every night i remember i have another fear
TRANSCRIPT
Every Night I Remember I Have Another FearAuthor(s): Chris PetrakosSource: The Iowa Review, Vol. 5, No. 4 (Fall, 1974), p. 25Published by: University of IowaStable URL: http://www.jstor.org/stable/20158295 .
Accessed: 15/06/2014 10:13
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EVERY NIGHT I REMEMBER I HAVE ANOTHER FEAR
Every night the night enters me, the night
irrigates my body, twists my veins until they're black, paints my blood black, wraps my marrow
with black gauze, stamps me black, dissects me
with black instruments under a ceiling that's
lost all its stars. Every night this happens.
Every night I remember something that has happened at night, I remember my brother and his old love
weeping in the dark over past-perfect sadnesses, I
remember wanting the walls of my room to be black, I remember missing my father for hours at night in bad weather, I remember the broken bottles
of night that shine like fear, and I remember I
have another fear too.
Every night I wake up afraid I'm going to stay here forever, I'm afraid of what'll
come out of the rnouseholes around the blanket
and around my body, I'm afraid of the black teeth
in the letters of my name, I'm afraid I'm a nail
being driven into the dark, I'm afraid of dying in the dark, I'm afraid I'll live a long time, live a long time by slowly dying.
25 Chris Petrakos
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