from warts to wings: ten top techniques for helping clients re-write their life stories
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From Warts to Wings: Ten Top Techniques for Helping Clients Re-Write Their Life Stories. John Sommers-Flanagan, Ph.D. Department of Counselor Education University of Montana [email protected] Johnsommersflanagan.com. Intro Comments. Thanks to June and Kelly and Amanda and SDCA - PowerPoint PPT PresentationTRANSCRIPT
From Warts to Wings: Ten Top Techniques for Helping
Clients Re-Write Their Life Stories
John Sommers-Flanagan, Ph.D.
Department of Counselor Education
University of Montana
Johnsommersflanagan.com
Intro Comments Thanks to June and Kelly and Amanda and
SDCA
On my way to Spearfish [And why I wanted to get here]
The Convention Center
This Morning’s Plan Articulate 10+ key principles and strategies of
human change that you can use immediately to help clients, students, parents and yourselves rework personal narratives
A summary handout and powerpoint slides are available at johnsommersflanagan.com
Morning Plan II Organized by chapter: Each chapter has a
story, a cartoon, and a concluding principle
Caveats [June: Just do a talk that’s inspirational, funny, is consistent with the conference theme, and includes counseling strategies.]
Introduction – Expectations
The Principle
Expectations are strong narratives that create positive
transformations or cause frustration and misery
Manage your expectations or they’ll manage you.
Expectations for You
I tell a few stories that illustrate principles and strategies for creating a healthy life narrative and helping students and clients do the same
You listen, laugh at all the right times, and feel inspired
Chapter One: Two Wolves
The Principle
Feed your positive wolf
and
Be aware of and
let go of less desirable thoughts
Chapter Two: The Catatonic Woman
The Principle
We should work hard to not judge clients, students, parents,
and teachers based on their appearance or behavior…or their
Karaoke performances
Chapter Three: Emma the Great
The Principle
Use passionate rewards
and
boring consequences
(and avoid backward behavior modification)
Chapter Four:The Satanic Golden Rule
Trivia Question What is a significant problem or flaw
associated with the Satanic Golden Rule?
Possible Trivia Answers Revenge begets revenge – It never ends
You give away your power and become a negative follower instead of a positive leader
The Principle
Create your own positive respect bubble . . . and watch out for the
REVENGE IMPULSE
Chapter Five: Lemons
The Principle
The lemon IS YELLOW
It’s not what happens to us . . .
But how we think about what happens to us . . .
That causes us misery
Chapter Six: Powers of Mind
The Principle
Use the power of your mind
to creatively and relentlessly focus on your goals
Chapter Seven: Twenty Minutes
The Principle
Be non-directive enough to allow clients and students freedom
and then learn about what they’re trying to master
And remember, clients, and especially young people, may treat you with
ambivalence
Chapter Eight: Meeting Jesus at the Portland VA Hospital
The Principle
If you want genuine cooperation
Be less threatening
Chapter Nine: Learning to Growl
The Principle
Change is easier if
you make a good plan and then follow it
Chapter Ten: That Dog Don’t Hunt
The Principle
Love can overshadow
our own unique faults or warts
Bonus Chapter: Things Change with Time . . . So Pay Attention to Development
The Principle
How you work with clients and students depends on where they
are in terms of their development
Summary and Conclusions Intro: Manage your expectations Feed your positive wolf Be careful in your judgments Use passionate rewards and boring consequences Create your own respect bubble; and watch out
for revenge It’s not what happens to you . . . but how you
think . . .
Summary II Use the power of mind to focus on your goals Learn from observation and remember youth may
treat you with ambivalence If you want genuine cooperation, be less
threatening If you want to change behavior, make an new plan Love can overshadow our warts Pay attention to development