fall 2015 defense of learning
TRANSCRIPT
Defense of Learning
Lumi Chan - English Resident UTR English Cohort 7
Fort Hamilton High School
2015-2016
Defense
of
Learning
Focus Class: 9th Grade Literacy (Double Period)
∗ 33 on Roster, 8 focus students.
Dakire:
∗ 8th Grade ELA Exam: 1.86
∗ 8th Grade Math Exam: 1.96
Samantha:
∗ 8th Grade ELA Exam: 1.98
∗ 8th Grade Math Exam: 2.26
∗ IEP: Team Teaching ∗ Classification:
Background Information
Dakire
∗ Student is of the lower-level
students; serves as lower level
in focus group
Samantha
∗ Student belongs in average-on-
level group; serves as highest
level in focus group
Initial Strategy: Quick Outline Focus Skill: Constructing a well written paragraph. Rationale: Based on the baseline assessment, students lack organization in their essay writing.
Subskills: 1. Forming a Topic Sentence
2. Forming a Concluding Sentence
3. Writing in complete sentences
4. Using Sentence Transitions
5. Explanation of Evidence (Analysis of Quotation)
Smart goal: Students will be able to write a well written paragraph with a topic sentence, conclusion sentence, quote, and explanation by December 23, 2015.
CCSS.ELA-LITERACY.WHST.9-10.4 Produce clear and coherent writing in which the development, organization, and style are appropriate to task, purpose, and audience.
Defense of Learning
In the first weeks of class, students were given an opportunity to
write an essay about Steve Job’s Commencement Speech.
Baseline Assessment: Steve Jobs
Date: 9/21/15
Period Names
Skill 1:
Constructing a
well written
paragraph
Writing in
complete
sentences
Forming a Topic
Sentence
Forming a
Conclusion
Sentence
6,7 Abakar, Dakire 50.00 0.65 0.00 0.00
6,7 Brito, Anthony 60.00 0.00 0.00 0.00
6,7 Chen, Lin 65.00 0.65 0.65 0.00
6,7 Comisi, Jason 55.00 0.55 0.00 0.00
6,7 Dalton, Samantha 65.00 0.65 0.55 0.00
6,7 De Los Santos, Maria 60.00 0.65 0.55 0.00
6,7 Garcia Galeano, Denzel 0.00 0.00 0.00 0.00
6,7 Hernandez, Angel 0.00 0.00 0.00 0.00
44.38 0.39 0.21 0.00
Students were
absent for
assessment
Students did
not provide
conclusions in
their writings.
9/21/2015
Context: Steve Job’s
Commencement Speech
2005
Task: Write a well written
paragraph about the two
strongest lessons in the
speech.
Student struggles with
forming a Topic Sentence,
using appropriate
quotations and Conclusion
Sentence
Dakire: Student Sample
Spelling
mistakes
Floating
quotes
Weak Topic
Sentence
No conclusion
9/21/2015
Context: Steve Job’s
Commencement Speech 2005
Task: Write a well written
paragraph about the two
strongest lessons in the
speech.
∗Student struggles with
choosing appropriate
quotations, analysis and
explanation of evidence.
Samantha: Student Sample
No Conclusion
Weak
explanation
Introduction
of quote
Weak
Topic
Sentence
1.Lack the ability to synthesize material from text
2.Weak at creating an argument/claim
3.Inability to use evidence from the text and give proper citation
4.Missing Topic Sentence & Conclusion sentences
5.Often write in fragments and incomplete sentences
6.Improper use of capitalization and punctuation
7.Awkward transition between sentences
What I noticed...
Cycle #1: Introduction of Quick Outline
Cycle #2: Quick Outline + Sentence Transition
Cycle #3: Quick Outline + Sentence Transition +
Extended Explanations
Cycles
1.Introduced the Quick Outline P.I.E P.I.E P.I.E a. Students need to have a structure for their writing
b.Students need to create claims for their paragraphs
c. Students need to use sufficient quotes and explanation
Cycle 1: Introduction to Quick
Outline
∗ Students are to create a claim on whether or not the protagonist, Claudette has/has not become civilized through St. Lucy’s.
∗ Students are to follow the outline and create a short hand of notes regarding the Point, Important Quote, and Explanation they will use in their paragraphs
Introduction to Quick Outline
Before allowing students to individually write their paragraphs, we
practiced together.
1.Finding Evidence in the text
2.Ranking the Evidence and Explanation of ranking (Post-its
Activity)
3.Practice of Quick Outlining
Process
Post-its Claim Activity
Students are broken into
pairs.
1. Individually they first
find 3 claims they support
the most and write it
down on the post-its.
2. Together, students then
choose 3 out of the 6
combined pieces of
evidence to put into the
chart.
3. After all 3 evidence is
placed into the chart,
students are to write a
sentence to support their
reasoning.
All Together, we
showed how to
fill in the quick
outline.
Introduction of Quick Outline
Everything is written in
shorthand
Using only IMPORTANT words
Students had the option to
choose their own claim
Dakire: 1st Quick Outline
Following directions of shorthand
For the first outline, the
Topic Sentence and
Conclusion sentence
was provided for
students.
Paragraph
Did not use the required
conjunctions in her writing.
Did not follow the quick
outline format. Instead, first
sentence is used to
introduce evidence.
Included 2nd point and quote
Included conclusion sentence from the outline.
Samantha: 1st Quick Outline
Does not use shorthand
For the first outline, the
Topic Sentence and
Conclusion sentence
was provided for
students.
Paragraph
Topic Sentence
First Point, Quote
and Explanation
Second Point, Quote
and Explanation
Third Point, Quote
and Explanation
Conclusion Sentence
Statistical Changes
Students did not write conclusions
Steve Jobs Baseline Assessment St. Lucy’s Quick Outline: 1st implementation
Maximum value of 1 = fully grasp the concept
First Quick Outline Assessment
Date: 10/21/15
Period Names
Skill 1:
Constructing a well
written paragraph
Writing in
complete
sentences
Forming a
Topic Sentence
Forming a
Conclusion
Sentence
6,7 Abakar, Dakire 50.00 0.65 0.65 0.65
6,7 Brito, Anthony 60.00 0.65 0.65 0.65
6,7 Chen, Lin 65.00 0.65 0.65 0.65
6,7 Comisi, Jason 55.00 0.65 0.65 0.65
6,7 Dalton, Samantha 65.00 0.65 0.65 0.65
6,7 De Los Santos, Maria 60.00 0.65 0.65 0.65
6,7 Garcia Galeano, Denzel 50.00 0.65 0.65 0.65
6,7 Hernandez, Angel 0.00 0.00 0.00 0.00
50.63 0.57 0.57 0.57
Reflection: Students that are following the quick outline are able to produce a coherent paragraph yet,
students need support in organization and flow of essay.
Students continue to practice using the quick outline with an extension
of using Sentence Transitions
Cycle 2: Quick Outline + Sentence
Transitions
Dakire: Characteristic Paragraph
Dakire was required to create her own quick
outline and paragraph based on the
characteristics provided on either Annie or
Helen.
Student struggles continuously
with proper capitalization and
spelling but shows
improvement in her writing and
organization of paragraph.
Samantha: Characteristic Paragraph
Paragraph Quick Outline
Samantha continues to
struggle with her
explanations but shows
significant improvement.
Statistical Changes in Cycle 2
St. Lucy’s Quick Outline: 1st implementation The Miracle Worker: 2nd (extension)
New component added:
Sentence Transitions Many students who didn’t do well previously improved in
terms of writing in complete sentences, forming a topic
sentence, and forming a conclusion sentence.
Second Quick Outline Assessment
Date: 11/19/2015
Period Names
Skill 1:
Constructing a
well written
paragraph
Writing in
complete
sentences
Forming a
Topic
Sentence
Forming a
Conclusion
Sentence
Sentence
Transitions
6,7 Abakar, Dakire 70.00 1.00 1.00 1.00 1.00
6,7 Brito, Anthony 40.00 1.00 1.00 0.65 1.00
6,7 Chen, Lin 75.00 1.00 1.00 1.00 1.00
6,7 Comisi, Jason 55.00 0.75 0.75 0.00 0.55
6,7 Dalton, Samantha 80.00 1.00 1.00 1.00 1.00
6,7 De Los Santos, Maria 75.00 1.00 1.00 1.00 1.00
6,7 Garcia Galeano, Denzel 65.00 0.70 1.00 1.00 0.55
6,7 Hernandez, Angel 55.00 0.60 0.55 0.55 0.00
65.71 0.92 0.96 0.81 0.87
Reflection: Students are now all producing a proper quick outline, but still struggle in following the outline
and producing each part of the outline in their writing.
Students still lack the usage of sentence transition and
proper use of the quick outline.
Breaking away from the text a little, students will use a
related article to produce a quick outline.
What we did next...
Dakire: Practice Outline
Introduction to Topic Sentence
Introduction to Conclusion Sentence
Introduction of Quote
Explanation of quote
Third Introduction of Quote
Explanation of Third Quote
Second Introduction of Quote
Second Introduction to Quote
Samantha: Practice Outline
Introduction to Topic Sentence
Introduction to Conclusion Sentence
Sequence TIME and SEQUENCE
Explanation of a Quote
Sequence TIME and SEQUENCE
Explanation of Third Quote
Sequence TIME and SEQUENCE
Second Introduction to Quote
Both students are able to use the outline and
sentence transitions properly, but they lack
the ability to provide fluid explanations on
the quotes they provided.
Reflection: Students need more scaffolding and
practice in writing good explanation sentences.
Multiple Paragraph Outline
This is an extension of the
Quick Outline: Each
paragraphs are modified for
only ONE point. Students will
still need a Topic Sentence,
Conclusion Sentence, Point,
Quote (2) and Explanation (2).
Dakire: The Miracle Worker Final
Clear Topic Sentence
Use of Evidence #1
Explanation of #1
Conclusion Sentence
Use of Evidence #2
Explanation of #2
Samantha: The Miracle Worker Final
Clear Topic Sentence
Use of Evidence #1
Explanation of #1
Explanation of #2
Use of Evidence #2
Conclusion Sentence
Statistical Changes in Cycle 3
The Miracle Worker: 2nd (extension)
The Miracle Worker: 3rd (extension)
New Component: Explanation
Third Quick Outline Assessment
Date: 12/14/2015
Period Names
Skill 1:
Constructing a
well written
paragraph
Writing in
complete
sentences
Forming a
Topic
Sentence
Forming a
Conclusion
Sentence
Sentence
Transitions Explanations
6,7 Abakar, Dakire 70.00 1.00 1.00 1.00 1.00 0.70
6,7 Brito, Anthony n/a n/a n/a n/a n/a n/a
6,7 Chen, Lin 70.00 1.00 1.00 1.00 1.00 0.65
6,7 Comisi, Jason 65.00 1.00 1.00 1.00 1.00 0.65
6,7 Dalton, Samantha 75.00 1.00 1.00 1.00 1.00 0.70
6,7 De Los Santos, Maria 65.00 1.00 1.00 1.00 0.75 0.65
6,7 Garcia Galeano, Denzel 65.00 1.00 1.00 1.00 1.00 0.65
6,7 Hernandez, Angel n/a n/a n/a n/a n/a n/a
68.33 1.00 1.00 1.00 0.96 0.67
Reflection: Students are all producing proper quick outlines, students are able to write in proper sentences
and almost all components of the quick outline is reflected in their writing.
∗ Classroom management: Non-stop side conversations
Next Steps…
∗ Scaffold students how to write an introductory paragraph
(give them the sentence starters and slowly take it away)
∗ Scaffold students how to write a conclusion paragraph
∗ Writing a full 5 paragraph textual based response essay
Challenges and Instructional Next
Steps
∗ Attending Professional Development
(Hunter College & FHHS)
∗ Continuous conferences and lesson plan
meetings with mentor
∗ Hunter Courses/Professors
∗ Consulting with fellow residents and
ELA Cohort members
Professional Next Steps
∗ Mentor, Fellow Teachers at FHHS, Fellow Residents at FHHS, Site Coach,
Fellow English Cohort members
∗ Hunter Classes:
English Methods SEDC 721 - Teach like a champion 2.0
English Methods SEDC 714 - Professor Jessica Livingston
∗ Professional Development
∗ Books: - Teaching with a Vision
- Formative Assessment
Overall Reflection:
From the beginning of the year, September, until now, January, almost all students
have improved drastically on their writing and are able to produce a quick outline
to help structure their writing.
Resources & Overall Reflection