Goosebumps

byDarren Lemke

December 18th, 2012JEFF H

ALL

FADE IN:

EXT. - CHICAGO; LAKESHORE DRIVE - LATE NIGHT

Rain comes down in buckets. A MOVING TRUCK is parked out front of a Gothic, pre-war APARTMENT BUILDING. Stone gargoyles sit perched above. Thunder crashes bringing us to-

INT. - APARTMENT 313; LIVING ROOM

Dark wood. High ceilings. As charming as a haunted mansion. Near deserted, the bare rooms are filled with over-stuffed MOVING BOXES--all marked FRAGILE. Lightning flashes revealing-

AN ANTIQUE DUMMY sealed within a sturdy glass display case. A mischievous grin is frozen on the dummy’s inanimate wooden face like a child with a secret. Then-

A LANKY MOVER loads the display case onto a hand truck.

Nearby, a BURLY MOVER abrasively grabs a box when-

APARTMENT OWNER(o.s.)

Careful with those.

The Burly Mover turns as we reveal a figure in the shadows--for now, we’ll simply know him as the APARTMENT OWNER. In his hand is a STRESS BALL.

APARTMENT OWNERThey’re very delicate.

With that, the Apartment Owner gives the stress ball a squeeze then disappears back into the darkness. The Burly Mover rolls his eyes and follows the Lanky Mover out. As he does we notice that the apartment is badly damaged. Broken floors. Shattered walls. The movers exchange curious glances.

BURLY MOVER(under his breath)

What, did a bulldozer go through this place?

LANKY MOVER(under his breath)

That’s why landlords created security deposits.

With that the two movers continue on their way.

EXT. - STREET - MOMENTS LATER

As the Lanky Mover loads the dummy into the truck-

BURLY MOVERHeads up.

JEFF H

ALL

The Lanky Mover turns as the Burly Mover tosses the box marked “fragile” in his direction. Missing the box, the carton tumbles to the ground, spilling DOZENS OF LEATHER-BOUND MANUSCRIPTS onto the street.

LANKY MOVERNow look what you did...

The two movers pick up the manuscripts and wipe them off. Each is bound shut with a sturdy, REINFORCED LOCK...much like the type you’d find on a diary. Among the titles:

BURLY MOVER“Monster Blood”, “The Werewolf of Fever Swamp”, “The Haunted Mask”...

LANKY MOVERHey, I know these. I used to read them when I was a kid.

The Lanky Mover eyes a book entitled “The Blob That Ate Everyone”. The lock’s been damaged from the fall.

LANKY MOVEROh, man. You busted the lock on this one.

The Burly Mover examines the damaged lock, shrugs, then tosses the book back in the box, placing it in the truck.

LANKY MOVERWhoa. Whoa. What are you doing? That’s property damage. We gotta report it.

BURLY MOVERFor all we know that lock was busted before we got here.Besides,...

The Burly Driver scans the scene for prying eyes then closes the truck’s delivery door.

BURLY MOVERWho’s going to notice?

EXT. - ABANDONED COUNTRY ROAD - LATER THAT NIGHT

Rain falls harder. Thunder crashes louder. The moving truck follows the Apartment Owner’s distant car.

BURLY MOVER(o.s.)

Let me ask you something.

INT. - MOVING TRUCK

The Burly Mover drives while the Lanky Driver reads Mad magazine.

2.

JEFF H

ALL

BURLY MOVERWhat kind of person hires a moving company to move them in the middle of the night?

LANKY MOVERThe same kind of person who puts dead bolts on manuscripts, I guess.

Suddenly, a RUMBLING NOISE is heard from the back of the truck. Upon hearing the noise, the two movers eye each other uncertainly.

LANKY MOVERMaybe a cat crawled inside...

The rumbling gets louder. Whatever it is...it isn’t a cat.

EXT. - ABANDONED ROAD

The moving truck pulls over to the side of the road.

EXT. - MOVING TRUCK

The back doors are pulled open as the movers peers inside. Darkness peers back. The Burly Mover switches on his flashlight, revealing a wall of boxes.

BURLY MOVERIs somebody back there?

Silence. Then-

Something shuffles behind the boxes. Something that doesn’t want to be seen. The two movers exchange uneasy glances.

BURLY MOVER(calling out)

Okay, you got two choices, pal. Either you come out or we come in. You got until three to make up your mind. One...

The tension mounts.

BURLY MOVERTwo...

The moment builds. The Lanky Mover swallows nervously, then-

BURLY MOVERTh-

But before the mover can finish his count--Boom! The back of the truck literally EXPLODES as whatever’s hiding inside bursts out. The impact of the blast sends the moving men tumbling backwards, crashing to the wet pavement.

3.

JEFF H

ALL

As the two mud-covered movers dazedly gather their bearings, a SHADOW grows over them. Growing higher...higher...until-

The movers’ eyes widen. Faces go white. And then-

A MONSTROUS ROAR breaks the silence. The movers scream in horror as the shadow falls upon them, bringing us to-

TITLE CREDITS

As CREDITS roll a series of GOOSEBUMPS BOOK COVERS kaleidoscope across the screen. “The Haunted School”, “It Came From Beneath the Sink”, “The Girl Who Cried Monster”...Just to name a few. Endless tales of terror.

The titles spin and swirl...growing faster and faster...until-

TITLE CREDITS END

Legend reads:

THIRTEEN MONTHS LATER

EXT. - RURAL MARYLAND - MORNING

A hundred miles from Baltimore. A million from Manhattan.

A SEA OF PUMPKINS stretches out alongside a two lane highway. A sign reads:

WELCOME TO NORMAL

POPULATION 1,245

A dusty mini-van roars past, dragging a clanking U-Haul behind it. Passing an ABANDONED AMUSEMENT PARK, the mini-van crosses an old TRESTLE BRIDGE leading to-

EXT. - NORMAL; MAIN STREET

A small town as small as they come. Norman Rockwell would die of boredom. Cornstalks and pumpkins adorn the gazebo in the TOWN SQUARE. Halloween decorations fill shop windows.

INT. - MINI-VAN

Meet GALE and ZACH COOPER. A forty-something mom and her fourteen year-old son. Both ex-Manhattanites. Both look as out of place as they feel. Zach wears a New York Yankees sweatshirt.

Sitting in the child safety seat in the back is MELISSA, Zach’s two year-old sister. Melissa merrily chews on her foot as Zach fiddles with his Iphone, unable to get a signal.

As a dispirited Zach takes in the small town scene-

4.

JEFF H

ALL

ZACHSeriously, mom, are you telling me that they’re not hiring English teachers in Hawaii?

GALENot ones that have two kids to support.

ZACH(serious)

I just hope we’re close to a subway line.

GALE(delicately)

Yeah, about that...

EXT. - SPRINGFIELD AVENUE

Lined with lovely Victorian houses on a private cul-de-sac. Woodlands stretch off behind the homes.

GALE(o.s.)

Alright, kids, last stop.

The mini-van comes to a stop as Zach and Gale exit.

GALEIt might not be much, but,...

We reveal the Cooper family’s new home. A broken-down two-story house. Chipped paint. Shuttered windows. The lawn is thick and overgrown. Gale sighs.

GALE...well, you get the idea.

Zach studies the house uncertainly.

ZACHMunsters go into foreclosure?

GALEIsn’t there a moving box you should be carrying?

Zach grumbles and heads to the U-Haul. As he does-

INT. - NEIGHBOR’S HOME

An UNSEEN FIGURE watches from above.

INT. - COOPER’S HOUSE; FRONT PORCH

Not much better on the inside.

5.

JEFF H

ALL

GALEOkay, so the place could use a little work, but, it is only temporary. Just until we get back on our feet.

A RACCOON rushes out the front door.

MELISSAKitty cat!

Zach eyes his mother uncertainly. Gale puts on a brave face.

GALEEverything’s going to be fine. Really.

INT. - KITCHEN - MOMENTS LATER

Gale turns on the kitchen sink. Pipes clank and spray. Water comes out in brown spurts.

GALE(to Zach; off the sink)

Okay, I’ll grab the toolbox, you grab some towels.

Zach assumes his mom is kidding. She’s not.

GALEWhat? You and your father used to fix the leaky faucet in the bathroom all the time.

ZACHHe fixed the faucet. I held the wrench.

GALEWell, you know what your dad used to say about trying.

ZACHDad used to say a lot of things...

With that, Zach heads into the

LIVING ROOM

Zach sits on the couch, sinking beneath the broken springs. Gale appears with Melissa in her arms. She regards her son gently, putting a loving arm around him. She knows how he’s feeling. She feels it too.

GALEHey, look, Zach,...I know things are a little scary right now, but if we work together and everybody does their part...we can get through this in one piece.

6.

JEFF H

ALL

Gale smiles confidently. Zach doesn’t seem as convinced.

Knock. Knock. Gale and Zach look to see LORRAINE on the front porch--Gale’s bubbly forty-something sister. Lorraine is clearly the “country mouse” to Gale’s “city mouse”.

LORRAINENormal Welcoming Committee!

Zach notices that Lorraine’s hand bag is made from denim jeans and sea shells. Bedazzled to nauseam.

ZACHI see Aunt Lorraine’s still designing her own hand bags.

GALEBe nice.

Gale opens the door. The two sisters hug.

LORRAINEOh my gosh, I can’t believe you’re really here!

GALEThanks to you.

LORRAINEWell, hey, what’s the point of being on the Board of Education if you don’t have some say in who’s doing the educating.(to Melissa)Hey, there, little girl!(off Zach; playfully)And this must be the man of the house.

ZACHHey, Aunt Lorraine.

Lorraine gives Zach a welcoming hug.

LORRAINEI swear, you look more like your father every time I see you.

Zach shuffles uncomfortably at this notion, then-

ZACHWell, I guess I better start unpacking...

With that, Zach starts outside, cell phone in hand.

ZACH(off the cell)

Hey, what’s going on with the cell phone service around here? I haven’t been able to get a signal since we got here.

7.

JEFF H

ALL

LORRAINEWell, of course not, silly. No one can.

ZACHWhat do you mean “no one can”?

LORRAINE(to Gale)

Oh,...he doesn’t know?

GALE(avoiding)

Well, we were just getting settled in, so I thought-

ZACHDoesn’t know what?

A reluctant beat, then-

GALEThat Normal’s part of the NRAO.(sheepishly explains)The National Radio Quiet Zone. Something to do with a radio telescope down in Green Bank...

Zach frantically channels through his Iphone. No cell phone service, no wi-fi service...

ZACHYou gotta be kidding me...

LORRAINEYou know, it’s actually not so bad once you get used to it. It certainly makes going to the movies a lot more peaceful.

ZACH(desperately)

Mom...

GALE(weakly)

It’s only temporary. Just-

ZACH-until we get back on our feet. I remember.

With that, Zach storms outside. Gale helplessly watches him go when-

LORRAINE(cheerfully; to Gale)

I got you a house warming gift.

With that, Lorraine holds up an exact replica of her horrendous-looking home-made hand bag. Gale forces an excited smile.

8.

JEFF H

ALL

EXT. - DRIVEWAY

Zach angrily unloads boxes from the U-Haul and places them in the driveway when-

The contents of one box tumbles out the bottom and onto the ground. Zach sighs. It’s endless. As Zach bends down and begins cleaning up the mess-

HANNAH(o.s.)

They say your house is haunted, you know.

Zach turns to see a fourteen year-old girl in the upstairs window of the neighboring house. Dark-hair. Pretty. Wears a BROKEN-HEART NECKLACE. Her name is HANNAH.

Zach offers Hannah an incredulous look.

HANNAHIt’s true. The last owner was an escaped mental patient who chopped up his entire family with a rusty Cuisinart. They say on moonlit nights you can still hear the sounds of his victims being pureed.

A chilling beat, then-

ZACHYou’re kidding.

HANNAHCompletely. He was an interior decorator. On weekends he taught needlepoint at the senior center.

ZACH(amused)

Has anyone ever told you that you have a morbid sense of humor?

HANNAHOnly the ones who can’t take a joke.

Hannah smiles. Zach smiles back. Then-

SHIVERSHannah.

A new figure appears beside Hannah--Zach’s fifty-something neighbor, MR. SHIVERS. Dressed in a tweed jacket and horn-rimmed glasses. Both composed and calm, he is the epitome of a “cool customer”. We notice that he holds a stress ball in his hand.

SHIVERSDon’t you have some homework to do?

9.

JEFF H

ALL

With that, Hannah slinks away. Once gone, Shivers turns his attention to Zach. As he sticks his head out the window-

SHIVERS(calmly)

Do you see that fence?

Zach eyes the WROUGHT-IRON fence that divides the property line. He nods.

SHIVERS(calmly)

It’s private property. So’s everything on the other side of it. That includes my niece. Remember that and we won’t have any problems. (smiles)Welcome to the neighborhood.

With that, Shivers gives the stress ball a few squeezes, then retreats back inside, drawing the blinds as he goes. Zach stands alone.

ZACHAnd they say New Yorkers are unfriendly...

EXT. - COOPER HOUSE - THAT NIGHT

NEWSCASTER(v.o.)

This just in--a fire has broken out at the Landmark Theater on Houston Street. News Eleven is there on the scene.

INT. - COOPER HOUSE; LIVING ROOM

A box filled with Zach’s dad’s things are opened. Awards. Decorations. All NYFD related. A MEMORIAL PLAQUE dated the previous year can be seen.

An empty VHS TAPE box reads “DAD ON TV”. Nearby, an old VCR is hooked up to a portable TV. Zach sits and watches. On the screen an old NEWS BROADCAST plays.

REPORTERWe’re here on Houston Street and as you can see behind me the fire is spreading quickly between the theater and the surrounding buildings. Let’s see if we can get a closer look.

As they do-

FIREFIGHTERS scramble as ZACH’S DAD gives the orders--the fire chief on the scene.

10.

JEFF H

ALL

ZACH’S DAD(to FIREFIGHTERS)

Joe, Sal, I want you to hit that fire head on. Go high in the ceiling and don’t let up until you see sky.

(to CON ED WORKER)Frank, I need you to cut the power and gas to the entire block.

(to a POLICE MAN)Serge, let’s clear those sidewalks.

(to the CAMERA)Sorry, guys. That includes you too.

Both, charming and assertive Zach’s dad is a born leader.

ZACH’S DAD(to all)

Alright, people, what are we waiting for? Let’s look busy.

Just then a GIRL’S SCREAM is heard coming from inside the theater. Alarmed, Zach’s Dad reacts.

ZACH’S DAD(to a firefighter)

I thought you said that theater was empty.

Wasting no time for a response, Zach’s dad bravely races into the blaze, then momentarily races out with a rattled TEEN GIRL in his arms.

NEWSCASTER(v.o.)

No injuries were reported.

Zach pauses the screen and eyes his dad proudly. A true hero.

GALE(o.s.)

Zach.

Zach quickly shuts off the TV as Gale appears on the stairs.

GALEI thought I heard voices.

ZACHNope. Just me. What’s up?

GALEI need your help with something.

INT. - MELISSA’S BEDROOM

As Melissa settles in for bed, Zach appears. Gale hands Zach a worn copy of “Good Night Moon”.

ZACHWhat’s this?

11.

JEFF H

ALL

GALE“Good Night Moon.”

ZACHI know what it is. I mean, why are you giving it to me?

GALEWell, who better to read your sister’s favorite bedtime story then her favorite brother?

ZACHMe? But dad always...

Zach trails off, clearly uncomfortable with the idea.

ZACHYou know, bedtime stories were never really my thing...(hands book back to Gale)But, let me know when you guys break out the Chutes and Ladders.

An awkward beat, then-

ZACHWell, I still have that garbage to take out...

With that, Zach leaves. Gale sighs, disappointed, then begins to read the story to Melissa herself.

EXT. - ZACH’S HOUSE; STREET

Zach clumsily carries the over-stuffed trash bags towards the garbage cans when--Crash! A garbage bag bursts, spilling trash all over the front lawn. Zach sighs.

HANNAH(o.s.)

Guess it’s just not your day.

Zach turns to see Hannah standing on the other side of the BARRED, WROUGHT-IRON FENCE that divides the property line. As Zach starts picking up the trash-

ZACHIt’s not my year.(beat)You know, we really have to stop meeting like this.

Hannah grins, amused.

HANNAHI’d offer you a hand, but “Cellblock Shivers” went into full lock down twenty minutes ago. Lights off at ten. Security system on at nine.

12.

JEFF H

ALL

ZACHSo, how did you-

HANNAHThe cellar doors. I disconnected the alarm months ago.

ZACHJeez,...and I thought my house was a prison.

HANNAHYou should try being home-schooled.

Zach submits. Clearly, Hannah has it worse.

HANNAHBelieve it or not, my uncle’s not so bad once you get to know him. He’s just a little...over-protective.

ZACHI never would’ve guessed. (beat)Wait. So if Shivers is your uncle, then where are your-

Hannah’s expression grows sad. Zach knows the look, having seen it in his own face.

ZACH...Oh. Sorry.

HANNAHIt happens.

ZACHI know. Happened to my dad too.(shrugs)He was a fireman. Guess it goes with the territory.

HANNAHToo bad we didn’t meet earlier. We could’ve gotten a group rate on grief counseling.(catches herself)Wow, that was insensitive. I’m so sorry. My uncle says I have this terrible habit of using humor as a defense mechanism...which is probably why I always screw-up at making new friends.

ZACH“Anyone who doesn’t screw-up isn’t trying hard enough.”

Hannah stares confused. Zach explains.

13.

JEFF H

ALL

ZACH...Just something my dad used to say.

HANNAHSo, is that why you guys moved? Because of your dad, I mean.

ZACHWell, my mom will tell you it was because of work or, more specifically, lack thereof,...but, truth is, I just don’t think she could stand another day living in that apartment. Too many memories, I guess.

HANNAHIt must be hard.

ZACHWhat’s that?

HANNAHWell, you know, being the “man of the house” and all.

ZACHMe? “Man of the house”? (amused)I’m fourteen. I can’t even open a pickle jar without running warm water over it first.

Hannah chuckles as Zach continues to clean up the trash.

ZACHNo, my dad was the only man in our house. He was the one who fixed the leaky faucets,...read the bedtime stories,...put out the fires--both figuratively and literally. (beat)There wasn’t anything he couldn’t do.

Zach finishes dumping the last of the garbage in the can.

ZACHNow, me, on the other hand...Well, let’s just say that I’m not my dad. I just wish everyone else would realize that too.

HANNAHWell, maybe they just see something in you that you don’t.

A sweet sentiment. Zach appreciates it. Then-

14.

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ALL

HANNAHWell, I better get going before my uncle decides to release the hounds. (off Zach’s grin)You think I’m kidding?

As Hannah hurries away-

ZACHHey. I’m Zach.

HANNAHHannah.

Hannah smiles. Zach smiles back. And, with that, Hannah disappears into the night. Zach stands alone, having finally found someone he can relate to...another soul trapped in Normal.

After a beat Zach turns to head inside when he walks smack dab into--

Shivers. Zach jumps, startled. A calm Shivers smiles casually.

SHIVERSI’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to startle you.(beat)I was just throwing out the trash and I thought I heard voices...

ZACH(cautiously)

I guess you must be hearing things.

Shivers studies Zach suspiciously, then-

SHIVERSYou know, the ancient pagans believed that night was a time of death and sorrow. A time when the gods departed from this world and mankind was at their most vulnerable.(beat)You should try remembering that the next time your out so late. Because as any ancient pagan will tell you...anything can happen after dark.

An ominous beat.

ZACH...right.

With that, an uneasy Zach heads back inside. Shivers just watches him go, the smile never leaving his face.

15.

JEFF H

ALL

EXT. - ZACH’S HOUSE - THE NEXT MORNING

Gale buckles Melissa in the car as Zach readies his SKATEBOARD.

GALE(to Melissa)

It’s okay, baby. You’re going to spend that day with aunt Lo Lo.

(to Zach)You sure you don’t want a lift?

ZACHA lift from my mom on the first day of school? Please. As if having my mother as an English teacher isn’t bad enough...

GALEOkay. Suit yourself.

With that, Zach and Gale head off.

EXT. - MAIN STREET; NORMAL

As Zach skateboards down Main Street he stops before a sign that points toward the distant school....three miles away.

Zach’s jaw drops as Gale passes in her car, merrily beeping the horn twice as she goes. Zach sighs and keeps skateboarding.

EXT. - NORMAL HIGH SCHOOL - A LITTLE LATER

A plaque out front reveals the building’s historic significance as a fort in the revolutionary war.

An exhausted and sweat-covered Zach rolls up on his skateboard as the school bell rings. Yup, Zach’s late on his first day.

As Zach races inside a WHISTLE blows bringing us to-

INT. - GYMNASIUM - A LITTLE LATER

COACH GARRISON, Normal’s out-of-shape-but-thinks-he’s-not gym teacher addresses his CLASS.

COACH GARRISONAlright, settle down. We have a new student joining us today. Everyone say hello to Zach Cooper.

A reluctant beat, then-

A humiliated Zach reluctantly steps out of the locker room, revealing that his misspelled gym shirt reads “POOPER” instead of “COOPER”. Needless to say, laughter ensues.

16.

JEFF H

ALL

COACH GARRISON(to class)

Okay, that’s enough.(to Zach)Sorry about the misprint, Cooper, but don’t worry, that new uniform will be here in just another two to four weeks. (blows whistle)Alright, let’s play ball.

With that, a dodge ball hits Zach in the face. Wham!

MR. CAMPBELL(o.s.)

Fear.

INT. - CHEMISTRY LAB - AFTERNOON

Class is in session. MR. CAMPBELL teaches. Zach sits in the back. His forehead is red and swollen.

MR. CAMPBELLEverybody has something they’re afraid of. Fear of snakes. Fear of rejection. Fear of today’s pop quiz.

The class reacts accordingly.

MR. CAMPBELLKidding. The point is--although everybody’s fear may be different, they all have one thing in common--epinephrine. The chemical component of fear. A scaredy cat’s worst nightmare. An adrenaline junkie’s best friend.

Mr. Campbell takes a sip out of a nearby ENERGY DRINK.

MR. CAMPBELLAlso tastes pretty good in an energy drink.

As Zach listens to Mr. Campbell’s lecture-

DUNCANPss. Hey.

Zach turns to see a heavy-set teen wearing a Spider-Man T-shirt. Name’s DUNCAN. His notebooks are filled with comic book inspired drawings. Duncan clumsily tries to act “urban”.

DUNCANWhat up with ya cu-cu, b?

Zach stares confused. Equally confused, Duncan drops the act.

DUNCANI thought you were from New York.

17.

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ZACHI am.

DUNCANDon’t New Yorkers talk like that?

ZACHI don’t think anyone talks like that. (introducing himself)Zach.

DUNCANDuncan.(tries again)A-yo, playa.

Again, Zach stares confused.

DUNCANNo?

Zach shakes his head. With that, a ringing bell brings us to-

EXT. - NORMAL HIGH; CAFETERIA - AFTERNOON

GARLIC MASHED POTATOES are slopped onto trays by CAFETERIA WORKERS as Duncan and Zach move through the throngs of teens, lunch trays in hand. Teens chuckle as Zach passes--the tale of “Cooper the Pooper” having spread like wildfire.

DUNCANWow. To go from Queens, New York to Normal, Maryland...And I thought my luck was bad. (beat)Hey, so, back in New York you must’ve went to a lot of cool parties, huh?

ZACHCool parties?

DUNCANYou know, hangin’ at the clubs... hooking up with the honeys....

ZACHI think you’re getting my life mixed up with Gossip Girl.

Just then--A RUBBER-FACED GHOUL jumps up in front of Duncan and shrieks. Startled, Duncan reacts, dropping his tray and spilling his lunch everywhere. The Ghoul pulls off his Halloween mask to reveal the laughing DAVIDSON--the fifteen year-old star of the Normal wrestling team.

DAVIDSONJeez, Duncan, even my grandmother doesn’t scare that easy.

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ZACH(to Davidson)

Hey, man. That’s not funny.

DAVIDSONRelax, Pooper. I was only messin’ with him.

Alison, Davidson’s attractive fifteen year-old girlfriend bends down and helps Duncan gather his lunch--clearly disapproving of Davidson’s actions.

ALISONAre you okay, Donald?

DUNCANOh, yeah, sure. Fine.(off Davidson; acting cool)He was just “messin’ with me”.

Alison offers Duncan a kind smile as a chuckling Davidson and his POSSE move on, bumping Zach as they go-

DUNCAN(to Alison)

Oh, and it’s “Duncan” by the way.You know, like the doughnut.(to himself)...or like the person you’ve sat in front of since third grade.

Zach bends down and helps Duncan collect his things, generously putting half of his sandwich on Duncan’s tray.

ZACHI wasn’t that hungry anyway.

Duncan offers a grateful nod. Then-

DUNCANHey, check it out.

Zach does. In the distance, a sixty-something PRINCIPAL CHAPMAN gives Gale a guided tour of the school.

DUNCANThe new English teacher. I hear she’s a real bitch.

ZACH...That’s my mom.

DUNCAN(thinks Zach’s kidding)

Right. And my dad’s the janitor.

Gale waves to Zach. Zach weakly waves back. Duncan suddenly realizes that Zach isn’t kidding. An awkward beat, then-

DUNCANDid I mention that I’m not very popular?

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ZACHI never would’ve guessed.

Zach smiles. Duncan does the same.

EXT. - MAIN STREET - LATE AFTERNOON

Duncan gives Zach the fifty-cent tour of town, showcasing everything from the LOCAL SHOPS to the VILLAGE GREEN.

DUNCAN...And on your left is the Normal movie theater, where the only thing staler than the films they show is the popcorn.

The two stop in front of CITY HALL.

DUNCANThat concludes our tour of Normal. If you’d like any more information regarding boredom, monotony, and complacency...be sure visit our local borough hall. Any questions?

ZACHYeah. How do I get out of this place?

DUNCANI’ve been asking myself the same question for fourteen years.

A horn honks. Zach looks up to see DUNCAN’S MOM in a nearby Prius. The back bumper is filled with bumper stickers promoting “organic” this and “vegan” that.

DUNCANWell, I better get going. My mom and dad are going to Pennsylvania for the weekend and they need to give me the obligatory lecture on maturity and responsibility.

ZACHWhat’s in Pennsylvania?

DUNCAN...An aroma therapy convention.(embarrassed)I’ve learned to stop asking.

With that, Duncan hops in his mom’s car. Alone, Zach takes in his surroundings when he notices something across the street-

Mr. Shivers--exiting the local hardware store. In his arms is a large cardboard box. Fumbling with his car keys, a pile of CHAINS, SHACKLES, and ROPE fall out of the box and onto the sidewalk. Zach stares curiously when-

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JEFF H

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Sensing that he’s being watched, Shivers turns in Zach’s direction. Zach quickly skateboards away. Shivers just watches him go.

EXT. - COOPER HOUSE - NIGHT

An autumn breezes sends fallen leaves fluttering.

GALE(o.s.)

Look, Zach, I know today was only your first day, but Normal’s our home now and, sooner or later, you’re going to have to start giving this place a chance.

INT. - COOPER HOUSE; KITCHEN

Sitting in her high chair, Melissa makes a playful mess as Gale attempts to fix the sink using a “Plumbing For Idiots” guide. Zach stands above her.

GALEAnd I don’t see why some misspelled gym shirt has anything to do with why you’re not going to the Halloween Dance tomorrow night.

A blank-faced Zach holds up his uniform revealing the infamous “Pooper” misprint. A dead-pan beat, then-

GALEOkay, now I see.

ZACHHey, how about I make you a deal: I’ll watch Melissa while you’re playing chaperone...(before Gale can interject)...and I promise to be the first one on line for the Christmas social.

An uncertain pause. Gale sighs, then-

GALE...Deal.

With that settled, Zach grabs a muffin off the counter when-

Wham! Startled, Zach looks outside to see Mr. Shivers pounding a stake in his front lawn with a sledge hammer. Wham! Once done, Shivers retreats back inside. Weird...

ZACHHey, so, what do you know about our next-door neighbor?

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GALEWho, Mr. Shivers? (beat)Well, let’s see. According to your aunt--he moved in last year. He’s single. Keeps to himself. Always recycles and never misses a “Fried Chicken Friday” at Ray’s Diner.

ZACHJeez, I knew Aunt Lorraine was a gossip, but not a stalker. Is there anything she left out?

GALEOnly that Mr. Shivers makes a great blueberry muffin.(off the muffin Zach’s eating)He dropped those off this morning.

Suddenly appalled, Zach discreetly spits the muffin out.

GALEYou know, I think your aunt might have a little crush on Mr. Shivers.

ZACH(sarcastically)

Well,...who could blame her?

With that, Gale finishes tightening a lug nut on the sink.

GALEOkay, stand back. I think I got it.

Turning on the faucet, water bursts everywhere. After a soaked Gale manages to stop the geyser from flowing-

ZACHWhy don’t you just call a plumber?

GALEBecause it’d be cheaper to build a new house around the old sink. (offers Zach the wrench)Care to give it a whirl?

Zach eyes the wrench. The sink. An uncertain beat, then-

ZACH...I’d probably just make it worse.

GALEI’d like to see you try.

But before Zach can respond, Melissa knocks over her milk.

GALEOh, honey...

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Gale cleans up Melissa’s mess and dumps the wet paper towels into the over-stuffed garbage. As Gale prepares to bring the garbage bag outside-

ZACH(eagerly)

That’s okay. I got it.

Grabbing the bag, Zach starts out when he notices that his mother is staring at him.

ZACHWhat?

GALENothing. It’s just that I’ve never seen you so excited to take out the garbage before.

ZACH(defensively)

I’m not excited.

With that, Zach heads outside, trying to play it cool. As he does, Gale turns to see that Melissa’s hair is covered with mashed potatoes.

GALEOh, no, baby, the food goes in your mouth, not your hair.

EXT. - COOPER HOUSE - A FEW MOMENTS LATER

As a full moon hangs high above, Zach waits in the shadows, hoping to run into Hannah as he did the night before. Zach waits...and waits...then-

Realizing that Hannah won’t be making an appearance, a discouraged Zach sulks as he slinks toward the garbage cans and throws out the trash. Clunk. And then, as Zach puts the cover back on the can-

A GIRL’S BLOOD-CURDLING SCREAM pierces the night.

Startled, Zach spins around. Did he really just hear that? And, then, as if on cue--

The SCREAM is heard again. Coming from next door. As Zach’s eyes find the WINDOW from where the screams are coming-

SHAPES and SHADOWS hurriedly move behind the curtains of Mr. Shivers’s house. Glass is heard breaking. Wood snapping. And then, something else is heard--

A ROAR. Guttural. Primal. Ferocious.

Zach goes white. And then, as the strange, HORRIFYING ROAR reaches a fever pitch-

Silence resumes as the light in Shivers’s house goes out. Frozen, Zach stands in his driveway, heart pounding when-

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A HAND falls on Zach’s shoulder. Zach jumps.

GALE(o.s.)

What, did you get lost?

Zach spins around to see his mom standing behind him.

GALEHow long does it take to throw out trash?

ZACHDid you hear that??

GALEHear what?

Gale listens. Not so much as a cricket chirps. With that, Zach bolts inside.

GALEZach!

INT. - COOPER HOUSE; KITCHEN

Zach races and in grabs his cell phone. He dials 911. A confused Gale rushes in behind him.

GALEZach...

ZACHI heard someone scream. I think Hannah’s in trouble.

GALE(suddenly concerned)

Who’s Hannah?

ZACHOur neighbor. Are pet lions legal in Maryland?

GALEWhat??

Remembering that his cell phone is useless, Zach grabs the land line as Gale grabs Zach.

GALEZach, you’re scaring me. Now, calm down, take a deep breath, and tell me what’s going on.

ZACHI have a better idea...(dials 911)Let our neighbor tell you.

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EXT. - MR. SHIVERS HOUSE; FRONT PORCH - MOMENTS LATER

Knock. Knock. The front door opens to reveal a calm-looking Mr. Shivers, holding a cup of chamomile tea. Zach, his mom, and OFFICER BROOKS and STEVENS are there.

OFFICER STEVENSMr. Shivers?

SHIVERSYes?

OFFICER BROOKSWe’re sorry to bother you, sir, but this young man reported overhearing some kind of a domestic disturbance.

SHIVERSDomestic disturbance? Here? I’m afraid there must be some kind of mistake. I’ve been home alone all night.

On those words, a WOMAN’S SCREAMS pierces the night. Comes from inside. The officers eye Shivers accusingly. Zach appears vindicated.

OFFICER BROOKSWould you mind if we came in?

INT. - SHIVERS HOME; DEN

A WOMAN screams in terror as a half-shark/half-spider mutation (known as a SHARK-RANTULA) pursues.

A MUTE button is hit as we realize that the images come from a TV screen. Shivers and the others stand inside.

SHIVERS(off the TV)

Surround sound eight-point-one. I just hooked it up this morning.

GALE(to Zach)

Well, there you have it. Mystery solved.

(to Shivers)We’re so sorry for bothering you.

ZACH(to the officers)

That’s not what I heard.

OFFICER STEVENS(to Shivers)

Is there anybody else living on the premises?

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SHIVERSNone that I’m aware of.

ZACHWhat about Hannah?

SHIVERSHannah? I’m afraid there’s no one by that name living here.

But before Zach can respond-

SHIVERSThat is, at least not anymore.(to the officers)Hannah’s my niece. She was staying with me for a while until her parents got settled overseas. I drove her to the airport myself this morning.

ZACHWhat? That’s bullshit.

GALE(scolding)

Zach.

SHIVERS(to the Officers)

I’d be happy to call her if you’d like...although Budapest is an eighteen-hour flight.

A pensive beat, then-

OFFICER STEVENS(to Mr. Shivers)

You mind if we take a look around?

Shivers smiles coolly.

SHIVERSNot at all.

Officer Brooks notices the DOZENS OF LOCKS AND CHAINS that line the front door,...the state of the art security system on the wall...the reinforced bars on the windows...

OFFICER BROOKSWhoa. That’s a pretty serious security system you got here.

SHIVERSWell, these days you can’t be too careful...

Officer Stevens studies the book shelves, all filled with all sorts of ANTIQUE JUNK from all over the world. Odd, eclectic,...and just plain creepy-looking.

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OFFICER STEVENS(off the antique junk)

So, uh,...what line of work are you in, Mr. Shivers?

SHIVERSI’m a writer. Well, I should say that I was. I’m...retired.

OFFICER STEVENSMy brother’s a writer. Writes greeting cards. Well, condolence cards, actually...For pets.

Awkward silence, then-

SHIVERSWell, if there isn’t anything else I can help you officers with-

ZACHWhat’s in there?

Attention turns toward TWO WOODEN SLIDING DOORS.

SHIVERSIn there? Oh, that’s just my study.

Zach notices that the calm-looking Stine is squeezing that stress ball pretty hard...

The officers try the study doors. Locked. Shivers grabs some nearby keys off a shelf.

SHIVERSHere, let me get that for you. You’ll have to forgive the mess.It’s being fumigated for spiders.

OFFICER STEVENS(suddenly uneasy)

Spiders?

SHIVERSBlack widows mostly. Nasty little devils. They get in everything. Shoes. Hair...Holsters.(unlocks the doors)Try not to inhale.

Shivers dramatically holds his breath and is about to open the study doors when-

OFFICER STEVENSYou know, on second thought...I think we’ve seen all we need to see.

ZACHWhat??

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SHIVERSAre you sure? It’s no trouble. Really. By now all the big ones are probably asleep.

OFFICER STEVENSNo. No. That’s alright. We’ve taken up enough of your time as it is.

OFFICER BROOKSYeah, just be sure to keep that surround sound of yours down to a reasonable volume.

As Shivers re-locks the study-

ZACHNo! Listen to me. I heard screams. Real screams, not some lady on TV. There was a scream, then a roar, then a-

SHIVERSA roar?

All eyes fall on Zach. Suddenly Zach is starting to sound as stupid as he feels. Shivers almost seems to be grinning.

GALEYou never mentioned anything about a roar, Zach.

Losing credibility by the second, Zach makes a Hail Mary play, rushing past Shivers and pounding on the study door.

ZACHHannah! Hannah!

OFFICER STEVENSOkay, kid, that’s enough.

As the officers escort the struggling Zach outside-

ZACHLook, I know what I heard. I know what I heard!

Gale and Shivers are alone. Gale forces a strained smile.

GALEYou’ll have to forgive, Zach. He’s been under a lot of pressure lately. Between school and the move...(awkward beat)When we get settled in we’ll have you over for coffee.

After an uncomfortable beat, a red-faced Gale moves out.

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EXT. - MR. SHIVERS HOUSE; FRONT LAWN - MOMENTS LATER

As the officers move into their patrol car-

OFFICER STEVENS(to Zach)

You did the right thing by calling us, kid.

OFFICER BROOKSJust don’t ever let it happen again.

With that, the car pulls away as Gale and Zach stand alone. Gale puts a comforting arm around Zach.

GALEC’mon, honey, let’s go home.

As Gale leads Zach home, Zach notices that Shivers is watching him from behind a drawn curtain. Zach and Shivers lock eyes. Then-

Shivers closes the curtain.

EXT. - NORMAL HIGH SCHOOL; CAFETERIA - AFTERNOON (HALLOWEEN)

JACK O’ LANTERNS grin. PLASTIC SKELETONS sneer. Decorations are hung for the evening’s Halloween dance as teens loiter about in their costumes, Davidson and Alison among them. Davison playfully wrestles with his WRESTLING PALS.

Duncan and Zach sit at their usual table. Duncan’s dressed like a woefully unthreatening Hulk.

ZACH(summing up)

I’m telling you, I know what I heard...and Shivers knows it too.

DUNCANDude, that is messed up.

Zach notices that Duncan is referring to Alison and Davidson.

DUNCAN(off Davidson)

I mean what does Alison see in that guy anyway?

ZACHHey, did you hear a word I just said?

DUNCAN(turning back to Zach)

Huh? Oh, yeah. Missing girl. Creepy neighbor. That’s messed up too.

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ZACHI mean, what does anyone really know about this Shivers guy anyway? Who is he? Where did he come from? Just because he’s somehow managed to convince everyone in town that he’s just your typical suburbanite transplant doesn’t mean he is one. Everybody has a few skeletons lying in their closet, and, in Shivers’s case,...that might not be just a figure of speech.

DUNCANWell, I wouldn’t worry about it.Sooner or later, the truth will come out. Guys like that always crack. The pressure just gets too much for them.

ZACHNo. No way. Not Shivers. This guy’s so cool he sweats snowflakes.

Zach considers the situation long and hard, then-

ZACHIf my dad thought someone was in trouble there wasn’t anything he wouldn’t do to try to help them.

Zach eyes Duncan, determined.

ZACHDuncan,...we have to find a way to get into that house.

DUNCAN(are you kidding me?)

We?

ZACH(no, I’m not kidding you)

We.

A troubled beat, then-

DUNCANI think I liked things better when I didn’t have any friends.

EXT. - MAIN STREET - EARLY EVENING

As Main Street gets ready for trick-or-treaters-

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EXT. - COOPER HOUSE

GALE(o.s.)

Plans? What do you mean “you have plans”?

INT. - COOPER HOUSE; KITCHEN

Zach and Gale are there. As usual Gale’s juggling three things at once--adjusting Melissa’s angel costume, decorating cupcakes for the Halloween dance, and wrapping a rag around the ruptured sink pipe.

ZACHHey, you were the one who said I should start giving this place a chance.

GALESo you pick tonight? Zach, you knew I had to chaperone the dance tonight. So now who’s going to watch your sister?

ZACHI was kinda hoping that maybe Aunt Lorraine could do it.

GALEAunt Lorraine? Zach, just yesterday you promised me that-

Gale stops. Takes a breath.

GALEYou know what? It’s fine. I’m glad you’re making friends. I’ll just drop Melissa off at your Aunt Lorraine’s right after I go to the supermarket.(thinking aloud)..and the cleaners...(thinking aloud)...and the bank...(thinking aloud)...and the hardware store.

Overburdened, Gale’s head spins. Still, she puts on a warm smile for Zach.

GALEI love you. Have fun.

Gale kisses Zach on the cheek as she picks up Melissa in one arm and grabs the tray of cupcakes in the other.

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GALE(to Melissa; brightly)

C’mon, sweetie, grab your wings. We’re going to go see your aunt Lo-Lo.

With that, Gale heads out. Once she’s gone, Zach pulls out a Spiderman walkie-talkie from his back pack. Clearly, one of Duncan’s.

ZACHWe’re green to go.

DUNCAN(o.s.; walkie-talkie)

What?

ZACHJust get over here.

Zach puts the walkie-talkie away when-

Crash! Zach looks outside to see that Gale has dropped the cupcake tray. Melissa sits in the back seat of the car and cries as Gale picks up the fallen cupcakes, salvaging whatever she can.

The overwhelmed Gale is on the verge of losing it when she notices Zach watching. She quickly dries her swelling eyes and smiles.

GALEIt’s fine. Everything’s fine.

With that, Gale quickly heads out and drives away.

EXT. - SHIVERS HOME - A LITTLE LATER

A “No tricks. No treats. No trespassing.” sign hangs on the wooden stake that Shivers hammered into his front yard, keeping away any would-be trick-or-treaters.

DUNCAN(o.s.)

I don’t know how I let you talk me into this.

Having hopped the fence, Zach and Duncan hide in the shrubbery of the backyard. Their gazes are fixed on the house.

DUNCANYou know, I could be at the Halloween dance right now.

ZACHI thought you said you wouldn’t be caught dead there.

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DUNCANWell, I’d rather be caught dead there than here.

ZACHRelax, I’ll be in and out before anyone even knows I was there. Besides, this is a girl’s life we’re talking about here...

Just then a perturbed Mr. Shivers exits his house, locks the door, and heads into his car. Duncan watches.

DUNCANWhere’s Shivers going?

ZACHRay’s Diner. (shrugs)It’s “Fried Chicken Friday”.

Once Shivers’s car pulls away-

ZACHCome on.

EXT. - SHIVERS HOUSE; CELLAR DOORS

Sticking close to the shadows, Zach and Duncan head toward the steel cellar doors. Zach uses a butter knife to unfasten the latch between the door jamb.

DUNCANWait. How do you know there isn’t an alarm?

ZACHHannah told me she disconnected it.

With a hollow click, the latch becomes unfastened. Zach pockets the butter knife and slowly opens the creaking cellar doors. Silence. Zach peers down into the darkness below.

ZACH(off walkie-talkie)

Okay. All you have to do is just wait here and let me know when Shivers comes back. Got it?

DUNCANYeah. Got it.

Duncan is clearly petrified. Zach attempts to reassure him.

ZACHHey. Haven’t you always wanted to act like one of those super heroes you’re always reading about?(beat)Well, here’s your chance.

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With that, Zach disappears inside. Duncan waits alone.

DUNCAN(to himself; nervously)

...Hooray.

INT. - SHIVERS’S HOUSE; BASEMENT

Zach turns on a flashlight revealing a musty cellar cluttered with junk. Cobwebs hang. Spiders scuttle. Although clearly rattled, Zach tries to remain calm.

ZACH(to himself; whispers)

Okay, just relax. You can do this. After all, your dad used to break into houses and rescue people all the time...and most of those houses were on fire. (beat)Of course, your dad probably didn’t talk to himself the whole time while he was doing it...

As Zach steps forward, he accidentally bumps into a broom. The broom falls to the floor when-

Snap! Snap! Snap! A series of BEAR TRAPS go off. Zach looks down to see that the basement is filled with them. Zach studies the steel minefield uneasily when-

Zach turns to see an OMINOUS FIGURE standing in the darkness right behind him. Startled, Zach jumps as we reveal-

DUNCANDude, take it easy. It’s just me.

ZACHWhat are you doing in here? I thought I told you wait outside.

DUNCANYeah, well, apparently, the only thing less terrifying than waiting outside alone...was coming in here with you.

Duncan notices the junk in the basement. Chains, ropes, shackles...

DUNCANWhat is all this stuff?

ZACHYou got me.

Suddenly, noise is heard from upstairs. Someone walking. Zach smiles.

ZACHI knew she wasn’t in Budapest...

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With that, Zach heads upstairs.

DUNCAN(confused)

Who lives in Budapest?

Duncan nervously follows. As they do we notice a concealed MOTION DETECTOR on the bottom of the staircase. As the two pass by, a red light goes on. Meanwhile...

INT. - RAY’S DINER

Mr. Shivers sits alone in the back of the diner reading a book of Edgar Allan Poe poems. A WAITRESS appears.

WAITRESSYour usual Mr. Shivers?

SHIVERSYes. Thanks you.

As the waitress moves on, Mr. Shivers’s phone vibrates. The display is flashing. Words read: ALARM #3 ACTIVATED

Shivers’s jaw drops as the waitress returns.

WAITRESSOh, and did you want fries with-

But Shivers is already gone.

INT. - SHIVER’S HOUSE; LIVING ROOM

The keys to the study hang on the same hook as the night before. Zach grabs them. Moves towards the study. As Zach unlocks the study doors-

ZACHYou better stand back. I don’t know what we’re gonna find in there.

With that, Zach pulls open the study doors to reveal-

DUNCANWhoa...

A LIBRARY

Dusty, spacious, and stuffed with HUNDREDS OF LEATHER-BOUND MANUSCRIPTS fitted with steel locks (the same as we saw in the opening.) Bookcase after bookcase is filled with them.

Duncan and Zach slowly move into the dim library and take in the scene. Duncan approaches the books.

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DUNCAN“The Scarecrow Walks at Midnight”, “The Ghost Next Door”, “Night of the Living Dummy”...(To Zach)Dude, these are the original manuscripts for every Goosebumps book every written.

ZACH“Goosebumps”? That’s what Shivers was hiding in here? A bunch of children’s books?

DUNCANHey, for your information, Goosebumps aren’t children’s books. Children’s books help you fall asleep at night, not keep you awake until morning. (off the books)Dude, what you’re looking at is a collection of some of the scariest stories ever written.

Zach scans the manuscripts as well as the author’s name.

ZACHR.L. Stine. Is he the same guy who wrote all of these?

DUNCANSure did. Practically built an empire off them too. Toys, video games, TV shows...And then, one day...

ZACHAnd then, one day, what?

DUNCANWell, that’s just it. No one really knows. Some say he retired. Some say he got a fatal case of writer’s block. All anybody really knows for sure is that he dropped off the grid about ten years ago and no one’s seen or heard from him since.

ZACHOkay, so what’s Mr. Shivers doing with R.L. Stine’s original manuscripts?

DUNCANHey, some people collect comic books...

Zach notices some mail on a nearby desk. Mostly bills. All addressed to “Richard Louis Shivers”.

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ZACH(suspiciously)

I guess...

Duncan and Zach slowly move through the gloomy scene. Zach studies the books curiously, most notably the LOCKS.

ZACHWhat are all the locks for?

DUNCANProbably to protect them. To a collector, these things must be worth a fortune.

As Zach and Duncan continue moving through-

DUNCANI can’t believe you’ve never read a Goosebumps book before. Man, you have no idea what you’re missing.(off “Revenge of Garden Gnomes”) Homicidal garden gnomes...(off “Hororland”)One-legged zombie pirates...(off “Beasts From the East”)Unstoppable eating machines...

Duncan notices a manuscript on the shelf that grabs his eye.

DUNCANWhoa. “The Abominable Snow Man of Pasadena”. I used to read this all the time back in middle school. Gave me nightmares every time it snowed.

As Duncan studies the “Abominable Snowman” book, Zach spies some PAPERS on an end table. Zach’s name is on all of them.

ZACHHey, this is my high school transcript....and my dental records...and my third grade book report on the circulatory system...

DUNCANWow. Looks like Shivers has been keeping as much of an eye on you as you have on him.

Zach’s face tightens. As Duncan fiddles with the lock on the book, Zach wanders off, moving down a SEPARATE AISLE when-

Zach spies something else. A DISPLAY CASE at the end of the aisle. Zach approaches the case to see--AN ANTIQUE DUMMY.

The same dummy we saw in the opening. Creepy personified. As Zach examines the wooden dummy curiously-

He notices that a series of STRANGE WORDS have been carved into the dummy’s wooden forearm like a tattoo.

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Curiosity piqued, Zach cranes his neck around the case for a better view, then quietly reads the words aloud.

ZACH(reading)

Karru marri odonna loma molnukarrana.(beat)...Must be made in China.

BY DUNCAN; OPPOSITE AISLE

Duncan pulls and tugs on the book to get it open. No luck. The book is locked tight. It’s then that Duncan notices a SHINY GOLD KEY, hanging on a hook by the desk...

BY ZACH

As Zach continues to study the dummy-

A FIGURE appears behind him. Slowly moving though the shadows and towards Zach. Moving closer...closer...and then-

FIGURE(o.s.)

What are you doing in here??

Heart in throat, Zach spins around to reveal-

ZACHHannah!

Indeed, there stands Hannah, safe and sound.

ZACH...you’re alright.

HANNAHOf course, I’m alright. (grabbing Zach)Now you have to get out of here before my uncle finds you.

ZACH(pulls away)

Whoa. No way. I’m not going anywhere without you.

HANNAHWithout me? Zach, what are you talking about?

ZACHI’m talking about last night.Hannah, I heard you scream. Or are you going to tell me that was the TV too?

HANNAHZach, you have to leave. My uncle will be back any minute.

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ZACHI don’t understand. Why would you want to protect someone who was trying to hurt you?

HANNAHHurt me? Is that what you think? My uncle wasn’t trying to hurt me. He was trying to save me.

ZACHSave you from what?

With that, Duncan appears around the bend with the opened “Abominable Snowman of Pasadena” book in hand-

DUNCANHey, check it out. The key was just hanging on the wall.

Upon seeing the unfastened book, Hannah’s eyes widen in livid horror-

HANNAHNo! Don’t open that!!

But it’s too late. With a blast of hurricane wind, Zach and the others are hurled backwards as a NEW FIGURE abruptly appears in the room as if out of thin air.

As Zach and the others regain their composure, a shadow grows over the scene...growing taller...taller...

Realizing they’re no longer alone, Zach and the others slowly look up to see-

Yup, you guess it--THE ABOMINABLE SNOWMAN OF PASADENA

Tangled hair. Crowded fangs. Fifteen feet tall. Three thousand pounds. Very real...and very pissed off.

Zach and Duncan stand frozen, unable to comprehend the monstrous mammoth that stands before them.

DUNCANPlease tell me I’m not the only one seeing this.

With that, The Abominable Snowman roars. The room trembles. Walls shake. The display case that holds the ventriloquist’s dummy crashes to the ground. Duncan drops the book and key when-

INT. - LIVING ROOM

The three terrified teens charge out of the study and into the living room when-

Boom! The study doors (and adjoining wall) explode as the rampaging monsters storms into the living room.

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The marauding monster crashes through the living room, turning the staircase into splinters and the furniture into dust.

The three frantic teens scatter blindly as the Abominable Snowman charges in Duncan’s direction-

Having coming to a dead end before the barred-bay window, the screaming Duncan turns to see the roaring snow monster bearing down on him like a man-eating freight train when-

Zach knocks Duncan to the ground as the Abominable Snowman of Pasadena blast through the bay window and into the night. Steel snaps. Glass shatters. The burglar alarm wails.

Once the dust settles, a flabbergasted Zach and Duncan rise to see the twisted bars and broken glass where the bay window used to be. The Abominable Snowman is nowhere to be seen...having fled into the night. A shell-shocked beat, then-

DUNCAN(in disbelief)

That was the Abominable Snowman of Pasadena.

A concerned Hannah appears on the scene, quickly silencing the burglar alarm.

HANNAHAbby.

Zach turns towards her. Huh?

HANNAHHer name is Abby.

With that, Hannah quickly rushes off into the study.

DUNCAN(still in disbelief)

That was the Abominable Snow-Woman of Pasadena.

Regaining his composure, Zach follows after Hannah.

INT. - STUDY

In shambles. Hannah frantically rustles through an end table, grabbing a flashlight.

HANNAHMy uncle’s going to kill me.

A flustered Zach rushes onto the scene as Hannah starts out.

ZACHHannah, wait! Where are you going?

HANNAHWhere does it look like I’m going?I’m going after her.

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Hannah rushes off, leaving a stupefied Zach behind.

ZACHWhat!??

Zach quickly follows.

EXT. - HOUSE; LAWN

Hannah moves briskly across the lawn, hurriedly following Abby’s trail of destruction....through the gate...across Zach’s front lawn...and into the night.

HANNAH(calling out)

Abby!

Head spinning, Zach rushes towards Hannah’s side.

ZACHWhoa, Hannah. Wait up!

HANNAHGo home, Zach.

ZACHGo home?? I’m not going anywhere until you tell me what just happened back there!(blocking Hannah’s path)Hannah, please. I can’t help you if you won’t talk to me.

HANNAH(cutting)

Help me?? Haven’t you helped enough?

Ouch. Zach reels. Regretful, Hannah softens.

HANNAHOkay, look, if you really want to help me, then help me find her. After that,...I’ll tell you anything you want to know.

With that, Hannah disappears past the crumpled front gate and out into the street. Duncan rushes to Zach’s side.

DUNCAN(off Hannah)

Where’s she going??

ZACHTo find her friend...

A determined Zach musters up every ounce of courage he has.

ZACH...and we’re going to help her.

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DUNCANWhat?! Are you crazy?? That thing gave me enough nightmares when I thought it wasn’t real.

ZACHLook, it’s our fault that “thing” got loose in the first place.

DUNCANOur fault?? I wanted to stay home and watch “The Great Pumpkin”!

ZACHOkay, fine. My fault. Either way, I can’t just stand here and do nothing.

As Zach moves forward, Duncan grabs him.

DUNCANDude, I know you like this girl, but is she worth getting yourself killed over? (beat)C’mon, man...you can still walk away.

Zach considers this.

ZACHNo. I can’t.

With that, Zach races off after Hannah.

DUNCANZach!

Duncan stands alone in the darkness. He eyes the dim, deserted scene uneasily, then-

DUNCAN...I’m really starting to hate Halloween. (beat)Zach, wait up!

Duncan nervously races after Zach.

EXT. - STREETS - A LITTLE LATER

Car alarms blare. Perplexed NEIGHBORS stand outside their porch. Abby’s trail of destruction leads right through the neighborhood. Smashed fences, crumpled mailboxes...

HANNAH(calling out)

Abby! Here, girl. Abby!

Rushing down the end of the block, Hannah stops. Sees nothing. Sighs. Zach and Duncan rush up beside her.

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HANNAHIt’s no use. By now she could be anywhere.

Crash! Glass is heard breaking. Just beyond the woods nearby. Hannah runs towards the sound. Zach and Duncan follow bringing us to-

EXT. - ICE SKATING RINK

The front window is shattered. Hannah and Zach eye each other knowingly, then rush forward. After all, what better place for a snow monster to hide than the coolest place in town? Duncan stays behind when-

Zach rushes back to get him.

DUNCANI was just tying my shoe...

With that, the three head inside.

EXT. - ICE SKATING RINK

Dark. Deserted. The front window is shattered. Broken glass covers the cement floor. The silent alarm’s been triggered. They don’t have much time.

Hannah scans the dim scene, turning on her flashlight. The flashlight’s beam cuts through darkness revealing a few overturned ARCADE GAMES...some SHATTERED BENCHES...but no Abby.

Zach and the others talk in measured whispers as they move onto the ICE SKATING RINK.

ZACHMaybe we should split up.

DUNCANSplit up?? What, are you nuts? Don’t you know what happens to people who “split up”?

ZACHHey. Over there.

Zach notices something lying in the center of the ice skating rink and moves out to investigate.

DUNCAN Zach, where are you going? Zach.

But Zach’s already gone.

Eyes alert, Zach moves slowly and cautiously towards the center of the rink. Once there, he bends down to discover a pile of SCATTERED CANDY. As Zach regards the candy curiously-

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Several more Skittles rain down from above...followed by some Snickers bars and about two dozen rolls of Lifesavers. As Zach slowly looks up his heart stops upon seeing-

ABBY--hanging in the darkness of steel rafters above. In her mighty arms is a VENDING MACHINE that’s been torn open like a Cracker Jack box.

Zach stands frozen as Abby tears through the vending machine, stopping upon seeing DOZENS OF PEZ DISPENSERS inside.

ABBY(hungrily)

Pezzzzz....

With that, Abby grabs the Pez dispensers and devours them whole. Plastic and candy are reduced to dust in Abby’s jaws.

Duncan watches in terror.

DUNCAN(whispers to Hannah)

Abominable snow monsters like Pez?

HANNAHJolly Ranchers kept getting stuck in her fur...

Once done devouring the Pez, Abby tosses the vending machine aside. Slam! The vending machine crashes down onto the rink below...missing Zach by mere inches. Duncan yelps.

Upon hearing the noise, Abby notices Zach. Her eyes tighten angrily. Zach is about to run for his life when-

SHIVERS(o.s.)

Stop!

Zach turns to see Mr. Shivers--now standing beside Duncan and Hannah, Abby’s book in hand. Looking every bit as scared as Zach, Shivers’s tense eyes are fixed on the abominable abomination who hangs above.

SHIVERS(to Zach; off Abby)

Don’t make any sudden movements.

Gaze trained on Zach, Abby growls. Low and intense.

SHIVERSOkay, now just...back away. Slowly.

Zach obeys, slowly and carefully moving backwards off the ice. Abby watches Zach’s every move, perched in the rafter like a coiled spring waiting to strike.

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SHIVERS(to Zach)

That’s right. You’re doing fine.Just relax. Stay calm. And whatever you do--

Duncan steps back against the hockey net...triggering the GOAL SIREN.

SHIVERS(crap)

--don’t make any loud noises.

Suddenly feeling threatened, Abby roars with the intensity of, well,...a two ton snow monster.

ZACH(to Shivers)

Now what?!

SHIVERS(to Zach; losing it)

Run!!!!!!

Slipping and sliding, a terrified Zach races across the ice and towards the nearby cafeteria as the enraged Abby crashes down onto the rink, splintering the ice like a frozen jigsaw puzzle.

Zach bolts as Abby pursues, racing through the CAFETERIA and into the LOCKER AREA. A maze of steel lockers stretch out in every direction. Zach turns left...right...left until he find himself staring at a DEAD END. Slam! Zach turns as-

Unable to fit between the narrow row, Abby buries her massive frame against the lockers, widening the row a blow at a time.

Slam! Abby’s reach grows closer. Slam! Closer. Slam! Closer. With nowhere left to run, Zach closes his eyes and braces for the worst when-

HANNAH(o.s.)

Hey, Abby!

Zach opens his eyes. Abby turns to see Hannah standing behind her, waving a handful of Pez dispensers.

HANNAHYou want some Pez? C’mon, girl. Come and get it.

With that, Hannah runs away. Taking the bait, Abby follows. Breathless, Zach stands in silence when-

HANNAH(o.s.)

Are you okay?

Zach jumps and turns to see Hannah standing behind him in the dead end. Zach stares stunned.

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ZACHHey, how did you do that?

But before Hannah can respond, Duncan’s horrified screams fill the scene.

ZACHDuncan...

ICE RINK

As the furious Abby thunders across the ice in hot pursuit of the frantically fleeing Duncan-

DUNCANOh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God!

Shivers frantically rushes to Duncan’s aid, stopping to open the book that Abby escaped from when-

SHIVERSAbby, stop!

Wham! Abby swats Shivers aside, sending both Shivers and the book tumbling to the ground. The book sails across the ice like a hockey pock, slowing to a stop on the northern side of the rink. At the same time-

As Duncan dives under a ZAMBONI to take refuge from the pursuing Abby-

Zach and Hannah come into view as Shivers’s book comes to a sliding stop before them.

On the other side of the rink, Abby tosses the zamboni aside like a Tonka Toy revealing the cowering Duncan hiding underneath.

With only seconds before Duncan is pulverized, Zach spies a pile of HOCKEY STICKS when-

A dazed Shivers painfully rises as-

ZACH(o.s.; to Shivers)

Heads up!

Shivers turns as Zach swats the book with a hockey stick-- sending it soaring back across the ice rink and into Shiver’s waiting arms. At the same time-

With a triumphant roar, Abby bears down on Duncan to deliver the killing blow when-

SHIVERSAbby!

And, with that, Shivers opens the book.

Like a portable black hole, A VACUUM OF HURRICANE-FORCE WIND IS INSTANTLY RELEASED WITHIN THE SKATING RINK violently drawing Abby back onto the pages of her own story.

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As a trembling Shivers struggles to hold onto the opened book, the snarling Abby desperately buries her claws into the ice, furiously fighting against the vacuum’s increasing pressure.

Rushing to the scene, Zach and Duncan stare thunderstruck as Abby’s fur transforms into ink...then into letters...and, finally, back into words. Soon, only Abby’s slashing paw remains as the last of the Abominable Snow-Woman of Pasadena disappears back into the literary prison from where she came.

Going...going...gone.

A panting Shivers slams the book closed. It locks instantly. Silence resumes. Then-

SHIVERSHannah, get in the car.

HANNAHBut-

SHIVERSHannah. Car.

With that, Shivers quickly ushers Hannah out leaving a dumbfounded Zach and Duncan behind. A thunderstruck beat, then-

DUNCANThis is exactly why kid’s hate reading.

Zach rushes after Shivers and Hannah. Duncan follows.

DUNCANSeriously, you never see this kind of thing happening with DVDs!

EXT. - SKATING RINK; PARKING LOT

Shivers leads Hannah into the car.

HANNAHIt wasn’t their fault. They were only trying to help.

SHIVERSWe’ll talk about this at home.

Zach and Duncan rush towards Shivers’s waiting car as Shivers moves in.

ZACHMr. Shivers...(no response)Mr. Shivers...

And then-

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ZACHMr. Stine.

Upon hearing the name “Stine”, Shivers stops and turns. Zach has clearly figured it out--Mr. Shivers is, in fact, thee R.L. STINE. As Duncan begins to understand as well-

DUNCANWait. Are you saying that Mr. Shivers is really...

Star-struck, Duncan extends his hand toward Stine.

DUNCANMr. Stine. Big fan.

Needless to say, Stine does not shake. A tense stand-off ensues, until-

STINE(opens wallet)

Okay, Shag and Scooby, so what’s it going to take? A couple of dirt bikes? A new Xbox? Seriously, just name your price. I’m sure it’s nothing I haven’t heard before.

ZACHI don’t want your money. I want to know what’s going on.

STINEI stand corrected. (puts his wallet away)You should’ve taken the Xbox.

With that, Stine, once again, starts off when-

ZACHWait!

Suddenly, distant sirens are heard. Getting closer.

ZACHLook, either you talk to me... or I talk to them.

Zach’s not playing around. Stine knows it. Zach knows it too. Then, as the tension builds to a fever pitch-

STINEFine. Get in the car.

With that, the two teens hop in the car with Hannah.

EXT. - STREET - MOMENTS LATER

Stine’s car moves in one direction as two police cars head in the other. Abby’s trail of destruction paints the scene.

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STINE(o.s.)

Unbelievable.

INT. - STINE’S CAR

Stine frantically squeezes his stress ball, clearly unhinged--a stark contrast to the “cool customer” we met earlier.

STINETen years of meditation classes and relaxation therapy down the drain!

A frazzled Stine turns toward Zach and Duncan, inadvertently swerving into oncoming traffic.

STINEDo you have any idea how much money I’ve blown on scented candles and chamomile tea this year alone??

Horns beep. Hannah quickly grabs the wheel and steers back into their lane. The flustered Stine continues driving, freaking, and fuming.

DUNCAN(to Zach; whispers)

...This is the guy who’s so cool he sweats snowflakes?

STINEYou are in big trouble, young lady.(to Zach and Duncan)And you two...I don’t even know where to begin!

ZACHHey, I know. How about at the part where a two ton snow monster jumped out of your book and into my mom’s vegetable garden!

Stine and Hannah exchange uneasy glances. The cat is most definitely out of the bag.

ZACHLook, as much as you think we’re not ready to hear whatever it is you have to tell us, trust me, it can’t be anything worse than what we’ve already seen.

Zach has Stine there. Hannah offers Stine an encouraging nod. Stine considers this. A reluctant beat. A hesitant sigh. Then-

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STINEWhen I was a kid I made a wish that one day I’d be able to write stories so scary that my monsters would literally just jump right off the page. Well, one day...theyliterally just did.(shrugs)What can I say? Every writer has their demons. Mine just happen to be copy-righted.

As Zach’s head spins-

ZACHAre you trying to tell us that every monster you’ve ever written...is real?

STINEActually, I prefer to think of them more as “literary manifestations”.

DUNCAN(freaking out)

How is this even possible??!

STINELook, I don’t know how! All I know is that for the last twenty years every ghost, ghoul, and goblin that I’ve ever put into a Goosebumps story somehow always manages to find their way out.

ZACHAnd is that what I heard last night? Another one of your “literary manifestations”?

HANNAH(shrugs)

The Werewolf of Fever Swamp tends to get a little stir crazy during a full moon.

DUNCANCould you pull over? I think I’m going to be sick.

ZACH(to Stine)

Wait a minute. If this happened to you every time you sat down to write a Goosebumps story, then why didn’t you just stop writing??

STINEDon’t you think I tried? Unfortunately, there were other factors to consider. The fans. The publishers.

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ZACH(accusingly)

The money?

STINE(defensively)

Hey, do you have any idea what it’s like to try to earn a living as a writer these days? Besides, once I figured out that I could use the original manuscripts to trap any creature I created, I thought I had everything under control.

A painful beat, then-

STINEIt wasn’t until East Hanover, New Jersey that I realized just how wrong I was.

DUNCANWhy? What happened in East Hanover, New Jersey?

STINEYou remember the northeast black out 2003?

ZACHHow could I forget? My dad and I were stuck in a subway car half the night. I thought that was caused by some computer glitch.

STINEFortunately, so did everybody else.I guess “Giant Tarantula Caught Chewing On Power Lines” doesn’t look as good on an insurance report.

Stine sighs longingly, reflecting on the reason for his retirement.

STINEAfter that, I vowed to never write another word again. I changed my name, went into hiding, and haven’t written so much as a thank you note since.

ZACH(to Stine)

I don’t understand. If these “manifestations” of yours are so dangerous, then why do you even keep them around in the first place?

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STINEWhat else am I supposed to do? It’s not their fault that they’re mindless killing machines.(like a responsible parent)After all,..I made them what they are.

As Zach takes this in this Frankenstein-like bond-

DUNCANLook out!!

Stine turns to see SOMETHING IN THE ROAD. Something big. Stine swerves. All four scream.

EXT. - ROAD

Rubber screeches as brakes lock.

INT. - CAR

As the car comes to a violent halt-

STINEIs everybody okay?

ZACHI think so. What the hell was that thing?

But before anyone can answer--Wham! A giant INSECT-LIKE LEG slams down in front of the car. Three more follow.

EXT. - CAR

Stine and the others exit to see--a pack of GIANT PRAYING MANTISES slowly moving across the road and into the forest. Thirty feet tall. Fifty feet long. The four stare in stunned silence, when-

ZACH...I’m going to guess the giant praying mantises aren’t indigenous to Maryland.

Upon realizing that more of his monsters are on the loose, Stine turns his accusing gaze to Hannah.

STINEHannah-

HANNAHIt wasn’t us. Honest! Every book was closed and locked before we left the house. I made sure.

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STINEWell, if it wasn’t you then-(horrified realization)Get in the car. Everybody get in the car.

The others follow orders. With that, Stine pounds the gas as rubber burns.

INT. - CAR

Duncan quickly puts on his seat belt as Stine’s car races down the suburban streets, taking every turn at break-neck speed. Stine looks more panicked than usual.

STINE(to Zach and Duncan)

Okay, now, I want you two to listen to me very carefully. “Karru marriodonna loma molnu karrana”. When you were in my study, did either one of you two say those words out loud?

An uncertain beat, then-

ZACH...would that have been bad?

Stine and Hannah’s silence speaks volumes.

EXT. - STINE’S HOUSE; DRIVEWAY

Brakes scream. Tripping over his own feet, a frantic Stine rushes out of the car and towards the house. The others follow.

ZACHWait! Will someone please tell us what’s going on??

But Stine’s already moving. The other follow.

INT. - STINE’S STUDY

Stine and the others stop dead in their tracks.

BLANK PAGES flutter around like snowflakes as we reveal that every single Goosebumps book in Stine’s library has been unlocked and opened. “Revenge of the Garden Gnomes”, “Beasts From the East”, “One Day at Horrorland“,...Yup, all of ‘em. Every single one of Stine’s monsters has been set loose.

ZACHWhat kind of person would do something like this?

STINENot a person...

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A SHATTERED DISPLAY case can be seen lying nearby. Empty.

STINE...A dummy.

With that, we PULL BACK to reveal that the entire western wall of the study is gone. Only dust and rubble remain.

HUNDREDS OF SETS of MONSTROUS-LOOKING TRACKS disappear off into the night.

Stine looks down to see that he’s squeezed his stress ball so hard it ruptured. Sand pours out onto the floor.

Meanwhile...

EXT. - LORRAINE’S HOUSE - THAT MOMENT

Decorated with dozens of harmless, porcelain LAWN GNOMES--all wearing BLUE-POINTY HATS.

INT. - LORRAINE’S HOUSE

Stenciled walls. Painted ceramics. Home-made frames. Lorraine’s two cats lie lazily on top of their cat CLIMBING POST as Lorraine finishes bedazzling Melissa’s angel costume, transforming an elegant cherub into a tacky butterfly.

LORRAINEThere...now isn’t that so much better?

A beaming Melissa applauds wildly. The phone rings. Lorraine answers.

LORRAINEHello?

INTERCUT - HIGH SCHOOL; HALLWAY OUTSIDE GYM

Music plays. COSTUMED TEENS dance to latest pop tunes as Gale talks on a pay phone outside the gym. Principal Chapman and the other TEACHERS are there--also dressed for the occasion.

GALEHey. How’s the munchkin?

LORRAINE(off Melissa’s costume)

A perfect angel. Literally.

GALEThanks again for looking after her. Lately, I just can’t seem to rely on Zach for anything.

LORRAINEHappy to help. So how’s the dance going?

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Gale glances up to see Coach Garrison dancing seductively for Gale’s pleasure. Gale offers the coach a weak smile.

GALELet’s just say that it’s not the students that need adult supervision. Anyway,...do you think you can manage another couple of hours without me?

LORRAINE(off Melissa)

Oh, I think we’ll survive.

As Gale notices two groping teens-

GALEHey. Hands where I can seem them.

INT. - LORRAINE’S HOUSE

Chuckling, Lorraine hangs up and gets back to “enhancing” Melissa’s costume.

LORRAINESo,...who’s ready for some Glitter Glue??

As Melissa cheers excitedly-

Crash! Noise from outside. Sounds like plates being shattered. Alarmed, Lorraine quickly rises and opens the front door to see--

Nothing. Outside, all is still and silent. The lawn gnomes stand guard in their usual adorable positions.

Seeing that her lawn gnomes are still in one piece, Lorraine closes the front door. As she does we notice that blue-hatted lawn gnomes have been replaced by RED-HATTED LAWN GNOMES, each porcelain face more sinister-looking than the last.

The SHATTERED REMAINS of the BLUE-HATTED LAWN GNOMES litter the yard.

INT. - LORRAINE’S HOUSE

As Lorraine closes the door-

Outside, a chorus of mischievous LAUGHTER is heard. Again, Lorraine opens the door. Only this time--

The red-hatted lawn gnomes are gone. Lorraine stares thunderstruck at the deserted front lawn.

LORRAINE...What the helicopter is going on around here?

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Suddenly, commotion is heard coming from the backyard. Lorraine quickly hurries inside and onto the-

EXT. - BACK PORCH

Rushing onto the porch, Lorraine turns on the light to reveal-

LORRAINE(thunderstruck)

...holy shrimp.

The backyard is filled with dozens of rampaging, red-hatted lawn gnomes....all as animated and destructive as a horde of porcelain gremlins.

Flowers are torn up by the roots. Pumpkins are shattered with croquet hammers. The bird bath is used as a urinal. As the menacing lawn gnomes all turn their blazing red eyes toward Lorraine, Lorraine screams in horror, bringing us to-

INT. - POLICE STATION

Mayhem. The phone’s been ringing off the hook.

OFFICER #1(into phone)

Yes, ma’am. I heard you. There’s an army of homicidal lawn gnomes invading your petunia garden. We’ll have someone look right into that.

The OFFICER #1 rolls her eyes at OFFICER #2.

OFFICER #2(into phone)

Now, let me get this straight, sir. The playground is filled with mommies. I don’t see how that’s a-(deadpan)Oh. “Mummies”. Yes, now I could see how that might be a problem...

OFFICER #1(into phone)

I understand, ma'am. There’s some kind of sea serpent in your jacuzzi. (beat)We’ll send someone right over.

Officer Stevens eyes Officer Brooks helplessly.

OFFICER BROOKSLooks like the Sheriff picked the right week to go fly fishing.

Steven chuckles, amused. Then-

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Outside, commotion is heard. Stevens and Brooks peer out the window to see a group of ZOMBIES shambling along on the left side of the street. A couple of WEREWOLVES trample through on the right.

OFFICER STEVENSHey, is it me or are there a lot more trick-or-treaters out this year than last?

The phones continue to ring relentlessly as the officers begin to realize that things might be more serious than they first appeared. Meanwhile...

EXT. - RANDOM STREET; ACROSS TOWN

Cars lie trashed. Street signs, crumpled. The sounds of distant mayhem are heard as Stine, Zach, Duncan, and Hannah frantically race down the abandoned scene and towards Main Street.

ZACH(to Stine)

Slappy?! Are you telling me that the wooden dummy in the display case was another of your monsters??

DUNCANNot just any monster, but the most dangerous, demented monster that R.L. Stine ever put down on paper.

STINEIf only he stayed there...

DUNCANDude, Slappy’s like the King Kong of Goosebumps monsters...only, you know, a whole lot smaller.

ZACH(to Stine)

If he was so dangerous then why didn't you keep him locked up in a book like all the rest?

STINEDon't you think I tried? Unfortunately, every time I locked Slappy in, he'd always find a new way to get out. (accusingly)Why do you think I put him somewhere where I could always keep an eye on him?

ZACH(defensively)

Well, how was I supposed to know that reading those six stupid words would bring him to life??

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STINE(to Zach)

What, haven’t you ever read a Goosebumps book before?

ZACHSorry. I was always more of a Harry Potter fan.

STINE(unimpressed)

Why am I not surprised?

Suddenly, screams and commotion are heard coming from ahead. Everyone pauses.

DUNCAN(hopefully)

Maybe it's not as bad as we think.

With that, the four turn the bend, bringing us to

MAIN STREET

Stine is the first to stop. The others come to thunderstruck halt behind him as we reveal-

STINEYou’re right...It's worse.

Mayhem. Chaos. Panic. Main Street is literally overrun with every type of monster that's ever came out of Stine's inkwell. HORRIFIED CITIZENS run, hide, and lock themselves indoors as the riotous monsters tear up the town. TERRIFIED POLICE OFFICERS can be seen taking refuge in their own cells.

Everywhere you look it's the same. A full-on Monster-palooza! As Stine, Zach, and Hannah stare in horror-

DUNCAN(star-struck)

Hey, that's the Werewolf of Fever Swamp...and Murder the Clown... and the Knight in Screaming Armor.

ZACH(annoyed)

Maybe you'd like to ask for their autographs?!

DUNCAN(sheepishly)

Sorry. Normal doesn't get many celebrities.

As panic continues to spread like wildfire-

ZACHWe have to call the police.

DUNCANWe have to call the marines.

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Wham! A TELEPHONE POLE crashes onto the street, uprooted like a tree by one of the rampaging ghouls. Sparks fly as smoke pours.

HANNAH(off the tower)

...I don't think we're going to be calling anybody.

Hiding behind a PARKED CAR, Zach and the others watch helplessly as the chaotic scene builds to a fever pitch when-

Gong! Gong! Heads turn as the sound of blaring CHURCH BELLS ring. All eyes turn to see the HOODED EXECUTIONER from "A Night in Terror Tower" standing in the church's bell tower and slamming the dull side of his ax into the bell--demanding the monsters' attention.

Silence grows as a NEW FIGURE emerges onto the scene, his ENORMOUS SHADOW is cast across the town square.

FIGURE (o.s.; to the monsters)

Unbelievable. Five minutes of freedom and you’re already running around like you own the place.

The figure moves up the staircase and into the GAZEBO that overlooks the village green. The figure's shadow grows smaller...smaller...until we reveal-

SLAPPYAnd they call me the dummy.

Meet SLAPPY. All two foot eight inches of him. The brains to the monsters brawn. If Truman Capote was carved out of wood.

Upon seeing Slappy, the monsters snarl. They might be dumb, but they don't like being called out on it. A fierce eight-foot ALIEN from “Invasion of the Body Squeezers” moves into the gazebo and looms over Slappy.

ALIEN BODY SQUEEZERWho you calling “dummy”,...dummy?

SLAPPYNo offense intended.(extends his hand)Shake?

An uncertain beat, then-

The instant the alien shakes Slappy’s hand a BLAST OF ELECTRICITY is sent soaring through the alien’s body reducing him to a charred pile of smoldering flesh.

The alien’s smoking body drops to the ground as Slappy reveals the “gag” HAND BUZZER he wears. Needless to say, the monsters are impressed. Slappy has proven that size really doesn’t matter.

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SLAPPYNow, as I was saying...(to all monsters)Sure, we may be running wild and free for now, but how long do you think that'll last? We all know how this story ends because it always ends the same way--Humans win. Monsters lose. Heck, it's the story of our lives.

Monsters murmur. A hard point to argue.

SLAPPYFace it--alone, we’re not worth the paper we're printed on. But, together...(grins fiendishly)Together we just might be able to give humanity something to really be afraid of.

EXT. - BEHIND PARKED CAR

ZACH(to Stine)

What's Slappy talking about?

But a dumbfounded Stine has no idea.

EXT. - GAZEBO

SLAPPYTonight, my friends, is only the beginning. With my brains and your spawns, we can rule this world and put an end to mankind once and for all.

Monster roar in agreement. Stine watches on in horror as Slappy turns an angry mob into an organized army.

EXT. - BEHIND CAR

STINESlappy doesn't just want a revolt. He wants a war!

ZACH(to Stine)

We have to get your monsters back in their books where they belong.

HANNAHUhm, guys,...I think that might be easier said than done.

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An ARMY OF ZOMBIES from "Graveyard Ghouls" appears, all pushing shopping carts full of Stine's ORIGINAL GOOSEBUMPS MANUSCRIPTS--all just gathered from Stine's study.

The books are dumped in a pile in the town square. The monsters gather around. Slappy moves before them all.

SLAPPY(to all monsters)

Everybody loves a twist ending. And, tonight, we're going to give mankind a twist they're never gonna see coming....because tonight-

Slappy rubs his wooden fingers together until they start to smoke. A hellish fire slowly rises from his fingertips.

SLAPPY...it's the monsters turn to win.

And, with that, Slappy ignites the pile of manuscripts. Whoosh! Pages erupt into flames.

Monsters howl in glee as their literary prisons go up in ashes. Zach, Stine, and the others stare in hopeless horror.

Slappy blows out his burning fingers like birthday candles as he turns toward his newly-formed army of monsters.

SLAPPY(to all monsters)

Seal off the town, round up the humans, and, most importantly, ...bring me Stine!

Organized and unified, the monsters cheer.

EXT. - BEHIND CAR

Stine and the others watch in horror.

DUNCANI wonder if Stephen King ever had to deal with anything like this...

An ashen-faced Stine turns to Duncan.

EXT. - GAZEBO - MOMENTS LATER

Slappy is there, surrounded by a REPRESENTATIVE OF EACH MONSTER group. The gazebo’s the war room and Slappy’s the general. A map of the town is laid out before them, divided into sections. A battle plan.

SLAPPYI want this town sealed off, block by block, until we find Stine.

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INTERCUT - MAIN STREET

As the monsters branch out from Main Street, Normal is slowly overtaken as STRAY HUMANS are gathered up by MONSTER POLICE--a hideous group of reptilian-like monsters that come straight out of Stine’s “Horrorland” series. CLEM is their leader.

EXT. - GAZEBO

SLAPPYI want eyes in the sky.

INTERCUT - VAMPIRE BATS

VAMPIRE BATS soar over Normal like winged drones.

EXT. - GAZEBO

SLAPPYNoses to the ground.

INTERCUT - WEREWOLVES

Clem holds up Stine’s BROKEN STRESS BALL in front of a pack of werewolves. The werewolves sniff the ball, picking up on Stine’s scent.

EXT. - GAZEBO

SLAPPYThis is our town now...

INTERCUT - BRIDGE

A MAN-EATING PLANT wraps its massive tendrils around the Main Street trestle bridge and pulls---sending the shattered wooden bridge into the ravine below.

EXT. - GAZEBO

SLAPPY...and, this time, I’m the one pulling the strings.

EXT. - MAIN STREET - MOMENTS LATER

As terrified CITIZENS are imprisoned in a row of shops that now act as cells-

NEARBY ALLEY

Stine, Zach, Duncan, and Hannah peer out from the shadows to take in the escalating mayhem. As Stine eyes all the rampaging monsters like a scorned father-

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STINEFor twenty years I slaved in front of that typewriter, day after day...night after night...livingoff cold coffee and stale doughnuts...and this is the thanks I get? (steaming)Those ungrateful little...(searches for the word)...monsters!

Desperately looking for a replacement stress ball, Stine grabs a ROTTED ORANGE out of nearby trash can. He squeezes and squeezes. Juice squirts and squirts.

ZACH(face full of juice)

Will you cut that out!

Zach grabs the orange away from Stine as the hysterical Stine turns toward Zach.

STINEYou! You did this! I knew you were trouble the second you moved in.

ZACHOh, so is that why you’ve been spying on me?

STINE(defensively)

I like to know the kind of people I’m living next to.

ZACHWell, at least your living next to people!

HANNAHGuys, this isn’t helping.

Clamming up, Stine and Zach eye each other coldly.

ZACHOkay, let’s just calm down, put our heads together, and figure out some sort of a plan.

STINEA plan?? What plan? There’s no plan for a situation like this!

DUNCANWhat do you mean, there’s no plan?

ZACH(to Stine)

There has to be something you can do. These are your monsters. You created them.

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STINEJust because I created them doesn’t mean I can control them. Besides, whatever power I might’ve had went up in smoke the same time my manuscripts did.

DUNCANThen you can use mine. I have every Goosebumps book ever written.

STINEI already told you--they have to be the original manuscripts. The same ink and paper that created them is the only ink and paper that can hold them.

ZACH(to Stine)

If you wrote those things off the page then there has to be a way to write them back on it.

STINELook, writing something off the page is one thing, but writing something them back on...(beat)It just can’t be done.

HANNAH(light bulb)

Slappy seems to think it can. (to Stine)Why else would he want to find you so bad unless he thought you were the only one who could stop him?

Hannah’s got a good point. Still, the prospect of writing scares Stine more than any of his monsters do.

STINE(to Zach)

Even if that was true--even if I could somehow do what you’re asking--do you have any idea how many stories I'd have write to recapture every monster I ever created?

ZACHJust one.

HANNAH(realizing)

One story to capture every monster.

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DUNCANHey, yeah. I mean, they do it in comic books all the time. “The Legion of Doom”...”The Sinister Six”...Kinda like a super villain mash-up.

STINEWell, in case you haven’t noticed, this isn’t a comic book and those aren’t super villains. Besides, it’s like I told you before--I’m retired.

With that, Stine begins to walk away when-

ZACHYou’re not retired. You’re afraid.

Zach moves before Stine.

ZACHYou heard Slappy. Normal’s only the beginning. If we don’t do something now,...we might not get another chance.

As Zach lets the settle in-

ZACHLook, I know sometimes it’s easier to run away from your problems than face them,...but haven’t you ran enough?

And there it is. Stine stands conflicted. Then-

STINEI’m sorry,...but I can’t help you.

Shattered, Hannah’s face sinks. A reluctant beat, then-

STINE...at least not without something to write with.

Hannah brightens. As hope spreads-

ZACHYou can use my laptop.

STINENo. It has to be my Smith Corona. (explains)My Smith Corona typewriter. I wrote all my Goosebumps stories on it. If this is going to work, we can’t leave anything to chance.

ZACHOkay, then we’ll just have to go back to your place and get it.

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STINEDon’t bother. It’s not there. After all the trouble that typewriter and I caused, I couldn’t stand to be in the same room with it anymore,...soI donated it. To the high school.

DUNCANThe high school? But that’s all the way on the other side of town. (to Zach)Dude, we’re not going to last twenty feet out there, nevermindtwenty blocks.

STINEHe’s right. By now, Slappy has every monster in my series out looking for me.

HANNAHHey, guys...

The others follow Hannah’s gaze to the shattered windows of the town PARTY SUPPLY STORE--stocked to the brim with Halloween costumes. RUBBER MASKS. PLASTIC FANGS. You name it.

HANNAH...I think I have a really bad idea.

EXT. - MAIN STREET; TOWN SQUARE - A LITTLE LATER

Filled with monsters of every shape and size. Nearby, regular- looking people walk into the moonlight and immediately become transparent--revealing themselves to be GHOSTS.

Dressed in hastily-assembled MONSTER DISGUISES, Stine and the others slowly shuffle onto the scene, doing their best to hide in plain sight among the throngs of Stine’s own ghoulish creations. Terrified, Duncan freezes. Zach notices.

ZACHDuncan, what’s wrong? Why are you stopping?

DUNCANIt’s like all my nightmares are having a block party. I can’t do this, Zach. I’m not like you. I don’t know how to be tough.

ZACHI’m not tough, Duncan. I’m terrified. But sometimes you just have to fake it. Now, c’mon.

As Zach shoves Duncan along, Stine discreetly snags a CHARRED MANUSCRIPT COVER from the pile of burned books and stuffs it in his satchel for later use.

66.

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ALL

As the four “faux fiends” nervously shuffle through the scene, Stine offers some relaxation tips from his years of therapy, attempting to calm the teens as well as himself.

STINE(from under his mask)

That’s right. Just relax. Stay calm. Try some meditation exercises. Picture yourself on a warm beach...a snowy mountain... a lush forest drenched with morning dew...

ZACH(from under his mask)

Have you gone mental?

Continuing across Main Street, Duncan glances back to see that the monsters are now all behind them.

DUNCANOh, my God. It’s working. It’s actually working.

Wham! It’s at that moment that Duncan looks up to see that he walked directly into a seven-foot tall Clem and two other members of the monster police. The terrifying Clem looks down and eyes Duncan suspiciously, yellow eyes narrowing.

CLEMHmm. I don’t remember seeing your face around here before.(beat)What’s your story?

DUNCANM-My story?

ZACH(to Duncan)

Yeah. You know,...your story.

DUNCANOh, yeah. Sure. My story. My story is, uh,...you know, the one with the...uh...

Duncan panics as his brain races to find an authentic sounding Goosebumps title. Clem and the other monsters grow increasingly suspicious. The moment builds and builds until-

STINEYou want to know his story? It’s called “The Beast Who Ripped the Heads of Anyone Who Asked Him Stupid Questions”. And the only reason you haven’t heard of it is because it was banned in six countries. For excessive violence.

Clem turns to Duncan for confirmation. Duncan shrugs.

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DUNCAN...It was a limited edition.

A tense beat. Is Clem buying it? Anything can happen when-

CLEMNext time watch where you’re going.

With that, Zach and the others hurriedly move on. As they do-

ZACH(to Stine)

That was close.

STINEYeah, well, fortunately for us, I wrote most of my monsters with more teeth than brains.

And then-

CLEM(o.s.)

Hey!

Zach, Stine, and the others slowly turn to see-

CLEMYou dropped something.

On those words, Clem holds up Duncan’s plastic tail...withthe price tag still attached. The jig is clearly up.

STINERun. Quickly. Now.

And they sure do. Clem and the other two monsters pursue.

Losing their masks, the four human fugitives frantically take off, rushing past the nearby SUPERMARKET and down an adjoining ALLEY.

Running as fast as they can, Zach and the others race down a narrow passageway--a brick wall on one side, a chain link fence on the other.

As the four round the corner they come to a LOCKED GATE. As Zach pulls and pulls on the gate-

CLEM(o.s.)

R.L. Stine...

Zach and the others turn to see that they are surrounded by Clem and his the Monster Police. Clem grins from ear to ear.

CLEMJust the man we’ve been looking for.

Fangs gleaming, the raptor-like Clem slowly advances when-

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ALL

HEADLIGHTS flood the scene. Zach and the others turn as-

Crash! A MINI-VAN BLASTS THROUGH THE CHAIN-LINKED FENCE, crashing into the monster police like a six-cylinder battering ram. A bumper sticker reads: I BRAKE FOR MACRAME

As the dust settles and Clem dazedly rises from the pile of debris-

The driver of the crumpled mini-van buries a cat’s CLIMBING POST across his head, knocking Clem unconscious. As the driver dazedly steps into the light we reveal--

Lorraine. Glasses cracked, hair a mess. Lorraine looks absolutely fried.

LORRAINE(to Clem)

...and stay out of my petunia garden!

We notice that Melissa sits in the back of the mini-van, safely buckled in and giggling hysterically. The kid’s have the time of her life.

ZACHAunt Lorraine.

Zach carefully approaches the frazzled Lorraine and gently pries the climbing post from his aunt’s tightly-gripped hands.

ZACHWhy don’t you let me hold that for awhile.

Smoke pours out of the mini-vans cracked engine block as Zach unbuckles his giggling sister.

ZACHHey, munchkin. Boy, am I glad to see you.

As Zach holds his sister tenderly, noise is heard in the distance. Monsters, alerted to the commotion.

STINEWe have to hurry.

LORRAINEWould someone please tell me just what the fudgesicle is going on around here?

ZACHI’ll explain along the way. C’mon!

Leaving the smoldering mini-van behind, Zach and the others race into the night.

69.

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ALL

EXT. - MAIN STREET; CITY HALL - A LITTLE LATER

A smiling picture of the MAYOR OF NORMAL is plastered on a re-election campaign poster. In the background, the terrified MAYOR hangs upside-down from a flag pole outside of city hall as a pack of VAMPIRIC FRENCH POODLES snap and snarl below.

INT. - MAYOR’S OFFICE; TOWN HALL

A graffitied globe sits on the large oakwood desk. Among some of the renamed United States: “Boo York”, “Tenne-scream”, “Ver-monster”,...An eerie sign of things to come.

Clem and his two battered companions stand before the mayor’s desk. The back of the mayor’s chair is towards them.

SLAPPY(o.s.)

You lost him?

The pint-sized Slappy spins around in the over-sized mayor’s chair. A ten foot HAMSTER draped over Slappy’s lap and chair like a James Bond villain’s white cat. Meet CUDDLES the Hamster from “Monster Blood”.

SLAPPYWhat do you mean...you lost him?

CLEMWell, it’s like I was saying,... Stine and the rest of them were heading north up Orchard when-

Off Slappy’s command, the snarling Cuddles vaults across the desk and knocks Clem to the ground. As Clem struggles against Cuddles’ snapping jaws-

CLEMSlappy, please,...we got this town sealed up tighter than a crypt. Believe me, if Stine’s here, we’ll find him.

SLAPPYWell, I certainly hope so, Clem. Because if R.L. Stine figured out a way write us into this world, then he can figure out a way to write us back out...and I did not spend the last twenty years rotting behind some Plexiglass display case just to have my plans of world domination thwarted by you!

With those words, a light bulb suddenly goes off.

SLAPPYWait...

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Ala Linda Blair, Slappy’s head turns completely around to face a framed MAP OF THE TOWN. Slappy follows Orchard street north to...the high school.

SLAPPYStine can’t write unless he has something to write with...and, fortunately, I know just what that something is.(head spins back around)Round the troops. Class is in session.

EXT. - MISTY GRAVEYARD

Stine leads the party of six through the seemingly endless maze of tombstones, thorn bushes, and gnarled trees. A creepier place you’d be hard pressed to find.

DUNCAN(to Stine; terrified)

Okay, so let me get this straight. Out of all the short cuts we could’ve taken to get to the high school, you pick the one that runs right through the creepiest graveyard in town??

STINEWhat better place to hide from monsters than the last place they’d expect to find us?

Stine has Duncan there. As Stine walks he scratches himself. First a little. Then a lot. The more he tries not to scratch, the more he does. It’s actually kind of amusing...

DUNCANAre you breaking out in-

STINE(defensively)

Yes, I’m breaking out in hives, okay? It happens when I’m under a lot of stress. Some people sweat. I itch. Just one of the many joys of being me.

LORRAINEUhm, you know, I might have some calamine lotion in my bag.

Holding Melissa, Lorraine checks her bag.

STINE...Thank you. (beat)I like your pocket book.

LORRAINEI made it myself.

71.

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ALL

As the two move on Zach follows behind. Hannah appears at Zach’s side and attempts to lighten the mood.

HANNAHSo,...if this is our first date, I can’t imagine what you have planned for our second.

ZACH(amused)

A date? Is that what you call this?

HANNAHWell, I admit, it’s not what I was expecting, but with an uncle like mine, this is probably about as close to a date as I’m ever going to get.

Zach smiles. A beat, then-

HANNAHHey, look,...back at the house... I’m sorry if I acted like a jerk before. After all, you were only trying to save my life.

ZACHYeah, and a real bang-up job I did of that. Not only did I not save the girl, but I also managed to bring on a full-fledged “monsterpocalypse” in the process. (ashamed)Some hero I turned out to be. My dad would be so proud.

HANNAHHey, “anyone who doesn’t screw up isn’t trying hard enough”. Say what you will about your methods, but a screw-up this big doesn’t happen without some serious effort.(beat)Besides, end of the world or not, it’s nice to know I have somebody looking out for me.

ZACH(shrugs)

Hey,...what are neighbors for?

As the two exchange warm smiles-

Playful laughter is heard as Zach and Hannah see that Lorraine is flirting with Stine.

HANNAHIs it me or is your aunt flirting with my uncle?

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ZACHAfter tonight...nothing would surprise me.

On those words, the MOON peers out from behind the clouds projecting its light through the trees. As it does-

--we reveal that Hannah is completely transparent in the moonlight. Upon seeing the sight, a thunderstruck Zach goes white. Hannah clearly has no idea what’s gotten Zach so rattled.

HANNAHZach,...what’s wrong? You look like you’ve seen a-

ZACHDon’t say it.

HANNAHSay what? Are you alright?

With that, a concerned Hannah steps out of the moonlight, once again returning to her normal form. A beat, then-

ZACHWould you excuse me for just one second?

A shaken Zach quickly hurries away, pulling Duncan as he goes. Hannah stares confused.

BEHIND CRYPT; MOMENTS LATER

As the group takes a break, Stine applies more calamine lotion to his chest and face when-

ZACH(o.s.)

Hannah doesn’t know, does she?

Stine turns to see a stone-faced Zach behind him. Heart-broken, Zach’s eyes shoot daggers at Stine.

STINEDoesn’t know what?

ZACHThat she’s not real. That she’s just another one of your damn monsters.(angrily approaches)Don’t bother trying to deny it. Duncan already filled me in on all the details. “The Ghost Next Door” by R.L. Stine. Apparently, it was was one of your biggest sellers.

Stine pulls Zach to the side. Talks low and stern.

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STINEOkay, now you listen to me. I don’t know what it is you think you know, but let’s get one thing straight-- my Hannah is no “monster”... She’s an angel.

ZACHAn angel, huh? Is that why you keep her a prisoner in her own home? Afraid she might fly away when she finally figures out the truth.

STINEYou have no idea what you’re talking about. When Hannah found her way out of her story she was alone. Scared. She had no idea what she was or where she came from.

ZACHSo, what, you lied to her? Made up some crap about her being your niece.

STINEI was only trying to protect her. Keep her safe.

ZACHBullshit. You didn’t do this for her. You did it for yourself.

STINEAnd what if I did? Is that so wrong? You see how I live. I’m just as much a prisoner as my monsters are. Before Hannah came along I didn’t have anyone. No friends, no family...But now...

A somber beat, then-

STINEDon’t you understand? Hannah’s the closest thing to a daughter I’m ever going to have.

Zach takes this in. It’s so tragic it’s almost understandable. Still...

ZACHIf you care for her as much as you say you do, then you can’t let her go on believing that she’s something she’s not. You have to tell her the truth.

HANNAH(o.s.)

The truth about what?

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ALL

Zach turns to see Hannah. Awkward silence follows.

HANNAHThe truth about what?

Then, before this can go any further a FOREBODING HOWL is heard in the distance. Several more follow. Hearts stop. Heads turn as we reveal-

THE BEASTS FROM THE EAST--A pack of blood-thirsty, blue-furred monsters; all the size of grizzly bears with the ferocity of timber wolves.

Zach and the others go white.

ZACHIt can wait.

With that, Zach, Stine, and the others frantically race through the cemetery, vaulting over headstones like hurtles. Lorraine holds Melissa close as Zach protectively ushers them over the jagged landscape. Fangs drooling, the galloping beasts pursue from the east.

ZACHWhat the hell are those things?

DUNCANBeasts from the East.

ZACH(duh)

I mean, what book?

STINEThat is the book!

As Zach races through the mist, a BEAST lunges at him, burying its fangs into--an ANGEL STATUE. In the mist, even the beasts have a tough time finding their way. Cracking its snout on the stone angel, The furious beast shakes off the blow and continues its pursuit.

CEMETERY GATES

As Stine and the others quickly slip through the rusty bars on the cemetery’s eastern gate, Zach helps the women through when-

DUNCANI’m stuck!

Wedged between the narrow bars, Duncan shuffles and squirms, but simply can’t fit his pudgy frame through the gate. Stine and Zach grab Duncan and pull...and pull. As they do-

DUNCAN(panicked)

Pull harder!!

75.

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ALL

STINE(to Duncan)

Okay, just calm down. Try to relax. Picture yourself on a warm beach...a snowy mountain-

ZACHShut-up!

DUNCANShut-up!

Setting its ravenous sights on Duncan, the LEAD BEAST grows closer and when-

Wham! The snarling beast slams its jaws into the wrought-iron bars as Duncan is forcefully pulled out of harm’s way.

Stine, Zach, and Duncan all the hit the ground with a thud. A relieved beat, then-

DUNCANWhy do they always go after me?!

Suddenly--the ground shakes. Trees shiver. Lorraine and Hannah share uneasy glances. The signs are clear--Moremonsters are coming. A lot more. As the sound of the approaching monsters grows louder and closer-

STINEC’mon!

The pack of rampaging beasts attempt to chew their way through the steel gate as Stine and the others race towards the distant-

EXT. - NORMAL HIGH SCHOOL

Unaware of the situation unfolding across town, the high school’s Halloween Dance is in full swing.

INT. - GYMNASIUM

As TEENS dance and socialize, Davidson and his buddies harass the SCIENCE CLUB GEEKS. Even Alison seems to be getting a little tired of her boyfriend’s antics.

As an annoyed SCIENCE GEEK gets his plastic Vulcan ears yanked off by Davidson-

DAVIDSON(to the freshman)

Relax, dude. I’m just messin’ with you.

INT. - PHYSICAL EDUCATION OFFICE

Gale is there, fruitlessly trying the phone. The line’s dead. Just like all the rest. Strange. Suddenly, Gale notices four distant figures rushing across the school yard and towards the gym. Zach is among them.

76.

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ALL

EXT. - SCHOOL YARD

Reaching the school, Stine ushers the others ahead as he brings up the rear.

STINEGo! Go!

GALE(o.s.)

...Zach?

A breathless Zach turns to see his mother exiting the school as the others quickly rush in.

GALEZach, what are doing here? I thought you had “plans”.

A horrified Lorraine hurriedly races past and into the school. A bedazzled blur. Gale stares confused.

GALEWas that aunt Lorraine and your sister?

ZACH(pulling Gale along)

Mom, I’ll explain everything later, but, first, you have to get inside and lock the doors.

GALE(pulling away)

Zach, I’m not going anywhere until you tell me what’s going on.

But before Zach can respond, Gale hears the sounds of the distant PAWS pounding...WINGS flapping...JAWS snapping ...CLAWS scraping...

Gale turns as we reveal EVERY GOOSEBUMPS MONSTER charging out of the mist and towards the school like a supernatural tidal wave. We’ve never seen this many monsters in one place before and it is truly a sight to behold.

Gale goes white.

ZACHI told you we should’ve moved to Hawaii.

INT. - GYMNASIUM

The two steel doors that lead to the schoolyard are slammed closed and locked. With everyone safely inside, Stine rushes up to Principal Chapman.

PRINCIPALMr. Shivers...?

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ALL

STINEPrincipal Chapman, do you remember that typewriter I donated to the school about a year ago?

But before the Principal can answer-

STINEYeah, well, I’m going to need to have that back.

As Stine leads the Principal away, TEENS gather around the gym’s barred windows to see what’s going on outside.

TEEN #1(off the monsters)

Dude, those are the worst Halloween costumes I’ve ever seen...

EXT. - HIGH SCHOOL

More MONSTERS appear. Big ones. Small ones. Living, dead, and other. The monster horde strategically spreads out around the school, positioning themselves at every exit and entrance...

INT. - HIGH SCHOOL; THEATER, PROP CLOSET

The door flies open revealing Stine’s Smith Corona TYPEWRITER among the other theater props. Stine and Zach are there, eyes fixed on their only hope.

STINELucky for us this year’s high school production is “Desk Set” instead of “Brigadoon”.

Stine grabs his typewriter, bringing us to-

STAGE; DESK

Stine sits at the desk. Sets the typewriter down. Paper is sent through the roller.

With that, Stine rolls up his sleeves and sets out to write the ultimate Goosebumps story...one capable of containing every single monster he ever created.

As Stine places his hands over the keys, his fingers begin to tremble violently. Stine cracks his knuckles and tries again. Again, his fingers tremble violently and uncontrollably. Stine pulls his hands away. A beat then-

ZACHMr. Stine,...we can’t trap your monsters in a Goosebumps story until we have a story to trap them with.

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STINELook, I’m doing the best I can. Okay?

Clearly, Stine’s absolutely terrified to type a single word. Zach attempts some words of encouragement.

ZACH(trying to sell it)

Come on. How hard can this be? After all, you’re R.L. Stine. One of the greatest horror writers that ever lived.

STINE(not buying)

How would you know? I thought you never read any of my books.

ZACHYeah, well,...that doesn’t make them any less great.

This offers Stine little comfort. Zach tries again.

ZACH(sincere)

Hey,...you can do this.

Stine eyes Zach, troubled. A hopeless beat, then-

STINEAnd what if I can’t? (beat)What if I only make things worse?

Seeing himself in Stine, Zach offers a sympathetic smile.

ZACH(echoing his mother’s words)

I’d like to see you try.

On those words, Zach heads out, leaving the troubled Stine alone with his thoughts. Stine studies the blank page. A pensive beat, then-

Stine takes a courageous breath, steadies his trembling fingers, and types the title of his tale.

THE LONG HALLOWEEN

BY R.L. STINE

Then, underneath-

A TRUE STORY

Finding inspiration in the evening’s actual events, Stine begins to type.

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STINE“It was a Halloween that no one would ever forget...”

INT. - HALLWAY

As Zach rushes back to the gym he turns the bend, bumping into Hannah.

ZACHAh!

Startled, Zach jumps like he’s just seen a...well, you know.

HANNAHSorry. I didn’t mean to scare you.

ZACHScare me? You? Why would anyone ever be scared of someone like you?

Zach’s clearly unnerved by Hannah. It shows.

HANNAHWell, if you’re not scared of me...then how come you’re standing so far away from me.

Zach realizes that Hannah is right.

HANNAHZach, what’s going on? One minute you want to “save the girl”, the next,...you don’t want to be anywhere near her.(hurt)I don’t understand. I thought you liked me.

ZACHI do like you. It’s just...(conflicted beat)Hannah, listen to me. There’s something you need to know.

But before Zach can continue, a breathless Duncan appears.

DUNCANUhm, guys. Our situation has not improved.

EXT. - SCHOOL

More monsters have gathered. A lot more. The entire school is surrounded by a legion of Slappy’s literary minions. Clem and the monster police are there.

MONSTER POLICE #1Okay, the school’s surrounded. So, now what?

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CLEMNow we wait. Our orders are to hold position and make sure nobody gets in or out. Slappy wants to handle this one personally.

INT. - GYMNASIUM

The music is off. The party is over. Fear and panic spread like wildfire. Although no one understands what’s happening they sure as hell understand that it’s not good. Principal Chapman does his best to keep his faculty and students calm.

PRINCIPAL(into the mike)

Alright, everyone, please, just remain calm. There’s no reason to panic. Help is on the way.

ZACH(o.s.)

Help?

The Principal turns as Zach, Duncan, and Hannah rush in.

ZACHThere’s no one coming to help us.

Teachers and students react accordingly.

DAVIDSONAnd how would you know, Pooper?

ZACHBecause, right now, anyone who could help us can’t even help themselves. (to all)The town is under attack. If you don’t believe me, just take a look outside and see for yourself.

GALEHe’s right. Look, I don’t know what’s going on around here anymore than the rest of you, but I do know that we can’t just sit around here waiting for help that’s never going to come.

COACH GARRISON(terrified)

So, what are we supposed to do??

The question hangs. No one has an answer. Then-

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ZACHWell,...we can start by reinforcing those doors and windows.(to the WOOD SHOP TEACHER)Mr. Cross. You gotta have some extra plywood lying around in shop class.

WOOD SHOP TEACHERAre you kidding? I have enough plywood to build an ark.

ZACHWell, let’s hope it won’t come to that.(to Mr. Campbell)Mr. Campbell, those canisters in the chemistry lab are marked hazardous for a reason. I think it’s time we find out why.

JANITORThere’s some sheet metal in the store room.

VICE PRINCIPALAnd some bicycle chains in the lost and found. We could use them to secure the fire exits.

As murmurs of hope and uncertainty fill the air-

ZACH(to all)

Okay, people, what are we waiting for? Let’s look busy.

With that, the teachers and students spring into action. Zach turns to see his mother eyeing him proudly. Apparently, Zach is more like his father than he thinks.

ZACHWhat?

GALENothing.

The CLASS PRESIDENT approaches Zach.

CLASS PRESIDENTWhat do you need from me?

ZACHThat depends. Who are you?

CLASS PRESIDENTThe class president.

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ZACHMr. President, we need to get every student armed with any weapon they can find. I suggest you start with the athletic department.

GYM; ATHLETIC DEPARTMENT

Anything that can be used as a weapon is grabbed. BATS, GOLF CLUBS, HOCKEY STICKS...

WOOD SHOP

Supplies are gathered. WOODEN PLANKS, POWER DRILLS, NAIL GUNS...

KITCHEN

STEAK KNIVES are snatched. ROLLING PINS are grabbed. Getting an idea, Duncan lifts a huge pot of MASHED POTATOES out of the refrigerator.

HALLWAYS/LOBBY/DOORS

Doors are hastily sealed with BIKE CHAINS and PADLOCKS from students’ lockers. WOOD PLANKS are nailed across windows. DESKS are piled up against every entrance. Zach, Duncan, and Hannah are there, working alongside the rest.

Duncan smears mashed potatoes he gathered from the cafeteria all over the windows. Zach stares confused.

ZACHMashed potatoes?

DUNCAN(explaining)

Garlic mashed potatoes.

Duncan gesture to the distant VAMPIRES--all keeping their distance. Zach smiles, impressed. Meanwhile...

EXT. - SCHOOL; STREET

The driverless automobile from “The Haunted Car” pulls up like a limousine. The back door opens on its own as Slappy and Cuddles step out. Clem and the rest of the monster police are there to greet him.

CLEMYou were right. Stine’s inside.

SLAPPYWell, then,...let’s go meet our maker.

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INT. - SCHOOL; VARIOUS HALLWAYS

Looks more like a fort under siege. TEACHERS and STUDENTS work in squadrons, each stationed at different entrances. Gale is among them. Hockey and football gear is worn like armor.

GYMNASIUM

The gym acts as the command center. Lorraine is there, both baby-sitting Melissa as well as using her arts and craft skills to help create WEAPONS out of SCHOOL SUPPLIES.

INT. - LIBRARY

Goosebumps books are pulled off the shelves like survival guides.

INT. - CLASSROOM

Duncan stands before the chalkboard. Teachers and students fill the desks. The chalkboard is covered with the names of every Goosebumps monster and their weakness.

DUNCANAlright, so let’s go over this again.(off the chalk board)The scarecrows are afraid of fire, the Splatters are afraid of high-pitched noises, the witches are afraid of prune juice...

MR. CAMPBELLWhat about the Giant Germ?

DUNCANThe Giant Germ?

Duncan grabs the book that Mr. Campbell’s reading.

DUNCAN(off the book)

Dude, that’s “The Magic School Bus”.

Duncan shoves a Goosebumps book in Mr. Campbell’s hand. Mr. Campbell shuffles embarrassed.

FRONT LOBBY - MOMENTS LATER

Armed with athletic equipment, Zach, Hannah, and the other students prepare for the impending monster invasion when-

SLAPPY(v.o.)

Attention, students and faculty of Normal High...

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EXT. - FOOTBALL FIELD

Slappy speaks into the mike, his voice booming over the loudspeakers.

SLAPPYYou have until the count of ten to hand over Stine and surrender yourselves for immediate termination and/or enslavement.One, two,...ten.

INT. - HIGH SCHOOL

Needless too say, no one budges.

EXT. - FOOTBALL FIELD

SLAPPYFine, we’ll do this the hard way. Clem, remind the humans why they’re afraid of that dark.

CLEMWith pleasure.

INT. - HIGH SCHOOL; LOBBY

Zach cautiously peers past the wooden planks that bar the front door to see--SLAPPY’S ARMY OF MONSTERS, all converging on the high school in every direction.

ZACHOkay, get ready! Here they come!!

And, with that, the battle for Normal High begins.

INT. - SCHOOL; VARIOUS HALLWAYS

Windows are shattered. Barricades are splintered as STINE’S MONSTERS invade Normal High.

INT. - SCHOOL; LOBBY

Zach, Duncan, and Hannah are there, fighting alongside the other students against Slappy’s minions. Among some of the sights:

In the CHEMISTRY LAB animated SCARECROWS are fended off with BUNSEN BURNERS.

In the KITCHEN MUTANT INSECTS are swatted out of the air with TENNIS RACKETS.

In the BOY’S BATHROOM invading SERPENTS are blown out of the toilets with CHERRY BOMBS.

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On the roof the ARCHERY TEAM fires arrows at anything with fur, scales, or tails.

As the heat of battle grows even hotter-

DAVIDSON(pushing past)

Out of the way, Pooper.

Davidson and his friends hurriedly rush past. Duncan notices that someone’s missing from their group.

DUNCAN(to Davidson)

Hey, where’s Alison?

DAVIDSON(too terrified to care)

Uh,...

Suddenly, Alison’s SCREAMS are heard coming from the nearby art room. A terrified Davidson bolts away from the scene. Zach and Duncan quickly rush around the bend to see-

The abandoned Alison--trapped against the far corner of the art room. The drooling WEREWOLF OF FEVER SWAMP closes in on the trembling cheerleader when-

DUNCANHang on, Alison!

With that, Duncan courageously charges into the classroom.

ZACHDuncan, what the hell are you doing?!

DUNCAN(terrified)

Faking it!

At the same time-

INT. - ART ROOM

As the Werewolf of Fever Swamp moves in for the kill-

Duncan jumps on the back of the raging lycanthrope and buries his teeth into the werewolf’s hide.

But to Zach’s surprise, the werewolf howls in pain as his flesh SMOKES and SIZZLES from Duncan’s bite. Hurling Duncan aside, the wounded werewolf leaps out the nearest window and into the night. Spitting hair out of his mouth, Duncan rushes to Alison’s side.

DUNCAN...are you okay?

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ALISONYeah, I think so.(beat)How did you...?

Duncan opens his mouth.

DUNCANSilver fillings.

With that, Duncan helps Alison to her feet as Zach rushes in. Davidson and his friends sheepishly appear behind him.

DUNCANHey, Davidson, I hope you’ve got an extra pair of gym shorts in your locker...because it looks like you’re going to need them.

Suddenly embarrassed, Davidson examines his pants for any “unexpected stains”. As he does-

DUNCANRelax, Davidson.(beat)I’m just messin’ with you.

With that, Duncan escorts Alison out of the room. And, for a brief moment, Duncan feels like one of those comic book heroes he’s always reading about.

INT. - HALLWAY

As Zach, Hannah, and Duncan regroup among the mayhem, Hannah notices that Duncan’s arm has been injured from the werewolf.

HANNAHDuncan, you’re hurt.

DUNCANIt’s just a scratch.

As Duncan bandages his wound, a white-faced Stine appears.

STINEWe have a problem.

INT. - THEATER - MOMENTS LATER

Stine hopeless bangs the typewriter keys, but nothing appears on the page. Zach pulls out the depleted INK RIBBON. Duncan and Hannah stare, shattered.

ZACH...You ran out of ink.

Duncan eyes the DOZENS OF PAGES piled beside the typewriter.

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DUNCAN(to Stine)

Well, why did you have to make the story so long anyway? “Monsters lose. Good guys win.” The end!

STINEIt’s not that simple. These are Goosebumps monsters we’re dealing with. The only way we’re going to be able to capture them is by trapping them in the same kind of story they escaped from.

HANNAHWithout any ink, we’re not going to be able to trap them in anything.

Stine quietly resumes banging his head on the desk as Zach’s mind races.

ZACHThere’s gotta be more typewriter ink around here somewhere.

STINEDoes this look like an Office Depot to you??

ZACHOkay, so, then, we’ll improvise. If we can’t find any ink, we’ll just have to make some.

DUNCANMake some?? And how the heck are we supposed to do that?

WHIP CUT TO:

INT. - GYM - MOMENTS LATER

LORRAINE(to Zach)

One cup of grape juice. Three tablespoons of vinegar. Two teaspoons of baking soda. And one pinch of salt.(beat)Why do you ask?

WHIP CUT TO:

INT. - CAFETERIA; KITCHEN - MOMENT LATER

Vinegar. Baking soda. Salt. As the battle wages on outside, Zach, Duncan, and Hannah prepare the proper ingredients.

ZACHWhere’s the grape juice?!

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DUNCAN(raiding the fridge)

Apple...Cranberry...Dude, there’s no grape!

HANNAHNo grape? So now what are we going to do?

But before Zach can answer--A BUG-EYED ALIEN appears in the kitchen doorway, aiming its death ray directly at Zach. Just before the Bug-Eyed Alien opens fire-

Boom! The Bug-Eyed Alien explodes into pieces as the SCIENCE CLUB appears on the scene. A SCIENCE GEEK proudly holds up his modified weapon of choice.

SCIENCE GEEKFirework-firing rocket launcher. (beaming)The is the greatest day of my life.

With that, the excited science geeks eagerly move on. As they do--

Zach, Duncan, and Hannah all turn their eyes to the alien’s disgusting remains--BUBBLING PURPLE GOOK. A thoughtful beat, then-

INT. - THEATER - MOMENTS LATER

Zach hands Stine the typewriter ribbon, filled with ink and ready to go. Stine beams, thrilled.

STINEYou did it! You found- (off the suspicous-looking ink)Wait. Is this-

A grossed-out beat, then-

STINENevermind.

With that, Stine gets back to work Zach and the others rush out to rejoin the battle.

DUNCAN(off Stine)

I just hope this story has a happy ending.

INT. - VARIOUS HALLWAY

As a PITCHING MACHINE fires off baseballs at invading monsters like an assault rifle-

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INT. - UPSTAIRS HALL

As Zach, Duncan, and Hannah rush down the upstairs hall-

Smash! A TENTACLE blast in through the window in front of Zach and Hannah.

ZACHLook out!

With that, Zach tackles Hannah as the tentacle sweeps across overhead. Dust, glass, and rubble shower the scene.

As the tentacle disappears, Zach looks up to see that he’s lying on top of Hannah. And, for that one brief moment it’s like there’s no one in the school but them.

HANNAHSo,...what’s this big secret you’ve been trying to tell me all night?

But as Zach looks into Hannah’s emerald green eyes-

ZACHYou know what? It’s not important.

And it isn’t. Unfortunately, before the tender moment can go any further-

DUNCAN(o.s.)

Uh, guys...

Duncan appears on the scene.

DUNCAN...we should probably keep moving.

On those words, Zach helps Hannah to her feet. As Hannah rushes forward, Duncan eyes Zach disapprovingly.

ZACH(defensively)

What?

DUNCANI didn’t say a thing.

But the implications are clear--Zach’s in love with a ghost. With that, the three hurry on.

INT. - WESTERN WING

Piled desks are sent flying as a PLATOON OF RAMPAGING GRAVEYARD GHOULS bursts through the western entrance when-

GALENow!!

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With that, a fire hose is turned on. A BLAST OF PRESSURIZED WATER fires out as Gale keeps the graveyard ghouls at bay.

GALE(to her students)

Go! Go! Get back to the gym!

As the students obey Gale’s wishes, Gale soon finds herself alone. Unfortunately, the fire hose is just too much for one person to handle. As the spray of water whips wildly in every direction, the graveyard ghouls continue to advance when-

A NEW PAIR OF HANDS grabs the hose. Gale brightens as she turns to see Zach standing behind her. Together, Zach and Gale work as a team, knocking the graveyard ghouls off their feet and out of the school. As the last of the ghouls are blasted outside-

Zach and Gale slam the doors closed and re-chain the handles. Gale offers Zach a grateful smile. Zach returns the gesture. At last...Zach is finally there for his mom when she needs him. As Gale attempts to hug Zach-

ZACH(embarrassed)

Mom,...not at school.

Meanwhile, all around Normal High, victorious students cheer as Slappy and his monsters are fended off. At least, for the time being.

EXT. - SCHOOLYARD

As wounded and weary monsters run for cover, an unamused Slappy scowls. Then-

SLAPPYI was hoping it wouldn’t have to come to this,...

With that, Slappy withdraws a SINGLE MANUSCRIPT from under his coat. The one book that even he didn’t dare open...

Upon seeing the title of the manuscript, Clem and the other members of the monster police go white with terror. As Slappy pulls out Stine’s key and begins to unlock the book-

CLEMNo, Slappy, please. Not him. Not that guy. If you let him out there’s no telling what he might do.

SLAPPYTrue,...(grins)...but I can’t wait to find out.

On those words, Slappy unlocks the book...and boom! A hurricane blast of PINK SLIME brings us to-

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INT. - GYMNASIUM

The SCHOOL NURSE is there to aid the wounded as teachers and students prepare for the next wave of Slappy’s attack.

ZACH(to some students)

We need more wood in the art room, more chains in the kitchen, and more bodies in the front lobby.

As the students hurriedly obey Zach’s orders Zach prepares for round two when he stops upon hearing his sister’s cries.

With Gale helping with the barricades, Lorraine tries to comfort the crying Melissa, but the little girl’s tears refuse to dry. Zach approaches.

LORRAINEI tried everything, but I just can’t get her to stop.

Zach considers this.

ZACHI think I know something that might work.

MOMENTS LATER

Sitting in the corner, Melissa lies asleep in Zach’s arms as Zach reads the school library copy of “Good Night Moon”.

ZACHGood night stars, good night air,Good night noises everywhere.

GALE(o.s.)

And just when I thought I’dseen everything...

Zach looks up to see a smiling Gale.

ZACHI didn’t do the silly voice. ...Dad always did the silly voice.

GALEWell, your dad had a lot more practice than you.

ZACHBoy, I wish dad was here now. He’d know exactly what to do.

Outside, monsters roar and screech. Zach tightens nervously...and hates himself for doing it.

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ZACHAnd he wouldn’t be scared of some dumb monsters either.(beat)Dad wasn’t afraid of anything.

Gale sits beside her children and regards Zach seriously.

GALEZach, your dad was the bravest man I ever knew...and not because he wasn’t afraid of anything, but because he was.

Zach stares confused. Gale explains.

GALEBeing afraid doesn’t make you any less brave. Sometimes it takes being afraid to find out just how brave you really are.

As Zach takes this in, panicked teachers and teens rush toward the barred windows. Clearly something outside has gotten their attention.

ZACHWhat now?

Hannah rushes toward Zach.

HANNAHZach,...you better come see this.

As Zach follows the other’s gaze out the window-

ZACHOh, no...

EXT. - SCHOOL PARKING LOT

An opened, slime-covered manuscript lies in the center of the street. Its familiar title--”The Blob That Ate Everyone”.

Cars are ingested. Bicycles are devoured. Broken glass and half-eaten steel shower the scene as terrified monsters scatter for cover. Clearly, whatever abomination Slappy released cannot be controlled. As one member of the monster police makes a run for it-

A PINK, SLIMY APPENDAGE snags the monster off his feet, reels him in, and swallows him whole. With that, we reveal-

--the two hundred foot-tall gelatinous mass from R.L. Stine’s “The Blob That Ate Everyone”--the BLOB. Stine’s largest and most deadly monster. A sight as awesome as it is horrifying.

SLAPPY(o.s.)

And who says you can’t judge a book by its cover?

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The enormous Blob turns to see Slappy standing alone in the middle of the street.

SLAPPYSo glad to see you’ve worked up an appetite...(off the school)I just hope you’ve left some room for dessert.

The ravenous blob fixes it gaze on the school and grins hungrily. At the same time-

INT. - THEATER

Stine types feverishly. Page after page. Chapter after chapter. Duncan sits nearby and proof-reads, making certain that every monster is accounted for in Stine’s story.

STINE(typing; writing)

“Little did our heroes know that when they reached the high school their problems had only just begun...”

DUNCANYou left out Vamporilla.

Stine turns to Duncan. Huh?

DUNCANVamporilla. You know, half gorilla--half vampire bat. From “The Deadly Experiments of Dr. Eek”.

Duncan shows Stine the page. Duncan’s right. No Vamporilla.

STINEGood thing you caught that.There’s just been so many books...so many monsters...It’shard to keep track of them all.

DUNCANHey, that’s what fans are for.

An appreciative Stine smiles. Then-

Wham! The entire school rocks. The ceiling cracks. As it does, a drop of PINK SLIME oozes in and lands on Stine’s desk. Stine and Duncan exchange horrified glances, both realizing the implications.

Wham! The school rocks again. Stine quickly grabs the typewriter and his pages and rushes out. Duncan follows.

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EXT. - SCHOOL

Having covered Normal High with its gelatinous mass, the enormous blob slowly begins to devour the school.

INT. - HALLWAY

Pink slime crashes through the windows. Bubbles up under the doors. Panicked students and teachers retreat for cover.

INT. - GYMNASIUM

With nowhere left to hide, everyone takes shelter in the gym, a rattled Stine among them.

ZACH(to Stine; off the blob)

Friend of yours?

STINE(off the blob)

“The Blob That Ate Everyone”.

ZACH(at wit’s end)

Would it have killed you to write a joke book every once in awhile?!

Glass shatters. The walls quake as plaster falls.

EXT. - SCHOOL

The west wing crumples as the blob continues to slowly devour the entire high school, brick by brick.

INT. - SCHOOL

As Gale comforts Melissa, Duncan and Hannah appear by Zach and Stine.

DUNCANSo, now what do we do? That thing’s gonna tear through here any second and Stine still has to write the ending of the story.

Zach considers their dilemma long and hard, then-

ZACHThe school buses. How many buses are here?

DUNCANUh, three, I think.

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ZACHOkay, we’ll put everyone we can fit onto one bus, then we’ll send the other two off in opposite directions. If Slappy takes the bait, we’ll have a one in three chance of getting out of here alive. It might not be much, but anything’s better than just sticking around and waiting to be devoured.

STINENo, no, that won’t work. Monsters can smell fear.(off the terrified students)No matter how many decoy buses we use, they’ll still be able to sniff us out.

Frustrated, Zach slams his hands against the refreshment table. As his eyes fall upon the stacks of soda-

ZACHI think I have a really bad idea.

EXT. - NORMAL HIGH SCHOOL

The steel letters that spell “Normal High” are swallowed whole as the rampaging blob makes its way into the school.

INT. - HALLWAY

Teens and teachers race down the abandoned hallways as the insatiable blob penetrates the school’s interior. Zach hurriedly ushers them along.

ZACHC’mon! Go! Go! Go!

DAVIDSON(to all)

You heard Cooper. Move your butts!

No longer being referred to as “Pooper”, Zach stares at Davidson, stunned.

ZACH...“Cooper”?

DAVIDSON(with a newfound respect)

What? That’s your name, isn’t it?

With that, Davidson moves on. Zach follows.

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INT. - SCHOOL; GARAGE

THREE SCHOOL BUSES sit waiting. As Coach Garrison takes the wheel of one, Stine and Zach hurry the teens and teachers on board. As Lorraine hurries on a bus-

LORRAINE(to Hannah)

Hey, I know this is a bad time, but is your uncle seeing anyone?

Across the way-

ZACHC’mon! Get on!(to Gale)Mom, hurry--Get on the bus!

As Gale appears with Melissa in her arms-

GALEI’m not going anywhere without you.

ZACHMom,...look, I know things are a little scary right now, but if we work together and everybody does their part...we can get through this in one piece.

Gale frowns, having her own words used against her.

GALEUnfair.

ZACHGet.

With that, Gale reluctantly gets on the bus. As she does-

ZACH(to all)

Remember, keep your heads down and stay calm. These things can smell fear, so the calmer you are, the safer you’ll be. Now, go!

EXT. - SCHOOL; GARAGE - MOMENTS LATER

Slam! THREE SCHOOL BUSES blast out the garage doors. One after the other. The FIRST BUS goes left. The SECOND BUS goes right. The THIRD BUS goes straight.

INT. - SCHOOL BUS

Packed like sardines, terrified teachers and teens tremble, doing their best not give off anymore fear than they already are. Gale holds Melissa close. Lorraine holds Gale’s hand.

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EXT. - SCHOOLYARD

As Slappy’s minions prepare to divide and conquer-

CLEMSplit up and stop those buses!

SLAPPYWait!

Slappy sniffs the air. The other monsters do the same--all honing in on the bus that gives off the most fear.

SLAPPY(grinning)

They’re on the first one.

With that, the monsters disregard the second and third bus and charge after the first.

EXT. - ROAD

As the “fear-scented” school bus blasts down the abandoned road-

Wham! The glowing Haunted Car races beside the first bus and barrels into its side, knocking the school bus out of the street and into the neighboring cornfield. Losing control on the ragged terrain, the school bus flips over on its side and comes to a stop.

Stampeding monsters appear as Slappy and Cuddles exit the Haunted Car-

SLAPPY(to Clem)

I don’t care what you do with the others, but I want Stine alive. I have his display case already picked out...

As the monster police invade the over-turned bus we reveal-

INT. - SCHOOL BUS

The bus is empty. A hockey stick holds down the gas pedal, while a leather belt binds the wheel in place.

Hundreds of empty cans of ENERGY DRINK lie spilled everywhere, giving off the scent of epinephrine---the chemical component of fear. A label on the can emphasizes this.

Realizing he’s been tricked, Slappy picks up a can and crumples it in his wooden hand.

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EXT. - ROAD

Filled with teachers and students, the second bus races down the road away and from the school.

STINE(v.o.; typing)

“Having taken the bait, Slappy fumes as the students and teachers of Normal High escape safely into the night.”

A troubled Gale looks out the window as the third school bus disappears into the distance.

INT. - THIRD SCHOOL BUS

Stine types in the back.

STINE(typing)

“Unfortunately, for our heroes, their adventure had only just begun.”

Up in the front of the bus--Zach drives while Duncan and Hannah stand behind him.

HANNAHSince when can you drive a school bus?

ZACHSince my dad gave me my first driving lesson in his fire truck.

DUNCANSo now what?

ZACHNow, we have to get Stine as far away from this place as possible so he can finish the story.

DUNCANTurn left up ahead. We’ll take the Clover Creek Bridge right out of town and onto the main highway.

As Zach turns to do just that-

HANNAHZach, look out!

EXT. - BUS

Brakes screech. Rubber burns as the bus comes to a sudden, jarring halt. Zach and the others hop off the bus to see-

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The bridge has been completely destroyed. The bus hangs perilously close to the edge. Clearly, Slappy has done everything in his power to keep Stine from escaping town. A defeated beat, then-

ZACHOkay, we’ll just have to find another way out of town. Everybody back on the bus.

As Duncan and Hannah start to get on the bus, a transfixed Stine moves toward the rusted gates of the ABANDONED AMUSEMENT PARK that stands before them. A creepier place you could not find...

ZACHMr. Stine? Mr. Stine, we have to get moving.

STINE(inspired)

This is it. This is where it happens.

ZACHWhere what happens?

STINEThe final chapter.

Up the road, ghostly headlights can be seen approaching fast. The thundering stampede of Goosebumps monsters follow close behind.

DUNCANOh, man...We have company!

With the road blocked, Zach sees no other choice but to follow Stine’s instincts, under the gate and into

EXT. - ABANDONED AMUSEMENT PARK

As Hannah and Duncan follow Zach and Stine’s lead-

ZACH(to Hannah)

Come on, we have to find a place to hide.

(to Stine)No. Not you.

Zach’s eyes fall on one of the rusted KIDDIE STROLLERS.

ZACHYou just keep writing.

EXT. - AMUSEMENT PARK; FRONT GATES

Slappy and Cuddles hop out of the haunted car as the rest of the Goosebumps monsters appear.

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SLAPPY(to Clem)

Seal off the park. The story ends here.

EXT. - AMUSEMENT PARK

Being pushed on a kiddie stroller by Zach, Stine types as he’s hurriedly rolled along--no longer writing as much as he’s reporting. A true story in real time.

STINE(typing)

“With those ominous words, Slappy and his army of marauding monsters descended upon on the abandoned amusement park to put an end to Stine and his teenage companions once and for all.”

Crash! The north eastern gate crumples inward as a platoon of stampeding BEASTS FROM THE EAST rush in. As Zach and the others quickly retreat into a MAZE OF CONCESSION STANDS, Stine is spun around in the stroller but never stops typing.

STINE(typing)

“Frantically, the three terrified teens searched for a place to hide, but every path was blocked.”

And he ain’t kidding. SCARECROWS from the north. BOG MONSTERS from the south. Nearby, GIANT SPIDERS scramble across the rusted FERRIS WHEEL like it was a steel web.

STINE(typing)

“It was clear that there was only one place in the park left to hide.”

Caught up in their own story, all eyes go to Stine, expecting him to know where that one place is. Stine shrugs. No idea. He’s making this up as he goes. Then-

HANNAHThe fun house!

INT. - FUN HOUSE

MECHANICAL GHOULS sneer as the fun house’s doors burst open as Stine is wheeled through, still typing as he goes. Zach and the others frantically bar the fun house doors with anything they can find.

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STINE(typing)

“Taking refuge in the dilapidated fun house the three intrepid teens prepared to make their last stand against Slappy and his forces-- knowing full well that their futile efforts would be in vain.

DUNCAN(to Zach; annoyed)

Since when did this become an audio book?

With that, the rotted wood of the fun house implodes like cardboard as CLAWS, SNOUTS, and TENTACLES burst through. Zach, Hannah, and Duncan back away from the walls. Zach holds Hannah close.

There’s nowhere left to hide. Nowhere left to run. Then, as we MOVE IN on the intense-looking Stine.

STINE(typing)

“But Slappy was too late. Stine’s story had come to an end. With the final few keystrokes, Slappy and all the rest of the Goosebumps monsters disappeared back into the world of paper and ink...never to be seen again.”

Stine beams victoriously. The story is complete.

STINEThe end.

But before Stine can type those two final words on the page-

Wham! The fun house explodes into a million pieces as the massive Blob Who Ate Everything shatters the fun house like a Styrofoam box. The blast sends the typewriter sailing and Stine’s pages fluttering into the wind.

STINENo! No! No!

Stine fruitlessly attempts to grab the swirling, airborne pages, but, it’s no use. At the same time-

GREEN TENDRILS of the man-eating plant pull the three teens off their feet and over the midway. Captured, Zach, Hannah, and Duncan struggle helplessly. As they do-

SLAPPY(o.s.)

R.L. Stine...

The triumphant Slappy moves before the army of Goosebumps monsters. Slappy offers his creator a fiendish grin.

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SLAPPYThe man who made all this possible. (off the monsters)I believe you know everyone here.

ZACH(to Stine; struggling)

Run!

And then, as Stine prepares to do just that-

STINENo. No more running.

Standing his ground, a terrified but defiant Stine turns to Slappy and his monsters, facing them for the first time.

STINEAll my life I’ve ran away from my fears. I’ve hid them in stories. I’ve turned them into monsters. I gave my fears power. Well, no more. Tonight I’m taking that power back. No more running. No more hiding. It all ends here.(to Slappy)You want me, Slappy? Well, here I am. Come and get me. (bravely)I’m not afraid of you anymore.

And there it is. Stine’s finest moment. No one knows quite how to react. The teens stare. The monsters stare. Anything can happen when-

The Blob That Ate Everyone swallows Stine whole. Belch.

ZACHHoly shit.

All that’s left of Stine is his satchel and the two items that fell out--the charred manuscript cover he picked up on Main Street and the “Abominable Snowman of Pasadena” book.

Monsters cheer wildly as a horrified Hannah struggles to rip Slappy’s wooden head off.

HANNAHSlappy, you termite-ridden little parasite!!

As Hannah continues to struggle-

ZACHWait.

Zach notices the human form struggling within the Blob’s translucent innards.

ZACHHe’s still alive...

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SLAPPYWell, of course he’s still alive. Did you really think I was going to let Stine off that easy?(approaches the blob)There’s enough air bubbles floating around in there to keep his clock ticking for at least another...(checks pocket watch)...four-and-a-half minutes. (menacingly)And I’m going to savor every second.

AIR BUBBLES pop and disappear around Stine like sand in an hour glass, marking the seconds before Stine’s expiration.

SLAPPYLet’s see how he likes being the one on display for a change...

As gleeful monsters gather around to watch the show a teary-eyed Hannah continues struggling to save her uncle. Defeated, Duncan prepares for the worst.

DUNCANNow what are we going to do? The story didn’t work and Stine’s as good as blob brulee. This really is the end.

ZACHThe end...(realizing)Duncan, that’s it. Stine never got the chance to type the words “the end”. That’s why the story didn’t work--because it isn’t finished yet!

As Zach’s eyes find Stine’s typewriter lying beside the dilapidated CAROUSEL on the other side of the midway-

ZACH(whispers to Hannah)

Hannah, there still might be a chance to save your uncle but you have to do exactly as I say.

As the victorious monsters continue to watch Stine struggle-

ZACHSo, tell me something, Slappy...

Slappy turns his attention to Zach.

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ZACH...when monsters finally do rule the world,...who’s going to rule the monsters? I mean, after all, once Stine’s out of the picture, somebody’s going to have to be in charge of all his creations.

SLAPPYFor your information, somebody already is in charge. Me.

HANNAHYou?? Please. Do you really think my uncle’s monsters are going to spend the rest of their lives taking orders from a walking sock puppet?

SLAPPYHey, without this “sock puppet” these morons couldn’t find their way out of an opened grave.

Insulted monsters furrow their brows. Zach stokes the flames.

ZACHIs that so?

SLAPPYLet’s just say that there’s a reason why I’m Stine’s most popular villain. And with five sequels, two spin-off series, and my own action figure...the only one giving any orders around here is me.

An insulted CAPTAIN BEN ONE-LEG from the book “Horrorland” steps forward.

CAPTAIN BEN ONE-LEG(to Slappy)

And who rose from the dead and left you in charge?

A HEADLESS GHOST from the story of the same name holds up his head.

HEADLESS GHOSTIf anyone ought to be the head honcho around here it’s me.

An ACTURIEN ALIEN from “Zapped in Space” steps forward.

ACTURIENOr me.

Having had enough of Slappy’s antics-

CLEMOr me.

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With the stage set for a power grab, the monsters eye each other ferociously. Garden gnomes angrily begin to chime in with their own high-pitched chorus of disapproval. This could get ugly.

As Slappy’s organized army suddenly begins to turn back to an angry mob-

ZACH(to all)

Guys, guys...why don’t you just put it to a vote?

With that, all hell breaks loose as the monsters settle their disagreement the only way they know how...with a full-on monster vs. monster battle royale in the center of the midway.

Only the ravenous blob seems to have no interest in fighting, choosing, instead, to devour the concession stands.

Released from the battling plant’s grasp, Zach and the others fall to the ground with a thud.

ZACHHurry! Follow me!

Having created the diversion he was looking for, Zach bolts through the churning sea of battling monsters and towards the distant typewriter. Hannah instinctively rushes towards Stine, still trapped within the belly of the blob. More than half of the air bubbles are gone now. As Hannah watches helplessly-

ZACH(to Hannah)

Hannah, c’mon!

Knowing that the only way to save Stine is by ending the story, Hannah pulls herself away and follows behind Zach and Duncan. Fortunately, the monsters are so busy battling each other, they barely even seem to notice the fleeing teens.

Reaching the carousel first, Zach grabs the typewriter and prepares to write the two words that will finally put an end to the Goosebumps monsters once and for all-

Zach reads Stine’s final line, then pauses, his face filled with dread. As Duncan arrives second-

DUNCANWhat are you waiting for? “The end”. It’s two words. Type them!

ZACH...We can’t do this.

DUNCANWhat are you talking about?

Zach reads Stine’s final line to Duncan.

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ZACH“With a final keystroke, Slappy and all the rest of the Goosebumps monsters disappeared back into the world of paper and ink from where they came....never to be seen again.”

DUNCANYeah, so?

ZACHHannah’s one of the Goosebumps monsters. If they go...she goes with them. We’ll just have to figure out another way.

DUNCANZach, there is no other way! Now, c’mon, type the words!

But a conflicted Zach refuses to act.

DUNCANDude, if you don’t do it, I will.

As Duncan advances, Zach holds him off. The two struggle when-

Keys are heard typing. Zach and Duncan turn to see Hannah--standing in front of the typewriter, typing the final two words of Stine’s story: THE EN

ZACHHannah, wait!

As Hannah’s finger hangs over the “d”-

ZACHYou can’t finish the story.

HANNAHWhy not??

ZACHBecause if you do...

Hannah finds the words that Zach can’t.

HANNAHI’ll wind up back on a bookshelf with all the rest of my uncle’s monsters?

Off Zach’s shocked expression-

MIDWAY

As monsters brawl and Stine’s air bubbles dwindle down to the mere dozens-

Slappy notices the three teens by the typewriter. Realizing that he’s been played for a fool-

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SLAPPY(to any monster in earshot)

We’ll settle this later. Right now we have bigger problems.

With that, the monsters turn their attention to the

CAROUSEL

ZACH(to Hannah)

...You mean you knew? You knew all along?

HANNAHNo, not exactly...but I guess I’ve always had my suspicions. (tries to make light)I mean, how many fourteenth birthdays can one girl have?

ZACHHannah, you don’t understand. If you hit that key-

HANNAHI know what will happen, Zach.

As Hannah considers her decision-

HANNAHFor as long as I can remember I’ve never fit in anywhere. At least now, I know why.(beat)It’s funny, but for the first time in my life...I finally know where I belong.

The ground shakes, the carousel trembles as Zach and the others turn to see the monsters stampeding towards them.

DUNCANGuys, it’s now or never!

Hannah regards Zach sweetly...and sadly.

HANNAHUncle or not, Stine gave me my life. It’s only fair I return the favor. (beat)I’m just sorry we never got to go on that second date.

ZACHHannah, don’t--

But before Zach can finish--

Slappy and the monster horde closes in around them when-

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Stine inhales his last air bubble. Then-

Hannah hits the “d” key completing the words: THE END

And with Stine’s story now complete, a VACUUM OF HURRICANE-FORCE WIND IS, ONCE AGAIN, RELEASED upon the scene, drawing the Goosebumps monsters out of our world and back into their own. Slappy’s wooden face contorts with fury.

SLAPPYNo!!!!!!

As the loose pages of Stine’s final novel flutter through the air--monsters are forcefully yanked off their feet and into each individual page.

Whoosh! Whoosh! Whoosh! One after the other, Slappy’s monster minions are sucked back into a world of paper and ink. Cuddles the Hamsters, Clem and the Monster Police, The Blob That Ate Everyone...

As the humongous blob is sucked into the twelve inch page Stine tumbles out of the blob’s innards and onto the ground, gasping for air. Slimed and winded, but otherwise unharmed.

As the monsters continue to be pulled into Stine’s story, Duncan snatches the fluttering pages out of the air, hurriedly gathering every stray sheet.

As Hannah prepares herself to join the others, Zach grabs her and holds her desperately.

ZACHMaybe if I hold you tight enough, then, maybe...maybe...

But it’s pointless and they both know it. Hannah offers Zach a consoling smile.

HANNAHZach,...do you still want to save the girl?

Zach nods.

HANNAHThen let go.

But Zach just can’t do it.

HANNAHIt’s okay, Zach. I’m not afraid.

ZACHI know...I am.

Smiling, Hannah leans forward and kisses Zach gently on the cheek. And, with that, Zach slowly and reluctantly lets Hannah go. And then-

Whoosh! Hannah, along with the rest of Stine’s monsters, disappears right before Zach’s eyes.

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As the last of Stine’s “literary manifestations” follows suit-

With all the pages in hand, Duncan grabs the CHARRED MANUSCRIPT COVER from Stine’s spilled satchel and places all the pages inside. With that, he slams the cover closed and locks it...trapping all the pages and monsters within.

And, just like that, the wind dies down as silence resumes.

Zach stands alone. As he does, he notices something on the ground. Hannah’s broken-heart necklace. Zach picks it up as Duncan approaches.

DUNCAN(sympathetically)

Zach...

ZACHIt’s alright... (beat)She’s where she belongs.

Zach and Duncan sit in silence as Stine appears. He surveys the scene in over-joyed disbelief.

STINEWell, what do you know...It worked.

ZACHYeah,...it worked.

Stine scans the area.

STINEWhere’s Hannah?

Stine follows Zach’s solemn gaze to the book.

STINE(realizing)

No...

As Stine grabs the book from Duncan’s hands-

Zach grabs the book’s other end as he and Stine lock eyes. Zach’s expression says it all. What’s done...can’t be undone. At least not without releasing every single monster along with Hannah. There’s nothing more that needs to be said.

After an understanding beat, Zach gently releases the book as Stine places it in his leather satchel. The three stand in silence, when-

ZACHI think she wanted you to have this.

Zach hands Stine Hannah’s necklace. Stine eyes the necklace reflectively.

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STINEI got this for her on her fourteenth birthday.

A curious beat, then-

ZACHWhich one?

Stine considers the question, then-

STINEI have absolutely no idea.

It’s so crazy, it’s funny. Stine can’t help but smile. Zach smiles back. A bitter-sweet beat, then-

AMUSEMENT PARK EXIT - MOMENTS LATER

Bruised and battered, Stine, Zach, and Duncan move out of the broken-down amusement park. Duncan chuckles to himself. Zach notices. He eyes Duncan curiously.

ZACHWhat’s so funny?

DUNCANI was just thinking...No, forget it. It’s stupid.

ZACHWhat?

DUNCANOkay, well, I was just thinking that if this was a real Goosebumps story then there’d still have to be some kind of a twist ending coming. You know, like, uh, Mr. Stine’s really an alien from another dimension,...or this was all some sort of crazy government experiment,...or,...or,...

SLAPPY(o.s.)

...or there’s one more monster still out there.

Upon hearing Slappy’s voice, the three quickly turn when-

Wham! Vaulting out of the darkness, Slappy brings the typewriter down on Stine’s skull. Stine falls. As Zach lunges towards Slappy-

ZZaappp! With a quick jolt from Slappy’s hand buzzer, Zach and Duncan are painfully knocked back to the ground.

Retrieving the MANUSCRIPT from Stine’s satchel, Slappy victoriously leap onto a barker’s stand in front of the shattered fun house--his distorted reflection is cast in a dozen different MIRRORS.

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SLAPPY(to Duncan)

Sorry, kid. But I guess you shouldn’t have closed the book before making sure that all the monsters were trapped inside.

As Stine and the others groggily get to their feet-

STINE(advancing)

Slappy-

SLAPPYNot another step!

Slappy unlocks the locked manuscript with the key.

SLAPPYNow that all your monsters are safely tucked away in one book, whoever controls the book... controls the monsters.

It’s true. Slappy has them right where he wants them.

SLAPPYIt kind of gives the phrase “puppet master” a whole new meaning, don’t you think?

Then, just as Slappy prepares to open the manuscript-

STINESlappy, I’m warning you--don’t open that book.

SLAPPYNice try, Stine...but just how stupid do you think this dummy is?

And, with that, Slappy opens the manuscript unleashing-

The Abominable Snowman of Pasadena--”Abby”, for short.

Yup, it’s at this moment we realize that Slappy grabbed the wrong manuscript from Stine’s satchel.

As Slappy looks up in horror at the beastly behemoth that stands before him-

Abby notices Slappy’s reflection in one of the fun house mirrors. Thin. Elongated. As a matter of fact, Slappy kind of looks like-

ABBY(hungrily)

Pezzzzzzz.

Confusing Slappy for a jumbo-sized Pez dispenser Abby snatches Slappy off his feet and proceeds to devour him whole. A frantic Slappy kicks and struggles.

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SLAPPYGet you hands off of me you two ton snowball. Do I look like a Pez dispenser to you?

As Slappy struggles against Abby’s crushing jaws he fixes his furious gaze on Stine.

SLAPPYThis isn’t over, Stine. You and me--we still have a score to settle. This isn’t over!

But before the gruesome scene can play out any further, Stine snatches the fallen manuscript, opens it, and--whoosh!--just, like that Slappy and Abby disappear inside. Stine quickly closes and locks the manuscript. Shaken silence, then-

DUNCANYeah,...a twist ending like that.

And, with that, we

DISSOLVE TO:

EXT. - SPRINGFIELD AVENUE - TWO WEEKS LATER

The left side of Stine’s home is covered in tarp as construction crews do their best to repair the damage.

ZACH(o.s.)

Okay, that should do it.

INT. - COOPER HOUSE

Zach’s there. Under the sink. Covered in grease, wrench in hand. He and his mom have been working on the sink all afternoon. It shows.

ZACHLet ‘er rip.

With that, Gale hesitantly turns on the faucet and--what do you know--the water comes out in a perfect stream.

Zach and Gale eyes their accomplishment, pleased.

GALEYour father would be proud.

ZACH(shrugs humbly)

I’m just doing my part. After all,...I am the man of the house.

Zach smiles. Gale smiles back. Duncan appears in the kitchen. His multi-colored shirt is as “bedazzled” as Melissa’s. A sour-faced Duncan is clearly unhappy about it.

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DUNCAN...Your aunt was helping me get ready for my date.

An excited Aunt Lorraine appears beside Duncan.

LORRAINEDoesn’t he look great?

Honk. Honk.

EXT. - FRONT PORCH

A car pulls up. Alison and her friends are there. Duncan and Zach appear on the porch. Duncan quickly pulls the gems off his shirt as Alison hangs out the passenger-side window.

ALISONCome on, Donald. We’re going to be late for the movies.

DUNCANComing!

ZACHAlison still doesn’t know your name, huh?

DUNCAN...I’m taking it slow.

Zach scans his neighbors...all are raking leaves....repairing property damage. You’d never know anything happened.

ZACHHey, is it me, or has Normal made a remarkably fast recovery for a town that just suffered a ten-point-oh monster invasion?

DUNCANAre you kidding? Tornadoes, hurricanes, political scandals... this place has a long history of sweeping disaster under the carpet.

ZACHI guess everybody just wants the same thing...

Zach eyes his mom and sister inside. For the first time, their house is actually starting to look like a home.

ZACH...for things to go back to, well, “normal”.

Honk. Honk.

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DUNCANSo, are you sure you don’t want to come along? Alison's got a lot of cute friends.

ZACHNah. Thanks anyway, but I still got one more thing left to do.

EXT. - CHESAPEAKE BAY

A lone COMMUTER FERRY sails across the calm waters.

EXT. - FERRY

Stine and Zach are there. Having finally faced his fears, Stine looks genuinely at peace. Not wrapped too tight. Not too loose. A perfect balance.

In Stine’s hands are the manuscripts for “The Long Halloween” and “The Abominable Snowman of Pasadena”. They're bound together--covered in chains, padlocks, and several more diary-style book locks.

Plunk! The chained and weighted books hit the water and disappear into the murky depths below. Zach and Stine watch them fade from sight--bonded in their loss.

STINEToo bad. “The Long Halloween” probably would’ve been my biggest seller

Having completed the task at hand Zach and Stine move to the front of the ferry as it heads toward the distant dock.

STINEYou know, ever since that day I can’t help but think that when I wrote that last line--you know, the part about “all monsters”--I don’t know...maybe some part of me knew what I was doing all along.

ZACHSo, look, I know you’re officially re-retired and all, but I was just wondering if you’ve ever gave any thought to-

Stine already sees where this is going and cuts Zach off.

STINEI’m sorry, Zach, but it’s just too dangerous. No, I’m afraid my days of writing horror novels are over.

Disappointed, Zach nods, understanding. Then-

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A TAXI pulls up by the dock. Out steps a figure. Someone is there to meet Stine--A girl. About fourteen. The exact image of Hannah. A slack-jawed Zach stares in amazement. Stine offers Zach a mischievous grin.

STINENow, romance novels, on the other hand. Well,...that’s a different story.

Heart swelling, Zach can’t believe his eyes. Upon seeing Stine, the girl waves. Stine waves back.

STINE(to Zach)

Come on. Let me introduce you to my niece. I think you two might have a lot in common.

And as Zach and Stine head off to do just that we PULL BACK to the churning, sun-dipped waves as we

FADE TO BLACK

FADE IN:

EXT. - FISHING BOAT - A FEW WEEKS LATER

A FISHING BOAT dumps its daily catch on the deck of the boat. Among the finds-

FISHERMAN #1What’s that?

FISHERMAN #2(off the cover)

R.L. Stine...(beat)I used to read his books when I was a kid.

A nostalgic Fisherman #2 eyes the faded books and rusted chains, covered in seaweed and sand.

FISHERMAN #1What? You’re actually gonna keep that junk?

FISHERMAN #2Are you kidding? They could be collectors’ items. Besides...

We see that the fishing boat is heading through the Hudson River. The distant MANHATTAN SKYLINE can be seen.

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FISHERMAN #2You know how I love a good scary story.

End.

Roll CREDITS. Then-

EXT. - LAKE - NIGHT

Alison and her friends are all there hanging out. Duncan and Alison remain in the backseat of her friend’s PARKED CAR while the others frolic on the shore.

INT. - CAR; BACKSEAT

Romantic stuff. All the stars make an appearance. Duncan is clearly more terrified of being alone with Alison then fighting an entire Goosebumps horde. Fortunately, Alison finds it adorable.

DUNCANSo,...those SATs will be here before you know it, huh?

ALISONDonald,...are you nervous?

DUNCANNervous. Me? After all I’ve been through. Please...

Alison smiles and snuggles closer when-

DUNCANOw.

ALISONI’m sorry. Did I hurt you?

DUNCAN(off his bandaged arm)

No,...it’s just my stupid arm. I really gotta have that thing looked at.

ALISONOh, poor baby. You want me to kiss the boo boo?

DUNCANKiss the--? Uhm,...uh, yeah, yeah, sure. That’d be great.

As Alison gently kisses Duncan’s wounded wrist, Duncan looks up and silently mouths an excited “yes!”. It’s about this time that Duncan notices the FULL MOON above...

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Alison suddenly stops kissing Duncan’s wrist as her eyes go wide with terror.

DUNCANWhat’s wrong? Too much cologne. I told my mom not to overdue it.

Then, Duncan sees what Alison sees--Long WOLF-LIKE HAIR growing out of his wrist. As Duncan’s nails lengthen and his teeth sharpen-

Alison screams in horror and runs out of the car.

Duncan sits alone. He somberly eyes his wolfen reflection in the rearview mirror.

DUNCANMan,...I’m never going to get a girlfriend.

BLACK *

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