I’mAnxious!25REASONSYOUHAVEANXIETY–ANDWHATYOUCANDOABOUTIT

CarlVernon

Copyright©2018CarlVernonAllrightsreserved.Nopartofthispublicationmaybereproduced,distributed,ortransmitted,inanyformorbyanymeans,includingphotocopying,recording,orotherelectronicormechanicalmethods,withoutthepriorwrittenpermissionofthepublisher,exceptinthecaseofbriefquotationsembodiedincriticalreviewsandcertainothernon-commercialusespermittedbycopyrightlaw.FirsteditionAllthematerialprovidedinI’mAnxious!isforinformationoreducationalpurposesonly.Noneofthecontentisintendedtobeasubstituteforprofessionalmedicaladvice,diagnosisortreatment.Youshouldconsultyourdoctorbeforedecidingtotakeanyactionrelatingtoanysymptomsormedicalconditions.Donotwithdrawfromorpartakeinanyprogrammeorexercisewithoutfirstconsultingyourdoctor.I’mAnxious!anditsassociatedproductsareforadultuseonly,andanyinformationpassedontominorsmustbetheresponsibilityanddecisionofalegalguardian.

Findmoreadviceonanxietyat:

www.carlvernon.com

&

www.anxietyrebalance.com

OtherbooksbyCarlVernon

AnxietyRebalance:AlltheAnswersYouNeedtoOvercomeAnxietyand

Depression

AnxietyRebalance:AlltheAnswersForTeens

Contents#1:You’relookingforacure.............................................2#2:Yourfocusisoff...............................................................4#3:Youliveintheworldof‘whatif…?’.........................6#4:Worryinghasbecomeabadhabit...........................8#5:You’vestoppedtakingaction..................................10#6:Fightorflightisbeingabused.................................12#7:Youdon’thaveto..........................................................14#8:Youfearthefear............................................................16#9:‘Autopilot’isswitchedoff..........................................18#10:You’redependentonsomething.........................20#11:There’snothingleftinthetank............................22#12:Thepastandfuturesupersedethepresent....24#13:Youhaveagift.............................................................26#14:Youdon’ttakerisks..................................................28#15:Youlivewithinyourcomfortzone.....................30#16:Avoidancegivesyoucomfort................................32#17:Youhaven’tgottotherealcause........................34#18:Youhavenoroutine..................................................36

#19:You’rebreathingintoxicfumes...........................38#20:You’velostyourpurpose........................................40#21:Yourfoundationsareunstable.............................42#22:You’rebeingbullied..................................................44#23:Youliketobeincontrol..........................................46#24:There’salwaysareasontobeanxious.............48#25:Youhaven’treachedyourturningpoint..........50

Areyoufeelinganxious?

Ifyouare,you’renottheonlyone.

Infact,aboutoneinfiveofusisdealingwithhigherthannormallevelsofanxietyonanygivenday.

Ispentaboutfifteenyearslivingwithhighanxiety,tothepointwhereIwashousebound,soIknowall

aboutit.

Inthissmallbutpowerfulbook,Ilistthetop25reasonswhyyou’reanxious–andtellyouwhatyou

candotohelp.

Therightanswers,combinedwithalittlebitofwillpowerandself-belief,canbelife-changing.

CarlVernon

#1:You’relookingforacure

Let’sbeclearfromthestart.Youwon’tfindacureforanxietyinthisbook.Why?Becausethereisn’t

one!

Thekeytodealingwithanxietyisappreciatingthatitwillalwaysbethere.Ratherthanaimingtogetridofitbyfindingacurethatdoesn’texist,yourfocus

shouldbeonbettermanagingit.

Whenyougetsadorangry,doyouwanttogetridoftheseemotions?Ofcoursenot!Feelinganxiousis

justasnormalandhealthy.

Thetruthis,whenyou’redealingwithsevereanxiety,you’redealingwithhigherthannormal

levelsofanxiety–that’sall.

Inotherwords,youjusthavetobringyouranxietybackdowntoamorebalancedlevel.

Changehowyouviewanxiety

Beclearthatacureforanxietydoesn’texist.

Anxietyisafixed,naturalpartofourlives,soyouhavetostartgettingcomfortablelivingwithit.

Stopfightinganxiety,becauseit’sabattleyou’ll

neverwin.

Instead,lookatanxietyasafriend–afriendwhowillalwaysbethereforyou,keepingyousafeandprotectingyou.Putyourarmaroundanxietyand

thankitforbeingthereforyou.

Knowthatyouarenormal,andallyouneedtodoisaimformorebalance.

FindouthowinAnxietyRebalance.

#2:Yourfocusisoff

Thenexttimeyou’reinthecaroronabike,lookinthedirectionyouwanttogoandyou’llnaturallygo

inthatdirection(don’thitanything!).

Lifeisverymuchthesame.Whateveryoufocusoninlife,youwillgetmoreof–that’safact.Ifyour

focusisonanxiety,therearenoprizesforguessingwhatyou’llgetinreturn.

Overcominghighanxietyrequiresamajorshiftin

focus.

AsAlbertEinsteinsaid,thedefinitionofinsanityisdoingthesamethingoverandoveragainand

expectingdifferentresults.

It’stimeforanewdirection.

Lookinthedirectionyouwanttogo

Ifyoukeepheadinginthesamedirection,doingthesamethingsyou’vealwaysdone,youwon’tget

anythingdifferent.

Decidenowwhereyouwantyourlifetogo.

Pictureeachstepofthejourneyandtheenddestination,andyou’llnaturallyheadinthat

direction.

Focusonwhatyoudowant,ratherthanonthethingsyoudon’twant.Remember–youwillget

whateveryoufocuson.

Askyourself:whatdoIwant?Youroddsofachievingithavejustincreasedby100%.

#3:Youliveintheworldof‘whatif…?’

Livingintheworldof‘whatif…?’causesustoseriouslyoverthink.Whenweoverthink,wecreate

problemsthatdon’texist.

Ilivedintheworldof‘whatif…?’formanyyears.Ican’tcountthenumberoftimesIdiedatragic

death,orhadsomethingunspeakablehappentome(allinmyhead,ofcourse).

Highanxietyhasanincredibleabilitytomakeyouthinkandbelieveallsortsofthings.Themoreyouthink,themorebizarreyourthoughtshavetobeto

grabyourattention.

Youcreateyourownworld.Ifyougooutbelievingallpeoplearehorrible,that’sexactlywhattheworldwilldeliver.Whenyougooutwithasmileonyour

face,yougetsmilesback.

Startcreatingandlivingintheworldyouwant

You’vebeenlivinginamade-upworldforfartoolong–it’stimetostartlivingintherealworld.

It’stimetostartcreatingaworldyouwanttolive

in.

Thenexttimeyouleaveyourhome,thinkabouthowyouwanttheworldtotreatyou.

Ifyouwantrespect,kindnessandgenerosity,startbehavingrespectfully,kindlyandgenerously.

Theworldisareflectionofyou.

#4:Worryinghasbecomeabadhabit

Worryingisabadhabit.Thelongeryou’vebeenaddictedtothisbadhabit,thestrongeritwillbe.Youmightevenworrywhenyouhaven’tgot

anythingtoworryabout!

Althoughyouknowworryingisnogoodforyou(becauseit’sexhaustingandpointless!),you

continuetodoitbecauseithasbecomepartofwhoyouare.Ithasbecomeafixedpartofyourroutine.

Worryingisahabityouhavetobreak,givingyoutheopportunitytodevelopbetter,healthierhabitsthatwilltakeyourlifeforward,notholdyouback.

Breaktheworryhabitandlookfornew,betterhabits

Ittakestimetogetoutofabadhabit(likeworrying),butitstartswithmakingaconsciousdecisionthatyou’regoingtodosomethingaboutit

–NOW.

Don’tjustgothroughthemotions.Instead,recogniseyourbehaviourandpatterns.

Ratherthancontinueaworryingtrainofthought,formanewhabitoftakingaction(#5willhelp).

Youcan’texpecttostopabadhabitovernight–especiallyifithasbeenahabitforyears,oreven

decades.Bepatient.

Makethatdecisiontoday,andtakeitonestepatatime.Overtime,youwillunravelthatbadhabitin

thesamewayyoudevelopedit.

#5:You’vestoppedtakingaction

It’sanxietyoraction.Thereisnomiddleground.You’reeithertakingaction–orallowinganxietyto

takeover.

Lifeisaseriesofactions.Somepeopletakemoreactionsthanothers,andthesepeopletendtobethe

oneswhoarelivingthelivestheywant.

Theactionsyoutakewon’talwayswork,butaslongastheyleadontomoreaction,itdoesn’tmatter.It’s

aboutprogression,notperfection.

Youalwayshaveachoice–everybodydoes.Youcanstayathomeinbed,withthecurtainsdrawn,

wishingforthedaytoend,oryoucantakeaction.

Neverstoptakingaction

Theonlywayoutofhighanxietyisthroughtakingaction.

Actionisyourdirectroutetolessanxiety.

Itdoesn’tneedtobeanythingbig.Itcanstartwithsomethingassmallaschangingyourphysicalstate–likedecidingtosmileinsteadofbowingyour

head.

Thatactionwillleadontoanotheractionyouwouldn’thavetakenifhighanxietywasyourfocus.Whoknows,overtime,wherethatmighttakeyou?

Neverstoptakingaction.

#6:Fightorflightisbeingabused

We’veallheardoffightorflight–nature’sbuilt-insystemtohelpusgetoutofdanger.That’sthethingyou’reabusing.You’renotdoingitintentionally,but

nevertheless,it’shappening.

Thisfabuloustooleveryoneisbornwithisbeingoverused,becauseanxiouspeopleover-reacttonormalsituations.Wemayperceiveeverydaythingslikegoingoutwithfriendsorgoingtothesupermarkettobehellonearth–usuallybecause

wepanickedthelasttimewedidit.Ifyou’regoingtostartenjoyingthebasicthingsinlife,youhavetostartlookingatthemwithout

thinkingtheymeanimpendingdoom–becausetheydon’t!

Retrainyourbrain

Ifyoujumpintothepoolatthedeependwithoutlearningtoswim,you’llfranticallysplashabout,and

promiseyourselfyou’llneverdoitagain.

Thekeytosuccessfullyretrainingyourbrainistotakeitslowly,andtakeitonesmallstepatatime.

Provetoyourbrainthatwhateveryou’reafraidtododoesn’tposeathreatbyfacingitfrequently.

Avoidingwhateveryou’reafraidtodowillonlylead

tomoreavoidanceandanxiety.

Getridofthethreatandenjoythefreedom.

#7:Youdon’thaveto

Thisisthereasonthatwillhityouthehardest.Ifyoucanbestrongenoughtoconsideritproperly,andnotimmediatelytakeoffence,itwillchange

yourlife–becauseitis100%accurate.

Wedothingsbecausewehavetodothem.Thesamegoesforthethingswedon’thavetodo–wedon’t

dothembecausewedon’thaveto.

Ifyoudecidenottogotothesupermarket,whowillgoforyou?Ifyoudon’tgotowork,whowillpaythebills?Ifyoudon’tseefriends,haveyouconvincedyourselfit’sbecauseyoudon’tneedpeopleinyour

life?

It’sonlywhenweputourselvesina‘haveto’statethatthingsgetdone.

ScrapyourplanB

AlbertEinsteinsaidthatlifeislikeridingabicycle,andtokeepyourbalanceyoumustkeepmoving

forward.

Imaginethere’sachainsawcomingatyoufullpelt,andyouhavenochoicebuttomoveforward.Goingbackwardsorstoppingmeansgettingstuckinthe

cuttingchainsofanxiety.

Don’tgiveyourselfaplanB.Instead,makeitsoyouhavetodowhateveryouwanttochange.Makeitsolivingalifedominatedbyhighanxietyisnolonger

anoption.

Tellthepeoplearoundyouexactlywhatyou’regoingtodo.Yournaturalneedforapprovalfromotherswillreinforceyour‘haveto’mentality.

#8:Youfearthefear

Callitapprehensionorworryifyoulike,butwhenyou’reinastateofhighanxiety,youfearwhatfearmightdonext.Inotherwords,youfeelanxious

aboutbeinganxious.

Doyourememberthelasttimeyoudidsomethingbrave?Howdidyoufeelafterdoingit?Didyou

wanttodoitagain,andagain,andagain,becauseitwasn’tasbadasyouhadanticipateditwouldbe?

Maybeyoufeltexhilarated.

Theworstpartofpushingpastyourcomfortzoneisthefeelingoffearyougetwhenyougotomakeithappen.Thisfeelingisthethingwefearthemost,nottheactionitself–andlearningtoharnessthisfearwillpushyoutoachievethingsyounever

thoughtpossible.

Feelthefear,anddoitanyway

SusanJeffers’booktitlesumsitupperfectly.

Acceptthatthefeelingoffearwillalwaysbepartofyourjourney.

Knowthatitwillbethemostchallengingpartof

yourgrowth,andonceyoubreakthroughit,theskyisthelimit.

Lookbackwithasmileonyourface,andlook

forwardtothenextchallenge.

Fear(anxiety)willnolongerdictateyourfuture.

#9:‘Autopilot’isswitchedoff

Haveyoueverbeendrivingandreachedyourdestinationwithoutrememberinghowyougot

there?Fornon-drivers,maybethishashappenedtoyouwhenyouweredoingatask,likecleaningthe

house?

Whenapilotneedsarest,orwhenshedoesn’thavetocontroltheplane,shecanswitchtoautopilot.Shewillgobacktooperatingtheplanewhenshe’sneeded,likeduringturbulenceorwhenlanding.Yourbraindoesthesamething.Whenyou’re

familiarwithatask,yourbrainallowsyoutoswitchto‘autopilot’,givingyourbraintherestitneeds

(anddeserves).

Whenyou’rehighlyanxious,youdon’tallowyourbraintoswitchtoautopilotbecauseyou’reon

constantalert.Thismeansyoufeelexhaustedallthetime.

Learntoletgo

Whenyougointoautopilot,it’saverypositivesign.

Itshowsthatyourbrainhasbeencomfortableenoughtoputyouinasubconsciousstate,which

meansyouranxietyisundercontrol.

Togetintothisstate,andgiveyourselfawell-deservedrest,youhavetolearntoletgo.

Takeyourwhiteknucklesoffthehandlebarsoflifeandembracethejourney,includingallitsupsand

downs.

Puttrustinyourselfthatyouwillalwaysfindaway,andrememberthatyoucandealwithanythingthat

comesyourway.

#10:You’redependentonsomething

Itmightbeapersoninyourlife.Itcouldbeanobjectoraroutine.Maybeit’smedication.Whateveritis,it’sstuntingyourgrowthandpreventingyou

frommovingforward.

Themoredependentyoubecome,theworseyouranxietygets.Theshort-termcomfortyougetfromfulfillingyourdependencymightfeelgoodtobeginwith,butthiswillquicklyturnintoabadhabit,until

yourindependenceiscompletelyobliterated.

Ahappyandfulfillinglifewithlessanxietycannotexistwithoutahealthydoseofindependence.

Growyourindependence

Thegreatthingaboutindependenceishowquicklyitcanbegrown.

Likeamuscle,itwillgetbiggerandstrongerthe

moreyouexerciseit.

Whatactioncanyoutakerightnowtostartbeingmoreindependent?

Makeadecision–nomatterhowsmall.Simplyby

makingadecision,you’vebecomemoreindependent.

Keepgrowingthoseindependentmuscles.

#11:There’snothingleftinthetank

Anxietyhasagreatwayofzappingthelittleenergyyouhave,whichiswhythecycleoffearandworry

continueswithnorest.

Youloseyourappetite–notonlyforlife,butalsoforfood.Andthat’sanissue,becausefoodisthe

verythingthatwillgiveyouenergy.

Withoutfood(energy),youwon’thavewhatittakestodealwiththecurveballslifewillthrowatyou,includingtheanxietyandstressthatcomewithan

active,fulfillinglife.

Anxietywillcontinuetopileupaslongasyourenergylevelsarelow.

Fillyourtank

Youcan’trunonemptyanymore.It’stimetofillyourtank.

Evenifyoudon’tfeellikeeatingwhenyou’re

anxious,youhaveto.

Grabsomethingthatdoesn’ttaketoomuchefforttoeat,likeaproteinshake.

Someproteinshakesarealmostasgoodasameal,andcangiveyoutheenergyyouneedtopushyouforward–untilyou’rereadytopickupthosechopsticksandstarteatingproperlyagain.

Withenergy,you’llachievethingsyoudidn’tthink

wouldbepossible.

#12:Thepastandfuturesupersedethepresent

Mostofouranxietycomesfromwallowinginthepastandworryingaboutwhatmighthappeninthe

future.

Thereislittlepointinlivingwithregret.Thepasthasgone–thereisnothingyoucandoaboutitand

nothingyoucanchange.Thesamegoesforworryingaboutthefuture.Yourtimewouldbebetterspentfocusingonwhatyoucando,rather

thanworryingaboutwhatmighthappen.

Theonlythingthatisrealisthismoment,rightnow.Thepasthasgone,andthefuturehasn’thappened

yet.

It’stimetostartbeingmorepresentinthemoment.

Bemorepresent

Whenyoufeelanxietystartingtobite,drawyourselfbackinbybeingmorepresent.

Immediatelyrefocusbybecomingfullyconsciousofyourpresentstate.(Ifindithelpstoclosemyeyesandtakeaseat–sittingdowncantakeawaythe

urgencythatcomeswithstress.)

Remember:theonlythingthatisrealisthismoment,rightnow.Nothingelsematters.

Thepasthasgone,andthefuturehasn’thappened

yet.

Thepowerisinthenow.

#13:Youhaveagift

Ifyou’vebeendealingwithhighanxietyforawhile,youhavenoideahowspecialyouare.

Youhaveagift,andthegiftyoupossessiscreativity.

HowdoIknowthis?Becauseyouhavetobecreativetobeconsistentlyanxious!Howelsewouldyoumanagetomusterupallthosethoughtsyou

have?

Likeanygift,itcanalsobeacurse–unlessyouuseitproperly.

Yourgiftwillgotowaste(or,worse,beusedto

createlotsmoreanxiety)unlessyouutiliseittoitsfullpotential.

Channelyourcreativity

Let’sputyournegativethoughtstogooduse.

HerearesomecreativehobbiesIwouldrecommend:reading,writing,painting,drawing,cooking,embroidery,gardening,photography,

dancingandknitting(yes,knitting!).

Havingagoalrelatingtoyourhobby(suchascompletingaDIYprojectorlearninganew

languageorinstrument)isalsogreatforbanishingnegativethoughts.

Getstartedtoday!

#14:Youdon’ttakerisks

Takingagamblemeanssomethingmightgowrong.Thatwouldrequireyoutotakeresponsibilityfor

youractions,andanxietydoesn’tlikethat.

Anditdoesn’tmatterhowtinytheoddsareofsomethinggoingwrong–youfocusonthosetinyoddsratherthanlookatthebiggerpicture,which

preventsyoufromgoingoutandlivinglife.

WhenIwasagoraphobic,Iconsistentlyplayedthewrongodds.Filledwithfearandthoughtsof‘whatif…?’,Ilookedatmyfrontdoorandfroze.The

minusculechanceofsomethingbadhappeningtomeifIwentoutalwayswonmeover,resultingin

mebeinghouseboundformonths.

Whatoddsareyouplayingwith,andwhatareyourisking?

Putyourchipsintherightbox

IfItoldyouthatyouhada99.9%chanceofwinninginlife,wouldyoutakethatchancewithme?Ihope

so–that’saboutthebestoddsyoucanget.

Well,that’sexactlywhatI’mtellingyou.

Bynottakingachanceinlife(whetherthismeansnotleavingyourhouse,notapplyingforthatnewjobornotseeingyourfriends),you’replayingwiththe0.1%chancethatsomethingwillgowrong.

IknowwhatoddsI’mplayingwith.

Whataboutyou?

#15:Youlivewithinyourcomfortzone

Everybodyhasacomfortzone–azoneinwhichtheyfeelsafe.Ifyou’reanxious,it’slikelythatyour

comfortzoneisn’tverybig.

Highanxietylikestokeepyourcomfortzonesmallbecauseitmakesiteasiertokeepyousafe.Theproblemwiththisisthatyourcomfortzonecouldshrinksomuchthatyoumightbecomeuneasyaboutdoingeverydaythings,likeleavingyour

house.Orleavingyourbedroom.

Ifyourcomfortzoneshrinkstoomuch,it’sfarfrombeingcomfortable–andthemoreunfamiliaryoubecomewithyoureverydayenvironment,the

worseitgets.

Getfamiliarwithunfamiliarity

Ahighlyanxiousbrainlikesfamiliarity.

Familiaritymakesitfeelmoreincontrol–andsafer.

That’sOK,untilitpreventsyoufromdoingallthethingsyoushouldbedoinginlife–likeleavingyour

house.

Youhavetoputyourselfinunfamiliarenvironmentstoprovetoyourbrainit’sOK.

Themoreyoudoit,thebetteryou’llbecomeathandlingunfamiliarenvironments,andthelessanxiousyou’llbeabouttryingnewthings.

#16:Avoidancegivesyoucomfort

Theproblemwiththiscomfortisit’sveryshort-sighted.

Avoidingthatpartyorweddingmightgiveyou

comforttobeginwith,butwhereisitleadingyou?Whatdirectionisyourlifetakingifyoukeepavoidingthethingsthathelpyougrow?

Itrynottohaveregrets,butwhenmyanxietywasatitspeak,Ideliberatelymissedbiglifeeventslikemyfriends’partiesandweddings.Ican’tgetthat

timeback.

Socialisolationisnotgoodorhealthy.Studieshaveshownthatitcanleadtoallsortsoflong-termproblems,including–youguessedit–anxiety.

Avoidavoidance

Howareyouevergoingtoknowifyou’veovercomeyourfearofspidersifyoukeepavoidingthem?Howareyouevergoingtoknowyoucanliveabalancedlifewithlessanxietyifyoukeepavoidinglife?

Embraceeverysocialopportunityyoucan;

appreciatelife.It’sshort.

It’stimetostartsayingyes.

Breakthroughthatcomfortzoneandstopallowingtheshort-termcomfortofsaying‘no’toholdyou

back.

Putawayyourexcuses.Startavoidingavoidance.

#17:Youhaven’tgottotherealcause

Inmypursuitofanswers,Iestablishedthatpeoplehavetwoprimaryfearsthatallouranxietiesrelatebackto:(1)thefearofdeath,and(2)thefearof

people.Inmybook,AnxietyRebalance,IcallthistheDPrule.(Dstandsfordeath,andPforpeople.)

Forexample,oneofmygreatestfearswashavingapanicattackinpublic.Iestablishedthattherealfearbehindthiswasdyingfromthepanicattack,and

beingembarrassedinfrontofotherpeople.Inotherwords,thisfearlinkedbacktodeathandpeople.

Tryitforyourself.Writedownyourgreatestfear,andthenkeepasking‘why’untilyoureachthereal

causeofyourfear.

Knowyouhaveaheadstart

Knowingthatyourfearalwaysgoesbacktojusttwothings(deathandpeople)isgreatnews,becauseyouknowexactlywhatyou’redealingwith.

You’venowtakenawaytheunknown,andtherefore

takenawaytheneedtobeanxious.

Usethe‘why’techniqueasmuchasyouneedto,andreinforcethisknowledge.Quickexample:Ican’t

leavemyhouse.Why?BecauseIfeeltooafraid.Whydoyoufeeltooafraid?BecauseI’mafraidI’llhaveapanicattack.Whyareyouafraidthatyou’llhaveapanicattack?Continueuntilyougettothereal

causeofyourfear.

Keepitsimple;don’tallowhighanxietytoovercomplicateyourfears.

Makeovercomingthesetwofearsyourpriority,ratherthanallowingyourselftobecaughtupin

worryingabouttheunknown.

#18:Youhavenoroutine

Yourbrainlikesroutine.That’swhy,ifyoudon’thavearoutine,yourmindcanquicklybecomea

breedinggroundforanxiousthoughts.

Withoutaroutine,you’redoingverylittle,doingnothing,orflittingbetweenonethingandthenext–

allthesescenariosleadtomoreanxiety.

Whenyouknowwhat’scomingup,ittakesawaytheunknown,whichiswhatwewanttodo.Banishingtheunknownmeansyouhaveverylittlecausefor

anxiety.

Youdon’thavetoplanyourdaywithmilitaryprecision,butknowingwhatyou’regoingtodo

whenyougetoutofbedisthebeststarttoyourday–andtherestofthedaytendstofollowinthesame

fashion.

Getalittlemorestructure

Startyournewroutineadayinadvance.

Beforeyougotobedtonight,planwhatyou’lldotomorrow,fromwhenyougetoutofbedtowhen

yougotobedatnight.

Highlighteachstep,andsticktoitasmuchasyoucan.

Purpose,gettingthingsdone,andendingprocrastinationarejustafewofthebenefitsyou

canexpect.

Tohelp,I’velistedtheidealdailyroutineonmyblog.Youcanfinditatwww.anxietyrebalance.com

(Type‘routine’inthesearchbox)

#19:You’rebreathingintoxicfumes

Whenyou’redealingwithhighanxietyyouneedasmuchpositivityasyoucanget,anditdoesn’ttakemuchexposuretoatoxicpersontoinfluencehow

youfeel.

Balancedictatesthat,aswellashavingplentyofgoodpeopleinyourlife,therewillbeplentyofbadones,soyoucanguaranteetherewillbetoxic

peopleinyourliferightnow.Whenyouthinkaboutit,you’llknowwhotheyare.Theyhaveagreatwayofsuckingjoyoutoflifeanddon’thavemanypositiveorgoodthingstosay.

Theytalkaboutthepastalotandseemtoplaytheroleofvictim.Theyareemotionalvampires!

Thistoxicityischokingyouandfuellingyourhighanxiety.Findingcleanairandspacewillgiveyouthepositiveplatformyouneedtomoveforward.

Attractthepositiveandrejectthetoxic

Recognisethetoxicpeopleinyourlife,andlimitthetimeyouspendwiththem.

Don’tallowthemtoinfluenceyouandyourfuture.

It’sneverbeeneasiertomeetpeople,andifyou’restrugglingtofindpositivepeople,lookharder–

theyareoutthere.

Ifyou’renotinagreatmentalplaceyourself,you’llfindithardertoattractpositivepeople.(Remember

–yougetmoreofwhatyoufocuson.)

Youhavetobereadyformorepositivity.

#20:You’velostyourpurpose

OneoftheworsttimesofmylifewaswhenIwokeupeverymorningnotwantingtogetoutofbed.I

feltlikeIhadnopurposeormeaning,andwhenthatfeelinghitme,allIwantedtodowasthrowthe

blanketsbackovermyhead.

Purposeiswhatgivesusmeaning,andwhenwefeellikewehavenopurpose,welosefocus–andlosing

focuscanresultininstantanxiety.

Youdon’thavetohaveagrandpurpose–justthefeelingofknowingyou’reneededisallittakes.

Thefactis,you’realwaysneeded(andwanted).

Don’tforgetyou’realwaysneeded(andwanted)

Youonlylackpurposewhenyouconvinceyourselfyou’renolongerneeded.

Nomatterwhoyouare,oryoursituation,

somewhere,someoneislookingforexactlywhatyouhavetooffer–whichmeansyou’realways

needed.

Youareuniqueandspecial.

Thereisalwayssomethingyoupossess,orknow,thatsomebodyelsecanbenefitfrom.

Fillthepurposegapandfindmeaningbyhelping

others.

#21:Yourfoundationsareunstable

Whenyoubuildahouse,youputitonastrongfoundation–otherwiseitwillcollapse,right?Allyourhardworkinbuildingthehousewillgoto

wasteifyourfoundationsareweakornon-existent.Ifyouagree,whyaren’tyoudoingthesameforyour

future?

Youcan’tpaintadamphouseandexpectthedampnottocomebackworsethanbefore.Itmightlooknicewhenthehouseisnewlypainted,butitwon’tlast.Youhavetotreatthedamp–otherwise,the

housewilltoppledown.

Ifyouareanxious,youhavetogettotherootcauseofyouranxiety,otherwiseyou’llkeepbuildingyourfutureonunstablefoundations–anditwon’ttake

muchtoknockitdown.

Gettotherootcause

Thereisabalancetobefoundwhenitcomestodealingwithyourpast.

Ifyoudwellonwhathashappenedinthepast,it

willcontinuetomakeyouanxious.

Havingsaidthat,Ifoundskeletonsinmyclosetthatneededtobesetfree.IfIhadn’tfoundhelp,theymightstillbetrappedinsideme,masqueradingas

anxiety.

Thisiswhereanexperiencedcounsellormightbeuseful.Agoodcounsellorwillhelpyoufindthese

skeletonsandsetthemfree.

Ifyouhaven’tdonesoalready,gettalking.

#22:You’rebeingbullied

Ifyou’redealingwithhighanxiety,it’slikelyyou’redealingwithpanicattacks.Panicattacksarebullies.

Thinkabouthowabullyoperates.Itthrivesonattention,andwhenyoustarveitofattention,it

movesontothenextvictim.

Itsoundsalittlestrangetothinkyouareyourownbully,butit’strue.You’veallowedyourthoughts

andemotionstogetthebetterofyou,andnowtheyaretakingadvantageofyou.

It’stimetostopthebullyandtakebackcontrol.

Say‘nomore’

Makeadecisiontodaythatyouwillnolongerputupwiththetorment.

Starvethebullyofattention,andstopgivingitthe

fuelitneedstosurvive.

Thenexttimeyoufeelanxietyandpanicbiting,remindyourselfthatyouareincontrol.Youdictate

whathappensnext.

Shout‘DOYOURWORST!’,andyouranxietywon’tgetworse;itwillgetbetter.

Nobodysaidthatdealingwithabullywouldbeeasy,butit’snoharderthanbeingbulliedforthe

restofyourlife.

#23:Youliketobeincontrol

Everybodylikestobeincontrol,buthighanxietylikesabsolutecontrol.

Alackofcontrolmeansthatunexpectedthingsmighthappen,andwedon’twantanymoresurprises,whichcouldcausemoreanxiety!

Theobviousissuewiththisisthatunexpectedthingshappen,whetherornotwe’reincontrol.

Uncertaintyisoneofthebeautifulthingsaboutlife–itkeepsusinterestedandengaged.

Imaginehowdullthingswouldbeifyouknewhow

theywouldgo100%ofthetime.

Learntodelegate

You’veheardofthesaying‘aproblemsharedisaproblemhalved’,right?

It’strue.

Stoptakingeverythingonyourshoulders,anddon’tbeafraidtoaskforhelp.Thereisnoshameinit,and

everythingtogainfromit.

Yousimplycan’tdoitallonyourown.

Anyway,thereissomuchmorejoytobehadwhenyouwinwithotherpeople.

#24:There’salwaysareasontobeanxious

Mymumhasanxiety.Itrunsinourfamily.

I’mnaturallyananxiousperson.

It’sraining.

Myjobmakesmeanxious.

Ihatemyboss.

Mypartnerdemandstoomuchfromme.

I’mnotgoodenough.

I’mtired.

Idon’thavethetimeorresourcestochange.

Ican’t.

Counteractthesereasonswithwhyyoucan

Evenifyourreasonsarevalid,givingreasonsforyouranxietygiveitmeaning–andwhenyougiveit

meaning,you’reallowinganxietytoexist.

Ifyoukeepstokingthefirewithreasons,youranxietywillcontinuetogetstronger.

CounteractitwithreasonswhyyouCANdealwith

highanxiety.

Everybodyhasthetoolstochangeandtheabilitytodealwithanxiety–includingyou.

Creativity,passion,decisiveness,honesty,generosity,sincerity,andlove.Thesearethe

unlimitedresourcesavailabletoyou–usethem.

#25:Youhaven’treachedyourturningpoint

Everybodyhastoreachaturningpointforrealchangetohappen.

You’llknowwhenyoureachyoursbecauseitwillfeellikealightbulbhasbeenswitchedoninyour

head.It’sacombinationofwantandbelief.Ifyouwantsomethingbadlyenoughandyoubelieveitwill

happen,itwill.

Thekeytochangethatlastsalifetimeisappreciatingthatlifeisajourney.Dealingwithanxietywillalwaysbepartofthatjourney.

Appreciateandenjoytheexperience,anddon’t

regretathing.

You’vejustreachedyourturningpoint

Butifyouhaveanydoubt,justrememberwhyyoupickedupthisbook.

ContinuingyourjourneyIhopethisbookhelpedyoufindsomeoftheanswersyouwerelookingfor.Ifyoulikedit,you’llalsolikemybestsellingbookyoucanfindonAmazonhere.They’llgiveyoualltheanswersyouneedtocontinuemovingforwardonyournewjourney.Takecareandbestwishes,CarlVernon