friedrich durrenmia - dramatic publishing company...personal scene 1: stage l-lands: wild sow....

..FRIEDRICH DURRENMIATT'5

Hercules and the Augean Stables

Translated by Agnes Hamilton

THE DRAMATIC PUBLISHI]~G·COMPANY

© The Dramatic Publishing Company, Woodstock, Illinois

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(HERCULES AND THE AUGEAN STABLES)


HEROJLES AND lHE AUGEAl\l STABLES

A Full- Length Play

For Nineteen Men and Two Women*

CHARACTERS

HERCULES. the National HeraoDEIANIRA . .. • .. his mistressPOL YBIUS his s ecre taryAUGEAS president of ELisPHYLEUS . • .. " " .. • • his sonrOLE . • .. . his daughte:taLICHAS .. .. . . a pas tmanCAMBYSES • a servantTANTALUS.. . " ". .. a air-cuB directopTEN MEMBERS of the ELEAN NATI10NAL

ASSEMBLYTW0 STAGE HANDS

Place:

Time:

Ancient Greece.

TIle Heroic Age.

*Some of the ten members of the National Assemblymay be women, if a more balanced east is desired..

3


Scene 1:

Scene 2:Scene 3:Scene 4:

Scene 5:

Scene 6:Scene 7:Scene 8:Scene 9:Scene 10:Scene 11:Scene 12:Scene 13:

Scene 14:

PROPERTIES

GENERAL

Dung~ which continually increases dur-ing the course of the play.Rostrum (also in Scenes 2, 6, 8, 10, 11,13, and 14).White curtains on rostnlm (also in Scene2).Facade of a classical Tbeban house (alsoin Scene 5).Full moon (also in Scenes 8, 11).Snow, wild sow.None.Rope with cow- bell attached. (Also inScene 12).Parcel offs tage for Lichas; grave 0 fPhyleus (a mound topped with abatteredGreek helmet and a blood- stained gar-ment with torn wedding ribbons on it)~pitcher of wine behind facade of house.Couch.Same as Scene 3.Three tents.Pitchfork.Soup plates, ladles and other utensils.Same as Scene 8.Same as Scene 4.Circus backdrop~ theatre- type box withseats.Frame only of main tent; heap of rags;fire; bucket, ladle) and several soup-plates; Deianira's bowl of black blood.

75


PERSONAL

Scene 1:STAGE l-lANDS: Wild sow.HERCULES: Bow and arrows, club.

Scene 2:Same as Scene 1.

Scene 3:POL YBrus: Sling for arm, icicle.DEIANIRA: Large bowl of black blood.AUGEAS: Egg.

Scene 4:None.

Scene 5:LICHAS: Letter.STAGE HANDS: Stretcher, body.POL YBIUS: Bandage, crutch.

Scene 6:DEIA]~IRA: Hercules' lion skin, brush.

Scene 7:HERCULES and POLYBIUS: Sedan chair.

Scene 8:PHYLEUS: Pair of boots.

Scene 9:STAGE HANDS: Stretcher, body.AUGEAS: Milking stool, bucket.CAMBYSES~ Milking stool, bucket, container

of grease.Scene 10:

HERCULJES: Large bowl of beans and meat..POLYBIUS: Two crutches, bandages.

Scene 11:None.

76


Scene 12:None.

Scene 13:STAGE HANDSNATIONAL ASSEMBLYCAMBYSES

huge weight.

TANTALUS: whip, laurel wreath, brandyflask, money in wallet.

Scene 14:PHYLEUS: Greek helmet) sword, wedding

ribbons on tunic.

77


Some may see this playas beingvery realistic -' others may wantto do it completely differently.Therefore stage directions forthe play are left to the'discretionof the director, as are stage de-sign and the use of properties andcostumes.

4


Sc~n~ I

PROLOGUE

(TIle stage is empty)

POL YBIOS (addressing the audience). Ladies andgentlemen, that our bare boards shouldrepresent the world may well surprise you,and our only excuse is that there is no otherway theatrically. We are trying to tell astory which no one has dared put on thestage before, because it deals, if I may putit like this, with man's zeal for cleanlinessat war with his quest for art4 We only em-bark upon the precarious task of creatingsuch a tarnished world because we believethat any difficulty can be overcome in thetheatre. Well, almost any_ It might not havecoped with some of the deeds of our nationalhero; for instance, what about the two ser-pents which twined 'round his neck whilst hewas still in his cradle and which het a mereinfant, without more ado" " " (He makes astrangling gesture.) Or again, the scenewhen the mighty infant sucked with such!orce at the breast of the goddess Hera thata spurt of divine milk flew across the sky.A cosmic event to which we owe the MilkyWay. Where woulq.< we find the snakes?Where the infant? And where indeed thebreast? But to come to the point. The pre-historic landscape, which you see here, islittered with cow dung; that legendary com-post, to use a more horticultural term, is

5


Hercules & the Augean Stables Scene 1

none other than the antique dung) which hasbeen accumulating for centuries in Elis,overrunnin.g its frontiers, bursting its con-fines, overflowing everywherea However,it may console you to know that if we offerdung) it is at least famous dung. Themanagement have also gone to the troubleto supply a rostrum, complete with curtain)for such scenes as take place in less dirtysurroundings. Here it is. (A rostrum witha white curtain rolls onto the stage throughthe dung .. )

TIle scenery will float down from above. Forexample) 'this facade of a house in TIlebes,which will soon be required.

(The facade is lowered from "the flies'· andthen HtlownH again. )

Or the full moon--our natural Satellite. (Afull moon appears UL and then disappearsagain. )

There can be no art wi thou! romance, noromance, v/ithout love) and no love withoutmoonlight. Weare not going to show you arealistic play; we are not going to presenta play with a moral; and we are going togive the theatre of the absurd a miss foronce. What we have to offer is a poetic play.Even if the subj ect is somewhat down to earth,poetry will transcend it.. Other props willbe brought onto the stage by two stage hands;this worn-out sow, for il!Stance.


Scene 1 Hercules & the Augean ~tables Page 7

(Two stage hands, panting heavily, drag a wild sowonto the rostrum. They arrange the cur-tain to look like an icicle and then go OUt. )

POL YBIUS. Unfortunately we can't do without thisbeast. You may have noticed that the stage-hands are wearing boots; this is becauseof the state of the ground. Ladies andgentlemen, wetr~ almost ready to begin.However, I would not like the play to beginwithout first introducing myself. I amGreek. My name is Polybius afld I am anative from Samos. I am private secretar~to our national hero. But even the meanest,most downtrodden creature- - and I choosethe words deliberately- -will have his dayone day after centuries-··af vvraiting> centur-ies which I am temp-ted to call barren whenviewed in the perspective of history. Andso I will speak and disclose what I know. Wetoo yearned for a place in the sun, we toohoped for a dignified human existence. Andwhere did it get us? Just look at the stage.(He indicates the dung. ) But enough. Mymaster is coming to hang up bis how onone of those icicles and to take his place onthe rostrum.

(HERClTLES enters from stage R, dressed in a lionskin, carrying a bow and a club.. He sitsdown on the rostrum next to the wild sow .. )

POLYBIUS (continuing). We are going to tell youabout Hercules and the Augean stables.. Thefifth labor of our national hero.. We begin,however, with the end of the fourth~ Snow;9, 572 feet above sea level. Ladies and


Hercules & the Augean Stables

gentlemen, at last we can begin.

.scene 2

Scene 1

THE GLACIAL SL1MMIT OF MOlTNT OLYNIPUS

HERCULES (sitting next to the wild sow., bothcovered in snow). It's cold.

POLYBIUS. It is.HERCULES. The air's thin.POLYBIUS. It's high up. (POL YBIUS blows in his

hands, hugs himself, stamps his feet, any-thing to keep warm. )

HERCULES. Sit down. You get on my nerves,dancing about like that.

POLYBIUS. Sorry. (He climbs onto the rostrumand sits on the left of the wild sow. Silence.TIley shiver. )

HERCULES. North wind.POLYBIUS (licking his index finger and holding it

up). Northwest.HERCULES. It's a good thing Itve got my lion

skin.POLYBIUS. You·re lucky. Itm wearing summer

clothes.HERCULES" The fog is getting worse.POL YBIUS. TI1ere's a storm brewing.HERCULES. Greeks and glaciers don't go to-

gether. (1llunder.)POLYBIUS. An avalanche.HERCULES. WeIre not an Alpine race.POLYBIDS. All tlle more reason to congratulate

ourselves on being the first to climb MountOlympus.


Scene 2 Hercules & the Augean Stables Page 9

HERCULES. The wild boar was first. (Thunder.)POL YBIUS. Falling rocks.HERCULES. Half the summit is sliding down.POL YBIUS. Do you think Olympus is a solid sort

of mountain?HERCULES. No idea. (Silence~ Snowstorm.)

Polybius~

POLYBIUS. Yes.HERCULES~ Stop chattering your teeth.POLYBIUS. Sorry.HERCULES. I can t t help thinking. . .POLYBIUS. It's the cold.HERCULES. I wear myself out slaying prehistoric

monsters which ruin the crops and runningthrough bandits which terrorize the high-ways; and yet, ever since I've employed you,my correspondence is in hand but my en-gagements have fallen off. ~

POLYBIUS. True. The first three I negotiateddidn't bring in much. It's a pity the Nemeanlion, where the fee was to equal the anim.altsweight, turned out to be a Balkan miniature.Then the Lernaean hydra sank in the Lernaeanmarshes and the Ceryneian hind disappearedaltogether. But now we've got the Eryman-thian boar. What a chasel Right to the topof the sacred mountain, never seen by mor-tal eye before.

HERCULES. Wetre not seeing much of it, either.POLYBIUS. But we've managed to corner the fear-

ful boar.HERCULES. If 8 still snowing.POLYBIUS. The world can breathe again [HERCULES. That doesn't help us.POLYBlUS. It helps us a lo~. TIle Erymanthian

boar is stretched out between us in the snow;and where the boar lies, there lies the fee.



HERCULES. That's not the Erymanthian boar!That's some flaked-out old sow.

POLYBIUS (scrutinizing it)~ So it is. (Pause.) Shemust have been following the boar.

HERCULES. Like us.POLYBIUS. We must keep our heads. (Thunder.)HERCULES. Another avalanche.POLYBIUS. If the sow is here, the boar can't be

far away-.HERCULES. Over -there, in the ravine.POLYBIUS. What? In the ravine?HERCULES. TIle "Eryrnanthian boar fell into the

ravine before my eyes.POLYBIUS.. And with it our fee~ Fifteen thousand

drachmae lie buried down there ..HERCULES. Three thousand more than I got for a

common bandit. (Pause.)POLYBIUS. Couldn't we get the boar out of the

ravine?HERCULES. Too steep. (Pause.)POLYBIUS.. Wetll have to think of something.HERCULES. The old sowts already stiff. (Pause.)POLYBIUS. I've got itrHERCULES. VleU?POLYBIUS. I know a taxidermist in Thebes. Now

if he could make the odd improvement. .. .HERCULES. Vlhat for?POL YBIUS.. To turn the sow into a boar.. After all,

one wild boar's like another. (Pause.)HERCULES. It's stopped snowing.POL YBIUS. TIle fog IS lifting...HERCULES. Letts stretch ourselves. (They get

up, shaking off the snow.. ) Now for ourexerciSe~.. (They touch their toes andswing their arms above their heads.) NowI can think clearly again ..

POLYBIUS. Thank goodness for that.



HERCULES. So you want to turn me into a charla-tan.

POL YBIUS (nervously). But ...HERCULES. 1f m to pass a sow off as a boar.POL YBIUS. Just for the fee. Think of it. Fifteen

thousand drachmae.HERCULES. To hell with the money.POLYBIUS. You cantt afford to throwaway money

like that. Not with your debts. (Pause.HERCULES looks at POLYBIUS, aghast.)

HERCULES. Enough!POLYBIUS. Sorry.HERCULES (raging). We are on the summit of

Mount Olympus. (Thunder.)POL YBIUS. Another avalanche.HERCULES (shouting). I don't care. (Thunder.)POL YBIDS. And another. (Pause.) If you go on

shouting, the rest of the summit will col-lapse.

HERCULES (furiously). I feel like throwing youdown there. I haventt any debts.

POLYBIUS. And how!HERCULES (taking hold of him). Liar!POLYBIUS (terrified)~ I am not. Youfve got debts

everywhere. With the bank, the OfficialReceiver, your architect) your tailor} infact, with everyone in Thebes .... (Dark-ness. Rumbling. Silence. )


Hercules & the Augean Stables

Scene 3

IN FRONT OF THE ROSTRUM

Scene 3

(POLYBIUS enters limping from behind the rostrum,rubbing his backside, his arm in a sling. )

POLYBIOS (slightly out of breath). His outburstswere world-famous. Indeed, still are .. Hethrew both the sow and me o-ff. the glacierinto the ""Dads at the foot of Olympus. Andthen came tumbling after, together with therest of the summit. (He plucks an iciclefrom the back of his neck). Look. Anicicle. (He throws it into the orchestrapita) Luckily, the mountainous rocksthundered past me. But Hercules. fell righton top of mea Of the three of us he had themost comfortable landing, with nothing toshow for it. I was sandwiched between himand the sow. No matter.. The only thingthat stops me handing in my notice is thedifficulty of getting a job without a diploma.I had trouble with the examiners in Athensas well.:as til Rhodes. Hercules also hap-pens to owe me two months' wages. How-ever~ even~ the worst of his rages are calmed _by the voice of. . .

DEIANIRA (offstage, calling) a Hercules.

POLYBIOS. Deiapira, his misttess6 She is sobeautiful ana intelligent that no praise is toogood for her ..



(HERCULES peers through the rostrum curtain. )

HERCULES. Did you hear her golden voice, Poly-bius? Its caressing tone? Isn't she wonder-ful? What a figure! What a walkr What blisswhen she laughs, when she sings, dances orrecites and calls my name. (He disappearsbehind the curtain again. )

POLYBIUS" They are a perfect match. Herculesis strong, brave and uncomplicated. Sheis delicate and subtle. It is for her he un-dertakes his labors. And he has dedicatedhimself to the purification of Greece sothat it may be worthy of her. Deianira, onthe other hand, is uneasy in her mind. In-deed, she once said to me" ..

(DEIANIRA enters stage R) carrying a large bowl" )

DEIANIRA. I know that Hercules and I are con-sidered to be the ideal couple in Greece ..We love each other very much. But eversince I've had the bowl of black blood Idread the thought of marrying him.

POLYBIUS. The bowl of black blood? (DEIANIRAsits on the edge of the rosrrum with her bowlof blood.)

DEIANIRA. When we arrived at the river Evenus,the centaur Nessus tried to seduce me. Her-cules shot him with a poisoned arrow. Thedying centaur told me to preserve his bloodin this bowl" It would serve to keep Hercu-les faithful if I dipped his shirt in the blood.I haven't done so yet" He hates shirts. Nor-mally he goes about naked, unless he iswearing his lion skin. At present we arestill free. But one day we shall be married,



and then Kshall dread losing him. He willstart wearing a shirt because he is olderand feels the cold more. Then the day willcome when I shall dip his shirt in the blackblood of the centaur. (DEIANIRA slowlyexits right with her bowl).

POLYBIUS. So much for Deianira. Now for KingAugeas, whose invitation was the turningpoint in th~ life of this noble pair. Let himspeak for himself.. (POLYBIUS goes out L. )

(AUGEAS enters UL. He is wearing boots. Heglances at the rostrum, then steps forward .. )

AUGEAS. First a few remarks about Elis. Sit-uated in Greece, just below the 38th paral-lel, level with Sicily; to be exact) in thewestern part of the Peloponnesus) borderedon the north and south by the rivers Peneusand A.lpheus; on the west by the Ionic Seaand on the east by Arcadia, an inhospitablestrip of land quite unworthy of its reputa-tion. Soil: well manured.. Beneath the sur-face apparently some molasses and belowthat some gneiss may even be found.. Theclimate, apart from the constant rain,temperate--like our morals. The win-ters tend, unfortunately, to be somewhatraw, and the warm wind from the hillsbreeds inertia. Hence the proverb, "asdopey as an Elean. " The capital too iscalled Elis. Our cattle number approxi-mately eight hundred thousand and our pigssome six hundred thousand. We havesimply millions of hens. 11leir eg-gs--(Hesearches in his pockets, finds an egg andholds it up. )- - are exceptionally large,



nourishing and tasty.. Population: sometwo hundred thousand all told. Religion:moderate Dionysian tempered with ortho-dox Apollonarian, which was the originalsect. Politics: liberal patriarchal, vacil-lating between Athenian den10cracy, Spar-tan autocracy and Persian colonialism. Idon't want to wa.ste time on myself. To behonest I am not really king, merely presi-dent. Actually, just the richest peasant.And since there are only peasants I havethe say and so preside over parliament.Regarding my private life, suffice it thatI am a widower with two children. May 1present ...

(Enter PHYLEUS and IOLE from UL and UR re-spectively. PHYLEUS bows a littlegauchely. IOLE cunsies. Both are ratherdirty. }

AUGEAS (continuing). . . . Phyleus, my son, aneighteen-year-old lout; and Iole, my littlegirl, just fourteen. Now you t\V"O, hop it.(The children leave.) So n1uch for my pri-vate life. Now about the legendary dung.This has become the subject of a heateddebate in the national assembly. Let usmove the rostrum and we shall find our-selves in the ancient and time- honored townhall of the Elean peasant republic. (Therostrum is pushed back and disappears.AUGEAS is a trifle embarrassed.) Perhapsa little confession would not be inappro-priate. Since the town hall has long sincebeen submerged under the by-products of



our rural economy, the national assemblynow meets in my stable.


friedrich durrenmia - dramatic publishing company...personal scene 1: stage l-lands: wild sow....

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