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ILFRACOMBE GOLF CLUB

THE BIRDIE

Another Bah Humbug Xmas Edition 2017

The Captain’s Christmas Message

A Committee is not just for Christmas!

Being in the depths of Winter with rare visits on to our wonderful Golf course it might seem that everybody has gone to ground unlike our pesky rabbits and moles but this is far from the truth. Our Committee continues to work hard on your behalf.

Greens have agreed the Winter programme with Richard and when we have our full compliment of Green Keepers works will begin in earnest which will continue throughout this year to really push our course to new highs.

House is continuing to maintain our Club with a number of improvements highlighted and already beginning to be achieved to provide a better environment and service to all members.

Our Office team including our new Honorary Secretary and dependable Treasurer ably supported by Wendy and Erica is keeping us all in check and

facilitating the smooth running of the Club hopefully into a prosperous New Year.

Richard our Competitions Secretary will be promoting new competitions as well as inter-club matches that I can only hope every member of the Club will support and want to play in.

Competition and friendship are the heart of our Club and I therefore hope to see you all around our Golf Course.

To be able to push and support these programs and initiatives our Marketing Committee will be of significant importance and I wish Kit and his team a successful year.

Last, but not least, the Re-development Committee need your input as you have no doubt seen around our Club various ideas to alter and improve our building. This however, needs your input so please take five or ten minutes to consider how you want your Club to develop, so please complete the questionnaires.

On a personal note I would like to thank Richard and his team for the work they have been carrying out on the Golf Course to keep us playing, Dean and his team for keeping us watered and fed and finally our Golf Pro for keeping our spirits up when the round hasn’t gone to plan which is more often than not in my case.

I wish you all a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.

Just a few of the great articles in this

issue

Page 2 Lady Captain Speaks

Page 3 Com-be-Leaks Exclusive

Page 4 Online Booking

Page 4 Vets Again

Page 5 Sponsored Open

Page 6 Presentation Evening

Page 7 Presentation Evening

Page 8 Art and Golf

Page 9 Committee Updates

Page 10 Quizzin’ Again

Page 11 Darke Matters

Page 12 Vets Captain

“Please take five or ten minutes to consider how you want your Club to develop”

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A Few Words from our Lady Captain

(OK possibly more than a few!!)

It’s been really busy since I did my ‘drive-in’ dressed as a jolly green MacMillan Midget ... I hope they don’t have any pictures to accompany this. (Ed. Of course we do! See page 5) Actually, it started before I became Captain because the Ladies played the Men in the coveted Huxtable Trophy! It was an excellent day … the gen-tlemen came a creditable second and the Ladies retained the Trophy!! No point whinging on about bisques or extra shots guys … man up!! There’s always next year!

Then I took over as Lady Captain … second time around, I must be mad!! But it’s been great fun so far! I have a great Vice Captain in Val Kimberley and an excellent Committee to stop me making any glaring mistakes … hopefully.

We had a Mixed Seniors Open Team Event at the beginning of October. This was really well supported and everyone had a great day! Well done to the winning team of Val Kimberley, Jill Bas-tock, Bob Butcher and Kevin Pearce. This event is in the diary for next year so we look forward to your sup-port again.

During our Gala Week the Ladies had a fun Vet’s day … your age could win you a prize! And we all enjoyed a relaxed fun day.

We also had an Open 3BBB which was well supported with visitors from Portmore, Holsworthy and Bigbury. Well done to the winners Jo Smith, Jane Rickman (Bigbury) and myself!! It was a beautiful sunny day and we were able to show our golf course in all its glory!

Many thanks to Ted Jones and Barbara Clatworthy for organising the 125th Gala Dinner … all the Ladies had a blast! We won’t talk about the comedian!!

As we enter the Christmas period we shall be raffling our usual amazing hampers filled with all manner of goodies to make your Christmas even more festive. So please give generously as half the proceeds will go to my charity, MacMillan Cancer.

Finally, it just remains for me to wish Iain Neale a happy and successful year as Club Captain and to wish you all a Merry Christmas and a happy, healthy golfing New Year!

125th Anniversary Gala Dinner

Jules Par, Birdie Society Editor.

The stars were out in force to celebrate the IGC social event of the year at the Barnstaple Hotel in September, when over a hundred excited revellers turned out to celebrate 125 years of golfing history.

The Birdie was fortunate to get an invitation and managed to catch up with an excited party organiser Ted Jones. “By Jove, they scrub up well don’t they! I hardly recognised many of the people here.” said Ted in between gulps of Chateauneuf du Tawpont. “It’s been a team effort to make sure

everything went to plan. Now we’ve just got to get through the comedian’s slot then we can really let rip with the dancing!” Sadly, the night was slightly marred when the Hon Treasurer had to be restrained when he discovered that he might have use the Club’s money to pay for the wine.

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Com-be-Leaks Exclusive

Julie Estrange, Birdie Occult & Witchcraft

Correspondent

The Birdie’s Chief Newshound has obtained a page from Mr Cutter's greenkeeping note book. And it blows the lid off any idea that IGC was aiming to be “The Best in the South West”.

The leaked document shows clearly how the current course improvements are nothing to do with developing the Club’s visitor or member rates but are, in fact, Mr Cutter’s evil scheme to convert the course into a Hollywood styled theme park.

A shocked Head of Greens Buster Jones told the Birdie, “I had no idea that Mr Cutter’s plans for to re-lay paths were all to do with visitor attraction and now’t to do with health and safety”. He went on, “But now you mention it; Mr Cutter has, on numerous occasions, been heard saying..’Quite frankly I don’t give a damn!’ Whatever next; Gone with the Wind?”

The Birdie also managed to catch up with an excited ex President Bob who wasted no time in extolling the virtues of thinking outside the box. “This is an ideal opportunity to get big money for the bunkers. We could turn the whole course into a Lawrence of Arabia landscape. Now wouldn’t that be something, darling!”

Wearing Pink for “Breast Cancer

Now” Research

Our Ladies certainly know how to do things in style. With three of our members having mastectomies it should be no surprise that they threw themselves into a fun fundraising event.

They wore pink wigs and clothes, bought lapel pins, wrist bands and golf ball markers. They also held a pink raffle and guess the weight of the pink cake made by Heather Cawthorne. Which was won by a visitor from Portmore Golf Club which he took home to his wife for her birthday that very day. Who said ro-mance is dead!

Ladies Club Captain Jean Wills said: “Our thanks go to Judy Keyworth and her team who put so much effort into organising this very special event. I’m delighted that, despite having only a few lady members present we were able to raise an amazing £700 for life saving research through Breast Cancer Now.

I hope that all our members will think carefully about supporting this essential research and donate to

http://breastcancernow.org

Follow the Yellow Brick Road

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On Line Tee Booking for Members

Ilfracombe Golf Club is moving into the 21st century. ‘To infinity and beyond’ ….or at least on to the 1st tee!’ Writes Stuart Darke, Birdie Techie and IGC President.

If you want to play golf and need to book a tee time, currently you have to either call in at the Club and visit the Pro or telephone him and wait for him to take his coffee from the clubhouse to see what times are free.

Well the good news is that from 2018 there will be another option. The Club is moving to online booking and will be using the BRS Golf Tee Time Booking Reservation System. This will allow members the flexibility and convenience to book tee times online at home or anywhere else that they can get an internet connection.

You will be able to view the timesheet and see all the bookings that have already been made and, more importantly, the free slots that still exist. You will then be able to reserve a tee time yourself and your playing companions.

To do this you will, of course, need an email address and then access to the internet.

Members who wish to, will still be able to book a tee time in the time honoured way by seeing Mark but we hope that this online booking option will give members a better experience using modern day technology.

In the New Year, members with an email account will be sent the details of how to register, together with a video link to show you how to book and cancel a tee time yourself.

So what do I need to do now?

If you already have an email address AND the office already knows it, then you are ready to go. All you need to do is register with BRS and to do this the easiest way is to visit our Club website and follow the “Book a tee time” link. It’s on the bottom of each page. You can call into the office for help with this.

If you haven’t provided your current email address, please call into the office and let us know what it is or send it to us by emailing the Club at ilfracombegolfclub@btinternet.com

If you don’t currently have an email address and would like to use this on line system, then you will need to create one.

Yes it’s those Veterans...again! As expected it

was another large field for the Vets Christmas Bash. The weather stayed

fair, the golf was well... they are Vets...OK! But the food and the banter

was amazing. And before readers get on their high horse…..where

can you get three fantastic courses for £14? Much respect to Dean

and his Brigade. Congratulations to the Odd Couple “Terry (The

Mafia) Stanley and Nigel (Oh Nigel!) Parker” who took the top spot.

As widely anticipated the Vet’s Captain David (Can-you-hear-me-at-the-back) Svenson gave an emotional speech, reminiscent of many any an Oscar acceptance mentioning virtually everyone… including Mike Humphries.

Strangely, Captain David chose to hand over the microphone to Roy (Jethro) Palmer to tell the customary jokes! Fortunately, it was long past the audience’s bedtime and our “Jethro” omitted the one about the “wife and the bathroom scales” but for some unknown reason did manage to include something about “it being in his jeans!” Happy Days! PS Chris Dyer got something for being steady!

“….We hope that this on line booking option will give members a better experience using modern day technology.”

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Sponsored Open 2018

This year’s event was very special because it had over 170 entries, all of which were probably to do with the fantastic prize of £5,000 for a hole-in-one.

Incidentally, our good friends and main sponsors at Westerly BMW, Barnstaple* paid for the insurance cover the Club took out on the off chance that someone is lucky enough to Ace the 16th. Or three other holes for that matter!

And talking of sponsorship; what a fantastic response from the IGC members and friends for sponsoring (nearly) all the holes. Each hole was £20! You do the maths!

As you will imagine an awful lot of preparation and planning goes into an event of this kind. So a big Birdie hug must go to Geoff Smith and all the members that took turns on spotting duties on the 16th, just in case some lucky player did actually manage an Ace it was verifiable as per our insurance terms. As usual Geoff’s faithful companion Ken was on hand to help with registering players and checking scores. Of course leading up to the event the weather had been absolutely appalling and it was thanks to our wonderful greens staff that we had a playable course at all.

OK, so on to the important stuff...like who won! Taking top spot were our visitors Thompson and Van Rensburg. Plucky runners up turned out to be our old friend Brian Gilbert and his chum Andy Redmore. Leaving the highest placed pukka home grown master and apprentice pairing of Iain Neale and Dan Moore. Other truly notables were Sue Neale and Jean Wills who won the Ladies prize and the battling family duo of Lorraine and Simon Kino who took the mixed pairs. Plans are already

underway for the 2018 event, which is going to be re-scheduled for earlier in the year to avoid possible poor weather.

* Might be worth noting that there is a pattern here. When you're ready to purchase a new car it might be worth suggesting that it would be nice if they could help with our next Sponsored Open.

You’re All Winners at IGC

Our members are versatile to say the least, and can be often found doing the most amazing things both on and off the course.

The Marketing Committee would like your help to promote IGC through social media (Twitter, Facebook, Instagram etc).

Erica in the Office would love to get your “tasteful” images and a few accompanying words to post to our social media accounts. We all agree that we have a fantastic course and clubhouse so let’s shout about it from the (virtual) rooftop. All in the best possible taste of course!

The total prize money excluding two’s was a whopping £730.

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2017 Presentation Evening and Roll of Honour

From left to right. Neil Geaney: Boone Bowl. Pat Marriott: White Cup. Mandy Melaragni:

Captain’s Bowl, Napier Cup & Rowe Bowl. Val Kimberley: Scratch Cup (Bronze). Ian Davey:

Ferguson Cup. Matt Hern & Gary Constantine: RCB Salvers. Iain Neale: NDL Runners Up.

Steph Long: Banfield Salver, Hole Cup & Past Captain’s Salver. Nora Rowlands: 3rd Div Scratch

Cup (Bronze) & Smyth Cup. Jean Wills & Fran Svenson: Foursomes Cup and Hotels Cup.

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From left to right. The Captain looking a bit cheeky. Jo Smith: Harris Bowl, New Year Cup

(Silver) & County Medal. Jill Woodward: Meredith Cup. Jo Smith, Val Kimberley & Jill Bastock

in their Reds. Moria Styles: New Year Cup (Bronze) & Warwick Cup. Geoff Smith: Guarding

the Silverware. Judith Nunn: Sands Salver. Jean Wills: Highcroft Trophy, Scratch Cup (Silver) &

County Medal. Geoff Smith & Penny Richards: Challenge Cup. Arnie Hern: Stephens Cup.

2017 Presentation Evening and Roll of Honour

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Vet’s Open 2018

The Vet’s Open attracted a strong and enthusiastic field of golfers from across the area. Sadly, the Birdie’s own golfing superstar was unable to take part due to a painful verruca. He was unable to present a note from his Mum and as a consequence The Birdie Editorial Board have launched an internal enquiry!

Anyway, what we can be sure of is that Nigel Parker, Kevin Pearce and Libbaton visitor Jim Willsmore took the top spot and £120. A jubilant Kevin told the Birdie in an email from the Caribbean that “We were

fortunate to have Jim with us. I understand he was looking for a game at Saunton, but as he had not booked at least three weeks in advance he was turned away. And then as luck would have it, his satnav took him the long way home and found himself outside IGC. And the rest is history as they say.”

Runners up were Frank Paver, Martin Evans and Kevin Harris with plucky thirds being Pat King, Ian Williams and Geoff Crocombe. Incidentally, Ian also won the longest drive.

And it’s a virtual bunch of flowers and get well soon card to Ian who must have exhausted himself to land up in hospital with a heart complaint.

As the Birdie top photographer was not available we don’t have any photos…So we’ve included an image from last year of a veteran struggling against the tide. Poignant or what!

Art and Golf

After the monumental success of Damien Hirst’s “Verity”, Richard “Leaky” Lewis has taken a rather unusual step in commissioning a new sculpture to be located above the 18th green.

An excited Richard told the Birdie that he was disappointed that more was not made of Club’s place in the North Devon landscape for over 125 years. “I may not know much about art, but I know what I like!” said Leaky.” He went on “And what the Club needs is an iconic; nay, beacon of inspiration that truly represents all that we stand for! I have copied drawn encouragement from that other piece of scrap masterpiece down by the harbour”

The original Verity statue depicts a pregnant woman holding aloft a sword while carrying the scales of justice and standing on a pile of law books. Hirst describes his work as a "modern allegory of truth and justice".

Richard has remained tight lipped about his plans but the Birdie believes the new statue will be called “Gerity” and will stand some 10 metres high. And as a homage to the original will include an open abdomen.

But unlike its older model Gerity will reveal the remains of a huge carvery and eight pints of lager.

A secret source told the Birdie that “Gerity” is said to be sculpted out of the European lard mountain, which Germany has insisted that we take as part of the Brexit deal. But will have the far more simple but poignant massage of a fat bloke that likes his golf and a pint.

The Birdie Arts and Media critic, Magnus Opus, has got hold of an initial sketch and offers his assessment, “My dear boy I simply cannot rest; it’s going to be sensational. I can’t wait to get the old mashie niblick out and ‘See Gerity from Every Tee’.

It’s going to swell the number of visitors to the club and they’re just the kind of green paying visitors the Club desperately wants. But oh how they will laugh. We must wait and see! Anyway I can’t stop cos I'm off to quaff a grandee G&T at our very own Rat ‘n’ Goldfish.”

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Committee Updates

The Birdie welcomes Geoff Smith to the post of Hon Secretary. We know that “The Governor” will bring much needed rigor and scrutiny to all the Club’s business. With his elevation, the Committee had a vacancy and Phil Webb has been asked and has accepted a seat at the table. Welcome back Phil.

The Club Committee under the stewardship of Captain Iain is seeking to develop a new approach to the Committee’s method of working, which involves a great onus on sub-committees to plan and deliver their own plans. These plans and how things are progressing will be scrutinised by the full Club Committee. Listed below are just a few of the many highlights from your sub-committees.

House: Geoff Smith (Chair)

#Remedial work nearly completed in kitchen to comply with requirements for 5 star Food Hygiene rating. #New window panes have been installed to replace 13 damaged/faulty ones. #Meetings held with Directors of PVF, formal offer from PVF to reimburse cost of replaced panels and to install protection across all panels. Club

seeking further clarification and details. #Revised dress code notices in and around Club. #Quotes being obtained for shed outside kitchen area to accommodate furniture and equipment.

Clubhouse Development: Ruth Evans (Chair)

#Looking at current facilities to ascertain a true representation of how they are utilised at this moment in time. Find out from the membership what their priorities are with a view to future redevelopment. #Plan for the prioritised projects with estimates. #EGM to present findings to members. #Also looking at opportunities for further waste tipping in the Goyle.

Have you completed the survey. Information on Club noticeboard and sent out by email. Your opinion is vital to the future of the Club.

Competitions: Richard Lewis (Chair)

#Final stages of bringing 2018 diary up to date. #Big thank you to Mark Davis for his action concerning Geoff Taylor’s recent medical emergency. #More regarding First Aid training and equipment to deal with future

emergencies in hand. #New competitions planned for Breakfast Trophy for 2018 Spring and Autumn events.

Greens: Ted Jones (Chair)

#More shale on order so that the paths will be ready to cover again in the spring. #New steps for 2nd tee completed. #Possible sand and grass seeds boxes on par 3s. #Looking at options to replace signage board and distance markers. #Consider building new path from car park to practice area. #Roping off edge of the reclaimed land to stop cars going too near the edge. #Reduction in bracken and hedges along 1st tee from road. #New mole catcher has caught 34 moles. #Jordan Wooden to replace Liam Foreman as assistant green keeper. Jordan starts 1st January 2018.

Marketing: Kit Leck (Chair)

# The Chair has set out plans and aspirations and an outline work programme over the next two years. This plan aims to support three main primary outcomes for the Club as a whole. Namely to increase visitor and membership rates and improve the visitor experience. # Actions will not be constrained by any artificial boundaries relating to hospitality, Proshop or the course. # The use of social media and other communication platforms will form the basis of all activity.

Finance: Tony Woodward (Hon Treasurer)

# OK so far. # The Club remains in a healthy financial position; but could be doing better. # Bah Humbug!

Other Important Stuff

#Roger Styles is chairing a working party looking at the Club’s buggy policy. There are two separate elements; rentals and member owned. Outcomes and recommendations to be published shortly. #A new Safeguarding and Child Protection Policy being drafted.

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We’ve Been A Quizzin’ Again

It was business as usual for Dave White’s Treacleminers who once again cruised to the top spot in the Big Barrington Quiz Night. And of course the ever present Berry Dodgers featuring Geoff Taylor came a respectable second...again!

An exhausted US Again (Bottom Place) Team Captain told the Birdie, “The questions seem to get harder! When are we going to have questions that we can answer. Like where are the Andes; cos we all know they’re at the end of your Armies. And what's the best cheese for coaxing a bear out of a tree...like we all know its cheddar!

The Birdie caught up with a red faced Big Des Barrington to respond to the criticism that the quiz is too tough. Des told the Birdie Science and Nature correspondent, Red Cheese. “I ponder long and hard over each question. I ask myself is this going to be a fair test of general knowledge and is it suitable for a fun quiz night? And of course the litmus test is my dear beloved Linda. I usually try the questions out on her first and if she knows the answer it’s obviously far too easy. Of course….”

At this point Big Des was rushed to hospital for emergency surgery. It later transpired that he accidentally managed to sit on his Ping Driver and needed emergency rectal surgery to remove it. Well that's Linda’s explanation and who are we to argue.

Ed. A big IGC shout must go to Geoff Taylor who was helicoptered to hospital during a recent Sunday Stableford. And while we’re at it how about a big thumbs-up to all the players that donated their competition entry money to the air ambulance when the comp had to be called off. You raised £350!!!

Turkey Trot

There was massive field for this firm favourite* in the IGC competition calendar. With great prizes to be won and what with the weather being favourable, it was always going to be a winner. And we were ready to rock ‘n’ roll once we’d managed to retrieve a jet lagged Captain Iain from across the Pond.

Topping the festive tree were David Hawley and Jason Wood. Both are relatively new members and we are delighted that they have chosen to join us at IGC. Other baubles and bright lights were Fran and David Svenson

(Runners Up) and Nick Gaunt and Neil Feltham (Third Place).

And there were more exciting prizes to be had when our very own “Derby & Joan” pairing featuring Alan & Nora Rowlands won the mixed prize from Geoff Smith and Sue Neale. Well done to everyone that entered.

Sadly, the event was marred when two of Santa's most trusted elves decided to play a vicious practical joke on dear old Santa. Children can be assured that the decapitated Santa head was not real.

The Birdie can report that after the event The Governor undertook a citizen’s arrest of the naughty elves who have been charged with “running out of mince pies” and “serving watered down mulled wine”. *Ed. Unless you’re a vegetarian or even worse a turkey!

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Darke Matters: Member Banned

New Ilfracombe Golf Club member Mr John Sykes has just been banned from playing for 6 months for repairing pitch marks on the greens. Mr Sykes told the Birdie, “At my previous club in Hampshire, the

members were encouraged to look after the greens and repair their pitch marks, so when I joined Ilfracombe I thought that the same thing would be welcomed. On my first full round having paid my subscription fee, I noticed that there were a huge number of pitch marks that nobody had repaired. Being a considerate golfer and wanting to impress my fellow members I took out my repair tool from my bag and went to work. There must have been 10 or 12 newly formed pitch marks on the first green that needed attention, so I duly repaired them.”

“I was totally surprised to hear the next day that I had been summoned to a meeting with the Club Committee for inappropriate behaviour on the course and even more shocked to discover that they intended to impose a six month ban for tampering with the greens.”

A representative for the Club, who wishes to remain anonymous, but who is Mr Geoff Smith of Combe Martin, told us “I am shocked that Mr Sykes’ playing partners, who were all seasoned members of the Club, didn’t tell him that we just don’t do that sort of thing in Ilfracombe. Mr Sykes should have realised that so many pitch marks on the greens meant that as members we can’t be bothered to repair them and in fact we find it offensive that anyone should try and humiliate the rest of us by actually doing just that.”

A long-standing member of the Club, a Mr King, also confirmed that he couldn’t putt to save his life, so why would he bother repairing marks on the green. In fact he said, “Only last week one of my strokes on the 6th green hit several of these pitch marks, which managed to throw this misguided putt back on course and into the hole. So why would anyone be foolish enough to try and repair these little helpers? In fact, I gave a good hiding to the last person that I saw repairing a pitch mark!”

The Club representative said that it was an unfortunate but inevitable outcome that Mr Sykes should receive a ban and added, “I hope that after his punishment has been served, Mr Sykes will return to playing at Ilfracombe and leave those unsightly pitch marks well alone.” Mr Sykes, on the other hand is determined to fight his ban and indeed try to encourage other members to break with tradition and repair pitch marks as well. He has started a campaign with the slogan ‘Take a prick to pitch marks’. So if you know a prick, please encourage him or her to repair their pitch marks on the greens.

The correct way to repair a pitch mark!

Weather Report

The course has been plagued with the sort of mud and puddles that only Winnie The Pooh and his chums would love. Writes Nimbus Storm, Birdie metrological person.

And as for the wind there have been so many trollies going all floppity flappity one wonders if the boys and girls were playing golf or were in some bizarre re-enactment of the TV classic game “It’s a Knock Out”.

Sadly, Mr Cutter’s rainwater pipette is no longer reliable since being infested by frogs and the Met Office is unable to offer long range forecasts because they get them wrong.

Luckily, the Birdie was able to track down Gipsy Rose Wills who, with the aid of a crystal ball and a new £10 note was

willing to offer some weather advice. “I sees a tall dark stranger selling Mars Bars, weather proof clothes and sun block. And I thinks that there’s a goin’ to be loads of weather.”

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Veterans

Captain

Being rather inexperienced in organising golf societies and matches I have been very fortunate to have had wise council from existing veteran members, particularly Eddie Beer, Geoff Smith, Stuart Darke, Nick Long and my

other Veteran colleagues. Also our Vets Vice Captain Mike Humphrey who has been particularly supportive.

The Veterans have been busy competing in the latter stages of various competitions. Notably we have had great success in both the Emerton Court Cup and North Devon and Cornwall Veterans league (ND&CVL) competitions. We reached the semi final of the Emerton Court Cup and the final of the ND&CVL losing in the semi final of the Emerton Court on the 21st hole. Our success in these competitions is no fluke and in my opinion is purely down to the leadership of Stuart Darke and Eddie Beer.

Our Tuesday roll ups have generally been blessed with playable weather. The Brian Wright competition has completed three of the 12 rounds planned and the joint leaders at the moment are Chris Dyer and Ian Smith – a long way to go yet. Winner is the golfer with the highest total score from their best six Stableford rounds.

Congratulations to Peter Reed for winning the J Page Stableford competition for Veterans age 70 years or older. His 38 points not only won him the trophy but also the day’s general individual Stableford competition.

Both competition prizes combined were vouchers for the Club House Sunday carvery for six. Hope Peter and his friends have good appetites.

Twenty five friendly matches for 2018 have been arranged. Two fewer than last year as Launceston advised me they are unable to provide a team willing to travel to Ilfracombe. This may be a problem for them as we are both in the same division of the ND&CVL and we host one of the days.

The Veterans joined the Ladies section in contributing to the costs for our long serving greenkeeper Neil Turner and his wife Claire to stay with their daughter at Birmingham Orthopaedic Hospital. We wish them well.

The Veterans Christmas lunch will have been held by the time you read this. Thanks to everyone that helped us get home by pointing us in the right direction and for not standing on our hands as we travelled. But don’t worry if you can’t remember it, you probably were there!

I have been reminded to mention that Kit Leck won the Vets Autumn away day! And of course a big thank you to Dave Reece and Team for organising another great day. On behalf of the Veterans society I wish all members and staff of our golf Club a merry Christmas and happy new year.

David “Can You Hear Me At The Back” Svenson

Vets Captain

Top Tips from a Top Golf Professional

Well it’s that time of year again when at least one loved one utters those immortal words, “What do you want for Christmas?” Under no circumstances do you want to leave things to chance; so it’s a really good idea to be specific. Why not try the following response.

“Thank you for asking darling what I’d really like is one of those new Ping drivers. I understand that the unique forging process and patented heat-treatment process of the T9S+ face powers a thinner, hotter impact area designed to

elevate ball speed across the entire face for 16% more flexing and when paired with the aerodynamic gains, results in ball speeds nearly 2 mph faster. And that’s not all, by making the face 6% thinner and 9% lighter, extra weight was placed strategically to tighten dispersion even further. The forged face was also instrumental in producing the powerful feel of the driver.”

Of course if you don’t provide this very specific response and leave things to chance you run the risk of getting one of those things for stamping your name on your golf balls or even worse a designer “Don’t worry Tee Happy mug. Merry Christmas and Happy Golfing.