duke policy bridge with dean storelli · style: lessons in clarity and grace 10/e, williams and...

Policy Brief Workshop DUKE POLICY BRIDGE

WITH DEAN STORELLI

Overview of Best Practices and GuidelinesWriter’s Workshop: Draft Section of Your Brief

Upcoming Event

What Makes a Policy Brief?•Clear policy message

•Brevity

•Audience-centered

•Expertise and data

Example

Things to Consider

Audience

Audience•Who are you writing for?

• Elected officials• Legislative staff• Policy area specialists• Agency policy experts• (Other academics)

•Take a Moment. Ask who your audience is.• Knowledge, Duties, Concerns, Limitations

What is your message for your audience?

That’s Your Theme•Message to your audience

•Title of the Brief

•If you’re already working from a paper, it’s going to be the main idea found in your abstract, introduction, and conclusion.

•Take a Moment to Write Your Title

Research Paper to Policy Brief Cycle1. Identify your theme

◦ What is the policy message?

2. Select 3-5 Key Supporting Messages

3. Assign Data to Each Key Messages

4. Compose Brief Sections for Each Message

5. Write Conclusion and Background

6. Design and Layout

Choosing Supporting Messages

•Arguments that make your message convincing

•Section Headings of the Brief

• Explanations crafted with the counter arguments in mind are strongest




3. Assign Data to Each Key Message




What Data Do I Include?

•Don’t write data. Show data.

•Graphs and Infographic of the Brief

•Storytelling within 5 pages or less

Composing a Brief Section • Where your style editing comes into play

•Body Paragraph of Each Key Message

•Same Structure as Brief Overall• Clear policy message• Brevity • Audience-centered• Expertise and data

Conclusion & Background

•Front and Last Page of Brief

•TLDR: too long; didn’t read

•Tell them what they need to know

•Tell them what they need to do







6. Design and Layout (Template)

Policy Bridge Template

•Presentation and Organization of Brief

•Policy Bridge Template is available as a resource• Accessed on Policy Bridge site to aid in design and formatting

Brief Distribution & Placement•Best Ways to Share Brief Varies

• Schedule an appointment with me: [email protected]• Social Media

• Tweet. Place on you webpage

•Scholars@Duke• Upload your completed briefs on Elements

• Elements.duke.edu

mailto:[email protected]

http://www.elements.duke.edu/

A Few Key Things •Time: never overestimate what your audience will read

Page Count, Word Count, Organization, and Graphics

•AttitudesData and Tone (Word Choice) Tone: Diplomatic vs. Zealous

Threaten, increase (insert term), negatively impact, improve vs. Jeopardize, endanger, destroy, rectify, skyrocketAdverbs and superlatives (very, too, extremely, most) horrible, worst, best

•ExpertiseWord Choice (Jargon), Page Count, Word Count, and Data

•Ownership• Author and contact information

Follow-up and future engagement

Writer’s Workshop

Style Overview•Style editing (not copyediting)•Not “voice,” not fashion

•“Top-heavy” organization•Clarity (sentences)•Focus/flow (paragraphs)•Emphasis

Why Is This Necessary? (Option 1)•“Sokal Affair”

• An “experiment” to test if a journal would “to publish an article liberally salted with nonsense if (a) it sounded good and (b) it flattered the editors' ideological preconceptions"

•Library test

Why Is This Necessary? (Option 2)•Writing about ideas is different than arguing for a specific action

Point #1:Top-Heavy (Re)-Organization

At the beginning, readers want to know…•What do you recommend?•What is the problem?•Why am I reading this???

•Introduction•Shared context (common ground)•Problem•Cost•Preview

•Sections•Each section needs an intro

How? Introductions

Examples

“College Drinking”

The creation of the Eurozone has done much to lower the costs of starting and operating new business. Unfortunately, in Genovia the cost of starting new businesses has become prohibitively high. Every month, Genovia loses the opportunity to see new businesses started in an economy that desperately needs new life. Its GDP has dropped every year for the past eight, and the government’s debt continues to climb. The Ministry of Finance, which oversees the regulatory system that governs new businesses, needs to overhaul its own structure and make its officers more accessible, lower fees and simplify the paperwork it currently demands from Genovia’s entrepreneurs.

“Doing Business in Genovia”The creation of the Eurozone has done much to lower the costs of starting and operating new business. Unfortunately, in Genovia the cost of starting new businesses has become prohibitively high. Every month, Genovia loses the opportunity to see new businesses started in an economy that desperately needs new life. Its GDP has dropped every year for the past eight, and the government’s debt continues to climb. The Ministry of Finance, which oversees the regulatory system that governs new businesses, needs to overhaul its own structure and make its officers more accessible, lower fees and simplify the paperwork it currently demands from Genovia’s entrepreneurs.




•Write or re-write•Overall introduction•Section introductions

•Share with partner.•How do they compare? Which has more power? Which one can you read more quickly?

Exercise

Point #2:Sentence Clarity – Characters and

Actions

In every sentence, readers need to know…•What is happening?•Who is doing what?

Example: ClarityOnce upon a time, as a walk through the woods was taking place on the part of Little Red Riding Hood, the Wolf’s jump out from behind a tree occurred, causing her fright.1

During the 1980s, as expenditure increases were taking place, a frightening poverty rate increase occurred.

1 Style: Lessons in Clarity and Grace 10/e, Williams and Colomb, 2010.

The Principle? Actor => Subject Action => Verb

Clarity AppliedOnce upon a time, as Little Red Riding Hood was walking through the wood, the Wolf jumped out from behind a tree and frightened her.1

During the 1980s, as the government was increasing expenditures, the poverty rate increased, frightening officials.

1 Style: Lessons in Clarity and Grace 10/e, Williams and Colomb, 2010.

“Flesh-and-Blood”(People & Organizations)

the governmentthe president

the World Bankresearchers

some scholars

Principles, Ideas

freedomdevelopmentthe economy

capacity

Events

the financial crisislast year’s floods

the warthis election

Three Kinds of Characters

No right is more basic to a free society than freedom of speech. Free speech served the left in the 1960s when it protested the Vietnam War, and it is now used by the right when it claims that speech includes contributions to political organizations. The doctrine of free speech has been embraced by all sides to…. 4

4 Examples from Williams, p. 51.

Abstractions Done Right…

The argument is this. The cognitive component of intention exhibits a high degree of complexity. Intention is temporally divisible into two: prospective intention and immediate intention. The cognitive function of prospective intention is a representation of a subject’s similar past actions, his current situation, and his course of future actions. That is, the cognitive component of prospective intention is a plan. The cognitive function of immediate intention is the monitoring and guidance of ongoing bodily movement.

Abstractions Done Wrong…

•Use “flesh-and-blood” characters as much as possible

•Turn abstractions into “virtual” characters that tell a story

•For unfamiliar abstractions, avoid using other abstractions

•Use generic doers: researchers, critics, people, we….

Abstractions as Characters

The argument is this. The cognitive component of intention exhibits a high degree of complexity. Intention is temporally divisible into two: prospective intention and immediate intention. The cognitive function of prospective intention is a representation of a subject’s similar past actions, his current situation, and his course of future actions. That is, the cognitive component of prospective intention is a plan. The cognitive function of immediate intention is the monitoring and guidance of ongoing bodily movement.

The argument is this. The cognitive component of intentionexhibits a high degree of complexity. Intention is temporally divisible into two: prospective intention and immediate intention. The cognitive function of prospective intention is a representation of a subject’s similar past actions, his current situation, and his course of future actions. That is, the cognitive component of prospective intention is a plan. The cognitive function of immediate intention is the monitoringand guidance of ongoing bodily movement.

Abstractions Done Wrong…

I argue this about intention. It has a complex cognitive component that we can divide into two temporal kinds: prospective and immediate. We use the first kind, prospective intention, to represent how we have acted in our past, how we are acting in the present and how we will act in the future. That is, we use prospective intention to help us plan. We use the other kind of cognition, immediate intention, to monitor and guide our bodies as we move them.

Why Is This Better?

Effects of Good Sentence Style?• Clarity• Simplicity• Efficiency

•“They decided.”•“They made a decision.”•“A decision was made by them.”

• Better policy – “Who is doing what?”

•Look back at your writing•Re-write any sentences with missing actors/actions•Re-write any passages that do not discuss abstractions well

Exercise

Point #3:Focus and Flow - Paragraphs

In every paragraph, readers need to know…• What is the main idea?

Among of the main causes of uneven regional development and immigration is unemployment. The immigrants’ receptor areas are basically La Paz-El Alto, Santa Cruz and Tarija. La Paz is the administrative capital of Bolivia, and it contains El Alto, which was converted to an industry city and serves as a nexus, connecting La Paz with the rest of Bolivia. Santa Cruz is also a center of industry and commerce. In the past two year since the law regarding the benefits of the distribution of the rents of hydrocarbons to producers, less urbanized areas have been increasing their importance as receptor cities for immigrants.

Sample #1

Among of the main causes of uneven regional development and immigration is unemployment, and the current unemployment rate is high. The latest figures report….

In Bolivia, all the cities that have become the primary receptor areas for immigrants – La Paz-El Alto, Santa Cruz and Tarija – are all business centers. La Paz is the administrative capital of Bolivia, and it contains El Alto, which was converted to an industry city and serves as a nexus, connecting La Paz with the rest of Bolivia. Santa Cruz is also a center of industry and commerce.

In the past two year since the law regarding the benefits of the distribution of the rents of hydrocarbons to producers, less urbanized areas have also been increasing their importance as receptor cities for immigrants….

Sample #1 - Better

Start sentences with information that is familiar to your readers.

◦ Option 1: Start each sentence with your main topic (focus)

◦ Option 2: Start each sentence with a newly introduced idea (flow)

The solution for unfocused paragraphs…

Examplea. Consistent ideas toward the beginning of sentenceshelp readers understand what a passage is generally about. A sense of coherence arises when a sequence of topics comprises a narrow set of related ideas. But the context of each sentence is lost by seemingly random shifts of topics. Unfocused paragraphs result when that happens.

b. Readers understand what a passage is generally about when they see consistent ideas toward the beginnings of sentences, especially in their subjects. They feel a passage is coherent when they read a sequence of topics that focuses on a narrow set of related ideas. But when topics shift randomly, readers lose the context of each sentence. When that happens, they feel they are reading paragraphs that are unfocused and unorganized.

•Rewrite so that the same 1 or 2 topics are named at the beginning of most sentences.

•Avoid distractions at the beginning of sentences.•Move new/complex information to the end of sentences.•Use the passive if necessary.

•Exception: “Topic sentences” at the beginning of a paragraph often name the topic at the end of the sentence.

Exercise 5.2 - 1. and 3.

Possible Answers

1. Using “plants” as the main topic

Except for those areas covered by ice or scorched by continual heat, the earth is covered by vegetation. Plants grow most richly in fertilized plains and river valleys, but they also grow at the edge of perpetual snow in high mountains. Dense vegetation grows in the ocean and around its edges as well as in and around lakes and swamps. Plants grow in cracks of busy city sidewalks as well as on seemingly barren cliffs. Vegetation covered the earth before humans existed and will cover the earth long after we have been swallowed up by evolutionary history.

Possible Answers

1. Using “plants” as the main topic

Except for those areas covered by ice or scorched by continual heat, the earth is covered by vegetation. Plantsgrow most richly in fertilized plains and river valleys, but they also grow at the edge of perpetual snow in high mountains. Dense vegetation grows in the ocean and around its edges as well as in and around lakes and swamps. Plants grow in cracks of busy city sidewalks as well as on seemingly barren cliffs. Vegetation covered the earth before humans existed and will cover the earth long after we have been swallowed up by evolutionary history.

Possible Answers

3. Using Jones as the main topic…

Jones (1985) stressed the importance of language skills in children’s problem-solving ability. He reports that improvement in language skills also leads to improvement in nonverbal problem solving. It is his belief that previously acquired language habits allow children to articulate problems and activate prior knowledge and are the cause of this better performance. His research suggests, therefore, exploring the use of systematic practice in the verbal formulation of nonlinguistic problems prior to attempting their solution as an avenue for enhancing problem solving in general.

Possible Answers

3. Using Jones as the main topic…and language skills assecondary topic

Jones (1985) stressed the importance of language skills in children’s problem-solving ability. He reports that improvement in language skills also leads to improvement in nonverbal problem solving. It is his belief that previously acquired language habits allow children to articulate problems and activate prior knowledge and are the cause of this better performance. His research suggests, therefore, exploring the use of systematic practice in the verbal formulation of nonlinguistic problems prior to attempting their solution as an avenue for enhancing problem solving in general.

Possible Answers

3. Using Jones as the main topic, language skills as asecondary topic… and adding some clarity.

Jones (1985) stressed the importance of language skills in children’s problem-solving ability. He reports that improvement in language skills also leads to improvement in nonverbal problem solving. It is his belief that previously acquired language habits allow children to articulate problems and activate prior knowledge and are the cause of this better performance. His research suggests, therefore, training teachers to help students talk about math and other nonlinguistic problems prior to asking students to solve these problems as a way to enhance problem solving in general.

Possible Answers

3. Using Jones as the main topic, language skills as secondary,adding some clarity… and (finally) spelling out implications.

Jones (1985) stressed the importance of language skills in children’s problem-solving ability. He reports that improvement in language skills also leads to improvement in nonverbal problem solving. It is his belief that previously acquired language habits allow children to articulate problems and activate prior knowledge and are the cause of this better performance. His research suggests, therefore, training teachers to help students talk about math and other nonlinguistic problems prior to asking students to solve these problems as a way to enhance problem solving in general. For the Department of Education, this research suggests funding the development of math and science curriculums that include more verbal practice and more written problem solving techniques.

•Readers are less worried about monotony than writers.•Do not change subjects just to make them different.•On the other hand, do not use the exact same wording to start every phrase in every sentence.

An Unnecessary Worry

Start sentences with information that is familiar to your readers.

◦ Option 1: Start each sentence with your main topic (focus)

◦ Option 2: Start each sentence with a newly introduced idea (flow)

The solution for unfocused paragraphs…

( S e n t e n c e 1 ) ( S e n t e n c e 2 ) ( S e n t e n c e 3 )

Old -> New. Old -> New. Old -> New.

The basis of our American democracy – equal opportunity for all – is being threatened by college costs that have been rising fast for the last several years. Increases in family income have been significantly outpaced by increases in tuition at our colleges and universities during that period. Only children of the wealthiest families in our society will be able to afford a college education if this trend continues. Knowledge and intellectual skills, in addition to wealth, will divide us as a people, when that happens. Equal opportunity and the egalitarian basis of our democracy could be eroded by such a divide.2

2This paragraph and many of the others examples in this presentation are from Joseph William and Gregory Colomb’s Style: Lessons in Clarity and Grace 10/e. Copyright © 2010 by Pearson Education, Inc.

The Old->New Pattern

In the last several years, college costs have been rising so fast that they are threatening the basis of our American democracy – equal opportunity for all for. During that period, tuition has significantly outpaced increases in family income. If this trend continues, only the children of the wealthiest families in our society will be able to afford a college education. When that happens, we will be divided as a people not only by wealth, but by knowledge and intellectual skills. Such a divide will erode equal opportunity and the egalitarian basis of our democracy.

Using the Passive

1a. A black hole is created by the collapse of a dead star into a point perhaps no larger than a marble.

1b. The collapse of a dead star into a point perhaps no larger than a marble creates a black hole.

CONTEXT:Some astonishing questions about the nature of the universe have been raised by scientists exploring the nature of black holes in space. _____(Sentence 1a or 1b?)_____ So much matter compressed into so little volume changes the fabric of space around it in profoundly puzzling ways.

Exercise 5.1 (modified) 1. and 2.

Possible Answers: 1)

1. When the president assumed office, he had two aims—the recovery of the American economy and the modernization of America into a military power. He succeeded in the first as testified by the drop in unemployment figures and inflation and the increase in the GNP. But he had less success with the second, as indicated by our increased involvement in international conflict without any clear set of political goals. Nevertheless, the American voter was pleased by the increases in the military budget and a good deal of saber rattling.

Possible Answers: 2) – Option 1

2. Our report highlights potential new areas for Abco’s profitability, particularly growth in Asian markets. The key to these markets will be increased revenue returns along several dimensions, including product type, end-use and distribution channels. According to our projections, distribution channels in China, in particular, will be critical to the growth prospects of Abco’s newest product lines. The introduction of these products will need a range of innovative strategies.

Possible Answers: 2) – Option 2

2. Our report highlights potential new areas for Abco’sprofitability, particularly growth in Asian markets. Our analysis is based on revenue returns along several dimensions, including product type, end-use and distribution channels. According to our projections, Abco’s newest product lines will depend most on its ability to develop distribution channels in China. We suggest that new products be introduced using a range of innovative strategies.

•Do not use also, additionally or moreover …• Just mean “here is something else I have to say.”

•Use consequently or therefore …•To summarize but only a few times per page.

•Use however or but …•To show contrast but only a few times per page.

Faked Cohesion

For paragraphs…Use the beginning of sentencesto control FOCUS and FLOW

◦ FOCUS: a consistent topic string◦ FLOW: old -> new pattern

Depending on how you choose…

A very “f lowy” style. A very style.

Bonus: Emphasis

In the last several years, college costs have been rising so fast that they are threatening the basis of our American democracy – equal opportunity for all. During that period, tuition has significantly outpaced increases in family income. If this trend continues, only the children of the wealthiest families in our society will be able to afford a college education. When that happens, we will be divided as a people not only by wealth, but by knowledge and intellectual skills. Such a divide will erode equal opportunity and the egalitarian basis of our democracy.

1. Choose a method….a) Can you write one word or one phrase that captures…

◦ The main idea?◦ The story (narrative flow)?

b) Underline the first 5 or 6 words of each sentence (or clause). Do most sentences start with…

◦ The main topic?◦ A previous idea?

2. Edit to correct.

3. Ask a partner to double check changes or help you find a problem area.

Last Exercise

WARNING

Writing is a process◦ Exploring…

capturing… “writing”and connecting ideas

Editing is a different process◦ Reorganizing, reformatting, correcting and refining style “editing”

duke policy bridge with dean storelli · style: lessons in clarity and grace 10/e, williams and...

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