final feature story – sophie long
TRANSCRIPT
Kaitlynn kept it a secret her whole childhood. She never told anyone. She
walked the halls of her school, hiding a crucial part of who she was.
“Back in elementary and high school, when people would find out that I was
older than my grade, I would lie. I would tell them that my mom started me in
Kindergarten a year late, instead of the fact that I was held back because school was
a struggle for me.”
Kaitlynn Bianchini, a fourth semester college student, stretches her legs and
gets comfortable on the couch. She wears a pencil skirt with a loose blouse tucked
into it. She sips her water bottle and then straightens her posture, indicating that
she’s ready to begin. Never would it be guessed that her mind is buzzing a million
different directions at once right now. Never would someone suspect her to have
ADHD.
ADHD. Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. Stereotypically, it is thought
of as the solution teachers and parents give to young boys who can’t seem to pay
attention in the classroom. According to the American Psychological Association,
“ADHD is a behavioral condition that makes focusing on everyday requests and
routines challenging. They typically have trouble getting organized, staying focused,
making realistic plans, and thinking before acting.”
Though the terms ADD and ADHD were previously thought to be different
disorders, the official term is now ADHD with the three subtypes: hyperactive,
inattentive, and combined. Because the term ADD was used for so long, some still
refer to the disorder with that instead of ADHD. ADD and ADHD can both be used
interchangeably, as there is now more focus on the subtypes instead.
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According to chadd.org, ADHD is something that 15 million people have in
America. 11% of adults and 5% of children struggle with the disorder. Bianchini is
one of those 15 million and was diagnosed when she was eight years old.
“Because I was struggling in school, my mom looked into it. She took me to
the doctors to see if there was something more that was going on,” Bianchini said.
A study done by the Center for Disease Control and Prevention showed that,
boys are two times more likely to receive an ADHD diagnosis than girls just because
boys are the stereotype. Boys also present more obvious and noticeable symptoms,
where as girls’ symptoms tend to be presented in less obvious ways and are more
“internal.” Healthline.com uses examples of symptoms such as being withdrawn,
intellectual impairment and difficulty with academic achievement, inattentiveness
or a tendency to “daydream”, verbal aggression: teasing, taunting, name calling and
especially low self-esteem (2016).
Many of Bianchini’s self esteem issues stemmed from academic and social
difficulties. She says, “My mom had to meet with the board of directors to see if I
needed to be held back a year in school. They felt that maybe I might do better if I
stayed back a year. Not only did I have ADHD issues, but I was then a year older than
everyone in my grade, so I struggled a lot with confidence.”
Bianchini says, “I didn’t feel smart. After my diagnosis, having to take
medication every day was a constant reminder that I wasn’t normal. As the years
went on, I blamed everything on my diagnosis. If I was bad at something, I said it
was because I was ADD, even if it didn’t correlate to it. It was something to blame
my failures on.”
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ADHD causes a lot of daily struggles in someone’s life. Because of the
imbalance that it creates in the brain, it tends to bring out certain attributes and
characteristics within someone who has the disorder. Some of these obstacles are
major impulsivity, which can negatively affect all aspects of someone’s life. Living a
very sporadic lifestyle can lead to problems such as road rage, difficulty keeping a
job, addictions, relationship issues, etc. A very common struggle that ADHD’ers
experience are learning disabilities. Thomas E. Brown, Ph.D. said, “A person with
ADD is six times more likely to have another psychiatric or learning disorder than
most other people.”
“Something that my classmates never understood was that I was working
harder than everyone else,” Bianchini says. “It may have seemed like I was
disregarding my assignments or not trying, but I was giving it everything I had, and I
still looked like I was failing.”
Because people didn’t understand where Bianchini was coming from, they
tended to be judgmental about her academic skills, which ultimately made school
even harder.
According to the CDC, only one in every three people diagnosed with ADHD
actually seeks treatment for it. Many don’t want to acknowledge their disorder
because they are afraid of being categorized with the negative stereotype that
society believes is ADHD.
Bianchini believes that there are a lot of people with ADHD who just stay
quiet about it. They’re just too embarrassed to come out and get the help, or they
believe they “can do it on their own.”
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Because Kaitlynn has had ADHD for years, she has learned how to address it
and help herself accordingly. However she does recognize that there are different
levels of ADHD and that it affects everyone differently.
She says, “I feel that people with ADHD have higher stress levels because they
are always anxious, restless, or stressed out, and a lot of the time, it’s because of
their own doing with procrastination habits. It’s like a cycle, you’re the one who is
causing it, and the effects are what cause you even more stress.”
These types of traits can make everyday life extremely difficult, even more so
a school environment. This is why many believe in the stereotype of schoolboys
having ADHD, because in children, it’s easiest to diagnose at school. The basic
structure of a typical school day conflicts with the foundational principles of ADHD,
and ultimately causes many “ADHD’ers” to struggle. Because someone with ADHD
encounters hyperactivity, inattentiveness, or a combination of both, having to
quietly sit in a desk all day, listening to the same person teach, and being expected to
ignore all distractions, can lead to an educational disaster.
Something that many don’t realize about those with ADHD, is that most of the
time, they do want to listen. They do want to behave. But their brain makes it really,
really, hard to do so.
Bianchini explains, “When you are in that mode where you can’t focus
anymore, you just give up. There is NOTHING driving you anymore. You have to find
a way to spark your brain to get the chemical going.”
Because not everyone can experience what it’s like to live with ADHD, it can
be hard to understand where someone with the disorder is coming from. This leads
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to judgments placed on those with the disorder, and even uneducated doubts of the
existence of ADHD.
Much of the stigma associated with ADHD comes from the medication aspect.
Because stimulant drugs such as Adderall and Ritalin are so misused in society,
many see an ADHD diagnosis as a cop out to get these drugs that make work “easy.”
Bianchini says, “I wish that people understood the struggle that medication
can present when you’re diagnosed with ADHD. It’s not always easy to find one that
works for you. People don’t understand that it’s not a magic pill. It’s not a cure.
Sometimes the drugs don’t help you all the way. Sometimes you have to come up
with remedies and routines that help you.”
Bianchini uses tactics such as playing with her hair, when she’s feeling jittery
in class. “I find that I focus way better when I’m doing something with my hands. I
can listen, instead of just sitting there with my brain going a thousand directions.”
The government has recognized ADHD in the U.S. and has tried to address
the issue with programs such as the 504 Plan. Because ADHD can present many
struggles for a child while they are in school, this plan was put into play to acquire
the accommodations that those with ADHD need in certain settings. As 5% of adults
have ADHD, certain laws are also helpful, such as The Americans with Disabilities
Act, which makes it illegal for employers to discriminate against employee’s based
on their physical or mental disabilities.
The government isn’t the only one who has been involved in the lives of
those with ADHD. Numerous non-profit organizations have been created with the
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goal of being a resource for those with ADHD. Some have even taken on the platform
of trying to fight the stigma against the disorder.
The Attention Deficit Disorder Association, which caters toward adults with
ADHD, see’s itself as a resource for said adults to “serve, connect, and empower one
another.” One type of mindset that organizations such as ADDA focus on, is viewing
ADHD as a positive attribute.
Bianchini says, “I feel that those with ADHD are really proficient in active
things. We are very adaptable because we thrive off of change. We’re resilient.”
Much of being successful with ADHD is due to someone placing him or
herself in the right environment. Bianchini’s experience of working as a hostess at a
restaurant was benefitted by her ADHD. In a job where a thousand different things
were always happening, she felt that her brain “could keep up and could be
everywhere at once.”
ADHD isn’t a life sentence that means someone can’t accomplish anything.
There are many well-known names in society that openly have ADHD and have been
very successful. According to addadult.com, famous people are diagnosed such as
Adam Levine, Richard Branson, Solange Knowles, Jim Carrey, Michael Phelps,
Wendy Davis, and many, many, more. One trait that all of these people have in
common, is that they chased their passions. A positive attribute of ADHD is that they
can be incredibly determined about something they love. ADHD allows someone to
hyper-focus on a passion, almost obsess on it, until they reach their goal. This is
incredibly helpful for careers such as being a musician, entrepreneur, athlete, etc.
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Though these people have been successful, there is no doubt that they have
faced hardships throughout life due to their ADHD. It’s important to recognize that
these people didn’t let their setbacks keep them from achieving. They addressed
their disorder and lived accordingly.
Bianchini has been able to embrace her ADHD by recognizing the positives
that it has brought to her life. Despite her insecurities, and instead of letting her
struggles make her inferior, she chose to let them empower her. Bianchini knows
she can make her weaknesses into strengths if she’s willing to put in the work.
She said, “ADHD gives me an opportunity to see my self worth. I’d much
rather have this than be really smart, or have a photographic memory, because I’d
miss out on all the lessons that I’ve learned from having the disorder. Because there
is a struggle, we [ADHD’ers] have a reason to look inward, assess ourselves, and see
the value in who we are as just being a person.”
A lot of people think they know what ADHD is: Someone who’s excessively
hyperactive, a child, or incapable of vast achievements. Bianchini describes ADHD
simply. It’s a part of who she is and it’s not going away. She would rather embrace it.
Stigma can truly hurt and affect those who are associated with it. The stigma
on mental health in general, but specifically on ADHD, is very prominent and
commonly inaccurate. Because of Bianchini’s experience, she knows that there
needs to be a change in how others treat those with ADHD regarding the disorder.
ADHD isn’t something to be ashamed of, but rather “something to be celebrated
because of the unique attributes it brings out in someone.”
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Actress, Wendy Davis, who has grown up with the disorder her entire life,
defines it as; “ADHD makes you different, not defective.”
Luckily there are people like Kaitlynn and Wendy who have risen above
others’ negative opinions, and succeeded despite them. Kaitlynn Bianchini is the
prime example that you can have it all if you’re willing to work for it. She is a smart
college student, a confident young woman, and a successful adult who is proud to be
ADHD.
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