creating and maintaining positive relationships at work

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  • Slide 1
  • Creating and Maintaining Positive Relationships at Work
  • Slide 2
  • Ideas taken from Life would be easy if it weren't for other people One Take on the Basics of Communication Communication to achieve mutually satisfying solutions, honour positive relationships and foster respect. (assertive) Communication that avoids confrontation, criticism and complaints at all costs tends to avoid getting involved or taking action. (passive) Communication that uses manipulation e.g. whining, yelling, pouting, screaming, complaining, crying, getting ones feelings hurt. (aggressive) Communication designed to pay someone back or teach someone a lesson avoids confrontation but uses manipulation to get even (passive-aggressive)
  • Slide 3
  • Some of my best advice about working in a new (to you) school Observe and listen to the school culture, reflect on what you can learn from it and how you can contributeObserve and listen to the school culture, reflect on what you can learn from it and how you can contribute Be willing to do more following than leading in your first year but dont be a leech contribute positively to your environmentBe willing to do more following than leading in your first year but dont be a leech contribute positively to your environment Find a colleague (it doesnt have to be in your school) to whom you can turn when you have questions or want to reflect on a situationFind a colleague (it doesnt have to be in your school) to whom you can turn when you have questions or want to reflect on a situation
  • Slide 4
  • 15 Most often used strategies when managing situations
  • Slide 5
  • Forewarned is forearmed - Cervantes Knowledge is power -Francis Bacon 1. Gather Pertinent Information
  • Slide 6
  • Fools rush in where angels fear to tread -Alexander Pope Timing is everything -George Burns 2. Defer Action
  • Slide 7
  • 3. Refuse to be baited It takes two to make a fight -Unknown Fools bite one another, but wise men agree together -George Herbert
  • Slide 8
  • 4. Compile a list of positive responses to use during uncomfortable discussions Honey catches more flies than vinegar -Franklin Praimanac
  • Slide 9
  • 5. Learn to apologize It takes a big person to say Im sorry. -Unknown
  • Slide 10
  • 6. Listen to body messages Fear is the beginning of wisdom - Unknown
  • Slide 11
  • 7. Develop a plan to get help An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure - Scammell To be prepared for war is one of the most effectual means of preserving peace - George Washington
  • Slide 12
  • 8. Get a grip Think before you speak - William Shakespeare
  • Slide 13
  • 9. Be selective when speaking Dont open a can of worms -Unknown
  • Slide 14
  • 10. Recognize enemies and dissenters Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me -Unknown
  • Slide 15
  • 11. Speak Softly Speak softly and carry a big stick -Teddy Roosevelt
  • Slide 16
  • 12. Develop listening skills Listen, dont just hear - Unknown
  • Slide 17
  • 13. Utilize credible witnesses There is strength in numbers -Unknown
  • Slide 18
  • 14. Remain Detached Sticks and stones may break my bones, but names will never hurt me -Mother Goose
  • Slide 19
  • 15. Move on Dont cry over split milk - Andrew Yamanton Dont spit into the wind - Jim Croce Dont let your heart rule your head -Unknown
  • Slide 20
  • Red, Yellow, Green Cards
  • Slide 21
  • Nonviolent Communication Also called Compassionate Communication, Mindful Communication, Conscious Communication, Authentic CommunicationAlso called Compassionate Communication, Mindful Communication, Conscious Communication, Authentic Communication The goal is to generate a climate where everyones needs can be considered equally.The goal is to generate a climate where everyones needs can be considered equally. Used when there is an intention to make a connection.Used when there is an intention to make a connection. Which means we may choose not to use it in certain interactions.
  • Slide 22
  • Basic Premises of NVC All humans have the same needs, and all we are ever trying to do, with our words and actions, is to have those needs met.All humans have the same needs, and all we are ever trying to do, with our words and actions, is to have those needs met. People are fundamentally compassionate, but we have been trained to appreciate violence.People are fundamentally compassionate, but we have been trained to appreciate violence. Each person is responsible for their feelings, as they are born out of their own needs. Each person is responsible for getting their own needs met.Each person is responsible for their feelings, as they are born out of their own needs. Each person is responsible for getting their own needs met. It is possible to express ourselves authentically and remain respectful of others.It is possible to express ourselves authentically and remain respectful of others.
  • Slide 23
  • The NVC Process OBSERVATIONS the facts (actions, words, gestures) that trigger a reaction in you. NOT interpretations, evaluations, labelsOBSERVATIONS the facts (actions, words, gestures) that trigger a reaction in you. NOT interpretations, evaluations, labels FEELINGS Your reaction to the observations creates feelings in you. All feelings are linked to a need.FEELINGS Your reaction to the observations creates feelings in you. All feelings are linked to a need. NEEDS - Identify the need that is linked to the feeling. Needs are universal, intangible, and intrinsic.NEEDS - Identify the need that is linked to the feeling. Needs are universal, intangible, and intrinsic. REQUESTS state how you will take charge of meeting your needs, without making demands.REQUESTS state how you will take charge of meeting your needs, without making demands.
  • Slide 24
  • 2-way Intention to Connect Authentic ExpressionEmpathic Listening I express my observationI receive your observation I express my feelingI receive your feeling I express my needI receive your need I express my requestI receive your request
  • Slide 25
  • Practice Visualize heading into the same old fight with your partner or a family memberVisualize heading into the same old fight with your partner or a family member A difficult conversation with a parent of a studentA difficult conversation with a parent of a student A chronic issue you have with a colleagueA chronic issue you have with a colleague
  • Slide 26
  • 5 steps To Poor Listening Remember strategy 12?Remember strategy 12? Jackpot! Read article and be ready to answer 5 questions about the articleJackpot! Read article and be ready to answer 5 questions about the article
  • Slide 27
  • Teaching Compulsory Courses Teaching compulsory courses is no different from teaching other electives. 4-corners: strongly agree, somewhat agree, somewhat disagree, strongly disagree Go to your corner and compile and chart a list of reasons, and/or examples in your group. Post your list, then we will all do a walk about and consider the other viewpoints.