Founded in 1949 The Newspaper of Imperial College Union

Police ignore IC

after trophies stolen O N T H E 22nd August , F E L I X reported that £ 5 0 0 0 worth of trophies h a d been stolen from t h e I C U n i o n O f f i c e . T h e t r o p h i e s h a v e n o t yet b e e n recovered a n d the police seem to have made little progress.

T h e theft took p lace in the early morning of Tuesday 29th J u l y between two o'clock, when Beit security made their patrol and the time the cleaners opened the office. A window was broken in the Honorary Secretary's Office to gain entry and then the rather inadequate trophy cabinet lock was snapped off.

A n unfortunate aspect of the robbery is that it should never have occurred. M a l c o l m Brain, while he was Deputy President, wrote to the Estates section of College on 31st October and 3rd D e c e m b e r , 1979, a s k i n g for an estimate for an alarm system and better locks for the U n i o n Office. Rachel Snee (present DP) received the reply on 9th J u l y 1980, just three weeks before the trophies were stolen.

Even though the trophies are i n s u r e d for £ 5 , 0 0 0 , a n d are of doubtless h i s t o r i c a l v a l u e , the worth of them when melted down is negligible, as most of the cups were only silver-plated or pewter. Three solid silver cups were left behind! These factors have led College Security to believe that the robbery was the result of a 'grudge' against the U n i o n , by, perhaps an ex-student who knew the layout of the U n i o n Office. They have even gone so far as to put f o r w a r d a suspect to the pol ice : an ex-s tudent who has b e e n c o n v i c t e d o f theft a n d vandalism in the College several times in the past.

Continued on p3

ENTS GIG VETOED T H E New Musik concert a r r a n ­g e d b y I C E n t e r t a i n m e n t s C o m m i t t e e for N o v e m b e r 23 has had to be cancel led because College Block have w i t h d r a w n the use of the G r e a t H a l l . New Musik, despite a successful a lbum and several popular singles, agreed at the end of August to play a gig at I C for half their normal fee, provided the booking was for a Sunday. E N T S agreed and arranged a provisional booking of the Great H a l l . O n attempting to confirm the booking, they were told that C a p t a i n L i n d l e y , the College Domestic Secretary, had vetoed the decision.

Captain Lindley , when asked, stated that the gig could not go ahead as it was on a Sunday. This meant, he said, that there would would be problems over security, c o m p l a i n t s from l o c a l residents a b o u t d r u n k e n r o w d i e s o n a S u n d a y night , a lot of people would have to give up free time to supervise the concert, and if the Great H a l l were to be required on M o n d a y morning the cleaners wouldn't come in to set up for it.

M i k e F i r m s t o n . the E N T S C h a i r m a n , brought up the follow­ing salient points:

i) "Security are prepared to do Sunday concerts provided they are not punk bands" .

ii) " M o s t people come to the gigs by tube to South Kensington, a n d t h e n o v e r the w a l k w a y , w h i c h e f f e c t s f e w r e s i d e n t s ; f u r t h e r m o r e no d r u n k w i l l be allowed in the Great H a l l and the U n i o n Bar is the nearest source of a l c o h o l (a q u a r t e r o f a m i l e away) " .

iii) " T h e r e is no difference between giving up time to supervise a c o n c e r t o n a S u n d a y , a n d g i v i n g u p t i m e to s u p e r v i s e a concert on a Saturday" .

vi) " E N T S iias to c lear up alter a concert, in fact, alter last year 's J o h n M i l e s c o n c e r t . M i -Thomas, the Domestic Manager wrote to E N T S to congratulate t h e m o n their tidiness. I n any case , no one h a d b o o k e d the Great H a l l lor M o n d a v morning.

A p p a r e n t l y C a p t a i n L i n d l e y was very w o r r i e d about G r e a t H a l l concerts after all the corres­pondence about a Jack T h e L a d gig some years ago, though since then several Sunday concerts have gone off without a hitch; further­more, E N T S booking for C a r a v a n on Sunday 16th November will take place (College claim that this was passed 'by mistake'). E N T S need Sunday concerts as this is a useful way of booking bands at cheaper rates, and also tends to draw a larger audience.

F o r t u n a t e l y for E N T S , they have not been asked to pay a cancellation fee, but it is another unfortunate set back for them. " A similar situation occurred in 1977 when E N T S had to cancel Great

H a l l gigs due to the G L C enforcing extra safety arrangements. That dispute was best summed up by the then E N T S C h a i r m a n , T i m Fowler's, comment: " W e seem to be the only venue of under 2,000 capacity where the G L C is exerting its pressure. T r a v e l to the R o u n d ­house, the Marquee , the Nashville, or any similarly sized concert hall, and look to see if they have got a four foot barrier in front of the s t a g e . A n d few o f the o t h e r regulations come near to being satisfied at these examples" .

This autumn's situation is best summed up by M i k e Firmston's opinion ol College block's attitude. " T h e r e are no Sunday concerts, b e c a u s e t h e r e are no S u n d a y concerts" .

Bloody great holes in the skirting board!

No. 560 Monday. September 29,1980

L e t t e r s , a n d i n d e e d a l l c o p y for F E L I X , s h o u l d be n e a t l y w r i t t e n a n d d o u b l e s p a c e d . N a m e s a n d d e p t . must a c c o m p a n y a l l letters o therwise they h a v e n ' t got a cat in hells c h a n c e o f e n d i n g u p i n p r i n t . H o w e v e r , these detai l s w i l l be w i t h e l d o r a p e n n a m e subst i tuted i f r e q u i r e d .

C o r r e s p o n d a n c e is i n v i t e d o n a l l topics ; there w i l l be n o c e n s o r s h i p b u t the e d i t o r reserves the r i g h t to c h o p u p letters to m a k e t h e m fit ( a n d still r e t a i n i n g the o r i g i n a l m e a n i n g ) .

Sir,

H a v i n g r e c e n t l y b e e n a r e c i p i e n t o f t h e s o - c a l l e d " R C S H a n d b o o k " I w a s a p p a l l e d t o see t o w h a t d e p t h s t h i s f o r m e r l y i l l u s t r i o u s p u b l i c a t i o n h a s s u n k . A r e w e r e a l l y t o b e l i e v e t h a t a l l t h e R C S O f f i c e r s a r e i m b e c i l e s a n d s e x u a l d e v i a n t s w h o s e r v e n o b e t t e r p u r p o s e t h a n t o c o n t i n u e a n o u t m o d e d a n d d e c r e p i t t r a d i t i o n for a n o t h e r y e a r ? T h i s is c e r t a i n l y t h e i m p r e s s i o n I get .

D o e s t h i s a p p a l l i n g M a r k S m i t h p e r s o n b e l i e v e h e c a n t a m p e r w i t h R C S a n d n o t g e t h i m s e l f i n t o c o n s i d e r a b l e b o t h e r ? D o e s h e s u p p o s e he is a b o v e t h e u n w r i t t e n l a w ?

A c u r s o r y g l a n c e t h r o u g h t h i s r a g l e f t o n e w i t h t h e d i s t i n c t i m p r e s s i o n t h a t a l l t h e a r t i c l e s w e r e p e n n e d b y t h e s a m e p e r s o n w r i t i n g u n d e r d i f f e r e n t p s e u d o n y m s A m I f a r w i d e o f t h e m a r k , w h e n I s u p p o s e t h a t M r S m i t h h i m s e l f is r e s p o n s i b l e f o r t h e h o r r i b l e s l u r s i n t h e c h a r a c t e r s o f t h e p e o p l e w h o h a v e g i v e n u p t h e i r s p a r e t i m e to b e R C S U O f f i c e r s ? O r p e r h a p s o n e o r s o m e o f his c r o n i e s " c r e a t e d " t h e i n s i d i o u s p r o f i l e s u n d e r th is " E d i t o r ' s " d i r e c t i o n .

T h a t t h e s t a l w a r t s o f o n e o f o u r c o l l e g e ' s s t u d e n t u n i o n s s h o u l d b e so s t a b b e d i n t h e b a c k , fills m e w i t h h a t r e d a n d l o a t h i n g . I t h i n k a l i f e s i z e p i c t u r e o f M r S m i t h s h o u l d b e p i n n e d to t h e w a l l of t h e R C S O f f i c e a n d e v e r y o n e

e n t e r i n g t h e r e i n s h o u l d be o b l i g e d to t h r o w d a r t s a t it . C a n h e n o t b e o s t r a c i s e d b y R C S U ?

I f I w e r e R i c h a r d A r c h e r I w o u l d c o m e d o w n e x t r e m e l y h e a v i l y o n t h i s a b o m i n a b l e p e r s o n . Is " M o t i o n o f C e n s u r e " t o o ' s t r o n g a p h r a s e to use? I c a n t h i n k o f at least t w e n t y - t w o g o o d r e a s o n s w h y t h e m o s t h e a v y p e n a l t i e s s h o u l d b e b r o u g h t t o b e a r , b u t it w o u l d be t o o t e d i o u s to list t h e m h e r e . S o I s h a l l r e f r a i n

I h o p e m y w o r d s d o n o t g o u n h e e d e d for this is i n d e e d a s a d d a y for us a l l .

Tours sincerely,

D.P.

Dear Steve

T h a n k s v e r y m u c h for t h e c o p y o f F E L I X , I l o v e t h e m a s t h e a d — I o n l y w i s h w e c o u l d a f f o r d f o u r c o l o u r s . . . .

A few p o i n t s o n y o u r p i e c e o n London Student. F i r s t l y , I d o u b t it Sennet e v e n i n t h e h a l c y o n d a y s o f 1971 h a d a c i r c u l a t i o n o f 100 ,000 . It 's m o r e l i k e l y t h a t t h e y w e r e d i s t r i b u t i n g 2 0 , 0 0 0 a n d c l a i m i n g a r e a d e r s h i p of f ive s t u d e n t s to e a c h p a p e r .

S e c o n d l y , I m p e r i a l has i n fact s u b s c r i b e d to London Student for t w o h u n d r e d c o p i e s a w e e k , n o t t h r e e h u n d r e d .

T h i r d l y , I w o u l d c h e c k a b i t b e f o r e c l a i m i n g t h e l a r g e s t c i r c u ­l a t i o n i f ( a n d I d o n ' t t h i n k it w i l l ) London Student f o l d s . P C L ' s McGarel

C i t y P o l y ' s Pepys a n d U n i v e r s i t y C o l l e g e ' s Pi a l l s p r i n g to m i n d as h a v i n g a b o u t t h e s a m e c i r c u l a t i o n as F E L I X .

B a c k to F E L I X , I l i k e t h e F i s h y T a l e s c o l u m n (are y o u g o i n g to d e s c r i b e t h e c o l o u r s c h e m e o f y o u r of f ice i n it?) , b u t h a v e n o i d e a w h a t P G T i p s is s u p p o s e d to b e a b o u t . . . .

H o p e y o u h a v e n i c e h o l i d a y .

Best wishes

Paul Segal

Editor of London Student

Dear Paul, T h a n k s for y o u r letter. I d o n ' t l ike y o u r m a s t h e a d in the

slightest a n d I w i s h I c o u l d afford four c o l o u r s too.

A few p o i n t s o n y o u r letter i n F E L I X . I n m y o r i g i n a l a r t i c l e , I s a i d that S e n n e t h a d c l a i m e d a c i r c u l a t i o n o f 100,000 p e r week in 1974. T h e y w o r k e d out that after p r i n t i n g 40,000, e a c h c o p y was r e a d by 2.5 p e o p l e . T h i s c a u s e d the edi tors o f o t h e r L o n d o n s tudent n e w s p a p e r s to at tack Sennet for d i v e r t i n g a d v e r t i s i n g r e v e n u e a w a y f r o m t h e m b y this l u d i c r o u s c i r c u l a t i o n figure. In r e p l y , Sennet's a d v e r t i s i n g m a n a g e r is o n r e c o r d as s a y i n g : " Y o u ' r e b e i n g too h o n e s t " a n d " Y o u a r e a p p r o a c h i n g a d v e r t i s i n g too fair ly a n d s q u a r e l y . "

I c o n c e d e y o u r s e c o n d p o i n t b u t h o p e that y o u are not g o i n g to c l a i m a r e a d e r s h i p o f 4 ,500 at I C , i.e. 22.5 p e o p l e p e r c o p y .

T h i r d l y , I w o u l d h a v e t h o u g h t y o u w e r e n ' t c o r r e c t . F o r instance , Pi spr ings to m i n d as not b e i n g a w e e k l y n e w s p a p e r .

Best wishes, Steve Marshall

Editor of FELIX

Sir,

I n y o u r l a s t i s s u e ( 5 5 9 ) t h e a r t i c l e f r o m J o h n W h i t e h o u s e ( P G G r o u p C h a i r m a n ) c o m p l a i n e d a b o u t t h e g r a n t r e c e i v e d b y P G G r o u p f r o m t h e U n i o n — s u p p o ­s e d l y . 3 0 p f r o m a £ 3 9 c a p i t a t i o n fee. M r W h i t e h o u s e seems to h a v e o v e r l o o k e d t h e f a c t t h a t t h e P o s t g r a d u a t e G r o u p g e t s t h i s g r a n t o v e r a n d a b o v e t h e o t h e r f a c i l i t i e s t h a t t h e U n i o n p r o v i d e s . T h e £ 3 9 c a p i t a t i o n fee p a i d to t h e U n i o n goes to p r o v i d i n g f a c i l i t i e s for s p o r t s , c l u b s a n d societ ies , for C C U s , for F E L I X a n d for t h e m a n y o t h e r w i d e a n d v a r i e d b i t s a n d p ieces .

A l s o for t h e n u m b e r o f p e o p l e w h o a c t u a l l y p a r t i c i p a t e i n t h e P G G r o u p , e n t h u s i a s t i c as t h e y m a y be , I w o u l d say t h a t t h o s e few get m u c h m o r e t h a n t h e 3 0 p s u g g e s t e d .

I w o u l d t h e r e f o r e l i k e to i n v i t e M r W h i t e h o u s e a n d t h e m a n y u n i n v o l v e d P C s to set t h e i r o w n h o u s e i n o r d e r b e f o r e t h e y s tart g r i p i n g a b o u t t h e i r g r a n t . T h e a l t e r n a t i v e s a r e : i) to get r i d o f t h e P G G r o u p a l t o g e t h e r o r ii) to set u p a n u n d e r g r a d u a t e g r o u p (?)•

J Passmore

W h i l e y o u w e r e

a w a y

Thief in Sherfield M r J o h n S m i t h , t h e C o l l e g e S e c r e t a r y , a r r e s t e d a t h i e f i n his of f ice o n 21st A u g u s t .

T h e th ie f w a s o b s e r v e d l e a v i n g w i t h M r S m i t h ' s w a l l e t s t i c k i n g o u t o f h i s t r o u s e r s .

T h e case h a s n o w b e e n h e a r d i n c o u r t a n d t h e t h i e f h a s b e e n i m p r i s o n e d for six m o n t h s .

Round at the Queens O n 1 7 t h J u l y , s u c h b i g k n o b s as C h r i s F o x , S e a n O ' B o y l e , a n d J o A r m i t a g e t o g e t h e r w i t h o t h e r a s s o r t e d g u e s t s w e n t o f f t o a B u c k i n g h a m P a l a c e G a r d e n P a r t y i n t h e m o t o r i s e d m a s c o t s J e z a n d B o . A g o o d t i m e w a s h a d b y a l l !

Comings and Goings A t t h e b e g i n n i n g of A u g u s t , M r G e o f f r e y R e e v e s t o o k o v e r t h e post o f C h i e f S e c u r i t y O f f i c e r a f ter t h e d e a t h o f M r D a w s o n l a s t t e r m . M r R e e v e s is a f o r m e r S c o t l a n d Y a r d C h i e f S u p e r i n ­t e n d e n t w h o s e s o n s t u d i e d a t G u i l d s .

M r J o h n S a m w o r t h , t h e B o o k ­s h o p M a n a g e r , h a s n o w r e t i r e d . A n e w m a n a g e r w i l l n o t b e a p p o i n t e d ; t h e B o o k s h o p w i l l r u n itself w i t h t h e a i d o f a s m a l l c o m p u t e r .

Last Post F i n a l l y , w h e n y o u g o to p o s t y o u r l e t t e r b y t h e R C M y o u w i l l b e s u r p r i s e d to see t h a t t h e p o s t b o x has b e e n r e m o v e d . O v e r t h e r o a d y o u w i l l see o n e of t h e v e r y first o f t h e G P O ' s r e v o l u t i o n a r y n e w ' K -t y p e ' p i l l a r b o x . T h e P o s t O f f i c e i n t e n d s , o v e r a p e r i o d o f y e a r s , to r e p l a c e a l l e x i s t i n g p i l l a r b o x e s w i t h t h e K - t y p e . W e at F E L I X a r e n o t i m p r e s s e d .

Small Ads Small ads will be accepted at ANY time and will appear in the next available issue. If ads are submitted by Monday 5:30pm, it is likely that they will be inserted in FELIX the following FRIDAY.

Ads are free to members of College, but a charge of £1.50 per col cm may be applied for peculiar financial gain ads or o u t s i d e c o n c e r n s at the discretion of the Editor.

URGENT!

•Haryadi Hallm, Indonesian, write to Bulog immediately.

•Consort Chamber Orchestra (IC's very own) urgently requires a com­petent HARPSICHORD/CONTINUO (virtuoso) who will attend faithfully and play brilliantly on the College's superb harpsichord. Apply to Dr D M Munro, Elec Eng Room 803, Int 3111 or 3333. Audition piece: Brandenburg 5. •Attention! Notice to all students and staff. We are looking for suitable subjects to take part in psychophysical experiments in theVISION R E S E A R C H G R O U P situated in the Biophysics dept of the Blackett Lab.

You are likely to be suitable if you had a squint or a lazy eye as a child, whether treated or not, or if when corrected by spectacles you have one eye with poorer vision than normal, then we would like to see you. If interested contact either Ian Holliday or A n n e t t e G r o u n d s , R o o m 714 Biophysics or Int 2925. Thanks for reading this. •Attention frustrated commuters! N e e d a lift into C o l l e g e ? Live in Clapham or Battersea areas? Much cheaper and comfortable than Lon­d o n T r a n s p o r t . C o n t a c t R o b e r t Demartino, Aero Eng 1 or phone 673 1541. • E a s y C a s h ! Anybody wishing to earn some money (about £1.20 per hour) manning the bar at Harlington on Wednesday and Saturday after­noons, please contact Nick Morton, via IC Union Office. Obviously, this will best suit s t u d e n t s who are actually playing sport out there. • C a l l i n g A l l A n o r e x i c s : A n y o n e interested in the formation of a self-help discussion group, please phone Ann V Salvage, int 2073, or write c/o Mech Eng dept. • A C C Meeting: The first meeting of term will be held on Monday, October 6, in SCR at 6:00pm. •Gaelic football. Anyone who saw Kerrry win the All -Ireland final in Sept 21 and is interested in forming a Gaelic football team please contact John Passmore, int 3915. •Croquet Club: Is anyone interested in playing croquet or helping to run the club? If so, please contact either

•Peter Watts (Maths 2) or Roger Brugge (Atmos Physics PG). •Swimming: University of London S w i m m i n g C l u b meets M o n d a y s 6 :30-7 :30pm at U L U , Malet St . Freshers' Night: October 6; Freshers' Trials: October 13th. All welcome — especially competitive swimmers of all standards.

• S o c c e r : C o u l d the S o c c e r C l u b Captain contact Ken Newton in the Sports Centre re. playing Chelsea reserves and Chelsea apprentices. • Smokestack require energet ic , e n t h u s i a s t i c r ivvum a n d b l o o z e drummer. Contact Eric or Sid via IC Radio, Int 3440 or Southside Studios. •Attractive, sincere, friendly Editor of FELIX would like to set up a personal section of the small ads whereby students can wish their mums happy birthday or merely construct cryptic codes for their friends benefit and the bemusement of others. All ads should be kept to about thirty words or under if poss ib le . A l l ads are inserted free of charge , but box numbers, if required, are 20p each.

Page 2 FEUX, September 29, 1980

Continued from front page

Micromouse T h e E u r o p e a n M i c r o - M o u s e finals were held in T h e a t r e A in M a t h s on Wednesday 17th September. T h i s event, sponsored by H a w k e r Siddeley , is a compet i t ion to find the quickest maze -so lv ing robot. T h e competit ion consisted of two parts: fastest r u n ; a n d virtuoso performance (judged by the audience) .

T h e mice were very ingenious; one had sonar and another had 'crab-like' diagonal and forward motion. However, both of these failed to complete the maze, the latter contestant complaining that his m o u s e n e e d e d a p r e c i s e l y built maze. T h e winner (Stirling Mouse) and only one to complete the m a z e was a k i t c h e n s ink variety using brass levers to direct itself along the maze. T h e owner will receive 81,000.

F r e d (complete wi th flashing red eyes) and M i d n i g h t Sun, a mouse built by Finnish students, tied for the virtuoso performance.

F r e d g a v e a s o n g a n d d a n c e routine while M i d n i g h t S u n wrote his name. It is interesting to note that when Fred failed to complete the m a z e e a r l i e r , his o w n e r s c o m p l a i n e d that he h a d b e e n overworked by Blue Peter. Yet the only mouse featured on Blue Peter on Thursday was M i d n i g h t Sun.

Most of the mice did not have m o u s e - l i k e e x t e r i o r s a n d it is perhaps a pity that this element was not considered lor a special p r i z e . W e feel the A m c o m i c a l would surely have won.

Home Office aid student refugees

F O L L O W I N G m a n y years of campaigning by refugee agencies, the Department of Education has r u l e d t h a t r e f u g e e s l i v i n g i n B r i t a i n w i l l be ent i t led to the same student award benefits as home students, rather than having to pay the full overseas students fees. M a n y points are left unclear by the decision, such as whether the research councils will follow suit with postgraduate grants; and a n u m b e r o f refugees are not e l i g i b l e u n d e r the new r a t i n g (those, for e x a m p l e , who have a p p l i e d f o r a s y l u m a n d a r e waiting for a H o m e Office decision; this can take up to two years). However, the decision is to be w e l c o m e d as b e i n g a m a j o r breakthrough. Whether the L E A s will act quickly enough to enable refugees to take u p places this year remains to be seen.

Inland Revenue screw up Sabbaticals T H E U N I O N has been informed by the Inland Revenue that U n i o n S a b b a t i c a l s s h o u l d pay tax on t h e i r g r a n t s . T h e y c l a i m that sabbaticals are 'employed' and as such are taxable under Schedule E ( s e c t i o n 181, I n c o m e a n d Corporation Taxes Act , 1970).

T h e matter is to be raised by J o h n Passmore at C o u n c i l , which has already agreed, in principle, to make up the Sabbaticals' grant to its former level in the event of such a situation occuring.

Phil the Greek slags off vets at IC

T H E D U K E of E d i n b u r g h visited the College on 4th September to s p e a k to t h e B r i t i s h E q u i n e V e t e r i n a r y Association ( B E V A ) which was holding its conference in the Sherfield Building.

T w o days earlier, Princess Anne had spoken to the vets, but the Duke's opposition to the proposed ban on the use of painkillers on horses d u r i n g c o m p e t i t i o n p r o ­voked controversy.

T h e International Equestrian F e d e r a t i o n p l a n s to b a n a l l p a i n k i l l i n g d r u g s th is y e a r as dosages have been abused in the past to keep the horse going right to the end of a three-day event when it should really have been withdrawn due to exhaustion.

T h e Duke is against abuse of the drugs, but is strongly in favour of them being used under controlled conditions. T h e Duke said that if use of drugs was outlawed, some r i d e r s m i g h t s t i l l s t r e t c h a n exhausted horse out to three days, b u t w i t h o u t w h a t is p r e s e n t l y regarded as 'a properly prescribed dose ' o f p a i n k i l l e r for fear o f disqualification.

Continued from front page

Police ignore IC after trophies stolen

However, the police at G e r a l d R o a d Police Station seem content to totally ignore I C and appear to have disregarded College security's suggestion. T h e police officer who is in charge of the case said that he w o u l d be back for ' f u r t h e r investigations' a little later, but has not been seen by the U n i o n since 29th J u l y .

J o h n Passmore ( I C U President) has just been given permission by the police to appeal for information concerning the whereabouts of the trophies. College security believe it is futile as the cups are so identifiable as belonging to I C that no one would risk attempting to sell them — and molten pewter doesn't have a very high market price. T h e y believe the cups are probably at the bottom of the Thames by now.

If, however, you do have any information, you should contact M r Burroughs in the College Security Office (int 2741). If you wish to see the complete list of trophies stolen you should contact the F E L I X or U n i o n Office.

Bill gets his gong M R B I L L W E S T , a C o l l e g e m a i n t e n a n c e o p e r a t i v e , was recently decorated by the Polish G o v e r n m e n t i n E x i l e for h is "outstanding act ion" during the last war . M r West who is the Pearly K i n g of Kensington and Chelsea, was reluctant to tell us what action merits the 'Cross of Freedom and Independence, with swords' but did sav that his son is Pearlv K i n g of M i l t o n Kevnes. W e l l ' d o n e Bill !

Safety Council C A P T A I N Lindley has recently been appointed C h a i r m a n of the College Safety Counci l . H e replaces D r D H Napier of C h e m E n g who has left to go to the University of Toronto.

Miserable failures G L I I L D S is faced with an uneasy start to the year as their President, M r Pat L e g g e t t , has fai led his metallurgy exams.

T h e Guilds H J T . Frank Rowsell, has also failed.

R C S and Mines survived the examiners axe but I C U is without an External Affairs Officer as M r Chris W e b b failed his C h e m E n g course.

W e at F E L I X suf fered the tragic loss of one our most enthu­siastic photographers, M r M i c k i e Marsh , who is currently making yogurt and preserving fruit back home. Mickie , who spent his entire exam period photographing the Iranian Embassy Siege, intends to retake his exams next year.

Announcements MR M O O N E Y is p leased to announce that his breakfasts will still be available this term.

He wishes it to be known that the set menu of: Cereal/Fruit ju ice ; E g g , B a c o n / S a u s a g e ; Toast and Marmalade, and, wait for it — UNLIMITED tea and coffee (take your thermos flasks - Ed) will be available for as little as 98 hard-earned pennies.

Mr Mooney would further wish it to be known that you can buy a book of ten tickets for £8.50 (tickets available from the Union Of f ice , S o u t h s i d e S h o p or Mooney's Office).

N A T I O N A L Westminster Bank Ltd are pleased to announce that after a delay which was unfor­tunately out of their control a SERVICE TILL is now operative on Level 2 in the S h e r f i e l d Building for the use of customers of all branches of Nat West. They would be grateful if users would note that should a card in any way be damaged or creased it could render the machine inoperative thereby causing inconvenience to others.

APPLICATIONS for the post of Sub-Warden of Bernard Sunley House (40-44 Evelyn Gardens) are invited from single post­graduate students. The success­ful applicant will probably have at least two years to complete at IC. The post involves helping the Warden with discipline and general o r g a n i s a t i o n in the House.

The House contains 108 male residents.

Rent-free accommodation will be provided.

Applications should be made in writing to the Warden, Mr Luiz Terxeira via the Residence Office by 6th October 1980.

FEUX, September 29, 1980 Page 3

Old Preversions

T H E s u m m e r ' s g o n e a n d a l l t h e leaves a r e l a l l i n g a n d y o u ' v e a l l r e t u r n e d o r j u s t c o m e u p as t h e c a s e m a y b e . W e l c o m e to t h e C o l l e g e - a n d t h e U n i o n — I h o p e y o u h a v e a g o o d t i m e .

I h a v e b e e n in o f f ice s i n c e Ist J u l y a n d l o o k o v e r a l e w ' o n g o i n g s i t u a t i o n s ' f r o m m y p r e d e c e s s o r C h r i s P o x . S i n c e t h e n o t h e r i t e m s o f g r e a t interest a r o s e .

Security T h e s e c u r i t y t h i n g seems to be s o l v i n g itself. R a c h e l a n d m y s e l f m e t M r R e e v e s (the n e w s e c u r i t y b o s s ) a b o u t t h e p r o p o s a l s o n s e c u r i t y a n d w e w e r e q u i t e s a t i s f i e d . C o l l e g e h a v e a g r e e d to r e t a i n t w o s e c u r i t y g u a r d s o n B e i t , a n d . S o u t h s i d e w i l l h a v e a r o v i n g p a t r o l s y s t e m .

Appeals I h a v e b e e n i n v o l v e d w i t h s e v e r a l A p p e a l s l o r s t u d e n t s w h o h a v e b e e n a s k e d to w i t h d r a w . T h i s s i t u a t i o n n o r m a l l y arises d u e to e x a m f a i l u r e s b u t c a n a l s o o c c u r d u r i n g t e r m -t i m e . I f a n y o n e is a s k e d to w i t h ­d r a w , t h e U n i o n is m o r e t h a n w i l l i n g to h e l p .

WUS Scholarship A s y o u get y o u r U n i o n c a r d e i t h e r t o d a y o r t o m o r r o w y o u w i l l be a s k e d to c o n t r i b u t e £ 1 to t h e T h i r d W o r l d S c h o l a r s h i p F u n d (Is one a l l o w e d the opportunity to refuse to be generous:' - F,d).

D i n n e r is s e r v e d

D I N N E R S - I N - H A L L w i l l be h e l d o n t h e f o l l o w i n g d a t e s d u r i n g t h e

A u t u m n T e r m :

7 t h O c t o b e r 1980 ( I n a u g u r a l )

4 t h N o v e m b e r 1980

18th N o v e m b e r 1980

9 t h D e c e m b e r 1980 ( C h r i s t m a s H a l l D i n n e r )

M e m b e r s o f t h e S e n i o r C o m m o n R o o m w i s h i n g to a t t e n d a n y of t h e

a b o v e d i n n e r s s h o u l d b o o k p l a c e s t h r o u g h M i s s K D a i l l y , R o o m 354 ,

S h e r f i e l d B u i l d i n g , ( i n t 2 2 3 1 ) u s i n g a b o o k i n g f o r m w h i c h c a n b e

o b t a i n e d e i t h e r f r o m M i s s D a i l l y o r f r o m t h e b o x l o c a t e d i n t h e S e n i o r

C o m m o n R o o m i n t h e S h e i i i e l d B u i l d i n g . S t u d e n t s s h o u l d b o o k t h r o u g h

t h e S t u d e n t U n i o n . T h e latest t i m e for b o o k i n g is 12 :00 n o o n o n t h e

F r i d a y p r e c e d i n g t h e d i n n e r .

Charges T h e cost o f a H a l l D i n n e r d u r i n g t h e A u t u m n T e r m w i l l b e £ 6 . 0 0 p e r

h e a d for s t a l l a n d £ 4 . 5 0 p e r h e a d l o r s t u d e n t s , e x c e p t l o r t h e C h r i s t m a s

H a l l D i n n e r — at w h i c h p i e - d i n n e r s h e r r y is i n c l u d e d i n t h e cost —

w h e n t h e cost w i l l be £ 6 . 5 0 a n d £ 5 . 0 0 p e r h e a d r e s p e c t i v e l y .

P a y m e n t for d i n n e r s b o o k e d m u s t be m a d e at t h e t i m e o f b o o k i n g b u t ,

as b o o k i n g s a r e a c c e p t e d s u b j e c t to t h e a v a i l a b i l i t y o f p l a c e s , d e p o s i t s

w i l l b e r e f u n d e d i f a d i n n e r is o v e r - s u b s c r i b e d at t h e t i m e o f b o o k i n g . It

is r e g r e t t e d t h a t n o r e f u n d s c a n b e m a d e i n r e s p e c t o f c a n c e l l a t i o n s b y

i n d i v i d u a l s a l t e r m i d d a y o n t h e M o n d a y p r e c e d i n g t h e d i n n e r .

General S t a l l a n d s t u d e n t s a t t e n d i n g H a l l D i n n e r s s h o u l d f o r g a t h e r i n t h e S e n i o r

C o m m o n R o o m o r t h e A n t e - R o o m i n t h e S h e r f i e l d B u i l d i n g —

d e p e n d i n g o n w h e t h e r t h e d i n n e r is b e i n g h e l d i n t h e S t a f f o r M a i n

D i n i n g H a l l — at 7 : 0 0 p m tor d i n n e r at 7 : 3 0 p m . ( T h e l o c a t i o n o f e a c h

d i n n e r — w h i c h w i l l d e p e n d o n t h e n u m b e r o f p e o p l e a t t e n d i n g — w i l l

be d i s p l a y e d o n n o t i c e b o a r d s o n t h e L e v e l 1 a n d L e v e l 2 L i f t C o n c o u r s e s

o f t h e . S h e r f i e l d B u i l d i n g ) .

S h e r r y o r o t h e r d r i n k s w i l l be a v a i l a b l e for p u r c h a s e i n t h e S e n i o r

C o m m o n R o o m o r A n t e - R o o m b e f o r e d i n n e r . T h e w i n e a n d p o r t s e r v e d

d u r i n g d i n n e r w i l l b e i n c l u d e d i n t h e o v e r a l l c h a r g e .

Dress E x c e p t l o r t h e C h r i s t m a s H a l l D i n n e r , w h e n e v e n i n g dress ( b l a c k tie)

s h o u l d b e w o r n , t h e c o r r e c t dress f o r m e n f o r H a l l D i n n e r s is a l o u n g e

s u i t .

T h i s is t h e t h i r d y e a r t h a t w e h a v e r u n t h e s c h e m e a n d it h a s b e e n v e r y success fu l i n t h e past . W i t h t h e m o n e y r a i s e d , W I S f i n d a T h i r d W o r l d s t u d e n t a n d s e n d h i m to I C to d o a n M S c . T h i s y e a r I w o u l d l i k e to e x p a n d t h e s c h e m e to m o r e t h a n o n e s t u d e n t b u t o n l y if y o u g i v e t h e m o n e y *

Nursery E a r l y i n J u l y I w a s a p p r o a c h e d by the R C A S t u d e n t s U n i o n w h o s a i d t h a t t h e i r N u r s e r y w a s i n d i f f i c u l t i e s b e c a u s e t h e y o n l y h a d t w o a p p l i c a n t s next y e a r . T h e y w e r e q u i t e w i l l i n g to let us h a v e the o t h e r e i g h t to t e n p l a c e s for o n e y e a r . A l t e r m u c h i n v e s t i g a t i o n a n d b u r e a u c r a c y I got a iist o f stal l a n d s t u d e n t s w h o m i g h t be i n t e r e s t e d b u t t h e r e s p o n s e w a s n e g l i g i b l e . I c a n n o t r e a l l y b e l i e v e i t s i n c e o u r n u r s e r y h a s a w a i t i n g list o f a b o u t l b r t v p e o p l e ( a n d that is i n J u l y not O c t o b e r ! ) . S o i n t h e e n d t h e p l a n w a s

s h e l v e d u n t i l a l a t e r d a t e ( s o m e t i m e n e v e r ? ) . T h e r e f o r e i f a n y o n e is i n t e r e s t e d i.e. has b a b i e s a n d n o n u r s e r y p l e a s e c o n t a c t m e .

Accommodation A t t h e t i m e o f w r i t i n g t h e s i t u a t i o n seems r a t h e r s a d . T h e C r a s h P a d has b e e n o p e n s i n c e 1st S e p t e m b e r a n d a l t h o u g h t h e r e s p o n s e is l o w at p r e s e n t I e x p e c t b y t e r m - t i m e t h a t it w i l l be m u c h l a r g e r . A s for offers of a c c o m m o d a t i o n c o m i n g i n , I w i s h t h e r e w e r e s o m e .

T o Finish W e l l , it 's v o u r U n i o n , w e get p a i d t o w o r k f o r y o u . I f t h e r e is a n y t h i n g y o u w a n t , p l e a s e get i n t o u c h a n d w i t h a b i t o f l u c k I ' l l e s c a p e a few t i m e s a n d a c t u a l l y sec y o u a l l . I l i v e in 4 3 4 L i n s t e a d , I n t e r n a l 4 3 2 0 ( w h e n il is l i x e d ) a n d i n the U n i o n O f f i c e I n t e r n a l 3 9 1 5 .

John Passmore I C U P r e s i d e n t

GORDON H a i r d r e s s i n g f o r m e n

1 K y n a n c e Place,

O f f Gloucester R o a d ,

( opposite Barclays )

F o r that personal touch, make an appointment with us — we offer 10% discount on production of your student union card ( except Saturdays )

J Added Bonus D u r i n g t h e f o r t h c o m i n g t e r m e x p e r i m e n t s w i l l b e m a d e i n t h e g e n e r a l

f o r m o f d i n n e r s i n h a l l w i t h a v i e w to i n c r e a s i n g t h e i r p o p u l a r i t y a n d

t h e s u p p o r t t h e y r e c e i v e .

O n T u e s d a y 4 t h N o v e m b e r , a f t e r d i n n e r , t h e C o n s o r t C h a m b e r

O r c h e s t r a c o n d u c t e d b y D r D M M o n r o ( D e p t o f E l e c E n g ) w i l l

p r o v i d e a s h o r t p r o g r a m m e l a s t i n g a b o u t t w e n t y to t h i r t y m i n u t e s . T h e

o r c h e s t r a c o m p r i s e s m u s i c i a n s e i t h e r f r o m I m p e r i a l C o l l e g e o r c l o s e l y

a s s o c i a t e d w i t h t h e C o l l e g e . T h e p r o g r a m m e w i l l c o n s i s t o f p o p u l a r

p i e c e s a n d w i l l i n c l u d e M o z a r t ' s E i n e K l e i n e N a c h t M u s i k . A t t h e

d i n n e r o n T u e s d a y 1 8 t h N o v e m b e r , t h e T h a m e s C o n s o r t M a l e V o i c e

V o c a l G r o u p u n d e r M r E d w a r d J a m e s ( C o m p u t e r C e n t r e ) w i l l p e r f o r m ,

a g a i n , for s o m e 2 0 to 30 m i n u t e s . T h e i r p r o g r a m m e o n th is o c c a s i o n w i l l

h a v e s o m e t h i n g l o r e v e r y o n e , r a n g i n g t h r o u g h the w h o l e g a m u t of m a l e

v o i c e m u s i c f r o m F ' r e n c h c h a n s o n to N e g r o s p i r i t u a l , f r o m V i c t o r i a n glee

to B a r b e r s h o p .

Page 4 FEUX, September 29, 1980

My Wee Bit

T E R M has a c t u a l l y s t a r t e d so w e ' r e l a n d e d w i t h a l l t h e d a y - t o - d a y h a p p e n i n g s o f t h e U n i o n .

Parking Permits B e i n g p o s i t i o n e d i n S o u t h K e n p r o v e s a w e e b i t t r i c k y w h e n e v e r y o n e d e c i d e s to b r i n g

t h e i r v e h i c l e s i n t o C o l l e g e . T h e U n i o n is a l l o c a t e d 184 p a r k i n g p e r m i t s a n d these a r e a w a r d e d o n a m e r i t basis . A p p l i c a t i o n f o r m s a r e a v a i l a b l e i n t h e U n i o n O f f i c e b u t m u s t be r e t u r n e d b y 5 : 3 0 p m o n F r i d a y 3 r d O c t o b e r 1 9 8 0 . T h e U n i o n P a r k i n g C o m m i t t e e w i l l m e e t d u r i n g t h e first w e e k e n d o f t e r m a n d a l i s t o f t h o s e l u c k y p e o p l e w h o h a v e b e e n a w a r d e d a p e r m i t w i l l b e p r i n t e d i n t h e F E L I X t o b e p u b l i s h e d o n F r i d a y 1 0 t h O c t o b e r . F o r t h e first w e e k o f t e r m p a r k i n g p l a c e s for s t u d e n t s w i l l be o n a first c o m e , first s e r v e d b a s i s b u t I w o u l d s t r o n g l y a d v i s e a g a i n s t b r i n g i n g y o u r c a r i n t o C o l l e g e .

Elections D u e to e x a m s b e i n g r a t h e r h a r s h (or students being thick/lazy -Ed) s o m e p o s i t i o n s o n U n i o n C o m m i t t e e s a r e n o w v a c a n t . T h e p o s i t i o n s o f E l e c E n g D e p R e p a n d M a n S c i D e p R e p h a v e a l s o to be f i l l e d . T h e p a p e r s f o r these posts w i l l b e p l a c e d o n n o t i c e b o a r d s i n t h e r e s p e c t i v e d e p a r t m e n t s for t e n C o l l e g e d a y s , a n d i f n e c e s s a r y , a p a p e r b a l l o t w i l l be h e l d i n t h e d e p a r t m e n t s .

P a p e r s f o r t h e p o s t o f E x t e r n a l A f f a i r s O f f i c e r w i l l b e p l a c e d o n t h e U n i o n N o t i c e b o a r d i n t h e L o w e r L o u n g e for t e n C o l l e g e d a y s . T h e e l e c t i o n w i l l t a k e p l a c e at t h e U G M to be h e l d o n T h u r s d a y 2 8 t h O c t o b e r at 1 : 0 0 p m i n t h e G r e a t H a l l . A t this U G M e l e c t i o n s w i l l a l s o t a k e p l a c e f o r : 3 m e m b e r s o f t h e P e r m a n e n t W o r k i n g P a r t y ; 3 m e m b e r s o f t h e A c a d e m i c A f f a i r s C o m m i t t e e ; 2 m e m b e r s o f t h C o m m u n i t y A c t i o n G r o u p ; 2 m e m b e r s o f t h e U n i o n F i n a n c e C o m m i t t e e ; 1 m e m b e r o f t h e E x t e r n a l A f f a i r s C o m m i t t e e . A g a i n , p a p e r s

w i l l b e p o s t e d o n t h e n o t i c e b o a r d i n t h e L o w e r L o u n g e for t e n C o l l e g e d a y s b e f o r e t h e e l e c t i o n . I f a n y o n e feels s / h e w a n t s to s t a n d , c o m e a n d h a v e a c h a t w i t h J o h n , R a e o r m y s e l f a n d w e ' l l t r y a n d te l l y o u w h a t it 's a l l a b o u t .

Duplicating Demonstrations T h e U n i o n has a G e s t e t n e r D u p l i c a t o r i n t h e F e l i x O f f i c e for t h e use o f U n i o n C l u b s a n d S o c i e t i e s . I n o r d e r to use t h e D u p l i c a t o r t h e P u b l i c i t y O f f i c e r f r o m e a c h C l u b o r S o c i e t y m u s t a t t e n d a d e m o n s t r a t i o n o n i n s t r u c t i o n o f t h e m a c h i n e . T h e first d e m o n s t r a t i o n w i l l be h e l d o n T u e s d a y 7 t h O c t o b e r at 1 : 0 0 p m i n t h e F E L I X O f f i c e .

INCOST N e x t E a s t e r I C U n i o n is a c t i n g as host to the I n t e r n a t i o n a l C o n f e r e n c e f o r S t u d e n t s o f T e c h n o l o g y . W e i n t e n d i n v i t i n g d e l e g a t e s f r o m a l l E u r o p e a n C o u n t r i e s a n d d u r i n g t h e w e e k I C s t u d e n t s w i l l be p r e s e n t i n g p a p e r s w h i c h w i l l b e c o m b i n e d w i t h v i s i t s t o c o m p a n i e s a n d o t h e r e x c i t i n g h a p p e n i n g s i n L o n d o n . H e l p w i l l b e n e e d e d i n t h e o r g a n i s a t i o n o f t h e e v e n t . I f y o u a r e i n t e r e s t e d d o get i n t o u c h a n d I ' l l t r y a n d k e e p y o u i n f o r m e d o f m e e t i n g s t h a t I ' l l b e h o l d i n g .

T h i s has t u r n e d o u t to b e r a t h e r a n e p i c p i e c e b u t h o p e f u l l y , i n f u t u r e , t h i n g s w i l l be o f a l i g h t e r n a t u r e .

H o p e y o u ' v e a g o o d start to t h e t e r m . S e e y o u a r o u n d a n d a b o u t .

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H a l d a n e Library - f a c t o r f i c t i o n ?

A r e y o u l o o k i n g for a c o o k b o o k to v a r y y o u r f l a t - d w e l l e r ' s s t a n d a r d m e n u s ? O r the c a r m a n u a l y o u n e e d to h e l p y o u get r i d o f t h a t no ise i n the e n g i n e ? O f f to f o r e i g n p a r t s , p e r h a p s , a n d i n n e e d o f a m a p o r a t r a v e l g u i d e ? D o y o u w a n t the latest S t a n l e y G i b b o n s c a t a ­l o g u e ? O r j u s t a n o v e l t o re l i eve the t e d i u m o f c o m ­m u t i n g ? P e r h a p s y o u h a v e a s m a l l a d y o u w a n t d i s p l a y e d (free o f charge ) ? A c o n c e r t for w h i c h y o u w a n t a c h e a p t i cket? O r d o y o u j u s t w a n t some b a c k g r o u n d m u s i c to soothe y o u t h r o u g h the latest essay o r pro j e c t ?

T h e n c o m e t o t h e H a l d a n e L i b r a r y — w e c a n s u p p l y a l l these n e e d s a n d v e r y m a n y m o r e . It 's n e x t to t h e G r e a t H a l l a n d is o p e n f r o m M o n d a y t o F r i d a y f r o m 9 : 3 0 a m t o 5 : 3 0 p m . I t is r e a l l y t h r e e l i b r a r i e s i n o n e : t h e l i b r a r y c o n t a i n i n g a l l t h e set texts l o r c o u r s e s i n t h e D e p a r t m e n t o f H u m a n i t i e s ( i n c l u d i n g m a t e r i a l o n s h o r t l o a n p e r i o d s , so t h a t it c a n be u s e d b y as m a n y p e o p l e as p o s s i b l e ) ; a v e r y g o o d m u s i c l i b r a r y , w i t h c l a s s i c a l a n d p o p r e c o r d s a n d t a p e s , s c o r e s a n d b o o k s ; a n d it is a l s o ( a n d h a s b e e n s i n c e 1 9 2 3 ) t h e S t u d e n t U n i o n L i b r a r y , p a r t l y f u n d e d b y t h e U n i o n a n d w i t h f o u r S t u d e n t

U n i o n r e p r e s e n t a t i v e s o n i t s L i b r a r y C o m m i t t e e .

T h e L i b r a r y is t h e C o l l e g e ' s g e n e r a l c u l t u r a l l i b r a r y . W e d o n ' t d e a l h e r e i n s c i e n t i f i c b o o k s , e x c e p t for t h e m o r e p o p u l a r t y p e , b u t w e d o h a v e b o o k s o n h i s t o r y , p o l i t i c s , p h i l o s o p h y , E n g l i s h a n d f o r e i g n l i t e r a t u r e , m u s i c , t r a v e l , b i o g r a p h y a n d o t h e r s u b j e c t s . T h e r e is a g o o d s t o c k o f fiction o f a l l t y p e s , p a r t i c u l a r l y s c i e n c e f i c t i o n . T h e L i b r a r y h a s t w o s p e c i a l c o l l e c t i o n s : t h e C o r i n C o l l e c t i o n (a s m a l l c o l l e c t i o n o f 2 0 t h C e n t u r y p r i v a t e press b o o k s ) a n d t h e H . G . W e l l s C o l l e c t i o n . T h e M u s i c L i b r a r y c a n o b l i g e w i t h r e c o r d i n g s o f p o p m u s i c , f o l k , j a z z , a n d b i g b a n d s , f i l m m u s i c , s h o w s , s tage p l a y s , o p e r a , o r a t o r i o , c h o r a l m u s i c , s y m p h o n i e s , c h a m b e r m u s i c , i n s t r u m e n t a l m u s i c a n d s o l o s o n g . It h a s a n u m b e r o f s t a n d a r d m u s i c a l scores a n d a g o o d c o l l e c t i o n o f b o o k s o n m u s i c a n d o n h i - f i . W e c a n a l s o a r r a n g e c l a s s i c a l m u s i c c o n c e r t b o o k i n g s for s t u d e n t s at a d v a n ­t a g e o u s rates t h r o u g h ' Y o u t h a n d

M u s i c " , t h e M u s i c L i b r a r i a n d e a l s w i t h b o o k i n g s a n d h a s d e t a i l s o f c o n c e r t p r o g r a m m e s .

W e h a v e a g o o d r a n g e o f j o u r n a l s a n d p e r i o d i c a l s , i n c l u d i n g The Times, The Guardian, a n d The Financial Times. R e g u l a r s u b s c r i p ­t i o n s i n c l u d e Time Out, Radio

Times, The Listener, Times literary, educational and higher educational supplements, Punch, Private Eye, Amateur Photographer, Motional Geographic, Gay News, Great Outdoors, Practical Electronics, Popular Hi-fi, a n d Which as w e l l as a c a d e m i c j o u r n a l s s u c h as Foreign Affairs

a n d t h e Journal of Contempory History. W e a l s o p r o v i d e s h e l f -r o o m a n d r e a d i n g s p a c e f o r n e w s p a p e r s a n d o t h e r j o u r n a l s b o u g h t b y v a r i o u s n a t i o n a l g r o u p s i n C o l l e g e — t h e C o l l e g e H e l l e n i c T u r k i s h a n d C h i n e s e S o c i e t i e s a r e a m o n g a n u m b e r o f g r o u p s p r o ­v i d i n g d a i l y n e w s p a p e r s a n d o t h e r p u b l i c a t i o n s .

T h e L i b r a r y e x i s t s f o r t h e b e n e f i t o f t h e w h o l e C o l l e g e . C o m e a n d find o u t w h a t w e c a n o i l e r . I f y o u n e e d a n y h e l p finding b o o k s , r e c o r d s , m a p s o r a n y o t h e r i n f o r m a t i o n , t h e n c o m e a n d a s k u s . T h e L i b r a r i a n , R i c h a r d W i l l i a m s , a n d t h e M u s i c L i b r a r i a n , M i s s V C e d r i c , w i l l g l a d l y h e l p , as w i l l a n y o f t h e L i b r a r y staff. T e l l us . t o o , o f b o o k s a n d r e c o r d s w h i c h y o u t h i n k t h e L i b r a r y s h o u l d g e t . R e m e m b e r t o o , t h a t u p to a t h i r d o f o u r s t o c k m a y b e o u t o n l o a n — w e c a n r e s e r v e b o o k s a n d r e c o r d s for y o u a n d let y o u k n o w w h e n t h e y a r e a v a i l a b l e . T h e L i b r a r y m a y be s m a l l , b u t

it 's w e l l - s t o c k e d : c o m e a n d find o u t w h a t w e h a v e to offer.

Richard G Williams

JCR chairs

reupholstered!

T h e J C R f u r n i t u r e , w h i c h h a s b e e n f a l l i n g to p i e c e s for t h e last t h r e e y e a r s , is n o w o n t h e r o a d to r e c o v e r y . T h e o p e r a t i o n , w h i c h s h o u l d b e c o m p l e t e d b y m i d -O c t o b e r i n v o l v e s r e u p h o l s t e r i n g t h e c h a i r s a n d c o v e r i n g t h e m i n b r o w n , c r e a m a n d o r a n g e f a b r i c , as o p p o s e d to v i n y l .

I n a d d i t i o n , a l l of t h e coffee t a b l e s a r e b e i n g r e - t o p p e d . R a e S n e e ( D P ) e m p h a s i s e s t h a t a l t h o u g h t h e J C R is i n C o l l e g e , it is a U N I O N r o o m a n d a l l d a m a g e has to b e p a i d for b y t h e U n i o n .

Cleaners Axed!

D U E T O f u r t h e r c u t s i n C o l l e g e e x p e n d i t u r e , t h e n u m b e r o f c l e a n e r s i n s t u d e n t h a l l s o f r e s i d e n c e has b e e n r e d u c e d . T h e S o u t h s i d e c l e a n e r s w i l l n o w c l e a n s i x t e e n r o o m s i n s t e a d o f t w e l v e , a n d r o o m s w i l l be c l e a n e d t h o r ­o u g h l y o n l y o n c e a f o r t n i g h t . T h e b i n s w i l l s t i l l be e m p t i e d a n d t h e h a n d b a s i n s w a s h e d e v e r y d a y . S h e e t s w i l l b e p r o v i d e d o n c e a w e e k for t h e r e s i d e n t s to c h a n g e t h e m ­selves. T h e cuts h a v e b e e n a c h i e v e d w i t h o u t a n y o n e b e i n g m a d e r e d u n d a n t ; n o n e w p e r m a n e n t s t a f f h a v e b e e n t a k e n o n s i n c e J a n u a r y , so t h a t t h e n u m b e r o f c l e a n e r s h a s d r o p p e d t h r o u g h p e o p l e l e a v i n g . T h e r e m a i n i n g e x t r a c l e a n e r s h a v e m o v e d f r o m S o u t h s i d e t o t h e n e w L i n s t e a d e x t e n s i o n .

FEUX, September 29, 1980 Page 5

Matters Raised

Welcome Y E S , yet a g a i n w e l c o m e to I C a n d a l t h o u g h y o u ' r e p r o b a b l y s ick o f h e a r i n g it I w i s h y o u a l o n g , h a p p y a n d s u c c e s s f u l s t a y h e r e , a n d h o p e y o u m a k e t h e m o s t o f w h a t I C U n i o n has to offer y o u .

Freshers' Fair T h i s is w h e r e t h e m o s t o f w h a t w e d o o f f e r y o u is o n s h o w , w i t h a b o u t 1 0 0 c l u b s a n d s o c i e t i e s t r y i n g t o g r a b y o u r a t t e n t i o n . P l e a s e h a v e a g o o d l o o k a r o u n d a n d feel free to p u t y o u r n a m e d o w n for lots o f t h i n g s ; a f t e r a l l , t h e y ' r e n o t a l l o w e d to t a k e a n y m e m b e r s h i p fees at F r e s h e r s ' F a i r , so y o u ' v e g o t n o t h i n g t o l o s e . T h e r e w i l l be stalls t h r o u g h o u t t h e U n i o n B u i l d i n g a n d S h e r f i e l d R e f e c t o r y / Q u e e n s L a w n a r e a , a n d t h e b a r s o n b o t h sites w i l l be o p e n a l l a f t e r n o o n f o r y o u r r e f r e s h m e n t . P l e a s e d o n ' t c o m e b e f o r e 2 : 3 0 p m , h o w e v e r , a s e v e r y o n e w i l l s t i l l be s e t t i n g u p . S t a l l h o l d e r s s h o u l d h a v e r e c e i v e d d e t a i l s ( c h e c k y o u r l e t t e r - r a c k s ! ) — i f n o t p l e a s e c o m e a n d see m e . A m a p a n d a l p h a b e t i c a l list o f societ ies is i n s e r t e d i n this issue o f F E L I X .

Crash Pad F o r t h o s e o f y o u u n f o r t u n a t e e n o u g h to s t i l l h a v e n o w h e r e to

l i v e , y o u c a n get a c a m p - b e d i n t h e U n i o n B u i l d i n g f o r 5 0 p a n i g h t , j u s t t u r n u p at B e i t A r c h w a y at 1 1 : 0 0 p m , s u i t a b l y a r m e d w i t h a s l e e p i n g b a g .

Security I d o n ' t w a n t to be a l a r m i s t , b u t a f t e r t h e v e r y u n f o r t u n a t e i n c i d e n t w h e n a S o u t h s i d e o c c u p a n t w a s r a p e d last t e r m , I w o u l d u r g e t h e w o m e n a m o n g s t y o u n o t to w a n d e r a r o u n d a l o n e , e s p e c i a l l y l a t e at n i g h t ( t h e r e a r e p l e n t y o f p e o p l e a r o u n d to w a l k y o u h o m e f r o m t h e B a r ! ) . I ' d a lso a d v i s e c h e c k i n g w h o is i n t h e lift b e f o r e y o u step i n it a n d d o n ' t i f i t 's a s u s p i c i o u s s t r a n g e r .

Southside Bar I n t h e I C U H a n d b o o k it s a y s " T h e m a i n b a r is a p a s s a g e w i t h a b a r d o w n o n e s i d e . . . t h e r e is n o a t m o s p h e r e w h a t s o e v e r . . . " T h i s w a s c e r t a i n l y t r u e , b u t b y t h e t i m e y o u ' r e r e a d i n g t h i s t h e e x t e n s i v e r e d e c o r a t i o n s s h o u l d b e f i n i s h e d , a n d y o u w i l l b e a b l e to r e l a x i n a n i c e l y l i t , p u b - t y p e a t m o s p h e r e a n d e n j o y y o u r r e a l a l e . S o r u s h a l o n g to see t h e n e w -l o o k S o u t h s i d e B a r ( a n d d o n ' t f o r g e t t o b u y t h e E x e c a p i n t w h i l e y o u ' r e t h e r e ) .

T h a t ' s a l l f o r n o w , n o d o u b t I ' l l h a v e lots m o r e to say i n t h e n e x t i s s u e . If y o u ' v e a n y q u e r i e s o r p r o b l e m s , d o n ' t h e s i t a t e to ask , o r j u s t c o m e a n d say h e l l o to m e i n t h e B a r .

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C o n s t i t u e n t C o l l e g e U n i o n s

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Club C o m e a n d v i s i t t h e C i t y a n d G u i l d s C o l l e g e M o t o r C l u b s t a l l . W e a r e n e x t to B o o n t h e Q u e e n s L a w n , a n d h a v e got t h e p r i v a t e l y b u i l t L e M a n s r a c i n g c a r , o f M r A l a i n D e C a d e n e t , o n d i s p l a y .

T h i s has b e e n s p e c i a l l y lent to us f o r F r e s h e r s ' F a i r b y M r d e C a d e n e t .

T h e C l u b o r g a n i s e s m a n y t y p e s of. e v e n t s a n d c a t e r s for e v e r y o n e ( y o u n e e d n o t h a v e a c a r t o b e n e f i t f r o m b e i n g a m e m b e r ) ; m e m b e r s h i p is o p e n to a n y o n e at I m p e r i a l C o l l e g e , so c o m e a l o n g a n d f i n d o u t m o r e a b o u t t h e C l u b .

M C Turner C A P T A I N

C&G Y E T A N O T H E R w e l c o m e to t h e w o n d e r f u l w o r l d o f I m p e r i a l C o l l e g e , t h i s t i m e e x t e n d e d m a i n l y t o t h o s e o f y o u w i t h a m o r e p r a c t i c a l l e a n i n g (?) i . e . e n g i n e e r s , h e r e a f t e r r e f e r r e d to as G u i l d s m e n . W e l c o m e G u i l d s m e n . C i t y a n d G u i l d s U n i o n h a s p l e n t y t o o f f e r y o u , i n f a c t a l m o s t e v e r y t h i n g e x c e p t a P r e s i d e n t . N o t c o n t e n t w i t h l e a v i n g us m i n u s t h e ' m a n a t t h e t o p ' , t h e p o w e r s t h a t b e a l s o s a w f i t t o s w e e p o u r a b l e - b o d i e d t r e a s u r e r f r o m o u r m i d s t . . T h e r e f o r e , t h e d i v e r s e e n t e r t a i n m e n t s p l a n n e d f o r y o u b y G u i l d s n o w i n c l u d e t h e e l e c t i o n s o f P r e s i d e n t a n d H o n J u n i o r T r e a s u r e r . Y o u w i l l f i n d m o r e d e t a i l s o f t h e e l e c t i o n s i n G u i l d s h e e t .

T h e first G u i l d s e v e n t is t h e F r e s h e r s ' R e c e p t i o n , h e l d t h i s

a f t e r n o o n i n t h e U n i o n C o n c e r t H a l l . It is v i t a l t h a t y o u a t t e n d — a n e x c e l l e n t o p p o r t u n i t y to r u b s h o u l d e r s w i t h m a n y i l l u s t r i o u s G u i l d s m e n , a n d g u a r a n t e e d t o c a t e r f o r a l l m a n n e r o f t a s t e s . H a v i n g r e c e i v e d a n d w e l c o m e d y o u w e t h e n p r o c e e d to t h e n e x t G u i l d s e v e n t . . . t h e W o m e n ' s R e c e p t i o n o n W e d n e s d a y n i g h t i n t h e U n i o n O f f i c e , a l l G u i l d s w o m e n freshers a r e i n v i t e d to c o m e a l o n g .

H a v i n g finally t i r e d o f w e l c o m i n g y o u , w e p l u n g e s t r a i g h t i n t o e n t e r t a i n i n g y o u . A n E n t s C o n c e r t o n T h u r s d a y n i g h t is c l o s e j y f o l l o w e d b y a b a r n i g h t o n F r i d a y , to l e a v e y o u b r e a t h l e s s a n d s t a g g e r i n g a f t e r a h e c t i c first w e e k at c o l l e g e .

Sara McGmness C&G Hon Sec

O H F U C K ! H o w d o y o u s t a r t these a r t i c l e s (Not with 'Oh fuck'

- Ed). S h o u l d I b e o v e r w h e l m i n g l y ef fusive a n d w e l c o m e y o u so o f t e n t h a t y o u ' r e s ick to t h e b a c k t e e t h o f it a l l ? S h o u l d I t r y to c o n v e y t h e i m p r e s s i o n t h a t R C S U is t h e greates t t h i n g s i n c e s l i c e d b r e a d ? O r s h o u l d I m e r e l y g i v e t h e facts?

W e l l , t h e facts a r e as follows: Monday 29th September is F r e s h e r s ' U G M i n t h e G r e a t H a l l at 2 : 0 0 p m ; Tuesday 30th September t h e R C S stal l w i l l be at t h e F r e s h e r s ' F a i r a l l a f t e r n o o n a n d i n t h e e v e n i n g t h e r e w i l l b e a F r e s h e r s ' P u b C r a w l — m e e t i n S t a n ' s b e t w e e n 6 : 0 0 p m a n d 6 : 3 0 p m ; Saturday 4th

October t h e r e w i l l be t h e a n n u a l T i d d l y w i n k s d o w n O x f o r d S t r e e t — m e e t i n t h e R C S U O f f i c e b e t w e e n 9 :30 a n d 1 0 : 0 0 a m ; Sunday

5th October is t h e B a r N i g h t i n t h e U n i o n B a r at 7 : 0 0 p m .

T h o s e a r e t h e e v e n t s for t h e f i r s t w e e k . O t h e r f o r t h c o m i n g e v e n t s w i l l b e p u b l i s h e d i n F E L I X , i n B r o a d s h e e t a n d o n p o s t e r s a r o u n d C o l l e g e .

F i n a l l y , I w i l l j u s t m e n t i o n t h e d a t e s o f t h e F r e s h e r s ' D i n n e r s . T h e s e a r e :

C h e m i s t r y : T u e s d a y 7 t h O c t o b e r M a t h s : F r i d a y 1 0 t h O c t o b e r P h y s i c s : T u e s d a y 1 4 t h O c t o b e r L i f e S c i : F r i d a y 1 7 t h O c t o b e r T i c k e t s for t h e s e a r e a v a i l a b l e

f r o m s o c i a l r e p s a n d d e p r e p s a n d a l s o f r o m U n i o n O f f i c e r s .

O h , a n d b y t h e w a y , w e l c o m e to I C .

Paul Johnson RCSC VP

P r o t e c t i n g Y o u r

P r o p e r t y

Lost Property E v e r y y e a r h u n d r e d s o f i t e m s o f p e r s o n a l

p r o p e r t y a r e f o u n d a n d h a n d e d i n a t t h e

S e c u r i t y O f f i c e — m a n y s u c h i t e m s a r e n e v e r

c l a i m e d b y t h e l o s e r s a n d e v e n t u a l l y a r e

r e t u r n e d to t h e finders. S t u d e n t s a n d s ta f f w h o

l o s e p r o p e r t y s h o u l d p r o m p t l y i n f o r m t h e

s e c u r i t y staff a n d i n m a n y cases t h e i t e m s w i l l

b e s p e e d i l y r e s t o r e d . P e r s o n s finding i t e m s o f

p e r s o n a l p r o p e r t y s h o u l d h a n d t h e m i n to t h e

S e c u r i t y O f f i c e r o r to o n e o f t h e m e s s e n g e r s o r

s e c u r i t y g u a r d s o n a n y o f t h e b u i l d i n g s .

Thefts It is a n u n f o r t u n a t e fact o f l i fe t h a t , o n a n

o p e n c a m p u s s u c h as th is w h e r e a v e r y l a r g e

n u m b e r o f p e o p l e a r e a l l o w e d c o n s i d e r a b l e

f r e e d o m o f a c c e s s , p e r i o d i c a l s p a t e s o f s t e a l i n g

o c c u r . A g o o d d e a l o f t h i s is d u e t o t h e

i n c u r s i o n s o f ' w a l k i n ' t h i e v e s w h o p r e y o n

i n s t i t u t i o n s s u c h a s t h i s a n d o n m u s e u m s ,

s e v e r a l o f w h i c h a r e i n c l o s e p r o x i m i t y to t h e

C o l l e g e . B o t h s t u d e n t s a n d staf f a r e r e q u e s t e d

t o c o o p e r a t e w i t h t h e s e c u r i t y s t a f f b y

p r o m p t l y r e p o r t i n g to t h e S e c u r i t y O f f i c e r a n y

s u s p i c i o u s p e r s o n s seen l o i t e r i n g i n ' C o l l e g e

b u i l d i n g s , o r e n t e r i n g off ices o r l a b o r a t o r i e s

w i t h n o a p p a r e n t a u t h o r i t y . W a l l e t s , c a s h ,

c h e q u e b o o k s , c a l c u l a t o r s , s l i d e r u l e s a n d

w a t c h e s a r e t h e t h i n g s m o s t c o m m o n l y s t o l e n

a n d t h e y s h o u l d n e v e r be left i n j a c k e t s o r

b r i e f c a s e s i n u n a t t e n d e d r o o m s , i n p a r t i c u l a r ,

c h e q u e b o o k s a n d c h e q u e c a r d s s h o u l d a l w a y s

b e c a r r i e d s e p a r a t e l y o n t h e p e r s o n a s

i n s t a n c e s h a v e o c c u r r e d w h e r e h e a v y

w i t h d r a w a l s o f c a s h f r o m b a n k s h a v e b e e n

m a d e t h r o u g h t h i e v e s h a v i n g o b t a i n e d

p o s e s s i o n o f b o t h c a r d a n d c h e q u e b o o k .

Cycles P e d a l c y c l e s a r e c u r r e n t l y v e r y a t t r a c t i v e to

t h i e v e s a n d i f b r o u g h t o n to c a m p u s t h e y

s h o u l d be s e c u r e d to t h e c y c l e r a c k w i t h a

h e a v y c h a i n a n d s t o u t p a d l o c k . P l a s t i c

c o v e r e d c a b l e s o f t h e k i n d p u r c h a s e d i n c y c l e

s h o p s a r e o f l i t t le d e t e r r e n t to t h i e v e s a n d

s h o u l d n o t b e u s e d . I f y o u v a l u e y o u r c y c l e

p l e a s e i n s u r e i t .

Car Parking U n l e s s y o u h a v e b e e n a u t h o r i s e d to p a r k y o u r

c a r o n t h e c a m p u s d o n o t b r i n g it i n t o t h e

C o l l e g e C a r P a r k o t h e r w i s e y o u w i l l i n c o n ­

v e n i e n c e s o m e p e r s o n w h o has a n a u t h o r i s e d

p a r k i n g p l a c e . D e r e l i c t v e h i c l e s a r e a l s o f r o m

t i m e to t i m e a n e m b a r a s s m e n t to t h e C o l l e g e

a n d a v e h i c l e w h i c h ceases to be r o a d w o r t h y

s h o u l d b e d i s p o s e d o f b y t h e o w n e r a n d n o t

left o n t h e c a r p a r k w h e r e it m a y q u i c k l y be

c a n n i b a l i s e d b y p e r s o n s w h o a r e q u i c k t o

r e c o g n i s e t h a t it h a s b e e n a b a n d o n e d . M o t o r

c y c l e s b r o u g h t i n t o t h e C o l l e g e m u s t b e

r e g i s t e r e d w i t h t h e S e c u r i t y O f f i c e r a n d

s t u d e n t s a r e r e q u e s t e d to p a r k o n l y i n t h e

a u t h o r i s e d p a r k i n g s p a c e s . P a r k i n g i n b e t w e e n

m o t o r v e h i c l e s c a n resul t i n d a m a g e to b o t h

c a r s a n d m o t o r c y c l e s .

GRR Reeves C H I E F S E C U R I T Y O F F I C E R

Page 6 FEUX, September 29, 1980

ents films tfl 1980

Oct 2 Capricorn One

Elliot Gould and Telly Savalas star in the worldwide deception about a space trip to Mars. Three 'dead' as­tronauts fight for their lives. A, 123mins.

Oct 9 The Eagle Has Landed

Michael Caine, Donald Sutherland, Jenny Agutter, etc star. An attempt to kidnap Winston Churchill whilst disguised as Polish troops. A, 132mins.

Oct 16 The Front Page

Newspaper scoop on the execution of a Chicago police killer. Jack Lemmon and Walter Matthau. AA, 105mins.

Oct 23 The Wild Geese

Richard Burton, Roger Moore, Richard Harris in fast moving war film. Good bloody action in Africa. AA, 134mins.

Oct 30 Death on the Nile

Agatha Christie thriller starring Peter Ustinov as Hercule Poirot. Lots of star victims. A, 140mins.

Nov 6 Exorcist II (The Heretic)

Richard Burton leads the sequel to the Exorcist. X, 102mins.

Nov 13 Foul Play

Comedy starring Dudley Moore and Goldie Hawn. Beautiful divorcee flees under­world menaces trying to kill her. A, 116mins.

Nov 20 Rag Premiere Special surprise movie. First time actually shown live at IC on Nov 20, 1980.

Nov 27 m mm m

Confessions from

a Holiday Camp

Yet another "Con­fessions' film. This time in the Fun-for-all holi­day camp. Oh Godt X, 88mins.

Dec 4 Looking For Mr Goodbar

Diane Keaton is the young woman on an erotic pub crawl. X, 136mins.

Dec 11 Tommy

Ken Russell's film based on the brilliant rock opera by the Who. Oliver Reed and Elton John co-star with Roger Daltrey in the lead. AA, m m i n s ^

FELIX, September 29, 1980

CLUBS & SOCIETIES Opsoc smash box office records in Budleigh Salterton

T h e invasion starts quietly; the first three carloads arrive in the ear ly e v e n i n g . T h e a d v a n c e party spl i ts up into two groups, one to prepare for the arrival of the others the next day, the rest ( the author's party ) to check that the banner is correctly positioned above the High Street. This being done they quickly retire to The Feathers for a well earned pint. The Operatic Society Tour of Budleigh Salterton begins.

T h e f o l l o w i n g t h i n g s s t a r t i n e a r n e s t w i t h t h e a r r i v a l o f t h e s c e n e r y i n a f u r n i t u r e v a n . T h o s e u n f o r t u n a t e to h a v e a r r i v e d first, h e l p u n l o a d — those w i t h m o r e T o u r e x p e r i e n c e a r r i v e j u s t i n t i m e to see t h e e m p t y v a n d e p a r t ­i n g . B y t h e e v e n i n g t h e f u l l c o m p l e m e n t h a s a r r i v e d ; a l l t h e cast a n d o r c h e s t r a a r e d r i n k i n g i n T h e F e a t h e r s ; t h e s t a g e c r e w b e g i n w o r k . T h e n f o l l o w s t h r e e d a y s o f i n t e n s i v e r e h e a r s i n g , t h e c a s t i n t h e m o r n i n g a n d t h e e v e n i n g , t h e o r c h e s t r a i n t h e a f t e r n o o n .

M e a n w h i l e , t h e l o c a l s a r e

s t r i k i n g b a c k ; t h e y a r e n o t b u y i n g t h e t i c k e t s . P e r h a p s The Mikado is n o t p o p u l a r a r o u n d E x m o u t h ; t h e T r e a s u r e r m o v e s a r o u n d i n a c o n s t a n t fit o f d e p r e s s i o n . B u t b y t h e first n i g h t a l l is w e l l . W i t h a n e w b l a z e o f p u b l i c i t y i n t h e f o r m o f T - s h i r t s a n d l i t t l e g r e e n posters , t h e p o p u l a c e a r e f l o c k i n g i n t h e i r t h o u s a n d s t o b u y t h e t i c k e t s ; r u m o u r s s t a r t o f b l a c k m a r k e t t i c k e t p r i c e s .

A f t e r t h e first n i g h t is o v e r t h e T o u r s o c i a l l ife r e a l l y gets g o i n g . O n t h e T h u r s d a y a select g r o u p a r e i n v i t e d i n t o t h e h o m e o f a l o c a l C o l o n e l . T h e g i n f lows free ly

a n d s o m e s i n g i n g o c c u r s ; o n t h e w a y h o m e w e get fifteen p e o p l e i n a C i t r o e n 2 C V . A f t e r t h e s h o w o n F r i d a y n i g h t , a l a r g e s c a l e v i s i t to t h e E x m o u t h C h i n e s e a n d s e a f o o d r e s t a u r a n t s is o r g a n i s e d .

T h e m i d d l e w e e k e n d b r i n g s f resh r e i n f o r c e m e n t s f r o m L o n d o n for t h e c h a r i t y c o n c e r t . M y s t e r i o u s figures e n t o m b e d i n s l e e p i n g b a g s a p p e a r at n i g h t i n s p a c e p r e v i o u s l y o c c u p i e d b y sui tcases . T h e c h a r i t y c o n c e r t o n t h e S u n d a y is s u c c e s s f u l i n r a i s i n g m o n e y for t h e c h u r c h o r g a n f u n d . A f t e r w a r d s , h a l f t h e S o c i e t y t a k e t h e i r p a r e n t s for a c r e a m t e a , t h e o t h e r h a l f g o w i t h t h e i r f r i e n d s ; t h i s c a u s e s t r a f f i c j a m s at A L a R o n d e a n d N e w t o n P o p p l e f o r d .

T h e s e c o n d w e e k b e g i n s w i t h a d a y o f f , i . e . n o s h o w i n t h e e v e n i n g . T r a d i t i o n a l l y i t is t h e wettest d a y o f T o u r ; this y e a r is n o e x c e p t i o n . U n d a u n t e d b y t h e r a i n , t h e c o m p a n y splits u p a n d goes o u t f o r t h e d a y . T h e largest

p a r t i e s g o to L y n m o u t h a n d p o n y t r e k k i n g o n D a r t m o o o r . T h e m i n i b u s r e t u r n s f r o m D a r t m o o r w i t h w h e e l a r c h e s i n t a c t ! T h e rest o f t h e w e e k passes q u i c k l y ; t h e b a r n d a n c e , t h e c o n c e r t p a r t y , t h e p y j a m a p a r t y , t h e t e n n i s c o m p e t i t i o n , t h e b a r b e c u e , t h e b e a u t i f u l b u m s c o m p e t i t i o n , a n d m a n y o t h e r s o c i a l e v e n t s a r e s u d d e n l y o v e r .

O n t h e last n i g h t , a n o t h e r T o u r t r a d i t i o n s tr ikes . P i t t i S i n g gets l a r y n g i t i s a n d c a n ' t s i n g , b u t s u c h is t h e c o m p e t e n c e o f t h e O p s o c c h o r u s t h a t th is c a u s e s n o p r o b l e m s ( w e l l d o n e , L i z ) . A f t e r t e n P e r ­f o r m a n c e s a n d o n e c o n c e r t w e r e a l i s e t h a t T o u r is r e a l l y o v e r — a l l t h a t r e m a i n s to d o is to c l e a n o u t t h e s c h o o l a n d g o t o T h e F e a t h e r s f o r a last p a s t y b e f o r e l e a v i n g f o r L o n d o n . A s t h e last O p s o c c a r l o a d l e a v e s for L o n d o n p e a c e d e s c e n d s o n B u d l e i g h S a l t e r t o n u n t i l n e x t t i m e .

Alan Crewe

While we have your attention

D O Y O U e n j o y l i s t e n i n g t o / s i n g i n g l i g h t o p e r a ?

I f so, I m p e r i a l C o l l e g e O p e r a t i c S o c i e t y , a l i a s O P S O C o r I C O S is a s o c i e t y y o u s h o u l d j o i n . W e h a v e t h r e e m a i n p r o d u c t i o n s , i n F e b ­r u a r y (this y e a r it 's R u d d i g o r e ) i n M a r c h (still to be d e c i d e d ) a n d i n

J u l y w e g o o n T o u r to D e v o n . T h i s y e a r , as w e l l as t h e a n n u a l c a r o l s i n g i n g t r i p , w e i n t e n d to g i v e a C h r i s t m a s c o n c e r t .

W e p e r f o r m m a i n l y w o r k s b y G i l b e r t a n d S u l l i v a n a l t h o u g h w e h a v e e x p e r i m e n t e d w i t h w o r k s b y J o h n B l o w a n d O f f e n b a c h , a n d w e a l w a y s s i n g i n E n g l i s h . Y o u d o n ' t h a v e to b e a s i n g e r to j o i n us , as s tage c r e w , f r o n t o f h o u s e staf f a n d v o l u n t e e r s to h e l p w i t h c o s t u m e s a r e a l w a y s w e l c o m e . I f a f ter r e a d i n g this a r t i c l e y o u a r e st i l l i n t e r e s t e d , c o m e a n d see us at t h e F r e s h e r s ' F a i r , a t t h e M u s i c F a i r , o r c a t c h us at r e h e a r s a l i n t h e M u s i c R o o m o f 53 P r i n c e ' s G a t e ( o p p o s i t e M e c h E n g ) o n T u e s d a y -e v e n i n g s , f a i l i n g t h a t c o n t a c t m e v i a t h e U n i o n O f f i c e o r t h e M i n e s l e t t e r - r a c k s .

Alan Crewe

Choir C O M E a n d see us , l i s t e n to us , a n d j o i n us at t h e F r e s h e r s ' F a i r a n d t h e M u s i c F a i r o n T u e s d a y 3 0 t h S e p t e m b e r a n d o u r f i r s t r e h e a r s a l o n T h u r s d a y 2 n d O c t o b e r at 5 : 4 5 p m i n R o o m 3 4 2 , M e c h E n g d e p a r t m e n t . T h i s y e a r ' s p r o g r a m m e c o n t a i n s : M o z a r t : C M i n o r M a s s ; F i n z i : I n T e r r a P a x ; B a c h : C a n t a t a N o 30 ; B r a h m s : R e q u i e m ; H a n d e l : D i x i t D o m i n u s ; M e n d e l s s o h n : 2 n d S y m p h o n y .

I M P E R I A L C O L L E G E T O L K GLUB

•TV

Tonight Union Lower Refectory

8 00pm

Page 8 FEUX, September 29, 1980

CLUBS & SOCIETIES Symphony

Orchestra T H E S Y M P H O N Y O r c h e s t r a ( a n d w i n d b a n d ) w o u l d l i k e to w e l c o m e a l l n e w m u s i c i a n s to C o l l e g e . C o m e to o u r s t a n d at t h e F r e s h e r s ' F a i r a n d w e ' l l t e l l y o u a l l a b o u t w h o w e a r e a n d w h a t w e d o . I f y o u ' r e n o t a m u s i c i a n , w h y n o t c o m e a l o n g to o u r first c o n c e r t a n y w a y o n 2 7 t h N o v e m b e r a t 8 : 0 0 p m i n t h e G r e a t H a l l ? A l s o , i f y o u ' d l i k e to m e e t us a n d s o m e o f t h e o t h e r m u s i c a l a s s o c i a t e s a t I C ( C h o i r a n d O p e r a t i c S o c i e t y ) t h e r e is a M u s i c F a i r at 6 :30 o n T u e s d a y 3 0 t h S e p t e m b e r i n 53 P r i n c e ' s G a t e ( j u s t o p p o s i t e t h e M e c h E n g e n t r a n c e i n E x h i b i t i o n R o a d ) to w h i c h e v e r y o n e is w e l c o m e . F i n a l l y a s h o r t n o t i c e t o o u r r e g u l a r m e m b e r s . T h e f i r s t f i v e w e e k s ' r e h e a r s a l s w i l l n o t be at t h e u s u a l t i m e s , s o p l e a s e c o m e t o t h e F r e s h e r s ' F a i r to find o u t w h e r e t h e y a r e . S e e y o u a l l o n T u e s d a y a f t e r n o o n .

Tim Jones

Dramsoc "What are these, so withered and so wild in their attire?" ( B a n q u o )

T H E I M M O R T A L B A R D c o u l d n o t h a v e d r e a m t t h a t i n t h e la te 2 0 t h C e n t u r y his w o r d s w o u l d h a v e a p p l i e d , so a p t l y , t o t h e c r e w a n d a c t o r s o f t h e I C D r a m a t i c S o c i e t y . T h e s e m o t l e y f o l k s h u f f l e a r o u n d t h e U n i o n E a s t S t a i r c a s e t i r e d a n d r e d - e y e d a f t e r a n e v e n i n g ' s w o r k o n t h e s tage o r l a t e n i g h t c a r o u s i n g i n ' T h e S t o r e r o o m ' , t h e i r w o r k s h o p t w o a n d a h a l f floors u p .

O c c a s i o n a l l y , h o w e v e r , v i t a l i t y f l o o d s t h r o u g h t h e m a n d t h e S o c i e t y p u t s o n t w o m a i n p r o ­d u c t i o n s a y e a r , a c c o m p a n i e d b y a o n e n i g h t s h o w d u r i n g R a g W e e k , a n d a t o u r i n t h e s u m m e r , e x t r a n e o u s a c t i v i t i e s o f t e n t a k e p l a c e s u c h as t h e a t r e t r i p s , a n d c o m e t h e s p r i n g , t h e a t r e w o r k s h o p sessions.

A s p o k e s m a n s p e a k s : " W e n e e d a c t o r s a n d stage c r e w , e s p e c i a l l y p e o p l e i n t e r e s t e d i n s o u n d . C o m e u p to t h e U n i o n C o n c e r t H a l l d u r i n g F r e s h e r s ' F a i r ( o r w h e n e v e r ) a n d y o u c a n h a v e a g u i d e d t o u r a n d a c u p o f t e a , y o u ' l l b e v e r y w e l c o m e . "

Brecht T H E C H R I S T M A S p r o d u c t i o n i s The Threepenny Opera b y B e r t o l d B r e c h t . A u d i t i o n s a r e o n W e d n e s d a y 1st O c t o b e r at 6 : 3 0 p m i n t h e C o n c e r t H a l l , a n d a g a i n o n S u n d a y 5 t h a t 2 : 0 0 p m . T h e s h o w w i l l b e c a s t b y t h e s e c o n d w e e k o f t e r m .

F o r f u r t h e r d e t a i l s a b o u t anything

c o m e a n d see us i n t h e S t o r e r o o m , o r i n t h e C o n c e r t h a l l at F r e s h e r s ' F a i r o r r i n g us o n i n t e r n a l 2 8 5 4 .

Graham Brand P R E S I D E N T

I M P E R I A L C O L L E G E

M U S I C F A I R T u e s d a y , 30th September , 6-8 p.m.

T H E M U S I C R O O M 53 P R I N C E ' S G A T E

( E x h i b i t i o n R o a d , opposite M e c h a n i c a l Engineering)

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IC O P E R A T I C S O C I E T Y

IC W I N D E N S E M B L E

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etc. , etc.

I C m u s i c i a n s e x t e n d a w a r m w e l c o m e to a l l w h o w o u l d l i k e to find o u t a b o u t m u s i c at I m p e r i a l C o l l e g e . N e w c o m e r s a r e p a r t i c u l a r l y w e l c o m e at th i s i n f o r m a l

s o c i a l g a t h e r i n g .

M U S I C R E F R E S H M E N T S

Bellpads & Bald ricks N O j o i n - a n d - h a v e - a - j o l l y - o l d -t i m e - w i t h - o u r - C l u b r e c r u i t m e n t this . M o r e a m e n a c e f u l d e m a n d t h a t e a c h a n d e v e r y w h o s e b o d y is a b l e a t t e n d t h e U n i o n L o w e r R e f e c t o r y o n M o n d a y s a t t h e h o u r o f six t h i r t y p i p e m m a ( a n d q u e l l t h o s e q u a l m s for it serves n o t at t h a t h o u r ) .

F o r it is u p o n t h e s i x t h d a y o f O c t o b e r t h a t E n g l i s h m e n a l l c a n d o t h e i r p a t r i o t i c d u t y a n d b e c o m e t h o r o u g h l y k n a c k e r e d , i n t h e first session o f t r a i n i n g t o w a r d s t h e f o r m a t i o n o f a M o r r i s D a n c e s i d e d e s t i n e d for w o r l d d o m i n a t i o n . U n t o l d f e r t i l i t y c a n b e y o u r s ! A s t o u n d y o u r c h u m s w i t h t h e size o f y o u r r a d i s h c r o p !

E s p e c i a l l y w e l c o m e w i l l b e m u s i c i a n s , for t h e o n e w e h a v e at t h e m o m e n t s p e n d s u n t r a d i t i o n a l l y l a r g e t r a c t s o f t i m e t o u r i n g t h e f a r - f l u n g c o r n e r s o f t h e s p h e r i c a l g l o b e .

T h o s e a m o n g s t y o u i n s o l e n t e n o u g h to ask q u e s t i o n s o f this s c h e m i n g w i l l f i n d m e f a i r l y o b v i o u s t o t h e n a k e d e y e a t F r e s h e r s ' F a i r a n d t o n i g h t ' s F o l k C l u b t h i n g y . J u s t b e c o n s i d e r a t e t o w a r d s m y b r e a t h l e s s n e s s , is a l l .

E n g l a n d E x p e c t s !

Andy Cheyne

Chess club A R E Y O U a g r a n d m a s t e r , w o o d -p u s h e r o r j u s t a b e g i n n e r ? I f so, w h y n o t j o i n t h e C h e s s C l u b ? C o m e a n d s e e o u r s t a l l a t t h e F r e s h e r s ' F a i r o r p l a y i n o u r f reshers ' l i g h t n i n g t o u r n a m e n t o n M o n d a y 6 t h O c t o b e r . T h e r e is n o e n t r y fee ( n o n - m e m b e r s w e l c o m e ) a n d p l a y b e g i n s at 6 : 3 0 p m i n t h e B r o w n C o m m i t t e e R o o m at t h e t o p o f t h e U n i o n B u i l d i n g .

T h e C l u b m e e t s e v e r y l u n c h t i m e at 1 2 : 3 0 p m ' i n t h e B r o w n C o m ­m i t t e e R o o m . W e h a v e t w o t e a m s i n t h e M i d d l e s e x C h e s s L e a g u e a n d w e f i n i s h e d t h i r d i n t h e p r e m i e r d i v i s i o n last s e a s o n , a n d for t h e last five y e a r s w e h a v e b e e n t h e L o n d o n i n t e r c o l l e g i a t e c h a m p i o n s . A c l u b c h a m p i o n s h i p flourishes t h r o u g h o u t t h e y e a r a n d c a t e r s for a l l l e v e l o f p l a y . W h y n o j o i n us?

Roger Brugge

Debsoc T H E D E B A T I N G S O C I E T Y b e l i e v e s t h a t t h i s C o l l e g e i s p r i v i l e g e d t o h a v e a D e b a t i n g S o c i e t y .

O n e o f m a n ' s m o s t c u l t i v a t e d a b i l i t i e s is his a b i l i t y to a r g u e . I h a v e n o t yet m e t a n y o n e w h o h a s

n o t t r i e d th is f o r m o f r e c r e a t i o n . Y e t f o r s o m e r e a s o n — a r g u ­

m e n t s s e e m a b i t p o i n t l e s s — n o o n e e v e r s e e m s t o g e t h i s / h e r p o i n t a c r o s s . S o t h e i d e a o f d e b a t i n g c a m e u p — a n a r g u m e n t w i t h a d i f f e r e n c e — o t h e r p e o p l e d e c i d e w h o w i n s !

W e l l , a t I C t h e D e b S o c is h o p i n g to p r e s e n t s o m e issues t h i s y e a r t h a t p e r h a p s y o u h a v e o r y o u h a v e n ' t d i s c u s s e d / a r g u e d b e f o r e . I n a l l l i k e l i h o o d y o u h a v e d i s c u s s e d t h e m , b u t w e h o p e t o r e a l l y be a b l e to b r i n g o u t t h e fact t h a t v e r y f e w o f these t h i n g s a r e ' c u t a n d d r i e d ' a n d t h a t i n t r u t h , d o n e e d r e a l c o n s i d e r a t i o n .

Badgesoc T H E U N I O N B a d g e M a c h i n e w i l l b e d e m o n s t r a t e d o n t h e B a d g e s o c s ta l l at F r e s h e r s ' F a i r . T h e m a c h i n e w o r k s b y e n c a p ­s u l a t i n g t h e d e s i g n ( o n p a p e r ) b e t w e e n a m e t a l b a s e a n d a l a y e r o f p l a s t i c , so b r i n g y o u r a r t w o r k , s l o g a n s o r m a g a z i n e c u t - o u t s , a n d p r o d u c e y o u r o w n u n i q u e b a d g e s . T h e d e s i g n s h o u l d f i t i n s i d e a 3 5 m m c i r c l e , b u t y o u ' l l n e e d s o m e s p a r e s p a c e a r o u n d t h e o u t s i d e as w e l l so best b r 4 n g t h e w h o l e p a g e . C o s t , a s t a g g e r i n g l y s m a l l 1 5 p .

FELIX, September 29, 1980 Page 9

CLUBS & SOCIETIES Underwater Club

E V E R F A N C I E D finding s u n k e n t r e a s u r e ? R a i s i n g t h e T i t a n i c ? W r e s t i n g g i a n t s q u i d ? Y e s ? W e l l , w e ' r e t h e c l u b f o r y o u !

T h e m o s t g l a m o u r o u s c l u b i n C o l l e g e , y o u c a n e a s i l y r e c o g n i s e a n I C U C d i v e r . T h e m a l e o f t h e s p e c i e s is a s t r i k i n g l y h a n d s o m e b r u t e u s u a l l y w e a r i n g a b l a c k b o b b l e h a t ( m i n u s b o b b l e o f c o u r s e ! ) , w e l l i e s a n d has a m a g ­n i f i c e n t F r e n c h a c c e n t a l a C o u s t e a u . H e c a n o f t e n b e h e a r d c o m m e n t i n g a b o u t h o w w o n d e r f u l i t is t o b e s o c l o s e t o n a t u r e ( ' n a t u r e ' b e i n g o n e o f o u r w o m e n d i v e r s w h o h a s a l o v e o f r u b b e r w e a r ! ) . T h e f e m a l e d r i v e s n o n -d i v i n g m o r t a l s t o d i s t r a c t i o n . R i s i n g m a j e s t i c a l l y f r o m t h e surf , w e t suit g l i s t e n i n g i n t h e s u n , h a i r b l o w n i n the b r e e z e she is i m m e d i ­a t e l y s u r r o u n d e d b y c r i n g i n g m a l e s b e g g i n g to c a r r y h e r l u n g s o r o t h e r ' e q u i p m e n t ' ! Y e s i n d e e d p e o p l e , j o i n I C U C a n d o b t a i n c h a r m , p e r s o n a l i t y a n d c h a r i s m a b e y o n d y o u r w i l d e s t d r e a m s !

W i t h a l l t h e f a n t a s t i c p e o p l e to l o o k a f t e r , o u r s a f e t y r e c o r d is s treets a h e a d o f t h e o t h e r a d v e n t u r e c l u b s i n C o l l e g e . It d o e s n ' t cos t t h e e a r t h to b e t r a n s f o r m e d f r o m a n o r m a l s t u d e n t i n t o a G o d - l i k e

I C U C d i v e r , w e h a v e t h e e q u i p ­m e n t , w e a l s o h a v e o u r o w n d i v e b o a t l o v i n g l y k n o w n as t h e M V C a l a p s o . I f o n t h e o t h e r h a n d y o u find t h e i d e a o f g o d - l i k e s tatus t o o h e a d y y o u c a n at least b e seen i n t h e c o m p a n y o f d i v e r s b y p l a y i n g Octopush. T h i s is a f o r m , p f u n d e r ­w a t e r h o c k e y p l a y e d i n t h e safety o f a p o o l . It d o e s n ' t r e q u i r e t o o m u c h t r a i n i n g y e t k e e p s y o u r e m a r k a b l y f i t . O u r t e a m h a s r e a c h e d t h e q u a r t e r f i n a l s o f t h e n a t i o n a l c h a m p i o n s h i p s f o r t h e p a s t f e w y e a r s , b u t w e a i m to d o b e t t e r th is y e a r . H o p e f u l l y w e w i l l a l s o f i n d t h e f e w w o m e n s t i l l n e e d e d to h a v e t h e m a k i n g s o f a g o o d w o m e n ' s t e a m .

I f y o u w a n t to h e a r m o r e a b o u t I C U C l i s t e n f o r t h e F r e n c h a c c e n t s o n t h e Q u e e n s L a w n d u r i n g F r e s h e r s ' F a i r . F o r g o d s , w e ' r e v e r y a p p r o a c h a b l e ! A l t e r ­n a t i v e l y w e a r e p u t t i n g o n a s l i d e s h o w o f u n d e r w a t e r p h o t o g r a p h y o n T u e s d a y 6 t h O c t o b e r i n Z o o l o g y . S i m p l y c o m e t o B e i t Q u a d a n d f o l l o w t h e s igns .

T h e f i r s t p o o l s e s s i o n is o n T h u r s d a y 2 n d O c t o b e r at 7 : 0 0 p m i n t h e C o l l e g e S p o r t s C e n t r e .

Andy Cameron

L A M L E Y S ESTABLISHED 1875

TECHNICAL B O O K S

LETRASET

DRAWING INSTRUMENTS

ART MATERIALS

STATIONERY

PAPERBACKS

EXHIBITION ROAD S.W.7 TEL. 01-589-1276

Pimlico C o n n e c t i o n

T H E P I M L I C O C o n n e c t i o n S o c i e t y n e e d s u n d e r g r a d u a t e t u t o r s t o h e l p t e a c h S c i e n c e , M a t h e m a t i c s , a n d E n g i n e e r i n g a t t h e P i m l i c o , S t o c k w e l l M a n o r , a n d H o l l a n d P a r k C o m p r e h e n s i v e S c h o o l s . N o p r e v i o u s e x p e r i e n c e is n e e d e d !

Tutoring — w i l l b e w i t h i n d i v i d u a l s a n d s m a l l g r o u p s . T u t o r s w o r k i n t e a m s o f t w o to f ive u n d e r t h e d i r e c t i o n o f t e a c h e r s .

Time involved — 13 :30 to 15 :30 a p p r o x i m a t e l y , e a c h W e d n e s d a y a f t e r n o o n i n t h e A u t u m n T e r m a n d f i r s t f o u r w e e k s o f t h e S p r i n g T e r m .

Subjects Taught - Science a t a l l l e v e l s , b u t m a i n l y 11 -14 y e a r o l d s . - Engineering - m a i n l y w o o d w o r k a n d m e t a l w o r k . S t u d e n t s w i t h i n d u s t r i a l w o r k s h o p p r a c t i c e u r g e n t l y n e e d e d ! -Mathematics - at a l l levels . -Electronics - m a i n l y at C S E l e v e l .

Travel Expenses — b a s e d o n t u b e fares a r e p a i d to t u t o r s .

C o n t a c t A l a n R o g e r s , E l e c E n g 3, o r l e a v e a m e s s a g e o n 9 4 0 4 4 6 6 .

I C C A G

I C C A G is t h e I m p e r i a l C o l l e g e C o m m u n i t y A c t i o n G r o u p .

T h e ' A c t i o n ' G r o u p s o u n d s a bi t d u m b b u t t h e i d e a is s i m p l e . A l o t o f p e o p l e ( e s p e c i a l l y o l d ones) d o n ' t a c t u a l l y g o to d i s c o s e v e r y five m i n u t e s , b u t d o find t h e y c a n ' t m a n a g e e a s y t h i n g s l i k e s h o p p i n g a n d g a r d e n i n g . T h e y a r e s o m e t i m e s j u s t p l a i n l o n e l y .

A lot o f p e o p l e w h o d o n ' t h a v e h o m e s - w h i c h is s o m e t h i n g w e a r e n o t e v e n s e t t i n g o u t to s t o p -h o w e v e r , as t h e y l ie i n t h e streets , as o f t e n as n o t at n i g h t s , t h e y a r e s t i l l i n n e e d o f h e l p . A c u p o f s o u p , s o m e b r e a d a n d s o m e b i s c u i t s a t a b o u t m i d n i g h t r e a l l y c a n c h e e r t h e m u p . ( A c t u a l l y t h e y a r e n ' t n o r m a l l y t h a t d e j e c t e d , b u t s o m e t i m e s t h e y a r e c o l d a n d wet . )

I ' l l s p a r e t h e d r i v e l ( m a y b e I ' v e d r i v e l l e d a l r e a d y ) , so i f y o u w o u l d l i k e to h e l p s o m e o n e (i .e . get o f f y o u r b u t t ) c o m e to o u r ' o f f i c e ' ( w h i c h is n o t ' o u r ' off ice) d u r i n g a M o n d a y l u n c h t i m e a t a b o u t 1 : 0 0 p m , t h a t ' s w h e n w e h o l d m e e t i n g s . B y t h e w a y , m y p r o o f ­r e a d e r h a s p o i n t e d o u t t h a t I h a v e n e g e l e c t e d t o d i s c l o s e t h e w h e r e ­a b o u t s o f t h e a b o v e of f ice . It 's o n t h e t o p o f t h e U n i o n B u i l d i n g , f o l l o w t h e s igns .

Dancing Club " T O D A N C E o r n o t to d a n c e ? " — t h a t is t h e q u e s t i o n . B y t h e e n d o f t h i s a r t i c l e I h o p e y o u w i l l h a v e d e c i d e d to j o i n o n e o f t h e l a r g e s t a n d m o s t a c t i v e c l u b s at I m p e r i a l

— n a m e l y t h e D a n c i n g C l u b . G e n e r a l t e a c h i n g classes s tart at

7 : 3 0 p m o n T u e s d a y s a n d W e d n e s ­d a y s for b e g i n n e r s a n d o n M o n d a y s for d a n c e r s w h o a l r e a d y k n o w t h e b a s i c s a n d w a n t to l e a r n m o r e i n t r i c a t e s t e p s . T h e l e s s o n s l a s t u n t i l 9 : 0 0 p m , a n d t h e n t h e r e is a f u r t h e r p e r i o d w h e r e p e o p l e p r a c t i c e w h a t t h e y h a v e l e a r n t i n t h e l e s s o n d u r i n g t h e g e n e r a l d a n c i n g . T h e b e g i n n e r s w i l l l e a r n a b o u t t h e m o v e m e n t a n d t h e steps i n t h e f o l l o w i n g d a n c e s : s o c i a l f o x t r o t , w a l t z , q u i c k s t e p i n t h e b a l l r o o m s e c t i o n , a n d c h a - c h a , r u m b a a n d j i v e i n t h e L a t i n s e c t i o n . A few ' p a r t y ' d a n c e s a r e a l s o t a u g h t , e .g . t h e g a y g o r d o n s , a n d t h e d a s h i n g w h i t e s e r g e a n t . T h e M o n d a y n i g h t d a n c e r s w i l l l e a r n t h e a b o v e d a n c e s a n d a l s o d a n c e s w h i c h a r e t o o d i f f i c u l t to p i c k u p e a s i l y , l i k e t h e f o x t r o t , t a n g o , s a m b a a n d p a s c i d o b l e . T h e lessons a r e t a k e n b y q u a l i f i e d t e a c h e r s .

F o r t h o s e w h o w o u l d l i k e to p r o g r e s s faster t h a n t h e g e n e r a l c lasses a l l o w , t h e r e w i l l b e t h e o p p o r t u n i t y t o t a k e d a n c i n g m e d a l s . T h e m e d a l classes ( P D T , b r o n z e a n d s i l v e r ) w i l l t a k e p l a c e

o n t h e s a m e n i g h t s as t h e g e n e r a l d a n c i n g a n d w i l l s t a r t at 6 : 3 0 p m a n d g o o n u n t i l 9 : 3 0 p m . T h e P D T ( P o p u l a r D a n c e T e s t ) is t h e first g r a d e a n d w i l l b e h e l d o n W e d n e s d a y . T h e b r o n z e m e d a l w i l l be h e l d o n T u e s d a y a n d t h e s i l v e r m e d a l o n M o n d a y . T h e P D T is o p e n to e v e r y b o d y , t h e b r o n z e a n d s i l v e r classes w i l l o n l y b e f o r t h o s e w h o h a v e d a n c e d b e f o r e . T h e classes w i l l c u l m i n a t e i n M a r c h w i t h a n e x a m i n a t i o n b y e x a m i n e r s f r o m t h e I m p e r i a l S o c i e t y o f T e a c h e r s of D a n c i n g .

A p a r t f r o m t h e r e g u l a r w e e k l y e v e n t s , t h e c l u b o r g a n i s e s a n a n n u a l C h r i s t m a s D i n n e r a n d D a n c e , t r i p s to o t h e r c o l l e g e a n d p u b l i c d a n c e s , a n d h o p e f u l l y , th is y e a r w i l l v i s i t t h e B r i t i s h D a n c i n g C h a m p i o n s h i p s . A l s o , e v e r y y e a r , t h e r e a r e t w o a n n u a l i n t e r -u n i v e r s i t y d a n c i n g c o m p e t i t i o n s . T h e c l u b e n t e r s a t e a m for these e v e n t s .

A l l i n a l l , it 's b e e n o n e h e l l o f a y e a r a n d th is o n e w i l l b e b e t t e r . S o c o m e a l o n g o n t h e s p e c i f i e d e v e n i n g s t o t h e J C R , S h e r f i e l d B u i l d i n g . I f y o u w a n t m o r e i n f o r m a t i o n p l e a s e d o n o t h e s i t a t e to c o n t a c t o n e o f t h e following p e o p l e : C h a r l i e A n g u s , C h e m w i t h M a n S c i 3 ( P r e s i d e n t ) ; S t e v e n P a l m e r , C h e m E n g 2 ( T r e a s u r e r ) ; C h r i s W a t t s , A e r o 3 ( S e c r e t a r y ) ; S i m o n C a r t e r , C h e m E n g 2 ( P u b l i c i t y ) .

Page 10 FEUX, September 29, 1980

CLUBS & SOCIETIES Afrlcarrih

A F R I C A R R I B S O C is o p e n to a l l m e m b e r s of t h e C o l l e g e w h o a r e i n t e r e s t e d i n t h e p o l i t i c a l , c u l t u r a l a n d s o c i o - e c o n o m i c d e v e l o p m e n t s i n a l l t h e O A U ( O r g a n i s a t i o n for A f r i c a n U n i t y ) a n d C a r r i b e a n c o u n t r i e s .

O u r interests a r e , h o w e v e r , n o t l i m i t e d t o t h e g e o g r a p h i c a l e n t i t i e s c o m p r i s i n g t h e C a r r i b e a n i s l a n d s a n d t h e A f r i c a n c o n t i n e n t . E v e n t s t h e w o r l d o v e r , f r o m B r a z i l to C a n a d a , f r o m L i b y a to L e s o t h o , h e r e i n t h e U n i t e d K i n g d o m , i n t h e U n i t e d S t a t e s a n d e l s e w h e r e , a r e o f e q u a l a n d p r i m a r y i n t e r e s t to us i f t h e y h a v e a n i n f l u e n c e o n t h e l e g i t i m a t e a s p i r a t i o n s o f t h e p e o p l e o f A f r i c a o r o f A f r i c a n d e s c e n t . T o t h i s e x t e n t , w e a r e o u r b r o t h e r s ' k e e p e r .

B u t w e a r e a l s o o u r o w n selves k e e p e r , first a n d foremost. T h a t ' s w h y w e w o u l d l i k e to e n c o u r a g e y o u to e n j o y y o u r s e l f w h i l e h e r e , a n d r e l a x i n o u r c o m p a n y . T h e r e a r e a n u m b e r o f R & B , s o u l , j a z z a n d r e g g a e c l u b s i n L o n d o n , b u t y o u ' r e l i k e l y to f i n d m a n y o f t h e m o n t h e e x p e n s i v e s i d e . I f y o u a r e a n ' a v e r a g e ' s t u d e n t , y o u w o n ' t be a b l e to p a t r o n i s e t h e c o m m e r c i a l m u s i c p l a c e s as o f t e n as y o u m a y w i s h . S o w h y n o t d r o p i n o n y o u r v e r y o w n S o c i e t y ' s d i s c o sessions, f i l m a n d s l i d e s h o w s , o r t h e l i v e l y l u n c h - h o u r , s o u l - t o - s o u l c h a t s ? W e ' l l set t h e b a l l r o l l i n g w i t h a r e c e p t i o n for y o u n e x t w e e k e n d . T h e r e ' s eats a n d d r i n k s , k n o w -t h y - b r o t h e r c h a t s , a n d a s c r e e n i n g o f t h e S e n e g a l e s e S e m b e n e O u s -m a n e ' s f i l m Xala. I t ' s a l l h a p p e n i n g i n R o o m 4 0 8 , E l e c E n g b u i l d i n g o n F r i d a y 1 0 t h O c t o b e r f r o m 5 : 3 0 p m o n w a r d s . A n d i t 's a l l f ree !

O t h e r t o p i c s of i n t e r e s t follow l a t e r i n t h e t e r m . L i k e Z i m b a b w e . T h e g u e r r i l l a w a r is o v e r . L a n c a s t e r H o u s e is b a c k at St J a m e s ' s . L o r d S o a m e s h a s a n o t h e r t i t l e . B u t , h o w fares Z i m b a b w e ? W h a t a r e t h e p r o s p e c t s for, a n d c o n s t r a i n t s o n , a d v a n c e m e n t ? W e h o p e t o h a v e s o m e o n e o f s u b s t a n c e f r o m t h e n e w Z i m b a b w e H i g h C o m ­m i s s i o n b e f o r e l o n g , o n a l e c t u r e w i t h q u e s t i o n a n d a n s w e r sess ion . L a t e r t h e r e ' s s e m i n a r s , l e c t u r e s , d e b a t e s . O n W a l t e r R o d n e y , o n t h e N o r t h - S o u t h d i a l o g u e , o n A r a b - A f r i c a a n d P a n - A f r i c a n i s m s i n c e N a s s e r , o n t h e e c o n o m i c s o f l i b e r a t i o n f r o m a T a n z a n i a n p e r s p e c t i v e , o n H u m a n R i g h t s , a n d o f c o u r s e , o n S o u t h A f r i c a ' s a p a r t h e i d .

Latin American

T H E I C L a t i n A m e r i c a n S o c i e t y w o u l d l i k e to g i v e a l l f reshers a v e r y w a r m w e l c o m e to I m p e r i a l C o l l e g e . W e h o p e to see y o u at t h e F r e s h e r s ' F a i r w h e r e w e s h a l l h a v e a s t a n d . J o i n us t h e r e .

Hellenic

K A L O S O R I S A T E ! ( w e l c o m e ) T h e H e l l e n i c S o c i e t y o f I C exists to p r o m o t e t h e G r e e k c u l t u r e i n B r i t a i n a n d t h u s h e l p to c r e a t e a f r i e n d l y e n v i r o n m e n t b e t w e e n o u r p e o p l e s . I t a l s o e x i s t s t o h e l p G r e e k a n d C y p r i o t n e w c o m e r s w i t h t h e i r p r o b l e m s .

D u r i n g t h e y e a r it o r g a n i s e s c u l t u r a l e v e n t s , s p e e c h e s , p a r t i e s w i t h G r e e k w i n e a n d m u s i c a n d n u m e r o u s g a t h e r i n g s o f G r e e k i n t e r e s t . T h e S o c i e t y a l s o p u b l i s h e s its o w n n e w s p a p e r ( A e s o p ) w h i c h is u n f o r t u n a t e l y p r i n t e d i n G r e e k .

F o r f u r t h e r i n f o r m a t i o n c o m e to o u r s t a n d a t t h e F r e s h e r s ' F a i r a n d c h a t w i t h us.

Baha'l

T H E P U R P O S E O f B a h a ' i S o c i e t y is to p r o v i d e o p p o r t u n i t i e s for t h e s t u d y a n d d i s c u s s i o n o f t h e B a h a ' i f a i t h t h r o u g h l e c t u r e s , i n f o r m a l m e e t i n g s a n d s t u d y classes , f i l m s a n d s o c i a l a c t i v i t i e s .

S o m e b a s i c p r i n c i p l e s o f t h e B a h a ' i f a i t h a r e :

T h e O n e n e s s o f M a n k i n d . T h e O n e n e s s o f R e l i g i o n . T h e U n f e t t e r e d S e a r c h after T r u t h . A W o r l d C o m m o n w e a l t h . W o r l d P e a c e . T h e R e l i n q u i s h i n g o f P r e j u d i c e s . A U n i v e r s a l A u x i l l i a r y L a n g u a g e . E q u a l Status for M e n a n d W o m e n . T h e H a r m o n y o f R e l i g i o n & S c i e n c e . U n i v e r s a l E d u c a t i o n .

A n e x h i b i t i o n o n t h e B a h a ' i f a i t h w i l l be d i s p l a y e d a t t h e F r e s h e r s ' F a i r .

R Karia C C D 2

Red Cross

T H E D E T A C H M E N T a t I C w a s f o r m e d i n 1 9 7 7 a n d p r o v i d e s t r a i n i n g i n first a i d a n d n u r s i n g for staf f a n d s t u d e n t s o f t h e C o l l e g e .

It exists as a u n i f o r m e d g r o u p o f q u a l i f i e d m e m b e r s w h o a r e p r e ­p a r e d to g i v e a s m a l l a m o u n t o f I h e i r t i m e t o t h e B r i t i s h R e d C r o s s , a n d to b e a v a i l a b l e i n t h e e v e n t o f l o c a l o r n a t i o n a l e m e r -g e n c v .

W e a r e f o r t u n a t e i n h a v i n g a n a m b u l a n c e b a s e d w i t h t h e D e t a c h ­m e n t h e r e a t C o l l e g e w h i c h is u s e d for R e d C r o s s d u t i e s , o f t e n t r a v e l l i n g l o n g d i s t a n c e s e s c o r t i n g t h e s ick a n d i n f i r m . T h i s v e h i c l e is a l s o r e a d i l y a v a i l a b l e to assist at a n y a c c i d e n t w i t h i n t h e C o l l e g e a n d t w o C o l l e g e m e m b e r s a r e a l w a y s o b t a i n a b l e o n t h e C o l l e g e b l e e p s i n s u c h a n e v e n t .

II y o u w o u l d l i k e f u r t h e r d e t a i l s o f t h e r a n g e o f t r a i n i n g a v a i l a b l e a n d t h e c o n d i t i o n s o f m e m b e r s h i p o f t h e R e d C r o s s , p l e a s e c o n t a c t : R o g e r S e r p e l l , C o m m a n d a n t c / o A e r o D e p t . S e e u s a t t h e a m b u l a n c e at F r e s h e r s ' F a i r .

Hams

W H O O R W H A T is G 4 C T P ? W a s F r a n c i s B a c o n t h e first R a d i o A m a t e u r ? D o e s t h e a e t h e r exist? Y o u m a y w e l l a s k ! W h a t is a r a d i o - c o n t r o l l e d p u b c r a w l ? W h a t is it l ike to t a l k to p e o p l e o n t h e o t h e r s i d e o f t h e w o r l d ? H a m s o c w i l l a n s w e r y o u r q u e s t i o n s .

H a m s o c is t h e I m p e r i a l C o l l e g e A m a t e u r R a d i o S o c e i t y (to be

distinguished from IC Radio, the campus radio broadcasting station -Ed) a n d f r o m o u r e y r i e G 5 Y C , G 8 E Y C , a n d o c c a s i o n a l G B 2 I C s e n d e m a n a t i o n s to a l l c o r n e r s o f t h e g l o b e . W a v e l e n g t h s f r o m 8 0 m d o w n to m i c r o w a v e s a r e e m p l o y e d b y o u r l i c e n s e d m e m b e r s for th is p u r p o s e . F o r n o v i c e s H a m s o c w i l l g i v e e x p e r t c o a c h i n g i n t h e i n t r i c a c i e s of O h m ' s L a w o r . i n t h e s t r a i g h t f o r w a r d d o u b l e c o n v e r s i o n s u p e r h e t e r o d y n e p r i n c i p l e . F i n d o u t t h e d i f f e r e n c e b e t w e e n s k i p a n d c h i r p a n d pass t h e R A E ! I f this is n o t e n o u g h H A M S O C w i l l b e a r r a n g i n g a series o f s t i m u l a t i n g t a l k s a n d w e w i l l s t u n y o u w i t h o u r s o c i a l a c t i v i t i e s — r e m e m b e r t h e a n n u a l d i n n e r ?

F i n d o u t m o r e at t h e F r e s h e r s ' F a i r — c o m e u p a n d s e e o u r e q u i p m e n t !

P.G. Group

T H E R E W I L L b e a p o s t g r a d u a t e G r o u p s t a l l a t F r e s h e r s ' F a i r w h e r e , T r e a s u r e r p e r m i t t i n g , t h e r e w i l l b e s o m e ' r e a l ' r e f r e s h ­m e n t s .

T h e P G G r o u p is b o t h a s o c i a l a n d a c a m p a i g n i n g b a n d o f p e o p l e b u t , o b v i o u s l y , n e i t h e r r o l e c a n b e f u l f i l l e d i f it is left to j u s t t h e ' D y n a m i c F i v e ' , y o u r c o m ­m i t t e e . It w o n ' t t a k e y o u l o n g to find o u t t h a t t h e P G s d o n ' t get q u i t e t h e best d e a l i n C o l l e g e so c o m e a l o n g a n d m e e t t h e g r o u p w h o s h o u l d b e d o i n g s o m e t h i n g a b o u t i t .

T H E C H A P L A I N C Y serves t h r e e c o l l e g e s i n a l l : I m p e r i a l C o l l e g e , Q u e e n E l i z a b e t h C o l l e g e a n d t h e R o y a l C o l l e g e o f M u s i c . T h e C h a p l a i n c y i n c l u d e s m e m b e r s f r o m m a n y d e n o m i n a t i o n s : B a p t i s t , A n g l i c a n , M e t h o d i s t U R C a n d o t h e r s , a n d is l e d t h i s y e a r b y a S c o t t i s h E p i s c o p a l i a n . T h e f o c a l p o i n t o f e a c h w e e k ' s a c t i v i t i e s is t h e c o m m u n i o n s e r v i c e c e l e b r a t e d e v e r y S u n d a y at 1 0 : 0 0 a m i n t h e C o n s o r t G a l l e r y , S h e r f i e l d B u i l d i n g , b u t t h e C h a p l a i n c y a l s o m e e t s i n m a n y s m a l l g r o u p s i n C o l l e g e h a l l s , h o u s e s a n d d e p a r t m e n t s . A v e r y f r i e n d l y a t m o s p h e r e is a i d e d b y s o c i a l e v e n t s t h r o u g h o u t t h e y e a r i n c l u d i n g b a r n d a n c e s , p a r t i e s , a n d w e e k e n d s o u t o f L o n d o n .

H e r e a r e t h e d e t a i l s o f s o m e

Gays

P E O P L E w h o a r e n e r v o u s a b o u t i n v o l v i n g t h e m s e l v e s i n t h e C o l l e g e G a y s o c , a n d I k n o w t h e f e e l i n g f r o m p e r s o n a l e x p e r i e n c e , m a y f i n d t h e f o l l o w i n g o r g a n ­i s a t i o n s h e l p f u l :

Gay Switchboard: 0 1 - 8 3 7 - 7 3 2 4 . G i v e s i n f o r m a t i o n , h e l p a n d a d v i c e o n a l m o s t a n y t h i n g . A l w a y s o p e n .

Icebreakers: 0 1 - 2 7 4 - 9 5 9 0 . A g a y c o u n s e l l i n g o r g a n i s a t i o n w h i c h w i l l t a l k o v e r p e r s o n a l p r o b l e m s o f g a y s , b i s e x u a l s , a n d p e o p l e u n c e r t a i n , a n d w i l l i n t r o d u c e y o u at m e e t i n g s to o t h e r p e o p l e i n t h e s a m e p o s i t i o n .

Lesbian Line: 0 1 - 7 9 4 - 2 9 4 2 . I n f o r m ­a t i o n a n d a d v i c e for w o m e n . R i n g i n t h e e v e n i n g .

London Friend: 0 1 - 3 5 9 - 7 3 7 1 o r c a l l

at 2 7 4 U p p e r S t , I s l i n g t o n b e t w e e n

7 : 3 0 p m a n d 1 0 : 3 0 p m . A d v i c e a n d

h e l p o n a n y p r o b l e m , i n c l u d i n g

m a r r i e d g a y s .

Quest: A c a t h o l i c g r o u p f o r h o m o s e x u a l m e n a n d w o m e n . C o n t a c t t h e s e c r e t a r y at 8 D S o u t h P a r k R o a d , L o n d o n , S W 1 9 8 S T .

Metropolitan Community Church: A C h r i s t i a n g r o u p , c o n t a c t L e o N o r t h o n 0 1 - 5 9 2 - 0 0 8 5 .

Jewish Gay Group: C o n t a c t N o r m a n G o l d n e r , 5 S t M a r y ' s A v e , L o n d o n N 3 1 S N .

I f y o u loose t h e n u m b e r j u s t l o o k it u p i n t h e d i r e c t o r y o r ask t h e o p e r a t o r for t h e n u m b e r o f G a y S w i t c h b o a r d . T h e i m p o r t a n t t h i n g to r e m e m b e r is t h a t b e i n g b i s e x u a l o r g a y is N O T t h e e n d o f t h e w o r l d . It 's t h e start o f a n e w w o r l d . U L U G a y s o c m e e t i n g s a r e h e l d e v e r y T h u r s d a y f r o m 8 : 0 0 p m i n t h e U L U B u i l d i n g , M a l e t S t r e e t ; t h e r o o m n u m b e r is o n t h e n o t i c e b o a r d a t t h e e n t r a n c e t o U L U .

Bob Rigby C H A I R M A N , I C G A Y S O C

C h a p l a i n c y a c t i v i t i e s i n t h e n e a r f u t u r e :

O n S a t u r d a y 1 1 t h O c t o b e r t h e r e is a P i e s , P e a s a n d P a r t y N i g h t . T h i s i n c l u d e s a s l i d e s h o w to i n t r o d u c e F r e s h e r s to C h a p l a i n c y l i fe .

O n F r i d a y 1 7 t h O c t o b e r t h e r e w i l l b e a w e e k e n d o u t o f t o w n at F r a n h a m R o y a l .

I f y o u w o u l d l i k e f u r t h e r i n f o r m a t i o n a b o u t t h e C h a p l a i n c y i n I m p e r i a l C o l l e g e p l e a s e c o n t a c t t h e S t u d e n t L e a d e r B r y a n S t e e l e ( C h e m E n g 3) o r o n e o f t h e C h a p l a i n s , D a v i d A s h f o r t h , B o b B r o o k e , J a c q u e l i n e F o x a n d M a r t i n F o r w a r d . T h e r e is s o m e o n e i n t h e C h a p l a i n ' s O f f i c e i n 10 P r i n c e ' s G a r d e n s ( int 4221) e v e r y a f t e r n o o n w i l l i n g to m a k e y o u a c u p o f t e a o r cof fee .

W e s t L o n d o n C h a p l a i n c y

FEUX, September 29, 1980 Page 11

STOIC D I D Y O U R E A L I S E that I m p e r i a l C o l l e g e is o n e o f t h e few c o l l e g e s i n this c o u n t r y to possess its o w n s t u d e n t t e l e v i s i o n n e t w o r k ? S T O I C ( S t u d e n t T e l e v i s i o n O f I m p e r i a l C o l l e g e ) w a s f o r m e d t e n y e a r s a g o to p r o v i d e a n e w s a n d i n f o r m a t i o n s e r v i c e to I C s t u d e n t s . W e b r o a d ­c a s t s e v e r a l t i m e s e a c h w e e k to T V sets l o c a t e d i n t h e J u n i o r C o m m o n R o o m , t h e S o u t h s i d e T V L o u n g e a n d S o u t h s i d e , B e i t a n d L i n s t e a d H a l l s .

N e w s - B r e a k is o u r w e e k l y n e w s ­m a g a z i n e p r o g r a m m e c o v e r i n g a w i d e v a r i e t y o f t o p i c s a n d e v e n t s . U s i n g o u r p o r t a b l e c a m e r a a n d v i d e o r e c o r d e r , w e g o ' o u t a n d a b o u t ' to c o v e r t h e m a n y L J n i o n a n d R a g e v e n t s , s u c h as M o r p h y D a y , o n e o f t h e U n i o n ' s m o r e r i o t o u s o c c a s i o n s .

A r e g u l a r f e a t u r e o f ' N e w s -B r e a k ' is t h e f i l m r e v i e w , w h e r e n e w r e l e a s e s a r e p r e v i e w e d . S T O I C h a s c o n n e c t i o n s w i t h a l l t h e m a j o r f i l m d i s t r i b u t o r s , a n d m e m b e r s r e g u l a r l y a t t e n d p r e ­r e l e a s e s c r e e n i n g s to n e w f i l m s . W e a l s o o b t a i n a l a r g e n u m b e r o f s t i l l s a n d c l i p s f o r o u r ' F i l m R e v i e w ' s p o t .

S T O I C uses t h e f a c i l i t i e s of t h e c o l l e g e T V s t u d i o , w h e r e m e m b e r s c a n p e r f o r m a v a r i e t y o f t e c h n i c a l a n d n o n - t e c h n i c a l jobs : d i r e c t i n g , p r o d u c i n g , p r e s e n t i n g , n e w s r e p o r t e r , a r c h i v i s t , c a m e r a m a n , s o u n d e n g i n e e r , v i s i o n c o n t r o l l e r , v i d e o t a p e e d i t o r / o p e r a t o r , a n d m a n y , m a n y m o r e .

I f y o u w a n t to find o u t m o r e a b o u t S T O I C , t h e n c o m e a l o n g a n d see us at t h e F r e s h e r s ' F a i r , o r d r o p i n t o t h e T V S t u d i o , just o f f t h e E l e c E n g W a l k w a y a n y t i m e , o r p h o n e ( o n t h e i n t e r n a l p h o n e ) 2 6 3 7 .

I f y o u a r e n o t at F r e s h e r s ' F a i r , h e r e ' s h o w to m e e t S T O I C : Wed­

nesday lit October, 2:00pm-8:00pm,

w e a r e m a k i n g t h e f i r s t N e w s -B r e a k of t h e sess ion; c o m e a n d w a t c h ; Thursday 2nd October,

5:45pm, ' W e l c o m e to S T O I C -

a n i n f o r m a l e v e n i n g w h e r e y o u c a n find o u t m o r e a b o u t S T O I C , h o w it s t a r t e d a n d w h a t it does ; Tuesday 7th October, 5:45pm,Train-i n g S e s s i o n — c o m e a l o n g i f y o u w a n t to l e a r n h o w to o p e r a t e t h e e q u i p m e n t o r find o u t a b o u t a n y o f t h e j o b s l i s t e d .

A n d d o n ' t f o r g e t t o w a t c h N e w s - B r e a k e a c h T h u r s d a y a t 1 : 0 0 p m a n d 6 : 0 0 p m . D e t a i l s o f N e w s - B r e a k a n d a l l o t h e r p r o ­g r a m m e s w i l l b e a d v e r t i s e d a r o u n d the c o l l e g e . R e m e m b e r : it 's Y O U R l o c a l ' T V s e r v i c e .

IC RADIO I C R A D I O is L o n d o n ' s o n l y b r o a d c a s t i n g s t u d e n t r a d i o s t a t i o n . It b r o a d c a s t s o n 3 0 1 m / 9 9 9 k H z o n m e d i u m w a v e to a l l t h e S o u t h s i d e H a l l s , L i n s t e a d H a l l a n d G a r d e n H a l l . E v e n i f y o u d o n ' t l i v e i n o n e o f these p l a c e s y o u c a n st i l l h e a r us; t h e r e a r e o u t l e t s i n t h e J C R ( w h i c h r e c e i v e s p r o g r a m m e s o n T u e s d a y a n d T h u r s d a y l u n c h t i m e s ) a n d i n the c o l l e g e b a r s , p a r t i c u l a r l y S t a n ' s B a r i n S o u t h s i d e .

E i g h t y h o u r s o f p r o g r a m m e s a r e b r o a d c a s t e a c h w e e k , c e n t r e d a r o u n d m u s i c ( m u c h o f w h i c h is r e q u e s t e d b y t h e a u d i e n c e ) w i t h a s t r o n g f l a v o u r o f c o l l e g e n e w s a n d g e n e r a l i n f o r m a t i o n o f s t u d e n t i n t e r e s t .

I C R a d i o is a l w a y s o n t h e l o o k o u t f o r w i l l i n g n e w s t a f f . W h e t h e r y o u w a n t to be a p r e s e n t e r ( D J ? ) , a n e w s r e a d e r , a n e n g i n e e r o r j u s t h e l p o u t t h e n p e r h a p s y o u ' d l i k e to v i s i t t h e s t a t i o n . It is s i t u a t e d b e n e a t h K e o g h H a l l i n S o u t h s i d e next to t h e S o u t h s i d e S h o p . Y o u ' l l be t r a i n e d h o w to use t h e e q u i p m e n t i n a p r o f e s s i o n a l m a n n e r , a n d y o u ' l l be s u r p r i s e d h o w q u i c k l y y o u get ' O n A i r ' .

Y o u w i l l a l s o find us at F r e s h e r s ' F a i r t o m o r r o w , i n t h e S h e r f i e l d L o w e r R e f e c t o r y , o r y o u c a n c o m e a l o n g t o o u r F r e s h e r s ' M e e t i n g o n W e d n e s d a y 1st O c t ­o b e r . It s tarts at 7 : 3 0 p m i n I C R a d i o ' s S t u d i o 2, w h i c h is i n t h e b a s e m e n t o f 10 P r i n c e ' s G a r d e n s .

ENTS GIG CLASSIX NOUVEAUX This Tuesday, Concert Hall, starts 8:00pm.

£1.20 (or £1.00 with WUS badge).

C&G ENTS GIG Thursday 2nd October, the Portraits and John Dowle at 7:00pm In the

Union Concert Hall. Great value at only a quid.

University o f L o n d o n

Union

W E L C O M E T O L O N D O N ! A s a m e m b e r o f I m p e r i a l C o l l e g e S t u d e n t s ' U n i o n y o u a r e a u t o ­m a t i c a l l y a m e m b e r o f U L U . T h i s m e a n s t h a t y o u a r e a m e m b e r o f a u n i q u e o r g a n i s a t i o n a n d the largest s t u d e n t s ' u n i o n i n B r i t i a n . O n l y i n U L U d o y o u h a v e t h e o p p o r t u n i t y to d a n c e , d e b a t e o r s w i m w i t h m e m b e r s o f a n y o f t h e o t h e r 41 c o l l e g e s a n d s c h o o l s o f t h e U n i v e r s i t y .

T h e U L U B u i l d i n g is a m e e t i n g p l a c e w h i c h p r o v i d e s a v a s t s e l e c t i o n o f a m e n i t i e s a n d s e r v i c e s . T h e U n i m a r t S h o p has s o m e o f t h e lowest p r i c e s i n t o w n — a n d i n L o n d o n t h a t ' s w o r t h k n o w i n g . T h e f a c i l i t i e s i n c l u d e a b a r , r e f e c t o r y a n d s n a c k b a r w i t h a r o o f g a r d e n . I n t h e s u m m e r , g y m s w i m m i n g p o o l , s q u a s h c o u r t , t r a i n i n g r o o m , b a d m i n t o n c o u r t , T V r o o m , g a m e s r o o m , d a y n u r s e r y , t h e a t r e w o r k s h o p — a n d m u c h m o r e . T h e U n i v e r s i t y - w i d e S p o r t s C l u b s a n d S o c i e t i e s c a t e r for e v e r y o n e — f r o m t h e a d v e n t t u r o u s m o u n t a i n e e r to t h e g i f t e d s o p r a n o , f r o m t h e b a d m i n t o n b e g i n n e r to t h e O l y m p i c r u n n e r f r o m t h e i n t e r e s t e d a c t i v i s t to t h e p o l i t i c a l h a c k . M a k e s u r e y o u get y o u r c o p y o f T i m e O u t L o n d o n S t u d e n t G u i d e for m o r e d e t a i l s — a v a i l a b e free o f c h a r g e .

U L U W e e k w i l l be f r o m 6 t h to 1 2 t h O c t o b e r w h e n a l l s t u d e n t s , a r e i n v i t e d to c o m e a n d f i n d o u t m o r e a b o u t t h e i r i n t e r c o l l e g i a t e U n i o n . T h e c l u b s a n d societ ies w i l l be o r g a n i s i n g lots o f a c t i v i t i e s ( a n d r e c r u i t i n g m e m b e r s , o f c o u r s e ) a n d d o n ' t forget t h e B a l l o n t h e 11th .

T h e U L U B u i l d i n g is i n M a l e t S t r e e t o p p o s i t e D i l l o n s B o o k s h o p a n d u p t h e r o a d f r o m t h e B r i t i s h M u s e u m . ( G o o d g e S t , E u s t o n S q , a n d R u s s e l l S q t u b e s . )

T h i s y e a r U L U h a s t h r e e s a b b a t i c a l of f icers , e l e c t e d at t h e A n n u a l A s s e m b l y o f i t s t h r e e g o v e r n i n g c o u n c i l s : S p o r t s , S o c i e t i e s a n d t h e S t u d e n t s R e p r e s e n t a t i v e C o u n c i l . T h e S t u d e n t s R e p r e s e n t a t i v e C o u n c i l is m a d e u p o f d e l e g a t e s f r o m e v e r y c o l l e g e . T h e y m e e t r e g u l a r l y , f o r m p o l i c y for a l l t h e U n i v e r s i t y ' s s t u d e n t s a n d m a k e r e p r e s e n t a t i o n s to t h e U n i v e r s i t y .

I C s e n d s e i g h t d e l e g a t e s to t h e S t u d e n t s R e p r e s e n t a t i v e C o u n c i l . S i x o f these w i l l be e l e c t e d f r o m t h e 2 n d U G M a n d E x t e r n a l A f f a i r s C o m m i t t e e . T h e S t u d e n t s ' R e p r e ­s e n t a t i v e C o u n c i l r e p r e s e n t s y o u r v i e w s to t h e U n i v e r s i t y S e n a t e so it is u p to y o u to v o t e a n d to b e r e p r e s e n t e d a t U L U S R C a n d w i t h i n t h e U n i v e r s i t y . P a p e r s for S R C d e l e g a t e s a r e u p i n t h e L o w e r L o u n g e . I f y o u w a n t a n y m o r e i n f o r m a t i o n p l e a s e c o n t a c t J P a s s m o r e , U n i o n O f f i c e , I n t e r n a l 3915 .

N'oubliez pas le UGM in the Great Hall. Kick off 1:00pm, Thursday 2nd October.

r

What's on J

Monday, September 29 •Guilds Reception, 2:00pm, Union Concert Hall.

• R C S Freshers' U G M , 2:00pm, Great Hall. • U L U Swimming Club, 6:30-7:30pm, ULU, Malet St. •Folk Club, present Muckram Wakes, 8:00pm, Union Lower Refectory, price £1 to non-members; 50p to mombers (membership £1).

Tuesday, September 30 •Guilds U G M , 12:45pm, Mech Eng 2^0. • F r e s h e r s ' F a i r , ,2 :00pm, U n i o n Building, Sherfield, Queen's Lawn (see insert). • Music Fair , 6:00-8:00pm, Music Room, 53 Princes Gate. • E N T S F r e s h e r s ' G i g , Classix Noiiveaux, 8:00pm, Union Concert Hall, price £1.20 (or £1 with WUS badge).

•Rag Committee Meeting, 6:30pm. Brown Committee Room (top of Union Building). All soc reps piease attend, a n y o n e e l se i n t e r e s t e d in R a g welcome. Most important item for

discussion is Rag Week and also organising Tiddlywinks.

Wednesday, October 1 •Sports Trials, 12:30pm, meet Union Lower Lounge for trials at Hariington. •Guilds Women's Reception, 7:30pm, Guilds Union Office. • R C S P u b C r a w l , 6 :30pm, meet Stan's Bar.

Thursday, October 2 • IC U G M , first of term, 1:00pm, Great Hal l , admiss ion F R E E and FREE balloons. •Lunch-hour Concert, 1:30pm, The Coull String Quartet, Music Room, 53 Princes Gate. • E N T S Film, Capricorn One, 6:30pm, Mech Eng 220, price 40p. •Guilds Ents Concert, Portraits and John Dowie, 7:00pm, Union Concert Hall, price £1.

•Bedford College Folk Club, Ceilidh with Ryegrass, 8:00pm, admission 50p. •Kings College Folk Club, Cei.idh, 8:00pm, Macadam Building, Surrey St.

Page 12 FEUX, September 29, 1980

REVIEWS Records

C l u e s - R o b e r t P a l m e r

Island ILPS 9595 R O B E R T P A L M E R , whilst always producing good and sometimes original material has n e v e r real ly b e c o m e v e r y p o p u l a r in this country. This album will do little to change t h a t . P a l m e r h a s f o u n d a n e w t o y — electronics. H e has also found a new friend. G a r y N u m a n wrote two of the tracks and appears on one.

T h e album starts with ' L o o k i n g F o r Clues ' , an upbeat tune that combines Palmer's voice with some fairly funky electronic backing. ' S u l k y G i r l ' f o l l o w s w h i c h d r o p s t h e e l e c t r o n i c s to p r o d u c e a r u n - o f - t h e - m i l l Robert Palmer rock and roll song. W e are then treated to the rose a m o n g the thorns: 'Johnny and Mary ' . A n excellent track by anyone's standards, and also a good single. After that the album is basically not worth listening to, apart from perhaps ' W o k e U p L a u g h i n g ' o n s i d e t w o . N o t e v e n G a r y N u m a n can save it. T h e tracks he wrote are probably the most boring.

Robert Palmer with this album has tried to keep up with the times, but apart from the one track, 'Johnny and Mary ' , which is a classic, he has failed.

D r a m a - Y e s

Atlantic K50736 IN T H E past Y e s have had the knack of p r o d u c i n g a l b u m s w h i c h s o u n d e d a l m o s t exactly like all of their predecessors, but still selling millions of them. That was the Y e s with J o n A n d e r s o n as lead vocalist, and for the m o s t p a r t w i t h R i c k W a k e m a n o n keyboards. However , Y e s have changed and p e r h a p s the new g r o u p s h o u l d real ly be called Yuggles. Geoff D o w n e s and T r e v o r H o r n , the m a s t e r m i n d s b e h i n d B u g g i e s , stepped in to replace Messrs W a k e m a n and A n d e r s o n and most, including myself, were e x p e c t i n g a n e w s o u n d i n g Y e s . T o o u r surprise and perhaps disappointment, Y e s sound the same today as they ever did.

T h e album Drama consists of a mere six tracks, and even then one of them is less than three minutes long. T h e opening track, 'Machine Messiah' , reminds me a lot of some parts of Floyd's Wish You Were Here. ' D o e s It Really H a p p e n ' is the other major track on side one. It's a typical fast moving Y e s track, which has some nice touches on keyboards w h i c h p o s s i b l y a r e t h e b e s t W a k e m a n impersonations I have heard.

T h e album has several good and several bad points. T h e production is excellent and the m u s i c is g e n e r a l l y q u i t e a c c e s s i b l e . However the lyrics are still very bland and despite a considerable effort, T r e v o r H o r n ' s vocals are not quite of the same calibre of A n d e r s o n . T h e album cover , itself a work of art, is taken yet again from a Roger D e a n painting. Al l in all the package looks like a n o t h e r Y e s a l b u m . M e s s r s D o w n e s a n d H o r n have been integrated totally and Y e s h a v e p r o d u c e d an a l b u m that will p l e a s e many a Y e s fan.

One Trick Pony - Paul Simon

Warner Bros — K56846 IT H A S been five years since Paul S imon released his last original album, Still Crazy After All These Years, a n d it was with interest I listened to this, his first album on Warner Bros . T h e songs were written in 1978/9 for a film ' O n e T r i c k Pony ' , which stars Paul Simon. In the five years since his last release, Simon's musical style has barely changed.

Films

What the Swedish Butler Saw (Cineccnta)

T H E P U B L I C I T Y claims that this is the first 3 - D p o r n o f i lm e v e r m a d e , a n d to m y knowledge, which, in these matters, is not extensive, it is.

A t £3.20 a go, including the disposable (not to be used twice, etc. . . ) 3-D glasses, the film is hardly recommendable .

T o be blunt, the film is not only unerotic, but the d i r e c t o r , it s e e m s , a l m o s t total ly forgot he was filming in three dimensions. In fact, save sixty seconds of dreaming by 'our hero' when naked ladies were seen swimming out of the screen, with arms and legs flailing, on a black background, my expectations of the use of three dimensional photography to complement the standard 'sex' movie went sadly unfulfilled.

S e t in a n E d w a r d i a n c l i m a t e , the fi lm outlines the progress to sexual competence a n d ful f i lment of ' o u r h e r o ' . T h e s e x u a l competence bit is attained in Diana D o r s ' b r o t h e l (yes I'm s o r r y ! ) , t h o u g h he f inds there is still something missing, 'a thing called love'. T h e answer to this, apparently, is to forcibly rape, using all the electrical mod-cons at your disposal, the first demure and respectable young lady you meet. In this case, the demure and respectable young lady is some girl he meets in the National Gallery, a n d a l l t h e e l e c t r i c a l m o d - c o n s at h i s disposal, is a r o o m , unfortunately named the 'snuggery', with such devices as a Chinese tickler (a hand-wound device with a feather on the end which could be directed a n y w h e r e . . . . .), the world's first, though I'm sure there are many now, electrically operated pulsating f l o u r e s c e n t d i l d o a n d a v e r y d e v i o u s e x a m i n a t i o n c o u c h . N e e d l e s s to s a y , together with too m u c h ill-conceived comedy ,

O n e Trick Pony is a very mellow album, that will probably go d o w n best late at night.

If you like the Paul S i m o n laid back style, then this is an album for y o u . These songs g e t b e t t e r t h e m o r e y o u h e a r t h e m However , if y o u are a newcomer to P a u l . Simon's solo work then I would not r e c o m m e n d it a s it is t o o l a i d b a c k a n d it l a c k s immediacy.

Dave Fuller Records courtesy of IC Radio.

he has his wicked way with her only to find that she's the sexual athlete, not him.

T h e Swedish Butler comes straight from the M u p p e t S h o w and his main role, other than keeping what's-her-name's chaperone b u s y in the k i t c h e n ( w a t c h for the awful vegetable insinuations), is to a d d the word Swedish and all it's connotations to the title.

O h yes, there's the ghost (?) of J a c k the R i p p e r w h o g o e s a r o u n d a l m o s t s t a b b i n g everyone in the back.

A n d now the glowing report

F I N A L L Y I made it, my ambition to mix my first 3-D movie with my weekly porno film, and I was not disappointed.

A t 30p, the snug fitting glasses were a good bargain, and we were allowed to keep t h e m a n d t h o u g h we w e r e i n f o r m e d that they were not sunglasses, 1 a m sure I can put them to good use.

T h e d i r e c t o r not o n l y u s e d the t h r e e dimensional effects beautifully, but continued to use his delicious models in a way that was both subtle and erotic.

It was g o o d to see Diana D o r s , still looking as ravishing as ever, playing the part of the brothel 'madame' and treating 'our hero' and us to all sorts of exciting positions from the K a m a Sutra .

T h e main plot, however, revolved around the stud trying to seduce a stunning beautiful virginal maiden he met, quite by chance, in the National Gal lery.

A f t e r c o n s i d e r a b l e e f f o r t i n v o l v i n g numerous electric devices, serving only to whet our appetite, we were treated to her marvellous body, as she stood strapped to the wall!

T h o u g h I could write o n for hours, I think I s h o u l d leave it to y o u to e x p e r i e n c e this delightful adventure.

Simon Middelboe

The Discreet Charm

of the Bourgeoisie

Showing at the Minema, Knightsbridge, until October 15th, this film is an excellent example of the work of the French director Luis Bunuel. Bril l iantly funny, the film offers a satirical , slightly surrealistic view of the lives of a select group of rich friends, plotting their course from dinner party to dinner party through such incidents as their arrest for drug smuggling and the invasion of their house by the army on manoeuvres. The film is funny, intriguing, and superb entertainment, and is highly recommen­ded by the editor and reviews staff.

Dave Jago

FEUX, September 29, 1980 Page 13

By B.B. Wolffe Hi, I'm B B Wolffe and I'm in charge of exposes, scandals, caustic comments and wry wit. Mr Marshall has allowed me to cast my evil eye over College and the Union and to pick faults. I am very grateful for the opportunity. I must emphasise that Fishy Tales is not a gossip column - I don't like any of this bitchy rubbish about various Union officers shagging in Chem Eng toilets. Fishy Tales is simply a cynic's view of everyday College life. If YOU have any ideas for future articles then by all means write to me - of course, you won't be credited.

IF T H E person next to you in the lecture theatre smells a little bad, it is a good bet that he is a New Linstead resident. Students in this hall are unable to take showers because they have only one temperature setting — extremely hot (although if you wait long enough you may get 'blistering').

As if this wasn't bad enough, there are no shower curtains meaning that your clothes and/or towel on the hook on the back of the door are going to get pretty wet. And, wait for it, the showers have been specifically designed to leak onto the hall carpet!

On my way out I espied a sign on the bathroom requesting that shower attachments be not used in the bath (why not use the shower? Hee! Heel).

Later on, I found out that the bathrooms had not been undersealed and the overflow pipes overflow onto the floor. As I write this very word, I am reliably informed by the person reading over my shoulder that new Linstead has had numerous floods over the summer.

IT SEEMS that Mr Roger Stotesbury (current R C S U Bookshop Rep and last year's ICU Hon Sec) is a marked man in the IC Union Office. Liz Ljndsay expressed her desire "to strangle the wee little bugger" when she discovered that the hall accommodation for the INCOST (5th International Conference for Students Of Technology) had been 'double booked' by Mr Stotesbury. Liz has spent a c o n s i d e r a b l e amount of time attempting to find accommodation for the conference delegates that College were

unable to offer rooms. As it turns out, places had been booked by Mr Stotesbury for two conferences of similar sounding names but which were, in fact, the same conference. Hence Liz wasted a lot of her time as there is plenty of College accommodation for the delegates and College is faced with the problem of filling the rooms now empty.

A further Stotesbury atrocity has come to light! During the occupation of the Senior Dining Room last October a large number of letters (approximately 150) were written by the occupants to their MPs and the press and radio in the hope of publicising the occupation. However, they seemed to have little effect; this is now easily understood as Liz Lindsay found the letters tucked away at the back of the filing cabinet in the Union Office.

Is THIS what U G A s are awarded for?

L A D I E S rugby is not dead . Fol lowing numerous reports in the national press last term, Weekend magazine has just got round to it (3—9 September). Under the title ' S C R U M P T I O U S ' we were treated to a picture of some of the girls 'relaxing with a pint' in the Union Bar and another of Mary Harrington's bum in the scrum.

\liim SAC buudd

T H E S U M M E R Accommodat ion Centre does it again! For the second year running, S A C have not charged a key deposit for Garden Hall keys issued to student cleaners. Last year, a number of keys went missing during the summer (not to mention the Southside, Linstead and Weeks MASTER key which turned up after a little internal bickering when it was discovered an S A C employee had procured it for his/her own use of the Hall launderettes). This year, a similar number have gone missng. Mr Turk (Warden of Garden Hall) is very concerned that most rooms have an average 27 people access and is demanding that a deposit be charged next year.

Veem w tite dwik WE A T FELIX are fed up with pissing on our shoes. The Union bog lights have now been out of action for over a month. Rachel Jane Snee (ICU Deputy President) should pull her finger out pretty soon or that poor old tree in the Quad is going to die of alcoholic poisoning.

tjelfow puke S O M U C H for the new grey carpets ('costing hundreds') in the Maths Building. When will College realise that carpets were not designed for the average IC student?

The toilet in Maths seems to do good trade as the carpet has been almost worn down to the tiles in that area. And how foolish to put the carpet near the coffee machine (have you been able to remove a cup without spilling at least a third of its contents on the floor?).

Best of all was the technicolour yawn deposited not so long ago — the cleaners were talking about that one for weeks.

A trip to the Union Lower Lounge will show what IC students think of carpets. This

carpet was put down only last term and now it is in a disgusting state — I have heard rumours that human excreta has been trodden into it!

Finally, how silly to put carpets on the stairs of Bernard Sunley House; what was wrong with the good old lino that had coped remarkably well when one considers the deviancies peculiar to BSH.

A l l hope is not los t , h o w e v e r ; the chemistry department has recently come up with what they believe is the answer to the students' mistreatment of carpets — they have hung theirs on the wall!

Tke >ici 5eto Ut AUTHORITATIVE sources indicate that the much vaunted cook-freeze system is not working in College as intended. It appears that frozen food from the Sherfield kitchens is being kept in a normal refreigerator in Southside for a number of weeks before being served up in the refectory there. After this period of time it is long thawed out and getting rotten (see 'Mouldy Chickens' story in the last issue).

According to the cook-freeze system, the food should be heated from frozen just before serving. The message is simple — don't eat in Southside unless you don't mind risking food poisoning!

VwhoM S A D NEWS for all Lower Lounge pinball devotees: the pinball machines were removed after one was completely w r e c k e d by person(s) unknown on 23rd August. There has not been a pinball machine in the Lounge since then and it is uncertain whether we are going to see one in the near future (although Rachel Jane promises that new machines will appear by the start of term).

T O D A Y The Oily Dowson Memorial Prize for Misleading Headlines was awarded to Mr S J Marshall. Mr Marshall rose to fame last month with Alf Coleman's Vasectomy.

A N N I E ' S resonant, nay divinely graceful voice has been heard booming out across the Union premises over the tannoy lately requesting that snooker players bring back their balls. Indeed, it is easy to forget time while engrossed in a game, but could it be that people do not return their balls on time because the Union takes their watches as a deposit for them?

L A S T T E R M , some 75 trolleys were returned to Waitrose in Gloucester Road after a visit to IC by the assistant manager.

Recently, a friend of ours, went down to Waitrose to ask if he could borrow a trolley to move his luggage into his new room. The manageress told him that they had only 28 trolleys left and muttered something about all those IC students taking them. Nevertheless, she c o u l d see that our fr iend was a trustworthy sort, and after all, he die! have the decency to ask; so she took him into the back room and gave him a Safeway trolley!

Page 14 FELIX, September 29, 1980

SPORT Fencing

W E L C O M E to Imperial College and all its excellent opportunities.

W e at the I C F C can offer you not only first class coaching at all levels, from Prof A M o l d a v a n y i , but also a full range of equipment in all three weapons. W e have our o w n ' e l e c t r i c b o x ' w h i c h we encourage all interested members to use (know what you mean squire -Ed). O f c o u r s e t h e c h a n g i n g facil it ies i n c l u d e showers, a n d believe us after two hours of hard work you' l l want one! W e meet on Thursdays at 12:30pm in the U n i o n G y m which, incidentally has just had a new floor laid.

T h i s year our main aim will be to i m p r o v e l i n k s w i t h o t h e r L o n d o n c o l l e g e s . E s t a b l i s h i n g l inks w i t h n a t i o n a l univers i t ies will also be investigated.

Fencing is an exacting sport, r e q u i r i n g a great d e a l of self-discipline especially in the early stages of learning, but we hope that in the sociable club atmosphere you will find it an enjoyable and stimulating sport. C o m e and see us at the Freshers' Fair . We ' l l be delighted to see you. If you miss us there, try contacting one of us for more information: Pat Coleman, P h y s i c s P G ( C a p t a i n ) ; D a v e Musker, M a t Sci 2 (Treasurer); or Phi l B ird , Elec E n g 2 (Secretary).

Soccer I F Y O U enjoy running around after a bit of inflated leather then this is the club for you. W e will be h a v i n g t r i a l s o n the f i r s t Wednesday and Saturday afternoon at our sports ground at Hari ington (meet at 12:30 i n the U n i o n Lower Lounge) . Also if you would like to get paid for the privilege of refereeing (and be fully trained to do it) we would like to see you.

If you are interested in helping the club out come to our Freshers' Fair stall to sign on and have a chat with us.

Steve Veats

I C A F C C L U B C A P T A I N

Hockey F O L L O W I N G a highly successful season last year, this session we i n t e n d to i m p r o v e the a l r e a d y h i g h r e p u t a t i o n o f I m p e r i a l College Hockey C l u b . T h e standard of the four teams regularly playing on S a t u r d a y afternoons varies from the 1st X I playing league games twice weekly with training every Tuesday (indeed all C l u b m e m b e r s a r e e n c o u r a g e d to attend these sessions) through to the 4 t h X I w h o s e games are played in a more social atmosphere.

This season for the first time the 2nd X I will be playing in a league and this will increase the opportunity for players to play league hockey.

T h e C l u b has the use of sporting facilities at Hari ington, to which coaches are provided, leaving the U n i o n Archway. These facilities consist of four excellent pitches, good changing facilities and a bar for P O S T - m a t c h refreshment.

T h i s season, n u m e r o u s socia l events have been arranged, such as P i e s & M a s h , D i n n e r , a n d Pizza-Night ; it is hoped that with suitable support these will become regular events.

Anyone interested should come along to our stall at Freshers' F a i r or report with your kit on Wednes­d a y or S a t u r d a y l u n c h t i m e s at 1 : 0 0 p m i n the U n i o n L o w e r Lounge; ask for Pete Hughes.

Mixed Hockey D U R I N G r e c e n t s e a s o n s the M i x e d Hockey side has had few games due to inclement weather and a shortage of lady players. T h i s season however with some fine fixtures arranged we hope to be playing more often.

These matches on Sundays are of a sociable nature against teams such as Guinness (with laid on supplies of stock), Bank of E n g l a n d (without similar free gifts) and it is hoped two tournaments — the Worthing Penguin Weekend and another still being arranged.

It is hoped this year to provide transport to all venues by either car or minibus.

Interested? T h e n contact either Phi l W e b b or Cathy Crossley at Freshers' Fair .

Waterpolo Club piss all over opposition

O N 21st J u n e the I C Water Polo C l u b set off on it's yearly tour of Dorset. It was a cold grey Saturday m o r n i n g as two v a n s a n d one moped headed south-west. After almost half of the journey had been c o m p l e t e d we s t o p p e d at Lymington to play our first match of the t o u r against L y m i n g t o n S w i m m i n g C l u b . T h e match was to take place in an, open air sea-water pool, however the opposition refused to play, because: a) the water was too cold; b) it started raining heavily; and c) there was not e n o u g h water in the p o o l because the p u m p had failed.

Nevertheless the m a t c h took place at N e w M i l t o n S w i m m i n g

. P o o l . P h i l M i l l s a n d B a r r y , s c o r e d t w o g o a l s i n t h e f i r s t quarter and Nick Buckland scored the third goal as his farewell present to the club. However L y m i n g t o n fought back and equalised in the third quarter and at the same time J i m Will iams was the first I C player to be sent off during the tour. Phi l Thwaites scored two more goals in the final quarter, so we won our first match 5-3.

We stayed at the Sandy Holmes C a r a v a n Site outside Weymouth . We played our second match, the most difficult, on Tuesday against Bournemouth City . T h e score at the end of the first quarter was 2-2, Steve T a y l o r and Phil Mi l l s scoring two goals. In the second quarter Cl i f f Spooner scored two goals (one from a penalty). Barry scored another one and our goalie

Dave saved a penalty. Therefore we established a good lead over, o u r o p p o s i t i o n a n d they n e v e r m a n a g e d to c a t c h u p w i t h us. Phil l Mi l l s and Clif f scored two more goals and the final score was 7-5 to us.

T h e third match was held at Bovington A r m y C a m p against the J u n i o r Leaders. T h e i r team was r a t h e r i n e x p e r i e n c e d a n d D i m i t r i , P a t , N i c k L a s t , P h i l S i n c l a i r a n d J o h n H e e f e r s o n s c o r e d f i v e g o a l s i n t h e f i r s t quarter. D u r i n g the rest of the game our scoring slowed down, however J i m Wil l iams scored a goal after putting a great deal of effort. T h e final score was 9-4 to us.

O n Thursday we had our final game against Bridport S C at West B a y . W e p l a y e d i n the r i v e r , which was extremely cold. P h i l Mi l l s and Phi l Thwaites scored a hat-trick each and Barry scored the seventh. F i n a l score 7-2 to I C .

T h e whole tour was a resounding success, both in the pool and out. We kept up the excellent reputation of the C l u b and the college by not losing a match.

T h e team was: J i m Wil l iams, C l i f f S p o o n e r , P h i l M i l l s , N i c k Buckland, Phi l Thwaites, D i m i t r i Papaconstantinou, Dave Roberts, P a t P o r t e r , B a r r y A s w i n . N i c k L a s t , J o h n H e f f e r n o n , S t e v e Tayler , Phi l Sinclair and A m i r A b d u l .

Dimitri

Results Service F E L I X w o u l d dear ly love to prov ide a n efficient results serv ice for its sports m a d readers . T h i s relies o n all c l u b capta ins (or equivalents) br inging in results of S a t u r d a y games by 5 :30pm Monday a n d W e d n e s d a y g a m e s by W e d n e s d a y (yes , the s a m e d a y ! ) . Y o u r c oopera t i on w o u l d be apprec ia ted .

If there is insufficient response we shal l b r a n d y o u all as w a n k e r s a n d d r o p the sports page w h i c h the E d i t o r hates anyway .

• A person emerging backwards on the tip of a polaris missile at Rabion, FRANCE. (Note look of surprise.)

Canoe T H E C L U B is looking forward to another good season. Last year we had river trips to the W y e , U s k Fifey and Dart and four surfing weekends in Cornwal l . T h e summer tour to the French Alps was also successful, although some of our canoes didn't like the rocks.

W e can cater for all abilities, so even if you're a complete novice don't be afraid to come along a n d see us at Freshers' Fair or at the s w i m m i n g p o o l at 6 : 3 0 p m a n y Tuesday.

FEUX, September 29, 1980 Page 15

"Hello, good evening, and "

I suppose I'd better extend a warm welcome to all you freshers or I'll loose my street credibility right from day one. (That was it, incidentally)

You ' r e now reading F E L I X , one of the best student newspapers in the country. I was elected last year, along with L i z , Rae, and J o h n , to edit it for this session. Unl ike some college papers, F E L I X is not constitutionally b o u n d to tow the p a r t y l ine . F E L I X c a n criticize as well as praise Un ion policy. The idea of press freedom is actively encouraged by both the College and the U n i o n , although in individual cases, some people have wished that they c o u l d r e s t r a i n F E L I X to s o m e e x t e n t . T h e F E L I X m o t t o s u m s it a l l up : 'Keep The Cat Free ' .

This year's ICU Handbook I would like to congratulate Dave Crabbe on p r o d u c i n g u n d o u b t e d l y the bes t U n i o n Handbook that I C U has seen. His coverage of c l u b s a n d f r e s h l y w r i t t e n p u b - g u i d e articles, etc, has taken away the usual task of the F E L I X Editor of re-doing them for Freshers ' F E L I X .

M o s t (but not all) of the clubs featured are the ones who couldn't be bothered to submit an article for the Handbook. After spending many, many hours pasting all this up I can only express my admiration for Dave Crabbe for s t i c k i n g to it f or 72 p a g e s a n d m y contempt for these clubs. In retrospect, I should have chucked all of their offerings in the bin. I hope next year's F E L I X Editor will h e e d m y w o r d s a n d b l a c k l i s t c l u b s not bothering to submit to the Handbook .

The Anti-Aparteid Bit It is a pity that Dave should have marred

his Handbook by including the article entitled "The Don't Bank with Barclays bit" on p69. T h i s is n o t h i n g but a n unfa i r a t t a c k o n Barclays Bank. While most people disagree with apartheid, I feel that at a time when b a n k s a r e c o m p e t i n g for c u s t o m e r s by placing advertisements which help, in turn, to fund the production of the Handbook , it is certainly not right to attack one particular bank in such a way.

Barclays has been attacked by extreme f a c t i o n s i n m a n y co l l eges t h r o u g h o u t the country , but it may interest you to know that t h e y s t i l l r e t a i n a h i g h e r p r o p o r t i o n of student accounts than any other bank.

It is illogical to single out Barclays, for

while it is certainly true that they do fund projects in South Afr ica , A L L of the other major banks hold accounts with Barc lays International.

T o end my outburst on this topic, I would like to stab a few IC Anti-apartheid G r o u p freaks in the back: Y o u might be interested to learn that M r Derryck Everett, a former Deputy President, and chief exponent of the 'Let 's stop the Boat Club going to South Afr i ca ' bandwagon does indeed bank with Barclays. When I questioned him about his hypocritical view on life he confessed that he was 'somewhat embarrassed' by it but had formed his strong anti-aparteid views after he had got a bank account. It was too much trouble for him to change now, yet standing up at U G M ' s and slagging off the Boat C lub (very eloquently, I might add) seems little effort.

A n d what about Aftab Gujral? He figures prominently in the Anti -Aparte id G r o u p and banks with Barclays. However , he seems to have his head screwed on the right way as while condemning aparteid, he realises that it doesn't matter which bank you have your account with as they've all got South Afr ican c o n n e c t i o n s . If t h e y c a n ' t e v e n a g r e e a m o n g s t t h e m s e l v e s w h y s h o u l d we be subjected to their ramblings with the possible risk of loosing valuable advertising revenue for U n i o n publications. I will not accept these smear campaigns in F E L I X .

Anti-apartheid G r o u p at IC has done more for the cause of anti-anti-apartheid than its intended aim. A pity.

People who got on my tits this week

Y o u may see a copy of the Liberal C lub newspaper Forward around College today. Its headlines are constructed with letraset s t o l e n f r o m the F E L I X Of f i ce after these Liberal bum-boys were adamantly told that they couldn't use it.

I shall be sending them an extortionate bill for materials and if they don't pay it, I shan't bother too much about including any of their articles in F E L I X .

People to whom I am indebted this week M a n y thanks to Dave Jago, M a r k Smith , Eric J a r v i s , P i n b a l l , S i m o n M i d d e l b o e , S i m o n T u r n e r , D a v e B r i t t o n , C o l i n P a l m e r , T i m Hillyer, M a r k Kuse , Nigel Masters , Barney M c C a b e , B a r r y Aust in , and B . B . , D . G . , Ian and M a z

The Editor

Security overtime ban College security guards and messengers have implemented an overtime ban due to the breakdown in talks with College over revised rates of pay.

O v e r the p a s t m o n t h , the n u m b e r of messengers and security guards have been reduced; the complaint is that College are trying to impose new manning levels on them without settling pay first.

T h e last N U P E U n i o n m e e t i n g was o n Wednesday, 24th A p r i l . This was a result of the m e s s e n g e r s a n d g u a r d s c a l l i n g off a previous overtime ban due to start on 22nd September after College promised further talks.

H o w e v e r , M r D a v i d s o n , the p e r s o n n e l secretary, failed to turn up for this meeting a n d the U n i o n e x e c u t i v e s w e r e m e r e l y presented with a list of manning levels to be worked with the reduced staff. It was then decided to impose the overtime ban.

Confusion was caused in College depart­ments as the N U P E circular read: " A work to rule by all messengers will start at 7am on S a t u r d a y , 2 7 t h S e p t e m b e r , 1980 . U n t i l further notice". In actual fact, a work to rule was voted down in favour of the overtime ban. In the B e i t / U n i o n building this means that there will be no messenger from 7am to 9am, with erratic manning at weekends.

John Retires J o h n M c H a l e , the m u c h l i k e d B e i t H a l l m e s s e n g e r , has r e t i r e d to his g a r d e n in K i l b u r n . J o h n , w h o was at I C for s e v e n years, was made a life member of IC U n i o n and presented with a cheque by the Irish P r e s i d e n t , J o h n P a s s m o r e . F E L I X , w i t h w h i c h J o h n h a s a l w a y s h a d c l o s e t i e s , p r e s e n t e d h i m w i t h a n e n g r a v e d F E L I X plaque.

W e a l l w i s h J o h n a l o n g a n d h a p p y retirement

While you are reading this, another FELIX is being produced.

Why aren't you helping? Contrary to popular belief, F E L I X does not appear by magic. People are needed to work on FELIX. We can offer you: All night orgies (collating) Fun with glue and paper (paste-up) 20 nude persons in your room(photos)

etc

etc

FEUX can be fun!

Design a spacefiller to fill this space

CASH PRIZES!!!!!

FELIX is published by the Editor for and on behalf of the Imperial College Union Publications Board, and is printed by the Union Print Unit, Prince Consort Road, London, SW7 2BB. (589 5111 ext. 1048/int. 2881) Copyright FELIX 1980. Editor: S.J. Marshall, Advertising Manager: M.A. Smith. Registered at the GPO as a newspaper.

FRESHERS' FAIR 1980

Location of Stalls

Afro-Caribbean Anti-Apartheid Art

Badge Badminton Baha'i Balloon Basketball Billiards and Snooker Boat Bridge

Canoe Catholic Caving Chemical Chinese Christian Science Christian Union Chess City and Guilds Union Communist Conservative Cricket Cross-country

Dancing Debating

FELIX Fencing Flesh, Fish and Fowl Folk Football

Gliding Golf Graffitti

Haldane Library Hamsoc Hang Gliding Hockey

ULR ULR SLR

CH SLR CH QL

SLR 3rd QL 3rd

Quad ULR

Quad SLR CH

SLR ULR

3rd LL

ULR ULR SLR SLR

UL UDH

FELIX SCR UDH SLR SLR

QL SLR.

Graffitti Room

AR 3rd QL

SLR

Key 3rd — 3rd floor Union Building (see map) QL — Queens Lawn Quad — Beit Quad LL — Union Lower Lounge UL — Union Upper Lounge AR — Ante-Room (nextto Sherfield Refectory) CH — Concert Hall (2nd floor Union Building) Gym — Union 2nd Floor C B — Crush Bar, Union 2nd floor, central stairs SLR — Sherfield Lower Refectory ULR —Union Lower Refectory UDH — Union Dining Hall SCR — Senior Common Room, first floor, Union FELIX — Second on the right in Union Entrance, Archway

Latin-American Liberal Lon Div Royal Navy Reserve London Student

Methodist Microcomputer Model Aircraft Mountaineering Music

Natural History Nightline

Operatic Orienteering Overseas Students Committee

Pakistan Photographic The Phoenix Pimlico Connection Positive Alternatives to Abortion Rag Railway Real Ale Red Cross CH Rifle Royal College of Science Union Royal School of Mines Union Rugby

Sailing Scout and Guide Socialist Sporting Motorcycle Ski STOIC Surf Swimming and Water Polo Science Fiction

Table Tennis Tennis

SLR ULR SLR

UDH

ULR UDH

Quad UDH ULR

SLR UDH

CH SLR ULR

SLR UDH

FELIX CH CH LL

ULR CB

& QL CH LL LL LL

3rd SLR

IC Community Action Group IC Radio ICWA India Industrial Iranian

CH

Jazz Jewish Judo

SLR LL

ULR SLR CH

Karate Ken Com of Friendship for OS Kung-Fu

Ladies Rugby

ULR Gym

ULR ULR SLR

LL

Underwater University of London Union UL Officer Training Corps UL Air Squadron UN Assoc Youth Council

Vegetarian Volleyball

Wargames Weights Welfare Wine Tasting

Yacht Youth Hostelling Assoc

QL UDH SLR SLR SLR

CH SLR

UDH LL

UDH UDH

SLR SLR

UNION BUILDING AROUND FLOOR

I N D I A MUSIC

METHODIST

C A T H O L K

L I B E R A L

RAILWAY

ANTI-APARTHEID

SOCIALIST

C O N S E R V A T I V E A F R O - C A R R I B E A N

CHRISTIAN UNION

KARATE

I . C . W . . A . RAG

LOWER LOUNGE

C I T Y AND G U I L D S U N I O N

lounge bar

bar

entertain­ments

committee

F I R S T F L O O R

PHOTOSOC - ,

N I G H T L I N E . , f DEBATING

SKI

. WELFARE

MICROCOMPUTER

FLESH, FISH S FOWL

S H E R F I E L D L O W E R R E F E C T O R Y A N D Q U E E N S L A W N

SECOND FLOOR J A Z Z

R E A L A L E V E G E T A R I A N C O M M U N I T Y A C T I O N

R E D C R O S S

Ml concert hall (beit theatre)

P O S I T I V E A L T E R N A T I V E S

T O A B O R T I O N C H I N E S E D R A M A T I C

O P E R A T I C

THIRD FLOOR B R I D G E

C H E S S

I E

W>TST

S T A I R C A S E

L Welfare Icentre

television lounge

C o m p i l e d b y R a e S n e e