kids here comes the pun: 315 jokes for

31
8/24/2021 Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for Kids read://https_redtri.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fredtri.com%2Fbest-jokes-for-kids%2F 1/31 You love (groan) dad jokes and you actually love mom jokes, but kids are natural comedians! Why not encourage them to get punny with these kid-approved quips that require little to no explanation from parents? Whether it’s a joke a day for the kids, lunchbox jokes for every day or clean jokes to tell to kids, don’t be surprised when the comedy sketch goes beyond today! Scroll down for corny jokes and silly jokes, many of which have been sent to us by kid-readers (like you!). photo: khamkhor via Pixabay 1. What do you call an ant who fights crime? A vigilante! —Joe L., age 10 2. What is fast, loud and crunchy? A rocket chip! 3. Why did the teddy bear say no to dessert? Because she was stuffed. 4. What has ears but cannot hear? A cornfield. Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for Kids

Upload: others

Post on 11-May-2022

1 views

Category:

Documents


0 download

TRANSCRIPT

Page 1: Kids Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for

8/24/2021 Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for Kids

read://https_redtri.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fredtri.com%2Fbest-jokes-for-kids%2F 1/31

You love (groan) dad jokes and you actually love mom jokes, but kids are naturalcomedians! Why not encourage them to get punny with these kid-approved quipsthat require little to no explanation from parents? Whether it’s a joke a day for thekids, lunchbox jokes for every day or clean jokes to tell to kids, don’t be surprisedwhen the comedy sketch goes beyond today! Scroll down for corny jokes andsilly jokes, many of which have been sent to us by kid-readers (like you!).

photo: khamkhor via Pixabay

1. What do you call an ant who fights crime?

A vigilante!

—Joe L., age 10

2. What is fast, loud and crunchy?

A rocket chip!

3. Why did the teddy bear say no to dessert?

Because she was stuffed.

4. What has ears but cannot hear?

A cornfield.

Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes forKids

Page 2: Kids Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for

8/24/2021 Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for Kids

read://https_redtri.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fredtri.com%2Fbest-jokes-for-kids%2F 2/31

5. What did the left eye say to the right eye?

Between us, something smells!

6. Why did the police play baseball?

He wanted to get a catch!—Yuna, age 8

7. What did the microwave say to the other microwave?

Is it just me? Or is it really hot in here?—Yuna, age 8

8. Why did the student eat his homework?

Because the teacher told him it was a piece of cake!

9. When you look for something, why is it always in the last place you look?

Because when you find it, you stop looking.

10. What is brown, hairy and wears sunglasses?

A coconut on vacation.

photo: Tetbirt Salim via Unsplash

11. Two pickles fell out of a jar onto the floor. What did one say to the other?

Dill with it.

12. What did the Dalmatian say after lunch?

That hit the spot!

13. Why did the kid cross the playground?

To get to the other slide.

14. How does a vampire start a letter?

Tomb it may concern...

15. What do you call a droid that takes the long way around?

R2 detour.

16. How do you stop an astronaut’s baby from crying?

You rocket!

Page 3: Kids Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for

8/24/2021 Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for Kids

read://https_redtri.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fredtri.com%2Fbest-jokes-for-kids%2F 3/31

17. Why was 6 afraid of 7?

Because 7, 8, 9

18. What is a witch’s favorite subject in school?

Spelling!

19. When does a joke become a “dad” joke?

When the punchline is a parent.

20. How do you make a lemon drop?

Just let it fall.

21. What did the limestone say to the geologist?

Don’t take me for granite!

22. What do you call a duck that gets all A’s?

A wise quacker.

23. Why does a seagull fly over the sea?

Because if it flew over the bay, it would be a baygull.

24. What kind of water cannot freeze?

Hot water.

25. What kind of tree fits in your hand?

A palm tree!

26. Why did the cookie go to the hospital?

Because he felt crummy.

27. Why was the baby strawberry crying?

Because her parents were in a jam.

28. What did the little corn say to the mama corn?

Where is pop corn?

29. What is worse than raining cats and dogs?

Hailing taxis!

30. How much does it cost a pirate to get his ears pierced?

Page 4: Kids Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for

8/24/2021 Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for Kids

read://https_redtri.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fredtri.com%2Fbest-jokes-for-kids%2F 4/31

About a buck an ear.

31. Where would you find an elephant?

The same place you lost her!

32. How do you talk to a giant?

Use big words!

33. What animal is always at a baseball game?

A bat.

34. What falls in winter but never gets hurt?

Snow!

35. What do you call a ghost’s true love?

His ghoul-friend.

photo: Jose Ibarra via Unsplash

36. What building in New York has the most stories?

The public library!

37. What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you!

38. How do we know that the ocean is friendly?

It waves!

39. What is a tornado’s favorite game to play?

Twister!

40. How does the moon cut his hair?

Eclipse it.

41. How do you get a squirrel to like you?

Act like a nut!

42. What do you call two birds in love?

Tweethearts!

43. How does a scientist freshen her breath?

Page 5: Kids Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for

8/24/2021 Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for Kids

read://https_redtri.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fredtri.com%2Fbest-jokes-for-kids%2F 5/31

With experi-mints!

44. How are false teeth like stars?

They come out at night!

45. How can you tell a vampire has a cold?

She starts coffin.

46. What’s worse than finding a worm in your apple?

Finding half a worm.

47. What is a computer's favorite snack?

Computer chips!! —reader Rebecca K.

48. Why don’t elephants chew gum?

They do, just not in public.

49. What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon

50. What did the banana say to the dog?

Nothing. Bananas can’t talk.

51. What time is it when the clock strikes 13?

Time to get a new clock.

52. How does a cucumber become a pickle?

It goes through a jarring experience.

53. What do you call a boomerang that won’t come back?

A stick.

54. What do you think of that new diner on the moon?

Food was good, but there really wasn’t much atmosphere.

55. Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

Because the chicken wasn’t born yet.

Page 6: Kids Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for

8/24/2021 Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for Kids

read://https_redtri.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fredtri.com%2Fbest-jokes-for-kids%2F 6/31

56. Why can’t Elsa have a balloon?

Because she will let it go.

57. How do you make an octopus laugh?

With ten-tickles!

58. How do you make a tissue dance?

You put a little boogie in it.

59. What's green and can fly?

Super Pickle!

60. Knock knock.

Who’s there?

Interrupting pirate.

Interrupting pir—yarrrrrr!

photo: Cherie J Photos via flickr

61. What did the nose say to the finger?

Quit picking on me!

62. What musical instrument is found in the bathroom?

A tuba toothpaste.

63. Why did the kid bring a ladder to school?

Because she wanted to go to high school.

64. Where do vampires keep their money?

A blood bank.

65. What do elves learn in school?

The elf-abet.

66. What do you call a dog magician?

A labracadabrador.

67. Where do pencils go on vacation?

Pencil-vania.

Page 7: Kids Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for

8/24/2021 Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for Kids

read://https_redtri.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fredtri.com%2Fbest-jokes-for-kids%2F 7/31

68. Why couldn't the pony sing a lullaby?

She was a little horse.

69. What do you cakes and baseball have in common?

They both need a batter!

70. What gets wetter the more it dries?

A towel.

71. What do you call two bananas?

Slippers.

And speaking of bananas...

72. Why did the banana go to the doctor?

Because it wasn’t peeling well.

73. What do you call a fake noodle?

An impasta.

74. What stays in the corner yet can travel all over the world?

A stamp.

75. How do you fix a cracked pumpkin?

With a pumpkin patch.

76. What kind of award did the dentist receive?

A little plaque.

77. What do you call a funny mountain?

Hill-arious.

78. Why are ghosts bad liars?

Because you can see right through them.

79. Why do bees have sticky hair?

Because they use a honeycomb.

80. What did the big flower say to the little flower?

Hi, bud!

Page 8: Kids Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for

8/24/2021 Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for Kids

read://https_redtri.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fredtri.com%2Fbest-jokes-for-kids%2F 8/31

81. There are two robots sitting on a wall. They are named Pete and Re-Pete.Pete falls off. Who is left?

(Re-Pete...so you repeat the whole thing again and again and again.)

—Henrik P., 10

photo: iStock

82. What is a pony’s favorite juice?

She really likes lemon-neigh’d.

—5-year-old Kerrigan

83. Where do fish keep their money?

In the River-Bank!

—Jaxon G., 7 y.o.

84. What do you call an alligator with a vest?

An investigator!

—Milo H-R, age 8

85. Why was the computer cold?

It left its window open!

—Milo H-R, age 8

86. Knock knock!

Who’s there?

Boo.

Boo who?

Don’t cry!

—Milo H-R, age 8

87. In baseball, would it take longer to run from 1st to 2nd base or 2nd to3rd base?

2nd to 3rd base because there’s a shortstop in between.

—Milo H-R, age 8

88. What has lots of leaves but never actually grew?

Page 9: Kids Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for

8/24/2021 Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for Kids

read://https_redtri.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fredtri.com%2Fbest-jokes-for-kids%2F 9/31

A book!

—Milo H-R, age 8

89. Why was the computer cold?

It had a virus.

—Henrik, age 10

90. Why did the invisible man turn down the job offer?Because he couldn’t see himself doing it.

—Jan L. 91. Who keeps the ocean clean?

The mer-maid.

—Jan L.

photo: Lars Plougmann via Flickr

92. What did the astronaut say when he crashed into the moon?

"I Apollo-gize."

93. Why didn’t the orange win the race?

It ran out of juice.

94. What dinosaur had the best vocabulary?

The thesaurus.

95. What did one DNA strand say to the other DNA strand?

Do these genes make my butt look big?

96. Why aren’t dogs good dancers?

They have two left feet.

97. What did the wolf say when it stubbed its toe?

Owwwww-ch! (by Henrik, age 5)

98. Kid: What are you doing under there?

Mom: Under where?

Kid: Ha ha! You said underwear!!

Page 10: Kids Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for

8/24/2021 Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for Kids

read://https_redtri.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fredtri.com%2Fbest-jokes-for-kids%2F 10/31

99. Why did Johnny throw the clock out of the window?

Because he wanted to see time fly.

100. What did one toilet say to the other?

You look flushed.

photo: Jolie Loeb

101. Why did the man put his money in the freezer?

He wanted cold hard cash!

102. Why couldn't the astronaut book a hotel on the moon?

Because it was full.

103. How do pickles enjoy a day out?

They relish it.

104. What do you call an old snowman?

Water.

105. What's a pirate's favorite letter?

Arrrrrrrrrr

106. What do you get when you cross an elephant with a fish?

Swimming trunks.

107. How do you throw a party in space?

You planet.

108. What did zero say to eight?

Nice belt!

109. What happened when the skunk was on trial?

The judge declared, "Odor in the court, odor in the court!"

110. What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer!

111. Why did the tomato blush?

It saw the salad dressing.

Page 11: Kids Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for

8/24/2021 Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for Kids

read://https_redtri.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fredtri.com%2Fbest-jokes-for-kids%2F 11/31

112. What do you call a fish without an eye?

A fsh.

113. What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup?

Anyone can roast beef.

114. What do you get when you cross a centipede with a parrot?

A walkie talkie.

115. Why are robots never afraid?

They have nerves of steel.

116. Why did the cabbage win the race?

Because it was a-head.

photo: iStock

117. What does an evil hen lay?

Deviled eggs.

118. What does a book do in the winter?

Puts on a jacket.

119. Knock knock!

Who's there?

Dishes.

Dishes who?

Dishes me, who are you?

120. What sound do you hear when a cow breaks the sound barrier?

Cowboom!

121. What kind of haircuts to bees get?

Buzzzzzcuts.

122. Knock knock!

Who's there?

Donut.

Page 12: Kids Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for

8/24/2021 Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for Kids

read://https_redtri.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fredtri.com%2Fbest-jokes-for-kids%2F 12/31

Donut who?

Donut ask me, I just got here.

124. What do you get if you cross a pie and a snake?

A pie-thon.

125. What do you do if you get peanut butter on your doorknob?

Use a door jam.

126. Why was 6 so mad at 7?

Because 7 8 9.

127. Why didn't the robot finish his breakfast?

Because the orange juice told him to concentrate.

128. Why can't you play hockey with pigs?

They always hog the puck.

129. Why do porcupines always win the game?

They have the most points.

130. Where do elephants pack their clothes?

In their trunks!

131. What does bread do on vacation?

Loaf around.

132. Why was the broom running late?

It over-swept.

photo: Glucosala via Pixabay

133. What part of the fish weighs the most?

The scales.

134. What do ghosts like to eat in the summer?

I Scream.

135. Why did the teacher wear sunglasses to school?

Because her students were so bright.

Page 13: Kids Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for

8/24/2021 Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for Kids

read://https_redtri.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fredtri.com%2Fbest-jokes-for-kids%2F 13/31

136. What do you call a deer with pink eye?

A colorful eye-deer. (credit to Capt. John of the Appledore!)

137, Where do sheep go on vacation?

The Baaa-hamas.

138. What does every birthday end with?

The letter Y.

139. What did the paper say to the pencil?

Write on!

140. Why do birds fly?

It's faster than walking.

141. Why did Superman flush the toilet?

Because it was his doody.

142. Why did the pillow cross the road?

It was picking up the chicken's feathers.

143. Can February March?

No, but April May.

144. What time do ducks wake up?

At the quack of dawn.

145. Why did the giraffes get bad grades?

She had her head in the clouds.

146. What did the flower say after it told a joke?

I was just pollen your leg.

147. What did the traffic light say to the truck?

Don't look, I'm changing.

148. What does a cloud wear?

Thunderwear!

149. Why didn't the koala bear get the job?

They said she was over-koala-fied.

Page 14: Kids Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for

8/24/2021 Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for Kids

read://https_redtri.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fredtri.com%2Fbest-jokes-for-kids%2F 14/31

150. Who was that owl who did all the tricks?

Who-dini.

151. What kind of vegetable is angry?

A steamed carrot!

photo: Amigos3D via Pixabay

152. How does the moon stay up in the sky?

Moonbeams!

153. Why isn't there a clock in the library?

Because it tocks too much.

154. Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees?

Because they're so good at it!

155. What day of the week are most twins born on?

Twos-day!

(submitted by reader Scooter T.!)

156. Would February March?

No, but April May.

157. What do you call bears with no ears?

B.

158. What kind of tree fits in your hand?

A palm tree!

168. What do you call a fly with no wings?

A walk.

—Jasper L., young reader submitted!

169. What’s yellow and looks like pineapple?

A lemon with a new haircut.

—submitted (and created) by Rafael L.

170. What do you call a deer with no eyes?"No eye-deer."

Page 15: Kids Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for

8/24/2021 Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for Kids

read://https_redtri.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fredtri.com%2Fbest-jokes-for-kids%2F 15/31

—also sent in by young Raffy

171. What did the lunchbox say to the banana?

You really have appeal. 172. What did the mouse say to the keyboard? You're my type!

173. What did the science book say to the math book?Wow, you've got problems.

174. How do squids get to school?

They take an octobus.

175. Where do mermaids look for jobs?The kelp-wanted section.

photo: iStock

176. What word starts with the letter t, ends with the letter t, and has t in it?

A teapot!

—young reader Collin S.

177. What has four wheels and flies?

A garbage truck!

—Lewis G.

178. Two goats were munching on a movie script.

Goat 1: This is good! Goat 2: The book was better.

—reader submitted by Mr. Jeffry

179. What do you call a monkey at the North Pole?

Lost.

—submitted by Stella D.

180. Why did Humpty Dumpty have a great fall?

Page 16: Kids Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for

8/24/2021 Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for Kids

read://https_redtri.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fredtri.com%2Fbest-jokes-for-kids%2F 16/31

To make up for his miserable summer.

—reader submitted by Kaci Y.

181. Why did the woman become an archeologist?

Because her career was in ruins.

182. Knock knock!

Who's there?

Manatee.

Manatee who?

Manatee would be better than a sweater today, it's hot!

183. What do you call two monkeys that share an Amazon account?

Primemates!

—Merci P., aged 10

184. What snack should you make for the Snowman Holiday Party?

Ice Krispy Treats

—Emmerson H., age 13

185. What do you call a nun who sleepwalks?

A roamin' Catholic.

—Janice B., a reader like you!

186. Why do birds fly south?

It's too far to walk.

—Pearl, age 10

photo: iStock

187. What did the traffic light say to the cars?

Don't look, I'm changing!

—reader, age 6

188. Why is there a gate around cemeteries?

Because people are dying to get in!

Page 17: Kids Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for

8/24/2021 Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for Kids

read://https_redtri.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fredtri.com%2Fbest-jokes-for-kids%2F 17/31

189. What is a scarecrow's favorite fruit?

A strawberry.

190. How does a hurricane see?

With one eye.

191. How do they answer the phone at the paint store?

Yellow!

—Lily, age 6

192. Why do scissors always win a race?

Because they take a shortcut!

—Foster, age 5

193. How do you stop a bull from charging? You unplug it!

—Jadyn, Age 12 194. What did the dad say to his daughter at the cook out? This grill is on fire!

—Jadyn, 12 (This kid is on fire! 🤣)

195. Why did the king go to the bathroom?

He wanted to sit on the throne.

—Eric, age 10 196. What is a pirate's favorite body part?

The booty!—C.J., age 9

197. If it takes two men to dig a hole in one day how long would it take forone man to dig a half a hole?

There is no such thing as a half a hole.—Eric, age 10

198. How do cats bake cake?From scratch.

Page 18: Kids Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for

8/24/2021 Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for Kids

read://https_redtri.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fredtri.com%2Fbest-jokes-for-kids%2F 18/31

—reader Jacey 199. What is a zombie's favorite thing to eat? Brain food.

200. How do you fix a broken tomato?With a can of tomato paste. 201. What do you call a rabbit with lice? Bugs Bunny.

photo: iStock

202. It took 10 workers 10 days to build a bridge. How long would it take 5workers to build the same bridge?

None—it’s already built!

—Liam, age 7

203. How do you make the word Tiger longer?

Ti-grrrh

—Kabir, Age 9

204. How do you clean chicken? -

Put it in dishwasher.

—Kabir, Age 9

205. What is brown and sticky?

A stick.

—young reader Kohen

206. There's a girl on a boat in a pretty pink coat. What's her name?

What.

—Ray, age 9

207. Where does a rat go when it has a toothache? To the rodentist.

Page 19: Kids Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for

8/24/2021 Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for Kids

read://https_redtri.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fredtri.com%2Fbest-jokes-for-kids%2F 19/31

—Ray, age 9!

208. What does an alien do when it is bored in school?Spaces out. —Ray! (they are on a roll!), age 9

209. What does a broken plate say when she gets her cupcake?

Is this GLUE-ten free?

—Guess who? Ray! age 9

210. Why didn't the hyena cross the road?

He was too busy laughing. —reader submitted by Gillian P.

211. Have you heard the one about the student who was afraid of negativenumbers?He'll stop at nothing to avoid them. 212. What do you call it when a hammock teases another hammock?

Hammockery! —Joe L., age 8

213. What did they say when Marie Curie and Albert Einstein said the samething at the same time?

Greatest minds think alike! —Henrik, age 9

214. What did the kid learn about knowledge?

It was all knowing.—Reader submitted by Deziree

215. Why did the chicken go the hospital?

Because it needed some tweatment!—Joshua Y., age 9

216. Why did the skeletons cross the road?

Page 20: Kids Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for

8/24/2021 Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for Kids

read://https_redtri.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fredtri.com%2Fbest-jokes-for-kids%2F 20/31

To get to the body shop!—Also Mr. Joshua Y., age 9

217. What is more impressive than a talking parrot?

A spelling bee.

—submitted by...drumroll...Joshua Y., age 9!!

218. What do you call babies in the army?

Infantry!

—Joe L., age 9

219. What is a cat's favorite color?Purrr-ple! —Olivia W., age 7

photo: Helena Lopes via Pexels

220. Why did the dragon cross the road?Because he was too chicken to fly! —Joshua Y.

221. Who won the race of princesses?

Rapunzel, By a hair!—Josh Y!

222. What did the egg say when it was late for breakfast?I have to scramble! —our buddy, Joshua Y.

223. How do you stop a bull from charging?

You take away it's credit card!

—Joshua Y.

224. Where does the T-rex go shopping?

The dino store!

Page 21: Kids Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for

8/24/2021 Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for Kids

read://https_redtri.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fredtri.com%2Fbest-jokes-for-kids%2F 21/31

—Joshua Y., age 9

225. Why was the rabbit happy?

Because somebunny loved him!

—Guess who? Joshua Y.!

226. What did the pear say to the shoeless?

You need a pair of shoes.

—reader submitted by Rose A.

227. What do you call a bear with no ear?

A "B"

—Alexis R. 228. What would happen if the dean lost his job?

He would lose his "ideanity."

—Joshua Y. 229. Why did the baby cross the road?

To get to the whine shop!

—Matilda C., age 7

230. Why shouldn’t you trust stairs?

Because they are always up to something.

—Ryder, Age 3!!!

photo: iStock

231. Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was out standing in his field.

—Suzanna R.

232. What do you call a cat burrito?

A purrito

—Rosewyn age 8 and 3 quarters

Page 22: Kids Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for

8/24/2021 Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for Kids

read://https_redtri.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fredtri.com%2Fbest-jokes-for-kids%2F 22/31

233. What kind of key opens a banana?

A monkey!

—Rosewyn age 8 and 3 quarters

234. What do you call a pounding headache? A temple tantrum!

—hilarious reader, MJ Sims

235. How do you get a cat to code?You Scratch it!

—Musegirl, 8

236. Why was the man mad at the clock?

He was ticked off!

—Nolan A. age 8

237. What is the strongest kind of shoe?

Under Armor!

—Liam A. age 9 238. Why did Rudolph have a bad report card?

Because he went down in History!—Sreeja K., age 8

239. Why don't scientists trust atoms?

Because they make up everything!

—Sreeja K., age 8

240. Why can't you spell dark with a "c", so it says "darc"?

Because you can't c in dark!—Shivani age 8

241. How do you clean a chicken?

An egg wash!

Page 23: Kids Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for

8/24/2021 Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for Kids

read://https_redtri.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fredtri.com%2Fbest-jokes-for-kids%2F 23/31

—MB, age 12

242. Why did the cookie have to go to the doctor?

It was feeling crummy.

243. What's Joanna Gaines' favorite snack food?

Chips

—H.P., aged 9

photo: Xavi Cabera via Unsplash

244. Why didn’t the skeleton cross the road?

Because there was noBody on the other side. —Grandpa Jo, 54

245. Why didn’t the skeleton cross the road?

He didn't have the guts. —Londynn, 9

246. What do you do when an astronaut’s wife is upset?

Give her some space.—Jaden, 11

247. Why did the young astronaut cry on the moon?

Because he missed his mother earth. —A mother on earth

248. Two monkeys were fighting over a banana. What happened?

Banana split!

—Saori K.

249. What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A blood orange!

—Rianna G., age 10

250. Why don't eggs like to gamble?

They always get a raw deal.

Page 24: Kids Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for

8/24/2021 Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for Kids

read://https_redtri.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fredtri.com%2Fbest-jokes-for-kids%2F 24/31

251. When is a door not a door?When it's ajar. 252. Why did the scientist take out the bell?

He wanted to win the no-bell prize.

—DT

253. Why are strawberries natural musicians?

They love to jam. 254. What is orange and sounds like a parrot?

A carrot!

photo: iStock

255. Did you hear about the kid who drank eight sodas?

He burped 7-Up.

256. What be the pirate's favorite letter of the alphabet?

Arrrr!

No, it be the C! (Sea).

—A hilarious 6-year-old reader.

257. What is a tree's favorite beverage?

Root beer!

258. Why do fish live in saltwater?

Pepper makes them sneeze! ACHOOOOOO!!!!!!

—Hasset A.

259. Why are fish so smart?

Because they live in a school!

—Ronit P.

The following four jokes were written by Kaleb, age 4, as told to his grandpa:

260. Why did the cow lie down in the grass?

Page 25: Kids Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for

8/24/2021 Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for Kids

read://https_redtri.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fredtri.com%2Fbest-jokes-for-kids%2F 25/31

He was ground beef.

261. What did Mama cow say to Baby cow?

It’s pasture bedtime.

262. Why did the phone walk in the water?

He was wading for a phone call.

263. What is blue, but not heavy?

Light blue.

264. How do you find Will Smith in the snow?

You look for fresh prints.

—Joshua N.

265. Why don't you ever date a tennis player?

Because love means nothing to them.

—Joshua N.

266. "Doctor, doctor I am afraid of squirrels!"

Doctor: You must be nuts.

—reader Jerry C.

267. What happened to the frog whose car broke down?

He had to be toad!

—Martin F.

268. What is the best day to visit McDonalds?

Fry-Day!

—Gianni, age 6

269. What's a cow's favorite drink?

A s-moooo-thie.

—Young readers Jax (7) and Kora (5)

270. Knock knock!

Who’s there?

Cow

Page 26: Kids Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for

8/24/2021 Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for Kids

read://https_redtri.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fredtri.com%2Fbest-jokes-for-kids%2F 26/31

Cow who?

Cows don’t say who, they say moooo!

—Adalyn, age 5

271. Why did the tomato stop?

Because he was out of juice.

—Karma E.

photo: Picsea on Unsplash

272. What are cats best at?

Cat-apulting!

—Macy (10)

273. Where do cats roam?

In the catacombs!

—Katie (34)

274. What kind of stick does a cat chase?

A cat-stick!

—Macy (10)

275. What kind of fruit does a dog eat?

A dog-berry!

—Macy(10) & Katie (34)

276. Why do hockey players make great bankers?

Because they are good at checking.

—Henrik, age 9 3/4

277. How do chickens dance?

Chick to chick.

278. Mr. Red and Ms. Red live in the red house; Mr. Purple and Ms. Purplelive in the purple house. Who lives in the white house?

The president!

Page 27: Kids Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for

8/24/2021 Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for Kids

read://https_redtri.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fredtri.com%2Fbest-jokes-for-kids%2F 27/31

—submitted by young reader Gwen I.

279. Why did the chicken cross the road?

It was trying to get away from the KFC.

—Ben, age 8

280. Who sits at the bottom of the sea and twitches?

A nervous wreck.

—Alesha, age 11

281. Why was the snowman in the box?Because he was picking his nose. —Peter, age 8

photo: iStock

These next five were sent in from Jax (7) and Kora (5):

282. What’s a dog's favorite toy? A funny bone!

283. What’s a cow's favorite rock? A mooo-n rock

284. What’s the scariest plant? Bam-booo!

285. What’s a cow's favorite place to go? The mooo-vies!

286. What’s the scariest injury? A booo-booo!

(Jax & Kora!)

287. Why was the snow yellow? Because Elsa let it go!

—Kaylee

289. Why did the girl smear peanut butter on the road? To go with the traffic jam!

—Scarlett

290. What do you call a dinosaur that is sleeping? A dino-snore!

Page 28: Kids Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for

8/24/2021 Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for Kids

read://https_redtri.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fredtri.com%2Fbest-jokes-for-kids%2F 28/31

291. What do you get when you cross a vampire and a snowman? Frost bite!

292. What did one plate say to the other plate? Dinner is on me!

293. What do you call Chewbacca with cookies in its fur? A chocolate-chip Wookie.

—Jake

294. What is black and white and looks like a penguin? A penguin.

—Zhan, age 5

295. What does a cow like to drink? A smoothie.

—Carolina, age 8

296. Why did the parent hit the cake with a hammer? It was a pound cake.

photo: iStock

297. When is the best time to go to the dentist? At tooth-hurty!!!

—Tyler R.

298. Why is "dark" spelled with a k and not a c? Because you can’t c in the dark!

—Garrett

299. A new pig came to the farm, he was a great painter. What do you thinkhis name was? Pigasso!

—Amara

A spin-off:

300. What is the name of the Dutch pig who was famous for paintingsunflowers and cutting off his ear?Vincent van Hog

—Gloria, age 8

301. What is a bat’s favourite game to play? A com-bat

Page 29: Kids Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for

8/24/2021 Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for Kids

read://https_redtri.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fredtri.com%2Fbest-jokes-for-kids%2F 29/31

—Bianca, age 7

302. What did the salad say to the carrot after it lost the fight? You've lettuce down.

—Joe, age 10

303. What did the salad say to the carrot when it asked for directions to arestaurant? Beets me!

—Joe, age 10

304. Why don't eggs tell each other jokes? They'd crack each other up!

—Raina, age 10

305. Which milkshake always comes with a straw?A strawberry milkshake

—Gloria, age 8

306. What stories do crustaceans like best? Lobster Tales

—Gloria, age 8

307. What did the basketball say to the hoop when it missed? Oh shoot!

—Layla, age 9

308. Why did the lion cross the road? To get to the other pride!

309. What is the best gift you could ever ask for? Broken drum sticks. You just can't beat it.

—Nate

310. Why did the nurse have a red crayon? To draw blood.

—Charlotte

311. What mood best describes a sad librarian? Under the books.

—Elliana

photo: istock

Page 30: Kids Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for

8/24/2021 Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for Kids

read://https_redtri.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fredtri.com%2Fbest-jokes-for-kids%2F 30/31

312. What do you call a Buffalo that likes beef? A Beef-alo

313. What does a camel say to a hunter? Do you need some camel-flage

314. Why does the dinosaur like the bathroom? Because it’s ex-stink-t

315. Why does the dentist use a computer? Because it has Bluetooth.

—Jokes 312-315 by Gunner, age 8

Got a joke you’d like to add? Send it to [email protected] andwe’ll put it in the story!

featured image: Tetbir Salim via Unsplash

—Amber Guetebier with Wendy Guetebier, Dina Petterson, Henrik Pelto, AlixBenedict, Kevin Cabral, Erin Lem, Laura Green and readers like you!

RELATED STORIES

44 Clean Jokes for Kids, by Kids!

Riddle Me This: 19 Amazing Riddles for Kids

23 Super Silly Birthday Jokes for Kids

63 Fascinating Facts Every Kid Should Know

20 Valentine’s Jokes Kids Will Love

Underwear Jokes That Are Mostly Clean

Spook-tacular Halloween Jokes

9 Pickle Jokes to Make Them Giggle

Ho-Ho-Holiday Jokes That Will Crack Them Up

National Taco Day Jokes You’ll Be Taco-Bouting All Day

20 Cheesy Jokes to Make Anyone Crack a Smile

5 Hilarious Jokes About Parenting

Red Tricycle’s Best April Fool’s Jokesdo

Page 31: Kids Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for

8/24/2021 Here Comes the Pun: 315 Jokes for Kids

read://https_redtri.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fredtri.com%2Fbest-jokes-for-kids%2F 31/31