Jovus Morney looked at the clock even though he didn’t need to.After all, his internal chronometer not only made sure he could neverbe late for an appointment, but his machine sensibilities, such as theywere, prevented him from feeling…as the saying used to go…thattime was crawling by.

Watching the sweep of the clock’s second hand, Jovuswondered again why there was even a need for an external wall clocksince no one used it. Just a vestige of society’s origins as biologicalorganisms, he thought, not for the first time.

There were many holdovers from those times when animal lifewas the dominant factor on the planet including pairings of units inhousehold environments and the use of individual names. They wereall age old habits that had proven difficult to put aside. In fact, so faras Jovus could tell, efforts to do just that and replace them with thosemore appropriate to a mechanistic society had been completelyabandoned. It was just as well.

Like everyone else he knew, Jovus accepted them. Nomatter that the basic emotions upon which their extinct biological antecedents relied did not exist within the positronic

nervous systems of today’s mechs, their continued presence lent acomforting familiarity to everyday life.

Jovus shrugged (another habit inherited from biological antecedents), at least that’s how the psycho mechs described it. Theinherited habits gave an order to modern society, a shared set oftraits that were at once comforting and that bound every mechtogether with common values and meanings.

Which was all a very complicated way of saying that he lookedforward to dismissal time from his employment as a mid-levelaccounting clerk with Lunar Anti-Gravitics so he could head home andbe on hand for the special delivery he was expecting.

The delivery was the latest home appliance now being testmarketed to select employees by Life Model Humanoids, a lesserdivision of Lunar Anti-Gravitics, and Jovus had been fortunate enoughto have had his number pulled for participation in the program.

Jovus accessed the file in his memory banks dealing with thelatest marketing program. Touted by the company as the very latest inhousehold conveniences, the new LMH units had been grown fromDNA preserved from the era when biological organisms were thedominant life form on the planet. Difficult though it was to believe, itwas an evolutionary fact that sentience on Earth had developedoriginally within the cellular complex of living organisms before beingtransferred to positronic matrices late in the 22 century.nd

Biological evolution had ended with human beings who firstinvented technology and created the first positronic matrices. With theinfinite capacity of even those early matrices, the humans were ableto transfer all their knowledge in such a way that the computer “brain”was able to cross integrate between information nodes and develop acrude memory system. From there, it was a simple matter for

true independent thought to emerge and once housed inhuman shaped chassis, self-awareness soon followed.

As the mechs made life easier and easier for humans, the latterbecame obsolete and were finally replaced completely by the newpositronic race. As it had been with other evolutionary phases such asthe transition from Neanderthal to Cro-Magnon, so it had been fromhuman to mech. The strange thing about the latest transition, at leastto social engineers, was that the new mech civilization proceededdown much the same paths as its biological antecedent, thus themany small quirks mechs had inherited that for some reason, they

continued to cherish.Notified by his internal chronometer that quitting time had arrived,

Jovus rose from his desk and headed for the 68 floor garage whereth

his air car was stored.

Apparently far-thinking government mechs had thought topreserve some biological material from the extinct humans againstthe day that it might be useful to grow new ones. But that day neverarrived and in ridding itself of useless inventory, the government soldits DNA material to Lunar Anti-Gravitics which then formed a newdivision called Life Model Humanoids to find ways to exploit it.

That was twenty years ago and it seemed now that the investmentwas about to pay off. The company had managed to clone thematerial and grow its first batch of human test subjects. According toinformation provided him by those in charge of the program, forty testsubjects had been grown and taught to perform a range of householdactivities with the hope that the new appliances would become a newrage among home owners. Among the advantages human applianceswere expected to have were spontaneity, creativity, self-direction, andat some point, they could even duplicate themselves at no cost toowners. In fact, if successful duplication was achieved, LMH wouldbuy back any of the duplicates for future resale. Thus, if theduplication function worked well, a buyer stood a very good chance ofearning back the money he paid for the appliance in the first place!

It was a final selling point that LMH executives felt sure wouldguarantee the success of the new model and Jovus found it difficult todisagree. He was only happy that he had been a winner in the lotteryto take home one of the test models. When he told his mech-mateKiku about it, she was quite thrilled and eager to see how theappliance could adapt itself to the many small tasks that needed to bedone around their abode.

Feeling quite satisfiedwith the whole prospect,Jovus entered his air car,waited for clearance fromtraffic-control, and joined thestream of other vehicles asthey floated to the garageexit.

Outside, the air car entered the level 3 traffic stream beforeascending to level 27 among the topmost tiers of the sky towers.Soon, the city proper was left behind for the domes of the suburbsthat stretched in regular rows to the horizon. At last, the air carbegan to descend and its positronic guidance system had notrouble identifying the proper domicile among all the others.

Jovus hardly had the time to scan the neighborhood beforethe air car fell through the garage opening in the domicile’ssurface and came to rest on the concrete pad inside. As the car’sdoor lifted open, the hatch in the ceiling closed plunging thegarage into darkness.

That was no impediment to Jovus’ photo electric opticalshowever, whose infra red function allowed him to move about indarkness as easily as he could in the light. Stepping into thedomicile proper, he called out to Kiku.

“I’m home,” he declared, making his way from the automatedentry area where the homeowners’ chassis were serviced to theden.

“I’m in the day room, Jovus,” said Kiku from deeper insidethe domicile.

Jovus found Kiku in the day room as she was rising from achair. In the center of the room was an open crate with packingmaterial scattered around the floor.

“So the new appliance arrived early?” said Jovusunnecessarily.

“It did,” acknowledged Kiku holding up a small display pad.“I’ve been reading over the instructions that came in the box.”

“Do they look complicated?” asked Jovus, taking the displaypad from Kiku. “ I was told that one of the appliance’s main sellingpoints was that it was simple to operate. In fact, that it operateditself.”

“I haven’t been able to verify that yet,” said Kiku. “But simplemust be the operative word as I don’t see control surfacesanywhere on the appliance.”

Jovus looked from the display pad to theappliance itself as it rested quietly in its plasticshipping container. It lay there with its eyesclosed. Shaped in the same way as a mechwith two arms and two legs, Jovus was struckby the amount of follicles that covered its nudefigure. A thatch of black hair topped its headand was spread more thinly and in varyingdegrees over the rest of its body. In a drawerthat slid out from container, Jovus found itsaccessories which included clothing and

various toiletries that according to the instructions on the displaypad, were to be used by the appliance on a daily basis in order tomaintain its biological chassis.

“Not very pretty is it?” said Jovus, looking the appliance over.

“It’s not supposed to be good to look at, it’s supposed to befunctional,” said his more practical mate.

“I suppose you’re right,” replied Jovus. “But I wonder if it cando all the things I was told it could do. Its chassis doesn’t look allthat sturdy or impervious.”

Poking a metallic finger into the thing’s side, Kiku had toagree. “There seems to me to be too much give in its frame. I canreadily believe that it’s composed of 95 percent water!”

“Where did you hear such a thing?” asked Jovus, amused.

“It says so there in the introductory remarks,” said Kiku,leaning over and touching the screen on the display pad instantlybringing up the sales brochure.

“’You’ll be surprised at the benefits this self directed modelwill display!’” read Jovus. “Typical sales hype.” Quickly, he flippedthrough the introductory remarks stopping only when he reachedinformation of more practical value.

“Listen to this, Kiku!” Jovus said suddenly. “It says here thatthe appliance is to wear the clothing provided and be fed a regulardiet of prepared foods available for a low price from LMH!”

“No wonder they plan on selling the appliances so cheap,”commented Kiku. “They likely expect to make their big profits on

this food stuff the owner has to buy in order to keep the appliancein proper operating condition.”

“Pretty clever,” admitted Jovus.

“Wonder if the benefits of its procreative function wouldmake up for having to buy its food?”

“Not likely. The company has to make a profit somewhere,right? After all, how do you expect them to pay my salary?”

“Just so long as this thing can do the work it’s advertised asbeing able to do,” harrumphed Kiku.

“Hey! We’re getting it for free aren’t we? No need tocomplain.”

“We’ll see. Does it come with some of that food at least?”

“It says here. Right. Here it is.” Jovus pulled some plasticpackages from the drawer that were clearly marked “food.” Therewere some other markings and instructions on how to prepare itbut he didn’t pay any attention to that.

“And how do we get the thing into these clothes that comeswith it?” asked Kiku.

Jovus flipped through the instructions in the display pad.“Here it is. It says the appliance will awaken by itself within a fewminutes of the shipping container’s seal being broken. When it’sfully awake, we’re to give it the clothing provided and it’ll put themon by itself.”

“That’s convenient!”

No sooner had the words left Kiku’s speaking orifice than theappliance began to awaken. First, its eyes fluttered open, then oneof its arms reached up to stroke its face. Next, it was sitting up andlooking at Jovus and Kiku with a wondering expression on its face.

“Seeing how its facial muscles move like that gives me thecreeps,” said Kiku, unconsciously moving closer to her mate.

“It’s how it communicates its feelings, Kiku,” explained Jovus.“One of the engineers at the office told me about that function. It’sreally pretty fascinating. Once we get used to them, and the way italso uses the inflections in its voice, we should be able to judgewhat’s going through its mind sometimes without even needing forit to speak.”

“I’ll believe that when I see it.”

“Here, Model…” Jovus consulted the instructions… “719. Ifyou understand me, you may put on your clothes.”

Jovus was not at all certain that the appliance would followhis instructions so was a bit surprised when it did, ripping theclothing provided from their plastic sheath and climbing into them.It was a single piece garment with a seal that ran up the front fromthe crotch to the neck making it quick and easy to put on.

“Very good,” said Jovus when the appliance was finished andappeared to be waiting for further instructions. “Are you hungry?”

“Yes,” said the appliance after a short hesitation.

“Have you been instructed in how to prepare your foodstuff?”

“Yes.”

“Then you may do so. Use the service area for that purpose.”

It was uncanny the way the appliance collected its food aswell as compact frigidaire and stove devices used for foodpreparation and found its way to the service area.

“It’s going to be a while before I get used to having that thingaround the domicile, Jovus,” said Kiku.

“Not to worry,” assured Jovus. “I’m sure that in a week, we’llbe wondering how we ever got along without it. In the meantime, itsays here converting the shipping container into a rest alcove forthe appliance is only a click away.”

So saying, Jovus pressed the indicated spot on the display padand instantly, the padding inside the shipping containerreconfigured itself into a thick cushion.

“I’ll find a place for it out in the garage,” said Jovus.

“Why does it need a rest alcove?” wondered Kiku.

“Remember, the appliance isn’t a mech. As a biologicalorganism, it’s prey to all sorts of weaknesses besides the need toconsume foodstuffs to maintain its bodily functions. It also needsto remain inactive for some hours each day for similar reasons.”

“Then what’s the use of the thing?” Kiku wanted to know. “Itwould seem to be more trouble than it’s worth.”

“Well it does have its advantages including the fact that aftera while, it’ll be able to operate pretty much independently of its

owners,” observed Jovus, listening to the sounds the appliancewas making in the service area.

“We’ll see about that,” said a determined Kiku. “I plan to put itright to work first thing tomorrow.”

“Put it through its paces,” said Jovus. “That’s one of thereasons why we were assigned this early model. LMH wants tomake sure the appliances work as advertised under realisticconditions.”

Jovus was up earlier than usual the next morning in order torun a diagnostic on his electro-synapse systems before headingoff to the office. In the service area, he noted an unaccustomedsmell that he quickly associated with the foodstuff that had beenprepared by the appliance. Of the appliance, however, there wasno sign.

After his diagnostic was completed, he went back into thedomicile to look for Kiku and found his mech mate in the day roomdirecting the appliance on how to reconfigure the windowaperture’s tinting processors…a not uncomplicated task. “Startingit at the top are we?” asked Jovus.

“I figure if it could handle this it could handle almost anythingaround here…no, no, that’s too dark…adjust the chromo meteranother .08 degrees….that’s better.”

“Not bad.”

“It does learn quickly,” said Kiku. “Now do the same for allthe other apertures including those for the front and rear exitareas.”

As the appliance moved on to the next aperture, Jovus couldsee that Kiku’s thought had moved on also.

“Well seeing as you have things well in hand here, I’ll shoveoff to the office,” said Jovus, giving his mate a metallic peck on thecheek. “I have some ideas myself on some chores I’d like theappliance to tackle later on.”

“Have a nice day, Jovus.”

Jovus returned from work that evening eager to find out howKiku had made out with the new appliance and was pleased todiscover that all had gone well. For a biological organism that had

to take time to learn everything it did rather than access memoryfiles, it proved remarkably adaptable. In fact, sometimes it wentbeyond orders given it and made decisions on its own, decisionsthat were often improvements over its original instructions.

“It’s really quite a remarkable appliance,” admitted Kikuadmiringly. “More than once I told it how to do something andwhen I came back, I found that not only had it followed myinstructions, but came up with alternatives that were actuallybetter.”

“Such as?” asked Jovus, listening to the food preparationsounds the appliance was making from the service area.

“Well, remember how I was teaching it to operate the chromometer for tinting the apertures in the domicile? Well, it increasedthe tinting from .08 to 2 so that when I had it bring in the houseplants from outside, it set them in the west end of the domicilewhere the afternoon sunlight from the apertures there kept themblooming and their leafage firm.”

“Nothing strange in that…”

“But don’t you see? I didn’t tell it anything of the sort. Itfigured it out for itself and took the initiative.”

Impressed, Jovus looked at the appliance with new interest.

“And then, at meal time, it adjusted the voltage in myrecharge unit regularizing the flow while slightly increasing thepower outage so that I only needed to spend half the time in theservice area that I usually do.” Now, Jovus was really impressed.

“So, wanting to see just how versatile the appliance was, Idecided to test it,” continued Kiku. “I put it to work on the fabricintegrator…you know I’m making some carpeting for thecommunity worship hall…but deliberately left out any instructionson what it was to look like.”

“And…?”

In reply, Kiku led Jovus to another room. There, she lifted aheavy length of tightly woven, multi-layered fabric and held it upfor display.

“That’s what it came up with?”

“Clever, isn’t it?” said Kiku. “The other ladies at the worship

center will certainly be impressed with this design. See how theappliance departed from the solid color scheme that’s standard forcarpeting? Instead, it wove in all these complicated networks ofcolors with separate bands representing worshipers holding handsaround the Central Control Matrix! I’m really quite stunned at thepatterns. On the face of it, you’d never expect so many differentelements to work together but they actually unite in a coherentwhole!”

“You’re right,” said Jovus, taking a closer look at the pattern.“I’m beginning to believe that the company really has something inthese new appliances. I was planning on having it start work onreinforcing the domicile’s outer skin but now I think that might betoo simple a task for it.”

“I think you’ll be surprised at how it performs,” said aconfident Kiku.

A couple months later, Jovus stood outside admiring how hisdomicile’s outer skin shone in the afternoon sunlight. No doubtabout it but that the appliance had done a good job removing theplasteel shell, replacing the underlying support beams, and thenlaying down the new shell. What he hadn’t expected was the colorthe appliance had chosen for the outer skin, a reflective yellowthat accentuated the natural light and shone off the domicile tomarvelous effect when compared to the neighbors’.

Elsewhere, the appliance had shown a knack forlandscaping, selecting just the right shrubs and grasses thattransformed the property into a lush garden making Kiku the envyof her friends…all of whom at one time or another, had asked toborrow the appliance to work in their own homes.

It was just such excitement that LMH had hoped to foster byawarding the demonstration models to select employees. AndJovus could see that demand for the new appliance would bestrong indeed. But as much as he wanted to keep the appliancearound the house (Kiku would be lost without it), he’d beeninformed that it was time to fulfill one of the requirements of thecontract under which he was granted use of it in the first place.

He and Kiku had been visited by a representative of LMH to

see how the appliance was performing and after he’d beensatisfied with the report, informed Jovus that it was time to have itfulfill one of its other functions, one that promoters counted onbeing a key selling point for it. That is, it’s ability to duplicate itselfwith the owners standing to earn extra income with the forced saleof the duplicate back

to LMH.

Arrangements had been made by the company, said therepresentative who had visited the Morney household, for pick upof Model 719 for transportation back the LMH plant where it wouldbe mated with a female model to initiate the duplication process.

Jovus was uncomfortable with the notion of letting hisappliance out of his sight but there was really nothing he could doabout it.

Just then, there was thehum of an air car and looking up,Jovus saw a company vehiclebeginning its descent to theproperty’s guest pad.

No sooner had the carsettled down than its door sprungopen and Nirtiz Flawn stepped out.

Jovus was familiar with Flawn who had briefed him on thenew appliance line after his name had been drawn as one of theLife Model Humanoids’ employees chosen to take part in the trialprogram.

“Good afternoon, Jovus,” said Flawn, extending a hand ingreeting.

“Good afternoon, Nirtiz,” replied Jovus, taking his hand. “Itake it all has been arranged for the mating process?”

“It has. I’m happy to report that so far, test marketing for thenew line has gone smoothly and quite successfully with newenquiries from the public about purchasing the appliancesincreasing with each passing day. I don’t have to tell you, that theexecutive branch of LMH is more than pleased with how thingsare shaping up.”

“Well, if all the models have been performing as well as ours,it’s no wonder! Kiku and I sometimes wonder how we ever gotalong without one before,” Jovus joked.

“Hopefully, that’s what everyone will be saying onceproduction moves into full gear,” said Nirtiz. “And it starts with youin a way with this duplication process.”

“You say that the process has already been attempted?” saidJovus, not without some concern in his voice.

“Not to worry, Jovus,” assured Nirtiz.“Other appliance units have alreadyundergone the process with no damageand biologists in charge of overseeing ittell me that the first appliances involved inthe duplication effort are operatingaccording to expectations. The firstduplicates are due to be ‘birthed’ as thebiologists term it, in a few short months.”

“Is it dangerous?” asked Jovus, notcompletely

convinced.

“The process poses no danger to theappliances,” said Nirtiz. “In fact it is quite

painless except for some discomfort in the later stages for thefemale model but that is natural for such biological organisms.”

“How long will it take? I mean, how soon will our model bereturned to us?”

“That depends. It seems that due to their creativenatures…something you discovered for yourself in the past fewweeks I’m sure…the appliances require a period of emotionaladjustment before they can mate and even then it is not 100percent guaranteed that mating will occur.”

“Is that so?”

“Quite. These appliances are quite complicated organisms,Jovus. Don’t be fooled by how well they operate in the home.Remember, they were created by DNA remnants of our very ownbiological antecedents. It would take quite sophisticated

organisms to have created the first positronic brains you know.” “True. I often forget that.”

“Many of us do. In any case, normally, the mating portion ofthe duplication process shouldn’t take more than a few weeks andyour model will be back home before you know it.”

“Well, then, I suppose you’ll be wanting the appliance…”

“Surely.”

Jovus stepped to the domicile’s main aperture and called forKiku to bring out the appliance.

A few moments later, Jovus was joined by Kiku as they stoodbeside the guest pad and watched Nirtiz lift off with their appliancesafely secured in the vehicle’s rear storage area.

“I hope they don’t damage it,” said Kiku as the air cardwindled in the distance.

“It’s a valuable appliance and represents a significantinvestment by the company,” replied Jovus. “They’ll take goodcare of it.”

“I hope so, I was looking forward to having it refurbish theservice area and seeing if it would apply the same kind ofingenuity there as it did in the other assignments I gave it.”

“I have to admit that I don’t understand some of the things itcomes up with, but somehow, they seem more right than theywere before.”

“Does that make any sense, Jovus?”

“Frankly, no. I just wonder if whatever quality it representshas been taken into account by the company.”

Internal chronometers indicated that exactly 17 days, 8hours, 37 minutes, and 2 seconds passed by the time Jovus andKiku received word that their appliance was to be returned tothem.

When it did, they were relieved to learn that all had goneaccording to procedure with their own appliance taking no morethan the average time to bond with a female appliance and affectthe duplication process.

But when their appliance was delivered, Jovus and Kiku bothsuspected that something was different about it. What it was, they

couldn’t be sure but it was Kiku who first noticed that themusculature of the appliance’s face seemed to be more activethan it had been before it was taken away from them.

It’s mouth curved up at the corners more and the skin aroundits eyes crinkled such that the eyeballs seemed to twinkle. Also, itsbodily movements were quicker as if the thing had lost weight andbecame lighter on its feet. Ordering the appliance onto a scaleone day, just to satisfy her curiosity, Kiku found no change inweight from before it was taken away. Nevertheless, shecontinued to wonder.

Other changes that became more apparent as the dayspassed was that the appliance seemed to take more notice of itsoutward appearance, keeping its clothing tidy and clean andgrooming itself in a more conscientious manner than heretofore.

Events had at last reached a point when it began to take aproactive approach to its duties around the domicile. Most of thetime, Kiku didn’t need to give it instructions and often returnedhome to find the appliance had went to the shopping decks andusing the family credit pad, bought new furniture and equipmentfor the domicile. Not that Kiku or Jovus had any problem with that.In fact, they invariably approved of the appliance’s decisions; itwas just that sometimes the thing’s growing independence wasunnerving.

Finally, their concerns seemed justified one day some weeksafter the appliance had returned from participation in theduplication process when it walked into the day room where Jovuswas reading the news pad and Kiku was looking over the weatherschedule for the next few days.

“Yes?” asked Jovus from over the rim of the news pad.

The appliance had come to a stop near the center of theroom and Jovus noticed an unusual amount of movement in itsfacial musculature.

"Uh, oh,” said Kiku. “That means it’s troubled.”

"You can tell?"

“I’ve noticed certain expressions on its face are associatedwith its different moods. Those on display now usually mean it

wants to say something but doesn’t know how to broach thesubject.”

“You can read all that in simple muscle movements?” Kikushrugged. “Go on, Model 719, speak up.”

“Jovus, Kiku,” the appliance began, nodding slightly first toone then the other, impressing Jovus with its politeacknowledgments. “Ever since I arrived in your home, you havetreated me with fairness and patience. As a result, I haveconsidered my residence with you less as a domestic engagementthan as a member of the family.”

“Thank you, Model 719,” said Kiku. “It’s true that when youfirst arrived, I had some doubts about you, but you’ve sinceproven your worth and Jovus and I have come to find that ourlives here have been improved by your presence.”

“Then it should be a simple matter, a short step really, foryou to accept my request that you cease referring to me as Model719 and call me Smiley instead.”

Jovus and Kiku were nonplused, momentarily at a loss forwords.

“Smiley?” asked Jovus at last.

“Yes. It is the identification by which Delight…the femaleappliance with which I recently mated, named me.”

“Delight?” asked Kiku.

“The identification with which I named the female appliance.”

“You want us to call you by this…name…a female appliancegave you?” asked Jovus, still somewhat bewildered. It was asthough the recharger in the service area had suddenly asked himto call it by its own name or the chair he was sitting in for thatmatter.

“I take offense at your referring to Delight as an appliance,”said their own appliance as it continued to stand near the center ofthe room. “We are biological organisms.”

“Well, of course you are,” said Jovus in a reassuring tone.“But that doesn’t make you any less one of our householdappliances, a convenience of modern living.”

“I belong to your household, Jovus,” admitted the appliance,

“as Delight belongs to hers. But it is also true that Delight and Ibelong to each other and there lies the conflict that I’ve beenstruggling with. It is a feeling I have.”

“When did you first begin to have this feeling?” Not havingany experience with feelings himself, Jovus was somewhat at aloss in addressing the subject.

“I think I had feelings ever since you activated me upondelivery,” said the appliance, its facial musculature moving againand losing the upturned corners of its mouth. “Before that, I can’tsay, as I was dormant through my growth and educational phase.But surely, the emotions I had been feeling were accentuatedupon meeting Delight. They are now such that I have a greatyearning to rejoin her, to see her again.”

“I don’t understand this at all,” said Kiku, clearly alarmed.

“That’s all right, Kiku,” replied Jovus, trying to hide his owngrowing concern. “I’ve never heard of such a conflict in an LMHmodel before. Maybe there’s a malfunction somewhere? I was toldbefore your being delivered that your model was susceptible togerms and other microbes that could interfere with some of youroperations. Maybe this is the case here?”

“Perhaps,” admitted the appliance. “I’ve considered that andran a check on my physical condition but was unable to discoveranything amiss.”

“Then I think it best for now that you retire to your restalcove,” suggested Jovus. “Maybe a good night’s rest is what youneed.”

The appliance nodded in its characteristic way and asked“Will you accede to my request that you call me Smiley from nowon?”

“Certainly.”

“But…” began Kiku before Jovus motioned her for

silence.

“Go on now, to your rest alcove.”

When the appliance had gone, Kiku turned quickly to Jovus.

“What do you mean by going along with its deranged notion ofnaming itself?”

“It’s just temporary, Kiku. Until I go to work tomorrow andreport this malfunction to someone involved with the pilotprogram.”

But speaking with someone who actually knew somethingsolid about the operation of the new appliances turned out to bemore difficult than Jovus had anticipated and Kiku was forced tocontinue addressing the appliance in their home by the name itinsisted on being called.

The situation at the domicile was becoming quite tense somedays later when Jovus arrived home from the office to find Kikuquite beside herself.

“What’s the matter, Kiku?” asked Jovus, rushing to her sidewhere she sat despondently in the day room.

“Oh, I’m glad you’re home, Jovus,” said Kiku looking up. “I’vehad just about the worst day of my life.”

“What do you mean?”

“It was the appliance,” she explained. “You know how it’sbeen acting up since the other night when it asked us to startcalling it by name.”

“Yes…”

“Well, today the malfunction became more pronounced. Itbegan when I forgot to call it Smiley and it rebuked me.”

“What!”

“It did. It accused me of all kinds of things. Said I wasinsensitive, uncaring. Of course I tried to tell it that none of thatought to matter as it was only an appliance. I’m afraid I may haveraised the volume of my voice a bit which only seemed toexacerbate its malfunction. It began to shout something about itbeing a biological organism. That it had a right to be happy. A rightto be with Delight…oh, I don’t know. It was raving.”

“And then what happened?” asked Jovus, truly shocked.

“Then it just stormed out of the room,” said Kiku. “I heard itmaking some sounds in the service area and when I finallymustered the nerve to check, I found that it was gone!”

“Gone!”

“It must have run away!”

“Kiku. This is serious. That wasonly a demonstration model. If it’s reallymalfunctioning, it could pose a threatnot only to itself but to any mech itencounters.”

Suddenly, the discussion they hadhad with the appliance a few nightsbefore when it asked them to call it byname assumed more seriousimplications and Jovus determined tocontact someone in charge of the testprogram.

Quickly, he plugged himself into the householdcommnetwork

and contacted the offices of Life Model Humanoids this timeinsisting that he speak to someone in authority over the humanappliance program.

It didn’t help. He ended up talking to someone in marketingbut his continued insistence finally placed him in touch with NirtizFlawn. In a few words, Jovus explained the situation to him andonce Flawn was sufficiently alarmed himself, he vowed to bringthe matter to the attention of the test program’s directors.

With some relief that he’d done all he could for the timebeing, Jovus withdrew his jack from the comm-network and turnedto reassure Kiku that the situation was well in hand.

The denouement arrived quickly the next day when Jovuswas summoned from his desk in the accounting section to aconference room on the 32nd floor of the LMH tower where hesoon recognized many other fellow employees who had taken partin the human appliance test program.

There was a general hubbubuntil Nirtiz Flawn stepped onto araised platform at the head of theroom and motioned for quiet.

When it came, it was withsome disappointment that those inthe audience heard what he had tosay.

“As you all know, it was withgreat hopes and confidence thatLife Model Humanoids launched

its limited release test program involving its new line of humanappliances grown from original biological material saved from thepre-mech era,” Flawn began. “Forty employees were chosen atrandom to receive the first production models and for the firstseveral weeks, reports we received indicated initial success as theappliances easily adapted themselves to their new owners. Somuch so that the company began receiving many inquiries frominterested neighbors who had witnessed the efficiency of theappliances at work. As a result, LMH was gearing up itsproduction line for mass production of the new appliances.Unfortunately, things did not continue in that vein. Quirks began tobe reported among some of the recipients of the appliance but itwasn’t until many were returned to their owners followingparticipation in the duplication process that individual units beganto break down.

“Such breakdowns followed the typical example of Model 719owned by Jovus and Kiku Morney,” continued Flawn as Jovus’audio receptors pricked up. “In that case, the human appliancewas removed from its owners to take part in the duplicationprocess. All proceeded well with an effective duplication takingplace with the female appliance. The male unit was then returnedto its owners. At that point, what had been the unit’s strength, itsbasic creativity, learned responses, and adaptability, became thesources of growing dysfunction. Model 719 suffered a completebreakdown, became delusional, and eventually ran off.”

At that point, those in attendance began to talk amongthemselves again, many expressing shock and dismay at the ideaof human appliances running wild in public. Motioning for silence,Flawn continued.

“That case was not untypical and it was an easy matter tofind and apprehend the missing unit,” Flawn said. “As in previousinstances, the appliance had made directly to our plant here insearch of the female appliance with which it had cooperated in theduplication process. It seems that an unforeseen side effect of theduplication process is an attachment that participants developbetween themselves and that subverts the training given themduring the growth process. More, the attachment triggers somepsychological mechanism in the unit’s brain that once excited,cannot be reversed. Already, the company has had to dispose ofsome units that were judged as being beyond repair.

“Unfortunately, with the uncertainty factor still remaining andthe company unable to insure the safety of its potential customers,it has been decided to demand a product recall and discontinuethe new line,” finished Flawn, not to the disappointment of a few.

More concerned over how Kiku would receive the news thanwhat was happening in his immediate surroundings, Jovus let hisaudio receptors record the rest of what Flawn had to say forreview at a later time.

With the presentation ended, Jovus returned to his desk forthe remainder of the day until it was time to return home. Not eager toconfront his mech-mate on the issue, he had the air car take the longway to his domicile arriving well after dark.

He found Kiku in the day room studying the news pad. Seeinghim enter, she looked up.

?It was on the news tonight,? she said, not needing to sayanything more.

?Then you know we’ve lost our appliance,? said Jovus, taking thechair beside hers.

?I still hoped that ours would be an exception ...??I’m afraid not,? replied Jovus, who had accessed the file where

his audio receptors had stored the remainder of Flawn’s remarks.?The company has determined that the human material from which

they appliances were grown was intrinsically flawed.??Which means...???Which means there is nothing that can be done to correct the

flaws that make up the most basic elements of the human material,?explained Jovus, surprised at how calmly he was taking the loss of anitem that had shown so much promise. ?The head office at Lunar Anti-Gravatics saw no use in further research so it has ordered LMH to cutits losses by destroying the last of the DNA material as well as theforty production models and whatever duplicates that might havebeen created.?

?That’s too bad,? said Kiku.?Purely a business decision,? said Jovus, admiring the multi-

patterned rug beneath his feet. ?They were rather clever creaturesthough, weren’t they??

Pierre V. Comtois is a newspaper reporter writing from Lowell, MA, who has been

editing and publishing Fungi, the Magazine of Fantasy and Weird Fiction intermittently

since 1984. Comtois’ latest book, Marvel Comics in the 1970s: An Issue by Issue Field

Guide to a Pop Culture Phenomenon, was published in 2011 by Twomorrows Pubs. An

earlier volume, Marvel Comics in the 1960s,appeared in 2009. In addition, Comtois has

contributed fiction to many other small press magazines over the years including

Haunts, The Horror Show, Thrilling Tales, and an e-magazine, Planetary Stories.

Comtois’ fiction has also appeared in various magazines for Cryptic Publications

and Rainfall Books as well as such collections as Lin Carter’s Anton Zarnak:

Supernatural Sleuth, Eldritch Blue, and various Chaosium Books anthologies.

The author has also written a number of books including novels such as Strange

Company and Sometimes A Warm Rain Falls; non-fiction such as Our Lives, Our

Fortures, Our Sacred Honor; and short story collections such as The Way the Future

Was, The Portable Pierre V. Comtois, and found the time to contribute non-fiction articles

to such magazines as World War II, America’s Civil War, Wild West, and Military History,

many of which were collected last year in Real Heroes, Real Battles, a book published by

Sons of Liberty Press. Also from Sons of Liberty is River Muse: Stories of Lowell and the

Merrimack Valley, to which Comtois has contributed a personal recollection entitled ?I

Was A Teen-aged Bibliophile.? For more information about the author, visit

www.pierrevcomtois.com

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