Download - What They Didn’t Tell You About Teaching
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What they didn’t tell you
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Except you still marking
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You suddenly find yourself saying
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“I can’t not on a school night”
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“Friends become distant acquaintances
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That you catch up with Christmas and Birthdays
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You find yourself telling people the same thing in three different ways
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When it’s the end of term
When it’s the
end of term
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You won’t be doing this
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You will be doing this
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Or this
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Teaching is like being a comedian
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Your audience expects to be entertained
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So expect heckling at every opportunity
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Punters to talk over
you
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Continual trips to the loo
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The aroma of stale B.O.
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Rustling of stashed
crisp packets
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And if you are really nervous
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They CAN smell your fear
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And will turn into this
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You must always be positive
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Even when you want to
do this
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When you go shopping
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Spotting you will be
the highlight of their day
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Except they don’t want
your autograph
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They are just amazed you are actually a real person
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If you are really hated or loved it will like having your own paparazzi
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With your shopping trip documented on You Tube
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So drive 40 miles away if you want any of these
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Or these
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And you will need to find alternatives to swear words
Fudge it!
Shoot
Oh Billiards
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And learn a whole new version of the English language
You gypsy Chav
That’s so gay
Minger
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But there are positives!
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You get to watch interesting student debates
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Attend inspiring meetings
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Enjoy the thrill of not being listened too all day
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Being spoken to like a piece of …
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Endure teenage hormones that even parents don’t want to put up with
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Have your performance constantly measured
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But the ultimate in pleasure has to be . .
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Just when you get teaching
sussed out
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You get a new
Government initiative
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That was ditched 15 years ago for what reason?
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So why teach?
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For love?
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For respect?
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For money?
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The excellent pension?
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NO ?
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Well there is a credit crunch!
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And finally what do you call a group
of like minded
teachers?
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A whinge!