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http://qix.sagepub.com/content/early/2009/04/09/1077800409334186.citationThe online version of this article can be found at:

 DOI: 10.1177/1077800409334186

published online 9 April 2009Qualitative InquiryMichele Battle-Fisher

Conversionand "Sign of the Cross": A Black Girl's Experience With Religious Brown Skin, Kneeling and Anointing to Brown Skin, Genuflecting

  

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Qualitative InquiryVolume XX Number X

Month XXXX xx-xx© 2009 Sage Publications

10.1177/1077800409334186http://qix.sagepub.com

hosted athttp://online.sagepub.com

Brown Skin, Kneeling and Anointing to Brown Skin, Genuflecting and “Sign of the Cross”A Black Girl’s Experience With Religious Conversion

Michele Battle-FisherThe Ohio State University, Columbus

Keywords: religiosity; race and culture; qualitative; reflexivity

“Sacramental Redemption (or why you can’t ignore the Blues)”as amazing as grace, come praise His holy name.Young Sister, you are late, but god is right on time.I enter the vestibule with ivory-covered legs, newly Vaseline-greased elbows,and my right hand’s second digit erect from my palm in silent apology.amidst the pulsating baptism, can’t you hear His voice calling?as His messenger, my grammy’s pristine voice coats the congregation.as Mother Lamar nods in agreement: “He is my rock, my soul, and shield.”Hallelujah! Testify with Sister Parker that “we’ve come to praise His name.”How could you not oblige that Faith must not be questioned?Brothers and Sisters, lift your souls from those hardened earthly pews,With arms stretched to the sky or postured knees close to the anti-heaven.In the choir loft, Pawpaw swayed with his crooked gait, always weightingOn his Left, finding his rest at the right hand of god.as each 16th note evaporated into a Holy ghost-filled crescendo,He tasted the sweetest blues, like done birthed by Brother Dorsey.Sing Brother Leonard! “It’s a highway to Heaven.”Where two or three are gathered, we cannot all be wrong.My buttocks were stone numb as each found beleaguered hands holding fast,Restraining my impurity from jumping my pew and “finding the Holy ghost.”

Author’s Note: Correspondence concerning this article should be addressed to Michele Battle-Fisher, MPH, The Ohio State University, 344 East Main Street, Lancaster, OH 43130 740-681-1428, e-mail: Battle.6@osu.edu

Qualitative Inquiry OnlineFirst, published on April 9, 2009 as doi:10.1177/1077800409334186

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My god, I kept thinking, could be found in my solitude,as the spirituals of old stirred the inner rafters of my spirit.But then if my god could be found in my silent beatitude as well,Then am I a charlatan? Dear Mother of Jesus, how could I know their god?“O, absolution”Dear Heavenly Father, Penance is a Holy Sacrament.Whether the sin, mortal or venial, I am in negotiations with the Holy See.Father Ron begins: “What is the trouble, my daughter?”Stained-glass seeped translucence veiled with the sweetness of incenseBecomes my familiar center. Holy light shrouds me.Remittance begged. grace received.“give thanks to the Lord for He is good.”Holy rosaries and “Our Fathers.”Must hurry for Sister Mary Catherine behind meHas rubbed the countenance off St. Jude.Perfection is never achieved. Lord, hear my prayer.Thank god for liturgy.I am your child.absalom. amen.

Michele Battle-Fisher is presently pursuing a Doctorate in Public Health from the Ohio State University. Her intellectual pursuits include health promotion, health communication, bioethics and medical humanities.

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