day 1 – the thesis writing organization. tthe most important sentence in the paper (hear the...
TRANSCRIPT
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Day 1 – The Thesis
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The most important sentence in the paper (hear the echo?)
States what your whole paper’s about Gives a “road map” for the essay It’s in the INTRO paragraph- typically at
the end
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Contains a SUBJECT, an OPINION/ INFERENCE, and LIMITERS
Example:
My father is a good man, because he coaches young kids, works hard as a father, and volunteers his time with at-risk youth.
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The Earthquake Burger is the Puyallup Fair’s biggest disappointment, because it has shrunk from the size of a plate to that of my face, one has to pay for extra toppings, and despite all the promise, the ground has stood still with every bite.
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Write a thesis statement relating to the topic below. Include the 3 parts of a thesis statement (SO/IL) and label each part.
Topic: Fair food
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Write 5 thesis statements for the following questions (and label the subject, opinion/inference, and limiters):
1) What is your favorite time of day?2) “Teenagers should not speak unless
spoken to.” Do you agree or disagree?3) What is your favorite memory from
childhood?4) What is your favorite movie?5) Is Sumner/Bonney Lake a good place for
kids to grow up?
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Day #2 Day #2 Topic Topic
SentencesSentences
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Topic SentencesTopic Sentences
11stst sentence in a body paragraph sentence in a body paragraph Must have a Must have a subjectsubject and an and an
opinion/inferenceopinion/inference (sound familiar?) (sound familiar?) Tells the reader what that paragraph will Tells the reader what that paragraph will
be aboutbe about
Thesis = Road map for the paperThesis = Road map for the paper
Topic sentence = Road map for the Topic sentence = Road map for the paragraphparagraph
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THESIS: THESIS: My fatherMy father is a good man, because is a good man, because he he coaches young kidscoaches young kids, , works hard as a fatherworks hard as a father, and , and volunteers his time with at-risk youthvolunteers his time with at-risk youth. .
Paragraph #1Paragraph #1
TS – One thing that makes TS – One thing that makes my dad a good man is that my dad a good man is that
he coaches soccer for little he coaches soccer for little kids.kids.
Paragraph #2Paragraph #2
TS – Not only does he help other kids, TS – Not only does he help other kids, but my dad works hard to be a but my dad works hard to be a
good good father to me.father to me.
Paragraph #3Paragraph #3
TS – One more thing that shows that my father is a good TS – One more thing that shows that my father is a good man is that he takes time from his week to help at-risk man is that he takes time from his week to help at-risk kids.kids.
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New example . . .
Lady GaGa is the most influential person alive, because she is on the cutting-edge of fashion, performs catchy dance songs, and is constantly in the headlines for her outspoken political and social views.
TS - Paragraph #1
TS - Paragraph #2
TS - Paragraph #3
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HomeworkHomework
1) Pick one of your theses from yesterday1) Pick one of your theses from yesterday
2) Write topic sentences for each of your 2) Write topic sentences for each of your limiters.limiters.
3) Repeat the process for two more thesis 3) Repeat the process for two more thesis sentences you wrote yesterday!sentences you wrote yesterday!
Good luck!...Due tomorrow.Good luck!...Due tomorrow.
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Chunks
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What’s a CHUNK?-smallest unified group of thoughts -ONE sentence of concrete detail + TWO sentences of commentary (1:2 RATIO)
Concrete Detail (CD)Commentary (CM) 1 CHUNKCommentary (CM)
TS
CD
CM
CM
CS
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Concrete Details (CD)Specific details easy
to “see” or imagineThe “stuff” from the
storyPlay-by-play
announcerSynonyms: FACTS,
EXAMPLES, SUPPORT, EVIDENCE, QUOTATIONS
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Concrete Details (CD)Examples:Both Romeo and Juliet die in
Act IV.
Ludacris is on a bowling team.
The school has 1,400 kids in it, and it was built for 1,200.
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Commentary (CM)Your comment or inference about somethingStuff from your head (i.e. not CD)Color commentatorSynonyms: Analysis, insight, interpretation
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Helper phrases for youTS
CD For example, . . .
CM (This shows that . . . )
CM (This also shows that . . .) OR(This is because . . .) OR(This is important because . . . )
CS
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Example CHUNK:TSCD For example, Ludacris is on a
bowling team.
CM (This shows that) he likes to escape from the limelight sometimes.
CM (This is because) it must be hard for celebrities to find time for fun without cameras on them.
CS
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Homework!1) Pick one TS from your homework last night
2) Create a CHUNK for that TS
3) Now write 2 more chunks for the rest of that THESIS (3 total)
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Def: The method an author uses to reveal characters and their personalities
4 Methods What s/he does What s/he looks like What s/he says What others say about him/her
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Watch the clip of “Beauty and the Beast”.
Track details of Belle’s APPEARANCE, ACTIONS, and WORDS
Then make inferences on the right of that page
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THESIS:
In the movie, Beauty and the Beast, the filmmaker uses _____________________ to reveal that the main character is ____________, _________, and ________.
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THESIS:
In the movie, Beauty and the Beast, the filmmaker uses Belle’s physical appearance to reveal that the main character is down to earth, joyous, and carefree.
TS: The animators uses what Belle looks like to reveal that the she is a humble girl.
*Note: You want to make sure the TS & Thesis Subject & Opinion/Inferences line up, but avoid repetition.
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Using the limiters we discussed, construct your thesis sentence about the character of Belle.
Then, create a TS, CD, CM, CM, & CS for each limiter
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“Priscilla and the Wimps”
by Richard Peck
Concluding sentences (cs) AND w.o.w.
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Here are our steps so far…
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TS Priscilla is brave to confront the thugs who are terrorizing her school.
CD
CM
CM
CS
We wrote our TS to describe our character:
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She sent the Kobra to go get Monk Klutter so she could talk to him herself.
She “frog-marches” Monk into his own locker.
When the Kobra tries to take Melvin’s wallet, she hits him with her hand and makes him let go of her friend.
Then we listed cd TO PROVE SHE’S BRAVE…(CHOOSE ONE):
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TS Priscilla is brave to confront the thugs who are terrorizing her school.
CD For example, when the Kobra tries to take Melvin’s wallet, she hits him with her hand and makes him let go of her friend.
CM
CM
CS
…And added it to our paragraph:
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Powerful confident Hulk hero
MLKcourageChuck Norrisfearless
Protect defendstand up
Rescue bold unyielding
Then used W.O.W. to generate CM:
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TS Priscilla is brave to confront the thugs who are terrorizing her school.
CD For example, when the Kobra tries to take Melvin’s wallet, she hits him with her hand and makes him let go of her friend.
CM (This shows that) She wants to protect her friend from harassment and violence.
CM (This is important because) It’s that confidence and courage that enables her to stand up for what’s right.
CS
…Constructed our commentary:
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Write this down: The last sentence in a body paragraph It’s all commentary Does not repeat key words Gives a finished feeling to the
paragraph
And now, finally…our closing sentence!:
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For example, . . . (This shows that . . . ) (This also shows that . . .) (This is because . . .) (This is important because . . . )
As a result, . . .
TS
CD
CM
CM
CS
(Another Helper Phrase for you):
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TS Priscilla is brave to confront the thugs who are terrorizing her school.
CD For example, when the Kobra tries to take Melvin’s wallet, she hits him with her hand and makes him let go of her friend.
CM (This shows that) She wants to protect her friend from harassment and violence.
CM (This is important because) It’s that confidence and courage that enables her to stand up for what’s right.
CS As a result, Priscilla is the new hero on campus.
Now, add the cs:
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TS
CD For example,
CM (This shows that)
CM (This is important because/ This also shows that/ This is because)
CS As a result,
Let’s try it for your first Beauty & The Beast Chunk:
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Finish the second and third chunks on the Beauty and the Beast page in your packet
DUE: Tomorrow
Tonight’s Homework:
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PREWRITING FOR ORGANIZATION
Spiders, Bubbles, Lists, Outlines, & Columns
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PRE-WRITING
The process of getting your concrete details down on paper BEFORE you organize your essay into paragraphs
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1) BUBBLE CLUSTER
1. The subject of the pre-writing goes in the middle circle
2. Each circle is numbered. The center bubble is #1 (=>THESIS)
3. You should have 2-3 bubbles that extend from the center bubble. These are #2’s (=>TS’s)
4. Then you should have 2 #3 bubbles extending from each of those (=>CD’s)
It should look like this . . .
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PRE-WRITING
Bubble Cluster
Main Idea
#3=>CD
#2 => TS
#3=>CD
#2 => TS
#3=>CD
#3=>CD
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2) SPIDER DIAGRAM
1. The subject of the pre-writing has a box around it.
2. Each idea is numbered3. This has 2-3 #2 ideas and 2 #3 ideas (just
like bubble clusters4. This way of pre-writing uses straight lines
instead of circles.
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PRE-WRITING
Spider Diagram
Main Idea
#3#3
#3
#3
#2
#2
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PINK & SAY
Write a pre-write and thesis for a 4-paragraph essay that uses 2-chunk paragraphs for the following prompt:
How does Pink show unconditional love for Say?
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HOW DO I WRITE A 2-CHUNK PARAGRAPH?
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IF A 1-CHUNK PARAGRAPH LOOKS LIKE THIS . . .
Concrete Detail (CD) Commentary (CM) 1 CHUNK Commentary (CM)
TS
CD
CM
CM
CS
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THEN A 2-CHUNK PARAGRAPH LOOKS LIKE THIS.
Concrete Detail (CD) Commentary (CM) 1 CHUNK Commentary (CM)
Concrete Detail (CD) Commentary (CM) 2 CHUNK Commentary (CM)
TS
CD
CM
CM
CS
CD
CM
CM
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NEW HELPER PHRASE!!!
For example,
In addition,
TS
CD
CM
CM
CS
CD
CM
CM
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TONIGHT’S PRACTICE!
Write 2 2-chunk paragraphs for your Pink and Say pre-write.
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PRE-WRITING– PHASE 2
Outlines & Line Clusters
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3) OUTLINE
1. The title is the subject of the pre-writing (Thesis)
2. The lines that start with Roman numerals (I & II) are the same as your earlier #2 ideas (TS’s)
3. The lines that start with capital letters (A & B) are the same as the #3 ideas you did earlier (CD’s)
It should look like this . . .
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3) OUTLINE
Subject (=>thesis)I. (TS/lim)
A. Example (CD) B. Example (CD)
II. (TS/lim) A. Example (CD) B. Example (CD)
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PRE-WRITING
Line Clustering In line clustering you put the subject of the essay
you are working on at the top. You then complete three steps to do a line
cluster
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LINE CLUSTERING
LISTList all of the ideas
that come into your mind regarding your subject
You should list SIX ideas Each IDEA should have
at least FIVE words in it
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YOUR HOMEWORK!
How is the Wombles’ story an allegory for humans’ life on Earth?
Write a pre-write and a thesis for an essay with 2 2-chunk body paragraphs.
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LINE CLUSTERING LIST (Example)
Subject: Dogs are my favorite kind of animals Very loyal and loveable all
of the time Fun to play with both
inside and outside the house
They take a lot of care and attention
Large dogs need much more space than small dogs
Small dogs can stay in your lap and in your bed
Small dogs can make neighbors more upset
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LINE CLUSTERING After you list everything
you then think of ways you can CATEGORIZE the things in your list together Example from the left:
Categories can be: A: Benefits of Dogs B: Challenges of Caring for
Dogs
Subject: Dogs are my favorite kind of animals Very loyal and loveable
all of the time Fun to play with both
inside and outside the house
They take a lot of care and attention
Large dogs need much more space than small dogs
Small dogs can stay in your lap and in your bed
Small dogs can make neighbors more upset
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LINE CLUSTERING
STEP THREE: Label each of your
IDEAS in your LIST by the CATEGORY
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LINE CLUSTERING
Category A: Benefits Very loyal and loveable
all of the time Fun to play with both
inside and outside the house
Small dogs can stay in your lap and in your bed
Category B: Challenges
They take a lot of care and attention
Large dogs need much more space than small dogs
Small dogs can make neighbors more upset
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COLUMNS
The last form of Pre Writing in the Schaffer Method is forming Columns
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COLUMNS
#1The subject of your pre writing goes
in this box
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COLUMNS
#1Dogs
#2Two main ideas go in the second
two boxes
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COLUMNS
#1Dogs
#2 Companions
Responsibility
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COLUMNS
#1Dogs
#2 Companions
Responsibility
#3Each idea in #3 has at least five
words
Each idea in #3 has at least five
words
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COLUMNS
#1Dogs
#2 Companions
Responsibility
#3–Very loyal
and loveable all of the time
-They take a lot of
care and attention
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INTRODUCTORY & CONCLUSION PARAGRAPHS
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3 Things you must do in your INTRO
1. Grab the reader’s attention
2. Smoothly bridge the attention-grabber to the thesis
3. State your thesis
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3 Types of Attention-grabbers
1. Story or anecdote2. Startling or unusual fact or statistic3. Relevant quote
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Conclusion Paragraph
To wrap it up right, your conclusion must meet these 3 criteria:
1) It must be all commentary2) It must restate the thesis in different
words3) It must give a finished feeling to the
essay1) “CALL TO ACTION” for persuasive writing