Humor for the Classroom

Assembled byBetty Scott

TX FBLA State Adviser

SOCIAL MEDIA EXPLAINED TWITTER I’M EATING A DONUT FACEBOOK I LIKE DONUTS FOURSQUARE THIS IS WHERE I EAT DONUTS INSTAGRAM HERE’S A VINTAGE PHOTO OF MY

DONUT YOU TUBE HERE I AM EATING A DONUT LINKEDN MY SKILLS INCLUDE DONUT EATING PINTEREST HERE’S A DONUT RECIPE LAST FM NOW LISTENING TO “DONUTS” G+ I’M A GOOGLE EMPLOYEE WHO

EATS DONUTS

MegahurtsEmployees at high-tech firms are burning out from stress. Here are possible names for this new malady:

Applleplexy Dot.coma Cybermyalggia IPOchondria appsphyxia

Bad spellers of the world—untie!

Proofread

Photoshop:

helping the ugly since 1988

Why would Snow White make a good judge?

Answer:Because she’s the fairest in the land!

Respect your elders. They

made it through school without

Google or Wikipedia.

The new voicemail:

“If you have reached this recording, please hang up and text me.”

A will is a dead giveaway.

You are stuck with your debt if you can’t

budge it.

If you take a laptop

computer for a run you could

jog your memory.

Rear ViewMy nephew works at a copy shop. A customer brought in a snapshot he had taken of the front of his house. "Would you scan this picture onto a computer screen?” he asked. "Then rotate it 180 degrees. I need a photo of the back of my house.“

If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn’t it follow that• Electricians can be delighted•Musicians denoted• Cowboys deranged•Models deposed and• Drycleaners depressed?

Lost Jobs

I give 100% at work!Monday………13%Tuesday……….19%Wednesday….25%Thursday……..37%Friday………..…..6%

The banker fell overboard froma friend's sailboat.The friend grabbed a life preserver, held it up, not knowing if the banker could swim, and shouted, "Can you float alone?""Well, you would need some sort of collateral," the banker replied, "but this is a heck of a time to talk business."

Overboard

Photo Perspective

SHOULD THESE

GUYS BE FIRED?

An employee approached hisboss regarding a dispute on his paycheck.Employee – “Sir, this is $100 less than my salary.”Boss – “I know. But last month, when you were overpaid $100, by mistake, you didn’t complain!”Employee – “Well, I don’t mind an occasional mistake, sir, but it seems to be becoming a habit, now!”

Paycheck To Paycheck

Hospital Chart Bloopers•Patient refused autopsy.•Patient has no previous history of suicides.•Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.•The second day the knee was better; the third day it disappeared.•Patient has been depressed since she began seeing me in 1993.•Discharge status: Alive but without permission.

True StoryTech Support: "I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop."Customer: "Ok."Tech Support: "Did you get a pop-up menu?“ Customer: "No."Tech Support: "Ok. Right click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?"Customer: "No."Tech Support: "Ok, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?"Customer: "Sure, you told me to write 'click' and I wrote ‘click'."

My Keyboard

A friend asked me for adviceon organizing his final report for the year. "Why don't you use Roman numerals to head the different sections?” "I already thought of that," he replied, “but my keyboard doesn't have Roman numerals on it."

Real Life Photo Shop

On the Internet you can be anything you want. It’s strange so many people choose to be STUPID!

and doctors practice but the rest of us work for a living!

Did you ever notice that musicians play

If your work is not finished, blame it on the computer!

A guy walks into his boss’s office. “Sir, I’ll be straight with you, I know the economy isn’t great, but I have three companies after me, and I would like to respectfully ask for a raise.” After a few minutes of haggling, the boss finally agrees to a 5% raise and the guy happily gets up to leave. ”By the way”, asks the boss as the employee is getting up, “which three companies are after you?” “The electric company, water company, and phone company”, he replied.

In Demand

A guy shows up late for work.The boss yells, "You should have been here at 8:30!"The guy replies, "Why? What happened at 8:30?"

For Work

COMMENT LOADING…

SRSLY?

What kind of soap does a judge use?

Answer: Trial size!

How do trees get on the Internet?

Answer: They log in!

Why was the belt arrested?

Answer:Because it held up some pants!