Intra-paragraph Organization for ESL Writers

Dr. Linda Bergmann, Professor of English, Purdue

Review

You’ll recognize the following paragraph from the last consulting session…

Why is this easy to read?

Business school professors perennially debate over

whether maintaining an old employee is more costly

than hiring a new one. The issue has strong proponents on

each side. Human resource experts maintain that keeping

an old employee requires fewer man hours for training and

orientation. However, management gurus insist

that having the right person in the right position increases

the overall productivity of a team or workgroup. Between

these two groups are the economists who study new hiring

practices in a company-specific context.

The Given-New Method

Business school professors perennially debate over

whether maintaining an old employee is more costly

than hiring a new one. The issue has strong proponents on

each side. Human resource experts maintain that keeping

an old employee requires fewer man hours for training and

orientation. However, management gurus insist

that having the right person in the right position increases

the overall productivity of a team or workgroup. Between

these two arguments are the economists who study new hiring practices in a company-specific context.

new information = red old information = blue

Another Reasons It’s Readable:

In addition to having a given-new sentence structure, the paragraph uses the T-R-I method for inter-sentence organization. T-R-I is the organizational method used for paragraph organization in most academic essays.

T-R-I stands for:

Topic

Restriction

Illustration

Topic Sentence

Show me the topic!

Native English readers are accustomed to reading a paragraph’s main idea in the first sentence. The topic sentence should generalize the content of the proceeding sentences and provide some forecasting on where the paragraph is headed. Take another look at our example paragraph:

Topic Sentence Example

Business school professors perennially debate over

whether maintaining an old employee is more costly

than hiring a new one. The issue has strong proponents on

each side. Human resource experts maintain that keeping

an old employee requires fewer man hours for training and

orientation. However, management gurus insist

that having the right person in the right position increases

the overall productivity of a team or workgroup. Between

these two groups are the economists who study new hiring

practices in a company-specific context.

Topic Sentence

Notice the reciprocal relationship between the topic sentence and the rest of the paragraph. The first sentence forecasts the content of the proceeding sentences and the proceeding sentences develop the content of the topic sentence.

Topic Sentence Example

The time a person spends preparing for a project willnever go wasted. What will be wasted is the time peoplespend correcting mistakes in a poorly-planned project. Inher book, Success Step-by-Step, efficiency expertCaroline Jefferson says, “The old adage is true: mostpeople who fail to plan plan to fail.” Poorly-planned projects leave people wondering how they should proceed, so they spend their time addressing small details instead of working on big issues. At the end of the project, they have no time, lots of stress, and, considering

the hours they’ve spent on the project, little to show for it.

Topic Sentence

Restriction

Restrict your topic!

Restrictive sentences narrow the topicsentence and transition to the following sentences, which provide specific examples of what you’re discussing. Take another look at theexample paragraph:

Restriction Example

The time a person spends preparing for a project willnever go wasted. What will be wasted is the time peoplespend correcting mistakes in a poorly-planned project. Inher book, Success Step-by-Step, efficiency expertCaroline Jefferson says, “The old adage is true: mostpeople who fail to plan plan to fail.” Poorly-planned projects leave people wondering how they should proceed, so they spend their time addressing small details instead of working on big issues. At the end of the project, they have no time, lots of stress, and, considering

the hours they’ve spent on the project, little to show for it.

Topic Sentence Restrictive Sentence

Notice how the second sentence clarifies the content of the first. The second sentence establishes a limit on the things “not wasted” at the end of the first sentence.

Illustration

Illustrate your topic!

Illustrations give examples that develop the idea established by thetopic and restrictive sentences. They provide evidence, a series of events, or related facts to support the assertion at the beginning of the paragraph.

Illustration Example

The time a person spends preparing for a project willnever go wasted. What will be wasted is the time peoplespend correcting mistakes in a poorly-planned project. Inher book, Success Step-by-Step, efficiency expertCaroline Jefferson says, “The old adage is true: mostpeople who fail to plan plan to fail.” Poorly-planned projects leave people wondering how they should proceed, so they spend their time addressing small details instead of working on big issues. At the end of the project, they have no time, lots of stress, and, considering

the hours they’ve spent on the project, little to show for it.

Topic Sentence Restrictive Sentence

Each of the sentences in blue gives published, anecdotal, or speculative evidence for the idea established in the topic and restrictive sentences.

Illustrations

Topic, Restriction, Illustration

T-R-I paragraphs are usually structured one of two ways:

T-R-I-I-I T-R-I-I-RTopic Topic

Restriction RestrictionIllustration

IllustrationIllustration

IllustrationIllustration

Restriction

T-R-I-I-I Example

The time a person spends preparing for a project willnever go wasted. What will be wasted is the time peoplespend correcting mistakes in a poorly-planned project. Inher book, Success Step-by-Step, efficiency expertCaroline Jefferson says, “The old adage is true: mostpeople who fail to plan plan to fail.” Poorly-planned projects leave people wondering how they should proceed, so they spend their time addressing small details instead of working on big issues. At the end of the project, they have no time, lots of stress, and, considering the hours they’ve spent on the project, little to show for it.

Topic Sentence Restrictive Sentence

Illustrations

T-R-I-I-R Example

Never before had the world known a thinker like Sir Issac Newton. He prompted a revolution in mathematics that still influences the way scientists think about empirical world. In 1687, he published Principia Mathematica, which explains his laws of motion and his law of universal gravitation. As he developed these laws, he also developed calculus, a math system that is still taught to mathematics and science students. ThoughNewton’s ideas were similar to those of other mathematicians of his era, his writing is more elegant, so he is usually credited as a revolutionary genius.

Topic Sentence Restrictive Sentence

IllustrationsRestrictive Sentence

Two Systems of OrganizationNotice how Given-New and T-R-I function at once!

new information = red old information = blue

Topic Sentence Restrictive Sentence

Restrictive SentenceIllustrations

Business school professors perennially debate over

whether maintaining an old employee is more costly

than hiring a new one. The issue has strong proponents on

each side. Human resource experts maintain that keeping

an old employee requires fewer man hours for training and

orientation. However, management gurus insist

that having the right person in the right position increases

the overall productivity of a team or workgroup. Between

these two arguments are the economists who study new

hiring practices in a company-specific context.

Practice Example

1) The results showed that cohesive and easy-to-finish concrete can be produced using ternary binders.

2) We produced 16 different concretes (including one control,cement-only mixture) in the laboratory and tested for fresh properties, compressive and flexural strength.

3) The ANOVA statistical analysis of the results indicate that paste and fly ash content are the only variables which significantly influence 7-day flexural strength.

4) However, the increase in comprehensive strength of all ternary mixtures was significantly higher than that of control mixture, which clearly indicates the strength contribution from pozzolanic reaction.

5) The influence of variables tested was less pronounced in the case of comprehensive strength data.

Re-order these sentences to follow the T-R-I format.

Practice Answer

We produced 16 different concretes (including one control, cement-only mixture) in the laboratory and tested for fresh properties, compressive and flexural strength. The results showed that cohesive and easy-to-finish concrete can be produced using ternary binders. The ANOVA statistical analysis of the results indicate that paste and fly ash content are the only variables which significantly influence 7-day flexural strength. The influence of variables tested was less pronounced in the case of comprehensive strength data. However, the increase in comprehensive strength of all ternary mixtures was significantly higher than that of control mixture, which clearly indicates the strength contribution from

pozzolanic reaction.

Topic Sentence Restrictive Sentence

Restrictive Sentence Illustrations

Practice Example

1) As a first step, a full quadratic (or linear) model is assumed, and significance tests (t-tests) are performed on each model coefficient [7, 8, 9].

2) We analyzed the data with factorial designmethodology (including CCD method).

3) Since a complete set of data needed for such analysis was not available at the time this paper was prepared, the presented analysis is limited to visual interpretation of observed trends and statistical analysis of variance (ANOVA).

4) The method consists of iterative development of the model that best fits the measured responses.

5) Although this analysis considered the effects of independent variables (namely fly ash, slag and paste content), it did not include the effects of interactions between variables on the measured responses.

Re-order these sentences to follow the T-R-I format.

Practice Answer

We analyzed the data with factorial design methodology (including

CCD method). The method consists of iterative development of the

model that best fits the measured responses. As a first step, a full

quadratic (or linear) model is assumed, and significance tests (t-tests)

are performed on each model coefficient [7, 8, 9]. Since a complete

set of data needed for such analysis was not available at the time this

paper was prepared, the presented analysis is limited to visual

interpretation of observed trends and statistical analysis of variance

(ANOVA). Although this analysis considered the effects of

independent variables (namely fly ash, slag and paste content), it did

not include the effects of interactions between variables on the

measured responses.

Topic Sentence Restrictive Sentence

Illustrations

Adapted by Joshua Prenosil and Linda Bergmann from The Thomson Handbook

by David Blakesley and Jeffrey L. Hoogeveen

For More Information

• Contact the Purdue Writing Lab:– Drop In: Heavilon 226– Call: 765-494-3723– Email: owl@owl.english.purdue.edu

– On the web: http://owl.english.purdue.edu