eft for pregnancy and birthing - wordpress.com · • relieve stress and promote general relaxation...

EFT for Pregnancy and Birthing www.FertilityPregnancyBirth.com

EFT for Pregnancy

and BirthingAn introduction to using Emotional Freedom

Techniques for a healthy pregnancy and calm,

comfortable birthing

by Monika Benoit


The information in this manual is not meant to diagnose or treat any individual disease, and

cannot be used in place of medical or psychological care.

Disclaimer

While EFT has produced remarkable results, it must be still considered an experimental

method. By using the methods describe in this manual, you agree to take complete

responsibility for your use of EFT and for your emotional and physical well-being. Monika

Benoit, CT Wellness Connection LLC, and “Holistic Solutions for Women” cannot be held liable

for how you choose to use these methods. If you feel in any way reluctant to use these

methods for yourself or others, please do not. Instead, consult a qualified professional.

This EFT Manual would not be possible without the developer of EFT, Gary Craig, who has

creatively and generously taught the healing art of EFT to hundreds of thousands of people.

The manual is inspired by Gary Craig's ideas and key concepts, and is also based on the

examples and teachings of countless skilled EFT practitioners who have helped shape the

practice of EFT over time. EFT was released into the public domain in December of 2009.

Sharing This EFT Manual

There are many ways you can share this EFT Manual. To request permission to copy and

officially distribute any part of this manual, please visit www.FertilityPregnancyBirth.com.

Images by Manoj Vishyan (http://www.inkbugdesign.com)


Table of Contents

INTRODUCTION 1

WHAT IS EFT? 2

EFT BASICS 3

HOW TO DO EFT 5

GETTING REALLY SPECIFIC 9

SAMPLE SESSION: APPLYING EFT TO A FEAR OF GIVING BIRTH 11

ORIGINAL EFT 13

THE SETUP PHRASE 14

FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS 15

ADVANCED APPLICATION OF EFT 19

IF EFT DOESN'T SEEM TO BE WORKING 25


Introduction

This guide will show you how to apply EFT effectively. EFT can help you value, explore, and

transform your emotional reality – the thoughts, beliefs, and emotions you carry with you.

This, in turn, can assist you during every stage of your parenting journey: getting pregnant,

enjoying a healthy pregnancy, giving birth comfortably and taking in the wonders of

parenthood while staying calm, clear-thinking and relaxed. You can apply EFT to yourself as

soon as you finish the reading this guide. As a self-help method, EFT can help you:

• Get pregnant naturally

• If currently undergoing IVF treatments - stay optimistic, calm and stress-free

• Feel comfortable and safe during your pregnancy

• Diminish cravings for unhealthy food and addictive substances that may pose a risk to

your developing baby if consumed during pregnancy

• Improve and alleviate physical discomfort or pain related to pregnancy symptoms,

including morning sickness, fatigue, headaches, hypertension and swelling

• Relieve stress and promote general relaxation during your pregnancy and birth

• Increase your energy levels prenatally and during labor

• Increase your chances of having a normal delivery

• Ease, or alleviate, anxiety about giving birth to your child

• Avoid a medically unnecessary c-section

• Reduce, and even eliminate, the pain of labor while having an un-medicated birth

• Release and transform painful, uncomfortable or “bad” emotions like anxiety, sadness,

anger, guilt, frustration, etc.

• Increase self-esteem, clear-thinking, positive feelings and a sense of greater peace

• Heal the effects of emotional and physical trauma of any kind

• Maximize the success of self-help methods like visualization and self-hypnosis to use

during birthing to shorten labor time and alleviate pain

• Enjoy healthy sleep habits during pregnancy and encourage your newborn baby to

sleep better

• Resolve financial blocks and help us change your financial behavior to help prepare for

the arrival of a new baby

• Address relationship problems that may stand in the way of a healthy family interaction

• Empower children, parents and families

• Benefit the lives of your pets, who are often times directly affected by the addition of a

new baby to the family

• Resolve emotional eating and weight issues once your baby is born

• Promote spiritual growth, self-empowerment and confidence in yourself & your children

….and so much more....


What Is EFT?

EFT stands for Emotional Freedom Techniques and it is a self-help method that combines

gentle touch with mindful attention to thoughts and feelings. EFT involves tapping with our

fingertips on acupuncture/acupressure points on the face, hands and body while focusing on a

problem or issue we wish to resolve. EFT allows us to release and transform the way feelings

like guilt, fear, or anger may be affecting our bodies and our health. EFT can also be used to

help transform the thoughts and beliefs behind our emotional experiences.

Our emotions contribute to infertility, pregnancy discomforts, birthing pains and

complications, difficulty nursing, and problems with postpartum healing. EFT gives us a way to

change the manner in which our emotions affect us; this allows us to enjoy our body's natural

state of well-being. Although scientific research is still deciphering the exact mechanics of

how EFT works, what is astonishing is that it works so often and so thoroughly. The vast

majority of people who try EFT often report feeling calmer, more balanced and able to breathe

more easily - after just a few rounds of tapping. With the help of EFT it is possible notice,

acknowledge, and transform how we feel & express our emotions.

EFT was developed by engineer Gary Craig and based on the work of Roger Callahan. EFT is

easy to learn and incredibly flexible. With EFT we can start to respond to our own emotional

states and help ourselves feel better more quickly. Our thoughts, beliefs, and emotions affect

our bodies and the way we live our lives. EFT is a tool that can we use to consciously make

the changes we desire.

Emotions, Energy, and the Brain

Emotions have an energy to them and when we release uncomfortable emotions - our energy

changes. EFT works with the body’s subtle energy system – a complex system of energy

pathways, called meridians in traditional Chinese medicine. These pathways, or channels, can

be accessed when specific locations on the body are stimulated. These points are often

referred to as acupoints. Acupuncture stimulates acupoints by using needles to release stuck,

stagnant energy and to re-balance the system; acupressure uses finger pressure. EFT can be

thought of as “emotional acupuncture” or “mindful acupressure.” During the EFT process, the

act of tapping directs kinetic energy through blocked energy channels (meridians), clearing

them while simultaneously removing certain negative emotions.

How EFT Works


It is no secret that our body, mind, and emotions are intimately connected. When we apply

EFT to something that is wrong with us – our thoughts, our feelings, and our bodily responses

seem to shift. Interestingly, EFT also has an effect on the brain. Brain scans, including MRIs,

have shown that stimulation of acupoints (as is done with EFT tapping) sends signals directly

into the "survival" parts of the brain. This is the part of the brain where the fight-or-flight part

reflex come from. Rational language centers do not communicate with this area of the brain

and so words alone cannot activate this brain center. Some experts suggest that the EFT

process reaches the survival-instinct mechanism of the brain and helps to reprogram our

reactions at that fundamental level.

EFT Basics

Important note: A shortened version of EFT, that is currently favored worldwide by most EFT

practitioners, will be taught first. The complete original EFT “Basic Recipe” is taught later on in

the guide. For better results, make it a point to learn both.

1. Focus on a Specific Problem

Think about a negative emotion or uncomfortable physical sensation and assess how intensely

you feel the sensation. On a scale of 0-10, how intense is this feeling? (This just gives you a

point of reference, but feel free to scale your intensity in a way you feel comfortable with).

2. Do the EFT Set-Up

To perform the Set-Up, tap on the Karate Chop point (outside edge of hand, see image below)


3. Tap through the EFT Sequence:

Tap through the Sequence (beginning with the Top of the Head) while repeating a Reminder

4. Reassess Your Intensity. Has your number changed? What number would you give the

intensity now? If you can’t think of number, just make your best guess.

5. Refocus on the Issue and Repeat. Do the tapping process again.

For your subsequent rounds of tapping, be sure to adjust your wording:

Adjusted EFT Setup Phrase (to say as you do the EFT Set-Up):

“Even though I still have some of this remaining (insert your problem), I deeply and

completely love and accept myself anyway.

Adjusted Reminder Phrase (to say as you tap through the EFT Sequence):

“This remaining (insert your problem).”

For the EFT Setup, gently rubbing the Sore Spot is an alternative to tapping the Karate Chop

point. This will be explained in the next section.


For Example:

Practitioner: What would you like to work on? How intense is it on a scale of 0-10?

Client: “I am anticipating going into labor and I feel nervous, my heart is pounding, and I think

the intensity is maybe at a 7.”

The Process: Tapping the Karate Chop, say the Setup Phrase three times:

“Even though I’m nervous about going into labor and my heart is pounding, I deeply love and

accept myself anyway.”

Tap through the Sequence (start with the Top of the Head) & repeat the Reminder Phrase:

“This nervous heart pounding...”or “This heart-pounding, going into labor nervousness...”

Asses How You Feel: After one round of tapping all the points, how badly is your heart

pounding now - on a scale of one to ten?

Repeat the Process: Begin with Set-Up, using the adjusted Set-Up Phrase, and then proceed

to tap through the Sequence again, repeating the adjusted Reminder Phrase as you tap:

Adjusted Set-Up Phrase (to say while doing the Setup):

“Even though I still have some of this nervous heart pounding...”

Adjusted Reminder Phrase ( to say while tapping through the Sequence):

“This remaining nervous heart pounding...”

How to Do EFT

1. Focus on the Problem and Measure the Intensity:

Before beginning to tap, take some time to become very aware of what you would like to work

on. You can focus on an emotion, a body sensation, or a more complex problem – whatever is

bothering you. Just take a deep breath and sit with your issue for a a moment. What are you

feeling? The more specific and detailed you can be, the better. Think about what part of the

problem makes you feel most intense. Notice how you experience the emotion in your body -

like tightness in the chest or a knot in the stomach, for example. In other words, how do you

know you are feeling what you are feeling? Give your problem a specific label. For example:

• “This anger at myself for not being able to conceive”

• “This fear of that childbirth will be painful that gives me sweaty palms”

• “This nausea that makes me feel like I will vomit”

Sometimes you might feel afraid, worried, hopeless, or have some other strong feeling about

starting this process - it is important that you tap for these feelings before moving forward with

anything else. As you think about doing this process, you might feel that your issues are too

complex or scary to approach by yourself - consider consulting an experienced practitioner.


2. Create Your Setup Phrase and Perform the Setup

A typical Setup Phrase uses the following format:

“Even though I have (this problem, uncomfortable emotion or physical sensation), I deeply

and completely love and accept myself.”

Examples of Setup Phrases:

• “ Even though I'm very angry at myself for not being able to conceive, I deeply and

completely love and accept myself.”

• “Even though I am afraid that childbirth will be painful and that gives me sweaty palms,

I deeply and completely love and accept myself anyway.”

• “Even though I feel nauseous and all I want to do is vomit, I deeply and completely

accept myself anyway.”

Physical Problems – What to Say For Your Set-Up Phrase:

If you are working with a physical discomfort ask yourself a few questions and use the answers

in your Set-Up phrase.

• What does it feel like to have this problem?

• If my physical pain had a color, what would it be?

• If there were an emotional contributor to this issue, what might it be?

• What was going on in my life emotionally when this physical problem started


Performing The Set-Up:

Why We Perform the Set-Up

The Set-Up prepares our system for change and softens any internal resistance we may have.

We acknowledge the problem at hand while creating an atmosphere of positivity, self-

acceptance and compassion. The Set-Up is a safe way to acknowledge and express the

uncomfortable feelings we are experiencing; it allows us to acknowledge our emotions and

symptoms. Doing the Set-Up is way to give yourself permission to release your discomfort.

3. Tap through the Sequence using the Reminder Phrase

After you have done the Setup, tap through the Sequence of points, repeating a Reminder

Phrase at each point. The Reminder Phrase simply states the uncomfortable feeling. It is a way

to hold the problem in focus while tapping and transforming your energy.

Example Reminder Phrases:

• “This anger – I can't conceive”

• “This sweaty palm fear - childbirth will be painful”

• “This nausea - I feel like vomiting”


Performing the Sequence:

After you finish tapping, relax and take a deep breath. When you have done the Setup and the

Sequence, you have completed one round of EFT.

4. Evaluate the Results

After a round of tapping taking plenty of time to notice any results from the tapping process.

How does your body feel? Is there any change in the emotional intensity you were feeling?

Has your intensity gone down? Rate your intensity again. Let’s say you started with

“nervousness” at a “7.” You may still feel nervous but the tapping took the edge off of it, and

you would now rate it a “5.”

5. Refocus on the Issue and Repeat the Tapping Process

For subsequent rounds of tapping, we often change the words slightly. Perform the Setup

three times, beginning with the Karate Chop point (or Sore Spot):

Adjusted Set-Up Phrase:

“Even though I still have some of this fear, I deeply and completely accept myself.”

Tap through the Sequence again with the adjusted Reminder Phrase, using the word

“remaining” where appropriate:

“This remaining fear...”, “This remaining anger...”


Getting Really Specific

Typically, EFT works best when we can be as specific as possible, whenever possible. To

increase our chances of getting great results with EFT, it is important that we keep re-focusing

our thoughts during the process.

When we are working with a large or global issue, like “fear of going into labor” for example,

we may be trying to focus on too many feelings at once and EFT may not have any noticeable

effect. To tackle such a global issue it is very important to zero-in on specific parts of the issue.

Three good ways to zero-in are to: break the issue down into specific past events; to work with

the emotion as it is held in the body; and to work with our own imagery. It is usually very

useful to use all three of these ways of zeroing-in as you work through any complicated issue.

1. Specific Events

Break your issue down by focusing in on specific events in your life that made you feel this way

before, either recently or in your childhood. For instance:

• “Even though my mother told me that giving birth to me was the most terrible thing

she ever endured...”

• “Even though the woman in labor on the TV show died while giving birth...”

• “Even though my doctor told me giving birth naturally would be impossible…”

As you deal with specific events, you will probably start to feel the emotions of those

times. By thoroughly tapping for all the details of the memories that feel upsetting, you will

effectively erase the discomfort that comes with the larger issue you initially chose to work

on. Working with specific events is highly recommended and often gets the most noticeable

results. Address each detail of your specific memory with as many rounds of tapping as

needed - until your emotional intensity is a 1 or 0. Address each of your feelings, and each of

the limiting beliefs you took on, with its very own series of tapping rounds.

2. Becoming Aware of Your Body

Where do you feel the feeling in your body. What is it like physically? How do you experience

this emotion in your body? For instance:

• “Even though I feel the fear like a void in my chest…”

• “Even though my throat feels constricted because everyone is always criticizing me...”

• “Even though I feel this awful nervousness in the pit of my stomach...”

Many times, after tapping you will feel changes in the way the body is holding the emotion.

The sensations may decrease, change in quality, or even move to a different place in or on

your body. When emotional energy moves around the body, this is known as “chasing the

pain,” and this is a sign that you are on the right track.


3. Inner Imagery

Use an image to give your feeling more detail. If you are good at visualizing, imagine what the

energy of the fear looks like, or feels like for you, and tap on the details of that image.

Imagery is another way to listen to our feelings. As we tap, images often begin to change as

our energy shifts. After tapping, ask yourself has the image changed in any way? How does it

feel now? For example:

• “Even though this anger is like a big, red ball in the pit of my stomach...”

• “Even though this fear is choking me like a snake wrapped around me tightly…

• “Even though I feel the sadness like a wave drowning me...”

4. Addressing Specific “Aspects”

Every issue we work on has many parts, many details,

and many possible triggers for the uncomfortable

emotion that we are feeling. Recognizing aspects

and tapping very specifically for different aspects

is another skill required for effective EFT. For instance,

if you are afraid of going into labor, you may have

many aspects of that issue to tap on:

• Anticipating the pain of your contractions

• Panicking at the thought of your baby “getting stuck”

• The fear that something unexpected may happen to you

or your baby during the birth

You can continue to uncover aspects with the question, “What bothers me the

most about going into labor when I think about now?” Eventually, there will not be much that

bothers you and the fear will be gone, unless there are core issues around which “fear of going

into labor” might just be the tip of the iceberg. Many issues carry a complicated mix of

emotions. Let’s say you have tapped for your hurt in a certain situation. The hurt has subsided,

but now you feel angry. As hidden layers of emotion emerge, these are more aspects of the

issue and must be handled separately. Looking for different aspects and then specifically

targeting these aspects with tapping will go a long way towards achieving lasting results.

5. Finding Core Issues

Releasing a core issue can release the energy of an entire problem. Calling a problem a core

issue is just another way to describe the underlying the issue at hand. Discovering a possible

core issue often takes time as well as detective work. If you have tapped for a current issue

and still feel that something is not shifting or resolving, it is time to look deeper. One of the

best EFT questions to ask is: “What does this remind me of?”

Tap on whatever comes into your mind even if it doesn’t seem relevant. Most intense issues

have deeper roots. Often times, specific events from childhood need to be addressed with


numerous rounds of tapping. What we believe about ourselves is based on specific old

events, and this can form the basis of a core issue. As we use EFT to address these specific

events as they rise up, our beliefs about ourselves begin to shift and we can naturally allows

ourselves to change and grow. Clues about core issues or events can come up spontaneously

as you work on an issue. Just follow your feelings. Sit for a moment after a round of tapping

and see what comes to mind.

Going With the Flow

As you tap, things usually begin to change.

You might begin to notice that certain details of the

problem don't bother you as much anymore, or

you might feel differently about the situation.

For instance, your nervousness may subside to a 3,

but now embarrassment is coming up at a 10.

This is a different aspect of the issue.

As you move through different aspects, you will be addressing the complexity of the issue. Be

sure and refer to your original intensity assessment and be sure to notice what has changed

from that starting point. A thorough process may take you through many aspects, including

changes in the way the emotion is showing up in your body, etc...

Continue rating the intensity and tapping as you address each part that arises. Stay focused

on, or refocus your attention on, what is most intense, or most important, for you in this

moment. Paying attention to aspects and targeting each aspect with the tapping is one of

the best ways to address the many parts of the problem at hand. Being specific gets the best

results.

Sample Session: Applying EFT to a Fear of Giving Birth

This example demonstrates being specific, zeroing-in, tapping for aspects, and finding a core

issue. Let’s say that Jane is pregnant for the second time and she is terrified of going into

labor. She wants to use EFT to get over her fear. She is doing the tapping on her own. First,

she rates her fear at a 10. If she thinks about giving birth her heart beats fast, her palms sweat

and her stomach cramps up. She does one round of tapping:

The Set-Up Phrase (she says this as she taps on the Karate Chop Point):

“Even though I have this terrible fear of giving birth, I deeply accept myself”

The Reminder Phrase (she says this as she tap through the Sequence):

“This terrible fear of birthing”

Now she takes a moment to notice that her palms are not longer sweating, her heart is

beating a bit more slowly and she feels a little calmer. She closes her eyes and begins to really

focus on the idea of going to labor. As she does this she begins to feel really uncomfortable,

but she realizes that she is no longer at a 10. Jane's 10 intensity has fallen to about an 8.


Jane decides to get specific, zero-in and tap for some of the details of going into labor that

bother her the most:

• “Even though I am really afraid of how painful the contractions will be…”

• “Even though I'm afraid that their will be some complication...”

• “Even though I hate being hooked up to an IV...”

After several rounds of tapping, Jane can really start to visualize going into labor and feel

much calmer. She decides to test her results and watches a clip of a woman having a natural

water-birth video on-line. Watching the video still makes her fearful. What is it about that

video that bothers her? She realizes she is most bothered by the fact that complications from

giving birth could possibly kill her or harm the baby. She adjusts her Set-Up Phrase and does

another few rounds of tapping:

• “Even though I am afraid of of dying during labor...”

• “Even though I am afraid the baby could get hurt during labor...”

• “Even though I am afraid of what could happen if I have complications ...”

Soon, Jane can look at the birthing video quite calmly. Her fear is not gone but it is down to a

4. She decides to zero-in on some specific events. What has happened in her life to give her

these fearful feelings? Jane knows immediately it is because she had a terrible experience

giving birth to her first daughter. Thinking about her first child's birth feels intense – around a

6 or so. Jane adjusts her Set-Up Phrase:

“Even though giving birth to my daughter was terrible experience...”

Suddenly the details of this memory pop into Jane's mind. Jane remembers being frightened

beyond belief. This memory has a lot of emotional charge and brings her back up to an 8. Jane

adjusts her Set-Up Phrase again:

“Even though the contractions were horrific and they baby seemed stuck and the whole thing

was terrible, I deeply accept myself...”

She taps for a number of aspects of that now-vivid memory:

• “Even though I screamed…”

• “Even though a whole crew of nurses came running and everybody was yelling…”

• “Even though the doctor grabbed my baby grabbed up with a look of horror...”

• “Even though the whole thing was awful…”

Finally the memory seems neutral. She can think of the entire event without feeling any

emotion. She returns to the birthing video and feels completely neutral while watching it.

Maybe the traumatic memory of her first child's birth was a core issue, and tapping for that

core issue has shifted her whole response to giving birth. Emotionally, everything seems to be

at or near 0 intensity. Jane feels like she will be okay when she goes into labor. She knows

that if she feels fear or anxiety, she can just tap. She is now looking forward to enjoying a calm

and comfortable birthing experience.


Original EFT

The original version of EFT as taught by EFT developer Gary Craig included two

parts that are not always used in the more common shorter versions.

The Complete Original Basic Recipe Includes the Set-Up, the Sequence, and:

1. Tapping on Finger Points

2. Adding the 9 Gamut Procedure

3. Repeating the Sequence After the 9 Gamut

All of these variations are important to know. If you are not making any progress using just

doing rounds with the Set-Up and the Sequence, try the complete Basic Recipe for

an issue and see how it feels. You can start with the shorter version and always add the finger

points or the 9-gamut in your tapping whenever you wish. These procedures often add extra

power to the process. They can be used flexibly; for instance, some people routinely include

the finger points but skip doing the 9-Gamut. The Complete EFT Basic Recipe, as originally

developed by Gary Craig, is as follows:

How to the Original EFT Basic Recipe: The Details

1. Focus: Pick a very specific negative emotion or physical symptom and assess its

intensity on a scale of 0-10.

2.

2. Perform the Setup: While tapping on the Karate Chop point or rubbing the

Sore Spot, repeat the following three times:

“Even though I have this (uncomfortable emotion), I deeply and completely accept myself.”

3. Tap through the Sequence: All the while keep stating the Reminder Phrase with each point,

beginning with the top of the head eyebrow, side of eye, under eye, under nose, chin,


6. Perform the Sequence: Now tap through all the points of the Sequence again, stating the

Reminder Phrase at each point. You've just completed the original EFT Basic Recipe!

About the 9 Gamut Procedure

The 9 Gamut has been called the “Brain Balancer”. The eye movements, humming (right brain)

and counting (left brain) help to engage the right and left sides of the brain. It was a part of

the original EFT Basic Recipe, but Gary Craig stopped using it routinely around 1998 when he

realized that he usually got excellent results without it. However, many practitioners find it to

be a useful tool. The 9 Gamut generally creates a pleasant feeling and it can help keep things

moving along, especially when using EFT on a persistent problem.

The Set-Up Phrase

The classic EFT Setup phrase involves:

1. Acknowledging the problem (“Even though I have this___”)

2. While at the same time affirming self-acceptance (“I deeply and completely love and

accept myself”).

The Set-Up can effectively get rid of internal resistance to change (originally called

Psychological Reversal). This has the effect of opening your energy system to healing and

positive change. The standard wording may or may not fit for everyone, and when it does not

feel right, there are many variations that work equally as well, or better:

• “Even though ______, I’m okay anyway.”

• “Even though ______, I want to accept myself.”

• “Even though ______, I can choose to forgive myself.”

“Even though ______, I love and accept my young self.”

• “Even though ______, I choose to accept myself with compassion.”

• “Even though ______, I can choose to be a little kinder to myself.”

• “Even though ______, I accept all my feelings without judgment.”


It is important to allow the healing process to unfold at whatever pace you are most

comfortable with. You might not feel like accepting yourself right away and so the standard

phrase Set-Up may feel like it doesn't fit. Use a Set-Up Phrase that feels respectful of your true

feelings. All of the following expressions will create an openness in your system which allows

EFT to transform the energy of your emotions:

• “Even though ______, I acknowledge my feelings.”

• “Even though ______, that’s just how I feel right now.”

• “Even though ______, I choose to allow this to change.”

• “Even though ______, I can let these feelings go if I want to.”

• “Even though ______, I’m open to the possibility of healing and change.”

• “Even though ______, I'm willing to heal this as much as possible.”

• “Even though ______, I honor myself for how hard it has been for me.”

Frequently Asked Questions

What do the different tapping points mean?

The original points in the EFT tapping Sequence are all endpoints of meridians (energy

channels). An additional point, that was not included in the original EFT Sequence, is the Top

of Head (TOH), which has been used widely as EFT developed. The Top of Head is called the

“Hundred Meeting Point” in acupuncture, and tapping there feels very balancing and effective

for many people. Some like to add a point about two inches under the nipple, called the Liver

Point, while doing the Sequence. The Liver Point is also a meridian end-point and was only

included in the original Sequence for a very short while just as EFT was first developing, but it

quickly lost favor because of it proved to be an awkward position for women (directly under

the breast). Another point that accesses several meridian lines is the inside of the wrist.

How hard do you tap, how many times, and what side of the body should you tap on?

It is good rule of thumb to tap with your fingertips about of 7-10 times on each point, but you

don't have to count. If it feels good to stay on any one point, it is fine to keep tapping. A

gentle tapping is all that is needed. When there are points on both sides of your body, it

works to tap on just the right or just the left or even switch sides during the Sequence. Or you

can try using both hands to tap both sides at the same time. Try different ways, see what feels

best to you.

How do I know what to say when I’m tapping?

Most importantly, there are no magical right words and you can’t do it wrong. The words you

use just help you tune in to your issue as specifically as possible. You can simply plug your

problem into the standard Set-Up and Reminder Phrase formats and usually get results. You

can usually be as free flowing with your Set-Up and Reminder Phrase as you like as long as you

stay focus on one specific issue at at time.


energy, and usually they respond well to this kind of attention.

How do I tap with children?

Make it fun! Have a sense of humor and be playful. Get down to eye level with the child and

let them lead the discussion. Remember that they articulate things differently than adults do.

Help them describe their problem as specifically as possible by involving colors, sparkles, and

shapes. Use a teddy bear or any stuffed animal or doll to show them where to tap. Let the

child tap on the stuffed animal as he or she talks about what is going on, and shift from time

to time over to having the child tap on herself. You can hold a stuffed animal yourself and tap

along, guiding the child through the issue.

Does EFT always work instantly?

Although there are times when profound shifts and positive changes occur immediately, at

other times, the process requires many sessions (either with yourself doing the tapping or

with a professional practitioner). Often there are a variety of aspects that have contributed to

the concern, and it can take many rounds or sessions to resolve a complex issue.

Can EFT cure serious problems medical problems like Premature Ovarian Failure?

The body, mind, and emotions are closely connected and because EFT addresses the whole

person, healing results can be astonishing but it is important to remember that EFT cannot be

labeled as a “cure” for any serious condition. EFT can be thought of as an integral part of a

healing strategy. Serious conditions are quite emotionally complex, and EFT can support

healing in many ways. If you are willing to explore possible emotional contributors to your

condition (on-going stress, childhood trauma, unresolved grief and loss, identity issues) EFT

sessions over time can, in most cases, provide great relief (i.e. healthy pregnancy, etc...) EFT

can also help with symptom relief and can help alleviate the side effects of conventional

treatments (like IVF), medications and procedures (surgeries or c-sections, for example).


I cannot tap with my fingertips, is there an alternative?

You can try simply imagining the tapping. As you go through the EFT process and visualize

tapping each point, certain neural pathways are activated within the brain. Imagining the

tapping requires a particular kind of concentration, but many people feel that imagining the

tapping gives the same profound results as regular, physical tapping.

Can I use EFT with other methods/techniques?

Yes, there are many other healing techniques out there that can be combined with EFT in

beneficial ways. Hypnotherapy, Reiki, Psychotherapy, reflexology, traditional counseling, and

countless other therapies can be easily blended with the EFT process. Many traditional

therapists are amazed at how quickly and effectively EFT works and a surprising number of

them are now using EFT within their regular practices.

Isn't it bad to keep stating the negative, shouldn't I try to stay positive?

Remember that the Reminder Phrase (repeated as you tap through the Sequence) is a short

form of the longer Set-Up phrase, which is actually a positive statement. For example, the Set-

Up phrase might be: “Even though I am experiencing this fear and sadness from when my first

pregnancy miscarried, and I can feel it as a constriction in my throat, I love and accept myself.”

The Reminder Phrase might be variations on “this miscarriage fear” “this sadness in my

throat,” “this miscarriage throat constriction,” etc. A good rule of thumb is to use any words

that will keep you focused on the energy of the problem, which can feel uncomfortable. By

allowing yourself to focus on the negative while doing the Reminder Phrase, you give

uncomfortable feelings the opportunity be safely expressed and transformed by your tapping.

When should I see a practitioner?

Working with a practitioner can provide you emotional support, guidance, a different

perspective, and usually – better results. The subtle nuances of EFT, often called “the Art of


Delivery,” are not something you can learn within days or weeks from a book or a DVD alone.

If you have a complex issue (like childhood abuse or low self-esteem) and get stuck tapping on

your own, it is a good idea to contact a practitioner.

Is there a way to use positive affirmations with EFT?

Yes, but first address the negative feelings and emotions.

Allow this to be a gradual process. Once your feelings

are no longer very intense (at an intensity of 0, 1 or 2)

it may be a good time to adjust your Set-Up and

Reminder Phrases to reflect emotions and states of

mind that you would like to feel. If you are ready to

feel calm, peaceful, or at ease, then there are many

ways to be creative as you tap: “Even though I’ve had

this (name problem), it is releasing now, and I give

myself permission to feel (content, peaceful, happy, etc)

instead.” Another way to tap in positive affirmations

is simply to tap in lists of things you are thankful for, whatever you find beautiful or

meaningful, or things you would like to feel about yourself or your life. You can tap on the

points while saying affirmations about today being a good day, consciously bringing positive

energy into your day.

Is there a way to assess progress without using the scale of 0-10?

Yes. Consider all of the different aspects of the situation or trauma that you are working on. As

you complete rounds of your tapping sequence, allow yourself to take a moment to sense

what is going in within you:

• What about where it was located in your body? For example, if your fear was

expressing itself as a tightness in your stomach, is that tightness still there?

◦ Has the physical sensation lessened, moved, or changed?

• Is there a visual picture that has formed?

◦ If so, how bright is the picture? Can you see colors?

◦ How clear are the people and objects in the picture? Does the picture look lighter?

◦ Is the picture beginning to look more faded?

◦ Is the picture fuzzy or dispersing, turning black-and-white or sepia?

• Are your other senses engaged (auditory, kinesthetic)?

Does EFT done over the phone work as well as EFT done in person?

Yes, most EFT professionals conduct a large part of their practices over the phone and this isn't

simply for sake of convenience. A phone session can provide you with more privacy and visual

distractions are completely eliminated. Tapping sequences can easily be guided on the phone.


Advanced Application of EFT

The real skill in applying EFT involves an understanding of the “Art of Delivery.” This guide will

introduce you to to some of the most important concepts, hints and tips have proven to be

highly effective. These guidelines can really help you get results but there is no substitute for

practice, experience, and in-depth training. The basics below will get you started with some

essential skills.

1. Breaking Issues Down To Specific Events

The biggest mistake beginners make with EFT is to tap on too broad of an issue. Take time to

determine, very specifically, what you are targeting with your tapping. This is perhaps the

most important Art of Delivery skill of all. A global problem may be something like “self-

esteem.” But this an issue that is actually made up of many things: fears and beliefs picked up

through movies and television shows, traumatic life events, self-blame, etc.... Tapping for the

global problem may not give you the results you want; however, breaking it down into specific

events usually works even better. Try to notice when specific events come to mind during the

tapping process. You can also ask questions in order to bring specific events to your attention.

2. Be a Detective

Asking good questions can help you get specific details about the problem that will help you

focus in on the most relevant aspect of the problem to tap on.

• What specifically bothers you about this?

• Exactly what does this feel like to you?

• Describe what you are feeling in your body.

• What is an example of this problem in action?

For example:

Q: “So, you’re mad at your husband? What exactly bothers you about him?”

A: “He’s a jerk.”

Q: “What is an example of a time when he was really a jerk?”

A: “Well, last week we had a horrible argument.”

Q: “What part of the argument bothers you most?”

Tapping on the most intense feelings about the argument (i.e. feeling angry, feeling unloved,

unappreciated etc.) will be the most effective way to handle this issue. As you tap for specific

things that have contributed to the issue, the global problem becomes lighter and eventually

may be completely resolved. Try asking questions like:

• What specific event does this remind you of?

◦ Pick one.

• Who in your life makes you feel this way?

◦ Focus on an incident with this person where you really felt this strongly.

• How long have you felt this way? When did it start?

If you can’t come up with a specific event, you can create one that would have been typical.


This will usually bring up the feelings, which is all it takes to tune in and apply EFT. For

instance, let's say that when you were growing up, your mother was always telling you how

difficult is was to give birth to you. Now imagine how this would have typically happened.

• What words did she use?

• What did her face look like while she spoke to you?

• Did she make any hand gestures while she spoke?

It doesn't matter whether you know something really happened this way or not, the event

that you tune into is real to you as you imagine it because this is what your perception of this

of what might have happened.

3. Shifting Aspects

Aspects are different parts or details of a problem. They can be specific things that upset us

or they may be different layers of emotion that emerge as we tap. People don’t always realize

that they have shifted aspects. For instance, you may still feel upset after several rounds of

tapping -- but are you still upset about the same thing? What is bothering you now? For

instance, if you are tapping for a birth phobia, you might tap for the sight of a snake, then the

slithering of its movement, then its beady eyes, etc... To determine which aspect of the

problem should be addressed ask the following:

• What bothers you the most about this? What else bothers you about this?

• What details do you see when you think about it?

• What still bothers you about this?

4. Two Useful Techniques: “The Movie Technique” and “Tell The Story Technique”

When working with a specific event, these following approaches can help you sneak up on

intense issues. Begin by giving the situation a name and using that title to address the

intensity before ever going into the story of what happened. Be sure to ask questions like:

• If this event were a movie (or a story), what would the title be?

• When you think of the title, how does that make you feel?

• If you were to run the movie in your mind (or go through the story), how intense do

you think that would be for you?

• How many scenes are in your movie?

Do several rounds of EFT on “this ___________ movie” or “this _____ story” to reduce the

intensity before going through the full movie or story. When you are ready, begin to go

through the movie or tell the story as if you had never told it before.

• Start at the beginning and stop whenever you feel any intensity.

• Stop and tap, each time there is intense feeling, tap on that piece of the story until the

intensity has released.

• Next, rewind the movie a little and go through that part again.

• What does it feel like now?


• Tap again for any remaining intensity and then proceed with the story...

• Once you have been through the whole story, tell your story again, being mindful of

remaining intensity. Sometimes you will come up with details you didn’t think of the

first time through. Keep going through this movie or story, pausing to tap for any

disturbing details, until the movie or story no longer has any negative emotional charge

to it. Notice how neutral you feel about the event now and how this feels in your body.

• Rewind and start over again to test your results, this time exaggerating the memory as

much as possible to see if you can get your upset about the original event. Tap on an

remaining intensity and take time to notice how you feel once you are done tapping.

5. Testing Your Work

A great way to test is to revisit what was bothering you so much in the first place. Say the

original problem out loud and notice how that makes you feel. How does it feel to imagine

the original upsetting situation. What are you still bothered by? If your uncomfortable

emotions comes from a specific memory, talk about the memory as if you were telling a story.

Stop if you feel intense (this is called “Tell the Story Technique”). The portion of the story that

is making you intense is a new aspect. Tap for that aspects until you have no intensity and go

through the story again, now ask yourself: how does it feel to go through the entire story?

6. The Importance of Persistence

Although EFT often yields impressively rapid results, some of the deepest and most lasting

healing is achieved by being persistent with tapping over time. Many of life’s issues are

complex and multi-layered. It may take time – to achieve the resolution we seek. Patience is

key. Serious medical conditions will often require long-term support with EFT, as they involve

many emotional components. Keep tapping as often as possible, for different aspects. Try

approaching things from different angles, and asking more questions that may lead to core

issues. Persistence really can make all the difference!

7. Sneaking Up On Intense Issues

If you anticipate that a certain issue is going to be very intense, tap for your feelings before

actually focusing on the upsetting issue. If you dread having to think about, or talk about, a

certain memory related to the upsetting issue - use tapping to calm your intensity down and

put yourself at ease before actually facing the intense issue. After tapping, you will be much

less upset as you talk about the issue itself. Never force yourself to proceed until you are

comfortable doing so. If intense feelings come up anyway, you may be so tuned in to the issue

that words may not be necessary. Just tap all the points over and over and keep breathing

deeply while tapping until the uncomfortable feelings subside. Here are some examples of Set-

Up and Reminder Phrases that can help you sneak up on intense issues:

Set-Up Phrase: “Even though I can’t think about this because it would upset me...”

Reminder Phrase: “It would upset me too much...”


8. Cognitive Shifts

We may not always realize that we are beginning to see our situation differently. EFT helps

create “cognitive shifts,” or changes in our thinking, our attitude, or our perspective. Ask

yourself: “Has anything changed in the way this whole thing looks to me now” and “How

might I see this (or myself) differently now?” A cognitive shift has happened when we:

• See the other person’s point of view for the first time

• Have more compassion for ourselves

• Know that we did the best we could

• See the bigger picture

• See ourselves differently

9. Physical Issues

Most physical issues have an emotional component. To understand this concept, try working

only on the emotional pieces of a physical problem and see what kind of results you get. Good

questions to ask:

• If there were an emotion involved in this physical problem, what might it be? What

have you been going through lately?

• What was going on in your life when this physical problem first started?

• How does having this illness or pain make you feel?

• If your knee, back, or stomach could speak to you, what might it say?

• Is there anyone or anything in your life that’s a pain in the neck for you?

Consider that our bodies are living, breathing metaphors for emotional states. Loss of self-

expression or self-esteem of any kind may need to be investigated when working with any

physical issue. Go back several weeks or months to when the issue first started. Think to

yourself “What haven’t I been saying?” Language offers us many hints around ways physical

pain or discomfort might be related to emotional issues, like the “pain in the neck” and other

body parts. You could be:

• “Pissed off” at someone or some situation = bladder infection

• Bending over backwards (too much in order to please others) = back pain

• Irritated by somebody or some situation = skin rash, eczema, dermatitis

• Heartbroken = heart disease, heart problems

• Suffocated by somebody or a situation = asthma

• Carrying burdens or too much responsibility = tightness in neck and shoulders

• Not allowed to speak your mind, share your opinions = throat problems

• Stuck in rigid, stiff thinking = stiffness in any body part

• Sick with fear and dread = stomach problems or intestinal upset

• Sick of hearing the complaints/criticisms directed at you/around you = earache, hearing loss


10. Intuition

When practicing EFT, you are part of the equation. Whether you’re giving a session or doing

EFT on yourself, what is coming to mind during the process is probably important. Any

hunches or intuitive thoughts or feelings that arise are worth your attention and exploration,

and may even be worth throwing into the Set-Up phrasing. Keep in mind, if you are working

with another person, it is most respectful to ask whether your intuitive guess feels right to

them. When in doubt, ask.

11. Surrogate Tapping

Surrogate Tapping is tapping on your own body on behalf of another. This could be another

person, a child, or even an animal. Imagining that you are feeling what another is feeling can

be deeply connective and healing for everyone. For example, as a parent you can use

surrogate tapping on your baby. If your baby is crying and you cannot figure out exactly why

(all obvious needs have been taken care of i.e. diaper change, fed, burped, etc) you can tune in

to what you imagine it might feel like to be a tiny crying baby, and tap on your own body. In

this case, while performing the Set-Up, use language that describes the emotions that your

baby might possibly be feeling: “Even though I am scared and I don't even know why...Even

though I feel like no one can help me... Even though I am completely powerless and I don't

know what to do with myself...mommy and daddy love me very much...” After several rounds,

your baby may visibly relax. The baby may accept traditional soothing techniques more easily

(if the baby baby was previously too upset to be swaddled or rocked, the baby may now be

more receptive to these strategies). Don't forget to tap on yourself for whatever

uncomfortable feelings you are experiencing as a parent!

12. Core Issues

If we pay attention to the thoughts and feelings that arise during tapping for any issue, this

emotional trail will often lead us into the actual core of the problem. A few simple questions

can take the session much deeper, and perhaps reveal the emotions, thoughts or beliefs that

are driving the whole problem. The best way to uncover core issues is to keeping asking:

“What does this remind me of?” Whatever comes to mind is worth exploring. You may not

consciously know what the core issue is, but this simple question will uncover clues. Even if we

think we’ve already worked on the issue, there may be many layers, including issues of

identity (limiting beliefs) that have yet to be thoroughly addressed. After a round of tapping,

always pay attention to your thoughts and feelings. What comes to mind?

• When was the first time you can remember feeling that same kind of feeling?

• When was one of the worst times that you felt this?

• If anyone in your life contributed to this problem, who might that be?

• If there were a deeper emotion underlying this problem, what might it be?

• If you could live your life over again, what person or event would you prefer to skip?

• In what way might you be identified with this problem?

• Could this problem be protecting old ideas about who you think you are?


If your answer is, “I don’t know,” just take a guess - your subconscious mind does know

and your guesses will usually be right on target.

13. “Tail-enders”

Finding our way to identifying how we would rather feel (or where we would rather be) can

contribute mightily to the healing process. Encouraging our ability to see the light at the end

of the tunnel can help give us a goal worth attaining, get our minds around the idea that we

do not have to be stuck, and literally take us one step closer to living our dreams. On the flip

side, connecting with the energy of a positive goal can bring up all kinds of negative thoughts

and feelings for us. Luckily we have EFT to help us disarm the powerful “yes, but” statements

or tail-enders that threaten to derail our plans. It is helpful to view tail-enders not as by-

products of self sabotage, but as protective parts of us, convinced that change is dangerous

and unsafe. With persistent tapping and focused attention we acknowledge our insecurities,

give ourselves a way to reach for thoughts that feel better. The following exercise can bring

clarity to any behaviors that may be sabotaging your progress. Always ask “What beliefs about

you (or the world) might these tail-enders be protecting?”

• Identify a positive goal:

◦ I want to feel comfortable and confident during labor. I want to have a short, easy

birth experience and I want to painlessly and naturally give birth to my child.

• Imagine how it would feel to really live out your vision:

◦ I am confident in my body's ability and I feel comfortable in my birthing

environment.

• Notice any “yes, but” statements or tail-enders that come up:

◦ “Yes, but I'm afraid the doctors at the hospital will want to intervene.”

◦ “Yes, but I’m still convinced that the contraction will hurt. I’m afraid be able to

handle the pain and I will ask for an epidural.”

• Apply EFT to each “yes, but” statement that comes up – and keep doing it for each

specific issue you have, gently following the emotional trail.

14. The Generalization Effect

After you address a few related specific events with EFT, the process starts to generalize over

the entire global issue, and the emotional charge of whole problem may seem to collapse. For

instance, if you witnessed a traumatic birth and you tap to heal and neutralize the emotions

for several of the worst details of that birth, the healing may generalize and spread over the

entirety of your feelings about labor and birth. Even incidents that you have not addressed

with EFT may be much less upsetting or even neutral. War veterans with hundreds of

traumatic memories have reported that after tapping for 5 or 6 of the worst memories, most

of their remaining terrible memories seem distant and no longer painful. Once you have

successfully used EFT to clear yourself of emotional intensity when focusing on a specific

upsetting event, you can test your results by thinking of something else traumatic or upsetting

that happened, something similar - does that event bother you like it used to?


If EFT Doesn’t Seem to Be Working

1. You are not being specific enough.

Be sure you are identifying very specific feelings, body sensations, memories, or limiting

beliefs, etc... For instance, when working with a limiting belief you can ask yourself, “How true

does this feel?” If it feels true, you may need to be very persistent and get at all the reasons

why you are convinced it’s true. “I believe birthing will be painful because ___________.”

You can try to remember any bad experiences you may have witnessed that may have

contributed to your present day belief - even if you think you are completely those

experiences. As you revisit these and tap, you may be surprised at the emotions that arise.

2. There may be a deeper core issue that has not been reached.

Keep exploring to find core issues by continuing to ask appropriate questions that allow you to

follow the emotional trail. More core issue questions:

• What is still bothering you about __________, in the present moment?

• What is the deepest root of this problem? Just guess.

• Is there anything you feel like you will never get over?

• What is your biggest problem right now?

3. Some part of you is holding on to the problem.

Sometimes, for whatever reason, a part of us does not want things to change. Parts of us that

are resistant to change are often protecting us in some way. We may be protecting an old

identity or an unconscious need to feel a certain way. How might parts of you be protecting

you from the effects of change? Ask the following:

• What are you getting out of this? What is the advantage of keeping this problem?

• Who are you getting to be because of this? Who would have to be without this issue?

• Are you getting to express something because of this?

• If some part of you didn’t want this to change, what would that part have to gain?

Feel free to try some of the following for your EFT Set-Up Phrases:

• “Even though some part of me is protecting me by holding onto this…”

• “Even though it wouldn't be fair for me to move on…”

• “Even though it isn’t safe for me to get over this problem...”

• “Even though I really don’t deserve to get over this problem...”

• “Even though it's not right to give myself permission to let this go…”

• “Even though some part of me is comfortable with the way things are…”

• “Even though I’m afraid I might hurt someone if I allow myself to get over this…”

Your identity may feel threatened because carrying this problem is all you’ve ever known. Who

do you believe you are because of this problem? Sometimes it helps to “sleep on it” and see

how it all feels the next day – in many cases you'll have accomplished more than you think...


Conclusion

This guide has been designed to show you how to apply EFT effectively – but it is not enough

to read this guide by itself – you have to try EFT for yourself! In fact EFT enthusiasts can often

times be quoted as saying: “Try it on everything!” You can apply EFT to any and all problems:

the annoying and uncomfortable kind you encounter in a typical day and the kind that have

been around for a long time and don't seem like they're going anywhere. Applying EFT to your

own personal issues can help you neutralize the negative thoughts, beliefs, and emotions that

are weighing you down - a process every part of your life can benefit from.

An EFT practitioner can help you get started if you are having trouble. Complex issues are

oftentimes resolved more quickly with the assistance of a practitioner. Schedule your free EFT

consultation today at http://www.FertilityPregnancyBirth.com/contact.html.

eft for pregnancy and birthing - wordpress.com · • relieve stress and promote general relaxation...

Documents