Friends CheckupFriends CheckupTake out a piece of paper, add your name, the date, Take out a piece of paper, add your name, the date,

your period, and the title.your period, and the title.Number your paper 1-10.Number your paper 1-10.Answer the check-up on page 92 of your Answer the check-up on page 92 of your 6 Decisions 6 Decisions

BookBook..Answer these questions in complete sentences.Answer these questions in complete sentences.

11.. What is popularity? Are you popular? Who is the What is popularity? Are you popular? Who is the most popular person you know in your grade? most popular person you know in your grade? 22.. What is the worst thing a friend has ever done to What is the worst thing a friend has ever done to you? Did you forgive him or her?you? Did you forgive him or her?33.. What are some ways that you compete with your What are some ways that you compete with your friends?friends?44.. In what situations would you “dump” a friend? In what situations would you “dump” a friend?

- Take out a blank piece of paper Take out a blank piece of paper and set it up for Cornell notes.and set it up for Cornell notes.

- Add your name, date, period, and - Add your name, date, period, and the title: “Friendship Survival the title: “Friendship Survival Notes”Notes”

““You will be the same person in five You will be the same person in five

years as you are today, except foryears as you are today, except for thethe people you meetpeople you meet andand the the books you books you readread.”.”

- Charles Jones- Charles Jones

Friendship Survival Friendship Survival NotesNotes

““Don’t walk in front of me, I may not follow.Don’t walk in front of me, I may not follow.

Don’t walk behind me, I may not lead.Don’t walk behind me, I may not lead.

Just walk beside me and be my friend.”Just walk beside me and be my friend.”

Surviving the Everyday Ups Surviving the Everyday Ups and Downs of Friendshipsand Downs of Friendships

Friends will always show their TRUE COLORSFriends will always show their TRUE COLORS (what kind of friend they really are) (what kind of friend they really are)

Survival Tip #1: Choose steady friends who like you for who you are, not fickle ones who like you for what you have.

Steady friends stick around during the good and the bad times.

Group DiscussionGroup Discussion

When do you need your friends the When do you need your friends the most?most?

Why do your friends enjoy spending time Why do your friends enjoy spending time with you?with you?

Survival Tip #2Survival Tip #2

Make as many Make as many friends as you friends as you can, but never can, but never center your life center your life on them.on them.

DiscussionDiscussion

What is popularity?What is popularity? Who determines who is popular?Who determines who is popular? Can a person go from being popular to Can a person go from being popular to

not being popular? If so, how?not being popular? If so, how?

PopularityPopularity Stereotypes about popularityStereotypes about popularity

Bad: stuck-up, snotty, bratty peopleBad: stuck-up, snotty, bratty people Good: Genuine, friendlyGood: Genuine, friendly

Good people don’t have to be popularGood people don’t have to be popular Popularity is secondary, not primary to greatnessPopularity is secondary, not primary to greatness

Greatness is based on your character, not your Greatness is based on your character, not your popularity.popularity.

Tip #3: Stop trying to be popular. Just be yourself, Tip #3: Stop trying to be popular. Just be yourself, be nice to everyone, and good things will followbe nice to everyone, and good things will follow

Queen Bees, Wannabees, Queen Bees, Wannabees, and Gamma Girlsand Gamma Girls

Alphas-Queen BeesAlphas-Queen Bees Protect their clique at all costs (Protect their clique at all costs (Mean Girls)Mean Girls) Popularity means everythingPopularity means everything

Betas-WannabeesBetas-Wannabees Will do whatever it takes to be in good with the Will do whatever it takes to be in good with the

Queen BeesQueen Bees Gamma GirlsGamma Girls

Comfortable in their own skinComfortable in their own skin Not meanNot mean SmartSmart Think being popular is overratedThink being popular is overrated

Friendship Tip #4Friendship Tip #4

If you are tired of playing the Queen Bee If you are tired of playing the Queen Bee and Wannabee game, be a Gamma Girl.and Wannabee game, be a Gamma Girl.

DiscussionDiscussion

Is the example from Valhalla High School Is the example from Valhalla High School applicable to TLH? Do we have “Queen applicable to TLH? Do we have “Queen Bees. Wannabees, and Gamma Girls” Bees. Wannabees, and Gamma Girls” here?here?

Quirks, Faults, & FoiblesQuirks, Faults, & Foibles

Your friends are human, tooYour friends are human, too They will make mistakesThey will make mistakes They will have bad daysThey will have bad days

““Don’t sweat the small stuff” and “Choose Don’t sweat the small stuff” and “Choose your battles” are other ways of saying…your battles” are other ways of saying…

Tip #5 Be quick to forgive your friends all Tip #5 Be quick to forgive your friends all their little faults, just as you hope they’ll their little faults, just as you hope they’ll forgive yours.forgive yours.

DiscussionDiscussion

What are common What are common mistakes friends make?mistakes friends make?

What are things that What are things that cross the line?cross the line?

How long does it How long does it normally take you to normally take you to forgive one of your forgive one of your friends?friends?

Gossipers and BulliesGossipers and Bullies Boys often bully by Boys often bully by

threatening or pushing threatening or pushing someone up against a lockersomeone up against a locker

Girls often bully in more subtle Girls often bully in more subtle ways through backbiting, ways through backbiting, gossip, exclusion, rumors, etc.gossip, exclusion, rumors, etc.

Tip #6 If people are gossiping Tip #6 If people are gossiping about you or you’re being about you or you’re being bullied, confront the bully or bullied, confront the bully or find a way to live above it.find a way to live above it.

Crabs and CompetitionCrabs and Competition

““Thinking Win-Win doesn’t mean you Thinking Win-Win doesn’t mean you cave in and let your friends walk all over cave in and let your friends walk all over you.”you.”

Tip #7 When it comes to friendships stop Tip #7 When it comes to friendships stop competing and comparing, and start competing and comparing, and start thinking win-winthinking win-win

How Come You Don’t Kick How Come You Don’t Kick With Us No More?With Us No More?

You and Your friends changeYou and Your friends change There’s a big difference between There’s a big difference between

abandoning your friends and developing abandoning your friends and developing new friends because your interests have new friends because your interests have changedchanged

Tip #8: Remember, you and your friends Tip #8: Remember, you and your friends may change and pursue different may change and pursue different interests and that’s okayinterests and that’s okay. .

Making and Being A Making and Being A FriendFriend

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Making and Being A Making and Being A FriendFriend Be Slow To JudgeBe Slow To Judge

Most people cut themselves Most people cut themselves off from a lot of potential off from a lot of potential friends because they are friends because they are quick to judge.quick to judge.

Discussion:Discussion: How have you been judged How have you been judged

by others?by others? Have you ever unfairly Have you ever unfairly

judged someone else?judged someone else?

You Make The EffortYou Make The Effort

Everybody wants to belong to something Everybody wants to belong to something bigger than themselves.bigger than themselves.

Proactive people Proactive people makemake friends. friends. Reactive people wait around for Reactive people wait around for

someone to make friends with them.someone to make friends with them.

Build your Build your RBA: RBA: Relationship Bank AccountRelationship Bank Account DepositsDeposits

Do Small Acts of Do Small Acts of KindnessKindness

Say you’re sorrySay you’re sorry Be LoyalBe Loyal Keep PromisesKeep Promises

ListenListen

WithdrawalsWithdrawals Do little mean thingsDo little mean things Be too proud to Be too proud to

apologizeapologize Gossip and talk Gossip and talk

behind people’s behind people’s backsbacks

Breaks promisesBreaks promises Talk too muchTalk too much

Make Yourself More Make Yourself More LikeableLikeable

You can’t make people You can’t make people like you, but you like you, but you cancan make yourself more make yourself more likeable.likeable.

Focus on things you can Focus on things you can control, let go of things control, let go of things you can’t control.you can’t control.

People are AnnoyingPeople are Annoying Get in your assigned group.Get in your assigned group. Have one student take out a piece of Have one student take out a piece of

paper, write everyone’s names on it, and paper, write everyone’s names on it, and label it “People are Annoying”.label it “People are Annoying”.

As a group, make a list of things that As a group, make a list of things that others have done that make you not want others have done that make you not want to be their friend.to be their friend.

Do not use anyone’s real name.Do not use anyone’s real name.

ReflectionReflection

As each group shares their list of how As each group shares their list of how people can be annoying, think about people can be annoying, think about whether or not any of these behaviors whether or not any of these behaviors apply to you.apply to you.

Ask yourself: Ask yourself: Am I someone that I’d like Am I someone that I’d like to be friends with?to be friends with?

Be InclusiveBe Inclusive

Being inclusive means you make the Being inclusive means you make the effort to open up yourself and your group effort to open up yourself and your group to outsiders. to outsiders. This shows your true This shows your true charactercharacter!!

Treat Unkindness With Treat Unkindness With KindnessKindness

Instead of fighting back, be kind to your Instead of fighting back, be kind to your enemies, and they will either leave you enemies, and they will either leave you alone or become friends.alone or become friends.

"Am I not destroying my enemies when I "Am I not destroying my enemies when I make friends of them?"make friends of them?"

-Abraham Lincoln-Abraham Lincoln

Lift OthersLift Others

1) Find friends who build you up1) Find friends who build you up

2) Be the friend who builds people up2) Be the friend who builds people up

The best way to find out if you have good The best way to find out if you have good friends is to ask yourself… friends is to ask yourself…

““Am I a better person when I am Am I a better person when I am around my friends?”around my friends?”

Group DiscussionGroup Discussion

What are some ways your friends make What are some ways your friends make you a better person?you a better person?

What are some ways your friends make What are some ways your friends make you a worse person?you a worse person?

Peer PressurePeer Pressure

What situations do your parents prepare What situations do your parents prepare you for? What are some situations you you for? What are some situations you think your parents don’t want to talk to think your parents don’t want to talk to you about?you about?

Winning The Daily Private Winning The Daily Private VictoryVictory

GET IN TOUCH with yourself through writing in GET IN TOUCH with yourself through writing in your journal, reading inspiring literature, your journal, reading inspiring literature, praying, meditating, or doing whatever inspires praying, meditating, or doing whatever inspires you and increases your self-awarenessyou and increases your self-awareness

REVIEW your goals, ambitions, or mission REVIEW your goals, ambitions, or mission statementstatement

VISUALIZE the challenges you will face in the VISUALIZE the challenges you will face in the upcoming day. Decide now how you will upcoming day. Decide now how you will handle them.handle them.

Peer Pressure ShieldPeer Pressure Shield Strong Support SystemStrong Support System

– surround yourself with – surround yourself with people who make you people who make you your best!your best!

Courage In The Moment Courage In The Moment - you should make a - you should make a plan to stand up against plan to stand up against peer pressure, but you peer pressure, but you still need to be brave still need to be brave when faced with a when faced with a decision.decision.

It’s time to make new It’s time to make new friends if…friends if…

You have to change your clothes, You have to change your clothes, language, friends, or standards in order language, friends, or standards in order to keep your friendsto keep your friends

You’re doing stuff you don’t feel good You’re doing stuff you don’t feel good about, like stealing, fighting, or doing about, like stealing, fighting, or doing drugs.drugs.

You feel like you’re being used.You feel like you’re being used. Your life feels out of control. Your life feels out of control.