Download - Teachers as guidance counselors
Guidance & CounselingGuidance & Counseling
Strengthening Homeroom Strengthening Homeroom ProgramProgram
Facilitating Homeroom Facilitating Homeroom ActivitiesActivities
forfor
Joaquin Smith National High SchoolJoaquin Smith National High School
ROLANDO F. MALAFU, MAEd, RGCROLANDO F. MALAFU, MAEd, RGC
WHO AM I WHO AM I
1ST QUESTION
I KNOW I DON’T KNOW
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PUBLIC SELFPUBLIC SELF
I KNOW I DON’T KNOW
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PUBLIC SELFPUBLIC SELF BLIND SPOTBLIND SPOT
I KNOW I DON’T KNOW
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PUBLIC SELFPUBLIC SELF BLIND SPOTBLIND SPOT
PRIVATE SELFPRIVATE SELF
I KNOW I DON’T KNOW
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PUBLIC SELFPUBLIC SELF BLIND SPOTBLIND SPOT
PRIVATE SELFPRIVATE SELF
UNKNOWNUNKNOWN
I KNOW I DON’T KNOW
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PUBLIC SELFPUBLIC SELF BLIND SPOTBLIND SPOT
PRIVATE SELFPRIVATE SELF
HIDDENHIDDEN
POTENTIALSPOTENTIALS
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PUBLIC SELFPUBLIC SELF BLIND SPOTBLIND SPOT
PRIVATE PRIVATE
SELFSELF
HIDDENHIDDEN
POTENTIALSPOTENTIALS
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KNOW YOURSELF
The foundation of a successful homeroom The foundation of a successful homeroom Guidance ProgramGuidance Program
a very clear understanding a very clear understanding
of who we are of who we are
God has graciously gifted everyone with a God has graciously gifted everyone with a unique mix of skills, strengths and unique mix of skills, strengths and
limitations that must be understood and limitations that must be understood and maximally used in everyone’s lifetime. maximally used in everyone’s lifetime.
Gaining clarity about Gaining clarity about yourself yourself
helps you make better helps you make better decisions when challenges decisions when challenges
and opportunities emergeand opportunities emerge
The ULTIMATE GOAL The ULTIMATE GOAL
– that we would be an – that we would be an instrument to one’s growth instrument to one’s growth
and developmentand development
We are but instrumentsWe are but instruments
An Emerging Common An Emerging Common SituationSituation
The Situation: Nena is pregnantThe Situation: Nena is pregnant
1.1. Nena’s unexpressed reasonsNena’s unexpressed reasons
2.2. Other people’s suspected Other people’s suspected reasonsreasons
3.3. Curses Nena will possibly hearCurses Nena will possibly hear
4.4. Words of comfort for NenaWords of comfort for Nena
Discouraging Facts About Discouraging Facts About Guidance & Counseling and Guidance & Counseling and other Helping Relationshipsother Helping Relationships
It is time-consuming. It is time-consuming. It is emotionally tiring.It is emotionally tiring. It is physically exhausting.It is physically exhausting. It is frequently unsuccessful because we It is frequently unsuccessful because we
cannot impose on them what can be cannot impose on them what can be perceived as the best and swift solution.perceived as the best and swift solution.
It looks unrewarding. It looks unrewarding.
Traits to DevelopTraits to Develop
Listener – active listeningListener – active listening
Objectivity – Unconditional Positive Objectivity – Unconditional Positive
RegardRegard
Skills to Internalize Skills to Internalize
Self-directionSelf-direction MirroringMirroring EmpathyEmpathy ReferralReferral
Dangers to Avoid Dangers to Avoid
• TransferenceTransference
• Counter-transferenceCounter-transference
• SympathySympathy
• Breach of ConfidentialityBreach of Confidentiality
• Breach of Privacy Breach of Privacy
THE EIGHT COMMANDMENTS:THE EIGHT COMMANDMENTS:
1. Be nonjudgmental1. Be nonjudgmental
2. be empathic 2. be empathic
3. don’t give personal advice3. don’t give personal advice
4. don’t begin with questions that begin with ‘why’4. don’t begin with questions that begin with ‘why’
5. don’t take responsibility for the other person’s 5. don’t take responsibility for the other person’s
problemproblem
6. don’t interpret (when a paraphrase will do)6. don’t interpret (when a paraphrase will do)
7. stick to the here and now7. stick to the here and now
8. deal with the feelings first.8. deal with the feelings first.
TYPICAL SITUATIONS THAT MAKE SOME TYPICAL SITUATIONS THAT MAKE SOME COUNSELORS UNEASYCOUNSELORS UNEASY
* You feel like you are going around in * You feel like you are going around in circles and not getting anywhere.circles and not getting anywhere.
-Solution: pick one area to concentrate -Solution: pick one area to concentrate on and not let the client get away from it.on and not let the client get away from it.
-if it gets to be too much of a problem, -if it gets to be too much of a problem, express your feelings-“we’re not getting express your feelings-“we’re not getting anywhere because you….’anywhere because you….’
TYPICAL SITUATIONS THAT MAKE SOME TYPICAL SITUATIONS THAT MAKE SOME COUNSELORS UNEASYCOUNSELORS UNEASY
The student starts crying. The student starts crying.
-reassure the client that its okay to cry-reassure the client that its okay to cry
The student becomes hystericalThe student becomes hysterical
-talk calmly-talk calmly
-ask whether he prefers to be alone for awhile or -ask whether he prefers to be alone for awhile or wishes to continue the session laterwishes to continue the session later
-be prepared for a rather lengthy session -be prepared for a rather lengthy session
TYPICAL SITUATIONS THAT MAKE SOME TYPICAL SITUATIONS THAT MAKE SOME COUNSELORS UNEASYCOUNSELORS UNEASY
You are attracted to the client, or the You are attracted to the client, or the client is attracted to you, or bothclient is attracted to you, or both
-clarify the nature of your relationship-clarify the nature of your relationship
A person wants to have someone to talk A person wants to have someone to talk to, rather than to work on problems. to, rather than to work on problems.
-if you want to accept this, fine-if you want to accept this, fine-if you don’t, be firm about being willing to talk -if you don’t, be firm about being willing to talk
about problems, but not being wiling just to talkabout problems, but not being wiling just to talk
CREED OF THE TEACHER AS COUNSELORCREED OF THE TEACHER AS COUNSELOR
People seek us out. They seek us out for People seek us out. They seek us out for very private and painful reasons. We very private and painful reasons. We must be able to tell them what we can must be able to tell them what we can offer. If only for the ethics of the situation, offer. If only for the ethics of the situation, people must have the right to know people must have the right to know beforehand our personal values and our beforehand our personal values and our objectives. objectives.
CREED OF THE TEACHER AS COUNSELORCREED OF THE TEACHER AS COUNSELOR
1. I will not agree to help you go off the edge. I 1. I will not agree to help you go off the edge. I will not agree to help you become a robotized will not agree to help you become a robotized normal and adjusted person. I will not help you normal and adjusted person. I will not help you stay and wallow in the cesspool of your own stay and wallow in the cesspool of your own making. All these go against my values. I will making. All these go against my values. I will help you become autonomous, more resistant help you become autonomous, more resistant to enculturation, more loving of yourself, more to enculturation, more loving of yourself, more excited, sensitive and full, more free to excited, sensitive and full, more free to continue becoming the authority of your own continue becoming the authority of your own living.living.
CREED OF THE TEACHER AS COUNSELORCREED OF THE TEACHER AS COUNSELOR
2. I cannot give you your dreams or fix you 2. I cannot give you your dreams or fix you up, simply because I cannot .up, simply because I cannot .
CREED OF THE TEACHER AS COUNSELORCREED OF THE TEACHER AS COUNSELOR
3. I cannot make you grow, or grow for you. 3. I cannot make you grow, or grow for you. You must grow for yourself.You must grow for yourself.
4. I cannot take away your pain or 4. I cannot take away your pain or loneliness.loneliness.
CREED OF THE TEACHER AS COUNSELORCREED OF THE TEACHER AS COUNSELOR
5. I will not sense your world for you, 5. I will not sense your world for you, evaluate your world for you, or tell you evaluate your world for you, or tell you what is best for you in your world, for you what is best for you in your world, for you have your own world and I have mine. have your own world and I have mine.
CREED OF THE TEACHER AS COUNSELORCREED OF THE TEACHER AS COUNSELOR
6.I cannot convince you of the crucial 6.I cannot convince you of the crucial choice of choosing the scary uncertainty choice of choosing the scary uncertainty of growing over the safe misery of not of growing over the safe misery of not growing.growing.
CREED OF THE TEACHER AS COUNSELORCREED OF THE TEACHER AS COUNSELOR
7. I want to be with you and know you as a 7. I want to be with you and know you as a rich and growing friend, yet I cannot get rich and growing friend, yet I cannot get close to you when you choose not to close to you when you choose not to grow.grow.
CREED OF THE TEACHER AS COUNSELORCREED OF THE TEACHER AS COUNSELOR
8.When I begin to care for you out of pity, 8.When I begin to care for you out of pity, when I begin to lose trust in you, then I when I begin to lose trust in you, then I am toxic, bad, inhibiting for you and you am toxic, bad, inhibiting for you and you for me.for me.
CREED OF THE TEACHER AS COUNSELORCREED OF THE TEACHER AS COUNSELOR
9.You bet, my helping is conditional; I will 9.You bet, my helping is conditional; I will be with you, I will hang on there with you be with you, I will hang on there with you as long as I continue to get even the as long as I continue to get even the slightest hints that you are still trying to slightest hints that you are still trying to grow.grow.
10.If you accept all of these, then perhaps 10.If you accept all of these, then perhaps we can help each other.we can help each other.
Last Few Words Last Few Words Just instrumentsJust instruments
Genuine serviceGenuine service
Towards one’s Towards one’s growth and growth and
development development
You Can Shine!!!