12 | OLAM | APRIL 22, 2016

F E A T U R E

When my son-in-law, Yeshiah, suggested his closest friend as a shidduch for our

daughter, I liked the idea. After checking him out, it was clear Ye-hoshua Hoffman had a growing spiritual nature. It seemed like a great match.

The first date was delayed until Yehoshua finished working as a counselor in a small religious boys’ camp in Maine. It was a job he loved doing – hiking, climbing and camping while teaching the boys Yiddishkeit.

After the summer zman was over, I casually asked my son-in-law how things were progressing. He looked at me in horror.

“I didn’t tell you? Yehoshua Hoffman was in a terrible acci-dent. He was driving a van with 13 people and pulling a trailer carrying canoes and something went wrong. The van and its load flipped over. One boy, 15-year old Gedalya Rosenblatt from Monsey, was killed. Others were injured, and Yehoshua became a quadri-plegic.

“Baruch Dayan HaEmes,” I said, in shocked.

Yeshiah continued, “I speak to Yehoshua about every other week. Usually his mother answers the phone and if he isn’t too weak, we talk in learning. He said he would soon be moved from Maine to a hospital closer to his parents’ house in Denver.”

“Next time you call him,” I said, “ask his mother if I can speak to her.” I had no idea what I would say; I just knew it was what I should do. I prayed that Hashem would give me the right words.

Yeshiah made the introduc-tions before I took the phone. “Mrs. Hoffman, I was Yehoshua’s

chavrusa. You may remember we had discussed a shidduch between Yehoshua and my sister-in-law. If you don’t mind, my mother-in-law would like to speak to you.” He handed me the phone.

“Mrs. Kantor, I’m so glad you called.” Sari Hoffman greeted me with warmth.

I muddled for words. “Mrs. Hoffman, I’m so sorry. Yehoshua has touched my heart. From all that I heard about him its clear you have a special son.”

“Obviously you should not feel beholden to the shidduch. He has a long road to recovery and the prognosis isn’t good. May Hashem grant that your daughter’s bashert arrive soon and you should enjoy her wedding.”

“Amen.” I was touched. Then the words just slipped out. “And you, too, will dance at your son’s wedding.”

She answered, “Amen,” but both of us knew this was out of the realm of possibility. Why did I say that? Wasn’t it better to stay focused on reality?

Six months later, Yeshiah with great joy announced the news: “Yehoshua is a chassan! And the kallah is a normal Bais Yaakov girl!”

The miracle came as a result of Aliza Bulow and her amazing daughter, Elisheva Hannah.

In the summer of 2007, Aliza, a Jewish educator, and director of the American women’s division of Ner L’Elef, an international leader-ship program, sat next to Mrs. Sari Hoffman at a wedding. They were acquaintances and shared stories of their favorite people: their children. Elisheva, Aliza’s oldest, was on her way to Israel for her fourth year in seminary. Aliza told Sari that Elisheva was disillusioned with shidduchim, going so far as to tell

her mother that she was finished with dating and was trusting her mother to find her a husband. Ye-hoshua, Sari informed Aliza, was planning to return to the Mir for his 5th year after the summer.

That night the terrible accident took place. Aliza did not speak with the Hoffmans’ again until the family returned to Denver. And then, Rabbi Henoch Dov and Sari Hoffman took advantage of Aliza and Ephraim Bulow’s offer to stay with Yehoshua in the hospital over a Shabbat so they could have a re-spite break.

Baruch Hashem, Yehoshua and the Bulows enjoyed each other’s company. Aliza even offered to teach him a memory technique that would help him access his previously-learned texts until he was strong enough to hold a book.

As Aliza shared Shabbasim with the newly-disabled man she start-ed thinking a truly unbelievable thought. She noticed how focused Yehoshua was on doing the stretch-ing exercises to prevent pressure sores, how he kept to a healthy but limited diet so he shouldn’t be too heavy to lift, how seriously he took his learning when he had a chavrusa, and the way he respected and treated the nurses, assistants and helpers, who now were part of his daily life. Aliza started thinking he might be a suitable match for her Elisheva.

She broached the subject with Sari, who at first laughed, and then, when convinced that Aliza was

The Hoffmans’ Miraculous

Marriage

The Hoffman

family

Aliza Bulow with the twins