Guiding ChildrenHow do we effectively manage behavior of children.

GuidanceUsing firmness and understanding to help

children learn how to behave.

Children learn self-discipline when effective guidance is employed.

Guidance promotes security and positive self-esteem

When effective guidance is used, children develop a conscience

How?Be a role model

Give effective directions

Set limits

Provide positive reinforcement

Effective DirectionsBe sure to have child’s attention

Be polite

Use positive statements

Use specific words the child can understand

Begin with an action verb

Give a limited number of directions at a time

Be clear

Give praise and love

Set LimitsDoes the limit allow the child to learn explore,

and grow?

Is the limit fair and appropriate for the child’s age?

Does the limit benefit the child, or ist it just for the adult’s convenience?

Positive Reinforcementa response that

encourages a particular behavior

Be specific

Comment on the behavior as soon as possible

Recognize small steps

Help child take pride in their actions

Tailor the encouragement to the needs of the child

Use positive reinforcement wisely

Dealing with inappropriate behavior

Questions to ask when dealing with inappropriate behavior

Is the expected behavior appropriate for the developmental age of the child?

Does the child understand the behavior was wrong?

Did the child do the behavior knowingly and deliberately, or was it beyond the child’s control?

Unintentional behaviorThe child had no way of knowing the behavior

was wrong

Did the child have no control over the action

Was the action an accident?

Effective PunishmentReminds children that correct behavior is

important

Teaches there are consequences for poor choices

Avoids blame and criticism

If a rule is broken, young children should be reminded of the rule

Punishment should be in proportion to the misbehavior

Negative Reinforcementa response aimed at

strengthining a desired behavior by removing an

unpleasant trigger

Natural consequences

Logical consequences

Loss of priveledge

Natural ConsequencesChildren suffer from the actual result of their action

Child breaks toy, parents don’t replace it

Don’t lecture

Don’t remedy the situation for the child (defeats the purpose of a consequence)

Logical ConsequencesThe consequence has a connection to the misbehavior

Often used when natural consequences would be inappropriate (damaged property, the natural consequence doesn’t bother child)

Be prepared to follow through

Lack of follow through shows children that they don’t need to take their parents seriously

Loss of PrivilegesBoth natural and logical consequences are not

appropriate (dangerous consequences)

Most effective in children 5 and over

If possible, make privilege connect to misbehavior

Time outA short period of time in which a child sits away from other people and the center of activity

A chance to calm down and regain self-control

One minute for each year of the child’s age

Child needs to acknowledge action that resulted in time out.

Poor disciplinary measuresBribing

Promise to behave

Shouting/yelling

Shaming or belittling

Threating to withhold love

Exaggerating consequences.

Bottom lineBe consistent

Clear rules

Helps children know what is expected

Helps children learn trust and confidence

All caregivers should be on the same page