Introduction to Technical Style

TECM 4180Dr. Lam

What are we doing today?

• 3:30-3:45 – Diagnostic exercise

• 3:45-3:55 – Three volunteers to share their revisions

• 3:55-4:30 – Technical style lecture and practice exercises

• 4:30- 4:40 – Assign technical style homework

• 4:40-4:50 – Questions

Let’s try something…

• Write an email to your friend telling them that you have to cancel dinner plans.

• Now write an email to your professor telling her that you will not make it to class.

Three considerations, One Goal

1. Constructing sentences

2. Choosing words

3. Choosing a voice

Goal of technical writing: Choose a style that is best-suited to your reader’s needs.

Constructing Sentences

1. Simplify your sentences

2. Put the action in your verbs

3. Use the active voice unless you have a good reason to use passive

4. Emphasize what’s important

5. Vary your sentence length and structure (not covered in class, please read about it in Anderson)

Guideline 1: Simplify your sentences

Research-based principle: Reading is hard work done primarily by short-term memory.

1. Eliminate unnecessary words

2. Place modifiers next to the words they modify

3. Combine short sentences

Place modifiers next to the words they modify

• Short-term memory relies on word order to indicate meaning. If you don’t keep related words together, your sentence may say something different from what you mean.

• Mandy found many undeposited checks in the file cabinets, which were worth over $41,000.

• The HR department asked her on Tuesday to return the contract.

Combine short sentences

• Reduces words and helps readers see relationships among points

• Water quality in Hawk River declined in March. This decline occurred because of the heavy rainfall that month. All the extra water overloaded Tomlin County’s water treatment plant.

Guideline 2: Put the action in your verbs

• Overuse of “to be”

• Remove expletive structures

• Remove nominals

Overuse of main verb“to be”

• Forms of “to be”

• Main verb is always right-most verb• Management tends to be uncooperative.• Management could have been more cooperative.

• Main verb “be” is often followed by a noun, adjective, or prepositional phrase. These words can sometimes replace “to be”

• Determine what part of speech follows the main verb “be” and find a more specific verb.

Am Be Being Was

Are Been Is Were

Practice:

Locate the verb-form “to be” and revise to make it more concise.

• The administration is supportive of our program.

• This information could be of benefit to the students.

• This report is an analysis of the problem.

Expletive Structures

• Begins with “There” or “It”• “There was”, “it is”, “there could be”, etc.

• “There” or “It” is the subject of sentence

• Look for a stronger subject following the expletive

Practice:

Locate the expletive structure. Revise for conciseness.

• It is necessary for users to back-up all contents of their websites.

• It is the purpose of this manual is to discuss the use of Wordpress as a content management system.

• There will be seven sections in this manual that describe the overall management of your website.

Nominals

• Nouns derived from verbs• -ance, -ence, -ion, or –ment

• Maintain

• Recommend

• Achieve

Practice

Locate the nominal and revise for conciseness.

• This manual contains a discussion of content management systems.

• The inclusion of a recommendation for your computer’s minimal technical requirements is found in this manual on page 17.

Caveat about conciseness

• Watch out for meaning• The article includes a discussion of methods

for retention • The article discusses retention

• Watch out for tone, especially in negative messages• The application deadline passed last week on

February 1st. • You missed the February 1st deadline.

Guideline 3: Use active unless you have a good reason for passive

• Active voice can focus your sentences on specific actions and actors

• Use active to emphasize the agent

• Use passive to emphasize the patient

Passive vs. Active Voice

• Based on thematic roles of agent and patient• Agent: Doer of the action• Patient: Receiver of action

• Related to syntactic position • Subject: First noun phrase in the main clause of

a sentence• Direct Object: noun phrase following the main

verb

Identifying active and passive structures

ACTIVE VOICE CONSTRUCTION

THEMATIC ROLE: AGENT ACTION PATIENT

SYNTACTIC POSITION:

SUBJECT VERB OBJECT

John wrote the manual

PASSIVE VOICE CONSTRUCTION

THEMATIC ROLE: PATIENT ACTION AGENT

SYNTACTIC POSITION:

SUBJECT VERB OBJECT

The manual was written by John.

Other ways to identify voice

• Passive must follow this formula:• “to be” + past participle • The manual was written by John.

• Past participles are past tense verbs that usually end in –en or –ed

Practice- Active or passive?

• Customers have been writing several letters of complaint.

• Items have been ripped off from customers.

• Customers have been ripped off.

• Customers have been ripping off items.

• Complaint letters were written.

Choosing active and passive voice• Active for conciseness • Removes form of “to be” and “by” phrase• Letters have been written by customers – (5 words)• Customers wrote letters (3 words)

• Active to focus on Agent• John made several mistakes.

• Use passive to focus on patient• Agentless passive• Mistakes were made.

• Use passive to describe generalizable actions or results• Today, faster processers are used in computers.

Guideline 4: Emphasize what’s important

• Place key information at the end of the sentence

• Place key information in the main clause

• Emphasize key information typographically

• Tell readers explicitly were key information is

Place key information at the end of the sentence

• Last month, he topped his sales quota even though he was sick for an entire week.

Original: The department’s performance has been superb in all areas.

Revised: ???

Place key information in the main clause

• If your sentence has more than one clause, place key information in the main clause

• Main (independent) clauses can stand alone as a sentence

• Subordinate (dependent) clauses are sentence fragments and often begin with relative pronouns (e.g., who, which, that) or subordinate conjnctions (e.g., although, after).

Original: Although our profits were up, our productivity was down.

Revised: ???

Emphasize key information typographically

• Emphasize by bolding, italics, small caps, etc.

• Be careful not to overdo it

• SUBJECT: PLEASE READ- VERY IMPORTANT

Tell readers explicitly what the key information is

• Use explicit markers to tell readers what is important

• Creative writing often discourages explicit markers. However, technical writing encourages these markers.

• E.g., In this proposal, I will cover three important issues: 1) cost of healthcare; 2) implementation of healthcare, and 3) quality of healthcare

Guideline 5: Vary your sentence length and structure

• Repetitive length and structure can lead to monotony and can remove the ability to emphasize major points

• Vary your sentence length • Shorter sentence that follows longer sentences

can be a point of emphasis

• Vary your structure• Use introductory clauses (conjunctive adverbs and

other transition words)• Active and passive voice

Selecting Words

1. Use concrete, specific words

2. Use specialized terms when, and only when, your readers will understand them

3. Use words accurately

4. Choose plain words over fancy words

5. Choose words with appropriate associations

Guideline 1: Use concrete, specific words

• Words can be abstract or concrete, or anywhere in between• E.g., animal > mammal > dog > labrador retriever

• Because technical communication often relies on the audience reacting in some tangible way (making a decision, performing an action, etc.), using concrete words is essential.

Original: The cost of some materials has risen recently.

Revised: The cost of the bonding agent has tripled in three months.

Guideline 2: Use specialized terms only when your readers will

understand them

• Specialized terms can convey precise, technical meanings economically. Many terms have no exact equivalent in everyday speech. • E.g., MySQL Database

• They help you establish credibility

• They shouldn’t be used if the audience won’t understand them

Defining terms for your readers

• Provide a synonym• E.g., On a boat, a rope or cord is called a line.

• Give a description• E.g., The exit gate consists of two arms that hold a jug while it

is being painted and then allow it to proceed down the production line.

• Make and analogy• E.g., An atom is like a miniature solar system.

• Give a classical definition (provide group and distinguishing characteristics)• E.g., A crystal is a solid in which the atoms or molecules are

arranged in a regularly repeated pattern.

Practice: Definitions

Visit the below links and identify the various definition strategies. Evaluate how well the authors defined terms for their audiences:

http://turntablelab.com/pages/beginners-guide-to-turntables

http://www.artofmanliness.com/2012/11/09/a-beginners-guide-to-buying-your-first-turntable/

Guideline 3: Use words accurately

• Be aware of misused words• E.g., infer vs. imply; accept vs. except; affect

vs. effect

• Consult a dictionary and/or reference when in doubt

Guideline 4: Choose plain words over fancy ones

• Verbs are a common place this occurs (see page 279)• E.g., Ascertain vs. find out

• Plain words promote efficient reading

• Plain words reduce your risk of creating a bad impression • E.g., Ambulation deters cardiac arrest

Guideline 5: Choose words with appropriate associations

• Connotations – All words have connotation, but pay special attention to verbs• High value vs. low value modal verbs• High: You should send me the file• Low: You could send me the file

• Flexible words vs. stiff words• Flexible: ask, should• Stiff: must, require

• Register- Linguistic term to identify or associate words with specific kinds of words• E.g., Sales and marketing register – You’ll love this

product and its low, low price.