communication.. is a dance. would you like to know how to … … … ? be honest without insulting...
TRANSCRIPT
Communication
. . is a dance
Would you like to know how to … … … ?
• be honest without insulting people• be heard to your complete satisfaction• handle conflict with confidence• transform anger into positive
communication• never hear blame or criticism again• inspire willing cooperation• deepen your good relationships• enjoy people
NVC is a way to develop life-changing abilities.
The NVC Dance Floorby
BRIDGET BELGRAVE and
GINA LAWRIE
Receivingyou
Expressing myself
Connectingwith myself
The Frame of Intention !
your temple for mind,
heart & soul
Intention
The inner dance
Connecting with myself
The inner-outer dance
Expressing myself
Receiving you
8 INNER & OUTER Dances3 inner-outer dances for role-playing
13 steps danceto learn and practise the basic skills
integration & connection to internalize the process and develope connection
fluency dance to remain compassionate .. whatever the situation
5 inner dances for transformative inner processesself-empathy dance Take time for self-care! to reach out for clarity and
self-empowermentanger/shame dance transform anger and shame into constructive internal
states and connect with what really matters
Yes/No dance move beyond inner conflict & uncertainty to take a decision you won't regret
educator/chooser dance explore something you did that you regret and gain genuine self-acceptance
transforming pain dance transform the pain of unmet needs into the beauty of needs .. to heal deep pain from the past
Talking .. nice
Talking .. with brutal honesty
Talking .. compassionate
Feel it !! Feel it .. in your body
Feel the power of embodying this process .. step by step
How to use the Dance Floor 1
Learn how NVC works in a conversation• Practice the 13 basic steps of NVC• Transform judgments into need-based awareness.• Discover the 3 modes: • Connecting with myself – Receiving you – Expressing myself• Choose between the 3 modes, moment by moment
Dance on the Dance Floor• Pause while you sense your intention for this 'dance'• Now step onto the Dance Floor and choose which step to • start on. You can start anywhere!• Continue to make choices about where to go to next.
How to use the Dance Floor 2
Explore an imagined conversationThe 13 steps Dance helps you explore an imagined conversation, using the NVC process in order to 'dance' the steps you need to know something about the path: Observation, Feelings, Needs, Request
Imagine what the other person saysWhenever you feel the other person would say something, include that in your imagined conversation. Say it aloud .. or just imagine them saying it.Or ask someone to play the role or the other person.
The other person speaks from outside the intention frame. Everything inside the intention frame is you!
Non-emphatic responses are
Advise “I think you should…” “How come you didn’t…?”
One-upping “That’s nothing! Once I was…”
Educate “This could turn into a positive experience for you if you"
Console “It wasn’t your fault. You did the best you could.” Story-telling “That reminds me of the time …”
Shut down “Cheer up. Don’t feel so bad." "Don't cry ..”
Interrogate “When did this begin? Where exactly was this?”
Explain “I would have called but…”
Disconnecting Language
The healing of disconnecting language
First of all : be compassionate & loving with yourself !
JUDGEMENTS & BLAMES The very first dance though is .. Empty all your anger and disappointment .. Feel it, shout it, give space to all the ugly words and thoughts that want to come to your mind !!
JUST KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT !! DO NOT SAY A WORD !!
CONNECT WITH ALL YOUR
NOW CONNECT WITH YOURSELF
What was my observation? What exactly did I see, hear .. where, when?
How are my feelings?be precise! name what you feel right now.
Which of my needs are (not) met?be specific! name what you need right now.
What is my request to feel good?be specific! What would you like to be done.
EXPRESS YOURSELF This is what I observed.
That's what I saw, read, heard ...
That's how I feel about it.
These are my needs.
This is my request to feel good?I woul like (you) to . . . . . . .
RECEIVE THE OTHER
Aha, this is your observation.this is what you saw, heard, read ..
Aha, that's how you feel about it.
Aha, these are the needs that are (not) met for you right now.
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Aha, this is your request to feel good.
Enjoy Life !Join a NVC Dance Floor
Group
NVC Dance Floor
gemma staub044 383 04 56079 730 93 60
www.meetup.com"Non-Violent Communication – practice group"