it’s lonely at the top — top consultant

1/6

news.top-consultant.com

It’s lonely at the top

10-Mar-2014 - Isolation can be a problem for many CEOs and

senior staff says Alan Denton of executive coaching company

The Results Centre. Here, he discusses the importance of

challenge and feedback.

***

With the gloom of recession receding, it would be logical to

assume that many CEOs and directors are enjoying a sense of

relief - even euphoria - at having survived the downturn and

leading their organisations into better times. However, as an

executive coach I come across many MDs and chief officers who

exhibit strong signs of isolation and loneliness. The reality is,

they are crying out for support and challenge: someone to

confide in, who is prepared to stand their corner with

credibility and integrity - and even to confront when necessary.

But, when staff, shareholders and management teams are all

looking to those at the top for answers, who does the CEO turn

to formulate ideas, run through options and get ‘unattached’

feedback and challenge?

Putting on a public face

A major failing of people who hold senior positions is the belief

that they should know all the answers; that demonstrating any

form of weakness or uncertainty is to be avoided at all costs.

http://news.top-consultant.com/It-s-lonely-at-the-top-11109.html


It’s lonely at the top — news.top-consultant.com

2/6

This can make asking for unbiased, non politicised opinions

and feedback difficult.

However, great leaders and managers understand the power of

not knowing all the answers and showing some degree of

vulnerability. They have the confidence to take risks and are

prepared to enter their ‘discomfort zone’. Furthermore, the

principles of ‘servant leader’ and ‘leaders who listen’ are often

difficult, if not impossible, to implement in hierarchical

organisations with an autocratic management style.

Follow the leader

It takes tenacity, knowledge, experience, ability, good timing

and great networks to reach the top of a successful

organisation. It is an appointment as opposed to leadership,

which relies solely on the willingness of others to follow.

Unfortunately, the perception amongst many senior executives

is that they are the leader because they are ‘in charge’- not

because of whom they are being.

How many chief officers or senior executives are either so

isolated or so ‘in charge’ that they become unchallengeable –

they believe in their own power until, of course, they fall off the

sandcastle? How many have confidantes in the business? And

how many are truly challenged and supported to develop a

dynamic and, sometimes, uncomfortable, direction for

themselves and their organisation?

A source of challenge

So, with many CEOs wary of showing weakness to the people

who see themselves as a future CEO, who can they discuss their

fears and hopes with? Colleagues are often scared of giving

honest feedback to their boss for fear that it will interpreted as


3/6

personal criticism. Unfortunately, the same can be said for

many business coaches who can seem more interested in

keeping their job and getting the next meeting than in telling the

sometimes hard-to-hear truth.

Executive coaching can be perceived by some as a failure in

itself. In fact, at the start of the process, many senior executives

I come into contact with have negative perceptions of coaching,

with comments such as:

• Coaching is for failures

• Isn’t coaching about ‘fixing’ something?

• It’s not for me

• It’s fluffy nonsense

• I’ll be seen as weak if I take on a coach

However, the more enlightened senior executives who choose to

embrace coaching often find it invaluable. At its most basic

level, it provides someone to talk to on a level and in confidence

- but it can be so much more than that.

Coaching in action

In 2008/9, as the recession took hold, we worked with a

managing director who ran a successful multi million pound

business. Although confident on the surface, honest

conversation revealed his uncertainties about the future,

particularly with regards to leading the business through the

recession. However, the process of external coaching enabled

him to look at his business (and more importantly, his people),

in a new way. As a company, they chose to change the

‘conversation’ they were having, both internally amongst


4/6

themselves and externally with clients, suppliers and

stakeholders. As a consequence, the company powered their

way through the downturn. The MD recognised the importance

of being able to communicate honestly, saying in his feedback, “I

had no one to turn to internally, I needed that shake and the

results have been fantastic.” In the hands of the right coach, and

with a client who is willing to step into real possibilities that

can emerge, business stars can truly become superstars.

Executive coaching should have a clear ethos, but not a pre-

determined process. It’s about digging in, challenging and

exploring the possibilities and then stretching those

possibilities. Applying a fixed model or process can be stifling

and prescriptive.

What to look for

So, if you feel that you would benefit from the challenge and

(sometimes tough) feedback that a coach can offer, you should

look for someone who has a clear ethos for his or her coaching

that encompasses the following:

• An understanding of the need for external coaches to be a

sounding board, a confidant – a ‘critical friend’ – one that often

does not exist for most senior executives.

• A clear definition of confidentiality and integrity. Check out

what this means in practice, particularly if there is a third party

stakeholder in place, i.e. what, if anything, is being reported

back? This should be determined by mutual agreement between

the coach and the coachee. Ideally, the results that third parties

see, hear and experience in their interactions with the client

under coaching will speak for themselves.


5/6

• The need for an agreement of clear outcomes – with an

expectation that these will be bettered. A good coach is not

attached to further meetings although they may agree a series of

coaching interventions.

• Someone who stands for you, the client, achieving an amazing

outcome as designed by you - but is absolutely prepared to

stretch and challenge you, often to a place of discomfort.

• If you are a CEO, look for someone who has had that

experience - but not necessarily in your sector.

A great executive coach will push, pull and support in equal

measure and comes from a place of ruthless compassion. They

will also be happy to discuss ROI.

Feelings of loneliness isolation are both common and

counterproductive in business – as in many other areas of life.

However, CEOs and senior executives have the ability to break

down barriers of inaccessibility. They may have to take a long,

hard look at the way they manage processes and people – to be

prepared to receive hard feedback and admit vulnerability.

However, the right external, impartial support can make the

whole process easier and more likely to succeed. There may be

some discomfort along the way, but the results can truly be

amazing.

About the author:

Alan Denton is MD of executive coaching company The Results

Centre ( www.theresultscentre.com). Alan regularly coaches

CEOs and senior executives across a range of sectors including

pharmaceuticals, retail, manufacturing, recruitment,

http://www.theresultscentre.com/


6/6

engineering, financial services, property and the legal sector. He

has created several leadership and transformational

programmes, including the First 101 Days Programme.

Original URL:


it’s lonely at the top — top consultant

Documents