DIRKSECounseling and Consulting, Inc.

Pushing Past ‘I Don’t Know”Effective Communication Strategies

Gabriela Taylor –Dirkse Counseling & ConsultingWilliam Ramis- Portland Oregon

Introduction

Communication - the human connection - is the key to personal and career success.

Paul J. Meyer

The Basics of Communication

No matter how experienced we are, we should always review the basics, to continually strengthen our own foundation, to be the

most effective to those we support.

Four Basic Communication Skills

▪ Thinking

▪ Listening

▪ Speaking

▪ Non-Verbal

By understanding the basics of each component, we are better able to find the source of breakdowns in communication

Communication Skills # 1: Thinking

-Most people do not consider thinking a communication skill!

-Having a strong understanding of the ideas in your head, or the concepts that you wish to illustrate is the starting point to effective communication.

-If a person does not have an idea straight in their own mind, it makes expressing it to others , almost impossible.

Example: If you are asked to describe an animal to a friend , but you do not have an animal in mind, it would be nearly impossible to clearly communicate this information.

If a person doesn’t have an opinion to make- how can we expect it to be communicated?“What do you want to do for work?”

Communication Skills # 2: Listening

-An ability to use active listening and to be able to understand the purpose or intent of what the others are saying is key in communication

-Only when information is heard and understood is response communication effective

-You cannot truly communicate with someone if you do not understand the purpose of the communication

It goes both ways- both parties need to understand the intent by truly listening !

It is important to understand the environment, and take the time to understand distractions to listening !

Communication Skills # 3: Expressing/Speaking

-Actually choosing the words, pictures, or symbols is the next step in communication

-Although this is the piece that most people focus on when talking about communication , research has shown that the nonverbal portions of communication can actually change the meaning of what is expressed

-Although this piece is important, we must remember that this is not the step where communication is successful or not successful

Be Careful! Just because someone speaks with clarity and confidence, or uses assistive technology or pictures with ease, does not always mean they are confident or sure in the content of what they are expressing!

Communication Skills # 4: Non-Verbal

- Non –verbal communication is the bulk of our communication (93% of it, to be exact!)

- Our bodies speak volumes – everyone is constantly sending signals, whether they are intending to or not

- Body language (in conjunction with tone) can easily cancel out the things being expressed !

Putting the 4 Steps Together

-Understanding the role of each will help you map out where the break down is occurring

-It is our job as providers to identify these basic communication skills for both the people we serve and ourselves so that communication is effective

-Once we identify which skill is compromised, we can than develop a plan to work around it

If we become complacent, and do not take the time to assess , all communication with the customer moving forward will not be as successful as it could be.

Success

Thinking

Listening

Expressing

Non-Verbal

Where's The Holdup?

Thinking

Listening

Expressing

Non-Verbal

-Did they understand?-Do they know what I asked?-How do I know

Distractions? Noise? Lights? People?Smells? Traffic?Lighting?

-Can they express?-How do they express?-Any “go to” answers -Do they have the means to express?

Tone?Face?Body ?What am I doing?What are they doing?

Barriers to Communication

• Stereotypes • Attitudinal Barriers • Learned Helplessness • Support Team• Professional Complacency

▪ Although there are countless barriers to communications in our day to day interactions, for the purposes of this presentation we are going to focus on the barriers that fall under the following definition :

▪ The things stopping us from getting the bulk of our information from the perspective of the client themselves.

“To effectively communicate, we must realize that we are all different in the way we perceive the world and use this understanding as a guide to our communication with others.”-Tony Robbins

Stereotyping is an attitude that alters communication because of a general, non specific opinion applied to a particular group.

1. Individuals who experience ID/DD struggle with open ended questions

What information could be lost when we assume and only ask yes or no questions?

2. Individuals on the spectrum struggle with communication, keep questions direct, focused, and literal.

This stereotype takes away the ability to work within creative ideas, which is where most job carves develop from

3. Individuals with limited ability to use expressive communication get overwhelmed by too many questions

Expressive communication and thoughts are two separate things, questions evoke thoughts and ideas, doing this limits the persons ability to be supported towards their goals

Stereotypes

Attitudinal Barriers

▪ Attitudinal barriers are behaviors or perceptions that prevent providers from communicating properly.

▪ Attitudes are commonly formed by an individual's opinions or personal feelings on a subject or person and can be difficult to alter.

▪ When attitudinal barriers override the client perspective, communication will not be effective, and services will no longer be client centered.

▪ It is imperative to understand both your own personal attitudinal barriers, as well as being mindful of your clients potential attitudinal barriers

EMOTIONAL EDITING

FEAR

IGNORANCE SPREAD EFFECT

Ignorance: People with disabilities are often dismissed as incapable of communicating clearly without the opportunity to try

The Spread Effect: People assume that an individual's disability negatively affects all of their abilities, including communication .

Emotional Editing: Using past experiences as the soul source of information in the current situation.

Fear: The fear of offending, challenging or pushing too hard

Attitudinal Barriers

Learned Helplessness

Learning to tolerate the reality of the environment and those in it, due to the information received on a regular basis.

Choose for

Me

Identify my

interests for me

Decide what I am good at

Speak for me

Tell people what is important to me in a job

Act for me

You are the professional , what are you afraid of?

We often find ourselves scared to:

▪ Speak up against a support team member

▪ To push our clients , to challenge them

▪ To offend them

▪ Take risks

▪ Push boundaries

▪ Change our own professional routine

We often let ourselves:

▪ Get lazy

▪ Be hurried

▪ Ignore the client

▪ Take the easy route

▪ Become complement

▪ Be afraid of prolonged silence

▪ Get bullied away from effective practices

Developing a Communication Plan

Step 1: Identify Key Members of the support team

Step 2: Use the communication interview support tool

Step 3: Develop a communication plan

Step 4: Implement communication plan & assess

Communication Interview Support Tool

Go to the source!

-Who does that person communicate the best with ?

-Where do they communicate the best ?

-In what situations are the individuals barriers to communication least impactful ?

-What are the unique and specific aspects of this persons communication patterns?

Do the ground work ! It’s not about what works for you, or about what past experience you have, it’s

about what works for them!

Professional Experience

Support Team

Creating a Plan