Q I have been invited to my bestfriend’s home for a special

lunch on her birthday. So far sogood, but my dilemma is that Ihave significantly reduced myintake of sugar and even carbs tomaintain my weight as I havePCOS. How can I skip dessert andcarb-rich foods like biryani andjalebi without offending my friendand her family?

- Mindful Teen

A. Hi, it’s good you are trying to find apolite way to manage this trickysituation. Check these pointers.

Inform in advance: Though you are notobliged to put every dish on your platebeing served at the party, it’s a courte-ous and practical thing to tell yourfriend about your dietary limitations inadvance. Explain it to her in detail why

staying off certain foods is crucial toyour health. She will understand your

point of view and perhaps also beprotective about you. Compliment the host: Let the

host know how much youenjoyed the meal. Acknowledge

the effort that went into themaking or arranging of the feast. If a

special dessert like a birthday cake isoffered to you, have a small bite insteadof rejecting it altogether, while stayingaway from other sugar-laden foods.Offer to pitch in: This is a great time tooffer help to your host. However, somehosts will welcome your assistancewhile others may prefer you to stayseated. Follow the host’s preference.

By SUNAIINAA A HAK, etiquette guide

“Life isn’t about finding yourself, life is about creating yourself” GEORGE BERNARD SHAW, AUTHOR 03POLISH YOUR SKILLS

ExpertSPEAK

Respect your neigh-bour’s personal space.

Be mindful if youborrow anything froma neighbour. Returnthe item after using it;if you break the item,replace it with a newone right away. If you have an issuewith a neighbour, godirectly to that personand discuss it clearly.

Not everyone is a dog orcat lover, so make sureyour pets don’t wander in

your neighbour’s backyardsand lawn. Keep them off theneighbour’s lawn and pick

up after them. Greet your neighboursduring festivals and other

special occasions. If you and a neighbourhave a misunderstanding,make an extra effort to

make things right by clear-ing the air so that thingsremain cordial. Team NIE

Neighbourhoods havechanged over the years.Earlier, peoplebrought basketsof sandwiches orsweets to newpeople on theblock. Nowsocialising isrestricting to justfriends. However, it’s still nice to have goodneighbour etiquette

HOW TO BE A GOOD NEIGHBOUR

We live in an overworked world where we don’tget enough time to communicate our feelingseffectively. From tight deadlines for schooland college projects to planning for career

and maintaining good social relations, most of us tend to bottleup difficult emotions like anger on a daily basis. Here are waysto identify triggers and deal with them in a healthy way

Whenever you feel a little too workedup and not in control of your emotions,get up and get moving. Yes, doing somemoderate exercise will certainlyhelp you vent your frus-tration without feelingthe need to yell at any-one. You don’t have tomake time for a fullexercise routine.Instead, focus on any-thing that gets yourheart racing and dis-tracts your mind.

If you are notable to find aplace to jog or run,you can also do somestretches or go for abrisk walk. TNN

GO FOR A JOG OR

WORKOUT

HOW TO MANAGE NEGATIVE

EMOTIONS

Irrespective ofwhat the self-help-quotes

claim on social media platforms, clampingdown your emotions is never a good idea. So,

whether it is a minor irritation or a pent-up grudge, it isalways better to let go of repressed anger. When you try to suppress negative emotions, it will resurface in different ways.

While we all experience feelings of anger and frustrationfrom time-to-time, it is important to find a way to release the toxicity in a healthy manner. So, instead of gritting your teeth and

muttering “I am fine”, release that bottled-up anger ina meaningful way by following these tips.

We often understate theimportance of repeatingcalming affirmations to

soothe our troubled mind. The nexttime you find yourself fuming withanger, take some deep breaths andrepeat any statement which bringsyou some peace.

SOME OF THE STATEMENTS CAN BE:➤ “This situation is atemporary phase”

➤ “This too shall pass”

➤ “I am stronger thanmy problems”

➤ “I will be okay andthis time will pass”

CALMING AFFIRMATIONSREPEAT

If you feel overwhelmed with emotions andare not able to find a healthy way to expressyourself, just jot it down. When youbegin writing down what you are feeling,it helps you understand the situation better, and puts you in a healthier frameof mind to handle it accordingly.

It also helps you prioritise your prob-lems and identify what is causing theanger, irritation or frustration. You canalso write down whatever you are feelingon a piece of paper and tear it after youare done.

IT DOWNWRITE

Ifyou have issues

with a family member ora friend, talk it out and clearthe air. “Don’t hold a grudge

(if you feel let down orwronged) as it affects yourmental well-being,” advises

psychiatrist Dr JitendraNagpal

Phot

o:Ge

tty

Imag

es

LIFE SKILLS

Don’t hammer a nail on acommon wall that you sharewith the apartment next doorafter 9 pm. Be careful aboutkeeping the volume of musicat an appropriate level too.

Avoid being a noisy neighbour

ETIQUETTE

MEAL WISE

While people are usually mindful about the bigger aspects of table manners, there is a chance that less obviousetiquette norms may be slipping from your mind. Check this manner manual to be a great diner and guest

5 Table etiquette mistakes we make

NOT INFORMING ABOUT FOOD RESTRICTIONS BEING GLUED TO YOUR SMARTPHONEWhether you are vegan,celiac, or vegetarian, youshould let your host knowyour dietary limitationsbefore a dining event.Informing in advancegives your host ampletime to plan an appropri-ate menu or select arestaurant accordingly.Waiting until arrival canmake for an uncomfort-able evening for both theguest and the host.

Checking, rechecking,and glancing at yourphone again and againis plain rude. It’s pret-ty disrespectful to con-stantly look at yourscreen or use socialmedia sites during animportant lunch meet-ing or dinner with fam-ily or friends. Do resistthe urge to pick upyour phone on everysingle notification.

A genuine ‘thank you’ goes a long way in making the hostfeel appreciated. A quick text or email after an event isalways expected and is the right thing to do to show thatyou care. Of course, a handwritten note is the best – but not

always possible.

IGNORING CO-DINERSIt is easy and perhaps simple to just chat with your bestfriend during a lunch/dinner, but that’s not the most politething to do. Make small talk with everyone seated, even ifyou don’t know them well. It is rude to keep talking to one ortwo people and ignore others.

NOT THANKING THE HOST

COMPILED BY TEAM NIE

NOT PASSING FOOD CORRECTLYrequest of a co-diner, it’sconsidered bad manners todo a little stop and takesome for yourself. Note this: Salt and pepperalways travel together. Ifyou are offering salt, dopass on the pepper, too.

Food and condiments shouldbe passed around the tablecounterclockwise. When youare passed an item that youdo not want, just continuemoving it around the table.If you are the middle persondelivering a plate on the

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