Communication

Parts of communication

BodyLanguage

Words Tone

7% 38%

55%

Congruence

Basic of model for effective communication

Push

Assertive

My Agenda Your Agenda

Pull

Responsive

Energy Energy

Assertive

Being assertive is:

– using your energy to move another person towards an outcome that you believe is right.

Key:– clear purpose – Language clear and concise– Express idea/emotion/expectation first

• Reason later

Responsive

• Being responsive is: – about using your energy to respond to another person,

• understand them & their problems

– letting them know that you are listening

• Key: – Putting aside own ideas– Genuine interest– Actively listening– Questioning to understand them– Working at their pace– Letting them do most of the talking

If you are being assertivewhat would they be like?

Words

Tone

BodyLanguage

If you are being responsivewhat would they be like?

Words

Tone

BodyLanguage

Responsive

Words

Tone

BodyLanguage

Can you tell me more about….? Where is it we disagree?

In what way? What happened next?

Which did you find worked best?

Reflect & Summarise

Reflecting that of the speaker

Softer, rather than forceful

Use of silence to enable thinking

“Uh huh” etc. to encourage further disclosure

Reflecting that of the speaker

Good eye contact, maybe sitting rather than standing

Nodding to encourage further speech

Paying full attention to speaker

Listening activity

The robber

Questioning

What types of questions can you use?

Types of useful questioning

Open

Probing

Closed

In what way is my homework not good enough?

What would I need to do better?

So if I change that it will be good?

Listening & questioning activity

Assertive

Being assertive is:

– using your energy to move another person towards an outcome that you believe is right.

Key:– clear purpose – Language clear and concise– Express idea/emotion/expectation first

• Reason later

Assertive

Words

Tone

Body Language

Typically starting with I/My…

My view is …/I strongly recommend … /I’m devastated about…. because/I want us to have reached a decision by…….

Concise

State idea first…..before any reason

Calm & natural pace – not over fast

Using level of emotion appropriate to your statement

Natural rise and fallStrong volume

Firm even stance – think of string

Strong level eye contact

Feet firmly planted on floor

Free large gestures & movement

Assertive activity

“My name is…and I’ve got something to say”

Words

Tone

BodyLanguage

The bus tour