false ids for seniors
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7/28/2019 False IDs for Seniors
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4 Thursday, May 30, 2013 Springboro Sun
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Letters to the
Editor Policy
A guy the other day told me it was tough being 54 and seven
months. He said, Merge, its like being five months away from
getting your drivers license or turning 21.
He was right. He was stuck in no mans land. Too old to hang
out with the 30-something crowd, to old to cruise with the 40-
something Porsche guys, but
too young to take advantage of
the wonderful opportunities
afforded seniors 55 and over.
By the way, who started this
senior at 55 thing anyway? It
used to be 65 and you had to
show three pieces of ID and
have pictures of grandkids and
great-grandkids with ya, andnot on a smart phone. Today,
they card anyone that looks
younger t han 75. A re there
underworld types that fabricate
false IDs for seniors that arent
seniors so theycan get a 10 per-
cent discount at Wendys and Arbys? What would happen if you
had a false senior ID and got caught buying a senior meal after
being stealthily observed by the secret senior detective bureau of
your local police department?Theyrun a make on you, find out
your 53 and you just got a $1.20 discount on a business meal at
Wendys. Special geriatric jails wouldbe setup fortime outplus
the judge in the morning, court costs and a menial fine of prob-
ably $125 and a slap on the wrist to not do it again. My advice
is hang in there, your day will come. Patience is a virtue. And
you dont need to pay for the new high tech low profile police
cars theyre all wanting. Here are three of my favorite celebrity
sayings: When you go into court, youre putting your fate into
the hands of 12 people who werent smart enough to get out of
jury duty. Norm Crosby If it were not for Thomas Edison,
we wouldbe watching television in thedark. Michael Landon
And my favorite ladies and gentlemen: The reason there are
two senators for each state is so that one can be the designated
driver. Jay Leno On the planet earth each time you have a
birthday 9 million others are having a birthday on the same day.
Maybe we could start something cool with the other 8,999,999.
Lets think about that for a while. If theyd all just send me a $1,
Id be happy. If the population of China walked past your house
in a single file, the line would never end because of the rate of
reproduction. Thats a nightmare. By the way dont buy Lipton
green tea its maid in China and contains lead. I quit drinking it
about a year ago when I found out. I ts in the news again One
more crazy item: The words RACECAR AND KAYAK are the
same spelled forwards and backwards. They call em palin-
dromes. Are you a palindrome. Nan, Bob, how many can you
come up with? Come join me for entertainment and lots of fun
on Wednesday night at Heatherwoode. Ill have 53,000 songscovering BillboardsTop200 going back to 1950 plus a whole lot
more and live enterta inment with Genesis singing some of
todays great music and oldies. It all starts at 6:30 PM on the
deck and goes to 9:30 PM. You can order the greatest burgers
cooked on the outdoor grill. I had one and it was awesome its
ground round beef and outstanding. Lots of other goodies, soft
drinks, beer, wine, cocktailsits pure crazy fun. Rain or shine
weget the partyon, well cover you inside if it pours.This event
started last week and runs through the middle of August. Dont
miss i t. Great fun for all . I ts gonna be HUGE! Remember,
Wednesdays at Heatherwoode from 6:3-9:30 p.m. C U There.
Bring all your friends or have them meet you there. Next weeks
theme is Caribbean get your Jimmy Buffet on and come on
down.
False IDs
for seniors
MERGE WRIGHT
B
y Don Wright
Times
Columnist
Chloe Kirby, Kim Kirby, Shelley Walker and Sydney Walker at Springboros Regional basketball game against
Walnut Hills in March.
I have one emotion above all else.
Theres pride and appreciation, of
course. Theres enjoyment and satisf ac-
tion. But as my daughter Chloe will be
among the 375 students who graduate
from Springboro H.S. Saturday
evening, I have one emotion above
everything else.
Im so happy for her.
Im so happy she had a wonderful
experience in her 13 years as a Panther.
Im so happy shell forever look
back on her school days with a fond-
ness and a smile.There are so many reasons for that
posit ive experience.
First and foremost, I credit her
teachers and principals, who were on
the front lines each morning between
the good days and the bad, and between
the subject matters that came easily for
her and those that didnt.
Chloe was blessed to be led by the
best, from Ann Sundst rom in her days
at Jonathan Wright to Sandy Wray at
Clearcreek Elementary (a Springboro
icon), to Bruce Lewis at Springboro
Intermediate, and to Andrea Cook at
the junior high school. Last, and cer-
tainly not least, she benefited from Dr.
Ron Malone for four years at the high
school.Good principals set the overall tone
and tenor of the people who work
inside their buildings. When properly
set, teachers thrive. And when teachers
work in a good environment, the stu-
dents are the ultimate beneficiaries.
On behalf of my daughter, I say
thanks.
Chloe was also taught by the best.
While rocket science isnt a subject
in kindergarten and first grade, some-
thing far more important is. Chloe
learned basic principles that are impor-
tant not just in school, but also in life.
Stephanie Roeder and Nicole
Ockerman taught her the value of
structure and timeliness, and more
importantly that a respectful reassur-
ance was way more motivating than a
demeaning putdown any day.
Thanks.
In fourth and fifth grades, Chloe
won the educational lottery by having
Judy Metzger as a teacher both years.
When someone writes a new textbook
on what elementary school teachers
should be like, an entire chapter should
be devoted to Mrs. Metzge r. She was
s m a r t
and funny, firm but fair, and everything
in between.
Think about it. Mrs. Metzger had a
direct influence every school day when
Chloe was an emotional, growing ado-lescent. Do I think thats played a role
in Chloe being the beautiful person she
is t oday? You bet.
In junior high and high school,
Chloe had so many good teachers, too
many to name here. All of them played
a significant role in her education and
development, even if they taught sub-
jects or used methods that di dnt exac t-
ly jive with Chloes personal wants.
She benefited from all of it.
Stephanie Jordan, you sparked a pas-
sion in Chloe for English and grammar
that continues to this day. Shari
Malone, you inspired her to read more.
Joyce Cook and Art Burton, you
showed her that math means more than
just 33% off what Chloe wants to buy.
Jenny Cooper and Lindsay Sav, you
showed Chloe what it means to be a
smart, confident, successful young
woman.
There were many, many more. To all
of you, thanks.
Chloe has also prospered because of
some excellent friends. Yeah, sure,
theyve all been stinkers to one another
a time or two, but theyre all good kids.
When I hear old cronies complain that
todays kids lack proper manners and
discipline, I quickly disagree.
Chloes been surrounded by students
who are smart, talented and responsi-
ble.
Delaney Ikirt has always called my
wife Mrs. Chloes Mom. Sydney
Walker and Cassidy Holtrey have beenthe voice of reason whenever Chloe has
wanted her own way. Chloe, listen to
your mother. Conrad Lamb, Chloes
boyfriend, has always been her best
friend.
Though I am clearly bi ased, I believe
this Class of 2013 is one of the finest
the school has ever had. It has succeed-
ed in so many areas, namely academics
and athletics. The leaders of tomorrow
were raised here.
Jake Johnson has given this class the
motto it should remember for all time
(and should be shouted at graduation):
II believeI believe thatI
believe that we.I believe that we wil l
win. And then they should all jump up
and down like they did before every
football and basketball game.
To all of Chloes friends, and you
know who you are, thanks.
But Im also happy for Chloe
because shes made so many correct
decisions to become such a hard-work-ing and likeable young woman.
Like her mother, shell make her way
in this life because shes not afraid to
work. And like her mother, she likes to
be involved. She knows what she likes
and isnt afraid to go after it.
Its been so nice to hear from so
many parents and her teachers: We
just love Ch loe.
Shes been active with the yearbook,
the student council, and as an aid for
Dave Stuckey, a teacher she had as a
freshman. Shes also held a few part-
time jobs at The K, at my law office
the last two summers, and now as an
assistant shooting weddings with local
legend, Max Surikov.
She stays busy.Shes also been a cheerleader since
the third grade. For her, the role gave
her a chance to feel involved with the
football and basketball teams. For me,
it gave me a reason to go to all the
games and resurrect briefly the sports-
writing career I stepped away from 25
years ago when I became a lawyer. Its
been fun.
Ive always accentuated what it
means to have The Heart of the
Panthers. And now Chloe has lived to
embody it.
Though shes ready for the next
chapter in life, which means college in
the fall, she leaves Springboro with the
feeling that it was all good.
As her father, thats all I couldve
ever asked for.
So, during this graduation weekend,
theres pride and appreciation and the
satisfaction of a job well done. But, for
me, theres one other more important
emotion.
Good for you, Chloe. Good for you.
Jeff Kirby is an attorney and writer
who lives in Springboro. He can be
reached at [email protected].
Good for you, ChloeBy Jeff
Kirby
SpecialWriter
Im concerned that from the
time Im writing this column until
publication, just a couple of days,
the subject of the article will likely
change many times. Suffice it to
say that from the first admission
just over a week ago that the IRS
selectively went after conservative
groups as harassment, the potential danger, harm and fear has
reached new levels.
Ive talked many times over the years about the absolute power the
IRS seems to have over Americans. The realization that the power is
utilized in a hurtful, vengeful and political manner has shown clearly;
and I take no great relief in knowing ground zero is an hour away
from here and the same area where our taxes are processed.
Now having said that I will say I have nothing to hide. We donttake a pennys worth of deductions unless we have it coming. Seeing
what that strong-arm agency has done to the businesses of a number
of HONEST good friends over the years and some individuals as
well, I plan to keep my distance from any auditors. And I always
have. The consequences are just not worth any money wed hold
onto.
But if you detect a bit of apprehension in my words, you bet its
there. Have you ever had a police car approach from behind lights
flashing and siren howling? You know you did nothing wrong, but
youre palms still begin to sweat. The cruiser passes you by. Its much
the same with the IRS. You know youve done nothing wrong. But
you also know they have their own enforcers, their own laws, their
own courts and if they get you in their crosshairs youd better look
out.
Have you noticed in recent years the suggestion of an overhaul of
the IRS, the adoption of a flat tax or the Fair Tax, which would essen-
tially neuter the agency? As quickly as the new plans are unveiled,
lawmakers suggest theres no way to change the Internal Revenue
Service that much. So the plans fade away.
I find it very hard to believe that this Democrat Administration, at
the highest levels, knew nothing about this illegal pressure, heard
nothing about it or did nothing about it. Its tough to believe some
local IRS manager, on their own, decided to put the squeeze on con-
servatives. Perhaps my view is a bit skewed having cut my journalis-
tic teeth during Watergate. Hopefully it will all come out in the wash
and those guilty will be bunking with Bubba and his friends at the
federal penitentiary.
Only time will tell.
What scares me more, and should scare you too, is that this is the
same agency that will be enforcing the Affordable Health Care
fines unless we can derail Obamacare. I have to wrap up now. I
want to make sure all my boxes of financial paperwork are ready to
go when this edition hits the streets.
I really dont look good in stripes!
Friend Mike at www.facebook.com/mikescintoshow or visit
mikescintocolumns.blogspot.com
Beware the IRSMike
Scinto
Suncolumnist