its a sign: unbelieveable signs from scotland and beyond
TRANSCRIPT
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ITS A SIGN!UNBELIEVABLE SIGNS FROM SCOTLAND AND BEYOND
Edited by Ken Smith
BLACK & WHITE PUBLISHING
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First published 2012
by Black & White Publishing Ltd
29 Ocean Drive, Edinburgh EH6 6JL
1 3 5 7 9 10 8 6 4 2 12 13 14 15
ISBN: 978 1 84502 419 2
Copyright Ken Smith & Newsquest
(Herald & Times) Ltd 2012
The right of Ken Smith & Newsquest
(Herald & Times) to be identified as
the author of this work has been
asserted by them in accordance withthe Copyright, Designs and Patents
Act 1988.
All rights reserved. No part of this
publication may be reproduced,
stored in a retrieval system, or
transmitted in any form, or by any
means, electronic, mechanical,
photocopying, recording orotherwise, without permission in
writing from the publisher.
A CIP catalogue record for this book
is available from the British Library.
Designed by Richard Budd Design
Printed and bound in Poland
www.hussarbooks.pl
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CONTENTS
Introduction iv
1. Scottish Dialects 1
2. Scotland 293. More From Abroad 65
4. Other Signs 83
5. Make Us Laugh Then 97
6. Finally 107
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INTRODUCTION
Its a strange phenomenon that,
as the ability to take instant
photographs with small digital
cameras and many mobile phoneshas increased, the number of
photographs of the Loch Ness
Monster and alien spacecraft has
decreased. Perhaps the lochs
creature and the visitors from other
planets have suddenly becomecamera-shy.
However, one area that has benefited
from this rise in instant photography
is the Diary column in The Herald
newspaper. In the past readers
would describe an amusing sign orview and end the description with
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the phrase, If only I had a camera
with me. Now almost all of us have
become instant photographers by
simply reaching into a pocket fora mobile phone, pointing it, and
taking a snap. Nor do we need to
know what an f-stop is in a cameras
aperture scale. Point the phone or
digital camera, press a button and
thats it.The only time you hear f-stop
nowadays is when a Glasgow drunk
is making enquiries about where he
can catch a bus.
So for years nowThe Herald
s Diarycolumn has been recording the
daft signs, mis-spellings, and visual
oddities sent in by our generous
readers who have indeed reached for
that phone or camera.
Thank you to all our readers for their
help. Here are a few of the more
popular ones.
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SCOTTISH DIALECTS 1
CHAPTER 1
SCOTTISH DIALECTS
Scots may speak the Queen's English - sometimes - but that doesn't
stop them from wandering off into their own dialects, slang, and
pronunciations. Thus it may seem perfectly acceptable in South
Africa to have a bank called Nedbank, but to visiting Scots it conjuresup pictures of skinny wee pasty-faced individuals in Burberry caps
drinking bottles of Buckie while depositing their giro cheques.
Here are some other examples of pictures that only make Scots laugh.
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2 SCOTTISH DIALECTS
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SCOTTISH DIALECTS 3
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4 SCOTTISH DIALECTS
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SCOTTISH DIALECTS 5
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6 SCOTTISH DIALECTS
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SCOTTISH DIALECTS 7
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8 SCOTTISH DIALECTS
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SCOTTISH DIALECTS 9
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10 SCOTTISH DIALECTS
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