A publication of Sheridan House Family Ministries1 7 0 0 S o u t h F l a m i n g o R o a d • D a v i e , F L 3 3 3 2 5 • ( 9 5 4 ) 5 8 3 - 1 5 5 2 • w w w. s h f m . o r g

February 2010

Honoring Christ by serving the needs of children and families

Share The Love

The Great February Valentine Contest!

As I sit to write this column, my heart aches as I continue to read and see the images of the aftermath in Haiti. This small and impoverished country is still struggling to save people trapped in the rubble of buildings. Tragically so many people have lost their lives or a loved one in the catastrophe.

Like me, you’re probably wondering what you can do to help. We received word that there will be hundreds, perhaps thousands of orphaned children as a result of this disaster. Many will be brought to South Florida for temporary placement. Most will arrive with nothing but the clothes on their backs.

Would you join me in helping to collect clothing for these children in need? We will be partnering with 4kids of South Florida to make sure that donations of new or gently worn items are distributed to those orphans as they are placed in temporary housing.

On February 6th, we are holding our second annual Family Values 5K for children & families of South Florida on the Sheridan House campus. Starting that Saturday and through the month of February, we will be collecting clothing for the orphaned children of Haiti.

We would love to have you drop by the day of the race as teams of volunteers will be here to accept your clothing donations. If you would like to sponsor any of our runners/walkers, I’m sure they would appreciate your support and would be happy to bring your clothing donation that morning on your behalf. To see a list of participants to sponsor, please visit our site at www.active.com/donate/familyvalues5k.

Let’s join together so that the world may know of the Love of our Father in Heaven.

Serving Him,

A Note From Bob -

Stepping Out To Help Haiti

Celebrating Restored Lives By: Amy Evans

Mario, Cassie, and Angel all took different paths and made questionable decisions that led them to our residential program. Yet, one thing they have in common is that their lives have been restored; and today, they are celebrating their graduation. These are their stories…

Mario arrived to Sheridan House as a child with a total sense of indifference. He disrespected authority figures and utilized lying and manipulation tactics to get what he wanted. Like many others in the program, Mario was rebellious at first. He didn’t want to embrace the structure of the program or the responsibilities that came with it.

For the first few months, his commitment fluctuated, and in a matter of weeks, he lost all of the points he had earned. Due to his rebellious nature, he had a “Tribunal” meeting which resulted in him being placed on probation. At this point, he realized that everyone was truly there to help him. The combination of his parents’ increased commitment to the program and his personal decision to make wise choices, Mario began to change. He asked Christ to be his Lord and Savior in the summer of ‘09 and became a leader in the house shortly thereafter.

Naturally a socially-wired young man, Mario went from looking out for himself to looking out for others. According to Efrain Figueroa, his behavioral specialist, “Mario is a really good guy with a great heart. As he continues to grow in the Lord and mature as a man, I pray that Mario remembers that he has the power to change his life, and more importantly, that Christ has the power to change his life.”

Although Cassie was a believer when she entered the program, her relationship with Christ wasn’t real to her. She suffered from low self-esteem, was a victim of peer pressure/bullying, sought out negative attention through manipulative behavior and lying, in addition to being extremely defiant. Her peers didn’t want to be around her because she was “fake.” Cassie’s time here was a bit like a rollercoaster ride until she grasped the purpose of the program and developed an understanding of Christ’s deep love for her.

As Cassie began to understand who she was in Christ, her confidence grew dramatically. She not only accepted herself for who she was and for how God has gifted her, but she also began to accept responsibility for her actions. Her family is behind her 100% and they are all communicating well now. “Cassie is now a breath of fresh air,” says Juliana Guevara, her

behavioral specialist. “She has a contagious spirit and servant’s heart. She always wants to volunteer and has been a wonderful example of leadership to the other girls in the house.”

Cassie’s future is bright. She hopes to become a nurse. She is very focused on this goal and has the support of her parents. Juliana’s prayer for Cassie is that she continues to see her beauty and value through God’s eyes; that she continues to focus on the Lord; and that her family continues to use the tools they have been given through the program.

With limited motivation and a GPA near zero, Angel entered Sheridan House. He showed little to no respect for his dad and others in authority; he refused to obey; and academically, he was a D/F student. He just seemed to float through life. Fortunately, Angel seemed to respond positively to our structured routine quickly and his dad was bought in from day one. He accepted Christ within a few months of enrolling into the program and

communicated openly and often about what God was doing in and through his life. Additionally, Angel’s grades improved. He went from a D/F student to an A/B/C student.

Adam Roberts, Angel’s behavioral specialist, states, “He is awesome to be around. He makes everyone laugh. He is always in a positive mood regardless of the circumstances.” Angel really wants to maintain good grades and finish high school. Adam’s prayer for Angel is that he continues to maintain a positive relationship with his dad; that he utilizes the Scripture he has learned and implements it in his life; that he and his dad plug into a local church; and finally, that Angel understands that since he was successful at Sheridan House, he can be successful at anything.

Join us in celebrating these precious, restored lives. Please continue to pray for them as they grow and develop into men and women who seek after Christ and all He has in store for them.

“Being confident of this very thing, He that hath begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ.”

Philippians 1:6

As Cassie began to understand who she was in Christ,

her confidence grew dramatically.

February is love month…whatever that means.

Valentine’s Day is a holiday celebrated worldwide on

February 14th. It wasn’t until recently that I discovered

there are many women who feel pain on Valentine’s

Day. It reminds them that they are alone and makes

them feel unloved.

It’s also a challenge for parents. What does a mom

do about Valentine’s Day? Who does your first grader

give a Valentine’s card to - just the kids they like or

everyone? What if they don’t get Valentine’s cards from

other children? How does a parent deal this whole

event in a way that helps the child learn something?

What if Valentine’s Day was utilized to talk about doing

love acts rather than getting love tokens? One of

the biggest challenges parents face today is to train

children to be self-sacrificing rather than self-centered.

One parent said it well, “My twelve-year-olds favorite

thought is ‘Me! Me! Me!’”

February offers parents a great training tool to teach

what love really means to their children. Rather than

commercializing it and making it about how many cupid

and heart cards a child collects, use it as a teaching

opportunity of one of life’s greatest lessons - showing

acts of love. Imagine how much fun your family would

have by using February or “Valentine’s month” to focus

on how each family member could demonstrate love to

others the best way possible?

Valentine’s Day Offers A Great Parent Training Opportunity. If You’re A Parent, Don’t Miss It!

by Dr. Bob Barnes

Let’s begin with the rational for this effort in training

about what love is by learning what it isn’t. Love

is not selfish. From a developmental point of view:

Self-centered people are never happy. They are never

able to indulge themselves enough. Families filled

with self-centered children are not fun to be around.

Everyone is out for themselves. Each sibling competes

to see who can get the most attention. Self-centered

people grow up to be users: people who use those

around them to find happiness.

Families that don’t attempt to train their children about

what it means to love other people end up raising

adults who function with adolescent mindsets. When

a person’s constant thought is me, he or she is very

unmarriageable. Part of training a child into adulthood

is to teach a child to think of others rather than be

obsessed with self.

1 Corinthians 13:4-8a states, “Love is patient, love is

kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not

proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not

easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love

does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.

It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always

perseveres. Love never fails.”

Christ was asked what the most important thing is for

each of us to do. He responded by saying first and

foremost is to love God. Then He said second was to

express that love for God by loving the people around us

(by loving our neighbor) (Matthew 22:39). Why teach

our children to learn how to express love to the people

around them? It is a command from God himself.

Another reason this must be taught, is because children

today need to learn to separate the action of loving

another person from the act of sex. Sex and love

are not synonymous. In fact, they are quite often in

conflict. Sex can easily be something a person takes

rather than gives.

As we face February and love month, our children are

going to see a lot of diamonds being marketed on

television. They could be left with the opinion that

love is something expressed with money – first, with

the purchase of a card - years later, with the purchase

of a gem. Love is so much more than that; and it has

to be taught.

Love is something that a person does to serve the needs

of another person. Children need to see their parents

love each other by serving each other as part of the

training process.

It just might be that Valentine’s Day presents one of

the year’s great parent training opportunities - a time

to teach our children that love is something you do...

not something you feel. If we don’t, who will? If we

neglect to teach this life lesson, we will actually hamper

the potential for our children’s future happiness. They

could spend a lifetime waiting to be loved and miss the

fact that it is actually their responsibility and privilege

to love - starting with the people around them…their

neighbors.

Children love point boards and fun contests- especially contests where other people have to go to a centrally located poster board or clipboard and check a document when someone else has done something. So, here’s a Valentine training idea.

As a family, declare February to be Valentine’s Month and decide to teach what it means to express love by serving each other. Every time a child helps fold the laundry without being asked or helps unload the dish washer without being asked, etc. they receive a point on the board. If they actually show enough initiative that they go ahead and do someone else’s task without being asked, they get two points. However, the key of this exercise is that the other person has to record the act of service. No one can give themselves credit for showing love.

The Great February Valentine Contest!

Make up your own list and encourage the kids to become creative. Have a brainstorming session while eating popcorn. Make it fun to talk about expressing love. The purpose is to focus on teaching kids

and reminding adults to express random acts of love. Love is something you do...not something you feel!

Help out with a household responsibility – i.e. washing dishes, making beds, taking out the trash, etc.

Encourage each other with a kind word or personalized prayer

Volunteer to give up a privilege to benefit someone else – i.e. turn to sit in the front seat, pick out a family movie, etc.

Offer to make a meal for the whole family

Allow a family member to use/borrow/have something that you love so much – i.e. some of your clothes, favorite game, car privileges, etc.

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Jonny D. Madison B.Lenny G. Hailey H.Tatiana P.Alexis O. Chris L.

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Josh J. Devin R.Marcus W. Angel M.Amanda R.John V. Wesley N.

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Savanna S. Ferdinand P.Heaven W. Dayton E.Devin B.Alicia J.

Your contributions are tax-deductible to the full extent of the law. A copy of the official registration and financial information may be obtained from the Division of Consumer Services by calling toll-free (1-800-435-7352) within the state. Registration does not

imply endorsement, approval, or recommendation by the state. Sheridan House Family Ministries registration number is CH24786.

Celebrating 40 Years of M

inistr

y

Sheridan House Family Ministries1700 S. Flamingo Road, Davie, FL 33325(954) 583-1552 • shfm.org

Friday, April 23, 2010Global Event Center @ First Baptist Church of Fort Lauderdale

Exciting Live Auction, Plus Silent Auction

To register, visit www.shfm.org/auction$15.00 per person

For more information or to donate items, please contact Amy Evans at aevans@sheridanhouse.org or at 954-414-3386.

*All proceeds will benefit Sheridan House Family Ministries.

SAVE THE DATE!

2.6.10Family Values

5K Run/Walk

Stepping Out For Children & Families

Saturday, February 6th, 2010

Sponsor a runner @ www.shfm.org/5K