how to finish difficult projects

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How to Finish Difficult Projects

By Jennifer Barthe

Abstract

We all love to tell our friends and family members about the new goal we’ve set for ourselves. Maybe

we plan on writing a novel, applying to law school, or losing ten pounds in ninety days. Sometimes life

gets in the way and we run out of resources or become overwhelmed with the complexity associated

with the goal. Either way we have little to show for our efforts except for the half-finished book chapter,

the incomplete law school application, or the ten pounds that has now ballooned to twenty. In this

essay, I discuss some of the challenges faced whenever we try to finish incomplete and difficult projects.

Introduction

I never set out to write this essay, it just sort of happened. All of the information I present comes from

my private notes on how to improve my study habits. I was having a really hard time pushing through a

Biostatistics assignment and I couldn’t figure out why. After about three months of introspection I

realized what my real problem was. I then used the advice in this essay to get more work done in a

timely, if not more comfortable, manner. I’m grateful that my thought experiment may be able to help

someone else.

There are eight principles one must follow in order to consistently complete difficult projects. I must

warn you that the principles require a significant amount of inner reflection and persistence. The advice

given is common sense but as we all know, commons sense is not commonly followed.

First Principle: Embrace the Fear of Uncertainty

No one likes to feel uncertain. It’s scary and it tells the world that we’re not in control of our actions,

emotions, and surroundings. But if we are to become dedicated to finishing important projects we have

to embrace fear. When we refuse to admit that we’re feeling weak, we run away from doing important

work. What is important work? Important work forces you to stretch your boundaries and master skills

that create disproportionate results in life. These results are almost always positive but the payoff is not

always immediate.

A few examples of important work are to write your first novel, apply to medical school, run a marathon,

or marry the person of your dreams. These events can sometimes be stressful because they require a

series of smaller steps in order to be completed. But in the end, your life will probably improve over the

long run because you were courageous enough to keep going and not give up.


We are not as strong as we think we are. It is irrational to believe that we can conquer every single

obstacle that comes our way. Often we need obstacles to remind of that willpower alone cannot solve a

problem. Obstacles should instead be seen as opportunities. We may not be able to crush every obstacle

but we can take advantage of every opportunity.

When we focus on crushing the obstacle or outsmarting negativity with willpower alone, we slow

ourselves down. No matter how hard we try to assure ourselves that we’re strong enough, good

enough, or intelligent enough to devour any problem that stands in our way, we rarely make progress.

Of course there are times when willpower is needed but the trick is to know when to use dogged

willpower. The fastest way to burn out is through abuse of willpower. We must save our willpower for

the difficult days when it is needed the most. We must use it when we need to make an emergency

breakthrough while completing our project. Then we must rest and focus on completing the small, daily

manage tasks. For we try to use significant amounts of willpower on a daily basis, we will burn out.

We humans, especially us Americans, have a need for control. This need has sent many of us down into

the valley of disappointment. Some of us have become Jack-of-all-trades because it’s easier to know a

little bit about everything than a lot about something relevant. We can wow friends with our lucid

vocabulary or our above average poker skills. We can answer all the questions on Who Wants to be a

Millionaire. Some of us also love brag about running five miles in the rain, without stopping.

But then something funny happens. We’re at a party and the guy across the room announces he can

run twenty miles not only in the rain but in the snow too. There’s also a woman at the party who’s a

professional poker player, and the bartender who just made our martini is looking for an editor. You see

he just finished his MFA and is looking for someone to turn his thesis into a book.

Do we feel insignificant right now? These people have outsmarted, outdone, and outperformed us.

There will always be someone who excels in areas we won’t or can’t. We must admit that we can’t

control everything because once we do; life will be a whole lot easier.

Where does this need for control come from? Who started the contest to see who could handle the

most, run the fastest, or impress the teacher? I don’t know but I can assure you this person did not live a

very happy life. How can one be happy when every single moment is spent in the spirit of jealous

competition?

Control is addictive because it feels good. It’s comfortable, soft, and secure like a cashmere sweater. The

only thing in life that we can control is our behavior but so few people choose to do this. It’s much more

tempting to try to control other people’s behavior. But we can’t control what others think of us no

matter how hard we try.

What we can control we take for granted, then we complain about how unhappy we are. Why should

we sit down and write the first chapter of our book? We’re tired and would rather blow of some steam

by hanging out at the bar up the street. We can’t go outside and run for a mile in preparation for the

marathon because we don’t have the time. We need to go shopping for a new book that we will never


read. Grad school application deadlines are around the corner but too bad we don’t feel like doing

anything about it. No one really cares when we’re screwing up our own life, that’s our choice. But a fight

will certainly break out if we do something to mess up theirs!

We need to embrace that we are sometimes weak and no one is going push us when we need it the

most. We must push ourselves using little bit of willpower. Then we must rest and use the willpower

again when we need it again in the near future.

Key Takeaways:

• We are profoundly imperfect and that’s part of being human.

• Fear is to be embraced, it’s a sign we’re about to engage in important and meaningful work.

• Willpower should be used only when you need an immediate breakthrough. Do not try to use it

every day or you will burn out fast.

• No one cares if you succeed or fail to reach your goal. We care about you but it’s up to you to

create a life worth living.

• No one is going to push you when you need it the most, only you can do that. Rescue yourself.


Second Principle: Place Small Bets

What are small bets? They are series of small steps one takes to reach a goal. They are usually very

boring and uneventful. That’s why most of us like to play BIG. We put it all in and hope for the best. Too

bad we usually lose!

When we’re in a rush to finish what has barely been started we are guaranteed to fail. We tell ourselves,

I’ve waited long enough and now it’s time to just do it, life is short!

Life indeed is short but the right time is always now. However, that doesn’t mean you need to rush out

and proclaim to the world what your new, big, bad idea is.

Think about it. How many times has this approach worked? Besides getting praise for your amazing idea,

when was the last time you followed through to completion on a larger than life idea?

What usually happens is that after the excitement, we burn out. We sprain our ankle while running up

the steep hill even though last week all we could do want jump over two steps. We finish reading a new

book in a hurry while failing to understand what the book was really about. But hey, we at least tried to

run up the hill or learn how to speed read in forty-eight hours. That counts right?

Not really.

We pull an all-nighter, cramming as much information into our fragile brains as possible. But who cares?

We have a test tomorrow and we need to pass it at any cost.

Then we fail the test or barely pass. But at least we tried, right?

We love to place large bets because it’s a way to show off how amazing we are. No one can think bigger

than us. We have more courage than all of the eight million people combined in New York City. We are

so good that we can defy the statistics. We can bring down the house and work the magic no one else.

But these big bets never pan out. We lose everything in addition to a large chuck of self-confidence.

Why aren’t we placing small bets? What’s the deal?

Remember, small bets are boring.

Who cares if we only write five hundred words a day in order to complete our novel? We’d rather be the

guy who can write a complete novel in one month. Then make it a New York Times Bestseller in six.

No one cares if we only run one mile four times a week in order to lose ten pounds. It’s more exciting to

run five miles seven days a week, eat salad all day long, and to drink two liters of water by bedtime.

We all know what happens when overdue things? We fail.

We blame the weather for not allowing us to run like we intended to. People keep sending us messages

on Facebook therefore it’s almost impossible to work on our novel.


Small bets are great because they allow us to cut our losses and move on while experiencing minimal

damage. If we lose, it’s not a big deal. Since we have plenty of resources be it time, money, or energy,

we can recuperate. We know it’s not the end of the planet if we only ended up write four hundred

words of our novel when the original intention was to write five hundred. It’s just simply not a big deal.

Unfortunately, if we’re known to play big, if people knew we were making small bets it could ruin or

reputation. We have an innate need to impress our friends, parents, teachers, co-workers, and fellow

students. What would people of us if they knew we couldn’t handle it all? We need to prove that we are

exceptional special little snowflakes. We are once in a lifetime unique.

After a period of placing big bets, some of us wise up. We’ve lost so much that all we can afford to do is

bet small. One more crazy stunt like last time and we’ll become homeless, kicked out of school, fired

from our jobs, or die from physical exhaustion.

We’re ready to take our time and appreciate the journey instead of focusing on the outcome.

Key Takeaways:

• Place small bets and you will win big in the end.

• Focus on gradual improvement and not overnight success.

• Big bets come from try to seek approval from others.


Principle Three: Seek Personal Validation

We told our best friend that we’d finally do it this time. We’re going to apply for the job, medical school,

or for a new fellowship. All we need to do is sit down and get to work. We’re putting everything behind

the goal and we’re not going to quit. Why? Because we told everyone we would stick to it this time

around.

Now that everyone knows we’re serious about our goal, we can relax a bit. No one is looking over our

shoulder. Therefore it’s OK if we take a little break, watch a movie, or go for a really long walk. When we

get back or when the show goes off, we’ll get back to work

The show goes off.

We get back from the walk.

Something else comes up and we never get back to finishing what we started.

Times passes and all we can do is think about the regret and lost opportunities we passed up because

we didn’t have the courage to keep working towards our goal.

We decide to try again. This time we’re armed with a new self-help book, we’re learning from a new

guru, and we’re smarter, not to mention older. This time we’re going to succeed and nothing will stop

us. Unfortunately the new book, guru, program, or spiritual way of thinking does not work. Maybe we

did it wrong or maybe there is something wrong with us.

Then something happens.

We start to value our own opinions a little more. We stop doing things just to see what our parents

would say. We stop caring so much about what our families and neighbors think of us. We realize that

this is our life and we only have one. Time is not promised to anyone and we begin to value the present

moment. We’re on the road to seeking personal validation and it feels good.

We stop caring about winning the awards or recognition and instead, focus on doing work we enjoy. It’s

a hard daily struggle, letting go of what other think of us. Yet we take small steps towards personal

freedom. It’s all we have left and without it, we will perish.

Key Takeaways:

• Personal validation allows us work on important projects even when we don’t feel like it.

• Social validation prevents us from finishing things because we get caught up in pleasing other

people. In the end, these people could care less because they have their own lives to live.


Principle Four: Clarity is a Daily Process

We spend years searching for our life purpose. We read countless book, watch dozens of videos, and

spend time talking with others about out life goals. We believe that if as soon as we know what our

purpose is life will become easy. No more struggling with money or complaining about being unhappy.

We spend years trying to find our passion in vain, yet ever so optimistic it will one day show up out of

nowhere

We are in search for complete clarity. We want the type of clarity that will give us the answers to all of

our problems immediately. We need it and we crave it. But try as we might, we never find it.

Where is it?

We think that age and maturity will beckon it to us but it never shows up.

Nothing happens until we realize that clarity has always been with us yet we chose to ignore it.

We begin to understand that we can develop clarity now, not tomorrow or next week. What we might

be clear about on Tuesday begins to make sense on Thursday. The longer we begin to think about a

problem, while focusing on the solutions we can enact in the present moment, the clearer we become

about our lives.

When we demand complete clarity without being willing to experience the circumstances that create it,

we fail. We remain stuck for the rest of our lives; miserable and complaining about what could have

been.

When we cultivate the habit of clarity on a daily basis we experience gradual improvements.

Key Takeaways:

• When we cultivate the habit of clarity on a daily basis we experience gradual improvements.

• Clarity is a habit that must be cultivated and nurtured.


Principle Five: Study Past Behavior

We can’t seem to finish the book we started writing three years ago. We still haven’t applied for the

dream job because we feel unqualified. Our grad school application is still incomplete.

So we quit and cut our losses. We’ve already wasted enough time and it doesn’t make sense to keep

wasting more.

But then we start the process all over again. Someone said or did something that rejuvenated our desire

to get in the game.

We’re excited get back to work. We’re going to write the first chapter of our novel. We run two miles

and congratulate ourselves on being able to get through the pain. We signed up to for a two day

workshop with a personal development guru. We study for three hours while straining to get through

the exercise questions. We set out to do what we planned to do and we feel good.

This time we don’t fail and we finish the project.

We’re finishers not only because we’re focused on personal validation but because we’re also learning

from past behavior patterns. We realize that if we pay attention to how we work instead of what we

work on, we can solve the problem of project incompletion.

We set the goal to write ten pages of our novel every day, but by looking at our journal notes, we can

see that we write only one page. So we tone down the goal and focus on what we know we’re capable

of achieving. Our notes tell us that we don’t work well in quiet environment so we move to working in a

coffee house. We realize that writing on the bed encourages us to fall asleep so we only work at our

desks. We don’t like to wake up early in the morning, so we decide to exercise in the evenings.

As we start to track our behavior and place small bets to alter it, we progress closer and closer towards

completing our most important projects.

Key Takeaway:

• Getting older does not always equate to getting wiser.

• Keeping a journal and then analyzing past behavior helps us progress in the right direction. We

must pay attention to what has and hasn’t worked in the past.

.


Principle Six: Focus on the Halfway Point

It’s hard to start something, easy to quit it, and hard to finish it. By focusing on getting to the middle, or

halfway point, finishing becomes easier.

The problem is that when we think we’re at the halfway point, we usually aren’t. We only pass the

halfway point when we feel we must finish what we started. The halfway point is not visual, it’s

emotional.

When we stop too early without ever coming back, chances were at the forty percent completion point.

We know we’re reached the middle of a project when we’ve invested so much in it, we can’t quit.

Quitting would ruin everything and set us back so far, we’d die. Not a physical death but an emotional

one.

When at the halfway point, we keep working only because we remind ourselves that the finish line is

within reach. We begin to focus on the rewards that come with finishing things. We also savor the

present moment because it feels good to know we’re completing what we set out to do.

We trust ourselves now and others do as well.

Key Takeaways:

• We only realize we’re at the halfway point after we’ve surpassed it.

• By focusing on getting through the most difficult parts of a task, we build the momentum

needed to complete the project.


Principle Seven: Embrace Generous Selfishness

When we are addicted to not finishing things, we develop an adverse of motivation.

We become motivated by:

• Embarrassment due to the lack of success in their lives.

• Regret for what could have or should have been.

• Jealousy; we want to see if we can out do and out shine a perceived competitor.

We’re embarrassed because we spent years waiting tables when our friends are working on Wall Street,

we decide that we’re going to finish writing our novel in thirty days or less. We’re convinced that if we

write ten pages a day, even though we can only handle writing one, all will be forgiven. We’ll get to the

place where we know we belong. We will fulfill our potential.

We’re full of regret because we never applied to grad school ten years ago. Then we get started on the

grad school application but it’s hard. We try to finish it but something always comes up. We beat

ourselves up for not having the strength to go all the way to the finish line. Regret begets more regret.

We’re jealous that our friend is doing better than us in school. They have everything while we have

nothing. We conclude that life is not fair, at least for us.

Things get better once we start focusing on generous selfishness.

We stop caring about what other people have, do, or what they think about us. We work on the projects

that are meaningful to us, no matter if we’re an entry level clerk or the CEO of our own company.

We work when we don’t feel like it, even if our life is a complete mess. We face criticism even though

we’re scared of it. We work in the middle of the night even though we’re tired.

It takes years of practice to develop selfish generosity but trouble we go through to develop it is worth

the price. We must experiment through little bets, trying one small thing here and there. Over time we

learn to think for ourselves and do what needs to be done in order to succeed in life.

Key Takeaway:

• Regret, jealousy, and embarrassment are terrible motivators for finding projects.

• The only way to finish anything is to focus on the type of person you want become in the

process.


Principle Eight: Make Completion the Ultimate Goal

Even when we come close to completion the project will not be perfect. We will make mistakes along

the way. There will be times when we want to quit and give up. If the goal is not worth it and we must

choose between our quality of life and completion, it’s better to choose quality of life.

We know that once we reach the halfway mark, finishing becomes a lot easier. We know that we’re only

halfway there when we can’t stop working.

The inner critic that tells us how stupid, dumb, and inexperienced we are is ignored. We imagine the

outcome of what could happen if people saw or heard about our finished project. It scares us to be so

transparent and vulnerable but we know we must keep going.

And then we’re finished.

We rest, relax, and show the world what we’ve done. It feels good to finally be able to move on with our

lives.

It’s time to start a new project. We embrace the fear associated with doing something new and the

process starts all over again. But we’re stronger this time around and it’s not so much of a big deal. We

know that we’re finishers and that’s all that counts.

Conclusion

The process of starting and completing important projects in painful. It’s hard for all of us, even the pros.

The good thing is that the more we focus on finishing things the easier it gets over the years. We start to

work on more challenging and important projects. The impact we create in the world widens and so

does our level of satisfaction.

It took me multiple revisions and total of ten days to write this essay. It was hard but I never thought

about giving up. My goal was to finish it as soon as possible so that I could use the advice to finish my

Biostatistics work! I needed some of my own advice to push myself through a difficult course.

I hope this essay helps you overcome the difficulties you’re facing in your own life. If you found what I

have to say helpful then please visit www.youcanlearnsciece.com for more free articles.

Thank You.

Jennifer Barthe

how to finish difficult projects

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