Scout 2009

Why we communicate

Critical success factor for life

Communication Game

Communication usually fails, except by accident

As a constructive summary, we can just state that you cannot

communicate successfully. You can only increase the odds of

accidental success.

Source:

What to communicate?Target of talkingBoundaries (self & others)

Usefulness of the communication.Is it positive … or negative

Accuracy of the Information to be communicated.Is it under estimate or exaggerating

Encoding:• The process of transferring the information you want to communicate into

a form that can be sent and correctly decoded at the other end.

• Ability to convey the information.

• Eliminate sources of confusion. For e.g. cultural issues, mistaken assumptions, and missing information.

• Knowing your audience.

Written Communication Channels Letters,

e-Mails,

Memos,

Reports.

Verbal Communication ChannelsFace-To-Face meetings,

Telephones,

Video Conferencing.

Strengths and WeaknessesVerbal Communication:

Strength - Role of Body Language.

Weakness - Not possible to give long list of directions

Written Communication:

Strength - A proof of a communication

Weakness - Written words does not show a person’s actual feelings.

EFFECTIVE DECODING:Listen actively,

Reading information carefully,

Avoid Confusion,

Ask question for better understanding. The audience or individuals to whom we are sending the information.

THE INFLUENCE FOR RECEIVER:

• The prior knowledge can influence the receiver’s understanding of the message.

• Blockages in the receiver’s mind.

• The surrounding disturbances.

FEEDBACK:

Feedback can be:

Verbal Reactions and Non-Verbal Reactions.

Positive feedback and Negative feedback.

Listening Skills1. Motivation2. How to Listen3. Paraphrasing, Summarizing and Questioning

1-Motivation

Be able to:Describe reasons that communication failsList strategies to improve communicationParaphrase and summarize conversationsUse appropriate questioning techniques

Listening and Speaking are used a lot…

Amount taught

2-How to Listen

Distortion

What causes distortion?Speaker

LanguageWordinessSemanticsEmotionsInflections

ListenerPerceptionsPreconceived

notions/expectationsPhysical hearing

problemSpeed of thoughtPersonal interestsEmotionsAttention spanNo active

listening!

30% of you aren’t paying attention right now!

Are you simply waiting for your turn to talk? Are you thinking about your reply before the

other person has finished talking?Are you waiting for something after this

lecture?

Listening and speaking require energyListening takes. . .

concentration and energycuriosity and open-mindednessanalysis and understanding

Speaking requires. . .sharp focuslogical thinkingclear phrasingcrisp delivery

How to be an active listenerSet the stage

Choose an appropriate physical environmentRemove distractionsBe open and accessibleMaintain relaxed, open posture that shows

concentrationEnsure mutual understanding

Reflect feelingsOffer acknowledgements (say “uh-huh”)Paraphrase main ideasInterrupt to clarifyConfirm next steps

Understand body languageObserve position and posturingMake eye contactConsider expression and gestures

Suspend judgmentConcentrateKeep an open mindHear the person outDo not react to emotive words

Behaviors that hinder effective listeningAct distracted (look at your watch!)Tell your own story without acknowledging

theirsGive no responseInvalidate response, be negativeInterruptCriticizeDiagnose what was saidGive advice/solutions quicklyChange the subjectReassure without acknowledgment

PARAPHRASEPARAPHRASE

Restate what was said in your own words

PARAPHRASEPARAPHRASE

Restate what was said in your own words

SUMMARIZESUMMARIZE

Pull together the main points of a speaker

SUMMARIZESUMMARIZE

Pull together the main points of a speaker

QUESTIONQUESTION

Challenge speaker to think further, clarifying both your and their understanding

QUESTIONQUESTION

Challenge speaker to think further, clarifying both your and their understanding

3

Practice ParaphrasingParaphrasing is

simply restating what another person has said in your own words.

Use phrases such as:

In other words…I gather that…If I understand what

you are saying…What I hear you

saying is…Pardon my

interruption, but let me see if I understand you correctly…

Practice SummarizingSummarizing pulls

important ideas, facts or data together.

Useful for emphasizing key points and setting the stage for further discussion.

The person summarizing must listen carefully in order to organize the information systematically.

Try out these summarizing phrases:“If I understand you

correctly, your main concerns are…”

“These seem to be the key ideas you have expressed… ”

Two basic types of questions1. Closed questions:

Get a one-word response and inhibit thought. Questions begin with who, when and which

2. Open-ended questions: Invite unique thought, reflection or an

explanation. Questions begin with how, what and how

come (not why!).

Communication Rights and ResponsibilitiesRIGHTS

1. You have the right to be treated with respect.

2. You have the right to have and express your own opinions.

3. You have the right to ask for what you need and want in order to be effective.

4. You have the right to set reasonable limits.

RESPONSIBILITIES

1. You have the responsibility to treat others with respect.

2. You have the responsibility to listen to the opinions of others.

3. You have the responsibility to acknowledge and address the needs of others.

4. You have the responsibility to respect the limits and boundaries of others.

Communication StylesPassive Assertive Aggressive

Extends but doesnot feel entitled

to “rights;”accepts

responsibilities

Both exercisesand

extends “rights”and

responsibilities

Demandsbut does not

extend “rights;”does not acceptresponsibilities

Why Aren't You Talking to Me?Eye avoidanceLack of smilingHand and arm placementPostureSilenceInvolvement shields

Communication tipsTake a break and listenRepeat what you heardAsk specific questions to gather more

information.See the situation through others eyes.Acknowledge the others feelingsListen don’t judgePause to consider others requestShare your thinking out loud.Focus on the positive before bringing up the

negative.Listen to your tone instead of your words.

Summary

Why we talkCommunication

process SourceEncodingChanelDecodingReceiverFeed back

Listening skillsMotivationHow to listenParaphrasing,

summarizing and questions

Communication rights and responsibilities

Communication styles Why aren't you talk to meTalking tips