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#1 New York Times Bestselling Author

Ken BlanchardCoauthor, The One Minute Manager®

Susan FowlerLaurence Hawkins

SelfLeadership

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MinuteManager

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Increasing Effectiveness ThroughSituational Self Leadership

Discover the Magicof No Excuses

USA 819.95

CANADA 824.95

SelfLeadership

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Ken Blanchard's phenomenal bestselling classicThe One Minute Manager explores the skillsneeded to become an effective self leader. Now,

Self Leadership and the One Minute Managerclearly and thoroughly reveals how power, freedom, and autonomy come from having the rightmind-set and the skills needed to take personalresponsibility for success.

In this captivating business parable, numberone New York Times bestselling author KenBlanchard, with coauthors Susan Fowler and

Laurence Hawkins, tells the story of Steve, ayoung advertising executive who is about tolose his job. During a series of talks with a giftedmagician named Gayla, Steve comes to realizethe power of taking responsibility for his situation and not playing the victim. Passing along theknowledge she has learned from the One MinuteManager, Gayla teaches Steve the three skillsof self leadership. These three techniques notonly empower him to keep his job but show himwhat he needs to know in order to keep growing,learning, and achieving.

For twenty-five years, millions of managersin Fortune 500 companies and small businessesnationwide have followed Ken Blanchard's man

agement method, thus increasing their productivity, job satisfaction, and personal prosperity.Now, discover Ken Blanchard's newest techniquesin Self Leadership and the One Minute Managerand experience the profitability that has beenachieved by applying his management lessons.

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Empowerment Is Something

Someone Gives You.

Self Leadership Is

What You Do

To Make It Work.

THE KEN BLANCHARD COMPANIES

SITUATIONAL SELF LEADERSHIP MODEL

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Copyright © 2005 The Ken BlanchardCompanies. AllRights Reserved.Do Not Duplicate. For individual copies of the Color Model please contactThe Ken Blanchard Companiesat www.Kenblanchard.com or phone us at800-728-6000.

SelfLeadership

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Manager

Books byKen BlanchardTheSecret(with Mark Miller),2004Customer Mania! (withJimBallardand Fred Finch), 2004

The On-Time, On-Target Manager(with SteveGottry), 2004The Leadership Pill (with MarcMuchnick), 2003

Full Steam Ahead! (with Jesse Stoner),2003

The Servant Leader (with Phil Hodges),2003

The One Minute Apology (with MargretMcBride), 2003

ZaptheGaps! (withDanaRobinsonandJim Robinson), 2002WhaleDone!® (with Thad Lacinak,ChuckTompkins, andJim Ballard),2002

The Generosity Factor (with S.TruettCathy),2002HighFive! (with Sheldon Bowles),2001Management ofOrganizationalBehavior: Leading Human Resources(with Paul Hersey andDewey Johnson),8th edition, 2001

BigBucks! (with SheldonBowles), 2000The One Minute Manager Builds HighPerforming Teams (with Don Carewand Eunice Parisi-Carew), 2nd edition,2000

Leadership by the Book (withBillHybels andPhilHodges), 1999

Books by Susan FowlerEmpowerment: Achieving PeakPerformance Through SelfLeadership(with Ken Blanchard), 1998

The Team Leaders Idea-A-Day Guide:250 Ways to MakeYourTeam MoreEffective EveryDayoftheYear(withDreaZigarmi), 1997

The Heart ofa Leader, 1999GungHo!®(with Sheldon Bowles),1998

Managing by Values® (with MichaelO'Connor), 1997

Mission Possible (with Terry Waghorn),1997

Empowerment Takes Morethan aMinute (withJohnP. Carlos andAlanRandolph), 2nd edition,1996Everyone's a Coach (with Don Shula),1995

We Are the Beloved, 1994

RavingFans®(with Sheldon Bowles),1993

Playing theGreat Game ofGolf, 1992The One Minute Manager Meets theMonkey (with William Oncken, Jr.,and Hal Burrows), 1989

The Power ofEthical Management(with Norman Vincent Peale), 1988

The One Minute Manager Gets Fit(with D.W. Edington andMarjorieBlanchard), 1986

Leadership andthe OneMinuteManager (with Patricia Zigarmi andDrea Zigarmi),1985Putting theOne Minute Manager toWork (with Robert Lorber), 1984

The One Minute Manager® (withSpencer Johnson), 1982

Mentoring: How to Cultivate the MostImportant Relationship ofYourCareer, 1992

OvercomingProcrastination, 1991

SelfLeadership

MinuteManager

Increasing Effectiveness ThroughSituational Self Leadership

Ken Blanchard

Susan Fowler

Laurence Hawkins

WILLIAM MORROW

An Imprint ofHsmperCoHmsPublishers

Grateful acknowledgment ismade to Bristol Park Books for permission toreprint "The Business Card Trick" from The Mammoth Book ofFun andGames by Richard B. Manchester. Copyright ©1976 by Hart PublishingCompany, Inc.

SELF LEADERSHIP AND THE ONE MINUTE MANAGER. Copyright © 2005by Blanchard Family Partnership, Susan Fowler, and Laurie Hawkins. Allrights reserved. Printed in the United States ofAmerica. No part ofthisbook may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever withoutwritten permission except in the case of brief quotations embodied incritical articles and reviews. For information address HarperCollinsPublishers Inc., 10 East 53rd Street, NewYork, NY10022.

HarperCollins books may be purchased for educational, business, orsales promotional use. For information please write: Special MarketsDepartment, HarperCollins Publishers Inc., 10 East 53rd Street, NewYork, NY 10022.

Printed on acid-freepaper

Library ofCongress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

Blanchard, Kenneth H.Selfleadership and the one minute manager: discover the magic ofno

excuses!: increasing effectiveness through situational selfleadership /Ken Blanchard,SusanFowler, Laurence Hawkins.—1st ed.

p. cm.

ISBN0-06-079912-9 (alk. paper)1. Leadership. 2. Self-management (Psychology). 3. Management.

I. Fowler, Susan, 1951- . II. Hawkins, Laurence. III. Title.

HD57.7.B5632 2005

650.1—dc22 2004065628

06 07 08 09 dix/qwf 10 9 8 7 6 5

To my mother, Dorothy Blanchard,who taught me how to take control ofmy own life

before someone elsedid.—Ken Blanchard

To my wonderful parents, Phyllis and Dick,who helped me realize the magic ofselfleadership

by encouraging my curiosity, independence,and love oflearning.—Susan Fowler

To my three daughters, Genevieve, Ashley, andJuliet,with thefondest hope that they may be beneficiaries

ofthese selfleadership concepts and toolsand immerse themselves in the good life.

—Laurie Hawkins

Contents

Introduction byKen Blanchard xi

1 Do You Believe in Magic? 12 People Are Not Mind Readers 183 ElephantThinking 284 Cycles of Power 435 Diagnose Yourself 656 Getting What You Need 817 RunningTogether 948 No Excuses 115

9 One Minute Magic 136

Appendix: The Business Card Trick 147Acknowledgments 149About the Authors 151

Services Available 155

Introduction

In the last decade or so, the old deal in business haschanged. In the past, the workforce traded loyalty forjob security. If you showed up to work, made a goodeffort, and stayed out of trouble, you were usuallysecure in yourjob. When I graduated from college inthe early 1960s, oneofmy friends gotajobwith AT&Tandcalled home. His mother cried with joy. "You're setfor life," she said.

Are you set for life today with any organization?No! Lifetime employment is a thing of the past. Overthe last number of years, I've been trying to find outwhat the new deal is. Talking to top managers aroundthe world, I've asked, "If it's not loyalty you wantfromyour workforce today, what do you want?" The answers have been pretty universal: "I want people whoare problem solvers and are willing to take initiative.I want people working for me who act like they ownthe place."

In other words, top managers, given a choice,would like empowered people—individuals they canrespect and trust to make good business decisions,whether top managers are aroundor not.

Does the workforce object to that? No! In fact,I've asked people, "What doyou want from an organi-

xii I Introduction

zation ifjobsecurity isnolonger available?" Again, theanswers have been prettyuniversal. Peopletoday wanttwo things. First, theywant honesty. "Don't lie to us.Don't tell us at one point there will be no layoffs andthen turn around a few months later and lead a majordownsizing."

Second, people want opportunities to constandylearn new skills. "At some point, if I have to lookfor a new job—either inside or outside my presentorganization—I want to have better skills andbe morevaluable than I was before." Whatbetter way to becomemore valuable than to be able to take initiative, becomeaproblem solver, andactandthink like anowner.

Bingo! We have agreement. Thenwhat's theproblem? Most people will argue that most managers arenot willing to let go, that they still want to maintaincontrol. Thesemanagers talk a good game but theystillwantto be incharge andprefergood subordinates whofollow the lead of their superiors. Today's reality inthe world ofwork suggests that managers today, if theyare to be effective, must think and act in differentways. In the 1980s, a manager typically supervised fivepeople—the span of control was one manager to fivedirect reports. To be competitive, organizations todaymust be customer driven, cost effective, fast, flexible,and continuously improving. This has led to moremean-and-lean organizational structures where spans

Introduction I xiii

of control have increased considerably. It is not uncommon today to find one manager for twenty-fiveto seventy-five direct reports. Add to that the emergence of virtual organizations—where managers arebeing asked to supervise people they never meet face-to-face—and we have an entirely different landscapeemerging in the world ofwork.

The traditional hierarchy of leadership hasevolved into a new order: empowerment of individuals. Theproblem is nolonger how to getmanagers to"letgo"—they have no choice anymore. The problemis howto get people to grab holdand run with the ballthat isbeinghanded to them.

Anumberofpeople are taking to this empoweredenvironment like ducks to water. But many more arebecoming immobilized. In that state they act like victims, think empowerment is a four-letter word, andview theirmanager as anincompetent enemy. You hearpeople complaining, "My boss hasn't done this; myboss hasn't done that!" The truth is that most bosses

today can no longer play the traditional role of tellingpeople what, when, and how to do things. Managersjust don't have time, and in many cases their peopleknow more about the work thantheydo.

What's the solution? How can we help peoplemove from a victim mind-set to flourishing as empowered problem solvers and decisionmakers?

xiv I Introduction

Enter Susan Fowler and Laurie Hawkins.

Whenmywife, Margie, andI startedour companyin 1979 (we now have a U.S. workforce of more than250 people and affiliates in more than thirty nations),our first consulting partner was Laurie Hawkins. Wehad worked with him at the University of Massachusetts, Amherst, in the early 1970s, when I was a full-timeprofessor and Margie was finishing her doctorate.When we decided to become entrepreneurs, Lauriewas ready, willing, and able to throw his hat into thering. Over the years, Laurie has become one of ourbest teachers, coaches, and consultants of our coretechnology: Situational Leadership® II.

Recognizing that there is no best leadershipstyle—it all depends on the situation—we have beenteaching managers all over the world to be situationalleaders in working one-on-one with their people aswell asin leading peoplein teams.

Susan Fowlerwas already anaccomplished trainerwhen she attended a Situational Leadership II seminarbeing taught by Laurie Hawkins. She grew excitedabout how situational leadership can not only be applied to the one-on-one and team contexts, but alsoto self leadership. She felt that this framework heldthe answer to helping people take the lead when theydidn't have the power—when someone else was theirmanager. Susan got Laurie excited about Situational

Introduction I xv

Self Leadership and he, in turn, introduced me toSusan. The rest is history. With Susan's lead, Situational Self Leadership has become one of our threecore leadership technologies and an invaluable aid tohelping people find thepower in empowerment.

With SelfLeadership and the One Minute Manager, William Morrow has completed publication ofour leadership trilogy, which started with Leadershipand the One Minute Manager and The One MinuteManager Builds High Performing Teams.

The parable you are about to read tells the storyof a rising ad executive by the name of Steve, whobecomes immobilized byhis new responsibilities. Sittingin a cafe writing his resignation letter, Steve meetsCayla, the essence of Situational Self Leadership.Using magic to underscore her points, Cayla teachesSteve the three tricks ofselfleadership.

Enjoy the story. I think you'll root for Steve as hemakes the journey to self-mastery. More important,learn the three tricks of selfleadership, because theywill helpyou andeveryone you work with. Take chargeofyour life atwork, at home, andinyour community.

My biggest fear is that you will read the storyand think the revelations apply to someone else. Sure,it's Steve'sstory. But isn't it yours, too?

—Ken Blanchard

SelfLeadership

JKlthe

MmuteManager

Do You Believe in Magic?

JUefore I present you with the televisioncommercials, print ads, and radio scripts that we haveprepared for you, let me explain the underlyingthinkingthat went into youradvertising campaign."

After months of work, this was the moment Stevehad been working so hard for—his first campaignproposal. Andhe was scared to death.

Steve distributed the spiral-bound proposal to theelevenvicepresidents, and then handed one to Roger,the President of United Bank. The ten men and two

women sitting in the semicircle in front of him werehis clients, and they would decide if his advertisingcampaign was acceptable for the upcoming year.

2 I Do You Believe in Magic?

Steve directed them to the budget section ofthe proposal, forwarding his PowerPoint slides tosupport his presentation. He detailed the percentagesof the budget allocated to the creative design,production expenses, andmedia buys. He outHned themedia recommendations and the rationale behind

each one.

No one asked any questions, and Steve sensedthey were just waiting to see the creative approach.The energy in the room seemed to shift as he pulledseveral large foam-core posters from his oversizedpresentation case and declared, "Since there seem tobe no questions regarding the budget, let me moveon to the creative approach we're recommending fortelevision, print, radio, and direct mail."

Steve heldupthestoryboards depicting importantframes from the television commercials and the hand-

sketched layouts for the print ads. He projected theaccompanying scripts and ad copyonto the screen.

After reading the radio scripts aloud, Steve satdown, took adeep breath, and waited tohearwhat theythought. There was anawkward pause until oneoftheVPs said, "You took a much lighter approach than Ithought you would, but maybe that's good—it projectsa friendly bank."

Another VP spoke up. "You've obviously put a lotoftimeandeffort intothis campaign."

Do You Believe in Magic? 13

After another awkward silence, all heads turned tothe center of the semicircle asRogerannounced, "Thisis garbage."

Everyone was stunned. No one looked at Steve,who went blank. He didn't know how to respond. Henodded his head up and down as though he weretrying to shake out a thought. Realizing he had to saysomething, he mindlessly began gatheringthe boards.

"I guess we've missed the mark," he said. "I'll goback and talk to the creative team. I'll be back in touch

next week."

Steve didn't remember howhe got to his car. Hefound himself driving—but not back to the agency.There was no way he could face his creative team.Thank heaven his boss, Rhonda, was out of town. Heneeded to find a place where he could be alone andthink. He also needed a good cup of coffee. Drivingthrough an unfamiliar neighborhood, he happenedupon a place calledCayla's Cafe. He went in, hoping tofind relief.


He gazed around the bookstore cafe with its solidwoodtables and matching heavy woodchairs. It was avery different place from the high-tech chrome andhigh energy of the ad agency. He found solace in thecave-like coolness, and at the same time was warmedby the smell of coffee mingled with newsprint. Heliked being surrounded by shelves piled high withbooks and magazines, and hoped they could ease thedilemma nagging at him. He knew he had to facethe facts. Whathadgone wrong? Howdid things get sofar off track?

Steve ordered a cafe mocha and let the warmth of

the mugseep into his palms before taking the first sip.Afterthis latestfiasco, he was sure to be fired. Frankly,as he thought about it, he was surprised he had gottenthis far.

Three years ago Steve felt as thoughhe'd wonthelottery. Rhonda, cofounder ofthe Creative AdvertisingAgency, had hired him straight out of college witha degree in marketing. He'd taken an entry-levelposition and quicklyworked hisway to leadproductionmanager in charge of several large accounts. Lastyearhe'd served as coproducer of the industry's awardsprogramfor outstanding ad campaigns.


Four months ago, Steve felt flattered whenRhonda gave him the opportunity to bypass thetypical career path as a junior account exec on a largeraccount and take the account exec role on a small but

well-regarded account—United Bank. Rhonda toldSteve that she wanted to empower him, and that thiswas the perfect time to do so.

Steve saw his promotion as his chance to provehimself. Ifhe could make a mark with United Bank, hecould soon take on the more prestigious, big-budgetaccounts.

Or so he had thought. Now his confidence wasshattered and his future in question. The meetinghadunnerved him. The more he thought about the bankpresident's reaction, the angrierhe got.

In a blinding flash of the obvious, Steve realizedthe real source of his failure—it was Rhonda. She'd

abandoned him. Where was she when he needed

her—when everything was falling apart? Why hadn'tshe warned him that the client was a nightmare, thatthe copywriter on his team was a whiner, and thatthe art director was an egomaniac? Rhonda was theone person who could have saved him from thishumiliation, but instead, she'd "empowered" him. Hehad trusted her and she'd fed him to the wolves.

61 Do You Believe in Magic?

Nowthat he had provedto be a failure, Stevewassure Rhonda would fire him. He decided to beat her

to the punch. She wouldn't fire him—he'd quit! Hepulledout a yellow legal pad andpen to begindraftinghis resignation letter.

He was just writing the first sentence when hisattention was drawn to a group of young childrentrying to muffle their laughterastheygathered under arustic sign claiming the area as Cayla's Magic Corner.He watched as a small, intense, black woman moved infrontof the children andsatdown on a simple woodenstool facing them. She rested her forearms on herthighs and leanedclose to them. Notsaying aword,sheslowly gazed at each child with direct eye contact.Steve couldhave heard a pin drop.

"I am Cayla," she said softly and very slowly,enunciating each word as though revealing a greatmystery. "AndI am a magician."

She told them about an old Indian mystic whotaught her the art ofmindovermatter. Todemonstrate,she pulled out two rubber bands, entwined themtogether, and pulled and tugged to show that theycouldnot be easily separated.

Milking the taleforall it was worth, Cayla claimedshe couldseparatethe two bandsusing onlythe powerofher mind—and then she did so. The children roared

their approval. It was trulymagical.

Do You Believe in Magic? I 7

Steve regained his focus and went back to writinghis resignation letter, losing track oftime.

"Didyou enjoy the magic?"The voice jolted him out of his deep

concentration. Steve looked upandsaw Cayla standingbeside him. He rose awkwardly andheldouthis hand.

"Sorry, I hope you didn't mind—it was fun towatch you. You're agood magician. My name isSteve."

"Mind? Not at all," the woman said as shereturned the handshake. "I was hoping you'd join in.Myname is Cayla."

"That's your real name?"Cayla smiled. "Yes, it really is. My parents loved

the name because it means 'empowered' in Hebrew.Maybe that's where I getmy magical powers," shesaidwith a laugh.

Steve gaveher a wistful smile. "I remember whenI beheved inmagic. I also remember how disappointedI was when I realized there was no such thing as magic.But don't get me wrong—I still appreciate the skillbehind the tricks."

"You don't believe in magic," she said with a sigh."Too bad, because it looks as though you could usesome."


Steve was too startled to reply. He'd had no ideahe was that transparent. Cayla pulleda chairoverfromthe adjacent table andsatdown, motioning forSteve tosit as well.

"Listen," she said, gazing at Steve with the sameintense eye contact she'd given the children earlier."You are obviously a businessman, yet here youare inthis bookstore at midday. You've barely touched yourcoffee and scone. Something isbotheringyou."

Encouraged by her compassionate smile, StevetoldCayla his sadstory, beginning with his excitementandpride at being given his own client after less thanthree years withthe company.

"But it wasn't long before my dream turned intoa nightmare," he explained. "Even in the initial clientmeetings we struggled to establish an advertisingbudget. I had developed media and productionbudgets in the past, but I couldn't tell the client whatwas appropriate for them. Nothing in those earlymeetings confirmed their good first impression of meor the agency—and itwentdownhill from there.

"There was no budget, no goals, and no strategy.I didn't know howto direct mycreative team withoutan agreed-upon advertising strategy. The client drovemecrazy—no onecould agree onanything!"


Cayla noddedthoughtfully as shelistenedto Stevepour out his side of the failed client relationship."What about your creative team? Did theyhelp?" sheasked.

"Oh, they're another story. Creative people areworse than spoiled children. I tried to give themdirection, butitwas like herding cats. When they askedfor more specifics, I tried to explain that the clientcouldn't agree on a strategy. Butit all fell on deafears.They just told methat it was my jobto figure outwhatthe client wants, even if the client isn't sure! How am Isupposed to do that? Finally, I demanded they comeup with something—anything—that I could show theclient. Sotheydid."

"I'm afraid to ask. . ." Cayla's statement trailedinto silence.

"That's why I'm here. It was a fiasco. The clienthated it. Heck, I hated it. I knew it was nogood, but itwas all I had." Steve was holding his head in his handsas though the burden was too much to contemplate."I'm sick to death of the whole creative process. I'mnot creative, so I have to depend on my team, andthey're totally undependable! It puts me in a no-winsituation. How am I supposed to manage the creativeprocess when I'm not creative?"

Cayla pressed on. "So what doyou do now?"


"I'm writing my resignation letter," Steve saidmatter-of-factly.

"Hmm," Cayla said thoughtfully. "Quitting?""Yeah, beforeI get fired," Steve responded."Why don't you go to your boss for help?" Cayla

asked.

"It's too late. What can Rhonda do now? We're

probably going to lose theclient—and she'll blame me,eventhoughit's not myfault."

"Whose faultis it?"Cayla asked.Steve shook hishead, feeling evenmore betrayed

byRhonda. "Isn't itobvious?When Rhonda abandonedme, it all fell apart. Now I've even lost confidence inthe things I used to do well, like budgets, media, andproduction. I didn't realize advertising is such a dog-eat-dogworld. It's notlike I thought itwould be,"Stevelamented.

"Just like the magic," Cayla interjected. "Youloved magic when you were naive and could suspendyour disbelief. But now you are disillusioned by it,because you realize there's a trick behindthe magic."

"I'm not sure there's any trickbehind succeedingin this business. If there is, no one has bothered toshowme," Stevesaiddefiantly.

"If you don't mind me saying so, it sounds asthough you're full of excuses—a poor victim ofcircumstance."


Cayla's comment struck Steve as harsh and hereplied defensively. "What do you mean, 'a victim ofcircumstance'?"

"I mean aperson who refuses totake responsibilityfor the situation he's in. It's easier to blame everyoneelse around you, rather than taking responsibility foryourself," Cayla replied without apology.

"Holdon. You can't blame me for what's happened.Rhonda's expectations were unfair. I didn't get thesupport I needed from her or from the creative team—I could goon and on," Steveasserted.

"So," continued Cayla, "Rhonda should haveknown better than to delegate the account toyou andgive you the freedom to do your job, right?"

Steve was a little annoyed—and surprised—at theturn the conversation had taken. Yet in his heart heknew there was some truth to what she was saying.

Cayla's eyes filled with empathy and in a soothingvoice she said, "Right now you're feeling confused andunsure. You sense there's some truth in what I'm

saying, butbuying into itwould mean thatyou must bethe responsible one—not Rhonda, your client, oryourtemperamental creative team. Somehow that doesn'tfeel fair. You're even feeling alittle scared."

Steve staredat Cayla, wondering how this womancould know all that. It was as though she could read hismind.


"Let me explain," Cayla offered before Stevecouldask. "I can't readyour mind. As a magician, I'm amaster of observation, although right now you're notall that hard to read."

Cayla paused thoughtfully and looked straight intohis eyes. "Steve," she said, "years ago I was in a boatvery similar to the one you're sinking in. Fortunatelyfor me, I met a wonderful guy known as the OneMinute Manager. What he taught me created such amiraculous change in my life that I call it magic. I'dlike to passthat magic on to you."

"Magic?" Steve asked incredulously. "I think Ineed more than smoke and mirrors to deal with this

mess!"

"It isn't in smoke and mirrors," Cayla said flatly."The magic comes from selfleadership."

Steve was quick to reply. "Leadership might workfor the One Minute Manager, but I'm not a manager—let alone a famous one. I'm a lowly account executivewith a manager who doesn't support me—not whenit counts."


Cayla lifted an eyebrow. "That's howit looks fromwhere you're sitting now—which is on the pity pot."She smiled as she said it, and Steve couldn't suppressa chuckle. "You have to turn the problem upsidedown," Cayla continued, "so that you're the one on top.It's time to stop looking for excuses and start leadingyourself."

"Thanks for the pep talk, butI don't believe inpoppsychology ormagic bullets," Steve said glumly.

"I need you to suspend your disbelief, as you didwhen you were achild watching magic and believing.I need you to believe in the magic ofself leadership,"Caylasaid.

Steve half-grinned as he asked, "All right, what'sthe trick?"

"Actually, there are three tricks. I'll share themwith you when you are ready."

"How doI know when I'm ready?""You are ready for self leadership when you take

responsibility foryourown success."Steve thought for a moment before responding.

"You mean I have tostop blaming Rhonda, my creativeteam, andthe client andask myselfwhat I didor didn'tdo to succeed?"


"Yes," she replied. "You need to stop thinking of'empowerment' as a four-letter word and realize thatitis agrand opportunity. You need tostart taking theleadto getwhatyou need."

There was a long pause as Steve pondered Cayla'schallenge. Finally, he said in a soft voice, "I think Iunderstand. Rhonda empowered me to do a job, andI failed to take the initiative and responsibihty forsucceeding in it. I played the role of a victim. Theproblem with being empowered is that when things gowrong, you have no excuses. There's no one to blamebut yourself."

"Here's the truth of it: There's only power inempowerment ifyou are aselfleader." Caylawaited forSteve s eye contact. "Remember:

a

Empowerment Is Something

Someone Gives You.

SelfLeadership

Is What You Do

To Make It Work.

#


"I obviously failed the selfleadership test. But Ican't afford for my resume to reflect thatI was fired—even if I deserve it. I've got my resignation letteralmost finished," Steve declared.

"Whoa!" Cayla held up her hand. "There you goagain with the pity party! What happened to selfleadership?"

"That's what I'mdoing," Steve argued. "I'mtakingthe initiative andquitting!"

Cayla shook her head and laughed. "There aretimes when quitting is appropriate, but this isn't oneofthem. Why are you so convinced that you don't haveachance? No one has actuallywarned you, have they?"

"No, but I know what Rhonda will think," Stevesaiddefiantly.

"Steve, is this statement true or false? Teople arenotmind readers, so it isunfair to expect themto knowwhatyou are thinking.' "

"True, with you being the possible exception,"Steve said with a smile.

Cayla smiled back. "So if Rhonda can't possiblyknow what you are thinking, how are you so sure youknowwhat she is thinking?"

Steve knew she had nailed him. "You have a

point," he said.


"What about this statement? It is in my own bestinterest to take responsibility for getting what I needto succeedin myjob.' "

"I guess the responsibility is mine," Steve agreedhesitantly, "but I'm notsurewhat to do."

"Follow me," Cayla said.

People Are Not Mind Readers

S teve followed Cayla to the back of the store andsaw her slip through a door with a small nameplatebearing her name. When he reached the doorway ofCayla's office, he stood transfixed. Inside was a forestof shelves, boxes, barrels, trunks, and cabinets stuffedwith magic paraphernalia. It was an enchanted place,not because of the things in it, but because of thefeeling he got when he entered the room.

Caylawent over to an old oak fifing cabinet labeled"Magic of Self Leadership." She opened the topdrawer, riffled through files, and pulled out a sheet asshe exclaimed, "Abracadabra!"

Steve laughed despite himself, caught up inCayla's joy at finding asingle piece ofpaper.

People Are Not Mind Readers 119

"Your homework for this afternoon," she said,handing himthe sheet.

Instructions: Rank the following workplacemotivators according to their importance to you.Place the ranking (one throughten) beside themotivator, with one being most importantand tenbeing the least.

Interesting work

Full appreciation of work done

Feelingof being "in" on things

Job security

Good wages

Promotion and growth within theorganization

Good working conditions

Personal loyalty to employees

— Sympathetic helpwith personal problems

Tactful disciplining

201 People Are Not Mind Readers

"Rank the motivators on this sheet in order oftheir importance to you, one through ten—with onebeing the most important and ten being the leastimportant. Then" Cayla emphasized, "you are to ask atleast five ofyour colleagues atwork for their rankings.Bring it all back to me tomorrow and tell me what youlearned."

"Is this a trick?" Steve asked skeptically."It's the beginning of one!" Cayla said

enthusiastically "What you learn from this assignmentwill reinforce what you learned today and lead you tothe first trick ofbeing a selfleader."

"Okay, I'll go along with this for now—but I'mnotsaying Iwon't quit. Ihave until my boss gets back at theend of the month to make up my mind." Saying thewords filled Steve with foreboding. Hehadnever leftajob under negative circumstances. "If you don't mindme asking, what's inthis for you?"

Cayla smiled. "Remember the One MinuteManager guy I told you about? After he got me out ofmy mess, I asked him how I could repay him for all hisinsight and help. He told me that the one thing I coulddo was topass onthelearning toothers.

"Besides," shecontinuedwithawink, "mylife visionis to be a magician. You are giving me an opportunityto do magic." Cayla's warmth and sincerity left Stevefeeling comfortable about moving ahead.


"I guess I could use a little magic right now," headmitted: "I'llseeyou tomorrow."

Steve arrived back attheagency and virtually hid whenone ofhis team members happened by. Heknew he'dhave to face them tomorrow at the scheduled meeting,but he wasn't ready to face his failure just yet.

As inconspicuously as possible, he madephotocopies of the sheet Cayla had given him andconsidered which colleagues to survey. He decided tostart with someone who would cooperate withoutneeding a mountain ofexplanation: Rhonda's assistant,Phyllis.

He dropped the survey in Phyllis's office andfollowed up by sending a voicemail alerting her tocheck her inbox. He then took a couple of minutesto rank his own sheet.

Just before the end ofthe day, Steve journeyed toPhyllis's office topick uphersheet.

"Oh, Steve, I finished your survey. It's veryinteresting. You'll let me know what you learn whenyour study is complete?" As usual, Phyllis greetedSteve with warmth and a professionalism developedover manyyears as an executive assistant. Phyllis couldprobably run the agency, but she seemed very contentwith herrole as behind-the-scenes support.

22I People Are Not Mind Readers

Before Steve could respond, Grant popped hishead in. "What survey?" he asked.

Steve couldn't believe Grant's boldness. Otherpeople seemed to find the up-and-coming junioraccount executive quite charming, but Steve thoughthe was frivolous and shallow. Despite his reservations,Steve handed Grant a photocopied sheet. After all, heneeded four more people tocomplete the survey.

Before Steve knew it, he had handed the surveyout to Mike from the mailroom, Skye from informationservices, and a couple of others he didn't even knowverywell.

When Grant gave his survey back toSteve, hesaidwith a warm smile, "No offense, Steve, but I don't seehow this fist is going to prove anything. I mean, it'spretty obvious that interesting work is what reallymotivates people."

When others heard this, it started a raging debateover the most important motivators. As the noise levelescalated, Ricardo, one of the agency's senior partners,came out of his office to investigate. The MadisonAvenue-dressed exec took a look at the list and said,"Well, it seems obvious to me."

Steve's heart sank, because he assumed thatRicardo would validate Grant's opinion.

"All ofyou have asked for more money inthepast,so I guess that's what motivates you!" Ricardo said.

People Are NotMind Readers 123

The group stood in quiet surprise. None of themhad mentioned good wages in their top three choices.Grant had argued for interesting work; Phyllis feltthat appreciation was more important; Skye had listedgoodworking conditions. Each one of them had theirown rationale for their ranking.

As people shared their answers with Ricardo,Steve observed the exec's discomfort. Ricardo lookedembarrassed for not recognizing what motivated thepeople he employed, and Steve sensed that this madehim suddenly feel inadequate.

Hoping to help alleviate Ricardo s feelings ofself-doubt, Steve said, "That's the point of this exercise!Eachofushas different things thatmotivate us. Grantsenergy demands interesting work. Phyllis probablyfavors the feeling of being appreciated, because somuch ofher work is in support ofothers. In fact, whatmotivates youtoday may change tomorrow."

Steve looked atthemailroom clerk. "Forexample,when Mike's kids get older and he's thinking aboutsending them tocollege, good wages may go tothetopofhis list."

"Okay," Grant allowed, "maybe different thingsmotivate eachofus. Is that the point?"

241 People Are NotMind Readers

Steve thought about his discussions with Cayla.Supposedly this survey would reinforce what he'dlearned earHer and lead to the first trick of selfleadership. Suddenly, the dots connected in Steve'smind.

"The point is, ourbosses are notmind readers!" heexclaimed. "How in the world can we expect them tounderstand what motivates each of us? It's not fair to

them—or to us."

Feeling true excitement about his insight, Stevelooked at each of his colleagues one by one, thendeclared:

Ultimately, It's In

Your Own Best

Interest To Accept

Responsibility

ForGetting What

You Need

To Succeed In

The Workplace.

261 People Are NotMind Readers

Ricardo looked relieved—and impressed. "Whenwegeta chance, let's talk more about this, Steve. Rightnow, I've got an earlydinner meeting to get to. But itseems that there's something we could all learn fromyourlittlesurvey."

Grant patted Steve on the back as he turned toleave. "Good show!"

The others took their cues and went their own

ways. Phyllis stared intently at Steve as he stoodmotionless in her doorway.

"Are you okay?" sheasked. "You look confused."Steve was slow to answer. "I am confused. I think

the point of the survey is to demonstrate that a bosscan'tpossibly know everything we need, sowe shouldtake responsibility forourselves."

"Okay, that's a great lesson. So, where's theconfusion?"

"I don't know. I think there's something else Ineed to learn, but I'm not sure what it is," Stevereplied,deep in thought.

"You're a smartguy. I bet youfigure it out,"Phyllissaid optimistically. "Let me know when you do." Withthat she went backto workat her computer.


Stevewasnot onlyconfused, but ill at ease aswell.He felt he was leaving something unsettled. He wasthe type who hated an unfinished crossword puzzle.He spotted typos better than most copy editors andhe actually liked having rules and clearly definedsteps to follow. Buthere he was, up in the air about somany things. He was scared ofbeing fired but unsureabout resigning; troubled bythis strange magic womannamed Cayla but curious why she felt more like aguardian angel than a stranger. He was also eager tobe a selfleader but conflicted about the responsibihtyit demanded.

He thought about Cayla's words: I need you tobelieve in the magic ofselfleadership. Did he believein magic? It would be a restless night forSteve.

Elephant Thinking

lbhe next morning Steve pulled up to Caylas Cafeandparked in a spotjustoutside the storefront. Alittlechime rangas he enteredthe door—a melodious signalto the clerks that someone might need their help. Ashe ordered his mocha, he heard someone whistlingacross the room. It was Cayla, whomotionedforhim tojoinher.

Steve grabbedhis mug and moved toward Cayla.She disappeared behind a bookcase, but he followedthe whistling and found her digging through a deskinher little office.

Elephant Thinking 129

He was struck by how petite she was—he hadn'tremembered her being so small. When she finallyspoke, he realized why. Her voice was deep, rich, andfull. It was hard to imagine that such a small personcould have that much resonance in her voice.

"So," she beganwithout looking up, "howdid theassignmentgo?"She continued to search the drawer.

"I did the survey, and I think it underscored whatyou said yesterday about people not being mindreaders. I'm not sure where it's leading, but it taughtme something."

"Like what?" Cayla asked as she pulled a pairof scissors from a tangle of rubber bands and paperclips.

"It wasn't so much the survey, but the discussion itgenerated," Steve clarified. "It became obvious thatno boss can know and provide the motivation thatevery individual needs. Each of us has a differentmotivation for doing what we do, so it is up to us totake responsibility for creating a work environmentthat ismotivating to us," Steve concluded confidently.

"Well done," Cayla said with a smile. "You haveproved ready to take on the responsibility of selfleadership. It's time to learn the first trick of a selfleader." Cayla pickedup her scissors and led Steve to atable nestled among the bookshelves. "What otherinsights didyouhave aboutbeinga selfleader?"

301 "Elephant Thinking

"I don't know if this will make sense, because Iusually need time to process things," Steve said.

"Goahead," Cayla encouraged."It has to do with mywhole way of thinking about

the workplace—things I have believed since I startedworking, even as a kid. Up until yesterday, I thoughtmyboss should know what I need and give it to me—but that's not how it works. I wonder what else I have

wrong.""Do youhave a business card?" Cayla asked."Sure," Steve said, puzzledbyher out-of-the-blue

request. He pulled a card from his briefcase andhanded it to her. "I apologize. I shouldhave given oneto youyesterday."

"It's not for me—its for you. It's a challenge."Cayla held the standard-size business card in bothhands, turningit overseveral times asthoughcheckingto be sure there was nothingabnormalabout it.

She slid the scissors in Steve's direction and

ceremoniously laid the business card down on thetable. "Take these scissors and cut a hole from the card

large enough to go around your head. By the way, ahole is a space surrounded by continuous paper—nogaps or breaks, or joining ends."

Steve looked at her as though she were crazy.Cayla sat silently, waiting.


"I know you said you were going to teach mesome magic, but I don't have time for games, Cayla.Myjob is in jeopardy."

Undaunted, Cayla replied, "I know you thinkyoudon'thave timeforthis. You can'timagine howit couldbe useful or relevant and besides, it's just a trick,right?"

"Now that you mention it, I hate parlor tricks—I've never been any good at them. I've lost moremoney in bars thanyou can imagine. Some people justhave a knackfor this kind of thing—I don't."

Cayla nodded. "Elephantthinking.""Excuse me?"

"You've limited yourself based on your pastexperiences," she said, shaking her head in sympathy."When they begin to train an elephant for the circus,they chain the baby elephant's leg to a pole in theground. The baby elephant wants to get away. Hepulls andtugs, buthecan't escape—the chain istoo bigand the pole is too deep in the ground. So he stopstrying. As he grows up, he just assumes he can't getaway.

"Today he's a six-ton elephant. He could sneezeandpullout that chain—but he doesn't eventry. Circustrainers say they can put a piece of string around thatsix-ton elephant's legandhe won't breakaway."

32I Elephant Thinking

"So you're saying I'm like that elephant?" Stevefrowned. "That because I've failed in the past I don'teven try anymore?" Hearing the words out loud, herealized theimpact ofwhat hew;as saying.

Cayla smiled. "You have just tapped into the firsttrick of a self leader."

Steve perkedup. "Really?""Yes. It's those kinds ofassumptions thatlimit you

every day. They'recalled assumed constraints.""What's a consumed restraint?" Steve asked.

She laughed at his mangled terminology, thenclarified:

An Assumed Constraint

IsA BeliefYou Have,

Based On Past Experience,

That Limits Your

Current And Future

Experiences.

34 I Elephant Thinking

"Okay, I understand that I have assumedconstraints about this scissors and card trick, but what'sthat gotto dowith my work situation?" Steve asked.

"You are assuming that you know what Rhonda,your team, and your client think and feel. You areassuming that you can't be successful in your role atwork. You need to knock it off," Cayla said none toogently.

"This isdepressing," Steve said."It could be inspirational," Cayla countered."Too bad I don'thave your powers ofobservation.

Then I'd know what everybody is thinking and Iwouldn'tjump to assumed constraints so often," Stevesaid.

"Being able to read people is a gift—but thegreatergift is to know yourown mind."

Steve winced. "Yeah. That's a definite challenge."Cayla nodded. After a pause she said, "I have to

go, but while we're on the subject of challenges, areyou ready tocutahole from your card big enough togoaround your head?"

Steve took the scissors andpicked up the card. Tohis astonishment, his business information was nolongeron the card. Insteadwere the words:


The First Trick of a Self Leader:

Challenge

Assumed

Constraints!

He glancedup to commendCayla on her sleightofhand, but she was gone. With an amused smile, heshook his head. Looking at his watch, he realized heshouldbe going, too. In less than an hour he was due atthe office for his dreaded team meeting.

Steve arrivedat the agency just in time to do somelast-minute preparation. He'd been procrastinating, notsure how to tell the team members that their efforts

had been rejected by the client. He knew they wouldlookto him for answers, and he didn't haveany.

361 Elephant Thinking

The team—the creative guys, productioncoordinator, and media buyer—filed into theconference room to hear what United Bank had

thought of the presentation. Theymusthave senseditwasn't good news. Without much chatter they tooktheir places andwaited forSteve to beginthe meeting.

Steve began slowly. "United Bank acknowledgedand appreciated the hard work that went into thecampaign."

Peter, the Art Director, interrupted. "You don'thave to butter usup, Steve. Theymustnothave boughtit or youwould have said something beforenow. Whatdid they say?"

Prompted by Peter's directness, Steve blurted,"They said it was garbage." Even Peter had nocomeback.

Steve spoke into the silence. "I thinkwe allwouldagree that it wasn't our best work. I don't have anyanswers rightnow, but I dohave an apology."

He saw them sit up a little straighter as hecontinued. "Mypresentation was fine, and the effortyougave was fine. Whatdidn'twork was the lack of anagreed-upon budget and overall strategy. You can'tcreate something in a vacuum—and for that, I takeresponsibility."

"Well, theyaren't the easiest peopleto workwith,"Maril, the mediabuyer, offered.


Alexa, half the Peter and Alexa creative team,pretended to pull her hair out, saying, "They'rebankers! What do they know about creative work?Theyprobablywouldn'tknow goodcreativeworkfroma hole in the ground!"

Stevewasfloored by the team's comments.All thistime he had assumed their disdain was for him, when

actually it was the client they had issues with. He wasrelieved until he realized that their perceptions camefromthe negative energyhe'd shown towardthe client.If they were down on the client, that was hisresponsibility. His assumedconstraints had limited thewhole team. Howcouldhe open their minds?

Suddenly, he had an idea.He rummaged through his briefcase and found

the scissors he'd taken from Cayla. He passed out abusiness card to each team member and said, "What ifI asked you to cut a hole from my business card largeenough to stickmyhead through?"

They stared at him."A hole is a space surrounded by continuous

paper,"he elaborated. "Thepaper mustbe one piece—no cutting it in two and joiningends around myhead."

After giving his words a fewseconds to sink in, hechallenged them. "What are you thinking right now?What's going through your head about what I've justasked you to do? Jude? Maril? Alexa? Peter?"


Peter spoke first. "My first thought is, 'What's thisgot to do with anything?' "

Jude, the production coordinator, stated withconviction, "I don't think it can be done."

Maril shook her head. "It can probably be doneor you wouldn't be asking, but I certainly don't havethe time to waste trying to figure it out rightnow."

Alexa jumped up, grabbedthe scissors and a card,and started cutting concentric circles that fell out in aspiral. She seemed confident of her solution until sherealized that she would have to cut the paper spiral tounravel it, and that would break the rules. In defeatshe uttered, "I hate these puzzles, I can never figurethem out."

Peter observed each person's response until thegroup all looked to him. Quietly he stood, took acard, and folded it in half lengthwise. He cut a seriesof narrow slits from the folded edge to within ahairsbreadthof the opposite side.

Next he turned the card completely around sothat the open edges were facing him. Going theopposite direction, he cut more slits between theother slits, again stopping within a hairsbreadth ofthe oppositeend of the card.


Finally, he slipped the scissors into the fold andcut carefully. The group watched in awe as Peterunfolded the card. He pulled the slits apart as wideas they would go, revealing a fragile paper ring.Carefully, he slipped the ring over Steve's head andaround his neck.*

The team broke out in applause. Peter lookedhumbled—the first time Steve had witnessed thatemotion in him.

"I'm an art director," Peterexplained, "anda loveroforigami—the ancient Japanese artofpaper folding.I've done stuff like this since I was a kid."

Maril looked at Steve. "This has been veryentertaining andall, butwhat's the point?"

Steve sat down, clasped his hands in front of himonthe table, and said, "Elephant thinking."

"Okay, I'll bite," Peter said.Steve told them the elephant story that Cayla had

told him. "Four of us had elephant thinking whenchallenged to cut the card. It can't be done, I don'thave time, I'm not good at these kinds ofthings.' Ourassumed constraints limited our belief that the trick

could be done. But it turns out that one of us did havean answer."

1Forinstructions onhow toperform thistrick, seetheAppendix.


" 'Assumed constraint,' " saidAlexa, repeating thephrase. "What's that?"

"It's a belief based on past experience that limitsyour current or future experience," Steve said. "I nowrealize that I gave up onthe creative process because Iassumed you and Peter should have all the answers. Igave up on Rhonda because I assumed she had givenup on me. And I gave up on United Bank because Iassumed they were nuts!" There. He'd spoken thetruth.

Alexa let out a chuckle. "I'm not sure it's an

assumed constraint to think the client is nuts. Maybethey are."

Steve felt uncomfortable when the team laughedat the client's expense. Not wanting to come off tooheavy, he let them enjoy the moment before he said,"I'm not sure I've been fair to United Bank. I'd like

to suggest that we all give them the benefit of thedoubt. They've suffered because I haven't handled thesituation well. If we lose them, the entire agency willsuffer."

Jude looked at him with concern. "Do you reallythink we'll lose the account?" she asked.

"I don't know. When I tell Rhonda about their

reaction to the presentation, my bet iswe'll eitherloseme or the client."


"I've heard rumors that, uh, Grant was going totake over the account," Maril said haltingly. "How doyou feel about that?"

Too stunned to answer, Steve sat for what felt likean eternity. He hadn't heard any rumors. He loathedtheidea thatpeople were talking about replacing him.

"How doyou think I'd feel?" he finally mustered.Maril spoke slowly, choosing her words carefully.

"You've been so discouraged, disgusted, andfrustrated—I thought maybe you'd be relieved."

Steve felt completely exposed. He wastransparent—not just to Cayla, but to his coworkersaswell. How did he feel? He tended to be a thinker, nota feeler. Cayla's words flashed inhis memory:

The real gift is to know your own mind."I can see why you think I'd be relieved," Steve

heard himselfreply, "but I don't want togive up. I wantto meet the challenge. I'm not sure where to start,except to ask for your forgiveness as I try to stop theship from sinking."

"Steve," said Peter, "you know I don't care muchfor account executives—the best way to kill a creativeideais to runit pastone ofyou guys."

Steve laughed, though he knew Peter was onlyhalf-kidding.

42 I Elephant Thinking

"But for the creative process to work," Petercontinued, "artists need guidance and direction. Thatneeds to come from you."

"Peter is right," Alexa said. "And the placeto startiswith the client. You've gotto steer them in the rightdirection—even if theyare difficult."

"You're right, ofcourse," Steve said. "That's whereI'll start. I'll get the budget issue ironed out and letyouknow whatwedecide."

"In the meantime, I have an idea," offeredMaril. "We should collect the recent campaigns ofcompetitors and advertisers who are similar to ourclient. Let's get smart about what everyone else isdoing—even though we don't know what we'redoingyet."

The last fifteen minutes of the meetingwere filledwithenthusiastic energy as theymappedout a plan. Asthey leftthe meeting room, each team memberwishedSteve luck. He would need it. What could he possiblysay to the client to turn this thing around? He hadchallenged his assumed constraints with his team,but nowwhat? He felt powerless.

Cycles ofPower

teve was up early the next morning, even thoughit was a Saturday. The pressure he feltwouldn't let himsleep. Heknew heneeded an escape, even iffor only afew hours. With dawn breaking, he went tothe garageand pulled the cover off the majestic motorcycle thatwas his pride and joy. He rolled the gleaming Harleyout to the street, strapped on his helmet, and threwhis leg over the saddle. He started the motor andreveled in the powerful sound. He would spend thisday as a wheeled warrior.

44 I Cycles of Power

He shifted into gear and headedoff. Thunderingalong the road, he realized there were so many thingshe loved about motorcycling—the proverbial wind inhis face was only a small partofit. As he contemplatedthe joys ofriding, he felt a sense ofmastery over whathe realized was actually a prettyinept machine. Afterall, a motorcycle couldn't even stand upbyitself. Steveloved the synergy of riding—the melding of man orwoman and machine that gave capabilities and powerto both that neitherpossessed separately.

The magic of the moment was interrupted whenthe bike started sputtering and slowing down. Hepulled over totake alook. Hehad been off thebike forno more than a few minutes when he heard another

cycle pull up. There's an unwritten code among bikers,so Steve knew it must be another biker stopping tosee ifhe could be of service.

"Needany help?" Thevoice sounded familiar. Helooked upfrom the wiring he'd been fiddling with andhisjawdropped open.

"Cayla?" he said, flabbergasted.Cayla looked as surprised as Steve as she shook

her head. "Wow, isn't this a coincidence?""Somehow I don't think so," Steve said."You know, when I met you at the cafe I thought

you looked familiar, and now I think I know why. Areyou a H.O.G.?" Cayla asked.

Cycles of Power 145

"Yeah, I am. But I haven't been to a HarleyOwner Group meeting for months," Stevesaid.

"So how'd it go with your team yesterday?"Steve gave her a noncommittal shrug."I'm guessing," Cayla continued, "but tell me

if I'm wrong: Yesterday you took responsibility,challenged assumed constraints, and decided to fightfor your job and the client. The problem is, you don'tknow where to begin. You feel powerless."

"There you go again, reading my mind!" Steveshook his head, not knowing what to beheve. "Butyou're right. That's why I took timeout fora ride."

Cayla looked at Steve's cycle. 'What happened?"she asked.

"She died on me," he said. He tested the ignitionbut nothing happened. "Iknow I've got plenty ofgas,so it's probably a bad battery or a fouled spark plug."He rummaged through his saddlebag, searching for aspare set ofplugs.

"Letme help," Cayla said as she pulled a spare setfrom underneath her seat.

"Are you sure these aren't trick plugs?" Steveasked, only half-kidding.

Cayla seemed not to hear his comment. "It's ashame that help like this isn't more common in thereal world, isn't it?"

461 Cycles of Power

Steve wasn't sure ifCayla was speaking ofthe realworld outside ofcycling enthusiasts, or the real worldoutside thestrange one created every time he mether.

Cayla continued, "Listen, there's adealer close by.Why don't you follow me over there, so you can replacethe plugs I loaned you?"

"I didn't know there was a shop around here,"Steve said.

"Yeah, Hal's Harleys—I've been going there foryears."

"Hal's?" Steve recognized the name. "Hal's islegendary. I didn't know it was around here. Soundslike a good planto me."

They fired up their engines and Cayla took thelead. Soon Steve was again immersed in the pure joyofriding, wondering why it gave him such a thrill. Hewas so engrossed in his own thoughts that he almostmissed Cayla's signal as she took a left off the road.A few yards farther down they turned left again intothe Harley-Davidson dealership. Before Steve coulddismount, Cayla was standing beside him, helmet andglasses already off.

"Power." Cayla spoke the word in a resonant voicethat evoked its meaning.

Steve was confused. "Excuse me?""Power," Cayla repeated. "It's why you love to

ride."

Cycles of Power 147

Steve started to freak. "How did you know I wasthinkingabout—"

"I'm a keen observer, remember? I've seen thatlook before—I've had that look before—where youare lost in the joy ofriding and you're not quite surewhy. Well, I know why. It's the power, the knife-edgedcontrol, and the independence that riding offers."

"I'mnotsureI agree it's about power andcontrol,"Steve countered. "Riding is fun—pure and simple."

"When did you start riding?" Cayla asked.Steve enjoyed reliving the story of his love affair

with motorcycles. He told her about riding on theback ofhis dad's motorcycle, hardly able towait untilhe was old enough to ride for himself. When he wasthirteen, he'd talked his dad into buying him a smallscooter. At sixteen, he'd made his first road trip, ridingfrom Denver to the Nebraska state line with hisyounger brother.

"I loved thefeeling ofindependence and freedomfrom all the rules and regulations I lived with inschool," he said. "But Iwasn't on apower trip."

"Maybe you should reconsider the way you definepower," Cayla suggested gently.

Words began to flow through Steve's head: abuse,corruption, coercion, control, authority, manipulation,money, domination.

481 Cycles of Power

Cayla studied him closely. "Interesting," she said."Iimagine that most ofthe words you're thinking aboutare negative, because you've seen power misused somuch."

Steve opened his mouth to comment, but Caylathrew out another question.

"Have you ever known someone who was in apowerful position, but you had no respect for them?"she asked.

Silly question, thought Steve, ofcourse I have. Inaddition to a couple of executive types at work, hecould add a number of pohticians—as well as Rogerfrom United Bank.

Cayla nodded as though agreeing with hisunspoken thoughts. "Lord Acton wrote, Tower tendsto corrupt, and absolute power corrupts absolutely.'Steve, think about all the negative stereotypes wehaveabout power today—its a wonder anyone would everwant to be powerful."

"I guess you're right," Steve admitted. "But I'mnotsure where you're going with this discussion."

"I think you are trying to avoid power and I'mtrying tohelp you understand why."

"Wait a minute," Steve said, feeling more than ahttle defensive. "I've got aproblem justbecause I don'tthink power is everything it's cracked up tobe?"

Cycles of Power 149

"Stay with me here," Cayla encouraged. "We werediscussing the concept ofpower. I'm suggesting it isthe sense of power that you love about riding. Thepower of being one with the bike; the power thatbrings you a sense ofcontrol. When you ride, you feelfree. Compare this feeling to the way you feel aboutyour work right now."

Steve groaned. He was trying not to think aboutwork for a couple of hours. And he sure didn'twant tocompare ridingto work.

"Do you feel powerful atwork?" Cayla challenged.Being an account executive in charge of United

Bank should have made him feel empowered and freeto do great work. Instead he felt restricted—stifled byothers' expectations of him, burdened by his lack ofexperience with creative types, confused bya difficultchent, and threatened by people such as Rhondawho were in positions that allowed them to determinehis fate. Right now he certainly didn't have the feelingofbeing onewith his job.

"In fact, I feel powerless," he confessed."Why do you think you feel that way?" Cayla

asked.

"Because I'm notin a position to getpeople to dowhat Iwant them to do," Steve replied emphatically.

"Are you sure?" Cayla strapped her helmet on theback ofher bike and said:

a

Don'tBuy Into

The Assumed Constraint

That Position Power

Is The Only Power

That Works.

#

Cycles ofPower 151

As she ledhim into theshop, Cayla said, "Iwant tointroduce you tosome people I think you'll appreciate.They all have discovered that there are alot ofways toinfluence others and achieve their goals. We'll startwith Woody—one of the best parts managers in thecountry. Knows most of the part numbers by heart.It's amazing. Just watch."

Theywalked up to the parts counter and Caylawasgreeted warmly by agracious young man.

"Hey, Cayla! What can we do for you? Theworldtreating you okay?" He extended a hand and smiledbrightly.

Cayla gave him a hearty handshake. "Yeah! Or atleast it will be if you'll get my friend here a set ofstandard spark plugs. And can you ask one ofthe boysto check his electrical system? The beast died a fewmiles from here, and I had to rescue him." Cayla gaveSteve a "justteasing" jab in the arm.

Theyoung man winked at Steve. "Bike's not dead,right? Just resting." He smiled back at Cayla, cuppedhis hands together, and yelled, "Joey, pull me a set of32310-78As."

Steve did a double take. The young man hadn'teven looked up thepartnumber.

52 / Cycles of Power

Cayla smiled mischievously and turned back totheparts counter. "By the way, Woody, I'dlike to introduceyou to Steve. Steve, meet Woody, Parts ManagerExtraordinaire."

Woody pulled out an order form. "Glad to helpyou with the parts, but first let me give you my standardsong and dance." At that, Woody stood at attention,cleared his throat, and in a rich baritone recited:

"I stand behind the counter

In a motorcycle store,Sometimes I'm calleda genius,Sometimes I'm called much more.

Some questions are important;Some questions aren't, butoh, my Lord,I'm supposed tobe anEdisonCombinedwithHenryFord.I claim I'm no mechanic

Butwhenthe job goes sick,The mechanic comes and asks me

What makes the darn thingtick.But lifewouldbe a pleasureAndI'd grinfrom ear to earIf the customer'donly tell meThe model, make, and year."

Cycles ofPower 153

Steve laughed and prompdy gave Woody therequisite model, make, andyear.

As hecompleted theorder form, Woody called outto the parts manbehindhim,"I'llalso need a 32591-80and aset of31986-65Cs. Thanks, Joey."

Steve was impressed. "That's quite a skill you havethere. How did you memorize all those part numbers?"

"Oh, there's a method to the madness. Once youunderstand the underlying principles behind thenumbering system, it's not that hard."

Woody pointed at Cayla. "Actually, she's the onewho helped me realize that knowing the system andpart numbers is an important point of power. It'sreally helped me build credibility in this industry. I'vehad a terrific career, and I don't even have a tattoo!"

Cayla cast a sideways glance at Woody and helaughed. "Okay, I do have one small tattoo. Can't getanything past her!"

"What do you mean, 'point of power?" Steveasked.

"A lot of people think there's only one land ofpower—position power—and if you don't have it,you're apuppet ofthose who do," Woody explained.

"I've heard that before," Steve said as he winkedat Cayla. "That land of thinking is very limiting,isn't it?"


"It sure is! The best way to explain that is todemonstrate how we use points of power aroundhere," Woody said. "Come on." He waved for them tocome along as he ledthem to theservice area.

Steve was enthralled by the hubbub of activity:mechanics joking, complaining, carrying on; cyclesbeing rolled and towed and lifted; roaring enginesbeing tested; customers questioning, concerned andnervousabout the prognosis.

Woody explained, "When people bring their bikesin here, it's not as though they're bringing theirmotorcycles to a service department. It's more likethey're bringing a child to the emergency ward.Our wrenches—mechanics, as lay people call 'em—obviously have knowledge power. They are expertsat fixing Harleys. But they've also got personalpower—their ability to give assurance to people andmake them feel comfortable with the work that needsto be done and the costs involved. Cayla helpedeveryone understand that their personal power helpsbalance their knowledge power. That combinationhas made usincredibly successful."

With that comment, one of the sweaty and soiledmechanics called over from his workbench:

Cycles of Power 155

"Before Cayla worked with us, no one thoughtmechanics had much personality, let alone personalpower! But lookat us," the mechanic saidwith a smile."We're actually quite charming."

Everyone laughed, and Steve was just about tocomment on their easy camaraderie when Cayla said,"These guys have great working relationships, don'tthey? Let's go meet Jim, head of sales. He has someinteresting ideas aboutrelationship power/9

They found Jim in the showroom. As soon asJim saw them, hewalked over andgave Cayla a hug.

"Checking up on us, huh? Let me show yousomething!" Jim pulled a rumpled piece of paperout of his shirt pocket and proudly pointed to a listof numbers. "Look at these results from our latestcustomersales and service report."

Cayla took the report from Jim and held it sothat Steve could read along. "This is an incredibleimprovement over last time," Cayla noted. "Whatchanged?"

Jim winked at Steve. "Cayla knows the answer,but I guess she wants you to hear it from me." Heput his arm around Caylas shoulders and gave a littlesqueeze. "AmI right?"

Cayla shrugged innocently.


"It's a little embarrassing," Jim began. "I've beenin sales all my life, so I knew that relationships werevital. But somehow I got caught up in productinformation—I mean, it's easy to do when you lovethe product you're selling. With Caylas help, I finallybegan to reahze that I am good in sales because ofmy personal power—my people skills. People are mypassion and I've built an incredible network. WhenI started to focus on those relationships, my salesand customer satisfaction increased. Sure, we selland service Harley-Davidsons, but we're really in thepeoplebusiness."

"What exactiy do you mean, 'focus onrelationships'?" Steve asked.

"I began to reahze that I had relationship powerthrough my wonderful contacts—customers who werealready happy with me and the dealership. I startedcultivating those relationships and simply asking forleads. One relationship led to another. Now myproblem is that I have all these great relationships andpeople who want to buy, and I have no motorcyclesleft! We've already sold outourannual allocation!"

"That's a nice problem to have," said Steve. "Letme ask you more about this relationship power. It'sobvious how it works in sales, but how does it work inother parts of the shop?"

Cycles of Power 157

Jim discreetly pointed to a young woman workingin the merchandise section of the showroom. "See

the young woman by the leather jackets? That's Lisa,our apparel and accessories buyer. She's the daughterof the owner of the dealership. That's relationshippower."

Steve frowned. "I'm not sure most people findnepotism a positive use ofpower."

"Ah," Jim said thoughtfully. "That's where mostof us go wrong. We don't acknowledge our powerbecause we're afraid of what others might think. Buthaving power doesn't mean you have to use it. Itcertainly doesn'tmeanyou have to abuse it.

"I can tell by the look on your face that you stilldon't agree," Jim continued. "When we first starteddiscussing the issue of power here at the shop, Caylaasked each of us to write down what we thought ourpoints of power were. Lisa didn't have 'Dad' down onher list. We all toldher she should. She protested. Shesaid she wanted to succeed on her own merit, notjust because she's the owner's daughter. She was verysensitive about it.


"You knowwhat I told her? Tool! If my dad werethe owner of the shop, I'd take advantage of it. Youcan talk to him and get information that the rest of uscan't. If you useyour relationship power to do a betterjob and help the shop, then that's using yourpowerina positive way and we'll all be grateful, not jealous orresentful.'"

"Lisa got the job because it's her dad's business,"Cayla added, "but she keeps it because of herknowledge and personal power."

Steve nodded. It was something he'd haveto thinkabout.

"You don't have to agree with everything, Steve,just take it intoaccount," urged Cayla.

"Speaking ofaccounts," Woody said as he grabbedSteve's arm again and led him down the hall. "Let meintroduce you to Dee Dee, our bookkeeper—one ofthe mostpowerful people in the shop."

As they approached the bookkeeper's desk, Stevetookthe lead."Niceto meet you, Dee Dee, and inwhatway are youpowerful?"

Dee Dee either didn't notice or chose to ignorethe hint of mockery in Steve svoice as she repliedwithconfidence, "I used to think I was low person on thetotem pole around here. I mean, my job is the onlyone that doesn't deal directly with motorcycles. ThenCayla helped me realize mytask power/9

Cycles ofPower 159

Jim jumped in. "Funny, I always knew Dee Deereally runs thisjoint. I mean, she's the onewhocuts thepaychecks every week, withholds taxes, pays expenses,invoices our customers, and handles complaints. Butshedidn'tseeherself as having any power!"

"I guess I always thought of power beingheld bysomeone like our owner—someone who has positionpower."

"So did I," said Steve with a smile, "but now Iunderstand that therearemany forms ofpower."

"Acknowledging the power you have gives you asense ofcontrol over your joband your choices. I reallyenjoy my work much more now, even though I don'thave position power," DeeDeesaid with certainty.

"Are you implying there's no need for positionpower?" asked Steve.

"I hope not!"At the soundof the voice, they all turned around.

Standing behind them was a middle-aged, well-builtman with a ponytail down hisback. The man extendedhis hand to Steve.

601 Cycles of Power

"Nice to meet you. I'm Hal, the owner of thisshop, and I'm here to tell you that position power is agoodthingto have. ButI'velearneda great lesson: Thebest leadership situation is where you have positionpower and never have to use it! Like money in thebank, even though you maynever need it, it's nice toknow it's there. Besides, it's better to have peopleworkwithyou—not foryou."

Hal pointed to a plaque on the counter. "This isour leadershipcredo,"he said.

The only way in whichanyone can lead you is

to restore to you the beliefin your own guidance.

—Henry Miller

"That credo mustwork," Stevesaid. "Hal'sHarleysis legendary and now I know why—you have all kindsof self leaders around here."

"They sure do," said Cayla, "and one of theways they have become effective self leaders is byunderstanding the five kinds ofpower." With that, shepointedto a posteron the wall:

Cycles ofPower 161

Position Power

Knowledge Power

Relationship PowerPersonal Power

Points of Power

Task Power

"As you can see," Cayla continued, "the firstpointofpowerisknowledge power: as Woody has; second ispersonal power, as the service reps have; third isrelationship power, asJim and Lisahave; fourth is taskpower, as Dee Dee has; and fifth is position power, asHal has."

62 I Cycles of Power

Steve furrowed his brow in thought. "I think Iget it now," he said. "You need to know the natureof your strengths—your power—before you can leadyourself."

"That's right!" Cayla said. "How can you leadyourself if you don't reahze that you have sources ofpower? Everyone has different types of power in theirlives andwork." Cayla pauseda moment to let that sinkin. "Each point of power can contribute to yoursuccess—or become the weak link," she continued."When I found you on the side of the road, it was asimple little spark plug that had disabled a powerful,complex machine.

"The message is: Identify and recognize yourpointsof power and cultivate them. But it is importantto remember what Balthazar Gracian said, The soleadvantage ofpower is ability to do more good.' "

"That's the first time I've ever heard powerdiscussed asa toolfor doing good," Steve confessed.

Cayla nodded knowingly. After another pauseshe asked, "How can you do more good for yourself,your family, your team, your organization, or yourcommunityifyoudon't havepower?"

"I see your point," said Steve.

Cycles of Power 163

As they headed to the exit, Steve realized he'dbeen to dozens of motorcycle shops, but had neverenjoyed hanging around one as much as he had thisday. It wasn't just the hardware, noise, activity, andsmells he loved. He realized it was the people he reallyenjoyed. These were enthusiasts, folks who loved whattheydidevery day. They were people who had a senseof their unique pointsofpower.

As he passed theparts counter, Steve waved goodbye to Woody.

"Don't forget your parts!" Woody said, pointing toa brownpaper bagsitting on the counter.

"Oh yeah, thanks. And speaking of thanks,where'd Cayla go?" Steve asked as he looked aroundthe showroom.

Woody glanced around and shrugged hisshoulders. "Don't know," he said as he put the receiptin Steve's bag. "Hey, it was great to meet you! Ridesafe!"

Outside the shop, Caylas motorcycle was gone.Steve reached into his bag for the replacement partsand pulled out what he thought was the receipt. Butinstead it was a paper slip witha printed message:

641 Cycles ofPower

The Second Trick of Self Leadership:

Celebrate Your

Points of PowerSll!^^

Steve shook his head in wonder. Was there no end

to Cayla's tricks?He fired up hisbigV-twin and notched it into first

gear. As he roared away, he could hear Cayla's voice inhis mind:

Perhaps your greatest weakness is not realizingyour own power

He would think about that later, when he figuredoutwhatto do abouthisjob.For the momenthe didn'twantto think—he justwantedto ride. No, he needed toride. It made himfeel powerful.

5

Diagnose Yourself

B,'right and early Monday morning, Steve headedfor Cayla's Cafe, determined to save his job and keephis client. If Cayla couldn't help him, maybe thecaffeine would. He'd spent Sunday poring over hisfiles, notes, andproposals, looking for the flaw that hadcaused the chent to reject the plan. In the process herealized that the only point of power he had withUnited Bank was task power. To restore the client'sconfidence, he would need knowledge power—and forthat, he needed help.

661 Diagnose Yourself

Steve entered the cafe, keeping an eye out forCayla. He made his way tothe coffee counter, and justas hewas about to ask thebarista ifCayla was in, Steveheard the whistling. He turned around and sureenough, she was sitting at "their" table, as thoughwaiting for him. Steve smiled and went over tojoin her.

"Where didyou disappear to on Saturday?" Steveasked. "I still had questions."

"I thought you needed to be alone to process allyou learned at Hal's," Cayla explained. 'Where is yourthinking now?"

"I've analyzed everything to death. I just can'tfigure outwhat's wrong with thebudget and strategy Ialready proposed," Steve said with a sigh.

"Have you ever worked with a chentto develop acomprehensive ad campaign before?" Cayla asked,though it was clear that she knewthe answer.

"No, but I've drawn updozens ofbudgets over theyears, and the budget is the centerpiece of thestrategy,"Steve said in his own defense.

Cayla pulled out two rubber bands. "Steve, I'mgoing to use a magic trick as a metaphor for yoursituation. Will you play along with me?"

Steve shrugged his shoulders. "Iguess so. Ifyou'regoing to teach me that cool trick you showedthe kidsthe other day, then yeah."

Diagnose Yourself/ 67

"I once met an old Indian mystic—" she began.Caylathe mentor transformed before Steve's eyes intoCayla the magician. She wove her story as she hadbefore. Pickingup the rubber bands, she demonstratedwhat appeared to be magic. She separated the tangledbands from each other as though moving matterthrough matter.

Knowing what was coming, Steve tried to detectthe trick. But Cayla's performance was flawless. Hefound himselfas delightedas the children had been—not because it was magic, but because he appreciatedthe skill behind her performance.

"Amazing!" he said.Cayla reveled in his praise for a moment before

switching back to her mentor persona. "Your goal,Steve, is to amazesomeonewiththis magic trick by thistime next week."

Steve laughed. He would enjoy sharing the trickwith his girlfriend, Blair. He still hadn't told her whatwasgoingon at work. He knewBlairsensed somethingwas wrong, but over the years she had learned to givehim his space until he was readyto talk. It would be funto lighten thingsup forher. "Okay, where do I start?"


"By asking yourself two questions about thegoal of performing the magic trick: First, what is yourlevel of competence? Second, what is your level ofcommitment? Let's startwith the first question—yourcompetence."

"I'mdefinitely competent!" Steve said confidently."I watched youvery carefully and saw exactly whatyoudid, so I'm sure I can do it."

"So, if you are competent, take these and do thetrick." Cayla handed himthe rubber bands.

Steve tookthe two bands and entangledthem theway he remembered Cayla doing it. He flexed andstretchedthe bands, attempting to separate them. Thebands shot off his fingers and flew across the shop.Embarrassed, he stood to fetch them, but Cayla heldher arm out and stoppedhim.

"I thought this might happen," she said with asmile as she pulled a large bagof rubber bands out ofher case.

"What did I do wrong?" Steve asked."You acted as though you had competence when,

in fact, youdidn't," Cayla replied."That's harsh," Steve accused.

Diagnose Yourself / 69

"No, its simply the truth, and you needn't beashamed. Competence means youhavethe knowledgeand skill to accomplish the goal or do the skill inquestion. If you've never done the trick before, thenyou can't possibly have knowledge or skill. You are atthe learning stage. What's wrong with that? You can'texpect to be competent on a trick you've never doneand have no idea how to do."

Steve nodded that he understood. "Okay, showme how."

Cayla took two rubber bands and placed themstrategically on the thumb and index finger of eachhand. She performed the trickslowly and deliberately

Steve shookhis head in admiration. "I think I getit now, but I suppose I'll have to practice beforeI'm actually competent. By the way, you said I wassupposed to ask myself two questions about the goal.The first question was about mylevel of competence,but I forget the secondone.Whatwas it again?"

"The second question is, what is your level ofcommitment? Commitment is measured by yourmotivation and confidence about the goal," Caylaexplained.

"When we started I was motivated and confident.

Now I'm not so sure! I thought the trick would beeasier than it's turning out to be," Steve saidhonestly.


"That's exactly what happens as you movethrough the development continuum!" Cayla saidenthusiastically.

"The what? Are you taking me into a space-timecontinuummagic thing?" Steve joked.

"Thedevelopment continuum issimply a modeloffour stages people usually experience when they arelearningto master something." Cayla reached into hermagic case and pulled out a laminatedcard, which shehanded to Steve.


"In terms of the rubber band trick, look at thesefour stages and tell me where you think you startedand where you are now." Cayla's eyes were bright, asthough she were about to reveal agreat secret.

Steve studied the graphic and pointed to thesquareon the right. "I guess I startedhere, at Dl, withlow competence but high commitment. I moved toD2—low competence with low commitment—prettyquickly though, didn't I?"

Cayla leaned over the table to peer at the card."That's normal," she said. "When you first begin tolearn something or take ona goal, you have this naiveenthusiasm thatovershadows your lack ofcompetence.Once you get into the goal and realize you don't havethe competence, your expectations are shattered."

"Reality shock," Steve said, nodding his headknowingly.

"Exactly!" Cayla seemed pleased with Steve'sunderstanding. "D2, which is short for DevelopmentLevel 2, is a natural stage of learning. It's where yourealize thereis adiscrepancy between theexpectationsyou had in the beginning—Development Level 1 orDl—and the reality of the current situation."

"So, everyone goes through this reality shockevery time theyare learning to do something?" Steveaskedskeptically.

72 I Diagnose Yourself

"The Development Continuum captures whatpeople typically experience, so they can be betterprepared to handle what will probably happen. Ithelps you recognize how your competence andcommitment change as you learn something new orpursue a goal. Significant research validates thesestages of development, but if you simply think aboutthe goals you've accomplished—and ones youhaven't—you'll realize your own experience is proofenough," Cayla said.

Steve picked up two more rubber bands as hereflected on Cayla's words. He entwined the bands,making sure they were placed on his fingers andthumbs the way he'd seen Cayla do it. He stretchedand twisted them for show, then attempted to do thesleight ofhandthatwould separate them as ifbymagic.Again, one of the bands went flying—almost hittingCayla in the forehead.

Steve would have laughed if he hadn't been somortified that he'd nearly pokedout Cayla's eye.

"Okay. Stop, right there." Cayla held up bothhands. "How doyou feel about the tricknow?"

"Frustrated, discouraged, disappointed," Stevesaid. ., *

"That's why the second development level, D2, iscalled the Disillusioned Learner stage."

"What are the other stages called?" Steve asked.


"The first development level, Dl, is called theEnthusiastic Beginner stage. That's where you began.If you make it through the second level, the D2 orDisillusioned Learner stage—where you are now—then you reach D3, which is known as theCapable ButCautious Performer stage. Finally, when you are a self-reliant achiever, you reach D4 or the High Achieverstage." Cayla pointed to each square as she describedit.

"Excuse me, Cayla, but you said if I make itthrough the second stage ofthe Disillusioned Learner,then I go to the third stage of Capable but CautiousPerformer. Whathappens if I don'tmake it?"

"You tell me," Cayla said.Steve reflected a moment. "That's where I give up

and quit, right?""Right," Cayla confirmed. "So, that's your

dilemma on the magic trick right now, is it not? Yourealize it is going to take practice to master it, andyou're not sure it's worth it. Am I right?"

"As usual."

"So quit.""I just might." Steve sounded like a little boy

defying his mother."It's always your choice to quit or keep going,"

Cayla reminded him. "But sometimes you give upwithout conscious choice, so it feels like failure."

.'.\^ric-Zi±M- ••& V'tjc-


"Are you suggesting thatifI choose to quitthen it'snot failure?"

"When you are at the Disillusioned Learnerstage of your goal and you lack competence andcommitment, you are not a failure if you thoughtfullydecide it is not worth the time and effort to proceed,"she said. "You are a selfleadertaking responsibility."

"What if I don'twant to quit?" Steve asked."I'llanswer thatquestion next time. That's the end

ofyour lesson for today," she said with finality.Steve couldn't hide his disappointment. "My

lesson? What is my lesson? I've learned that I'm at thesecond stage of Disillusioned Learner on the magictrick andI'm about ready toquitmyjob—and that's mylesson?"

"Your lesson is to think about what it will take for

you to get to the next level of development," Caylagleefully announced as she headed toward her office.

Steve followed, feeling a sense of deja vu at thenow familiar scene of Cayla riffling through files anddrawers to find what she wanted.

"Here it is." Shehanded Steve a crumpled sheet.


When I am at Dl, the Enthusiastic Beginner

level of development, with Low Competence

and High Commitment, I need:

When I am at D2, the Disillusioned Learner

level of development, with Low to Some

Competence and Low Commitment, I need:

When I am at D3, the Capable But Cautious

Performer level of development, with

Moderate to High Competence and Variable

Commitment, I need:

When I am at D4, the High Achiever level of

development, with High Competence and High

Commitment, I need:


"Your homework assignment is to write downwhat you would need to help you progress fromEnthusiastic Beginner toHigh Achiever onthis rubberband trick," Cayla said. "Remember, I want you toamaze your family and friends with it bythis time nextweek."

"What doyou mean, what I would need?"Cayla stopped dead in her tracks. "Excellent

question." Cayla slapped her open hand to herforehead. "I can't believe I forgot!" She grabbed thesheet from his hand and turned it over to reveal two

columns on the back. Steve was puzzled. He couldhave sworn the back of the sheet was blank when she

first handed it to him.

Pointing to the two columns, she said, "These areexamples of what you need to increase yourcompetence andbuild commitment ifyou aregoing toprogress from Enthusiastic Beginner toHigh Achieveron a goal."

Steve turned the sheet over and over, stillwondering how he could have missed noticing the twocolumns.

COMPETENCE

To increase your

competence to

achieve a goal, ,

you need:

DIRECTION

from someone who

will:

1. Set a clear goal

2. Generate an

action plan

3. Show you how to

do the goal or

skill

4. Clarify roles

5. Provide timelines

6. Establish

priorities

7. Monitor and

evaluate your

work and give

feedback


COMMITMENT

To build your

commitment to

achieve a goal,

you need:

SUPPORT

from someone who

will:

1,

2,

Listen to you

Praise and

encourage you

Facilitate your

problem solving

Ask you for input

Provide rationale

(remind you why

you're doing it)

Share information

about their

experiences

relevant to the

goal

Share information

about the

organization

relevant to the

goal


"I hope this helps clarify what I meant/' Caylasaid. "When your competence is low, you needdirection; when your commitment is low, you needsupport. If you can learn this, you'll know what youneed andwhatto ask forat eachdevelopment level."

"Fine, but once I knowwhat to ask for—who doI ask?"

"That depends," Cayla said. "Ifitsabout themagictrick, you can obviously ask me, other magicians, oreven refer to a book on magic. What if its aboutyourUnited Bank adcampaign? Who do you ask for help onthat?"

"Excellent question," Steve said. Hefelt as thoughhe'd been jolted back into reality. He'd been sowrapped up in the magic trick and learning about thedevelopment continuum, he'd forgotten that the realpoint ofit all was to save his job.

"Think ofyour goal for the United Bank account,"Cayla said. "Think about the skills required to be anaccount executive and orchestrate their ad campaign.Then diagnose your development level on each ofthem. Remember:

When Your

Competence

Is Low, You Need

Direction;

When Your

Commitment

Is Low, You Need

Support.


"I think I've got it!" Steve said as he gave Caylaa high five and gathered his papers. He was eager tocomplete his homework and see how his newknowledge applied tohis job.

Getting What You Need

-Lt wasn't until later the next day that Steve finallyhadtime to focus on Cayla's homework. He wrote outthe answers to the questions, using the Competenceand Commitment columns as aguide.

• When lamatDl, theEnthusiastic Beginnerlevel ofdevelopment, with Low CompetenceandHigh Commitment, I need:

High Directionand Low Support

82I Getting What You Need

• When IamatD2, the Disillusioned Learnerlevel of development, with Low to SomeCompetence and Low Commitment, Ineed:

High Direction and High Support

• When IamatD3, the Capable But CautiousPerformer level of development, withModerate to High Competence and VariableCommitment, I need:

Low Direction and High Support

• When I am atD4, the High Achiever levelofdevelopment, with High Competence andHigh Commitment, Ineed:

Low Direction and Low Support

Steve confirmed that he was at the DisillusionedLearner stage with the rubber band trick—he knewmore than when he started, but still couldn't performthe trick and wasn't sure he ever would.

Getting What You Need183

Now Steve was ready to apply the developmentlevels tohis own job. He began by fisting what he hadbeen responsible for when he was Rhonda's assistant:production budgets, media budgets, and productionschedules. He diagnosed that his development level atthat time had been the same in all of those areas, andthat his needs had also been the same on each:

Goal: Prepare and deliver productionbudgets, media budgets, and productionschedules for Rhonda's accounts withinexpected timelines.My DevelopmentLevel: D4—HighAchieverI Needed: Low Direction and Low Support

In the past he had talked to Rhonda about heraccount and formed it into a budget for productionor media. He had also taken her input and createdproduction schedules. "Piece of cake—I was at D4 onallthe above," he saidaloud. But that wasthen. Nowhedidn't even have the confidence to do the things heusedto take forgranted. He made a note: Used tobeaD4—but I think I've gone backward!

841 Getting What You Need

He turned his attention to what was happeningnow and asked himself: What goals and tasks am Iresponsiblefor as an account executivefor the UnitedBank account? It was then that he had his "aha"moment. His role with United Bank now was verydifferent from his role when he worked with Rhonda—yet he'd considered them the same. There was abig difference between preparing a budget basedon Rhonda's input and having to develop one fromscratch. He didn't have any idea where to begin—letalone how to sell United Bank on it. Considering thecurrentcircumstances, he acknowledged his newgoal:

Goal: Get buy-in from United Bank forproduction budget, media budget, andproduction scheduleMy Development Level: D2—DisillusionedLearner

I Need: High Direction and High Support

As he continued, Stevebegan to see a pattern:

Goal: Provide creative team with positioningand content statements

My Development Level: D2—DisillusionedLearner



Goal: Provide media buyerwith demographictargets, budget, and buying strategyMy Development Level: D2—DisillusionedLearner


Steve shook his head in dismay—no wonder hewas about to lose the account. He needed highdirection and high support and he had gotten neither.He wondered if this was the third trick of selfleadership.

Suddenly the phone rang and jolted him into thepresent. It was Marsha from accounting, remindinghim that they needed his invoicing forms before theend ofthe day. "No problem," Steve said, even thoughit was.

Steve pulled out his accounting file. This is onearea where he knew he was at D3—the Capable ButCautious Performer stage. He had high competence tocomplete theinvoicing forms, buthis commitment wasvariable. He was confident he could complete theforms; he justhadno motivation to doit.

I Need: Low Direction and High Support.


He looked back at Cayla's list to see which ofthe supportive behaviors might stop him fromprocrastinating. Was there someone or some way tokeep him from turning forms in at the last minute?What could he do to overcome his belief that this wasnothing more than bureaucratic busywork? Again,questions for Cayla.

Steve finally completed the paperwork anddropped it off to accounting, hoping no one wouldnotice itwas late. It was long past 5:00 P.M., buthe hadone last bit ofbusiness: to clear his voicemail.

"You have one new message and three savedmessages," the familiar recording announced. Stevepressed "3" to listen.

"Steve, this is Rhonda. We need to talk. I justpicked up amessagefrom Roger at United Bank and heis not pleased. Iunderstand the proposal didnt go well.It would have been nice to hear itfrom you instead ofthe client. This sounds serious. Meet me at Irma'sEateryfor lunch at noon on Monday. I told Roger Ydhandle it, but you need to bring me up to speed. Bringme acopy ofthe original proposal. See you Monday."


Steve hung up and sat down. He had hoped formoretime to put a comprehensive plantogether. Nowhe had just three business days. At least he'd madeprogress. He'd taken responsibility for what happenedat United Bank. He'd broken through his assumedconstraints that the fault was with the client and

creative team. He had acknowledged his task powerand his need for more knowledge power. He haddiagnosed himself at D2—the Disillusioned Learnerstage—with low to some competence and lowcommitment on majoraspects of the project. He knewhe needed high direction and high support. Finally, heknew there were areas of the project where he usedto be at D4—the High Achiever stage, but now herealized he wasn't sure about his commitment.

What he hadn't done was figure outwhat to say toRhonda and how tosave the account. Now hehad onlyuntilnoonon Monday to decide ifhe would handin hisresignation or fight to keep his job. He thought he wasthrough blaming Rhonda, but he felt the anger risingagain. She held his fate in her hands and he didn't knowif he could trust her or not.


Steve couldn't believe it was already Friday. Wherehad the restofthe week gone? Homework in hand, heheaded back to Cayla's Cafe. He found her sitting attheir table, reading a magic book. It was as thoughshe'd anticipated hisneedsonce again.

Barely glancing up from the book, she asked,"How'd you doonyour homework?"

"I was hoping the teacher would check my work."Steve used a lighthearted tone that he hoped wouldcover the tension he felt.

"What's wrong?" Cayla asked."Whew, you're scary." Steve meant it as a

compliment. "Rhonda left me a message. Roger fromUnited Bankcalledher, none too happy. She's meetingme on Monday to 'discuss the account.'" Steve drewquotes intheair toemphasize thelast three words.

"Sounds as though we'd better speed up yourlearning cycle," Cayla said as she cleared thetable. "Doyou have the laminated card I gave you that shows thedevelopment continuum?"

Steve found the dog-eared card in his notebookand handed it to Cayla.

Cayla tore the cardin half."What are you doing?" Steve said, trying to keep

his voice down.


Cayla stacked the two halves together and torethem in two.

"Oh, a trick?" Steve allowed.Cayla took the four pieces and put them in the

palm ofher left hand. She laid her right palm on top,encasing the torn shards of paper between her twopalms. She then raised her hands in prayer positionand rubbed her palms back and forth as thoughgrinding the pieces together.

"Ifthis comes outinone piece, I'mgoing tofreak,"Steve said, more to himself thanto Cayla.

Sure enough, when Cayla opened her hands, onepiece of paper fell to the table. Her eyes met Steve sand looked back down atthepiece ofpaper, beckoninghim to pick it up. Steve tentatively took the paper,unfolded it, andgasped at thenew image.

90 / Getting What You Need

The Needs Model

High

° Seethe full-color modelprintedon the insidecoverof thisbook.


Caylabasked in Steve's awe for a moment beforeexplaining. "This model will help guide you. For eachdevelopment level, thereis acorresponding leadershipstyle to provide you with the appropriate amountof direction and/or support you need. At the Dl—Enthusiastic Beginner stage, you need an SIleadership style: Directing. Atthe D2—DisillusionedLearner stage, you need an S2 leadership style:Coaching. At the D3—Capable But CautiousPerformer stage, you need an S3 leadership style:Supporting. At the D4—High Achiever stage, youneedan S4 leadership style: Delegating. Pull outyourhomework and let's compare your answers with themodel."

"I think I deserve highmarks for this," Steve said,giving himself a verbal pat on the back. "The NeedsModel will make it easy to remember, but I think Idid a good job of figuring it out from the lists ofdirective andsupportive behaviors you gave me to useas reference."

"Definitely an A plus," Cayla concurred afterstudying his work. "And you deserve special credit forunderstanding regression."

Steve was afraid he'd get marked down for notknowing what she meant, so he smiled as though hedid. Cayla must have picked up on this, because sheproceeded to explain what she meant.

92 / Getting What You Need

"You picked up on the ideathat you canbe at theHigh Achiever D4 stage on something and regressbackward to the Capable But Cautious PerformerD3stage," she said.

"Regression is a great word to describe whathappened to me," Steve said. "I was at the D4—HighAchiever stage on budgets andproduction schedulingwhen I worked with Rhonda. But I've become so

discouraged lately that if she called me to do thesame things I used to do, I'm not sure I'd have theconfidence to do them. I've definitely regressed fromthe High Achieving stage to the Capable But CautiousPerformer stage."

"Good diagnosis," Cayla said, complimentingSteve. "You also seem to understand that in your newrole as an account executive, you began at the Dl—Enthusiastic Beginner stage, gathering informationfrom the client, analyzing theirneeds, andgenerating aplan from scratch. But now you are atthe DisillusionedLearner stage."

"It's embarrassing, but I was so naive that I didn'tknow I was supposed to gather information from theclient in the first place. I was enthusiastically tryingto create plans from thin air! When it didn't work, Iquickly moved to disillusionment."

"It's all a part of the learning process," Cayla saidphilosophically.


Steve sighed. "If I'd had the Needs Model fromthe beginning I could have worked with Rhonda to getmyneeds met. The questionnowis: Is it too late?"

"It's never too late to try," Cayla said. "I'm sureyou'll find some answers this weekend as you prepareforyourlunchmeeting with Rhonda."

At the mention of the weekend, Steve realized hewas already late forhis Friday nightdinnerwith Blair.

7

Running Together

*lair was waiting patiently when Steve arrived. Hewas relieved to see her, but feeling guilty. He shouldhavecalledto tell her he was runninglate.

"Sonyto keepyou waiting," he saidashe gave hera heartfelt hug.

"I was afraid something happened," she said.Steve heard genuine concern—not scolding—in

her voice.

"You've been so busywe haven't gotten togetherallweek. What's going on?" she asked.

"Alot,"Steve replied."You okay?" she asked."Physically, yes," he saidcryptically.

Running Together 195

Over dinner at their favorite Mexican restaurant,

Steve shared the strange events of the past week. Hebegan with the botched ad campaign proposal forUnited Bank and how it led to meeting Cayla. Hepulled out one of his business cards and asked Blair ifshe had a pair of scissors in her purse. She looked athim quizzically. Smiling mischievously, he asked herto cut a hole in the card large enough for him to putaround his head.

"That's why you're upset? Astrange woman askedyou to cut a hole in your business card and stick yourhead through it?"

Steve laughed for the first time that evening,"Partly," he kidded. "Now, go ahead. Tiyit."

"It's a trick." Blairrefusedto pickup the scissors."You're absolutelyright!" Steve saidwith enthusiasm.

"Actually, it's the first trick of a self-leader." He toldher about elephant thinking and the importance ofchallenging assumed constraints. He then took thescissors, cut the cardintoa large ring, andplaced it overher head. The people at the next table—who'd beenstealing glances theirway—clapped inappreciation.

"Okay," Blair said, "so what did you do with thisrevelation about assumed constraints?"

96 / Running Together

Steve described the meeting withhisteam,wherehe'd realized that his assumptions about his teammembers, the client, and his role had made him avictim. "I'm not exactiy a natural-born leader,"he saidwith a shake ofhis head.

Blair reached out and touched his hand. "Is that

why I didn't see you last weekend—because you'refeeling down on yourself? Did your motorcycle ridehelp at all?"

"I almost forgot about that, and it's the strangestpart yet."

"What happened?" Blair asked.Steve told her how his Harley had mysteriously

died, and about his bizarre roadside meeting withCayla. He described the trip to the legendary Hal'sHarleys dealership, theconversation about power, andthe mysterious "receipt" revealing the second trick ofselfleadership.

"So what's the trick?" she asked, sounding bothcuriousand skeptical.

Steve handedthe receipt to her." 'Celebrate your points of power,'" Blair said,

reading from the slip ofpaper."I certainly didn't use my points ofpower with the

United Bank account project," Steve said. "I shouldhave been the one initiating action and directingothers."


"But how could you lead others when you didn'tevenknow whatyouweredoing? You've neverbeen anaccount executive before." Blair's statement surprisedSteve. How could it be so clear to her, when he hadneeded Cayla to point it out to him?

"I finally realized that today. I think I'm in themidst of learning the final trick. At first I diagnosedmyself at the Dl—Enthusiastic Beginner stage onalmost every aspect ofmy role, but because I didn'tgetthe SI—Directing leadership style I needed, I'm nowat the D2—Disillusioned Learner stage, and I needan S2—Coaching leadership style. On some things,such as budgeting and scheduling, I was at the D4—High Achiever stage and fine with an S4—Delegatingleadership style. But now I'm not sure I'm ascompetent as I thought, so I've regressed to the D3—Capable But Cautious Performer stage, requiringan S3—Supporting style of leadership." The wordstumbled from Steve's lips withoutpause.

When he was finished, Blair was staringblankly athim. "I haveno idea whatyoujust said."

Steve roared with laughter. "I must sound likeI'm speaking a foreign language. Wait just a second."Steve rose from the table and disappeared around thecorner. When he returned, he had two rubber bandsthat he'd managed to get from the restaurant's frontdesk.

981 Running Together

"I was talking about the four stages of learningsomething new," he said. "I'm going to show you arubber band trick as an example." He began teachingBlair the magic trick, pulling out the laminated cardwith the Needs Model andusing it for reference.

The Needs Model

High

and jSfLHfgh Suppose /#>-,

;.BehaviorL ••':'-• •• \/r^/\ -.i'tiiilhlki" ••*/.&/'! •'• •\p3;Qectdes;; •' 4M0/. •'''••.• •

mHHM S1

llPliliJiillLow -DIRECTIVE BEHAVIOR • • High


After a few minutes, they decided they were bothat D2 on the rubber band trick.

Blair's eyes grewbright as she sawthe connectionbetween the rubber band trick and Steve's work.

"So as far as your job goes, you've diagnosedyourself at the D2—Disillusioned Learner stage onmost of your important goals, and you've determinedthat you need more direction and support to succeedin your job." Blairfrowned. "So where do you go fromhere?"

Steve confidedthat he had until noon on Mondayto figure it out. "I'm not sure if I should resign and endthe pain or fight for myjob and riskhaving Rhonda fireme. What do you think?"

"I thinkyouare verylucky to have run into Cayla,"Blairsaid. "I'll make you a deal. If you'll help me withmy 10K run tomorrow, I'll help you think through aplan for your meetingwith Rhonda."

"Oh, man! I've been so wrapped up in my ownproblems I forgot you have your first race tomorrow."Steveshookhis head. "I want to help, but I'm not surewhat I can do between nowand tomorrowmorning."


"Here's my diagnosis," Blair said, referring tothe Needs Model. "When it comes to my trainingschedule, I'm capable of the short runs during theweek. But I'm never confident that I'll finish that 10K

practice run on the weekend. I think I'm stuck at D3—the Capable But Cautious Performer stage. For therace tomorrow I'm at the D2—Disillusioned Learner

stage. I've never run in a race with hundreds ofpeople before, so mycompetence is low. I don't knowhow I'll react and I'm afraid. Guess that means mycommitment is low. What if I can't finish?"

"Come on, Blair," Steve encouraged. "You canwalk six miles ifyouhave to."

'What if I come in last? I'll be horrified." Blair puther hands over her eyes as though trying to blockoutthe sightofher straggling in in lastplace.

Steve laughed. "You are a Disillusioned Learner!Howcan I help you?"

"I've got an idea." Blair's mischievous smile madeSteve wonder what he'd gotten himself into. "I haverelationship power with you, and I'm going to use it.Here's myrequest: Runwith me. You've run in dozensof races and knowwhat it's like. You have knowledgepower. Be my running partner and coach. I need anS2—Coaching leadership style, with lots of directionand support."


"Are you kidding? I haven't trained," Stevecomplained.

"As slow as I am, you don't need training to keepup!"Blairsaid. "We cantalkaboutit on the wayhome."

# # *

As the sun cameup Saturday morning, Steve put on hisrunning gear, did some quick warm-ups, and headedout the door to pickup Blair.

Blair beamed when she saw Steve in his runningclothes. "I knewyou'dgofor it,"she saidasshe handedhim a bagel and a sport drink. "I had a feeling youmight need this," she added a little smugly.

"I realized I couldn't turn down a self leader in

need," Stevesaidwith a smile. "You askedfor help andthat takes strength. It's hard to turn someone downwho knows what they need."

"I've been thinking about that," Blair responded."The two tricksCayla taught youare potent. I wouldn'tbe a runner at all if I hadn't used them—I just wasn'taware I was usingthem."

"Explain," Steveurged.

102 I Running Together

"Remember when I first started running? Ibought cute shorts and tops, running shoes, goodsocks. I had all the best stuff. I was feeling veryproudof myself. I tookoffdown the street, ran the first block,and began to feel my thigh muscles tighten. I tried tocontrol my breathing, but I couldn't get any air. I gotthat sidestitchthat wouldn't goaway."

Steve chuckled. "I remember your excuse. Yousaid, 1 must have fast twitch muscles. They're notreally built for long-distance running. Running isn'tthat good for myknees, anyway' "

"I didn't whine like that!" Blair reached over

and lightly shoved Steve. "Anyway, I wanted to quit. Istarted off at the Dl—Enthusiastic Beginner stageand it only took me two blocks to get to the D2—Disillusioned Learner stage! Do you remember whatyou told me?"

Steveshrugged, "Remindme.""You explained that running uses very different

muscles than what I was used to. You told me it was

going to require more effortthan buying goodshoes.""I nailedthat one,"Steve saidproudly."The interestingthingis,I used to be a pretty good

sprinter and never thought I could run longer than ahundred yards. That was myassumedconstraint."

"Not fast twitch muscles?" Steve chided.


Blair sounded a little defensive as she responded,"Maybe I did have fast twitch muscles, but that didn'tmean I couldn't run ten kilometers."

"Sowhat didyouneed?"Steve asked."I needed coaching," Blair responded. "I needed

to learn to run differently. I neededsomeone to showme how. Someone to observe, monitor, and evaluatemy running and give me feedback. When I started Ineeded an SI—Directing leadership style, but since Inever got it, I was at the pointwhere I needed an S2—Coaching style ofleadership."

Stevewas impressed. "I remember now. You wentto a friend who was a high school cross-country coachand he helped you puta training program together."

"I used my relationship power to find someonewith knowledge power," Blair explained. "He helpedme map out an entirestrategy that included a runningsupport group, getting feedback on my breathing andrunning technique, subscribing toarunning magazine,and having you lovingly hold me accountable formeeting mytraining schedule."

"Ihave a feeling this is leading to something otherthan your running," Steve said suspiciously.

"Don't you see? Think about it:

When Goals Work Out,

It Is Usually Because

You Instinctively

Take The Initiative

To BeA SelfLeader

And Get What You Need

To Succeed.

#


"Exactly," Steve agreed. "And Cayla has revealedwhy some of our goals aren't reached—because ourassumed constraints defeat us."

"It occurred to me that a big mistake we make inourjobs is thinking thatthe only place to getdirectionandsupport is from our managers," Blair said. "But asyou realized with your team the other day, that'san assumed constraint. Steve, you have a number ofpeople and resources you can tap into to get thedirection and support you need to turn this UnitedBank account around. I have a feeling you have pointsof power you haven't begun to use." Blair paused fora moment before adding, "We need to map out astrategy for your meeting with Rhonda; just like I didwith myrunning. I thinkit will work!"

She said it with such optimism that Steve's spiritswere lifted. "If it doesn't work out, I can always fallback on my exit strategy andquit," he said.

Blair let out a heavy sigh. "I think quitting is justyour way of feeling some sense of control in afrightening situation. For now, let's focus on today'sgoal."

Steve pulledinto the parking lot, wherehundredsof runners were congregated. "What is your goaltoday?" he asked. "What time are you trying to make?"

Blair laughed out loud. "My goal is: Complete theannual charity 10K race."


"Fair enough. If just finishing the race ismotivating enough, that's what we'll focus on doing.But I think you should set one standard," he said.Calling Blair's attention to what appeared to be aneighty-year-old woman, he declared, "I think youshould try to beat her."

Blairdidn't take the bait. "That's not a smart goal!I have no control over how fast that woman runs. It'd

be just my luck that she holds the national title forsenior women."

"Shouldn't you have some standard?" Steve askedin all seriousness.

"Okay, how about this: My goal isnot to be the lastone over the finish line. That means that if I can't

continue, you have to carry me over!"They made their way to the registration table,

picked up their numbers, and pinned them on theirT-shirts. All kinds ofpeople milled around the boothsthat offered food, drink, products, promotions, andmassages. Music filled the air. The atmosphere waselectric and Steve felt energized. It was fun just beingpart of the event.

People were gathering at the starting line. Blairand Steve were positioned midway in the pack whenBlair darted forward, weaving her way to the front. Sheturned backandsignaled forSteve to follow her.


"She doesn't know thefront ofthepack is reservedfor qualified runners and sponsored professionals!"Stevethought aloud. He wonderedif she wouldnoticethat the numbers pinned to their shirts were in therange of 003 and hers was 2045. As she reached thefront row, he realized she was too pumped up to noticemuchofanything.

"On your mark," the starter bellowed from thePA system. Steve hadn't reacted in time to stop Blair."Get set." The shot of the starting gun rang out.They were off. The exhilaration he had at the start of arace thrilled Steve. He could actually feel the groundshaking from the thousands of feet pounding behindhim. As he sprinted up to catch Blair he could hearthecollective breathing of hundreds of runners. Withinseconds theywere passing by.

"Unbelievable!" Blair shouted. "Why are peoplerunning sofast this early in the race? I'll neverfinish ifI try tokeep up." She didn't know how topace herself."I'm already ready to give up! What should I do,coach?"

"Just make it to the fountain."She smiled through herpain. "Okay, so I make it to

the fountain, then what?" she asked, breathing hard."Feel the spray coming off the fountain. It's

invigorating! And, remember your goal.""Oh, yeah. Finish."


"What happened there at the start of the race?"Steve's question was more than a query. He hoped itwould guide her to a realization.

"I got so excited—I decided to go for it! I thoughtmaybe I could win my age group orsomething."

Steve found Blair's innocence endearing. "Thatwould be something, wouldn't it? To win your agegroup in your first race, after training for a couple ofmonths." He tried not to soundtoojudgmental.

Blair got it. "Oh, how embarrassing," she saidbetween breaths. "I acted as though I wereat the HighAchiever stage—starting up front, thinking I couldoutpace or at least keep pace with the best. I wasactually at the classic Enthusiastic Beginner stage! Sothat's why I'm back at the Disillusioned Learner stage.It didn't take me long to get from Dl to D2, did it?"Sheclearly didn't need an answer.

Steve replied anyway. "Remember the old Italianproverb: Things get harder before they get easier."It struck him that he needed to heed the adagehimself. His frustration with his job, he noted, was anormal part of the learning curve that needed to beacknowledged anddealtwith. It wasn't a reason to quit.

Soon they passed the fountain and felt theinvigorating spray. "I made that milestone," Blairpanted. "Now what?"

"Keep going, one step atatime," Steve replied.


For the rest of the race, Blair asked Steve for—and gave herself—as much direction and support asshe could: Just make it around the corner Goodgirl Now just make it up to those two people—theydont seem thatfast. Way to go, Blair! She encouragedherself out loud so Steve could add something ifhe thought she needed it. Every once in a while sheasked Steve for specific directions. Am Iusing my armsefficientlyforuphill climbs? Do Ineed to do somethingdifferent as we go downhill? IfVm breathing too hardto talk does that mean Tm pacing myself too fast andshould slow downforabit? Sometimes Steve gave herdirect answers; sometimes he asked her to experienceit andreport back what she thought was best.

An hour into the race, Steve was jogging easily.Such was not the case for Blair. She was huffing andpuffing, almost wheezing.

At last they caught sight ofthe finish line. "Okay,coach," Blair managed to pant, "other runners havesaid this was where they get that rush ofadrenaline—their second wind—and sprint for the finish. I don'thave any hope—I'm not sure I ever found my firstwind. My legs are like lead. My lungs ache. I hope I canfinish."


Steve was really worried. He didn't want to carryher across. Then, they heard familiar voices cheeringfrom the sidelines. Theyglanced overand saw a groupoffriends yelling andscreaming like crazy.

"Oh,wow!" Blair said, "I didn't know they'd allbehere!" She smiled despite thepain. "I'msurethey're inshock seeing that I'm still upright!"

"And that you're not last," Steve added with awink.

With that, Blair's entire face and body changed.She caught her second wind. "Let's go!" she shouted,waving to their friends as she took off. Steve was justready tokick itup anotch when hethought henoticedanother familiar face in the crowd. Was that Cayla,cheering them on? No, it couldn't be. He looked againand the face wasgone.

Blair beat him to the finish line. When he arrived,Blair hugged him jubilantly. "Thank you, thank you,thank you!" she bubbled. He hugged back butkept herwalking, fearing her legs might cramp.

"Look!" Blair said, pointing toward the finish fine,"People arestill finishing!"

Running Together I 111

People were still coming in, buteven more runnershad finished before them. Ithad taken them just over anhour to run 6.2 miles. That was not a particularly fasttime. At that moment Steve had an epiphany. He knewBlair was a very competitive person. Yet curiously,knowing that hundreds ofpeople had finished beforeshe did didn't bother her. In fact, she was overjoyed tofinish the race—to have achieved her goal. It didn'tmatter what the others had done.

Therace helped Steve realize:

a

There Is Magic

In Diagnosing Your

Development Level

And Getting The

Direction And Support

You Need To Achieve

Your Goal.

#


Without getting what she needed, Blair wouldhave quit after fifteen minutes. Just as he was aboutto quit after a couple ofmonths ofbeing an accountexecutive.

Soon they were surrounded by their friends. Theyspent the next hour collecting their new T-shirts andenjoying the booths, exhibits, and goodies that comewith finishing the race. As they walked to their cars,Blair hugged each oftheir friends.

"You all gave me the support I needed, when Ineeded it," she said. "Thank you for reminding us thatthere are so many ways to get what we need—andfriends area great place tostart."

Later, as they sat in the traffic fine inching towardthe parking lot attendant, Steve asked Blair to sortthrough the bag ofcoupons and free samples and findtheirparking ticket.

"Are you sure you put it in here?" she asked. "Ican't find it."

They were at the parking lot pay booth. Stevehatedholding uptraffic. Herolled down thewindow toexplain that they were still searching for the ticket."Don't worry, it's taken care of,"the attendant said.

"Whatdoyoumean?" Steve asked.


"That woman paid for you." The attendantpointed up ahead, where a small woman on a Harley-Davidson roared through theexit. "She said somethingabout being proud ofyou," the attendant said as hehanded Steve a receipt.

Steve thanked the attendant, handed Blair thereceipt, and pulled onto the highway. "That was Caylaup ahead," he said in an amazed tone of voice. "Ithought I saw her in the crowd, but figured I wasseeingthings."

"Did you tell her we'd be here?" Blair asked."I don't remember," Steve said."Well, this is no ordinary parking receipt," Blair

said as she held it up for Steve to see. The receipt wasemblazoned with the message:

The Third Trick of Self Leadership:

Collaborate

for Success!

8

No Excuses

LJtteve was a man with a plan, out the door at 7:00a.m. on Monday. First stop: Cayla's Cafe. Instead ofbeelining it for the coffee counter, he immediatelylooked around for Cayla and found her sitting at thesame old table.

"You have a lotofexplaining to do, Cayla.""Do I?" she said, arching her brows."I don'twant to sound ungrateful, but mycuriosity

is killing me."Awaitress beganto bus the table nextto them, and

Steve took a few moments to order coffee and scones

for them.

"Okay, backto the explanations," Steve said.

116/No Excuses

Cayla met hisgaze. "I'm quite sure youhavemanylegitimate questions, but don't you think we ought tofocus on the most important questions first? How areyou going to handle your lunch with Rhonda? Howare you going to save your job? How are you goingtoimplement the planyouand Blair put together?"

"See? That's what I mean!" Steve said in a risingvoice. "How do you know Blair and I put a plantogether?"

Cayla made a palm-down motion. "Calm yourself.I saw the two of you during the race. It was a perfectexample ofcollaborating for success. You are both verybright, so I just figured you would leverage yourpartnership and comeup witha plan for today."

"Fine," said Steve. "Your great powers ofobservation and reasoning haveworkedagain. Butwhywere you there observing in the first place? I don'tremember tellingyouabout the race."

Again Cayla responded matter-of-factly. "I knewsome other people in the race, and I was there tocheer them on. You might have noticed one of them—a wonderful lady. She's almost eighty and she's stillrunning! Finishedbeforethe two ofyou, I mightadd."

"Glad Blair didn't notice that," Steve said underhis breath.

"Whatwasthat?" Cayla asked.

No Excuses 1117

"Nothing," Steve saidwith a half-smile. "I guess Ijumped to conclusions. But you have to admit therehave been an inordinate number of coincidences

lately. Likeour chance meetingnear Hal's Harleys, forexample."

"Life is full of pleasant surprises," Cayla said."Look, you have only a few hours before your bigmeeting with Rhonda. What questions do you haveabout your plan?"

Steve pulled out the multi-page plan that he andBlair had created and handed it to Cayla. It wasthen that he realized they hadn't gotten their coffeeand scones. As the waitress walked by, he caught herattention.

"Excuse me," he said abruptly. "Is our order onthe way?" The waitress nodded and walkedoff.

Cayla was still concentrating on the plan, makinglittle noises in apparent approval. Steve decided thather "uh hum's" were not enough, and decided to askfor feedback.

"Since I'm at the D2—Disillusioned Learner

stage as a self leader—especially when it comes to mymeeting with Rhonda—is it okay to ask you for morespecifics?"

Cayla didn't respond immediately. She seemed tobe weighinghis question.

1181 No Excuses

Fearing he'd blundered, Steve stuttered, "If youcan't, I mean,ifyoudon'twantto give me feedback—"

Cayla put her finger to her mouth. "Watch," shewhispered.

As the waitress walked byagain, Cayla reachedoutto get her attention. "Excuse me. I need to ask youabout our order. My colleague here is gettinggrumpywithouthismorning Java!" shesaid witha smile.

"Oh, I know the feeling! Let me check." Thewaitress turned around and hurried back to the coffee

counter.

"Thanks so much, Gail," Cayla called, oozingappreciation.

Gail returned a few seconds later with the coffee

and scones.

"Must be your charming personality," Stevequipped. "She ignored me when I asked."

"Not charm—technique," Cayla explained. "Isimply used the two most powerful words in the English language to get what I needed."

" Thanks, Gail'?" Steve ventured."That didn't hurt, I suppose. But that's not really

what made the difference. Think about the way youaddressedGailversus the way I handled the situation."

Stevewasthoroughly confused.

No Excuses 1119

Cayla provided the answer. "I used the two mostpowerful words in the English language for gettingcooperation."

Steve waited to hear what the two words were.

"Z need/9 Cayla declared."That sit?"

"Correct," Cayla saidfirmly."That's interesting; Cayla, butwhat does thathave

to dowith you giving me feedback?""It's not that I don'twant to give you feedback, it's

just that there is a much more powerful way for you togetfeedback from me. Don't ask."

Now Steve was totally lost. "But I thought I shouldbeproactive as aselfleader and ask for feedback."

"I said get the feedback—I didn't say ask for it.Let me be more precise. Don't put the request in theform of a question. In this case, playing Jeopardy!puts you in jeopardy." Cayla smiled at her play onwords before reinforcing:

a

The Two Most

Powerful Words

To Collaborate

For Success Are:

"I NEED."

No Excuses 1121

"As a self leader, it is your responsibility to getthe feedback, direction, and support you need," saidCayla. "The problem isthat instead ofstating what youneed in a direct, forthright manner—especially whenyou are at the D2—Disillusioned Learnerstage—youget trapped asking dumbquestions."

"Like what?" Steve queried, fearing he'd justasked one.

"Here's a great example," Cayla said, full ofenthusiasm. "A man got on the subway in New YorkCity, and discovered that therewas only one seat left.But there was something on the seat that he didn'twant on his slacks, sohe laidhis newspaper down andsat on it. A few moments later a woman tapped himon the shoulder and asked, 'Excuse me, sir, are youreading your newspaper?' The man thought that wasone of the dumbest questions he'd ever heard. Hecouldn't help himself. He stood up, turned the page,sat back down on the paper, and replied, Tes ma'am,

am.

Cayla laughed at her story. "That's the problemwitha dumb question. You get a dumb answer."

Steve cracked up—more at Cayla thanather story.But he wasn't sure about this question thing. Howcould he ask for helpwithout asking a question? Stevetook a risk.

122 I No Excuses

"Cayla, I hope this isn't another dumb question.But what makes a question dumb? Obviously not allquestions are dumb. In fact, I've always heard thatthere's nosuch thing as a dumb question."

"Smart question," Cayla said. "There are threetypes of dumb questions. One, when the answer isobvious. Two, when you're not willing tohearacertainresponse. And three, when you already know whatyou want to hear.

"Forexample, Rhonda isrunning around with herhead cutoff, butyou need some help. So you ask, 'Areyou busy?' That's a dumb question. Of course she'sbusy! So she says something like, There just aren'tenough hours in the day' You feel guilty, so you getflustered and leave her alone so as not to add to herburden.

"It is better for you to just simply state yourneeds truthfully: 'Rhonda, I need fifteen minutes ofyour time to discuss this project. If this isn't a goodtime, I can come back at three o'clock.' "

Steve couldn't deny that he often asked whatappeared to be the dumb question instead of statinghis needs direcdy. "What makes the 'I need' phrase sopowerful?"he asked.

No Excuses 1123

"When you tell someone you want something,their first thought is usually, We all want things wecan't have. When you use the I need phrase, you'recoming from a position of strength. You've thoughtabout what it's going to take to succeed and arerequesting a person's help. It's amazing, but humanbeings love to feel needed. Theylove to think they canhelp you. T need' isverycompelling."

"All right. I'll try not to ask dumb questions. But Ireserve the right to asksmartones," Steve said. "How'sthis: I need specific feedback on my plan so I can getwhat I need to make it work."

Cayla complied immediately by turning herattention to Steve's neatlyprinted plan.Afterreadingitover, she summarized:

"You challenge assumed constraints, the firsttrick of self leadership, by listing potential and actualassumed constraints that could limit your successon the United Bank account. The way you turnedyour assumed constraints around is very effective. Iespecially liked this one: 'My assumed constraint isthat I think Roger is egotistical and won't listen toanything I say' The turn-around statement: 'Roger isnot egotistical and isopen to myrecommendations.'

1241 No Excuses

"You celebrate your points of power, thesecond trick of self leadership, by highlighting yourstrengths and resources. But you've gone even onestep further and identified other people who havepoints of power that you can draw upon as youimplement your plan. You must feel good aboutthat.

"And, finally, you have started using the thirdtrickofselfleadership—collaborate for success—byprioritizing your most important goals on the UnitedBank account, diagnosing your development level oneach of them, and determining the leadership styleyou need."

For the next hour, Cayla helped Steve create anagenda for his meeting with Rhonda. Finally, it wastime for Steve to go. He packedup the papers and tooka last swig ofhis nowcoldmocha. Beforehe left, Stevereached over andgave her abig hug.

"This meanta lotto metoday. I won'tforgetit—nomatter what happens." He said the words with suchsinceritythat even he was surprised.

Cayla was visibly moved. She squeezed his armand headed for her office. As Steve walked out the

door, he heard her voice calling out:"Don't get derailed by disillusionment!"Steve smiled. Cayla always seemed to have the

last word.

No Excuses 1125

Time towork the magic, Steve thought.He straightened his already straight tie and

glanced in the rearview mirror to get a sense ofhimselfbefore going into Irma's Eatery. He was a few minutesearly. The last thing he wanted to do was to keepRhondawaiting.

Briefcase in hand, he found the most privatebooth available and faced forward so he could catch

Rhonda's attention when she entered. He pulled outhis notes, the United Bank proposal, and his PalmPilot. The waitress droppedoffa glass oficewater.

"Thanks, Tina. I need another glass—someonewill be joiningme for lunch." Steve smiledat howwellthe littie things worked. Tina was notonly prompt, butattentive.

"Looks like animportant meeting," Tinaobserved."Could be one of the most important in my

career so far, as a matter of fact," Steve revealed."Is there anything I can do to make it go more

smoothly?"

1261 No Excuses

"Wow, that's really kindofyou," Steve said. "Cometo thinkofit,yes. If this istoomuchto ask, let meknow.I need to stay focused, so rather than checking inon how we're doing and risk interrupting a delicatemoment, I'd appreciate it if you wait for me to signalthat we need something. Oh, and make sure you givethe check to me."

"Consider it done." Tina gave the thumbs-upsign."And goodluck!"

Steve smiled. It feltgood to have a collaborator forsuccess.

Outside the window, a silver-gray BMW pulledinto the parking lot. He watched as Rhonda gatheredher things and made her way to the restaurant'sentrance. Confident, poised, and energetic, Rhondawas someone Steve admired on general principle.He prepared himself for her direct, no-nonsenseapproach. She would pull no punches, get right tothe point, and leave with a general plan of action. Asnervous as he was, he realized how much he wanted towork with her—he had so much to learn.

He stood so she could spot him. She smiled. Heobserved that the smile was genuine, but restrained.He understood that she needed to hold back, giventhe seriousness of the situation.

No Excuses 1127

Steve stepped out ofthebooth to greet her. Theydid asemi-professional half-handshake, half-hug hello.After Rhonda sat, so did Steve.

Typically, Steve would wait for Rhonda to speak.He would listen, formulate an opinion, and thendecide how or if to respond. But this was a time to bebold, so before Rhonda began, Steve launched thefirstvolley.

"Rhonda, I know you cut your trip short becauseof this meeting. You expressed disappointment thatyou heard about the outcome of the presentationfrom Roger and United Bank before you heard fromme. I'm not going to give you excuses. I think yourdisappointment is warranted. I'm here to bring youup to speed with what I know and Hsten to what youthink. But, I also need you to know that I've done myhomework. I have ideas for moving forward and Itrust you'll beopen todiscussing them."

"What kind of ideas?" Rhonda asked, cutting tothe chase.

1281 No Excuses

"I've got a two-pronged approach. One is astrategy for communicating with Roger and rescuingthe ad campaign. Obviously that is the most pressingconcern for you and Creative Advertising. The secondapproach is a plan for the way you and I shouldcollaborate going forward. I didn't realize until thispast week that I need help from you and others to domy job effectively while I'm on the learning curve. Iplan to be much more proactive in the future to getwhat I need to succeed—and not let youor the agencydown."

Rhonda tooka moment before replying. "There'sno doubt the United Bank account is in crisis," shesaid. "IfI hada dollar for every time we've hadto rallyto save aclient I could retire. I needtogetyourupdate,but I'm confident we can save this one," Rhonda said.

Steve heaved a silent sigh of relief. Losing hisjob would have been bad enough, but the guilt fromlosing the account would have made it worse. He wasreaching for the proposal to begin filling Rhonda in,but she wasn't finished.

"Frankly, Steve, I am more worried about you.I know how conscientious you are about your work,and the pride you take in doing good work. I don'twantto lose you, but I feel you slipping away."

No Excuses 1129

Steve could barely take it in. She was afraid oflosing him? He blurted out what couldhave been thedumbestquestion he'd everasked.

"You meanyouaren't going to fire me?"To his astonishment, Rhonda laughed. "I'm sorry,"

Rhonda said, trying to control her amusement. "Iremember hearing a story—who knows if it's true, butit's a great story—about Tom Watson, the legendaryleader of IRM. A young man sent to Watson's officewas terrified because he'd been in charge ofaprojectthat had lost thousands of dollars—maybe millions.The number goes up every time I hear the story.Anyway, the young man went into this intimidatingoffice and Watson said, Tell me what happened, whatyou learned, what went right, what went wrong.' Sofor an hour the young man spilled his guts, toldWatson everything he thought was relevant. At theend of the meeting Watson thanked the young manand shook his hand. The young man sat there stunnedand asked the same question you just asked me—'You're not going to fire me?' You know what Watsonsaid?"

Steve shook his head. "What?"

230 / No Excuses

"Story has it that Watson bellowed, Tire you? Ijust spent thousands ofdollars training you, why wouldI fire you?' " Rhonda laughed her hearty, full-throatedlaugh. "Steve, I'm in the same boat as Watson. I figureyou've learned more in the last week than any MBAprogram could teach. I can't afford to fire you!"

Not one to trust good news immediately, Stevehadone more question. "Iheard rumors thatyou weregoing toreplace me with Grant on the account."

Rhonda screwed up her face in a look Stevecouldn't decipher. He waited for her to respond.Finally she said, "Remember the children's game oftelephone, where one kid whispered a message inanother's ear, and that kid passed it to the next kid,and by the time the message got back around it wasa totaldistortion ofthe original message?"

"So what was theoriginal message?" Steve asked."It wasn't a message; it was just an idea I was

considering. Grant has real potential and wonderfulpeople skills, but he lacks focus and attention todetail—the very qualities you have in spades. Mythought was to have him become your junior accountexecutive so you could teach him a wider variety ofskills."

No Excuses 1131

Steve felt like jumping for joy. "Well, if you'renot firing me, and I'm not quitting, I guess we've got alot ofwork to do. And I obviously have a lot to learnbefore I start mentoring Grant. Let's order lunch andI'll show you my plans." Steve signaled Tina, who wason the spotin a second.

As they ate, Steve showed the United Bankproposal to Rhonda, explaining why he thoughtthe client rejected the budget, production plan, andcreative approach. "I was a master budget andschedule-maker when I assisted you, but I didn't—I don't—know how to gather the right informationand get buy-in from the client. Those were yourresponsibilities that I never learned to do."

Steve had decided to avoid using the D-ladenlanguage ofthe Needs Model. The model would guidehis thoughts and comments, but he feared it wouldconfuse things to speak a language Rhonda didn'tknow. But as he shared his insights he rememberedhow much easier it had been to communicate withBlair when they both spoke the language. So hepulled out the Needs Model and gave Rhonda a briefoverview.

1321 No Excuses

Rhonda was more than receptive. She asked forspecific examples. Steve pulled out the sheet where hehad prioritized his goals, diagnosed his developmentlevel on each, and determined the leadership stylehe needed. He explained to Rhonda that she wasn'ttheonly one hewould rely on for leadership.

"I've challenged the assumed constraints I hadabout my team and the client. I've also celebrated mypoints ofpower and come to realize there are manypeople and resources available to me. Inother words,you're not the only one who can lead me."

Rhonda seemed relieved that the responsibilitywas not entirelyhers. "Soyou'resaying:

A Leader Is

Anyone Who

Can Give You the

Support AndDirection

You Need

To Achieve

Your Goal.

#

134/No Excuses

"That's right!" Steve said brightly. "But, as mymentor, coach, boss, and right now, savior of theUnited Bank account, I need as much direction as Ican get from you."

"Well, here it comes," Rhonda warned. "Thereason this presentation failed is because you focusedon what you were comfortable with and missed thepoint. You attempted to use the budget and productionschedule to drive the strategy. Its got to be the otherway around. Strategic approach first, then creative,then budgets and schedules. You went with whatyou knew, but in this case it took you in the wrongdirection. That's why Peter and Alexa couldn't comeup with anything creative. They were working in avacuum."

"But I couldn't get the client to come upwith oragree on astrategy," Steve groaned.

"Steve, I'm going to turn your Needs Modelupside down on you here. Has United Bank evermounted a full-blown adcampaign before? Have theyeverworked with an adagency, letalone ouradagency,before? Are Roger and his reps advertising experts?"

Steve looked at Rhonda, to the Needs Model, andback to Rhonda as the realization hit him. He hadabandoned United Bank just as he'd felt Rhondahad abandoned him. They didn't have a clue how togive him a strategy.

No Excuses 1135

"Talk about the blind leading the blind," Steveconceded. "They were Enthusiastic Beginners at Dland now I'm sure they are Disillusioned Learners atD2 on the entire process. We need to give them HighDirection and High Support to get buy-in for thestrategy."

Steve pulled out his Palm Pilot. "Rhonda, I knowthat getting very specific with timelines and actionsteps isn't your favorite thing—you're a big-picturethinker—but it's what I need to make this work."

Rhonda smiled and pulled out her Palm Pilot.Together they made aplan for saving the client.

At Steve's signal, Tina slipped him the checkanda questioning look. She motioned, Thumbs-up orthumbs-down? Steve replied with an under-the-tabledouble thumbs-up. In a quiet voice he said, "Thanksfor your graciousness, and keep the change." He gaveherawink and agenerous overpayment ofthebill.

9

One Minute Magic

teve stood behindthe stage, speaking softly to theaudiovisual technician through his headset. He wasagain the coproducer ofthis year's advertising awardsprogram. The master of ceremonies announced thenext category: Best of Show for overall advertisingcampaign. As the five finalists were read, Steve peekedout at the audience. Rhonda and Grant were sittingin the third row with Roger from United Bank. Stevehoped they wouldn't betoo disappointed.

The MC opened the envelope. "The winner is"—he paused—"Irma's Eatery!" Awhoop went up fromthe crowd as the names of the creative team and adagency wereannounced.

Stevewatched Rhonda reach over and give Rogera consoling patonthe arm. Just wait, he thought.

One Minute Magic 1137

The MC handed out the triangular-shaped crystaltrophies and waited for the applause to wind downbefore making thenext announcement. "This year thepanel of judges added a new category—the Judges'Award for Best of Show among new advertisers. Andthat award goes to—United Bank!"

Steve watched Roger jump up from his seat andgrab Grant by theshoulders. Steve laughed outloud atseeing thestaid bank president so animated. Roger hadturnedout tobe anideal client. As the MC recognizedCreativeAdvertising and the United Bankteam: Peterfor artdirection, Alexa for copywriting, Maril for mediabuying, Jude for production, Grant as junior accountexecutive, and Steve as account executive. The proud-mama look onRhonda's face was priceless. Steve foundhimselfhappierforthe others than forhimself.

1381 One Minute Magic

The nine months since Rhonda and Steve met at

Irma's Eatery had been intense. It was only fittingthat the restaurant chainshouldwin the big awardandthat Creative Advertising should win the surpriseaward of the evening. Steve was grateful to Rhondaand his team, but also to his two best collaboratorsfor success—Blair and Cayla. Blair had grown fromgirlfriend to wife and from beginning runner tofledgling marathoner, trusting the Needs Model tohelp her master long-distance running and their newmarriage. Steve continued to be mentored by Cayla,though not as frequently as in the beginning. Steve felta pang of sadness—there was no Cayla sighting thisnight. He had become used to his favorite magicianpopping up at the strangest yet most appropriatetimes.

Steve tied up loose ends backstage, thanked theMC for a job well done, and joined the small groupof people still chatting in the lobby. They broke intoapplause as he walked in. There were bear hugs andpats on the back from coworkers, colleagues, friends,and of course, Blair. Suddenly Steve felt a tug at hisarm. It was Rhonda.

Pulling him aside, she cupped her hand over hisear and whispered, "Meet me in my office first thingMonday morning." She winked andwas off.


On Monday, Steve greeted Phyllis—who was nowhissecretary as well as Rhonda's. "The boss wants to seeme. Any idea why?"

Smiling her Mona Lisa smile, Phyllis refused todivulge anything.

Hearing Steve's voice, Rhonda came out to usherhim into her office. "Steve," she said as she shut thedoor, "I ran an idea past Roger, and he's in agreementpending your input. I want topull you offUnited Bankand promote Grant to account executive."

Steve didn't respond, hoping there was more tothe story. Rhonda took it as a sign to continue. "Iwant to promote you to head of the new businessdevelopment department. Ifwelandan account that isespecially attractive toyou, you have the option to takeit on as an account executive. What do you think?"

Steve processed the news for a moment beforesaying, "The idea intrigues me. My concern is that I'dleave a position where I'm at the D4—High Achieverstage on most of mygoals for a position where I'm atthe Dl—Enthusiastic Beginner stage onalmost everygoal. It's not only a new position for me, but for theagency."


"That's why we want you," Rhonda saidemphatically. "The role needs someone who will shapeit. Someone whowill challenge the assumed constraintthat It's never been done before.' Someone who will

celebrate points of power to draw upon resourcessuch as meandmy partners who have beenresponsiblefor new business since we started the company.Someone who knows how to collaborate for success

to get the direction and support needed to succeedin the role."

Steve was flattered—especially after Rhondaalluded to salary and benefit increases. Still—notmotivated by money, power, or status and never oneto make snap decisions, Steve told Rhonda he'd giveher an answerthe nextday.

Steve would talk it over with Blair. But he also felt

honor-bound to share the decision with his mentor.

Steve parked directly in front of Cayla's Cafe. It hadbeen weeks since he'd had a chance to visit her and

sip a mocha. The familiar door chime announcedhis arrival. He checked out "their" table, and to hissurprise, saw Cayla sitting with a jovial-looking fellowwho seemed somehow vaguely familiar. When Caylaspotted Steve, she smiled and waved.


"Come here!" she called. "I have someone I'd like

you to meet."Steve walked over and extended his hand to the

familiar stranger. "Hi, I'm Steve," he said.The man gave Steve an earnest handshake.

"Pleasedto meet you, Steve. I'm—""The one-and-only One Minute Manager!" Cayla

chimed in. "This is the guy who taught me everythingI know about the magic ofselfleadership."

Steve's face lit up. "Wow! It's great to meet you,"he said. "I can't tell you how much your teaching haschanged mylife for the better."

The One Minute Manager smiled humbly. "I feelas though I know you. Cayla has told me all aboutyou.You shouldfeelveryproud."

Steve smiled. "When I tell her the latest goodnews, Cayla's the onewho'll feel proud. I also need heradvice about an offermyboss made me. But wait, I'minterrupting you. I'll be gladto come back later."

"Ha!" the One Minute Manager let out a heartylaugh. "Howcan you refuse him, Cayla? He used theT need' phrase."

Cayla laughed and signaled Steve to sit down.Steve told them about United Bank's win at the ad

awards program and his pride for his team's success.Thenhe outlined his new jobopportunity.


"Congratulations, Steve." Cayla turned to the OneMinute Managerand said, "I guess it'stime."

"Time forwhat?" Steve asked apprehensively."To let yougo," Cayla responded.Steve looked to her, then to the One Minute

Manager, for an explanation."Steve," he said, "the beauty of developing a self

leaderis that it ultimately frees managers to focus theirattention where it's most needed. Cayla's job was toteach you how to be a self leader. She accomplishedher goal. It's time she turned her attention to otherswho need her."

"But I'm not at the High Achiever level oneverything. I still need direction and support," Steveprotested.

"You may not be at the High Achiever level onmany of the goals and tasks required in your new jobopportunity," the One Minute Manager said firmly,"butyou've masteredthe three tricks ofselfleadership:

a

SelfLeaders:

Challenge Assumed Constraints,

Celebrate Their Points ofPower,

And Collaborate For Success.

144 I One Minute Magic

"Just continue to practice the tricks and you'llmanage yourself to success. There are other would-beselfleaders who needCayla now," he said.

Thecafe door burst open and a gaggle ofchildrenrushed in, heading straight for Cayla's Magic Corner.

"Uh-oh!" Cayla said as shejumpedfrom her chair."Showtime!"

"Cayla," Steve said as he grabbed her elbow,"before you go, how can I thank you? How can I everrepayyouforyourhelp?"

"Just be yourself," Cayla responded.Before Steve could say more, Cayla was in front

of the eager children, perched on her stool, lookingintently at each one of them as she gained theirattention. In her rich voice she said, "My name isCayla, and I ama magician."

When the applause subsided, Cayla glanced atSteve as she asked the spellbound children, "Do youbelieve in magic?"

Steve smiled. What do you know—I do believein magic, he thought. At that moment, he felt a tapon his shoulder.

"Good on you!" the One Minute Managerwhispered intohis ear. "You'll make a fine magician."

"What doyou mean?" Steve whispered back.


The One Minute Manager simply pointed to aforlorn-looking woman sitting alone at a table. Withher faraway stare, she looked as Steve must havelookedwhen he first met Cayla.

The One Minute Manager winked and rose fromhis seat,headingfor the exit.

As he watchedthe One MinuteManagerdisappearthrough the door, Steve suddenly knew how hewould thank Cayla. He wouldn't do it by repayingher directly. He would thank her by carrying on thelegacy ofthe One Minute Manager. He would:

*

Teach Others

The Magic

OfSelfLeadership

#

THE END

Appendix

The Business Card Trick

Can you cut a hole from a business card large enoughto stick your head through? This trick demonstratesthe power of challenging assumed constraints. Tomaster it, follow these four steps:

1. Take a business card and fold it in half lengthwise.Startingfrom the foldededge, cut a series of slits one-quarter inch apart to within about one-half inch of theopposite side.

2. Turn the card completely around so that the openedges are facing you. Between the slits, cut more slitsgoing in the opposite direction, stopping about one-half inch from the opposite end of the card.

148 / Appendix

3. Slip the scissors into the fold starting after the firstslit. Cut along the folded edge, stopping at the lastslit,being careful to leave one-quarter inch of the foldintact at each end.

2^_

nc£4. Carefully unfold the card, pulling the slits apart aswide as theywill go, and slip the paper ring over yourhead.

Acknowledgments

We would like to thank the people who have broughttheir own special magic to this book: MarthaLawrence, who helped shape not only this book butour hearts aswell; Maril Adrian, whoshepherded Situational Self Leadership and the EDGE to theirsuccess; Linda Taylor, who shared her expertise oflearning and accelerated learning theory; LindaHulst, Patrice DeVeau Simpson, and CharleneAbies, who took personal interest—not just professional interest—in improving the quality of this book;clients and colleagues who took time from their busylives to provide feedback and support, especially TheMarmaxx Group and Nancy Maher; Jim Martinof Dow Chemical; Humberto Medina, TrevorKeighly, Victoria Cutler, Carla de Bose, JasonArnold, Richard Andrews, Debra Talbert, andMark Manning ofThe KenBlanchard Companies; allthe good folks at the Skaneateles Country Club, whogave us feedback; and our brilliant editor at WilliamMorrow, Henry Ferris.

Susan: I would like to personally thank: KennyTaylor, who teaches wisdom through the martial artsand self leadership through application; PeterTurner, who taught me to take magic seriously; Bill

150 / Acknowledgments

Brown, who opened my eyes to things unseen;Aubrey Keen, who has partnered with me in my ongoing search for self-knowledge; Kip Woodring, forhissupportovermany years, hismotorcycling wisdom,and hisclassic parts-salesman song.

We allwish to thankour partners. Ken thanks hiswife, Margie, who has been an inspiration and learning partner for over forty years. Susan thanks DreaZigarmi, her mentor and life partner, whose passionabout leadership is exceeded only by his passion forgood thinking; Laurence thanks Laurie OzanneHawkins, who hasbeen part ofthe Blanchard journeyall the way

About the Authors

Few people have made a more positive and lasting impact on the day-to-day management of people andcompanies as Ken Blanchard. He is the author orcoauthor of several bestselling books, including theblockbuster international bestseller The One MinuteManager and thegiant business bestsellers Leadershipand the One Minute Manager, Raving Fans, and GungHo! His books have combined sales of more than fifteen million copies in more than twenty-five languages. Ken is the chief spiritual officer of The KenBlanchard Companies, a worldwide human resourcedevelopment company. He is also cofounder of theLead Like Jesus Ministries, a nonprofit organizationdedicated toinspiring and equipping people tobeservant leaders in the marketplace. Ken and his wife,Margie, live in San Diego and work with their son,Scott, daughter, Debbie, and Debbie's husband, Hum-berto Medina.

Susan Fowler has been a consulting partner withthe Ken Blanchard Companies since 1990. With KenBlanchard and Laurence Hawkins she created—andis the lead developer of—Situational Self Leadership, considered the best-of-class self leadership and

152 I About the Authors

personal empowerment program in the world today.During her twenty-five-year career she has writtenfour popular guidebooks: Overcoming Procrastination; Mentoring: How to Cultivate the Most Important Relationship of Your Career; The Team LeadersIdea-a-Day Guide: 250 Ways to Make Your Team MoreEffective Every Day ofthe Year (with Drea Zigarmi);and Empowerment: Achieving Peak PerformanceThrough SelfLeadership (with Ken Blanchard).

Susan is one of the foremost experts on personalempowerment, having spoken in all fifty states in theU.S. and more than twenty foreign countries. In 2002she received a lifetime achievement award for creative

instructional design from Thiagi's North AmericanSimulation and Games Association. She is cofounderof Leadership Legacies, LLC, a research group dedicated to the ongoing exploration of leadership practices and behaviors. She received her bachelor ofscience degree inbusiness from theUniversity ofColorado at Boulder and is currendy an adjunct professorfor the University ofSan Diego's Masters ofScience inExecutive Leadership degreeprogram.

Laurence Hawkins is an internationally renownedmanagement consultant and trainer and a dynamicmotivational speaker. Forthe past twenty years he hasworked with hundreds of organizations in the areas

About the Authors 1153

of leadership training, motivation, team building, andorganizational development.

His international experience has won him consulting and training contracts in South America, theFar East, and several European countries, includingSpain, Great Britain, Italy, Sweden, Holland,and Denmark. Domestically and internationally, he has earnedthe reputation of being a dedicated and well-versedprofessional who inspires positive results ina practicalmanner.

Laurie's client list includes a variety of industriesand suchcorporate giants as Lockheed Martin, AT&T,Johnson &Johnson, and Bristol-Myers Squibb, as wellas a number of schools, hospitals, restaurants, andstart-ups.

With Ken Blanchard and Susan Fowler, he coau-thored theSituational SelfLeadership program, whichfocuses on empowerment and taking initiative whenyou're not in charge.

Laurie received his bachelor's degree inAmericanhistory and literature from Williams College and hismastersand doctorate degrees inleadership and organizational behavior from the University of Massachusetts, Amherst.

Services Available

Self Leadership and the One Minute Manager completes the trilogy that started with Leadership and theOne Minute Manager, followed by The One MinuteManager Builds High Performing Teams. These threebooks describe the three leadership programs thathave played a major role in building The Ken Blanchard Companies. Our company is committed to helping people and organizations lead at a higher level.With a mission to unleash the power and potential ofpeople and organizationsforthe greatergood, we are aglobal leader in workplace learning, productivity, andleadership effectiveness. We believe that people arethe key to accomplishing strategic objectives. Our programs not only help people learn, but also ensure thatthey cross the bridge from learning todoing. We offerseminars andprovide in-depth consulting in the areasof leadership, teamwork, customer service, performance management, and organizational synergy. Tolearn more, visit the Web site at www.kenblanchard.com or browse the eStore at www.kenblanchard.com/estore.

1561 Services Available

The Ken Blanchard Companies125 State Place

Escondido,CA 92029800-728-6000 or 760-489-5005

Fax: 760-489-8407

THE KEN BLANCHARD COMPANIES

SITUATIONAL SELF LEADERSHIP MODEL

Goal/

Task/

Skill

D4 D3 D2 D1

High

Low

Low Directive

and

High SupportiveyBehaviorLet's Talk,D3 Decides

High / Moderate-High / Low-Some / LowCompetence ^Competence ( Competence ( Competence

High \ Variable \.Low \High.Commitment \Commitment \Commitment \Commitment j

High Directiveand

High SupportiveBehavior

Let's Talk,leader Decides

low Directive

and

Low SupportiveBehavior

High DirectiveandLow SupportiveBehavior

DIRECTIVE BEHAVIOR -•High

Copyright © 2005 The Ken Blanchard Companies. AllRights Reserved.Do Not Duplicate. For individual copies of the Color Model please contactThe Ken Blanchard Companies at www.Kenblanchard.com or phone us at800-728-6000.

Ultimately, If s InYour Own Best Interest

To Accept ResponsibilityFor Getting What You Need

To Succeed In The Workplace.

•

Ken Blanchard, Ph.D., is a prominent, gregarious,

sought-after author, speaker, and business guru.He is characterized by friends, colleagues, andclients as one of the most insightful, powerful, andpassionate leaders in business today. Blanchard'simpact as a writer is far reaching. His perennial bestsellers include Raving Fans and WhaleDone! He is the Chief Spiritual Officer of The KenBlanchard Companies, a full-service global management training and consulting company that heand his wife, Dr. Marjorie Blanchard, founded in1979 in San Diego. He is also a cofounder of LeadLike Jesus, a nonprofit organization committedto inspiring and equipping people to be servantleaders in the marketplace.

Susan Fowler is one of the world's foremost

experts on personal empowerment and hasspoken on the subject in all fifty of the UnitedStates and more than twenty foreign countries.With Ken Blanchard and Laurence Hawkins she

created—and is the lead developer of—SituationalSelf Leadership®, which focuses on empowerment and taking the initiative when you're notin charge. She is an adjunct professor for theUniversity of San Diego's masters of science inexecutive leadership program.

Laurence Hawkins is an internationally renownedmanagement consultant, motivational speaker,and—with Ken Blanchard and Susan Fowler—

the coauthor of the Situational Self Leadershipprogram. Hawkins received his bachelor's degreein American history and literature from WilliamsCollege and his master's and doctoral degrees inleadership and organizational behavior from theUniversity of Massachusetts, Amherst.

To receive notice of author events and new books

by Ken Blanchard, sign up at www.authortracker.com.

Jacket design by Barbara Levine

WILLIAM MORROW

An Imprint ofHarperCollinsftfWisim

www.harpercollins.com

www.kenblanchard.com

SelfLeadership

MinuteManager

Discover the magic of no excuses!° It's fast. It's simple. It works!The book that reveals the three

easy-to-use tricks that willMAKE YOU MORE EFFECTIVE!

Praise for Ken Blanchard

"Few people have been as influential a leader as author,thinker and guru Ken Blanchard . . .

one of the top leadership authorities of the century."—American Management Association

Praise for Situational Self Leadership®

"A must-do course for those who want to further

their goals. The insights are easy to grasp and apply,yet amazingly transformative."

—John P. Glynn Jr.,

Sales Training Manager, Procter & Gamble

Thousands of people around the world are benefiting fromSituational Self Leadership, including men and women from:

Pfizer • T.J. Maxx • Marshalls • Procter & Gamble

• Host Marriott • BMW • American Express • Johnson & Johnson• Toyota • and many other top organizations

ISBN-13: 978-0-06-079912-0ISBN-10: 0-06-079912-9

5 1995

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