aharaaj how did I earn this torment$

Is there a soul who can see m+ (ain$

Should m+ ho(e in a mortal be re"ignited$6ould that mortal eliminate this strain$

And hel( me be once again be united

I beg .uru ji ma+ that mortal enter m+ life

;ith a de#oted heart hear m+ (light

I beg .uru ji let that soul reflect +our lightAnd bless this moora*h with s(iritual insight

I beg to be at the charans of +our ans

&a#e the might to surrender m+ than man dhan

C


7/38

These words cannot to justice to this +earning

That has com(elled me to find s(iritual healing

The dee(er I#e searched in to ancient scri(tures

The further I felt from m+ destination

But singing aheguroo theres a constant fi9tureIs this maharaaj +our chosen name$$

As +ou said this life is a riddle, and +ou must become truthful and ha#ethe barrier of falsehood torn down, so (aji I stand before +ou with m+

hands together and as* +ou to hel( me tear this barrier down and learn to

ser#e truthDSach

I#e written this email in one of m+ most lowest and (owerful bhairaag

states so if I ha#e said an+thing to offend +ou with m+ foolishness then I

am dee(l+ sorr+, but I ho(e that the arrow of m+ aim %this email) has

(ierced +ou and +ou ma+ hel( me

aitsree, 5ifth !ehl=*oee jan har sio dhae#ai jor 88

charan geho ba*o subh rasanaa dheejehi (raan a*or 88188 rehaao 88

If only someone would unite me with the o!d"

I hold tight to #is feet$ and utte! sweet wo!ds with my tongue%

I ma&e my '!eath of life an offe!ing to #im. ((1(()ause((

Its ta*en me a long time to be able to tell an+one these feelings I ha#e shared in this email with+ou, and I reall+ trul+ ho(e to maharaaj that +ou ma+ some how hel( this worthless being

h ahguroo

A&-./0 I A &A4SA

A&-./0 I I 5AT-& I


8/38

if +ou read the two (re#ious emails= first one from me to &arjit (aji and the second, a re(l+ from

&arjit (aji, +ou will understand m+ *hoj %search) and wh+ i ha#e contacted

+ou see, for +ears i#e been tra#elling on this gursi*hi marg %(ath) but ha#e de#elo(ed in no real

s(iritual wa+, nor ha#e i been blessed b+ an+one with .ur(arsadi naam

and now m+ des(eration e9ceeds me and i am in total bhairaag reaching the most lowest (oints,

i#e been blessed with the o((ortunit+ to contact a real sant, a sant that ma+ (ossibl+ bring light

in to m+ dar*ened life

i ha#e ne#er had such a blessed aus(icious chance to e#er as* an+ sant ji in m+ life to guide me

or hel( me in an+ s(iritual wa+, to be uite honest, i feel i should, I#e ne#er felt sure following a

sant, in case that sant as*s or e9(ects me to belie#e in him and worshi( him as .od, this fear has*e(t me awa+ from Sants, but with the assurance gi#en from &arjit (aji, whom i would trust with

m+ life i am contacting +ou and ho(e +ou will be the one who can caste light on m+ life and heal

the (ain of this s(iritual +earing for the .ur(arsadi naam

but before i do benti, i would li*e to as* just this uestion, whether +ou belie#e .uru .ranth

Sahib ji to be +our onl+ li#ing s(iritual .uru, and the embodiment of the 1F gurus and also if +ouha#e been blessed with the Amrit sweet nectar from the (unj (i+arai$

then m+ heart felt humble benti to +ou ji is that (lease ma+ +ou do ardaas to a*aal (ura*h andbless this low life with .ur(arsadi naam(lease ji it is all that i li#e for now

if i ha#e offended +ou in an+ wa+, then (lease forgi#e me for im just a child see*ing shelter at the

feet of those sla#es of m+ dear belo#ed .uru maharaaj

(lease email me bac*, im #er+ *een to hear from +ou ji #er+ soon

#aheguroo ji *a *halsa #aheguroo ji *i fateh ji

%Sant ji re(lied and e9(lained amritdharee real meaning)

28/0*/0+

i just read +our email %Sant ji) and to tell +ou the truth, first i couldnt sto( cr+ing because i feel asthough im not worth+ of such great truth, secondl+ +ou ha#e s(o*en so man+ great truths that i

ha#e access to so easil+ when (re#iousl+ i was d+ing to *now the real truth, the -&

AAA0 SATAA! T0/T& that i cant belie#e that m+ *arams could ha#e this in store for

me

7ou'#e as*ed me do i ha#e an+ uestions, and the truth is, e#er+thing +ou ha#e written wasabsolutel+ beauitful and +ou ha#e answered just about e#er+thing for now, m+ worr+ about

whether i would be able to agree with +ou ha#e also dis(elled and i feel almost full+ sure about

see*ing +our guidance, infact i feel totall+ securel+ sure

G


9/38

!+ uestion about whether +ou are amritdharee was not becuase i would not s(ea* to +ou if u

were not but rather to see how +ou would re(l+ to this uestion, not that i had an+ (articular

agenda to this uestion but i was rather curious about if +ou thin* being armitdharee is necessar+,but i can see now that +ou are an amritdharee in the true sense as how +ou descibed it and +ou

are trull+ drenched from head to toe in '&/!AA0--


10/38

parlo ey att neechan ey att neech; a piece of dirt of the charans of the entire creation; when Guru$ana Patshah Ji" being $iranaar 0oop Himself have called Himself $eech9 $ana $eech 'ahey)ichaar; $ana 2assan 2ass udh #agey Binwatta; then how can we call ourselves anything else; andthat is what you too have to become; you have to reach the heights of the humility and the humbleness"that is where the ey to the 2argah is in unlimited humility and humbleness; #al Purah resides in theHirda which becomes saturated with the unlimited" un-measurable" sea of humility and humbleness; every1habad of the Gurbani is 1habad Guru9 every 1habad is a complete eternal truth in itself; and that is whatyou have to become to reach the #lmighty&

+t is the innocence" humility" humbleness" commitment" belief" trust and faith in Gur" Guru and Gurbanithat will tae you to the heights of the spiritual world" these are the divine %ualities that will bring you theGur Parsaad of 1uhaag and then 1ada 1uhaag& hese divine %ualities will mae your Bandgi very easyand smooth" so please eliminate your own mind and your own wisdom and tae the divine wisdom" taethe Gurmat which is the 1habad Guru Gurbani" this will ill your ego and help you come out of the 6eb of3aya; surrender yourself completely to the Gur and Guru and you will reach the /ltimate&

God has Blessed you with all the spiritual treasures" He has already opened His eternal treasures to you"it depends on you now how much you can collect from this unlimited ban of eternal treasures" yourprogress will depend on your innocence" commitment" belief" faith" trust and e:ercising all the learning ofthe divine wisdom in your daily life" your own wisdom will hurt you whereas the divine wisdom will helpyou&

ee( u( the communication, Bhagat i will send +ou some more .ur


11/38

but then i begun ha#ing thoughts about other tri#ial famil+ situations and would tr+ still m+ mind

again b+ not losing focus of Satnaam and found it more im(ortant to *ee( the numbers correct

though i do not usuall+ enjo+ counting how man+ times i sa+ satnaam, i found a rh+thmicmethod to sing satnaam mentall+ that didnt allow me to count at all

i found during the hour m+ bod+ was detached from m+ mind, as though i could not feel m+bod+, as before i began i had recentl+ cut m+self and the cut was hurting me, but when i began

ja( i cud not feel the (ain nor an+ other (art of m+ bod+, until i would lose m+ concentration and

then i would ha#e a bodil+ sensation such a twitch or itch

thirdl+, when i would ja( Satnaam with concentration i would feel a (ressure on m+ tri*uti, but

would find this (ressure too (owerful, that i would lose m+ concentration as soon as the (ressure

would be felt, so this (ressure continued coming and going

near the end of the hour, i would still continue with a( Satnaam, but then would feel this

astonishing (eace, as though m+ whole jea is drenched in (eace, m+ mind is still and is at (eace

this feeling as(ired me to continue, but m+ bod+ felt fatigue and so i foundnd m+self fightingagainst slee(

than*+ou so much for e#er+thing that +ou ha#e done for this begger

and i will continue to beg +ou to hel( this lost *hojee atma to find a (lace at our 6hojee (reetams

charan *amaland as alwa+s i am sorr+ if i ha#e said an+thing foolish, for thats what foolish (eo(le li*e me do

maaf *arna ji

Sataam Sataam SataamSataam Sataam Sataam

Sataam Sada Sada Sataam

Sant ji re(l+ =

It loo*s li*e +ou are doing greatH *ee( it u(, the Simran is in !ind onl+H then it will tra#el toother (arts of the bod+H with 0asna is aa(H so *ee( on doing Simran in !indH it has alread+ gone

into +our Surat"mindH so that is reall+ #er+ good, just *ee( it doing and *ee( on enjo+ing the

(eace +ou are feeling, (ressure at tri*uti is the Amrit, which is #er+ good, it will o(en all +our

di#ine doors, longer sessions of meditation will follow, just *ee( on (ra+ing for the .ur


12/38

i would li*e to sa+ than*+ou for all that +ou ha#e done for me so far, and *now that theres so

much more that +our gonna do for me still, for which i will ne#er be able to sa+ enough than*s,

and the same goes for Surinder Singh ji who has done something so big, i find it hard to (ut inwords and cant descibe m+ lo#e for his beautful charans so i ho(e to .uru !aharaaj to ma*e me

worth+ of all ur sangat and to remain fore#er than*ful and humble

2/8/0+

aheguroo ji *a *halsa aheguroo ji *i fateh ji

Sada Sada Sada Sada Satnaam

I do not feel doubt that Satnaam is the true and chosen name of our chojee (reetam at thismoment, but I cannot understand the im(ortance of aheguroo and wh+ most si*hs belie#e that

aheguroo is maharaajs chosen name and Sataam is not gi#en so much significance

I ha#e been greatl+ influenced b+ two brilliant gursi*hs that I ha#e ne#er met in (erson but ha#ebeen blessed to feel their (resence, and the+ are Sant &arnam Singh and Bhai Sahib 0andhir

Singh

ant i !ely :

I ha#e been greatl+ influenced b+ two brilliant gursi*hs that I ha#e ne#er met in (erson but ha#e

been blessed to feel their (resence, and the+ are Sant &arnam Singh and Bhai Sahib 0andhir

Singh

hese two 1ants where 2han 2han" but how do you now what 1habad did they meditated on; did they

really meditated on )aheguroo or 1atnaam we have a family friend who is in his late si:ties now and did1angat of Bhai 0andhir 1ingh Ji for over two years and was given 'handey 'i Pahul by Bhai 0andhir1ingh Ji" he meditated all his life for 8< years on the 1habad )aheguroo and didn!t mae much headwayon the spiritual path; and when he received the Gur Parsaad 1atnaam then within two years $aam wentin to his 0om 0om; it is very hard for a 1ant to give the Gur Parsaad; it is very hard to deliver the eternaltruth; it is very hard to serve the eternal truth" following might clean up your mind regarding the %uestionyou have in your mind9

Before an+ one else I *ee( their life lessons close to m+ heart, and ha#e used them to guide methrough m+ own journe+, but what confuses me is that the+ become one with


13/38

2/8/0+

+esterda+ after writing the email about m+ confusion o#er satnaam and #aheguroo i sat down to

do some bani and as i was reading su*hmani sahib this (auri caught me and *e(t me in its strong

hold

13


14/38

AstpdI 1asattapadhee==

Ashtapadee:

rn siq siq prsnhwr 1

charan sath sath parasanehaa

r ==His Lotus Feet are True, and True are those who touch Them.

p2jw siq siq syvdwr 1poojaasath sath saevadhaar ==

His devotional worship is True, and True are those who worship Him.

drsnu siq siq py3nhwr 1dharasan sath sath paehanehaar ==

The Blessing of His Vision is True, and True are those who behold it.

nwmu siq siq i-Awvnhwr 1

naam sath sath dhhiaavanehaar ==His aam is True, and True are those who meditate on it.

Awip siq siq sB -wrI 1aap sath sath sabh dhhaaree==

He Himself is True, and True is all that He sustains.

Awpy gu) Awpy gu)&wrI 1aapaegun aapaegunaaaree==

He Himself is virtuous goodness, and He Himself is the Bestower of virtue.

sbdu siq siq p4Bu b&qw 1sabadh sath sath prabh baathaa==

The !ord of His "habad is True, and True are those who spea# of $od.

suriq siq siq jsu sunqw 1surath sath sath jas sunathaa==

Those ears are True, and True are those who listen to His %raises.

bu#nhwr &au siq sB hoie 1bujhanehaar o sath sabh hoe ==

All is True to one who understands.

nwn& siq siq p4Bu soie 151naana sath sath prabh soe ==7==& ana#, True, True is He, the Lord $od. ''(''

in (articular the line 'aam sath sath dhi+a#anhar' and felt this feeling inside me as though m+uestions that i as*ed regarding Satnaam the chosen name was answered and felt as though it

trull+ is T&- 6&S- A!-"SATAA!

1:


15/38

all night i couldnt slee( but just wanted to sit and do simran of satnaam and this ambrosial necter

word *e(t me awa*e all night, usuall+ b+ 1 ocloc* m+ head begins to feel hea#+ and the bed

seems in#iting, but this time none of that ha((ened, although i didnt sit continousl+, the feelingwas absolutel+ magical and i felt so sad when the night was coming to an end and the da+ was

beginning

(lease do ardaas ma+ AAA4


16/38

im loo*ing for a job now, so bus+ gi#ing out m+ c# and filling out a((lication forms, thats

stressful, but i dont mind

famil+ (roblems, well e#er+ normal famil+ has them, so m+ famil+ is no e9ce(tion, tho i can

handle them much better than before, i lea#e all m+ worries with maharaaj and just do ardaas that

i ma+ e9(erience du*h and su*h as one and the same thing

if i wasnt tr+ing to mo#e on the (ath of total sach, i thin* id be a wrec* right now, its strange,

+ou thin* b+ becoming gursi*h u become untouchable from an+ (ain, or emotional cra(, butactuall+ +ou onl+ become more (rone to it, cos its this constant battle between wh+ doesnt god

hel( me and (lease god hel( if ur there, and that *ind of ma*es +ou feel ho(eless %i#e had

moments li*e that) and its the worst feeling in the world because +ou become ungrateful for all

that he has done

in one word m+ famil+ is lost, but im not sad, i actuall+ feel nothing for them, i mean i do care,

but theres no attachment, im actuall+ selfish as u can see

i just dont want to get in#ol#ed an+more, i just want sach, truth, honest+, lo#e, sadh sangat, i dontwant to mi9 with (eo(le that wear mas*s an+more, i m+self ha#e resigned from being some one i

*now i wasnt

im sorr+ i#e gone on a bit too much about m+self and famil+, reall+ i shud learn some self

controlsorr+ (aji

Satnaam Satnaam Satnaam Sada Sada Sada Sada Satnaam

/8/0+

SATAA! SATAA! SATAA! SATAA! SATAA! SATAA! SATAA! SA?A

SA?A SATAA!

im emailing after uite a while, it feels li*e a reall+ long time actuall+

i ha#e read the article u sent answering m+ uestions and now am read+ whene#er +ou for the

rest of the uestions to be answered on sat saro#ar, nine treasures and so on

though i was wondering, when were +ou blessed with gur(arsadi naam$

i feel as though i dont *now an+thing about +ou and often find m+self wondering man+ things

about +ou, and all ur e9(eriences when +ou begun on this (ath of Total truth enlightenment

does it ma*e a big difference ha#ing santji b+ +ou (h+sicall+

though in s(irit +ou can (robabl+ be with all those +ou ha#e hel(ed, i still feel a big ga( and feeluite far from +ou e#en s(irituall+

as +ou can see im not a #er+ enlightened soul, but just see* and beg for +our hel(, now that i

ha#e +ou i dont want to let +ou go, no matter what ha((ens

1C


17/38

(lease forgi#e us if i ha#e said something that dis(leases +ou, i reall+ dont mean to offend +ou, i

just want to *now +ou, is this 'want' wrong$

sada sada sada e*h oan*aar satnaam

ant i !ely :

It is very nice to see you moving on this path to eternity.

It looks like you are now calmed down fairly and your mind has become a lot more stable and out of desperationand frustration, which is very good, you have made good progress in a short period of time, but there is a lot to be

done to reach the ultimate, and this is all Gur Parsaad, this is your thirst for the spirituality that is making you feel

the time space, but at the same time you are now enjoying the eternal bliss on a continuous basis, so keep it up,

concentrate on Naam Simran, which will help you learn and understand every thing by yourself.

he physical means body and there should be no attachment with the body, body is !aya, the Param "yot # divine

light is the essence and is eternal, and that is most important thing, and that is always with you, and will always

guide you and help you under all circumstances, and if God wished and when the time comes we will meet eachother as well, but for doing $andgi and Seva physical presence should not be treated as a constrain, the key element

is your humbleness, humility, thirst for Naam $andgi and Seva, commitment, belief, faith, devotion and

unconditional love for Gur Guru and Gurbani, and that will take you to the spiritual heights, so please concentrateon Naam Simran and everything will fall in the right place for you.

!e will sta) with )ou as long as )our faith and trust is intact and #eeps on enhancing b) the second and)our Bandgi is complete and )ou have merged with A#al %ura#h.

/8/0+

Satnaam Satnaam Satnaam Sada Sada Satnaam

I find it reall+ strange and magical at the same time how sehaj naal truth is re#ealing itself to me

-#er+da+ I wa*e with a new desire to *now something or to just feel ins(ired to continue ja(ing

Satnaam and A*aal


18/38

ow this friend of mine is half

I often find m+self getting lost in certain lines of Su*hmani Sahib and sit there wondering whatcould !aharaaj mean, this feeling is uite amaing

sath naam prabh aasuhadhaaee==

The True ame of $od is the $iver of peace.

bisvaas sath naana gur thaepaaee==>==

ana# has obtained true faith from the $uru. ''*''

But then theres da+s when I feel aalsi, just (lain old la+ and I feel sad because I dont *now

how to get ins(ired to get u( and just a( his beautiful name, is there a cure for lainess$Bhai rai is man *o samja+ai

-h man aals *i+a *arai

.urmu*h naam dhi+a+ai

An+wa+s than* +ou for listening to me again, Im sorr+ if I anno+ +ou sometimes, I just want to

feel close to m+ onl+ Sangat, m+ onl+ Sadh Sangat

SATAA!

SATAA!

SATAA!SATAA!

SATAA!

SATAA!SATAA!

SA?A

SA?ASATAA!

Sant ji re(l+

ust be (ersistent and insistent in +our efforts and +ou will be blessed with the .ur ir(a ee( +our belief le#elhigher and higher, it is onl+ the trust that ma*es a difference, trust is li*e the Almight+ &imself, there is no

dimension of the trust, trust is the Bandgi, higher and higher trust goes, higher the higher Bandgi goes, it is onl+ the

trust that will bring +ou closer and closer to the Almight+, and the trust should be on the Satguru, on the Braham

.+an, on the bandgi, on the aam, on the Almight+, and so on, onl+ trust can win +ou o#er the


19/38

Sataam Sataam Sataam Sataam Sataam Sataam Sataam

Sada Sada Sataamji

im emailing because i ha#e a (roblem, and i dont *now how to tame it

basicall+ im ha#ing reall+ bad anger (roblems,

Baba ji 4678/ ( tra& 95:

?Before doing simran than *)*0Y sinlge person who has helped you

Have a thanful heart" thanful heart become s aloving heart

here are two crowns in the body - one of liberation" one of anger

+nside you you have a desire

its unfulfilled leads to anger

anger boils your blood and leads to health problems

the other thieves become activated and feed on the anger

then tuns into rage" that was the crown of desire

he other way is no desires" you accept everything as 1weet" end up with dish of ruth

nothing for the < thieves to eatand you have the crown of muti

*veryday do some assertions @+ free myself from any desire@

3ae yourself a chart

put five thieves on one side and negative %ualities and even giving in charity if it was given for selfpride ad

not with open heart

everyday in visualition throw them out with visualtion

and now no matter what negative things people say to him it doesn!t dwell in his brain and he goes to

sleep no problem

for A years baba ji practised throwing out every negative thought

when you meet people you may get negative energy

you will feel burning in your heart

so channel that energy down your legs out thru your feet ?

1+/08/0+

that is reall+ good adi#ce es(eciall+ the #isualition, i tried it last night and toda+ i feel muchbettercalmer

i thin* im gonna *ee( doing the #isualition thing, it was strange but after reading the ad#iceSantji ga#e i felt less agitated or stressed or angr+, but ha((+, almost e#en content

do +ou or did u e#er feel that wa+ just b+ reading his emails, do u thin* he does as ardaas o#er

e#er+ email to ha#e this effect$

i ha#e to sa+ i reall+ lo#e Santji, i dont e#en *nw what he is li*e in the dhuni+aa#i wa+ nor do i

want to *now,i just reall+ lo#e him for all that he has done for not just me but for +ou and man+

other true gursi*hswow>

1/8/0+

1


20/38

Sant ji re(l+

I* an*aar Satnaam Satgur


21/38

The energ+ is #er+ good, this is the cosmic energ+, this is the Amrit, that will clean +ou from inside, +ou need to

continue in to the third, fourth, fifth hours as +ou get more stable and are able to absorb this s(iritual energ+,

there are two doors in the (alms of +our feet and two doors in the (alms of +our hands, these are di#ine doors, and

+ou should o(en these doors and let the energ+ flow out through these doors7ou need to *ee( flowing this energ+continuousl+ through +our bod+, this is #er+ (owerful and sometimes it is hard to bear, but then +ou should let it

flow out and *ee( doing aam Simran 7our current bod+ is not clean enough to sustain this di#ine s(iritual energ+,

so that is wh+ +ou are unable to bear it but with more and more (ractice +ou will be able to reach a balance and be

able to absorb and retain and flow more and more of this s(iritual energ+, which is the real Amrit, the (ower ofaam mo#ing through +our entire bod+, +ou are fortunate, #er+ fortunate to be able to feel it so uic*l+, this is all

what .ur


22/38

i ha#e been ha#ing difficulties in the morning whilst doing aam simran with *ee(ing m+

dh+aan and ho(e +ou can shed some light on what im doing wrong or what im just not doing

6e have tried to e:plain you in the previous message" please read that carefully" read the writing on#rdaas for $aam 1imran very carefully and then do it" it is just a beginning for you" just be insistent"persistent and concentrate more on $aam 1imran" only $aam 1imran will bring more and more silence

and peace to your mind" which you are already e:periencing in the second hour and you will fell betterand better when you go in to longer sessions of meditation&

is there an ardaas that can hel( me before i begin doin Siman, i actuall+ dont do an+ s(ecific longardaas just as* for blessings from A*aal (ura*h to be shown the right wa+ of doin aam Simran

and forgi#eness

Yes" in the boo DHow to 2o $aam 1imranE&

is it just as im(ortant to read the (unj bani+a as it is to do naam simran$i often do it as follows,

aam simran for atleast an hour and then bani+a, but if naam simran can go on for longer, i will

do that, but i find it reall+ difficult to remain in concentration and let the aam simran just flow

o (lease, aam Simran is much abo#e reading and reciting .urbani, it much abo#e itnem=


23/38

1DFGDF:

7ou are doing great, just *ee( on s(itting whate#er is inside +ou until e#er+thing that is unreal is drained out, donthesitate to as* an+ uestions that bother +ou

dhan dhan


24/38

this is 2ubidha and a cause of distraction& .utside compliance is to attract outside world" insidecompliance is to attract #lmighty and get closer to the God&

but im scared to ta*e it off now, and what reall+ frea*ed me was when i heard naamjee#an (enji

too* that ste( and just listenin to e#er+one tal*, scared me i want to be totall+ in#isible and b+

ta*in that ste( ((l will tal*, not to mention m+ famil+ wont loo* at me the same i figure i loo* atme sister and i feel u(set wearing the dastaar for both me and her, we both ha#e not *e(t u( the

res(ect a dastaar should getnor ha#e we done the following=

*hoob teri (agri mithai tere bol

4o* 4aaj J (ublic gossi( is a !a+a *a hel, now do we care about 4o* 4aaj or we care about the

Truth, do we care to (lease .od or (lease the (eo(le, the abo#e Shalo* has been sung b+ aBraham .+ani in(raise of a Braham .+ani, and at that le#el there are no such ties, no Bandhans=

Braham .+ani Bandhan Te+ !u*ta Braham .+ani i irmal ugta, it is +our arni that is

im(ortant, and not the rituals and customs

as* m+ mum how mean i can be when im angr+

all this tal* is rather de(ressing for me and i choose to just ignore it and ma+be m+ feelingstowards wearing the dastaar will change, but when i thin* ba* as to wh+ i wore it in the first

(laceH m+ mind *nows it was for shallow reasons, but the han*aar lo#es to decei#e me and tell

me 'no no it was to be li*e gurus ladli fauj'$Guru!s adli ,auj is a Puran 'halsa only" and we have already told you what a Puran 'halsa is& Pleaseread that article on 'halsa again" it loos lie you are still not aware of the real divine definition of the'halsa" that will remove this illusion from your mind& # 1ada 1uhagan is a Puran 'halsa" a Puran BrahamGyani is a Puran 'halsa& Guru will love you only if you become a Puran 'halsa or at least try to become aPuran 'halsa&

but on a brighter note, i ha#e become much more ha((ier these last 2 w*s since i ha#e learnt of

Satnaam and been able to sit and just do simran %which i ne#er done before) and i told santji that

because of all these articles i#e been reading i#e started assessing all m+ actions

Just tae it easy" don!t worry about taing your 2astaar off for the time being and concentrate on $aam1imran" everything will change and happen in course of time" don!t get distracted by these thoughts" justconcentrate on doing Bandgi&

the other thing thats bothering me is that i feel li*e a fa*e when i wear the (unj *a*aar, as though

its a form of l+ing and decei#ing not onl+ me but othersi wish to remo#e them but then another

thought o#er(owers me and htat isthis is a test from maharaaj hes seeing if u are wea*butsurel+ i am not wea* if i be true to meself and othersT0/T& is high, but &I.&-0 STI44 is

truthful li#ing

he divine definition of a brave person is the one who has won over Panj 2oots" has no desires" no2ubidha" and completely won over 3aya& his what truthful living means&

2:


25/38

to tell +ou the truth its reall+ hard to undo all that +ou#e learnt when its been (ounded into

+ouso man+ (eo(le that u thought are (ossibl+ (onchai hoi told +ou that this wrong that is

right, and u#e tried ur best to belie#e and (ractise just that im sure u *now what i mean as u#e(robabl+ e9(erienced it

he mansion of truth can!t be build in a few wees time" it taes its own time" just eep on placing bric bybric and one day you will see the mansion has been built& he most important thing for you is toconcentrate on $aam 1imran and forget about everything else at this time" all your problems will start todisappear with time" just dedicate yourselves 7II to the Gur Guru and Gurbani and do your Bandgi withfull trust and faith&

i just want this whole (rocess of finding the truth to go smoothl+"but this (ath is difficult with

tests coming ur wa+ all the time and attac*s from the doots and ma+a on a continuous basis fromall directions but the onl+ difference is it will get easier to deal with as +ou de#elo( and go

further on the road the total Sach

*hani+o ti*hee #alo ni*i eth maarg chalna

You are absolutely right here" just eep on woring on the discovery of the truth and you will mae it forsure one day" just eep on praying for Gur Parsaad&

nimrita, #ishwaas, bharosa, (reeth, sharda, these words are so beauitful but i dont *now their

worth, i reall+ badl+ want to but due to m+ own e#il mindedness i cant gras( them

hese are all divine %ualities of a 1ada 1uhagan and they have no limits" no depth and dimensions" theyare unlimited lie Him C #lmighty and only $aam 1imran and doing Bani will bring these divine %ualitiesinside your Hirda&

i wish to our 6hojee


26/38

howe#er now that i ha#e a job i get #er+ tired and find it hard to wa*e at amrit #ela or to ma*e a

routine, routines are #er+ hard to ma*e and maintain is there some wa+ i can deal with this

(roblem$

than*+ou for +our time, ho(e to hear from +ou soon

Sant jis re(l+

I AAA0 SATAA! SAT./0


27/38

5//0+

satnaam ji *a *halsa satnaam ji *i fatehji

but i must sa+ it is uite e9citing to be (art of the sangat of a sant and to read the stories of

Babaji who is STI44 ali#ei just cant wait to get to us and as* him uestions or just sit nearhim and just feel his coolness his bliss and ha#e m+ soul eased and drenched in total stillness

tho i still feel a distance because of m+ own ignorance so i cant feel the closeness as much aswhat u and others who ha#e met both babaji and sant ji in (erson feel, but m+ da+ will come

tooinfact i#e started to sa#e u( mone+m+ mamaji in amree*a told me flights are chea(est

during ct so i want to go then e#en if its just for a wee*>

i dont mind u editting the emails i sent whate#er hel(s others the same wa+ u and other jans ha#e

hel(ed me

i dont s(ea* to K and 7 an+moreonce i came bac* from india i found out about man+ secretsand lies and felt i must detach m+self from thembut it was the most amaing (aji

i wanted to tell u this before but wasnt sure, but u#e sed it first so i willK was more than a

sister to me she (la+ed the role of a (arent best friend and s(iritual com(anion and to ha#e lost

that reall+ threw me into a cold dar* (it but i didnt remain their long as i was sheltered under thecomforting and (owerful wing of santjiA*aal


28/38

m+ job is going well i too* the ad#ice of a Satjan on the egrou( to imagine doing dandhouth to

e#er+one at wor* it has wor*ed wonders i feel ha((+ and comfortable at wor*, further more m+

mum has begun showing interest in naam simran, just toda+ she said she wanted to sit down forhalf an hour and do just simran in surat and we did and we felt (eace afterwards

than*+ou for e#er+thing ji

5//0+

sant ji toda+ mum told me she went to baljinder (ajis house %harjit (aji *nows him im not sure if

u do) but she saw a #ideo there of Babaji and other jans doing simran and she said it loo*ed li*e

the+ were going mad, li*e grown (eo(le beha#ing li*e children and she dis(la+ed a lot of

distress and confusion towards the #ideo when she described it to me

i told her i too ha#e come under the shelter of a great sant and am #er+ ha((+ she was (leased

but said not to mention it to an+one else

i cudnt e9(lain to her how great it was that we are fortunate to ha#e been blessed with the

com(an+ and su((ort of truth and true ser#ants of A*aal


29/38

than&s

!anbirs re(l+

+eh i wish gurdwarai would just ooe with that same (owerful energ+

i e9(lained to m+ mum that it is strange becuase its not the norm when i use to do *irtan i would

feel great (ower generating inside me and m+ #oice would just go #er+ loud and high (itched itfelt out of m+ control and and she comented on it b+ sa+ing i sound li*e im being (ossessed m+

e#il s(irits, i felt hurt but didnt mind, but i ho(e she too will feel the same wa+ one da+ too

i then e9(lained the beha#iour as how anita was beha#ing after gi#en naam when she wass(ea*ing to naamjee#an (enji on the (honebecuase the dirt inside didnt want to be remo#ed

and so she was a bit dislodged on the (hone

it would hel( tho if i cud ha#e m+ famil+ su((orting me i was goin to tell them in m+ own time

when i felt more stable and *nw m+ facts and made the foundations strong on what the truth is

b+ dee(ening m+ own belief but this is all new still(lease do ardaas to A*aal


30/38

you are dhan dhan

may a&al pura&h bless you with so muh haddi &alaa that the world will never have seensuh a bright soul before.

..rangaan valaa jeh rangaaa@ aasaa rang naa deet

...if the -yer dyes us@ then no one will have seen a olour li&e that before

.....the pure white bright love light of the Supreme 8ight @ 7aram #yot@ the 0ully Bright ne 7ooran 7ra&aash

8//0+

baljinder (ajis brother basicall+ said to m+ mum that sant ji s(ea*s onl+ truth and hes totall+true, he has a direct line to a*aal (ura*h and *nows just about e#er+thing

she also said that +outh toda+ dont li*e ta*ing the long and arduous route the+ (refer the direct

route straight to satnaam #aheguroo and so Babaji is (erfect in that sense he can get +ou to thatdestination

mum also said that 'naamjee#an *ol loh hagi +a' i dont *now what that entirel+ means but imguessing aamjee#an is T&-0->

7/0 !/! IS SA7I. S&- 6A S-- 4I.&T A!--A I " S&- ISABS4/T-47 0I.&T " ;&AT !0-


31/38

ive never really begun an email with asing how are you&&but theres a first time to everything&&&&&

how are you 1at 1antji6e are doing great and wish you all success in your pursuit to the discovery of the truth&

my job is going well i too the advice of a 1atjan on the egroup to imagine doing dandhouth to everyone

at wor it has wored wonders i feel happy and comfortable at wor" further more my mum has begun

showing interest in naam simran" just today she said she wanted to sit down for half an hour and do just

simran in surat and we did and we felt peace afterwards&

his is what maes the difference9 'ar 2andaut Punn 6adda Hai" this is what it means by doing Gurbaniin your real life& he more you bring Gurbani in and do it the more you will be rewarded" the reward isinstantaneous" Gurbani is all 1#" it is the *ternal Prescription for removing all your mental and physicalailments and mae your 2ehi as pure as 1atnaam" that is what 1atnaam needs to reside in" and that iswhere 1atnaam resides& +t is really good to now about your 3om but don!t involve yourselves with anydiscussion or argument with her" just concentrate on your Bandgi" if you are able to complete your Bandgiand achieve salvation in this life" all your family will reap the reward of your Bandgi" not only that coming7 generations will reap the reward of your Bandgi&

3inbir Ji have also been e:periencing this cosmic energy" it is the divine energy" it is the #mrit that startsto flow inside your body in order to clean you up completely from inside" to activate all your seven centersof spiritual energy C 1at 1arovar" these are 1madhee #ssans and the practice of cleaning goes on in1madhee" when the body is overwhelmed with #mrit" some people start to dance in bliss" it is notintentional" it happens by itself" the limbs start to move by themselves&

This is another lesson to be learned, as +ou said nothing is in +our control, +our bod+ is totall+

ta*en o#er b+ the Almight+ &imself, it is the di#ine (ower that ma*es +our #oice loud and so is

the case with the #ideo she saw, when the Sangat starts to chant Satnaam, it (racticall+ goes out

of control of e#er+ one, some will start shouting at a #er+ high (itch of their #oiceH some will go

into dee( #airaag and start to cr+ and wee(, some will start to dance, some will go into dee(

trance J Sunn Smadhee and so on, e#er+ones Bandgi is uniue, e#er+ ones Smadhee is uniue

too, but ultimate is the highest bliss stage which is called 6had ?i ala= ala is the


32/38

God bless you with all inds of strengths and spiritual power to face this war against 3aya" Bandgi iswaging a war against 3aya" and you will emerge as a 1ant Hirda ultimately" just concentrate on $aam1imran" more you do $aam 1imran more easy will be your journey to 1ach 'hand&

1*//0+

last frida+ %1F Se( F:) sat sangat was absolutel+ fantastic, though i didnt s(ea* much afterwardsi was just silenced, li*e within i wanted to just hold on to the (re#ious moments and b+ s(ea*ing

the+ ma+ get lost, i also felt o#erwhelmed b+ the whole e9(erience, seeing e#er+one after such a

long time was uite wow aswell b+ the wa+ can i get a co(+ of the cd aswell ji$

jas(al (aji and naamjee#an were s(ea*ing to me and i was uite rude as i didnt reall+ res(ond

(articularl+ well, and when i got home i felt bad, but also sad

this (ainsta*ing se(eration was felt and since then e#er+ e#ening i#e been wanting to ha#e

another simran (rogramme, i#e got through this wee* with the thought of frida+ %i sound

des(erate) but it reall+ was just the warmest feeling i#e had in ages i had millions of uestions i

wanted to as* e#er+one but li*e i said i was just silenced from within, s(eechless

the bowing to one another was une9(ected i dont recall +ou telling me thats how u do it, I toowanted too, but,i *now u shudnt care for others o(inions but i felt u might thin* of me being

(assi#e and not ma+be meaning it if i done it too so i just imagined it in m+ mind

its just often when doin simran i feel li*e bowing to the sangat and imagine doing it in m+ mind

too, but no one has e#er taught me that its o* if u do it (h+sicall+ and so it will ta*e a lil getting

use to

howe#er when i got home and man+ da+s later i still felt warmth within and stronger +earning

for the adhaar of satnaam,satguru and satsangatthan*+ou>

satnaam satnaam satnaam

satnaam satnaam satnaamsatnaam sada sada satnaam

18/0/0+

Sant is re(l+ %in 6a(itals)

I AAA0 S&0I SATAA! I I 5AT-&

?&A ?&A S&0I


33/38

.? B4-SS 7/ ;IT& 6&A? ?I A4A= AA AA! 6&A? ?I A4A, IT 6!-S

47 I SA6& &A?, A 6TI//S STAT- 5 -T-0A4 B4ISS, A 6TI//SSA!A?&I, A !-0.-0 ;IT& I0./ SA0


34/38

when she remo#ed her hands i felt soothed all o#er, i earlier had low bac* (ains and the+ were

eliminated e#er+ones face was shining reall+ bright, and imagined bowing to e#er+one though i

wanted to (h+sicall+ do it too

T&IS IS T&- 0-A4 ?II- .I5T 5 A!0IT A? ./0


35/38

T&-S- A0- /TSI?- 0IT/A4S 0 S7!B4S, T&-7 &A- T&I. T ? ;IT&

7/0 ISI?- .A!-, T&- 0-A4 0-&IT IS T&- ISI?- 0-&IT, T&- 0-&IT 5

6L/-0I. 7/0 !I?, ;II. -0


36/38

anne bhenjee baba ji says "follow your heart" God is in your heart @ follow the ruth !etells you@ smash all your inhibitions@ laugh@ smile@ sing@ lap@ open your arms and hug thewhole wide world@ ma&e your heart so big @ innite as satnaam ji@ and then you will &now theheart of guru nana& maharaj@ then you will &now the heart of all 5> gurus@ all bhagtas@ allsants@ all brahmgianis@ you will &now ruth.

he sangat is yours to be free and do what your heart says.

%e ould also see your fae was shinging ..nana& te mu&h ujalay@ and by holding your feetwe will all be ferried aross ..&etee shutee naal

A thief sees everyone else as a thief@ so see everyone else as a sant and you will beomesant heart too.

as(als re(l+=

3unbir jee"

$amjeevan was saying that you have brought a new energy to the sangat and she (as we all are5 is very

happy that you have joined the sangat& 1he said that when she placed her hand on your head she said

that she saw a heart that was broen" she e:pressed that she felt lie hugging and issing you (but wasn@t

sure if you would feel uncomfortable5" it is great that you write that you felt that the pain" sadness had

gone away& 1he says that she feels alot of love for you& 1he feels that you have just one goal - and that

is to meet and merge with + .anaar 1atnaam&

6e would lie to say that we also feel very happy to have your sangat" you love and yearning taes me

bac to my childhood and the feeling of really really really wanting to meetKplay with God& han you&

Baba jee says that 1at 1angat is beunt (heaven on earth5 and in this sangat + really feel that&

3ay + be able to serve you all with what little + have to offer&

,orever be in peace& ,orever ruth&&&&

2ec I8

Smadhi

;hen the #eil of illusion was lifted I saw someone

&is (resence was o#erwhelming his face shone li*e the sun

Bathing me in a feeling I ha#e ne#er felt before


37/38

There was this unrecognisable energ+ running in m+ blood

Standing before him I felt na*ed as though he could see all m+ sins

But he sim(l+ smiled ma*ing the shine warmer on m+ s*in

I couldnt understand it but I felt the urge to lie flat in front of him

As I did I as*ed Mcould this moment last fore#er, from within

&e hel(ed me u( and (laced his hand o#er m+ e+es

Then in the ne9t few moments I could feel m+ bod+ rise

The sensation felt inside was difficult to describe

But when he remo#ed his hand we were soaring in the s*+

&e too* me to a (lace where (eo(le sat in a circle filled with light

It was so bright it felt li*e a sunn+ da+, but loo*ing u( it was night

5rom e#er+ face this illuminating bright light came

Then in a whis(er around the circle #ibrated MTrue ame

After this whis(er there was total silence and stillness

ne whis(ered M&e is (resent and the light increased in brilliance

Then there was just silence surrounding and absorbing e#er+thing

ot a single thing stirred, while the light *e(t on strengthening

3E


38/38

;hilst sitting in the com(an+ of enlightened s(irits

!ind and soul go be+ond the finite limits

All that I *new once is somehow gone

But re(laced b+ a new understanding to build u(on

!anbir ji 2G dec F:

manbir's journey to gurprasadi naam - 2003

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