Purdue University Cooperative Extension Service is an equal access/equal opportunity institution.

ENGAGING CRUCIAL CONVERSATION SKILLS IN CONFLICT SITUATION

George Okantey, MPA, CPLP

Community & Talent Development

Purdue Extension-Marion County

2/16/2016

Objectives:• What are crucial moments?

• What are vital behaviors?

• Styles under stress in conflict situations

• How to build a culture that embraces conscious dialogue for better results

• Q/A

Purdue University Cooperative Extension Service is an equal access/equal opportunity institution.

Definitions

Crucial moment: The point in time when the right behavior, if enacted, has an enormous effect on every result you care about?

Vital behavior: A high leverage action that, if routinely enacted, will lead to the results you want.

Purdue University Cooperative Extension Service is an equal access/equal opportunity institution.

My conflict situation

Recall a conflict situation at work, home or in your community. With your partner, explain the crucial moment when the conversation became contentious. What behaviors did you do and what was your conflict partner’s response? How was the issue resolved?

What’s wrong here?

Where are you stuck?

Look at areas in your life where you may be

experiencing poor results or strained relationship

• Identify areas where you are not getting the results

that you want

• Come up with three examples

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Will the real problem please step forward?

Your boss has grown accustomed to asking you to produce complex reports for her. She’s not asking you because it’s part of your job, but rather because you have some background in databases and know how to work with your system. To make matters worse, it’s often a last-minute request that takes you away from other priorities. She’s just asked for a “special” last-minute report that is very time consuming to produce. Not only is it tough for you to produce, she’s requiring it by 3:00 p.m. today (way too condensed a time frame). To top it all off, you don’t believe it will provide her with information she really needs. But she’s your boss, and if she wants it, she should get it—right?

Purdue University Cooperative Extension Service is an equal access/equal opportunity institution.

Problems with the case we have just reviewed

Content

The report is useless

It is really not your job to do these things

Pattern

It is always a last minute request

Your manager consistently demands unrealistic time frames

Relationship

It does not seem that your manager values your other work

You do not feel comfortable speaking up to the manager

Which problem will you deal with and why?

Purdue University Cooperative Extension Service is an equal access/equal opportunity institution.

Purdue University Cooperative Extension Service is an equal access/equal opportunity institution.

Purdue University Cooperative Extension Service is an equal access/equal opportunity institution.

Purdue University Cooperative Extension Service is an equal access/equal opportunity institution.

Purdue University Cooperative Extension Service is an equal access/equal opportunity institution.

Purdue University Cooperative Extension Service is an equal access/equal opportunity institution.

Purdue University Cooperative Extension Service is an equal access/equal opportunity institution.

Purdue University Cooperative Extension Service is an equal access/equal opportunity institution.

MY STYLE UNDER STRESS

Purdue University Cooperative Extension Service is an equal access/equal opportunity institution.

Purdue University Cooperative Extension Service is an equal access/equal opportunity institution.

Purdue University Cooperative Extension Service is an equal access/equal opportunity institution.

Purdue University Cooperative Extension Service is an equal access/equal opportunity institution.

Hostile Leader

Purdue University Cooperative Extension Service is an equal access/equal opportunity institution.

Purdue University Cooperative Extension Service is an equal access/equal opportunity institution.

Instructional Design

• Sixteen hours of classroom time—two consecutive days or spaced–learning format

• Original video clips of “before” and “after” situations

• Extensive in-class practice and group participation to help build skills

• Application to real individual, team, and organizational issues

• Video-based instruction from the New York Times bestselling authors of Crucial Conversations: Tools for Talking when Stakes are High

• Post-training tools to help continue and progress learning

Crucial Conversations: Tools for talking when stakes are high

Purdue University Cooperative Extension Service is an equal access/equal opportunity institution.

Participant Materials

• Participant Toolkit

• Copy of Crucial Conversations:

Tools for Talking when Stakes are

High

• Audio Companion

• Model Cards

• Post-training online learning tools

Purdue University Cooperative Extension Service is an equal access/equal opportunity institution.

Crucial ConversationsInstructor Class

May 12-13, 2016Indianapolis, IN

George M. Okantey, MPA, CPLP®

Community and Talent Development Educator

Purdue University Cooperative Extension Service

Purdue University is an equal access/opportunity institution

Okantey@purdue.edu

@okantey