Habits to Live By

A Virtual Personal Development

Course

Adapted from Stephen Covey’s 7 Habits of Highly Effective People

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Habits to Live By

• Welcome to the Woodson Center’s Neighborhood Leadership Development Institute On-Line (www.cneonline.org) .

• This time series training and development course is for community and faith based organizational leaders.

• The course is designed to provide development in three areas: personal, organizational, and community.

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Habits to Live By

• Each program curriculum track has several workshops that are presented using social media to include GoToMeetings.

• Each program curriculum track may be recorded and placed on the WC’s web site for viewing in the convenience of your home or office. The address is www.woodsoncenter.org.

• Participants will be able to get Continuing Education Units for each workshop.

• Please complete the SurveyMonkey at the end of each module.

Habits to Live By

• Tools you will need in this course:

– Access to a computer and the internet.

– Approximately 1 hour of time availability to

attend once a week online sessions and

participate in the virtual dialogue.

– We hope that you have been taking copius

notes on the training in your composition

book.

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Habits to Live By

• As of today, we have been discussing

Personal Development.

• This track has three components: Habits

to Live By, Career Development, and

Financial Literacy.

• This is the seventh session on Habits to

Live By which is adapted from the work of

7 Habits of Highly Effective People by

Stephen Covey.

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Habits to Live By

• 7 Habits of Highly Effective People

represent a holistic, integrated approach to

personal and interpersonal effectiveness.

• The real beauty of the Habits lies in the

relationship among the habits and how

those habits positively impact individuals,

their co-workers, family and community.

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Habits to Live By

• In Part I, we defined a habit as: where Knowledge, Skill, and Desire intersect.

• We want to be principle-centered Leaders.

• That is, leaders who set the tone and bring

a balance between character and

competence.

• Leaders challenge their mindsets as they

impact perceptions about others.

Habits to Live By

• In Part 2—Habit 1-- BE PROACTIVE. You

are The Creator; you are in charge.

• Use our self-awareness and imagination to

visualize beyond experience and present

reality—The Creator

• Make decisions that align with our values.

• Focus on our Circle of Influence.

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Habits to Live By

• Part 3--Habit 2- Begin with the End in Mind

you crystalize your self image using your

imagination to create the end you desire.

• Develop a personal mission statement and

personal goals, the foundation for

developing a plan for our lives.

• Now we can focus on results; know where

we want to be and when we have arrived;

give meaning and purpose to what we do.

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Habits to Live By

• Part 4—Habit 3--Put First Things First

• We explored the aspects of our lives to

identify what was most important to us.

• We learned that scheduling priorities is a

skill with outcomes that exceed our

imagination.

• We examined how to address important

matters that are not yet urgent to minimize

the number of crises– Put first things first.

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Habits to Live By

• Part 5—Habit 4--Think Win/Win seeks to

find mutual benefit that serves all parties.

• Win/Win—Brings Personal Leadership

qualities into relationships, i.e., principle-

centered character values of integrity,

maturity and the abundance mentality.

• It draws upon the Emotional Bank Account

based on trust to enter into Agreements

that allow all parties to Win/Win. WC NLDI Online 11

• Part 6—Habit 5--Seek First to

Understand… then Seek to Be

Understood” which seeks to be effective

communicators.

• We learned the skill of Empathic

Listening—that is, listening with our heart,

hearing the words, but, also capturing the

feelings and body language without

probing, interpreting or evaluating. WC NLDI Online 12

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Habits to Live By

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Habits to Live By

• Habit 6: Synergize – The Habit of

“Creative Cooperation”

– This habit aims to value the differences in

others; build on strengths of the members of

the group and compensate for their

weaknesses.

– Win-Win and Empathic Listening are two key

attributes to Creative Cooperation

Habits to Live By

• When we value our differences and seek

mutual benefit through Empathic Listening

we can create Synergy.

• Synergizing requires personal security to

listen to another’s approach to the problem

and to share ideas or strategies.

• Synergizing often brings us to a third

alternative and produces better long term

results.

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Habits to Live By

• Openness + Communications = Synergy.

• Defined: Synergy is the whole is greater

than the sum of its parts (1 +3 = 5-fold,11-

fold or even 95-fold).

• In Action: Synergy is when two or more

people produce more together than the

sum total of what they could have

produced individually.

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Habits to Live By

• What Synergy Is?

–Results oriented

–Values diverse perspectives

–Cooperation

–Mutually agreed upon goals

–Everybody has worth

–A process

Habits to Live By

• What Synergy Is Not?

• A brainstorming “anything goes session.”

• Accepting others’ ideas as the full truth.

• Win-lose postures.

• Group think.

• Only a negotiating technique.

• Always easy.

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Habits to Live By

Steps to Creative Cooperation:

– Consider the situation or opportunity

– Use Habit 5 (Seek to Understand)to explore

the underlying differences/causes of the

situation. Delineate the expectations or

positions of each party.

– Use Habit 4 (Think Win/Win) to introduce the

idea that a mutually beneficial solution can be

achieved. (Build the Emotional Bank Account)

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Habits to Live By

Steps to Creative Cooperation (con’t):

– Use Habit 6 (Synergy) to test the solutions by

allowing all parties to share their own ideas

and feelings about how the solution can be

achieved. (Value the differences.)

– The Result: A third Alternative involving

Creative Cooperation.

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Habits to Live By

Activity—

• Describe a personal or professional

situation in which you really valued

someone’s differences, and valuing those

differences positively impacted your

relationship.

• Discuss the evidence, effects, and benefits

of valuing the other person’s differences.

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Habits to Live By

• What are some blocks to Creative

Cooperation:

Blocks to Creative

Cooperation

Alternative Perspectives

Defensiveness

Let your guard down, take a risk

Closed-mindedness

Recognize your own perceptual

limitations

Adversarial

Give credence to the possibility

that the other person is right.

Protective Maintain self-confidence and

personal security.

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Habits to Live By

• Value Differences

• People respect each other.

• Value diverse perspectives.

• View differences as opportunities for

learning. Toleration is key.

• Differences enable us to discover and

produce solutions together that we would

not be able to do separately.

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Habits to Live By

Activity--

• Discuss a situation from your personal or

professional life in which valuing the differences of

someone else produced greater results than the

sum of what you could have produced individually.

• What were the differences?

• What was it about the other person that made you value

the differences between you?

• What did you learn from the experience?

• What effect did valuing the differences have on the

outcome?

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Habits to Live By

• Well, that activity may have caused you to see a

bigger picture of who you are and how you view

and value (mindset) others.

• One thing is for sure, you have to be mentally

prepared (inner personal security) to accept and

value the differences of others.

– Think win-win.

– Be open to new possibilities.

– Take a risk and value the differences of others.

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Habits to Live By

• Using the Seek First to Understand

Then To Be Understood habit allows

you the room to Creatively Cooperate

with the other party.

• Compromise sometimes is that third

alternative, but it is a low form of win-

win. Somebody had to give up

something to compromise.

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Habits to Live By

• Here’s some helpful tips when trying to

create a third alternative:

– Communicate to hear the feelings, body language

and the words to understand the other’s

perspective, build the emotional bank account.

– Express how you feel with courage and

consideration for feelings of others.

– Create a safe space where people can be open

to express themselves and abandon old scripts.

– Seek solutions that both parties feel good about,

a third alternative.

Habits to Live By

• Let’s apply Creative Cooperation to synergize

in the following situations using habits 4 and

5. You provide a response.

– This person really irritates me because we always are

at odds.

– I feel I am seeing the world through my cultural

lenses, and not as things really are.

– My family member or co-worker strengths are valued.

– To practice humility in my dealings with others, I need

to chill out.

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Habits to Live By

• In Summary…..

• Know that two heads are better than one (all

other things being equal).

• Know that better solutions come out of

valuing everyone’s input.

• Work to create an environment that is win-

win, inclusive of different perspectives and

view points, and believing that a joint solution

is better than any individual solution.

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Habits to Live By

• Next Steps

• We have placed an exit questionnaire on

survey monkey for you to complete to

assess how well you have retained this

module’s information.

• Complete the survey by going to

www.surveymonkey.com weblink.

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Habits to Live By

• Thank you for engaging in this on line

presentation.

• Our next NLDI session will be on

April 26, 2017 at 2:00pm

• Please compete the SurveyMonkey.