Chapter 6, 8, 9Communication

Peer Pressure

Conflict

Communication Styles

Aggressive- overly forceful, pushy, or hostile Passive- unwilling or unable to express

thoughts and feelings in a direct or firm manner

Assertive- expressing your views clearly and respectfully

Ways to Communicate

Speaking Listening Nonverbal

What are other ways of communicating? Which ways do you communicate the most?

Speaking Skills

The key to good communication is to say what you mean To ensure you do not sound disrespectful use “I”

messages “I” message- a statement that focuses on your

feelings rather then on someone else’s behavior They help you communicate your feelings in a positive

way without placing blame EX: YOU- Why can’t you ever show up on time?

I- I really don’t like to be left waiting- it makes me feel like you don’t think I’m important

YOU TRY! Change the “YOU” messages into “I” messages:

1. You never listen to anything I say

2. I said I’d take out the trash, and I will! You don’t have to nag on me every five minutes!

3. You are always taking my clothes without asking.

4. You always ignore me when your other friends are around.

5. Why do you always have to bring that up? You always have to talk about the past, just end it!”

Listening Skills

Active listening- paying close attention to what someone is saying and communicatingDon’t interruptShow interestRestate what you heardAsk questionsShow empathy

Nonverbal Communication

Body language- nonverbal communication through gestures, facial expressions, behaviors, and posture

Other ways of nonverbal communication?

Stack the Deck For this exercise, you will need a regular pack of playing cards and

a lot of moving–around space. Blindfolds are optional (it takes a little longer).

1. Shuffle the deck of cards well and walk around the room to give each student a card.

2. Instruct the students to keep their cards a secret. No one can see the type or color of another's card.

3. Make it clear to students that they will not be able to talk during this exercise.

4. Instruct students to assemble into 4 groups according to suits (hearts, clubs, diamonds, spades) using nonverbal communication.

5. It's more fun to blindfold every student during this exercise. 6. Once students get into those groups, they must line up in order

of rank, from ace to king. 7. The group that lines up in proper order first wins!

HEADS UP!

Peer Pressure

Peer pressure- the influence that people your age may have on you Can have a positive or negative influence on your actions and

behaviors POSITIVE: peers may inspire you to try a new activity, encourage you to

participate in community projects, involves not participating in risky behaviors or activities

NEGATIVE: may be disrespectful towar people they do not consider acceptable to their group.

Harassment- persistently annoying others; may include hurtful behaviors such as name calling, teasing, or bullying.

Engage in behaviors that go against their values

Manipulation- an in direct, dishonest, way to control or influence other people

-Making threats -Mocking or teasing -Guilt Trips

-Black mail -Bargaining -Flattery

-Bribing

Resisting Negative Peer Pressure

Develop friendships with people who share your values and interests

Friends who have respect for your health and well-being will be less likely to pressure you into doing something that goes against your values

You will also find that it is much easier to resist negative peer pressure when you have supportive friends who stand by you and respect your decision.

Refusing to go along with a group may make them appear “uncool”

Assertive Refusal Refusal Skills Steps

1. State you position- say no, and state your position simply and firmly

2. Suggest alternatives

3. Stand your ground- make it clear that you mean what you say, use strong body language, and maintain eye contact. If that still doesn’t work- walk away

Practicing assertive communication is the most effective way to deal with peer pressure

PRACTICE REFUSAL SKILLS

Conflict Refers to any disagreement, struggle, or fight Conflicts between people or groups of people are

known as interpersonal conflict Common causes:

Power struggles Personal loyalties Jealousy and envy Property disputes Conflicting attitudes and values Lack of respect

Responding to Conflict

Compromise-an agreement or a settlement of a dispute that is reached by each side making concessions.

Negotiation- the use of communication and, in many cases, compromise to settle a disagreement

1. Take time to calm down and think over the situation

2. Let each person take turns to express how they feel

3. Ask for clarification

4. Brainstorm solutions to the conflict

5. Discuss advantages and disadvantages to both sides

6. Agree on a solution

7. Follow up to ensure the solution has worked

Preparing for Negotiation

Choose the time and place carefully Check your facts Plan what you will say

TIPS

-Stay calm-Listen to each other

-Attack the problem not each other -Take responsibility

-Avoid blame or name calling -Find a solution

-Open minded