ISSUE 6, NINTH EDITION! ! FEBRUARY 22, 2014

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The Daily DelegateThank You!

By Antonia Tomljanovic

This morning’s debate centered around whether or not to intervene and establish a secular government. Although North Korea and the Holy See were absent this morning, shots were still fired with a special focus on the USA. The working papers were being presented, but in a shocking turn of events, the most well-liked resolution with 14 signatories and three sponsors was created by North Korea, China, and Cuba.  It motioned for the entirety of the Middle East to be occupied by the three sponsor nations and for the Middle East to become completely communist.  China threatened to put nuclear submarines along the coast of the United States to prevent any intervention, to which the United States replied “we have the largest navy in the world.  I’d like to see you try!”  Botswana commented that “This sounds like the greatest idea ever! How could it possibly fail?”  Additionally, when Israel asked “how are [the sponsors] going to save communism when [they] can’t even keep their communist poster up?”, the reply was that they would “float on the oil of the middle east.”  Meanwhile the delegate of South Africa was quietly singing “Why can’t we be friends.”  An interruption occurred, as many countries threatened severe consequences for their delegates not acting in accordance with their foreign policies. Some consequences included revoked economic support for travel expenses, and even exile to the far reaches of the world.

The final verdict was that...well, there was no final verdict.  No decision was reached, as all three resolutions failed.  Ah well.  Business as usual for the DISEC council.

Breaking news! History has not been made!

By Alexia Walsh and Sophia Schoen

Is that even legal?Siyi Wang

China's proposed resolution began the long tug of war between the alliances in the UN. The draft included non-governmental board monitoring international patent requests in which a two third majority is needed, while national patent requests are to be granted within national borders. The patent time was shortened to 10 years, with no patents on naturally occurring genes and an international fund to support companies with successful experiments.

Another resolution proposed by Cuba was more restrictive on the issuing of patents. The situation grew one-sided as USA, Czech Republic, Thailand and Russia showed a strong support for China. However, the delegation from Korea DPR questioned how China, a communist country, could issue a “imperialistic” resolution and side with USA. This challenge was seconded by the delegation from Italy and such accusations were denied by the USA.

As delegates left the room to work on the resolutions, the mood lightened after the motion to discuss the unification of all countries in Africa into 'Chadfrica' was passed. The unification was strongly supported by Chad and Korea DPR, while South Africa showed no interest of joining the unification. The atmosphere in the room was pushed to a peak as the delegate from Botswana suggested war on South Africa after the unification of Africa and the delegate of Chad and several other African delegates left to organize the resolution for 'Chadfrica'.

The topics then turned to issues such as: the roles countries play when there is an alien invasion, whether or not the delegate of North Korea should leave the room, why the Olympics should never be held in Russia again, and dance moves that happened at the party last night. The delegate of Oman then demonstrated his excellent dance skills and was joined by other delegates such as Columbia, Korea DPR and a dias advisor.  While the resolution on patents failed, the resolution creating a unified Africa including Haiti and annexing South Africa ‘Chafrica’ was still being debated when this article was sent to the press.

Let’s get stoned!By LOUISE ZHANG

UNODC - If you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em! This morning, the delegates of Israel, Botswana, and Belgium proposed the unfortunately failed bill, “Operation Crack is Wack” to eliminate the issue of drug trafficking in Central and Southern America while combating the international epidemic of obesity creating a “healthier and more productive” population. This solution will be performed through the assembly of police and military forces of the UN and Central and Southern America to “seize as much illegal cocaine as possible from their illegal owners.” These drugs will then be sold, generating profit for the UN, to the United States of America. As one of the many side effects of cocaine is a loss of appetite, the mandatory use of cocaine will cause a nationwide weight loss. If successful, this cocaine initiative will be spread to the other countries.Not surprisingly, this was followed by an animated question and answer session. “Are you saying you are going to give babies crack?” questioned Best Korea.“When you were writing this bill, were you on cocaine?” asked a concerned Canada.“The knowledge of cocaine [among this committee] is disturbing,” commented the DIAS.

Security Council as always, Veto Crazy

By Tara Jacklin

of the current Syrian government, and have pledged to veto the bill if the cause remains. The other countries are in an uproar as they face the very real threat of having no resolution passed this year. Clause 1 also presents an issue for countries because some nations desired an unarmed force as they would be more neutral, while other countries wanted an armed force since they believed it to be more effective. After merging the two working papers, the presentation of the bill saw a great divide within the committee. During the presentation, two signatories revealed they had wished to be removed and were not. In addition, when the discussion regarding the UN peacekeepers arose, there was disagreement between the sponsors on whether this force was unarmed or not. It was finally worked out to be an unarmed force.

With the allowance of clause by clause voting, Russia was able to veto the clause, and the bill took on a rather sparse look when the other countries had also gotten their vetoes in.

Security Council doesn’t seem to understand or care about the power of the permanent five’s veto power. It looks grim as Russia takes a stubborn position on the first clause which states that 300 armed UN peacekeepers would be sent to Syria to aid humanitarian efforts. Russia is pushing to veto this clause as they are in full support

Thank you everyone for a great conference. Please be sure to thank your fellow press delegates who did a phenomenal job writing the articles for the Daily Delegate. Hope to see you all next year!

ISSUE 6, NINTH EDITION! ! FEBRUARY 22, 2014

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FInal day in WTOBy VISESHA DRONAMRAJU

This morning, the World Health Organization’s session regarding organ trafficking resumed. Delegates got off to a slow start as they were still distressed from last night's festivities. Discussions formed around organ cloning, opt-out systems, education strategies and new technologies. Meanwhile, Somalia, Germany, and Spain mysteriously conjoined to have one delegate representing them. As discussion grew thin, delegates began doing the Harlem Shake. After a plan was formed, the WHO council, led by China, shook their way into DISEC's debate. Finishing their Harlem shake, WHO delegates quickly escaped, leaving DISEC in awe and confusion. Jumping into discussion, Sweden brought forth the idea of synthetic organs as a "safer" option compared to black market organ trafficking. Following this, a delegate suffered a "heart attack" but was then luckily saved by a conveniently placed synthetic option. Somalia expressed that death should not be heard in the WHO council, and if delegates must, then they should do it outside. South Africa then proposed the idea of educating the public on health consequences, noting that organ donors living in impoverished conditions wouldn't have healthy organs anyways. Somalia then suggested that Korea DPR should fund concerts to raise awareness for organ trafficking. The delegate of Australia also noted that education was unnecessary and more focus should be put on the international sharing of data. With so many ideas circling in the council, it will be interesting to observe the developments of the WHO.

Who’s Doing What?By Gabriella Dunn and Isabella Ng

The last day in WTO began by spending time trying to pass two resolutions. The delegates motioned to extend the unmoderated caucus a numerous times to discuss their resolutions. As the delegates continued on, the dais staff declined any further motions of extending the unmoderated caucus. Also, the staff were furious at the delegates for declaring war on each other and even stated, “No wars in WTO. If you guys declare war on each other I am going to be really mad”. Following a discussion pertaining to their second topic of managing sovereign debt and foreign aid post-2008, the delegates presented Resolution 2.0 sponsored by United Arab Emirates, Bahrain, Guatemala, followed by a presentation of Resolution 2.1. Sponsors of the 2.0 resolution objected that resolution 2.1 had 5 sponsors, when Resolution 2.0 was restricted from having more than 3 sponsors. Due to this disapproval, some of the countries had to withdraw from sponsoring resolution 2.1 leaving People’s Republic of China, Iraq and France as sponsors after alterations. Capturing their good times and gracious smiles, the delegates from North Korea, Cuba and Norway presented Resolution 2.2 to have multinational corporations like Walmart present in their country as well. Voting on the resolutions occurred, though all three resolutions failed. However, the delegates became upset and slightly embarrassed at the prospect of not passing a resolution at all and started to prepare another one. Hopefully WTO has a successful resolution!

Upon resuming session this morning, an announcement was made by the chair of the Historical committee. Violent outbreaks took place in the streets of Rwanda, leaving thirty-two Tutsi civilians dead. Finally after two days of debate, there were two working papers in process. The delegates of France, Spain and China worked together to get Rwanda into the resolution for a humanitarian approach. On the other hand, Nigeria, DPR Brazil and USA drafted a paper to present a more direct approach in presenting peace, as they said “instead of standing around for something to happen”. As for Rwanda, they are leaning towards the resolution 1.1 because it meets their best interests. They felt that the direct approach paper would affect the sovereignty of Rwanda.

After having plenty of opportunity to discuss both working papers, draft resolution 1.0 was presented. The Q&A period presented the chance for those strongly supporting resolution 1.0 to cheer on their like-minded friends: “the delegate of Belgium would like to ask, why is this resolution so awesome?”. The mandate presented was met with some criticism and was fittingly named UNPOPULAR, United Nations Protection of Persons UniLateral Around Rwanda. The presentation of resolution 1.1 was presented immediately after. This resolution focused much more on the sovereignty and will of Rwanda and implicating military intervention sparingly. “Peace is good, basically” as explained by Spain.Unfortunately, none of these papers passed due to the Permanent five’s VETO power. Literally EVERYONE used their VETO power. Why, just why...The committee ended in a discussion of the best dressed delegate in council. Great work, delegates.

Historical Council: Hitting no birds with two stones

By Amy Hua and melanie liu

“Yes it is true I am a prisoner, a prisoner of love.” -France“Nigeria is not corrupt” -Nigeria“*cough cough* Tiananmen square” -Belgium (in a snide remark to China)“do you even kiwi bro” -New Zealand“you don’t wanna hear this, you’re gonna have post-traumatic stress disorder” -Morocco

QUOTES!