january - south jersey mom magazine
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The January 2009 issue of South Jersey MOM MagazineTRANSCRIPT
January 2010
IT’S OURANNIVERSARY!a LOOK BACKat the first THREE YEARS
10 Things YouMUST DO
in 2010
the NEW YEARwith an
OLD HOLLYWOODTHEMED BASH
RING IN
2 | January 2010 Visit our website and sign up for our e-newsletter
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mom 2 mom8 Is Your Child Dyslexic?
10 When Your Child Fails, How Will You Respond?
11 10 Things To Do in 2010
moms R women 213 Forgive and Forget,
A Great Start to the New Year
14 Working Through Depression
15 Chick Lit: Start Your New Year Off Right with Two Mom Must-Haves
know 2 grow22 Is There a Wrong
Way to Build Self-Esteem in Your Kids?
23 Ask the ADDvisor
features17 Ring In the New Year
with an Old Hollywood Themed Bash
20 Three Firsts Every Mom Will Go Through
28 Turning This World Upside Down28 Summer Camp Guide
also in this issue3 publisher’s note5 nana’s 2 sense6 life sentences
24 business spotlight25 just born26 business spotlight27 thinking out loud29 green mama32 learning 2 learn33 book review34 resource guide35 things 2 do
This month we cele-
brate South Jersey
MOM’s 3rd Anni-
versary! I can’t believe
it’s been three years.
Kayden was just 9
months old when I
launched the
first issue.
I’ve learned
so much about
m o t h e r h o o d
from my own
children, and from
South Jersey MOM. My
friends always joke that,
oftentimes, some of the
article topics reflect my
own issues with mother-
hood. I think it’s just a
coincidence and has more
to do with the fact that
we cover topics ALL
moms can relate to.
I thought it would be fun to rewind
time and take a look at what some of the
very first issues of South Jersey MOMlooked like. Looking back was like look-
ing at old childhood pictures of one’s
self. You know when you see those pho-
tos, you can’t believe the clothes you
were wearing or you’re embarrassed by
the hideous hairstyles you used to have!
Of course, back then you didn’t think
they looked so bad. That’s how it was
looking back at those very first issues.
We’ve come a long way,
baby! (You can take a look
for yourself on page 18.)
The good thing is that
we are constantly improv-
ing the magazine. Each
month, we try to out-do
the previous month’s issue.
We’ve never become complacent
with where we are; always want-
ing to do better, keeping you
informed on what’s happening
in our area and in the lives of
mothers. (You are not alone, no
matter how much it sometimes
feels that way.)
This month is also Camille’s 2nd
birthday. She grew up way too fast. Even
readers have written in, people who have
never met me or my children, saying, “I
can’t believe Camille is so grown up; it
seems like just a couple of months ago,
you introduced her to South Jersey.”
Time does fly… and kids do grow
up… and things
change. But one
thing that won’t
change is my
c o m m i t m e n t ,
and the commit-
ment of our staff,
to keep bringing
you relevant,
relatable material
to help you be the
mom you want
to be. As always,
we welcome to-
pic suggestions and
your feedback. Let
us know what you
need, as we are here to serve you.
Your Friend and Fellow MOM,
www.southjerseymom.com January 2010 | 3
Table ofContents
January 2010publisher’s note
pg. 18 It’s OurAnniversary:Reminicising over South Jersey Mom’sFirst Three Years
Kayden enjoys the hippos at Great Adventure Aquarium!
Happy 2nd Birthday Camille!
Dear
4 | January 2010 Visit our website and sign up for our e-newsletter
Tis the Season for Healthy Smiles!
Call Armstrong Pediatric Dental to scheduleyour child’s dental check-up.
• Accepts a variety of insurance plans
• Expanded office hours to accommodate working parents
• New patients welcome
Armstrong Pediatric Dental, LLC.HEALTHY SMILE CENTER
Between Church St. & Chester Ave.Directly across from the Community Center
9 East Main Street • Moorestown, NJ856.235.0415
Fax: 856.235.4787www.armstrongpediatricdental.com
On the COVER“Cutest Kid in Town” winner: Jordyn is two years old and from CherryHill. She loves school, ballet and singing. Her favorite show is SuperWHYY and her favorite game to play is Preschool Jump Start. Jordyn lovesspending time with her family and especially her new brother Zachary.Photo by Lisa Ward Photography.
When I was in
grade school,
a “window”
was a way to dry my
hair. Back then, only
hair salons had blow
dryers. My mother did
finally get one of those dryers with a hose
and a plastic poofy hat. It looked a lot like
an inflated vacuum cleaner bag with the
hose attached — only pink. You had to
roll your hair and it took forever to dry. So
I dried my hair in front of the “window”
fan. It was pretty big and I could use it
most of the year. In the winter, I sat on the
floor in front of the heat vent. The vents
were huge in the old house we lived in,
about 1’ x 1’ square, so when the heat was
blowing, it was a pretty good dryer.
Today a “window” is a place on my
computer where I spend a lot of time and
get a lot of work done. And a “window” is
also an important frame of time; an oppor-
tunity. Over the past three years, I have
had the pleasure of spending almost every
Monday with my grandson. My grand-
daughter Camille’s birth two years ago
was an added bonus to my Mondays.
Kayden started preschool this year so now
on those Mondays, I only see him about
30 minutes before mom heads him out the
door to take him to school. Which, by the
way, he loves!
So on this Monday, after
Kayden went to school and mom
went to meetings, I played with
Camille. We colored with markers
whose tops we could not find. We
pretended to feed her baby and
every stuffed animal with a magic
plastic baby bottle that never goes
empty. I brought her a pink and purple
tutu to play dress up with and, when she
finally decided that she wanted to wear it,
she spun in circles until she dropped, gig-
gling. I also brought her a lemon flavored
lip gloss just for little girls. She loved
it…so much that after an exorbitant
amount of repeat applications on herself
and all her dollies, mom had to take it
away.
I realized on this particular Monday
that I am in the midst one of those win-
dows of time. The window of Mondays I
now have with Camille. So this year, and
until that “Monday” window closes, I will
most certainly cherish and try to make
every moment with both my grandchil-
dren very special.
Whatever will I do with my Mondays
when Camille starts school?�
—Nana Jean
Nana Jean is a South Jersey grandmother with two daughters and six grandchildren. Enjoy herstories about her 38+ years as a mom and 19 yearsas a grandmother as she shares her experiencesand lessons learned with lots of laughs and tearsalong the way.
January 2010
www.southjerseymom.com January 2010 | 5
nana’s 2 sense
Publisher/Editor:Adrienne Richardson
Editorial Associate:Jeanette Giza
Advertising Inquiries:Orin Jespersen • 856.690.5565
Dianne Holland • [email protected]
Elaine Petrosino-Roehm • [email protected]
General Advertising Info:[email protected]
Copy Editor: Gaily Von Schlichting
Production Manager: Lisa Celfo
Communications Manager: Esther Donnelly
Photographer: Lisa Ward Photography
www.lisawardphotography.com
Contributing Writers:Terri Akman, Eileen Bishop, Mary Pat Correro,Lela Davidson, Angela De Groot, Janice Harrell,
Jane Heiza, Linda Karanzalis, Fran LoBiondo,Teresa McEntire, Keri Mikulski, Renee Taylor
Negin, Gwen Recinto, Kathryn Ross, Judy M. Schneider, Nicole Simonin,
Sheila Taney, Martha Wegner
Submit Calendar Listing:[email protected]
Letters to the Editor:[email protected]
For Any Other General Information:[email protected]
www.southjerseymom.com
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�
�
My little brother, Joey, stopped
being little when I was 17.
I know that because of an old
snapshot we found. In it, I was ready to go
out for the evening, keys to Dad’s car in
hand, with my arms draped across the
shoulders of Joey, 14, and Mickey, 13.
They were Irish twins, six days less than a
year apart, as different as chalk and
cheese. Except, suddenly, they both made
me look a little squatty.
That picture was taken at a good time
in our family, when we had three in col-
lege and I was a senior in High School.
My father was acting gleeful about his
impending empty nest. His plan was to
spend his retirement years traveling the
world, financed by his children, who
would pay him back his fatherhood
expenses, with interest. He’d cut out news
items that tallied the cost of raising a child
from birth to age 21, and pin them on the
kitchen calendar with a note: PLEASE
REMIT.
The good time did not last. Two years
later, Joey was going through surgery and
radiation for a deadly type of cancer, and
our father died suddenly of a heart attack.
Joey tried to grow up quickly. By age
16, he had lost his father and his child-
hood within a few months. He found him-
self taking the four-hour trip to the hospi-
tal in a county-operated bus. He missed
half his junior year of high school. He was
bald from the surgery and tattooed from
the x-ray treatments. Today, shaved heads
and ink marks are
everywhere. But in
1979, he drew
stares like a circus
freak.
The cancer
went away, but the
radiation effects
lingered. It had da-
maged the sleep
center of his brain,
so that now he slept
sporadically, like
an old man; up at
night, drowsy dur-
ing the day. Two
strips of hair
around his ears
never grew back.
And, like many
childhood cancer
survivors, he strug-
gled to get started
in adult life.
We watched as
he graduated from
college, started a
job and left it. He
taught at Christian
schools in the Do-
minican Republic and Canada, but lost the
energy to keep it up. He got other jobs,
lost them, got depressed, pulled himself
up, got other jobs. He’d move back with
our mother, move out, and, within a few
months, move back, while his siblings,
one by one, became exasperated with him.
He never stopped being the little brother.
Still, he clung to his faith in God, and, for
the most part, kept his chin up. He loved
corny jokes and puns and playing with his
nieces and nephews.
In recent years, after several strokes
related to treatment, Joe became too phys-
ically disabled to work and was facing a
long fight to get disability benefits. On a
beautiful day in October, God in his mercy
called Joe home.
Preparing for the memorial service, I
found another old photograph: Joey and
me, on our front porch before the
Thanksgiving Day game. We are looking
fine, he in his garnet-and-gold band suit
with fringed epaulets, and I in my braided
color-guard dress with pom-poms on my
boots. I am chewing him out for making
us late, and he, my little brother,
stood hunching his shoulders under my
gale-force tirade. My mother, with her
love for the candid shot, chose that
moment to snap the picture.
Looking at that image, I wish I could
have cut out my own tongue. But that was
Joey… everyone’s little brother, exasper-
ating and lovable. Finally, he got to do
something first.�
Fran LoBiondo of Vineland has children in gradeschool, high school and college. A Purdue Universitygraduate with a degree in Journalism, she has written about parenting, food and fun for 25 yrs.
Spending this New Yearin Paradise By Fran LoBiondo
6 | January 2010 Visit our website and sign up for our e-newsletter
life
sent
ence
s
www.southjerseymom.com January 2010 | 7
Dr. Doyle is a board-certified family practitioner and Dr. Reddy is a board-certified internist. Both physicians believe in providing preventive care, not just treating symptoms.
The doctors are located in the new Swedesboro Plaza, at 95 Woodstown Rd., Swedesboro, NJ, offering easy access to Mullica Hill, Beckett, Woodstown and Glassboro.
For an immediate appointment, call 856-832-4359.
Salem Medical Group – Primary Care95 Woodstown Rd. • Swedesboro, NJ 08085
856-832-4359
Welcome Stephanie Doyle, M.D., and
Neetu Reddy, M.D.
Members of the Medical Staff at The Memorial Hospital of Salem County
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The Center for Autism Research at The Children’sHospital of Philadelphia islooking for participants fora research study focusingon early brain development.
Who are we looking for?• Infant siblings of
typically developing children
• Infant siblings of children with autism
8 | January 2010 Visit our website and sign up for our e-newsletter
L earning to read is an impor-
tant milestone for children.
By kindergarten and first
grade, children are associating
sounds with letters and forming
words from those sounds. They are
beginning to recognize “sight
words” and to spell words, if not
correctly, at least phonetically. For
some children, these skills come
easily; but for others, learning to read is a
challenge that can lead to frustration and
leave parents with questions about their
child’s development.
One possible source of difficulty
obtaining language skills is a learning dis-
order known as dyslexia. While only for-
mal testing can determine whether a child
is dyslexic, there are some signs parents
can look for in their child that might indi-
cate testing for the disorder is necessary.
Preschoolers and young children may
talk later than their peers. According to the
International Dyslexia Association
(www.interdys.org), they may add new
words slowly or have a hard time rhyming
words. Once they are in school, they might
have difficulty with sight words, with
relating letters and sounds and may reverse
letters or letter orders. For example, q and
p may look the same to them, as might god
and dog.
As kids progress through elementary
school, additional symptoms might appear.
For example, sequences can be challeng-
ing—from the alphabet to months of the
year or similar such lists.
When reading, kids might guess at
words rather than sound them out. Words
they have memorized are easily recogniza-
ble, but unfamiliar words present a chal-
lenge to dyslexic children. While language
skills are where most symptoms are evi-
dent, dyslexia can affect math skills as
well, as numbers can appear out of order or
inverted (75 instead of 57 or 6 instead
of 9). Bear in mind that many younger
children who are not dyslexic start out
confusing letters, numbers and words.
Again, professional testing is the only way
to determine whether a child is dyslexic.
Once diagnosed, children with dyslex-
ia are often able to learn better reading and
writing skills using such methods as multi-
sensory learning. The Wilson Language
Training system (www.wilsonlanguage
.org) is used in several New Jersey schools
to help teachers help their students. These
systems can help children who are dyslex-
ic, as well as those who suffer from
other language-based learning disabilities.
Parents can use these types of language
learning systems at home, also, to help
their children improve their abilities.
If your child is diagnosed with dyslex-
ia, it’s important to remember they can still
acquire a successful level of language
learning. The sooner alternative teaching
methods are put into place, the better level
of success your child can reach.
Parents should know that, even
though dyslexia is a type of learning
disability, dyslexic adults often exhibit
extraordinary oral communication skills
and can possess excellent memory skills.
Dyslexic children can grow to become
intuitive adults with successful careers and
great people skills. They are often entre-
preneurs or work in fields such as graphic
design, drafting, or art—fields where their
ability to memorize details in print works
to their advantage.
While parents should pay attention to
their child’s development, keep in mind
that children develop at their own pace and
learn in many different ways. But if warn-
ing signs do pop up, discuss them with a
healthcare or education professional.
The key to successful learning,
whether a child is dyslexic or not, is find-
ing the method that works best for your
child. Take advantage of the resources
available to help your child reach their
fullest potential.�
Is Your ChildDYSLEXIC?
By Renee Taylor Negin
mom
2 m
om
www.southjerseymom.com January 2010 | 9
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The way that a child responds to fail-
ure is influenced by his own percep-
tion and the reactions of the people
around him. While winning is good, there
is also triumph in failure in the sense that it
can teach you lessons guaranteed to last
through life. When kids embrace failure as
a normal part of life, they will not be afraid
to try new pursuits, thereby allowing them
to develop a healthy self-esteem.
If your child feels he is not being
appreciated for his efforts, he will work
doubly hard just to gain your approval. In
time, he will put it upon himself to always
achieve just to please you. He will never
be content with being just second best,
thinking that it will not make you happy.
And, when he finally succumbs to failure,
it may just shatter his inner drive to keep
on going.
Let your child know that everyone
gets to experience failure in small and big
ways. He can lose in a game with his
friend, or he may never get to join a
much coveted sports team. During these
instances, kids should never think they are
already set for a lifetime of failure. Guide
him on how he can make the experience
positive, either by helping him develop his
abilities, or by exploring his potential on
other things. Even with hard work, there is
still no guarantee that a child can get what
he wants. What’s really important is that
he’ll recognize failure should not put a halt
to all his goals. It should, rather, be like a
driving force to help him find his niche in
this competitive world.
When engaging in activities at home,
do not expect your child to produce a per-
fect output. If your child is not happy with
his drawings, tell him there is absolutely
nothing wrong with crooked lines. If your
child is frustrated, let him know it actually
takes time to master a skill. But with
dedication and practice, he can even-
tually develop the dexterity needed to
make straight lines. Make the experience
positive by complimenting him on his
progress and his
small achievements.
Children should
in no way associate
affection with suc-
cess. They should
clearly know that,
despite their missed
attempts and their
shortcomings, they
are well loved. Try
not to be overly crit-
ical, and always be
supportive. When kids hit rock bottom,
they may easily recover with the knowl-
edge that failure is always a part of life,
and even great men experience failure.
Your response to failure can also help
shape your child’s reaction to future situa-
tions. Show your child it’s okay to make
mistakes. If you just ruined a meal by
adding too much of a particular ingredient,
do not order take out just because you are
frustrated. If your kids can see you start
again from scratch, they may get the idea
that they can always have a fresh start too.
Young children may initially dislike
the concept of failure or even losing. But
when they get to see it’s just a stumbling
block they can overcome, they may learn
to develop the right attitude towards fail-
ure. Help your child overcome his fear of
failure by encouraging him to pursue his-
goals. Life has no rewinds, and it’s best to
live it to the brim.�
Jane Heiza is a mother of two and staff writer forGagazine.com. To learn more about positive parent-ing tips and helping your kids to deal with failure,visit www.Gagazine.com.
10 | January 2010 Visit our website and sign up for our e-newsletter
By Jane Heiza
When Your Child Fails...How Will You Respond?
Start a family tradition. We all have favorite childhood
memories: fun stuff like pizza on Fridays, bagels and donuts
on Saturdays, ice cream after each winning soccer game, and
even $5 for every “A” on the report card. This year, start
some new, creative traditions. Remember, they do not always
have to include “junk” food and sweet treats. For example,
call grandparents or family members on speaker phone once
a week. Or, hang a dry erase board in the kitchen and write
special family accomplishments.
Challenge yourself. Do you have a bucket list? You know,
things you want to accomplish in this lifetime? If you have
not done so already, write it down and make it happen. There
are a lot of interesting things to try, such as learning a second
language or running a marathon.
Set a new goal each month. This year, pick 12 things and
stick to them. Your goals may include cleaning the garage,
trying new recipes, using coupons whenever shopping or sav-
ing extra money for a family vacation. Whatever your goal,
write it down and stick to it. It may be helpful to do some
online research to help you get organized or get started.
Organize your pictures. Whether you have a stack of print-
ed pictures — or a ton saved to your computer — get organ-
ized! With online resources like Snapfish and Shutterfly, you
can create flipbooks with captions or print out pictures. Prices
vary, but are affordable.
Make health and fitness a regular thing. Most people are
great at making New Year’s resolutions, but have a hard time
sticking to them. If you have always wanted to get back into
shape, do it! One of the biggest things to remember is that
results will not come quickly and it’s going to be hard work.
Start off with small, manageable goals. For example, work
out every Monday to get your week and routine off to a good
start. Then, add more challenging activities and new goals. It
may help to work out with a partner.
Plan a “girls night in.” Nothing beats time with friends.
Make a list of your closest friends — and friends you haven’t
seen for some time — and schedule a time to get together.
Give them a call or send an Evite (www.evite.com) and have
them over. Get creative — consider hosting a pot luck, game
night or book exchange. You could even ask each person to
bring a guest.
Keep a journal. Life happens so fast we often forget about
the “small” things that happen everyday. Keep track of your
daily life or of your children’s lives. Jot down goofy things
they say that make you crack up. Years from now you can
look back and have a good laugh.
Teach your kids how to make their favorite foods.Whether it’s French toast or lasagna, teach your kids how to
cook. It’s a great way to spend time together. Before you
know it, you will have an assistant eager to help. One day,
you may even have a personal chef!
Give back to the community. Set a good example and
teach your kids the importance of helping others in need. You
may want to donate clothes you do not wear anymore or send
care packages to soldiers overseas. You could even partici-
pate in awareness and fundraising walks and get in shape at
the same time.
Go Green. Be “green” — and get your family onboard. It’s
easy. Turn the lights off when leaving the room, limit show-
ers to five minutes and reuse jars as storage containers. Use
both sides of a piece of paper and recycle whenever possible.
There are a lot of ways to be good to the environment. For
more information, go online to Worldwatch Institute
(www.worldwatch.org).�
10 Things 2010It’s a new year...and the perfect time to try something different
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to do in
1. 8.
9.
10.2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
12 | January 2010 Visit our website and sign up for our e-newsletter
www.southjerseymom.com January 2010 | 13
B aggage. We lug around the hurt, the resentment, the disap-
pointment and the anger caused by what our husbands for-
got, our girlfriends did and moms or moms-in-law said. We
hold on to our negative feelings to punish the people who hurt us,
when in fact we are only punishing ourselves.
Forgiveness is good for the body. It helps melt away the tension
and the stress locked in our muscles, helps build healthier relation-
ships and restores our feelings and thoughts to a positive state. It’s
also good for the people around us. When we are mad at someone,
we end up taking it out on the people around us – innocent
bystanders like sales clerks, coworkers and children bear the brunt
of our baggage.
Forgiving is difficult. It’s hard to let go. We want to lash out
and get even, so we carry around feelings that are toxic to our
systems and our relationships. How can we forgive somebody when
we do not feel like they deserve our forgiveness? Why should we
apologize when we were not the ones who were wrong?
Forgiveness does not mean condoning what has happened to
you. It does not mean they won and it certainly does not mean that
it’s okay for them to repeat their behavior. Forgiveness means
letting go of your anger and hurt and the power that those negative
emotions hold over you. It means you are ready to move on.
Forgiving is something you do for yourself, not for them.
Benefits of forgiveness:� It’s good for your heart. Less stress and anger means lower
heart rate and blood pressure.
� Forgiveness improves sleep quality; it eliminates the tossingand turning at night, reliving those hurtful experiences.
� Forgiveness improves relationships, based on honest feelingsand mutual respect, where you accept people for who they are
and not who you want them to be.
� Forgiveness promotes a positive outlook. Letting go and moving on lifts your spirits and gives you a can-do attitude.
� Forgiveness increases self-esteem. Forgiveness improves yourself-image and well-being when you accept yourself, faults
and all.
Forgiveness strategies:� Express yourself – use non-accusatory language and tone to
explain how their actions affected you. Expel those negative
feelings by putting them into words. If you are not ready to
share your feelings with the offender, then write them down in
a journal.
� Look for the positive – ask yourself what you have learned,rather than focusing on your emotions. Give yourself some
distance and objectivity.
� Focus on good qualities – yours and theirs. Nobody is perfect,and that is okay.
� Protect yourself – acknowledge that the actions of othersare beyond your control. Forgive and move on without
bitterness and without exposing yourself to further upset.
If you cannot be around that person without getting
sucked back into the cycle of detrimental emotions, then
perhaps it’s better to avoid those people and situations.
� Do not rehash the events and work yourself up over and overagain. It’s draining and a waste of emotion and effort.
� Seek professional help – sometimes feelings and situations aretoo complex or traumatic to work through on our own.
Consider talking with a therapist who will support you and help
you work through the process.
� Be patient – forgiveness takes guts, wisdom, time and imagination. It’s a long journey made up of tiny steps.
� Forgive yourself – come clean without beating yourself up.Have compassion for yourself and for others. Recognize your
own behavior and admit when you are wrong, at least to
yourself.
Forgiveness is a gift you give to yourself. Set yourself free from the
snarl of emotions holding you back and governing your choices. Is
it better to be right or to be happy? By forgiving others and forget-
ting what has been done to you, you will feel better about yourself.
This is me, baggage-free.�
forgive and forget–
“Forgiveness does not change the past, but it does enlarge the future.” —Paul Boese
mom
s R wom
en 2
By Angela De GrootA Great Start to the New Year
Depression – the word itself sounds depressing. Depression
is a serious medical condition that can affect men and
women of all ages, races and economic levels. It can
affect teenagers and children as well. It often interferes with a per-
son’s ability to function in normal activities and can last for
weeks, months and even years. The exact cause of depression is
unknown, but many researchers feel depression is caused by
chemical imbalances in the brain. These imbalances may be
hereditary or caused by stressful changes or events in a person’s
life.
Depression is more than feeling the blues or being down in
the dumps. It’s a state of mind that is often accompanied by hope-
lessness, sadness, discouragement and despair. As well as affect-
ing your mood, depression can affect your thoughts, your behav-
ior, your physical well-being and your outlook on life.
Depression can be mild or severe. People who are mildly
depressed carry on with their normal lives but are less sharp in
their thinking, less interested in things they were previously inter-
ested in and appear low in spirits. They continue doing necessary
activities such as taking care of themselves and their family and
going to work or school, but they often stop doing things they do
not have to do.
There are many treatment options for mild depression but the
most effective are lifestyle changes such as getting enough sleep,
regular exercise, a healthy diet and relaxation.
Major depression occurs when a person has five or more of
the symptoms below, for at least two weeks.
These symptoms include: • Feeling sad, hopeless and worthless
• Agitation, restlessness and irritability
• Trouble sleeping or sleeping too much
• Fatigue and lack of energy
• Dramatic changes in appetite, often with weight gain or loss
• Inactivity
• Withdrawal from usual activities or loss of interest in activities
that were once enjoyed
• Extreme difficulty focusing or concentrating
• Feelings of helplessness
• Crying spells for no apparent reason
• Difficulty making decisions
• Feelings of self-hate and inappropriate guilt
• Unexplained physical problems such as back pain or headaches
• Thoughts of death or suicide
In most mild cases, your primary doctor can treat your depression
with mild anti-depressants or suggestions for lifestyle changes.
But with major depression, seeking a qualified mental health
provider, such as a psychiatrist or psychologist, may be in order.
Depression is not caused by personal weakness, laziness or
lack of willpower. It can be directly linked to stressful events in
your life such as a loved one’s death, a divorce, loss of a job, ill-
ness, abusing drugs and alcohol, and even happy events such as
the birth of a baby or the holidays.
Most people associate the birth of a baby with excitement
and joy but childbirth can also cause feelings of fear and anxiety
leading to depression. Many new moms experience postpartum
depression, a more severe form of emotional distress. Symptoms
include mood swings, anxiety, sadness, crying, irritability, prob-
lems concentrating and trouble sleeping. Approximately 10 per-
cent of new mothers experience postpartum depression but, with
prompt treatment, symptoms can be managed, allowing the new
mom to enjoy her new baby.
Most people go through some type of depression at some
point during their lives so it’s important to know the symptoms.
Whether the depression is mild or severe, accept the fact that you
may need help. Something as simple as changing your lifestyle or,
more seriously, finding a healthcare professional can help you
work through depression.�
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Working through
By Janice Harrell
14 | January 2010 Visit our website and sign up for our e-newsletter
www.southjerseymom.com January 2010 | 15
chick lit
By Keri Mikulski
Start Your New YearOff Right With TwoMom Must-Haves
Keri Mikulski is the author of the upcoming Pretty Tough Series(Penguin/Razorbill), Screwball and its sequel, Change Up. Her first book in thePretty Tough Series, FULL COURT PRESS, will be available in Winter 2011.Keri lives at the Jersey shore with her husband and daughter. Disclaimer: Occasionally, the columnist receives books from authors and publishers for the purpose of a review and/or recommendation. However, rec-ommendations are based solely on South Jersey MOM’s audience and booksthat are sent directly to the columnist do not guarantee a recommendation.
Mothers Need Time Outs, TooBy Susan Callahan, Anne Nolen and Katrin SchumannDo you ever feel pressured to be the
“perfect” mom? Do you ever feel
worn out, stressed or just plain
exhausted? Well, time-outs aren’t just for
toddlers anymore, according to MothersNeed Time-Outs, Too.
Three mothers (one stay-at-home,
one who works part-time, and one who
works full-time) with ten children among
them set off on a journey to answer age-
old questions about parenting. After col-
lecting stories from hundreds of mothers
across the country, they discovered
happy mothering begins with balance,
and they have packed this amazing guide with useful mom-
tested tips and tales. If you have ever felt frazzled, check out
Mothers Need Time-Outs, Too.
Odd Girl Out: The Hidden Culture of Aggression in GirlsBy Rachel SimmonsBestselling author Rachel Simmons
uncovers the hidden truth about twenty-
first century female bullying with her
2002 sensation, Odd Girl Out. A fascinat-
ing and emotional read, Odd Girl Outexposes the abuse girls suffer day after
day at the hands of their peers, and
includes tactics on how to approach and
help your ‘tween and/or teen daughter. In
fact, this book is so powerful, The Boston
Globe deemed Odd Girl Out “required reading for young girls
and their mothers.” For more on female bullying, do not miss
Odd Girl Out Speaks Out: Girls Write about Bullies, Cliques,Popularity and Jealousy.�
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16 | January 2010 Visit our website and sign up for our e-newsletter
MICHAEL I. INZELBUCHAttorney-at-Law
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www.southjerseymom.com January 2010 | 17
olleen Mullaney, entertaining ma-
ven and author of It’s 5 o’clockSomewhere, is celebrating the New
Year with a classic chic flair. Many
will skip the expensive glitzy parties this
year and opt for more intimate gatherings
amongst family friends. Just because you
are skimping on expensive parties, do not
skimp on glam, style and fun for the
night’s festivities.
Throwing an old Hollywood themed
bash is a symbolic and great way to look to
the past while bringing in the new.
Mullaney touts, go classic. From cocktails
that Ingrid Bergman would enjoy to nib-
bles that would have Bing Crosby dancing,
throw a bash that celebrates the icons of
past Hollywood while welcoming in the
New Year and all that the future days will
bring. Here’s how to do it.
Setting the Scene: Start with the invite,
perhaps a black and white photo of
Hollywood legends, or a vintage style
photo of a champagne glass. Use a silver
metallic marker to send a sparkling mes-
sage about the soiree.
Décor should be easy, but stylish.
Black and white paper lanterns will add
great dimension; use accents of silver and
crystal. Candlesticks add festive glow
through the night. Photocopy vintage pho-
tos of stars and place them around the
party space for added fun. Fresh or faux
flowers of lilies in silver cups give a color-
ful fresh retro feel.
Eats, Drinks and Treats: Next, decide
on the cocktails and menu. A signature
cocktail will set the stylish scene and is an
instant party starter. Try something that’s
classic but that will appeal to the masses.
Nibbles can be anything from cheese
sprinkled popcorn to spiced nuts. More
substantial bites could include bite-sized
brie in puffed pastry, stuffed mushrooms
and, a classic by any standard, Swedish
meatballs.
Entertainment: Do not forget to make a
playlist for the evening. It should start out
with classic tunes to start, and move into
dance tunes to get everyone in the mood to
ring in the New Year with pizzazz! If a tel-
evision will be in the room where the party
is taking place, play a classic black and
white movie (be sure to turn off the sound,
so as to not clash with the music).
For a little added fun, bring out your
digital camera and set up an area where
you can have couples and attendees pose
for old Hollywood style photos. Have a
few props, such as a boa, top hat, long
gloves and huge faux diamond ring. Later,
you can create an album on your favorite
social site or web-based photo sharing site.
Do not forget the little party goers: If
your party will have little ones in atten-
dance, definitely include them in the fun.
Set a festive table for them, complete with
plastic champagne glasses and create a
mocktail that is Tinsel-town worthy.
Create a star studded centerpiece by hang-
ing glitter covered paper stars from
branches. Add fun to dips with star-shaped
chips simply cut out of tortillas with a star
shaped cookie cutter and lightly fried.
For a sweet treat try the below:
Baked Snowflakes• 12 flour tortillas
• 1 tablespoon melted butter
• colored sugar
• ¾ cup powdered sugar
Pre-heat oven to 350 degrees. Fold each
tortilla in quarters much like you would
fold paper when making a snowflake. Cut
out shapes with scissors. On a cookie
sheet, place the snowflakes and brush with
melted butter. Sprinkle each with colored
sugar. Bake 5 minutes and let cool at room
temperature. Dust with powdered sugar
and serve.
Whether hosting an adult or family-
oriented party, these are easy to do
ideas that keep the party going!
For more tips, crafts and recipes visit
www.colleenmullaney.com.�
C
Old HollywoodRing in the New Year with an
Themed Bash
South Jersey MOM is turning three! The maga-
zine, founded by Adrienne Richardson of
Vineland, has grown up in these first three
years. Adrienne has grown too.
South Jersey MOM Magazine was conceived by
Adrienne as a way to satisfy her creativity and drive
while staying home to care for her child. During her
pregnancy, Adrienne attended business courses and
mapped out her plans for the magazine.
Adrienne’s son, Kayden, was born in May 2006,
and postpartum depression almost kept the magazine
from becoming a reality. When she searched for
resources for herself and found them lacking, she
knew she had to share her story with others. Nine
months after Kayden was born, South Jersey MOMpremiered. Now, three years and one daughter later,
the magazine and Adrienne are both thriving.
Being a parent and a business owner is rarely
easy, and Adrienne admits it’s a constant balancing
act. Kayden, now 3½, attends preschool full time, and
Camille, 2, naps after lunch. Adrienne takes advan-
tage of their schedules to work on the magazine. She
admits there are times where she has to decide
whether to work or to play, but also appreciates that
she can be flexible with her schedule in order to spend
time with her family. Adrienne’s husband, Eric, was
skeptical of the idea of starting a magazine from
scratch. However, he has witnessed the success of the
magazine and now he’s her biggest fan.
Adrienne is proud of South Jersey MOM, and she
is passionate about it too. She still runs the magazine
from her home, keeping the overhead as low as pos-
sible and allowing her to be with her children. All of
her employees work from their homes as well.
The employees of the magazine are able to con-
tribute their talents to the magazine while taking care
of their families. The sales reps, the graphic designer,
and the writers all put their hearts into making the
magazine the best it can be.
The readers love the articles and can relate to the
topics the magazine addresses. Each month, Adrienne
writes a note to lead off the magazine, and many
times she has been told that people feel like they
know her from reading her notes. Adrienne admits her
struggles as well as her triumphs in these notes, will-
ing to share her personal life with the community she
feels so connected to.
During the rough economic conditions of the past
couple of years, many businesses have folded. SouthJersey MOM has had its share of struggles too, but is
doing well. Readership is steadily rising and there are
plans to expand into other markets in the next year or
two. Adrienne points out that the magazine and its
readers—that she and her readers—are part of each
other’s lives. “We’re not going anywhere,” she says.
“We’re here for you.”
18 | January 2010 Visit our website and sign up for our e-newsletter
By Renee Taylor Negin
www.southjerseymom.com January 2010 | 19
In a recent poll, 70 percent of
readers said they read the maga-
zine cover to cover. To Adrienne,
this is further evidence of the con-
nection between the magazine and
the community. She feels that SouthJersey MOM is both about and for its
readers. Adrienne enjoys getting letters
from readers. Oftentimes, they are writing
to compliment the magazine, to ask about
the writers, or to suggest a topic. She looks
forward to continuing that personal rela-
tionship with her readers, and hearing
from them about what they like about
South Jersey MOM and what they want
more of.
“If there’s a topic someone wants cov-
ered, you should definitely contact us and
tell us about it. We love to hear from you.”
South Jersey MOM will continue to
thrive and grow in the South Jersey area.
The magazine will continue to provide
local resources, valuable information and a
sense of family to the South Jersey com-
munity.
Happy Anniversary, South JerseyMOM! Here’s to your three years of
success and many more to follow.�
You could win one of the followingAMAZING prizes:
Enter to win at www.southjerseymom.com, click on (online exclusives), then (giveaways)
South Jersey
MOM’sAnniversary Celebration
• $200 gift certificate from TLC Creations• $150 portraiture gift certificate from
Lisa Ward Photography• $100 off flooring purchase from Matteo Kitchens• $100 gift card to Utopia Salon and Spa,
Vineland• 1 FREE month of boot camp classes at
Shape It Up Fitness, Mantua• Free Birthday Party at Canlan Sports, Vineland
(up to 10 children)
• FREE Three Month Full Access Membership for MOM and child at Cherry Hill Health &Racquet Club
• $50 Tupperware Surprise Pack• $30 gift card toward any personalized item
from Just For Little People • 1 Free Ultimate Afternoon Tea at Vintage
Rose Tea Room, Millville
1.2.
20 | January 2010 Visit our website and sign up for our e-newsletter
I’m not a fan of play dates, but I’ve learned to call another
mother and schedule time for our children to eat my food and
mess up my house. If it were up to me, I’d send them into the
street to find a friend, but I go along. As my kids get older,
though, I’m faced with a new kind of play date: coed.
It started when my son came home from school excited
about a certain girl he’d been partnered with on a field trip.
Sitting together and giggling, they became more than friends. “It’s a very exciting relationship,” my son said. Before I
could process this information he added a juicy tidbit. “We’re
going to either Hawaii or the Bahamas for our honeymoon so she
can wear those coconuts on her nipples.”
I was speechless.
“Sorry, breasts,” he said. Like that was better.
I pushed the honeymoon thing out of my
mind until later that night when he asked me
for my engagement ring. Yeah right—as soonas your dad upgrades me to the two carat.
Things were moving fast, but I appre-
ciated the upside. The same hormones
causing my son to smell like a hamper
were now making him like girls enough
to want to lose that stink. When he show-
ered, the intoxicating aroma of AXE body
wash and spray filled the house. When it
comes to grooming, we are working on lessis more. But information-wise, more is always
more. I had to play it cool.
“What do you call it when you like someone and they like
you back?” I asked when I tucked him in that night.
“The other kids call it being a couple,” he said. “But I don’t
like that.” Oh good. “Because we’re still just getting into eachother.” He had a point. “Can we have a play date?”
I froze, wondering about the protocol. Do I call the mom?
Does he call the girl? Can I send them to the playroom like I do
with the rest of the neighborhood rugrats or do I have to chaper-
one? The next day I called the mother and invited the girl over to
play. I even invited the little brother to come along to make it less
of a date. Now he and my daughter are engaged too.
“We’re getting married,” she said,
flashing me the Ring Pop she received.
I’ll have to get used to it, this pas-
sage from play dates to dating, from dat-
ing to rings. And when the big moment
comes, I hope my daughter will hold out
for something better. But really, a candy ring
isn’t so bad. It’s big, it’s gaudy, and when you
break up, you can eat it.�
Lela Davidson’s award-winning column, After theBubbly, appears regularly in Peekaboo magazine and
her essays have been read by parents around theworld. Read more at www.afterthebubbly.com.
As soon as anyone knows you are
pregnant, expect to hear every birth
and pregnancy horror story they
know. You will receive unsolicited advice
and everyone will want to touch your “baby
belly.” Rarely helpful, these invasions of
your pregnancy bliss can range from
annoying to infuriating.
Becoming a mother is the hardest and
best calling in the world. A new mom can-
not imagine how much she is going to
obsess over the new baby – 24 hours a day
every day for the rest of her life.
However, there are five things a new
mother should know that will help her
transition to motherhood.
1. First, give yourself a break. Be satisfied
with being a “good enough” mom.
None of us are perfect. Stop expecting
yourself to be the perfect mom. All
moms make mistakes so learn from
them.
2. Even in the earliest days of new moth-
erhood, take time to nurture yourself.
Do something every day for yourself,
even if it’s just to eat an ounce of dark
chocolate.
3. A mom needs to make sure she has bal-
anced nutrition, gets as much sleep as
possible, exercises and enjoys some
relaxation. A happy, content mom goes
a long way in fostering content children
and family.
4. Continue learning new skills while you
are growing a support system for your
mothering. Ask experienced moms
whom you respect to share their mother
craft. Seek balance in your mothering
and your whole life. This is a hard task
because you are a new, inexperienced,
but committed, mom. Ask for help and
delegate even if your help does not do
it your way. Done their way is better
than not done at all.
5. Finally, when all else fails, laugh.
Tears and laughter are both cleansing
and therapeutic. Laughter is more fun,
raises your endorphins and elevates
everyone’s mood. Look for the humor
and laugh out loud every day.
Cheers and Happy Mothering!�
First Crush…Falling in Love on a Play Date
New Moms Need to Take Care of Themselves TooBy Judy M. Schneider, IBCLC
By Lela Davidson
www.southjerseymom.com January 2010 | 21
3.
There are two types of first-borns.
Although they both desire control,
they use different methods to attain
it. The first type is a compliant nurturer or
caregiver. The second type is an aggressive
mover and shaker. Both types exhibit
many of the first-born traits listed below.
Firstborn Traits • Natural leader – majority of politicians,
directors and spokespersons are first-
borns
• High achiever – sets goals and reaches
them
• Picky and precise – pays attention to
detail and expects perfection
• Organized and competent
• Punctual
• Likes to be in control and does not like
surprises
• Can be moody and lack sensitivity
• Can be intimidating and refuse to take
no for an answer
• Sometimes can be a “know-it-all”
• Often bossy and feel they are right
• Responsible and tries to keep the rules;
will misbehave if rejected
• Tries to please others, especially adults,
may not say “no” or disagree because
they do not want to cause problems
• Poor at delegating because they want to
make sure it’s done right
If your child is a first daughter or first son
with an older sibling of the opposite sex,
he or she might exhibit firstborn traits.
Your child might also exhibit firstborn
traits if there are more than five years
between the child and the older sibling.
Don’t expect perfectionYour child already puts a lot of pressure
upon him/herself, so do not have higher
expectations than what the child can
achieve. Firstborns will set goals for
themselves. Make sure the goals are not
too difficult to attain or they will become
frustrated. Make sure your child is aware
of what your expectations are; otherwise,
they may assume they are higher.
Psychologist Kevin Leman says first-
borns seek their parents’ approval. “For
instance, let’s say you ask your oldest son
to make his bed. If you tell him it looks
good but then proceed to fluff the pillow
and straighten out wrinkles in the bed-
spread, you send the message that he could
have done better.”
Don’t demand too muchOlder children often do more work than
their younger siblings. Divide the work-
load as soon as the younger child is capa-
ble of helping. Do not expect your first
born to be an instant babysitter. Check
with their schedule and pay them when
appropriate.
Do not put too many responsibilities
on your child. You cannot expect a six year
old to watch her younger siblings and then
be responsible if something happens. Let
her know it’s not her fault and praise her
for telling you about the incident.
Provide one-on-one timeFirstborns enjoy adult company. They
often feel their parents do not pay attention
to them because they are consumed with
younger siblings. Spend time with your
firstborn, sharing an activity the two of
you enjoy.
Teach patienceEldest children are often bossy. They can
do more than their younger siblings, so
they may feel as if they are better. Remind
them that they were young once and
encourage them to have patience. Help
your child work through his or her frustra-
tions with younger siblings. It’s their job to
teach their siblings, not rule over them.
Fun Firstborn Facts • Fifty-two percent of US presidents have
been first born children, and most of the
others were firstborn sons.
• Many newscasters and TV talk show
hosts are first born, e.g., Walter
Cronkite, Peter Jennings, Dan Rather,
Ted Koppel, Oprah Winfrey, Phil
Donahue, Geraldo Rivera, Arsenio Hall
and Rush Limbaugh.
• Twenty-one out of the twenty-three
astronauts sent into space were first-
borns and two were only children.
• Oldest children are overrepresented
among college faculty.�
This article was provided by Families.com – a com-munity rich with articles, ideas, forums and blogsfrom family-minded participants. They collect thebest information and resources for family living andpublish the Internet’s largest collection of family-related blogs with new entries appearing each day.
Parenting Your First Born Child…What to Expect & DoBy Teresa McEntire
There are different schools of thought
about promoting self-esteem in chil-
dren. The pendulum swings back
and forth from one generation to the next in
the belief that you must constantly build up
your kids to make them feel special and
important.
The opposing view suggests that kids
must fit into society, and if you make them
believe they are too special, they will
become narcissistic and have trouble sur-
viving in the real world.
According to well-known family ther-
apist Daniel Gottlieb, best known for his
award-winning radio talk show Voices inthe Family on WHYY and his most recent
book, Learning from the Heart, parents
should not pursue self-esteem for their
children. That should be a byproduct of the
love and support you give them.
“Kids don’t have to know that they’re
great and wonderful, they have to know
that they’re loved,” he points out.
“Research shows that kids coming out of
college are self-absorbed, less resilient,
more narcissistic and their depression rate
is going up. Kids should grow up thinking
they are human, they are loved, they are
similar to everybody else and they have the
ability to make a contribution to the world,
to help other people. That’s where the gifts
are.”
Michael Kresloff, Moorestown dad of
two boys, ages 5 and 2, views helping his
children develop a strong sense of self-
esteem as one of the most important things
he can do as a father.
“I’ve heard it said that praising chil-
dren repeatedly helps kids feel good about
themselves, but this has always felt hollow
to me,” he explains. “I just don’t see how I
can create self-esteem through praise
alone. I really think, for the most part, a
child has to have self-esteem grow from
within.”
Kressloff adds that he does not want
his kids to ever feel that he has unrealisti-
cally high expectations of them.
”Sure, I have certain fundamental
expectations, but I want my kids to be who
they are, not who they think I want them to
be,” adds Pam Girgenti, who has 5 and 6
year old daughters and lives in Marlton.
“Teaching your children about self-esteem
means letting them know you love them,
mistakes and all.”
Susan Ambrose, mother of three chil-
dren, ages 8, 7 and 5, from Moorestown,
says, “I tell the kids never, never leave any-
one out of anything and always stick up for
other kids if they can’t do it themselves.”
Ambrose teaches her children to
believe in themselves and encourages them
to always feel confident to come to their
parents seeking advice or help. She also
urges them to “dream big” and take respon-
sibility for their actions.
While most parents try to build up
their children’s confidence with praise,
Gottlieb urges parents to be careful how
they do that. Reinforce a behavior, such as
“you did great on that test, and I’m happy
for you and proud of you.” But do not go
overboard and tell them that they are a
math genius.
“Over time, they’ll come to know that
there’s something precious inside, and
they’ll learn that by knowing that they’re
loved and secure and they have successes
and failures,” Gottlieb says.�
Terri Akman is a freelance writer and preschoolteacher at M’Kor Shalom in Cherry Hill. She hasthree children and lives in Voorhees. Check out herblog at www.preschoolteach.blogspot.com.
Classroom time includes a mix of teacher-directedas well as independent learning center activities.
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22 | January 2010 Visit our website and sign up for our e-newsletter
Is there a Wrong Wayto build self-esteem in your kids?
know
2 g
row
By Terri Akman
I dread when my child comeshome from school and the home-
work battle begins. It causes chaos inour home right up until bedtime. Whyis it so difficult for my child to do home-work?
Take heart, you are not alone in this
dilemma. Children with ADD have
ongoing struggles with homework. From
the moment the assignment is given to
completion, many skills and behaviors are
involved. Being easily distracted means
your child has a difficult time with each of
the steps below. Each one of these steps is
a challenge and causes conflict.
1. Processing the assignment (hearing,
writing and understanding it).
2. Deciding what materials should be
brought home to complete assignments.
3. Unpacking the book bag, organizing
materials, prioritizing assignments and
managing time.
4. Doing the work by putting forth extra
effort on a boring task. Those with
ADD have brains that shut down com-
plex, tedious tasks without stimulation.
5. Pack up book bag.
6. Turn the homework in.
How much time should I allow mychild to spend on homework?
The rule of thumb to follow is 10
minutes per grade level. Typically
children with ADD take two to three times
longer to complete homework than their
peers. As your child gets older, the amount
of time it takes causes distress and takes
away from the benefit of homework.
Schedule a meeting with your child’s
teacher. Bring samples of work with notes
on how long it took
to complete each
assignment and
what it took to get it
done. Ask for sug-
gestions and have a
follow up meeting.
If the struggle con-
tinues, your next
step is to request a
504 Plan* in writ-
ing, which will pro-
vide accommoda-
tions and modifica-
tions for homework
and in-class sup-
port. If your child is
on medication, you
may want to contact
your physician and
ask about a small
dose after school to
help with home-
work, but one that
won’t keep your
child up at night.
Your physician will
help you determine
if this is best for
your child.
What types of strategiescan I use at home to help
my child with homework?
Allow your child to unwind
for a half hour before start-
ing homework. During this time, try to
have your child do something physical:
stationary bike, treadmill or good old fash-
ioned outside play. Research indicates
physical activity improves focus. Make
sure your child starts homework immedi-
ately afterwards to utilize this benefit. Your
role is to provide structure, support and
encouragement…not to re-teach them the
work. Homework is for your child, not you!
Stay focused on actually learning some-
thing from it, rather than just getting it over
with or earning the grade. To be successful,
most of the children I see need to have a
behavior modification program in place
which has been designed specifically for
them. A “one size fits all” approach is not
beneficial. This involves setting up rules,
rewards and consequences along with
parent coaching.
How can I help my child getorganized?
If your child is anything like others
with ADD, your child’s room and
book bag probably look like a disaster area.
You can help your child by color-coding his
or her textbooks, notebooks and folders by
subject area. Visuals are extremely helpful
to children with ADD. Post a list of what
needs to be done, and in what order, after
school. A clear plastic folder works well for
holding completed homework.�
*A 504 Plan is a legal document that protects those with disabilities or other healthimpairments so they can receive special accommodations in school to achieve better learning.
Linda Karanzalis, M.S., founder and owner ofADDvantages Learning Center in Cherry Hill is thecoordinator of CHADD of South Jersey, a non-profitorganization serving children and adults with attention deficit disorder. Listen to her “Ask theADDvisor‚” radio show on 92.1 FM. For more info contact Linda Karanzalis at (856) 482-0756 or atwww.addvantageslearningcenter.com.
Moorestown Friends School
3 year olds through 12th grade 110 E. Main St. Moorestown, NJ 08057
For more information, call (856) 235-2900, e-mail [email protected] or visit mfriends.org.
The Early Years Matter
Our college preparatory program runs seamlessly from Preschool (age 3) – Grade 12.
Learn more about a transformational educationfor your child at an upcoming Open House:
Sunday, January 24, 2 p.m.
Thursday, February 18, 7 p.m. (Middle/Upper School only)
Saturday, February 20, 10 a.m. (Lower School only)
By Linda Karanzalis, M.S. Learning Specialist/ADD Coach
Ask the
Q.
Q. A.
A.
ask the AD
Dvisor
www.southjerseymom.com January 2010 | 23
Q.
A.
Q. A.
ADDvisor
24 | January 2010 Visit our website and sign up for our e-newsletter
The American Academy of Pediatric Dentists recommends establishing a “Dental Home” for your child by their 1st Birthday Come Join
our Fam
ily
• Commitment to children’s dental care for over 30 years
• Treating infants thru adolescents• Focus on prevention education• Orthodontist on staff*• Flexible hours at two locations
Your Child’s Very Own Dentist
GEORGE T. LYNCH IV, D.M.D. *JANINE R. TRINDADE, D.M.D. JUDITH SAMSELSKI, D.M.D.
PEDIATRIC DENTISTRY - A PROFESSIONAL ASSOCIATION
GREGORY D. McGANN, D.M.D.PAUL A. SIMONS, D.D.S. STACEY A. YANDOLI, D.M.D.
432 Ganttown Rd., Suite 203, Sewell • 776 Grove Rd., West Deptford856.589.6886 • www.kidsowndentist.com • 856.848-2211
FREE Monthly seminar on infant oral health forpregnant moms, new moms, and moms trying to conceive. For more info visit our website.
W. Deptford Office
CHECK OUT MOMMY MORNINGS!
Call for dates and more info
There is nothing cuter than a gapped-tooth smile on
a child, especially when his or her teeth are healthy.
Today, parents recognize that strong teeth do not
just happen, and that dental care is an important part
of your child’s overall health. Luckily, Your Child’s Very Own Dentist is on a mission to keep your children’s
smiles in tip-top shape. The colorful, kid-friendly office is wel-
coming to kids and parents alike.
What makes Your Child’s Very Own Dentist different from the
dentist you grew up with is their devotion to early prevention of
dental issues.
“We want to see patients as young as possible to instill good
habits,” explains Stacey Yandoli, one of the five pediatric dentists
serving offices in Sewell and West Deptford. “That, ideally, starts
when the mother is pregnant because, even in the very beginning,
you can affect your child’s future oral health.”
Your Child’s Very Own Dentist offers informal monthly hour-
long seminars for parents to discuss things they can do to help
prevent dental decay in their children.
“A lot of the focus is getting the mom’s oral health to be as
good as it possibly can be,” suggests Yandoli. “Studies show that
the mom’s bacterial flora is passed on to their children and some
of these bacteria are the ones that cause dental decay.”
The group sees kids from infant to adolescent. Families are
encouraged to bring their children in for their first visit when the
child reaches age 1 or six months from the eruption of the first
tooth, whichever comes first. That visit gives the kids a chance
to meet the dentist and get a feel for the office, which has kid-
friendly DVDs running at every chair.
This visit also provides a chance to further educate parents
about important dental health tips. Topics of discussion include:
habits to avoid, when to discontinue the bottle, non-nutritive suck-
ing issues (such as the use of pacifiers) and healthy food choices.
“There are hidden dangers in kids’ diets; things you wouldn’t
consider a ‘bad snack’ but are actually pretty bad for your teeth,”
points out Yandoli. “Fruit snacks and fruit roll-ups are sometimes
advertised as being healthy, like fruit, and maybe have Vitamin C
in them. But, they are so sticky and high in sugar [that] they don’t
come off the teeth, even with good brushing.”
Juice is another problem for children’s teeth, as it’s so high in
sugar content. Parents think diluting juice with water fixes the
problem, yet, by sipping even diluted juice out of a sippy cup all
day, the kids are still constantly bathing their teeth in sugar. “Your
mouth never gets the chance to go back to a good environment to
fight decay,” says Yandoli.
Your Child’s Very Own Dentist understands that education is
the front line defense against cavities and other dental issues.
Come in, meet the staff and find out how you can best keep your
children’s teeth healthy. With the new year under way, make a
resolution to stay involved with your children’s dental routine.
When brushing, check to see they are reaching all of their teeth,
that their gums are not bleeding and, if they do not have the
manual dexterity to floss, be sure to help them out.�
Dr. Yandoli’s partners are Gregory McGann, D.M.D and Paul A. Simons, D.M.D. Their team also includes associates George T. Lynch IV, D.M.D, JudithSamselski, D.M.D. and orthodontist Janine R. Trindade, D.M.D. They alwayshave a dentist on call to handle emergencies. For more information call (856) 589-6886 in Sewell, or (856) 848-2211 in West Deptford. Or, visit them on the web at www.kidsowndentist.com.
busi
ness
spo
tligh
t
By Terri Akman
Your Child’s Very Own Dentist
www.southjerseymom.com January 2010 | 25
just bornFlings Party BinsDeveloped to make trash and recycling more accessible, easier and fun. Great for parties and events at home or away. Flings make clean-up a snap!Your guests can’t help but spot them, which means less mess to clean yourselfat the party’s end. Leaves bottles and cans already separated. FREE SHIPPING ON ALL ORDERS! 4 for $15.99, www.Flingsbins.com
Bottle SnugglersNeed an extra hand? This bottle support system is designed to assists duringbaby’s feeding time. It supports the bottle while you hold the baby, leaving a hand free. No more propping the bottle under your chin or on unstable surfaces! Just insert the bottle into the Bottle Snuggler, position it properly,and everyone wins. Great for parents with multiples. Machine washable.$23.95, www.Bottlesnugglers.com
Bumble BellsBumble Bells are the original baby tracking device! These expandable, 925sterling silver anklets are beautiful accessories with bells on them so that youcan hear wherever baby goes. Choose from several designs. $45 and up,www.Bumblebells.com
Stay With Me SocksFinally…socks that stay on baby’s feet! This unique design helps keep littlesocks on tiny feet until they are taken off. Stay with Me Socks also looptogether easily for washing. No more lost socks! 0 – 14 months. $4.50 and up, Target or www.staywithmesocks.com
My Baby ZooThis unique and cute sleep trainer shows, in an intuitive way, when your child is allowed to get out of bed or still needs to catch some sleep: EyesClosed – “I should be sleeping”, Eyes Open – ”Rise and shine!” $34.99,www.mybabyzoo.com
BornFitBornFit is an active wear collection for moms of all ages and baby too. The collection flatters the figure before, during and after baby. The products celebrate loving ones self and a journey toward healthy living. The beautyof being “fit” is that it comes in all different sizes, shapes, interests and passions. Prices vary, at running stores or www.Bornfit.com.
Fillo FactoryThe Fillo Factory, with over 25 years experience in the Fillo business have per-fected the art of creating Fillo dough and Fillo dough products. With a varietyof vegan, vegetarian, organic and Kosher products, they are not only delicious,nutritious and creative, but also fit into today’s lifestyle by being both healthyand convenient. Prices vary, BJs Wholesale Club or www.fillofactory.com
GrippiesThe no-slip solution for tights, socks and gloves. Now you don’t have to worryabout the kids slipping on tile or hardwood floors. Make any pair of sock ortights non-slip. Available in various shapes. Offered in adhesive and iron-onoptions. $5.99 and up, Target or www.grippiesonline.com
Eti-Kits: Napkin Clips Growing up we were always told to place a napkin in our laps, the only problem is little ones tend to move a lot, which means by the time somethingspills those napkins are gone. This is where Napkin Clips come in. Perfect fordiners of all ages who want to keep their clothes clean while dining at thetable or on the go. 6 clips for $8, www.Eit-kits.com
Spoonful of ComfortBe comforted by the warmth and greatness of old-fashion chicken soup; ahome-style taste that even grandmas would approve of! Chicken soup haslong been touted by grandmas everywhere as being “good for what ails you”.If someone you love is sick, sad or having a bad say…send a little comforttheir way! $32, www.spoonfulofcomfort.com.
Looking for the latest gadgets, toys, books or familyrelated products? Look no further! Each month, we highlightthe latest and greatest just for you. Take a look at these “justborn” products and add them to your list of must haves!
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26 | January 2010 Visit our website and sign up for our e-newsletter
January is the busiest time for those who want to get back into
the habit of a healthy lifestyle, get into shape and lose those
few extra pounds they gained over the holidays. New Year’s
resolutions provide the additional drive to make some changes.
The unfortunate reality is that most New Year’s resolutions
are broken within the first week and more than half are complete-
ly forgotten by the end of January. Why do we give up on our res-
olutions? Most people fail at keeping their resolutions because
they were not 100 percent committed, had poor planning, lacked
time management or lacked support.
How can you break the cycle this year and stick to your
resolutions?
“Resolve” means to decide with determination and a fixed,
firm purpose. So, if you are not 100 percent committed to reach-
ing your resolution, then it’s only an idea or a wish. Once you have
made the commitment, you will want to make some S.M.A.R.T.
goals for yourself. Here is an easy formula for setting those goals:
Specific – A specific goal has a higher chance of being
accomplished than a vague or general goal. Ask who, what,
when, where and why.
Measurable –When you measure your progress, you stay on
track and experience the exhilaration of accomplishing each
smaller goal which spurs you on to continue your effort to
reach your ultimate goal.
Attainable – When you plan your steps wisely and establish
a realistic time frame, you can attain most goals.
Realistic – A realistic goal must represent an object for which
you are both willing and able to work.
Timely – A goal should be grounded within a time frame.
With no time limit, there is no sense of urgency.
Remember to be patient with yourself. Constantly remind yourself
of the commitment you have made. Measure and track your
progress often. Do not be too hard on yourself. Stick to it and you
will achieve your resolutions.
If you need more help, contact Shape It Up Fitness. They
have helped many people, just like you, master their metabolism
and fire up their fat-burning furnace. Their exclusive S.H.A.P.E.
Method works to burn the maximum number of calories, tighten
and tone those trouble spots and give you the lean, firm body
you want.�
Nicole Simonin is the owner of Shape It Up Fitness located in Mantua. Shape It Up Fitness guarantees results. Bringing the “personal” back into fitness training! Get your Free Health and Wellness Package today atwww.ShapeItUpFitness.com or call (609) 501-0587.
busi
ness
spo
tligh
tHOW TO BE
S.M.A.R.T. About Your New Year’s
Fitness Resolutions!By Nicole Simonin, CPT, LWMC, PTA
December 31, 10 p.m.: big plans for 2010 are
being made in my head and I am very gung-ho
about it! January 1, 12:01 a.m.: I have already
started forgiving myself for resolutions broken. I figure
I’d better get to bed before I really start waffling! By January 7,
most of my big ticket promises are laying by the side of the
road, abandoned. I do not linger long in my shame because I
have decided that, sometimes, the small promises are the most
important to keep because, like many small embers, great
flames can take flight…how is that for rationalization?!?
In all seriousness, my philosophy is to try and put into prac-
tice the lessons learned through mistakes made as a mother, a
wife, a friend, a daughter, a human. So instead of beating myself
up for the stupid thing I did last September, when a similar sit-
uation comes up in February, I will, hopefully, deal with it bet-
ter, based on my experience. I think the trick will be putting my
money where my mouth is, but only time will tell.
One of the promises I plan on keeping and which will prob-
ably cause me the most angst is to try and wear my rose-colored
glasses a little more often. Whereas, I know correcting my many
faults and keeping my many promises of self-improvement is an
ongoing effort, if I don my glasses and peer into a mirror, I may
cut myself a break because I will see a woman who tries every
day to do the right thing and does not do all that badly by her
family. Sure, she yells like a banshee on the warpath more often
than she would like. She lets her kids watch more than the rec-
ommended amount of television and she orders out at least once
a week, but at the end of the day, her children kiss her and hug
her and tell her she is the “best and beautifulest mom ever” and
her husband still looks at her like a beauty queen. Sweet.
Look, it’s simple. We’re human. As parents, we have to
understand that we are not dealing with peers; we are dealing
with a very intelligent, high-energy being and doing the right
thing at the right time with the right temperament is, to say the
least, hard. We do the best we can, we pray every day that it’s
the right thing and that tomorrow will be a better day… even if
today was a great day.
There is no job in the world, which I am sure you will
agree, better than being a mom. Nothing compares – nothing. If
we can resolve in the New Year to try and enjoy it as much as
absolutely possible, I think that is enough. It’s enough for our
kids to see us smiling because, in their minds, if we are smiling,
they are not in trouble… what more could a kid ask for?
Happy, healthy 2010 all you South Jersey moms (and dads
secretly reading)!! May you wear your rosy glasses often and
cut yourself the same breaks your kids cut you daily.�
Eileen Cassidy Bishop is a National Sales Rep turned stay-at-home mom fromFlorence, NJ who, along with her husband Gene, is raising their two children,Leo and Catherine and doing whatever she can to keep her name from comingup at her children's therapy sessions twenty years from now!
www.southjerseymom.com January 2010 | 27
thinking out loud
Another Chance
By Eileen Bishop
We all prepare to care for our children...
MAYBE IT’S TIME TO PREPARETO CARE FOR OUR PARENTS!
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This month, on January 18, we celebrate our newest national
holiday, one that we have celebrated for less than 20 years:
Martin Luther King Jr. Day. My children are happy to
have no school that day, but I’ve wondered, do they know why we
celebrate?
I asked my children what they knew about Martin Luther King
Jr. The answers they gave were pretty accurate: he fought for civil
rights for African Americans, he spent time in jail, he led a march in
Washington, he wrote the “I Have a Dream” speech, and somebody
shot him. My children had been taught well. But I couldn’t help but
feel that the knowledge they had was a little rehearsed. It was just
knowledge… knowledge in the head, but not in the heart. This both-
ered me. I want my children to understand the significance of this
holiday and, most especially, the significance of the man himself. I
want to teach my children about Martin Luther King Jr. and the
great things he did to promote equality in this nation. I want them to
understand his intelligence, his great speaking skills, his faith and,
most importantly, his courage. I wanted to make this great man
more real and meaningful to them and to their lives, not just anoth-
er excuse to skip school.
I headed to the library, where I checked out lots of books on the
subject. Buried in my stack of library books, I found one sparkling
solution to my quest. It’s called, My Brother Martin: A SisterRemembers Growing up with the Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.,(Simon and Schuster, 2003). It’s written by Martin Luther King Jr.’s
big sister, Christine King Farris. Written in a simple, straightforward
style, this book tells what it was like growing up with her brother,
Martin Luther King Jr. Christine describes her childhood with M.L.
(the family’s nickname for Martin) and their youngest brother, A.D.,
“…like three peas in a pod, we grew together. Our days and rooms
were filled with adventure stories, and Tinkertoys, with dolls and
Monopoly and Chinese checkers.” M.L. also liked to play baseball
with the white boys across the street until the children’s mother put
an end to it. Trying to explain to the confused children why this hap-
pened, M.L. and Christine’s mother said, “Because they don’t
understand that everyone is the same, but someday, it will be better.”
According to his big sister, M.L. looked into his mother’s face and
said, “Mother Dear, one day I’m going to turn this world upside
down.” Which of course, he did.
What struck me about this story was that, in fact, Martin Luther
King Jr. was just a regular kid with some remarkable insights.
Insights we hear every day from our own children, if we take the
time to acknowledge and nurture these insights into action.
On top of that, he had exceptional parents, who provided mod-
els of courage and integrity to their children. According to Christine,
“… a police officer pulled Daddy over and called him ‘boy’. Daddy
pointed to M.L., sitting next to him in the car, and said, ‘This is a
boy. I am a man, and until you call me one, I will not listen to you.”
So this year, my children and I are talking differently about
Martin Luther King Jr. Sure, we remember the great speeches and
the thousands who marched with him to Washington. But mostly,
we remember a little boy. A boy who knew from an early age that
he would fight for justice for all people. Using little M.L. as an
example for themselves, my children are thinking that perhaps they
too can speak up when someone is being excluded or bullied or
shunned because they are different.
As a parent, I’m thinking differently about this day too. I’m
looking for ways that I can nurture that spark in my children, the one
that will make them want to fight for justice and peace in this world,
just as Martin’s parents did. And I’ll be looking for ways that I can
be a model of justice and courage for my own children.
Christine King Farris ends the book, “… my brother never for-
got the example of our father, or the promise he made to our moth-
er on the day his friends turned him away. And when he was much
older, my brother M.L. dreamed a dream…that turned the world
upside down.”
Maybe with a little effort and a lot of courage we can all do the
same.�
28 | January 2010 Visit our website and sign up for our e-newsletter
By Martha Wegner
By Sheila Taney, RN, MSN
ENERGY
The days are shorter and the nights are colder. Winter months
keep us inside more often, which means we use more ener-
gy. Try some of these easy tips to decrease energy use. The
tips will carry over into the warm weather months as well.
� Close heating vents in rooms that are not used.
� Seal leaky windows.
� Open window blinds to let natural sunlight in for extraheating. Close them in the summer for cooling.
� Run the washing machine and dishwasher before 8 a.m. or after 8 p.m.
� Lower the water heater thermostat.
� Turn off the lights/TV/computers when you leave a room.
� Keep the heat on the lowest comfortable setting.
� Switch to CFL or LED light bulbs.
� Line-dry clothes as much as possible.
� Wash dishes in a full dishwasher.
Teach your children the importance of these energy-saving
measures and they too will do their part. These little tips will
bring big savings to your energy bills and reduce your carbon
footprint.�
Sheila Taney has two children and resides in Cherry Hill. She is passionateabout teaching her children and others how they can participate in saving the environment.
green mam
azappers
www.southjerseymom.com January 2010 | 29
Looking for Child Care?Promote children,families and qualitylearning in Gloucester andCape May Counties
• Parent Referrals• Child Care Subsidy
Assistance• Child Adult Care Food
Program• Infant/Toddler
Programming• Strengthening Families• Technical Assistance
on Early Care Issues• Professional
Development• SAC Resources• Child Care Health
Consultation• Family Child Care
Registration
Southern Regional ChildCare Resource Center, EIRC
Monday-Friday 8:30am to 5:00pm
856.582.8282 • www.eirc.org
Parent Name: ____________________________________________________________
Address:_________________________________________ Phone: ________________
Child(ren) Name(s) & Birthdates: ____________________________________________
______________________________________________________________________
If you think you have the cutest kid in town, send a 4x6 photo and a $15 entry fee to P.O. Box 2413, Vineland, NJ 08362-2413.
If your child(ren) is/are selected, we will arrange a FREE professional photo shoot andthey could be on our next cover for all your friends and family to see! Sorry, photos cannot be returned.
Is your child the CUTEST KID IN TOWN?Every month, South Jersey MOMwill feature a local child on the cover!
30 | January 2010 Visit our website and sign up for our e-newsletter
Moorestown Friends School
For more information, call 856-914-4416 or visit www.mfriends.org/campfair
LARGEST CAMP FAIR IN SOUTH JERSEY!
Moorestown Friends School
Summer Camp Fair(serving campers from age 3 - 18)
Saturday, February 611:30 a.m. - 3 p.m. • MFS Field HouseFree Admission • Lunch/refreshments available
Explore over 80 Day and Residential Camps!Service • Academics • Science • Technology
Adventure • Teen Travel • Sports • Performing Arts
MFS is located in the heart of Moorestown at 110 E. Main Street.
SUMMER CAMP GUIDE • SUMMER CAMP GUIDE • SUMMER CAMP GUIDE • SUMMER CAMP GUIDE
MOUNT LAUREL:Open Houses: 1/27, 2/10, 2/25, 3/10, 3/24, 4/14Boys & Girls 3 1/2 yrs-8th grade7a-6p. Lunch, snack & extended care included.$45/day, $39/day sibling rate1 Hovtech Blvd. • Mt. Laurel856.273.2828 • [email protected]
CHERRY HILL:Open Houses: 1/25, 2/16, 3/3, 3/22, 4/7, 4/27Boys & Girls PK-7th grade7a-6p. Lunch, snack & extended care included.$45/day, $39/day sibling rate600 Kresson Road • Cherry Hill856.428.8588 • [email protected]
DEPTFORD:Boys & Girls 4-12. 7a-6p. Lunch, snack & extended care included.510 Deptford Avenue • [email protected]
Offering a variety of sports and activities:• Soccer• Dodgeball• Movie Day• Air Hockey• Kickball• Slip ‘N Slide• Roller Skating
• Basketball• Volleyball• Floor Hockey• Wiffleball• Flag Football• Ultimate Frisbee• Arts & Crafts
• Gaga• Board Games• Game Cube• Field Trips
and Weekly Swimming Trips
$35 registration fee for all 3 locations-camps run from June 22-Sept. 4$10 Off
RegistrationExpires 5/1/10
Come Join in the FUN!ISC Summer Day Campwww.sjsummercamps.com
Celebrating our
8th anniversary
as South Jersey’s
#1 Camp Provider
Great Times Day Camp
www.southjerseymom.com January 2010 | 31
��������� �����Winter Flea MarketFebruary 20, 2010 from 9a-1230p
Located at Cherry Hill Health and Racquet Club1820 Old Cuthbert Road • Cherry Hill
Loads of GENTLY USED and NEWitems on sale at great prices!
Clear out the house and get rid of your stuff! $25 per table, you keep all the money you make!
Name ________________________________________________________________
Phone #________________________________________________________________
Email______________________________ City ________________________________
Items you will be bringing ________________________________________________
______________________________________________________________________
______________________________________________________________________
Mail application with $25 payment to: South Jersey MOM, P.O. Box 2413, Vineland, NJ 08362-2413Call 856.692.MOMS or email [email protected] for more details.
• Toys• Books • Beauty products• Maternity clothes• Women’s Clothing and shoes• Baby and children’s clothing
and shoes• Highchairs, cribs, pack ‘n’ plays,
strollers & car seats • Homemade baked goods and
desserts• Vendors with crafts, jewelry,
candles and more
Entry Fee for Shoppers: Just $1 Supervised activities for your kids while you shop!
SUMMER CAMP GUIDE • SUMMER CAMP GUIDE
SUM
MER
CA
MP
GU
IDE
GREAT TIMES DAY CAMPTwo in-ground pools, a 25 acre lake, tennisand swim lessons, arts & crafts, full sportsprogram. Over 10,000 sq. ft. of air-condi-tioned space. All State Certified teachers ascounselors. Hot lunch, transportation andweekly trips are included - no extra charge.www.greattimesdaycamp.com.
ISC SummerDay Camp
DON’T MISS OUT ON THE FUN!!ISC SUMMER DAY CAMP has excitingfield trips, swimming trips, special guests,games & activities this summer. June 21-Sept 3; Ages 3 1/2-8th Grade; 7a-6p. Lunch included. $45/day (Siblings$39/day). Mt. Laurel, Cherry Hill andDeptford. www.sjsummercamps.com or (856) 273-2828.
SUMMER CAMP GUIDE • SUMMER CAMP GUIDE
GET CLOSE TO NATURE ATCAMP CREEK RUN!50 wooded acres in Marlton, offering certified teachers, sports, arts & nature programs, fishing, boating, swim instruc-tion, archery, hiking trails, basketball, volleyball & gaga courts, challenge course, butterfly house, farm sanctuary & more! Call (856) 596-4250 for more info or visitwww.campcreekrun.com.
� Have at least one son and onedaughter
� Have been a parent for morethan five years
� Good at expressing himself on paper
� Live in South Jersey� Willing to openly share
personal experiences
DAD WANTED!
We are looking for a DAD who would like to write a regularmonthly column about parenthood from a “Dad’s Point of
View.” Applicants must match the following criteria:
Please send an email to [email protected] with bio and reason why you would make a great columnist.
32 | January 2010 Visit our website and sign up for our e-newsletter
Well, it’s that time of year. Teachers have finished
reviewing material and getting the children accli-
mated to their new class and grade. Some chil-
dren may be starting to show stress, resistance or
difficulty learning the new curriculum. These are often sub-
tle indications of covert learning difficulties. If your child
is being taught well, is doing all assignments and attending school
regularly, then academic struggling points to a difficulty in how they
process information.
Talk to your child’s teacher to stay on top of things and get their
feedback. Monitor your child’s progress and problems closely and
do not go more than another marking period to find out what is real-
ly going on for your child. Trust your instincts and do not let anyone
“talk you out of” what your gut is telling you. You know your child
best!
You have the right to request that a comprehensive learning
evaluation be done to determine if your child does have any learn-
ing difficulties. Very often, comments about not paying attention,
failing to get their work done on time or an inability to stay on task
are red flags that may signal learning disabilities.
If you choose to have your child evaluated, here are some
critical suggestions:
First, request an evaluation by sending a letter (not an email) to
the director of your township’s child study team. By law, they are
required to send you a response.
When the meeting has been scheduled, make sure you bring a
friend or preferably an advocate with you. Just as we seek lawyers,
accountants, etc. to help us with important legal issues, so too is this
a legal matter; and unless you are an experienced special education
specialist, you need another objective “set of ears” with you as sup-
port. You will receive a lot of information and your emotions may
interfere with your ability to really hear everything being said.
Tape record all the sessions. This is perfectly legal and there
should not be any problem unless there is something to hide! Again,
write a letter to the appropriate person to inform them that you will
be doing so.
Understanding the process of interpreting diagnostic tests is the
most important piece of information. Most districts still use the
“Discrepancy Model” which is a subjective approach to determining
if a child has a learning disability or not. The criteria are subjective,
vary from town to town and never have been supported by scientif-
ic research or proven to have any correlation to learning disabilities.
The discrepancy is between the Standard IQ score and the academ-
ic achievement scores. Basically, what the Discrepancy Model indi-
cates is if your child is an over achiever who has an unidentified
learning disability or if your child is an underachiever who probably
has a learning disability!
The WISC, WIAT and WJ III are the usual tests used. Through
years of sitting on both sides of the desk, testing children for learn-
ing disabilities and then working directly with them in remediating
learning problems, it has become very clear to me that these tests are
neither comprehensive nor diagnostic enough! They do not test all
the areas proven to be critical to the learning process and the scores
tend to be inflated.
When it comes to testing, insist that
your child have a thorough reading assess-
ment, which must include a reading inven-
tory to be a truly valid assessment.
Audiological assessments and vision eval-
uations are also critical components.
If necessary, request a private evaluation or a second opinion
that includes these tests. Just as you would take your child to a spe-
cialist for a serious illness beyond the treatment of your local pedi-
atrician, you may have to go outside your local school district alone
to diagnose and resolve learning problems.
If you choose to seek an outside opinion, make sure they are not
using the same tests the school district is using and that they are not
using the “Discrepancy Model.”
Make it clear what you want to have tested and, if they cannot
or will not do it, move on until you are satisfied with the answers
you get. Wrightslaw.com is an excellent resource for parents
involved in this process. Best wishes for a successful school year for
your child and you!�Mary Pat Correro is the founder of The Center For Learning Enhancement,LLC. TheCenter resolves learning disabilities through a comprehensive, developmental approachbased on the most current research on the brain and learning. For more info call (856) 234-7337 or visit www.CLEnhancement.com.
If You Suspect aLearning Problem...
By Mary Pat Correro, Ed.M.
lear
ning
2 le
arn
www.southjerseymom.com January 2010 | 33
Do you remember when
you first learned to read?
Scroll back to those earli-
est days of your childhood when
the world seemed simpler and
adults bustled about in your life
seeing to your personal needs…
someone there to tie your shoe and
blow your nose and make sure
food was served at appropriate
times of the day. Clothing worn
one day and muddied in play
would miraculously reappear in your dresser drawers clean and
folded and ready to be worn once again with no effort on your
part. Ahhh . . . remember when?
And at some point, those mysterious marks in neat little rows
on paper stuck between two hard bits of board magically turned
into words when a nearby adult looked at them. It was a mysteri-
ous language that, you were told, you would one day be able to
read for yourself. For a time, the colorful illustrations were
enough of a feast for your eyes and meditations of your heart. But,
oh! To read words!
Enter the obligatory ABC book. Every
child had one. A is for apple. B is for boy. C
is for cat. Each letter accessorized by a
charming picture. For generations, children
have loved their ABC books – the first les-
sons of learning language. Letters have
sounds. Stringing those letters together
makes words. Words have meaning and
convey ideas. Literacy! Magic!
I recommend the literacy and magic of
Green Tiger Press’ nostalgic ABC book,
featuring five renderings of each letter on a
double page spread with illustrations from
five different antique alphabet books circa
19th and early 20th century. The illustra-
tions were culled from the vintage collec-
tions of children’s book illustrations at the
Blue Lantern Studio. How fascinating to
study through the myriad ways the alphabet
has been presented to tender tots. My
favorite is the action alphabet letters: “K is
for kicking” accompanied by a whimsical
letter “K” with face, arms and legs, kicking
a ball in what appears to be a soccer game.
And how about letter “I” for “idle” com-
plete with a moral poem concerning the vice, plus “idle” illustrat-
ed. Character education and reading skills in one! That’s the way
they used to do it. I’m so glad Green Tiger has preserved a sam-
ple of our heritage in language and literacy for the 21st century
child!
Follow-up Activity: This large hardcover edition is a treasure.
Share it one letter at a time and discuss all five renderings. Then
consider how you would present and illustrate the letter. Have
paper and crayons available to visually create your spin on the
ABC’s and preserve them in a binder. Have everyone in the fami-
ly contribute to the task!�
Kathryn Ross is a professional storyteller celebrating the love of learning and literacy with children of all ages. She hosts Tale Spin Stories every Tuesday forpreschoolers at the Cumberland Mall in Vineland. To learn more about Miss Kathyprograms from Pageant Wagon Productions, visit www.pwpstorytellers.com.
By Kathryn Ross, a.k.a. “Miss Kathy”
Tale Spin StoriesRead-to-Me Book Reviews
THEME: First Language Lessons
BOOK: Green Tiger’s Illustrated ABC
AUTHOR: Green Tiger Press
ILLUSTRATOR: Blue Lantern Studio
EAN: 9781595830418
��
Now Enrolling for Preschool Winter Sessions
Celebrating 15Award-Winning
Years!
book review
CLASSESJUMPBUNCH SPORTS & FITNESS FOR KIDSIntroduces sports and fitness to childrenin a non-competitive environment. 18 mos-12 years. Classes improve grossmotor skills, hand/eye coordination,balance, and self-esteem & teamwork.For details contact Jamie (856) 433-8220, [email protected] Askabout our birthday parties & summercamps! www.jumpbunch.com.
ABRAKADOODLE - REGISTER NOW FOR WINTER CLASSES!Get MESSY, be CREATIVE and have FUN! Learn how Abrakadoodle received 7 nods fromNickelodeon’s GoCityKids for “Best Art Program”in 2009. For ages 20 mts-10 yrs. Visit us atwww.abrakadoodle. com/nj01 for class schedule & locations. Questions, call us at (856) 914-0521.
CONSIGNMENT SERVICESBRING DOWN THE COST OF GROWING UP AT KIDSTUFF!KIDSTUFF consignment shop specializes in superior pre-owned clothes for kids. Vast selection of high quality & designer brands,
all in excellent condition at fraction of originalcost. Recycle your child’s “still like-new” clothingback into cash! www.kidstuff.vpweb.com,(856) 589-7171.
FAMILY PHOTOGRAPHERSNOW BOOKING VALENTINES PORTRAITSFamily, children, babies & maternity portraits.Ladies, having a hard time finding that perfectgift? Book a glamour/boudoir portrait sessionand give him, “The Valentines gift only you cangive.” Call (856) 415-1000 or visit www.moorecreativephotography.com or [email protected].
HEATING AND AIR CONDITIONINGLOOKING FOR A RELIABLE, HONEST, AFFORDABLE HEATING CONTRACTOR?Then you’ve found them! For new construction,including custom homes, upgrades, change outsor renovations call RJ Mechanical for all yourHVAC needs. (856) 690-9692.
JOB OPPORTUNITIESRAISE YOUR INCOME WHILE RAISING YOUR FAMILYYou can make extra money without puttingthe kids in daycare. You set your own hours. No billing, no collections, no carrying inventory,
no large investment.Great local support.Call us today at(856) 305-7680.
PARTIES – ADULTCOME H.O.M.E. TO TUPPERWARE! Let us help you be healthier, organized, make nsave money, and better our environment! Waysto bring Tupperware home: In home Parties,book sales, fundraisers or by joining our awesome team! Ed Maher at (856) 616-1515,http://my.tupperwarecom/ed [email protected].
PARTIES – CHILDRENCELEBRATE YOUR SPECIAL DAY WITH CARVELOrder your holiday cakes today. Custom flavorsand designs. Gluten & egg free available. Madefresh daily. Open year round. Mention this adand receive a 15% discount for Jan. Have yournext Party at Carvel! (856) 478-4599.
PEDIATRIC OCCUPATIONAL THERAPY NEED HELP GUIDING YOUR CHILD’S DEVELOPMENTAL JOURNEY? At The Schlinic, happy childhoods are our spe-cialty. Kids come for awesome motor equipment,fun sensory experiences and developmentalplay. Parents come for answers, professionalswho listen, assessments and research-supportedintervention. Learn more at www.schlinic.comor call Dr. Jodi at (856) 692-9292.
WILLS/ESTATE PLANNINGWHO WILL TAKE CARE OF YOUR CHILDREN?Appointing Guardians for your minor children is one of the most important aspects of Estate Planning. Complimentary initial consulta-tion. Mention this ad and receive 15% discount for Jan. Contact James F Fahy, Esq., LLCto learn more. Call (856) 287-3107 or [email protected].
34 | January 2010 Visit our website and sign up for our e-newsletter
reso
urce
gui
de
WANTED:STORIES ABOUT SOUTH JERSEY MOMS!
Do you know a woman who is an inspiration to others? We arelooking for MOMs of all types to interview for future articles.
Below are just some examples of MOMs we want to hear about:
� Parents who have a child with Cerebral Palsy, Austism,Asperger’s, Tourette’s Syndrome,Speech Impairments, severe skindisorders, Spina Bifida, DownSyndrome, Epilepsy or Juvenile Diabetes.
� Foster Parents� Breast Cancer Survivors� Experienced the loss of an
infant/child� Adopted a child� Volunteer in their community/
are a mentor to at-risk children� Military moms
Please send a brief description of a MOM who deserves recognition to [email protected]! Please include all contact information sowe can reach you if chosen.
www.southjerseymom.com January 2010 | 35
For a complete list of events, log ontowww.southjerseymom.com
ATLANTIC COUNTYClimbing Your Family Tree January 11 from 6 to 8 p.m.Introduction to www.ancestry-library.com & www.heritagequest.com. Atlantic County Library System/Buena CommunityReading Room located in BuenaRegional High School, Buena. Opento adults. Registration required (609)625-2776 x 6325. For information(856) 697-4701.
Toddler TalesJanuary 13 at 10:30 a.m.Children ages 2-4 and a caregiverare invited for stories and songs.free. Registration required. Atlantic County Library, 134Philadelphia Ave., Egg Harbor City.(609) 804-1063.
BURLINGTON COUNTYMedford Least Studio ExhibitionJan. 15-Feb. 8 from 11a to 6p (Fri.& Sat) 1 to 5p (Sun)Gifted artists from the Medford Least Studio exhibit their finestworks. Medford Arts Center, 18 N.Main St., Medford. (609) 654-6033 or www.artsinmedford.org.
Winter Subscription ConcertJanuary 17 at 2 p.m.The Philharmonic of Southern New Jersey presents its WinterSubscription Concert featuringinternationally known pianist VedaZuponic. $20 - $25. Philharmonic of Southern New Jersey, Eastern High School, Laurel Oak Rd,Voorhees. (866) 779-2600 orwww.psnj.org.
CAMDEN COUNTYKids Karaoke Night!January 27 from 4:30 to 8:30pMove over American Idol! Kids andtheir families are invited to belt outtheir favorite songs Karaoke-style orjust sing along with Miley, TaylorSwift and the Jonas Brothers. Linedances and surprises, too! The PopShop, 729 Haddon Ave,Collingswood. (856) 869-0111
Splashtastic New Year’s Bash Dec. 31 from 6:30 p.m. to 1 a.m.Admission to Water Park, arcade,hors d’ oeuvres, dinner & dessertbuffet, DJ, kids craft corner. SaharaSam’s Oasis Indoor Water Park, 535N Rt 73, West Berlin. Reservationrequired, (856) 767-7580.
CAPE MAY COUNTYChild Safety Seat Inspections at Burke Motors January 16 from 9 a.m. to 1 p.m.Nationally certified technicians willreview the current seat installationand point out deficiencies, check forrecalls and walk the parent /caregiv-er through the proper installation.Children should be present at timeof inspection. 519 Stone Harbor Blvd,Cape May Ct House. (609) 463-6425.
Yoga at Woodbine Library January 6, 13, 20 & 27 from 3 to 4 p.m.The Cape May County Library isdelighted to offer Yoga classes atWoodbine Public Library. Classes in gymnasium at WoodbineCommunity Center in the library. 800 Monroe St., Woodbine. (609)861-2501 or www.cmclibrary.org.
Wine Pairing DinnerJanuary 15Enjoy a wine pairing dinner at thePeter Shields Restaurant where eachcourse will be paired with a differentwine from Cape May Winery &Vineyard’s current wine selections.Reservations required, (609) 884-9090 or www.capemaywinery.com.
CUMBERLAND COUNTYStory Time for Children Throughout JanuaryBaby story time (age 6-23 months w/adult) on Fridays from 10:30-11a.Toddler story time (age 2 w/adult)on Tuesdays 10:30-11a.Preschool story time (age 3-5 w/adult) Wed and Thurs 10:30-11:15a.Toddler and Preschool Music Timealso available. Call (856) 794-4244 x 4246 for details. RegistrationREQUIRED. Vineland Library, 1058East Landis Ave, Vineland.
Exhibit: Animal AttractionDec 21-March 3Features a juried photography exhi-bition with animals as the subject ofthe photos. Cumberland CountyLibrary, 800 E. Commerce St.,Bridgeton. (856) 453-2210
GLOUCESTER COUNTYThe Frog Prince; Jan. 22 at 10a & Jan. 23 at 10a & 1p.The first in the classic collection ofBrothers Grimm fairytales, The FrogPrince is the story of a spoiledprincess and her unlikely prince.The princess is forced to keep herword to befriend the frog after heretrieves her lost golden ball fromthe spring. Broadway Theatre ofPitman, 43 S. Broadway, Pitman.
(856) 384-8381 or www.pit-manbroadwaytheatre.com.
Nature TotsJanuary 13 at 10 a.m.A special program for pre-schoolers and their caregivers.Explore nature through crafts andthe outdoors. Children must beaccompanied by an adult. Make a winter craft and take a “CabinFever Walk”. Call Jill Taylor, (856) 881-0845.
Powerful You! Women’s NetworkJanuary 21 from 7 to 9:30 p.m.Powerful You! Women’s Network isopen to all women who have an interest in networking/connecting with other women on a business/professional level, light dinner, discussions, relationships. AdelphiaRestaurant, 1750 Clements BridgeRd., Deptford. $25/members andnew attendees; $35 non-members. Contact Shaun Stephenson at (609)560-8370 or [email protected] or www.powerfulyou.com for moreinfo.
SALEM COUNTYChris Smither’s MusicJanuary 30 at 8 p.m.Chris Smither’s music draws asdeeply from the blues as it does from American folk music.Smither considers himself a performer first, though the strengthof his songwriting skills is clear fromthe artists who have covered hissongs – from Bonnie Raitt to theDixie Chicks and Diana Krall. $25.Appel Farm Arts and Music Center,457 Shirley Rd, Elmer. (856) 358-2472
January Calendar
To submit your event, send an email to [email protected]. Entries are due eight weeks prior to the event and are filled on a first come first serve basis. Space is limited.
things 2 do
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Call 856-701-8734 to book your partywww.bonbonsparties.com
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